:3c

I’m on a few dating apps but I don’t think they’re for me. I met my ex in person and that’s definitely more my sped but I don’t know the best way to meet girls. Any advice?

I (F22) have been crushing on a classmate of mine (F21) since last year when we first took a class together. She's a whopping 6ft tall, and is also one of the most talented, hardest-working person I've known. She’s always holding the door for me when we walk into class together (I’m 5'2" so asdfghjkl), helps me reach stuff unlike the guys in my class, and whenever we talk, she’d find a chair to sit on so we’ll be at eye level (asdofiashdf).

We’re on friendly terms but not super close. I’ve been planning to ask her out when the semester ends. We exchanged Spotify accounts recently, and I found out she’s actually a really devoted Christian—half of her playlists are literally worship songs....and y’all know how Christians feel about us girlies...

Now I’m rethinking whether I should make a move. Should I still test the water? What’s your experience falling for a Christian girl?

TW// Rant, Fatphobia and Bullying

I thought the topic of relationships would be easier once I had a lesbian friend, but to an extent I find it harder.

Yes I was a bit sad when my friends were in relationships a lot and had no trouble in men showing interest in them, but now it feels different now it's not men.

I grew up the autistic fat girl, always jokey jokey and being bullied. It's almost feels like it's in my dna that nobody will love me. And before anyone mentiones, work on your confidence. I worked on my self esteem for years and I am confident...

It's just that growing up, being treated like you were discusting, being treated like you weren't human, really does something to you. And in my opinion, that's something that self work can't really reach. Because being treated like that for many years, especially as a kid, affects you in so many ways; some that you don't even realise.

So now I've added more context...

I love my best friend, (platonicly,) and this is also her first time having a lesbian friend aswell. And it's been great, but I'm starting to get sick of hearing about her romantic endeavours, because she is pretty much always experiencing one.

I want my bestfriend to be happy, but I just want to have something to add. I want to be actually able to contribute to the conversation or actually start the conversation with an experience of my own; but I don't really have any.

It makes me feel less than.

"You'll find someone some day," things like that don't help, I don't want to feel like it's a rarity for someone to love me.

I've wanted to speak about this for a while, but I haven't had the energy, but it's getting to the point where I'm starting to feel sour...and I don't like that. I can understand why I do, but I don't want it to effect our friendship.

Before the loose weight comments come in, that's not necessarily my goal. I am also chronically ill and have gained weight from those things, so my self esteem has been lower, as my self esteem has gone down since the chronic illnesses.

I think the experience of growing up both a fat girl and an autistic girl has really effected me. Sometimes I don't feel human, because that is how I was treated, but also because it feels like I am void of the experiences I see my friends having.

Especially as my bestfriend hasn't been talking to me as much and I know because she is with a new potential partner. Maybe I'm just saying this because I haven't had much or any romantic experiences, but it feels like I'm valuing friendship more than my friends do. That romantic love is seen as the ultimate form of a relationship and not friendship.

I've just had enough of feeling like I'm less than because of my lack of experience.

What doesn't help is I know I'm somewhere on the asexual spectrum, likely demi- romantic. I don't know if I actually have feelings for anyone at all, because I just love fictional characters. Though I haven't been able to get out and meet new people that much because of my chronic illnesses. Fat and chronically ill, I feel like I have nothing going for me.

Or the fact that the fact that I was discusting was made apparent to me so much, that my mind decided not to have feelings for people because of my belief that no one could love me and find me attractive; so what is the point in having romantic feelings?

I know this was a lot, but I'm someone that tries my best to explain in detail so I can be understood better.

//Edit: I know my bestfriend is excited, because they don't have anyone that they can tell this kind of stuff too and she has told me that. I really don't want to hurt her feelings because I am glad that she is able to have the experience of talking about romance with another lesbian.//

I told a girl if they wanted to hang out with me (23f), they texted me later, but I'm confused cause I think they couldve interpreted as a friend type of thing but I like them and that's what I was trying to say. What should I do? what does it mean??

I've always had my nails EXTREMELY trimmed. Like, I would clip them CONSTANTLY and as short as I could go into the nail bed, even to the point of drawing blood a lot of the time.

I've been trying to break this habit now that I'm painting my nails regularly. It's only been a couple weeks since I stopped clipping, but it's been going well.

My question though relates to the "lesbian nails". How long is too long? Like, I have them just starting to get up to the hyponychium, with a few growing a bit faster and nearing the end of that part of the skin.

Should I keep them at about that point? How often do you typically trim your nails? Are there any other routine care tips I should keep in mind?

Very new to all this, so please and thank you <3

I(19f) went to my girlfriends(20f) house for a movie date, we watched Hunchback of Notre Dame and Anastasia. We had the most romantic dinner of mini frozen corn dogs while fighting her cat away from the plate. At the end of the date, she asked if she could kiss me and I said yes. Both of us being super awkward people, we couldn't look each other in the eye without laughing and getting embarrassed but we kissed for the first time and it was crazy awkward, but we kissed on her front porch before I left and it was absolutely amazing. Only downside, her younger sibling almost caught us

I mentioned a week ago (deleted the post) about being blocked by my ex (she had a lot of commitments/obstacles in her life that would keep us from properly being together, ex: a lavender marriage - plus internalized homophobia) and how much it hurt after dating for over half a year.

I want advice on how to move on properly. I can't look at other women at the moment (someone asked me out on a date when they found out I was single/freshly out of a relationship and I felt bad having to decline) or go through some fun event without wishing I could tell her.

This was technically my first relationship with a woman since I came out as a lesbian and it's been a rough breakup. I keep crying and then I get angry at myself for crying. I don't like feeling like this.

I know everyone in my life says I dodged a bullet and that she did me a favor and that I can do so much better than her but it's hard to feel that way when she was both someone that I loved and a good friend to me throughout the relationship.

Just bored but they are my two crush rn

Some people may say labels are constricting, and i did think so too at first. For the first few years i’ve been out to my close friends, i’ve always kept my preferences vague, as if i was too scared or ashamed. But over time i found courage in the word “lesbian”. From saying “i’m not interested in men”, to “i like women”, to “i’m gay”, to “i’m a lesbian”. It gave me more confidence and certainty too.

That’s it. Just wanted to share how much this label means to me. Now i even feel more lesbian than woman on most days hahah!

So, cheers to more lesbianism ahead! ☺️

okay so when i masturbate, i can do it without any problem, i only get sensitive when i come. but when my girlfriend touches me, i get sensitive almost immediately and im not able to come properly because it just gets too sensitive. does anyone else have this problem? what can i do? :/

I have discovered sapphic romance novels and want all of your recommendations. Just finished one called ‘Delilah Green Doesn’t Care’ and I need more. I binged this whole ass book in like a single day and will probably finish the next two books in the trilogy as soon as I can get my hands on them.

Anyone on this lovely sub a fan of the podcast Normal Gossip?? I have nobody irl to share my excitement with. RACHELLE FUCKING HAMPTON?!?! As the host of Normal Gossip?!? Are you kidding me? I'm so thrilled, and I have to celebrate with someone! 😂😂

I (20F) have been dating my girlfriend (21F) for over a year and a half; she lives with me, I get along with her family (just met her grandma last night), and on the whole, everything is great. Except I have a problem with her. And I want to start this off by saying that I feel horrible about the fact that this is even an issue for me.

We have somewhat "traditional" gender roles within our relationship- not because we feel pressured to be heteronormative, but just because those are roles that we enjoy fitting into. For example, we agreed way back that when it comes to marriage, I will be the one to propose (classic lesbians tbh, we had that figured out within weeks) because I'm the more masculine partner. She wears dresses on a night out, I wear a shirt. etc.

But that's not to say that she's not also a bit on the masculine side. She was a tomboy as a kid, same as I was. She isn't interested in having cishet female friendships, and she went to an all-girls school, which made her even more unhappy around straight girls. But the difference between us is that as adults, she's a bit more in touch with her femininity; I sort of behave like a straight guy, and she sort of behaves like something between a tomboy and a mother. And to be honest, that tomboyishness seemed great when we started dating because it was like she was a mate as well as a romantic/sexual partner. She's also very into witchcraft and tarot cards and crystals and all that malarkey, so she's someone who believes in the idea of the "divine feminine" and stuff like that (which isn't my thing, but I think it's hot 🤷🏻‍♂️). At some point a little way down the line, she started telling me that she wanted me to treat her more "like a princess", telling me that she wants to be my housewife, stuff like that, because dating me has made her feel more feminine. And that's all great, but that's only a part of her. As our relationship has gone on, I've realised how emasculated she sometimes makes me feel (and I've brought it up before, but it feels very pathetic so I don't mention it too often, especially since she's not doing it on purpose, she's just being herself). For example, she can beat me in an arm wrestle. She has mostly male coworkers and they assume she's the "man" of the relationship. She's great with technology. She's played more video games than me because her dad taught her how to pirate them when she was a kid. All of these are small things, but I'll be the first to admit that since I'm not a cis man, my masculinity is very fragile. I really need to feel like I'm the considerably more masc partner with a femme girlfriend, otherwise I will not be comfortable, and I get that with her because in the relationship, she likes to take on the feminine stuff- and that's awesome, but all those little niggling bits and pieces just make me feel so emasculated and like I should break up with her. But I don't want to end it, at all. I wish it didn't bother me so much. We love each other to bits. We've got so many plans for the future. And yes, I wish she was more femme but I'm not down for trying to change her into my model of what "my woman" should be like, because that's just not fair. So please help me; any advice at all would be so greatly appreciated. Even if it's just a kick up the arse like "stop being pathetic and just be glad you've got a gf who loves you", y'know 😅 Cheers in advance

TL;DR:

My girlfriend is more femme than me but she's still quite tomboyish and it makes me feel emasculated. Don't want to break up or try to change her. Love her very much. Please help

Alright who’s ready for an update

So I got this text from my mom haven’t responded to it yet since I’m at work and really don’t feel like unboxing this here. But everyone can read it and let me know what you all think

Caution: I know this might be the unpopular opinion but I’ll be apologizing and going back because while I do have a job it’s not well paying it’s just above minimum wage and I still have school debt, new car debt(my old one died last year), and I’m paying my current education out of pocket. Also switching out my name in the text.

Start of text below ⬇️ Look, OP you know I don't like you cut short hair but last two time I still can take it but this time your hair like your dad. You really know I am not going to accept it but you do it anyway Because you don't care me. You don't know how much I worry about your future. If you don't care why should I right?

If you still live in my house and want me take care you, first you have to say sorry to me and promise you will not do it again or you think now you are already grown up adult and me your mom can say anything to you. Please do it and move all of your stubs out as soon as possible including your cat please. Anything still in my house I will take care on my way. You know every time your mom say she will do it. Look you told to me You and GF together I didn't give you guys any hard time but you don't let me teach you. I accept her and treat her like our family member I don't know how lucky you are. I treat all your friends very well too but you didn't respect this mom. I hurt me OP.

Ends of text

If you’re confused about the some of the wording. Wellll me too lol

I'd never date a man I actually know, I probably wouldn't be attracted to that celebrity if I actually met them and I don't really consider my celebrity crushes like actual crushes

But I've seen a lot of people say I'm not a lesbian if I have celebrity crushes on men

Btw I'm not going to change my identity because I think I'm valid and I know how I feel and who I am in my heart but i just wanna have a discussion

i just need advice, but there’s this girl in my school and i’ve known her for a long time, and i’ve always had a crush on her but she’s straight (from what i know). but i quite literally cannot stop thinking of her and looking for her at school. even when i try and distract myself she’s just on my mind. we do talk to each other but we’re not as close as we used to be, years ago. honestly, i just need tips on how to get her off my mind, since this crush won’t go anywhere and will just hurt me in the long run.

This is gonna be long and a bit unorganized so I apologize in advance, just felt the need to get it out somewhere. I’ve recently become aware of the fact I might have been lesbian the entire 20 years of my life but have even completely unaware of it. But I feel like the fact I’ve been in relationships with men in the distant past and have been physically attracted to them (although that’s all the attraction was, just physical AND took a huge friendship bond, but not much romantic depth to the relationships really), I feel like I just can’t call myself a lesbian!! I always knew that I admired girls a lot, and I’m personally a huge fan of girly things: pink stuff, doing my nails, dressing up, all that. On average, I found women so beautiful and pretty compared to men. It was just something about their hair, the way they dress, makeup, etc, that draws me in way more than men. I don’t mean to sound offensive when I say this lol, but I just don’t see the appeal in men in general.. But then I felt like I couldn’t exactly relate to my friends who are bisexual or lesbian in that I sometimes struggle to feel primary attraction unless that person is exactly my “type.” I feel like my type is kind of a shallow one too, beefy feminine women (think Monica Granda). I feel like the fact that I don’t like tons of women like they do, it makes me shallow and bad. But when I do see these type of women, I feel all sorts of things and want to be with them, marry them, all of that!! I just don’t know how to come to terms with my identity truly, and if I even am one of you guys 😭 I’m only 20 years old and still have my entire life ahead of me to figure out my sexuality, but I just feel like a fraud sometimes and had to get it out there, thanks to whoever read this

We just stayed at her place for a few hours, and I liked her and really wanted to see her again. But the next day she just apologized for leaving early (bc her friend was having a crisis), and I apologized for being too shy (I regret that), and then we didn't talk anymore. If she wanted to continue this she would have answered my last message, wouldn't she? Or should I try to ask her out?

I'm a trans girl and I'm writing a character who's a lesbian but is very much in denial of her identity due to her upbringing.

This character has wished "a trans girl" friend who at the time she seen her as a boy, was a girl. But she doesn't like those thoughts as it goes against the beliefs she was taught. Sorry if that was a bit confusing but,

My question is have any of you wished a friend who's a boy was a girl? I know the inverse happens and is heartbreaking to hear, but have any of you built a good connection with a boy and wished you were attracted to them romantically, sexually, or whatever but just can't unless they were a girl? Sorry if this question is insensitive please tell me if it is or if am I being problematic, I just want my story to be realistic, thank you ^^^

Just asked one question the other day but I'm back again because I've just been so happy with her that I haven't really had any sexual thoughts at all since talking to her and getting with her

We haven't had much if any conversations in that regard even but I feel like it'd be disloyal to masturbate at all? I'm so new to this whole thing and I'm so in love but I don't feel aroused by anything other than things she says to me.,,

I’ve been dating my partner for awhile now and me and her are both out to our families and friends. I’ve met her parents and everything but one time when we were in public she called me her “friend”. This happened a few weeks ago and I’m still hung up on it. The person was our driver so they were stranger but I still don’t see the reason why she would call me her “friend”. We’re not ashamed of public PDA and showing affection so why refer to me as a “friend” to an uber driver. I don’t know why to bring it up either because I hate confrontation. But I was wondering is any other lesbians do this. I could understand if you weren’t out or cared about public perception but we don’t, or that’s what I thought.