What are some good sites to meet other bi women… not trying to be unicorn or look for a unicorn. Maybe just spark a friendship and see where it goes? Ive always been bicurious but always too shy to make a move. I should also add that I am married and would like to see if there is anyone else here that has gone through this, did you tell your husband, how did he react?

i think i’m bi. for context, i (23F) was raised pretty strict evangelical upbringing. my dad is a pastor, and i have had to live my life in consideration of my dad as a pastor (ie: “what will the church think, your dad won’t be too happy about that, etc). so, i never questioned my gender or sexuality because i was frankly afraid of what i would find.

all of my friends (who are queer) have always been shocked that i was straight. it’s been a joke basically my whole life. now, after a year or two in therapy deconstructing my childhood and my relationship with my parents, i think i am queer, specifically bi.

i have a wonderful and loving partner (25M) who is bisexual, and he often makes jokes about me being straight. it’s beginning to sting, but i don’t know how to be like “actually, i think i am queer”.

all of my friends would be super supportive. my partner would be so great about it; i don’t know why i’m nervous. help??

Am I wigging out on this? I’m a bi woman too.

I’m fine with women using them for strictly WLW arrangements if they’re upfront about being poly. I just think it’s not great to use it to arrange sex with men when it’s the one safe space for lesbians and sapphics who aren’t after that.

Edit: told im biphobic. Typo in title

TLDR: Is it the bi-cycle or am I really just over dating men at this point ?

I (27F) realized I was into women a few years ago and have been identifying as bisexual for a while. But, I pretty recently decided that dating cis-men just isn't for me anymore. My years of being mostly uninterested in a serious relationship and just the general way that men are socialized to be just are not attractive to me anymore - and I'm honestly questioning if it ever was.

However, I feel like I'm seeing for the first time from like an outside perspective just how much dating cis-men has thrown me and my friends just like off our shit. I'm talking relationships with childish, shitty men, to even first dates with men and just hoping it turns into something serious when there are pretty clear signs that this person is not at all being intentional, but we for some reason still hope that maybe they are ? Or even worse, sit in confusion wondering if they're interested in us, or why haven't they followed up with the next date, etc. ? And it's like we don't even know enough about them to know if they'd even be a good friend, let alone a good boyfriend/partner ??

And obviously I was doing all of this same stuff so I am not judging at all. But it takes everything in me now to not just be straight up with my friends, like this man is not for you if he can't even take the time to text you back.

Anyways, all that to say, the minute I realized that I actually DON'T like dating men, and said "Hey, how about I just stop dating them" it was literally like a huge weight off my shoulders. I've been so at peace. In all honesty, I've been taking a break from dating period but have matched with a few women on dating apps as of recent and am excited to go on a few dates soon.

But I don't miss a thing about even matching with guys on dating apps. I still have guys try to flirt with me or date me or ask me out, and I just say no every time lol It's funny because when I was in high school I honestly wasn't all that interested in guys outside of just being friends. And even as an adult, I've never really liked romantic relationship dynamics between men and women anyways. But as of recent, I've been able to focus so much more on myself, my hobbies and passions. I really would like my straight friends to try just taking a break from dating men, even if just for a couple of months and just letting themselves be by themselves. I don't know if this is just working for me because I'm a dismissive avoidant and possibly a lesbian, but it still just seems like a beneficial practice.

That's all, just came on here to get my thoughts on this out. It's also possible that I feel completely different 2 months from now because bi-cycle. Please do not take me or any bisexual seriously in this life.

Each year between November 13 – 19, people and organizations around the [world] participate in Transgender Awareness Week to help increase understanding about transgender people and the issues members of the community face.

Trans Awareness Week takes place the week before Transgender Day of Remembrance on November 20. Transgender Day of Remembrance (TDOR), is an annual observance on November 20 that honors the memory of the transgender people whose lives were lost in acts of anti-transgender violence that year 🕯

Source: https://glaad.org/transweek/

bisexuals of reddit, I'll get straight to the point. 18-year old girl that has just started college. I've been considering myself bi for at least 3 years now, and I've avoided questioning that for majority of that time tbh. For the past few months or more I'm constantly met with one question "lesbian with comp het or just a bisexual with a strong preference for women?". I've avoided coming to a conclusion each and every time I think about that, just as I've avoided making this post. Facing the truth kind of feels scary, although I can't pinpoint what exactly I'm afraid of. I was always the person people told was boy crazy. And I have liked many boys, though all of them are either celebrity crushes or realistically unattainable. And even if they do end up liking me, the moment they express that I get the ick. I haven't had a girl crush like me back yet, so I can't say for sure that won't happen with a girl too, but all of the girls I've liked are much more attainable(?). Girl best friends or women I can strike up a conversation with. I'd say that liking a girl is a totally different experience in general. It feels all warm inside, makes your heart skip a beat, and gives you a weird sense of nervousness, the blushing, getting-shy-out-of-nowhere type of nervousness. And no matter how hard I keep saying "no I must have felt this way about a guy too" I just can't think of any moments that have made me feel like this about a boy. The only type of nervousness around boy crushes i had that i can vividly recall is the one about how people would perceive me if I was out with them, pda and stuff or just you know, standing next to them. Some times (a lot of times) just the thought of being romantically associated with a guy to others makes me want to rip my skin off, and I can't understand that. Because it feels like my whole life I've been fantasizing about that Disney type of relationship with a man. And suddenly I can only see myself getting physical with one, but spending time with them? in a relationship? Just seems like a waste of my time. Of course that does not apply to women, I can see myself wanting one physically, romantically and generally in every way a long lasting relationship would need. It just feels right. BEING with a guy, feels wrong in every way other than the making-out one. But identifying as a lesbian also feels wrong. It's just that liking guys feels so forced but liking women has always felt so genuine and way more sincere. I can't think of any example where I've liked a woman simply because I thought that being with her would make me seem cooler, wanted. Yet this is exactly how I choose what man to like. Choose because it always felt like a conscious choice rather than one the "heart makes" iykwim. What I want to say is that identifying as a lesbian makes me feel like a poser(?). With how often I talk about male celebrity crushes or with the way I talk about wanting men physically and as nothing more. Cause i do in fact want men sexually, im not just okay with that, it more so feels like a need to be with one, just sexually, not romantically. Overall being bi and just wanting women feels a lot safer to me and I guess that's why I've been holding onto that term for forever. So comp het or just bisexual with a preference?

Honestly, while in the past I have certainly met women of whom I've questioned were "actually" attracted to women or not, upon some reflection and listening to some people claiming the same things something clicked for me.

Are we really seeing an overabundance of "fake bisexuals" or are a vast majority of these cases actual bisexual women who are struggling with internalized misogyny and/or homophobia, both of which are practically omnipresent in reality? Especially when these women kiss women, do it more than once, express interest in other women, and even get into relationships with them -- repeatedly -- but seemingly in ways that appear to be "for men" or "for attention"... even when they are literally doing and saying things that are clearly not straight over and over again. What about we question if these women are "actually straight" when they try to pass off kissing girls as just some sort of ploy to attract a man they don't end up with anyways?

Comparatively, I almost never hear of bisexual men having their attraction to men questioned, even if they're more on the hesitant side when it comes to long-term and/or sexual relationships with them. On the other hand, any expression of sexuality (or lack thereof) by women that is not directed towards men is constantly put into question, or denied entirely. The only group allowed to undeniably be attracted to women is heterosexual men.

My point being: I think the finger pointing of "fake bisexuals" overwhelmingly being directed towards bisexual women is simply another example of the misogyny surrounding female sexuality. Bisexual women are in a unique position in which they are women who experience misogyny, and are also not monosexual, which leads to their sexuality being interpreted as, ultimately, a "choice" by many.

Not only is the bisexual woman hampered in understanding, exploring, and accepting her sexuality by misogyny, but her illusion of "choice" makes her fit to be demonized for whatever partner she ends up having. If she ends up with a woman, she is in an imperfect and incomplete woman, and she will certainly regret her choice and end up with a man later. If she ends up with a man, she is a liar, she was never attracted to women, she has chosen to subjugate herself. In either case, she is punished for being a woman with what is perceived to be a choice.

(Though, as a side-note, this does not mean bisexual women are absolved of poor behavior, misogyny, or homophobia. I'm only pointing out how misogyny, and likely a bit of homophobia, plays a role in making it more difficult for bisexual women to figure out their bisexuality, and how misogynistic biases and perceptions -- from both men and women, straight, gay, or bi -- play a role in how often bisexuality is downplayed or denied in bisexual women by others.)

Hi all!

I have been trying to find any books with a bisexual lead or main character and I’m not having great luck. If you have any recommendations please share!

Edit: will also accept bisexual music 🫶🏻

Come Join the Bi+ Women’s Happy Hour Discord! We are an 18+ progressive, diverse and active server where Bi+ women can find community, support, and just be ourselves. We talk about the difficult stuff, but also have spaces to chat about the things we love, from arts and crafts to our pets to video games. Our trans and nonbinary sisters are also welcome! This is not a server for cis men.

(Note: when you join, you’ll get a welcome message with a link to a submission form. It’s 3 simple questions that you will need to fill out and submit. This helps us keep the server more secure.)

https://discord.gg/xRQCxxxbEy

Welcome to r/BiWomen's weekly megathread. Talk about anything and everything!

While conversation topics can deviate from bisexuality, make sure to familiarise yourself with and follow rules 1 through to 5.

Thank you and enjoy! ♡

I've been out to most people for about 6 years now and have found genuinely supportive friends who make me feel comfortable with myself and very loved. However, I struggle with low self esteem and when my mental health gets poor, I stop experiencing attraction which is what I'm going through now. Lately I've been obessively thinking about it though and questioning whether I've ever been attracted to anyone.

I've dated and had genuine feelings for both men and women. I know that I'm bisexual but I feel like a fraud and a liar.

Any advice from someone else that experiences this?

I follow this page but I’m too embarrassed to use my real account.

I’m a 25 yr old black women and I started dating and had my first kiss at 22. It was I really weird time for me and initially only dated/slept with men I wasn’t even attracted to but still wanted to feel affection and now I’m left with a ton of traumatic experiences due to emotional abuse and over bad dating experiences as well as sexual.

After being cheated on by my last bf this January and giving him chances STILL to do better, it didn’t work obviously and I ended things. Now I’m single and I have gone on a single date with a girl (she wasn’t interested and I got ghosted afterwards) I’m know in mindset that I’m “dirty” and “used up” by the men I’ve involved myself with…can I recover from this? I’ve feel unwanted and it’s hard because I know I shouldn’t strive for companionship but it hurts to think my body count and the fact I’ve only been with men could be seen as red flags or as a reason I shouldn’t pursue women in the future(or anyone at all)

If it’s important the number of men is 9. I hate myself everyday for it but keep it to myself, no one knows this.

I guess I want to know if it’s possible for things to get better, I’m not that pretty and have been used by people because im nice and accepting of others. Or should I just stop letting my feelings get hurt?

Hi ! I’m not a butch. I’m not a femme. I’m not a lipstick. I’m not a butch. Can I just be a hybrid? I don’t know what to say when asked “ what I am” I’m me… I can dress up. I play and watch sports . I feel pressure to find and identity . I feel lost and really hope I’m not alone.

hello! lesbian entering your space (i dont really know how to tag this?). I recently saw a lowkey biphobic post i did not agree with and it got me thinking about a lot of stuff. 1) that person really sucked and 2) how far I think i came. I don't really want to get into the meat of it because I'm here to give yall some love but Tiktok really threw me into a what i will admit now biphobic hole. some creators just made me really angry for no reason, i have no romantic experience with bi women so i was drawing on and believing stuff they were saying and it fucked me up for a while. I was a dumbass.

anyways onto the love. this sub and the main bi sub really connected me to actual bi people and I attribute this for getting me out of that hole. I have a long way to go, ill admit I still get hung up on some stupid stuff. give me your favorite bi (women) creators please!! or articles and studies on bisexuality. I don't want yall to do all the work for me maybe just some examples of really good information someone like me has to read! if I have the opportunity to date a bi woman in the future I don't want to have these feelings in my heart anymore. I would feel actually awful projecting this onto her.

all in all thank you guys so much for existing (?) and sharing your experiences on reddit. I feel like a much better woman lover.

p.s. frogs are cool, but I still don't understand the lemon bar thing?

Hi everyone! I’m a 22 bisexual baby gay woman and I need advice. Some context: I’ve known I was bisexual since I was around 7 (thank you Megan fox from transformers) , but have always mainly dated men. I took a break from dating for a while and recently decided I was ready to go back into the dating world again. This time I wanted to completely stay away from men bc they basically repulse me now and I just want to be with women. I went out on my very first date with a woman the other night and I had such an incredible amount of fun. I was super nervous but I think it worked out in the end. However, I started doing some research (TikTok) and now I’m second guessing everything and I have questions. Please please please help me out and answering the following. Thank you!

1. How do I flirt with women?

2. How do I compliment a girl without sounding like I’m friend zoning them? (I.e. do I call them beautiful? Etc.)

3. When and how should I ask them on the second date? (Especially if they asked for the first date?)

4. How can I tell if I’m getting friend zoned?

5. Is double texting okay???

This is all I could think of as of right now but if you have any other tips or advice please help me out. Thank you!!! <3

My name is Lauren (@poppylaur on TT, u/hi.poppylaur on IG) and my girlfriend, Alyssa (@alysswilldiss on TT, u/alyssafunnyofficial on IG) and I have created a sapphic vampire romcom web series called Pain in the Neck! 

To survive the apocalypse, a melodramatic human finds herself under the protection of a goofy (kind of cute, but annoying) vampire.

When we meet our two main characters, it’s 34 days into the zombie apocalypse and Ruby, the human, is sick of being trapped in the house with her vampire roommate, Helena. Helena feeds on Ruby because there are no other humans around, and in exchange, Helena protects Ruby from zombies and fetches her cans of Spam. They constantly bicker because Helena is an ancient vampire stuck in her ways and Ruby… is an actress. The longer they spend together, the more they realize that maybe being stuck with each other isn’t so bad. That’s right- we’re talking an enemies to friends to lovers arc!

It's a goofy, campy show where the sapphic romance is front and center. Think What We Do In The Shadows meets Glee (with less music) meets Carmilla. It's a survival story for characters, but in the end, all they really need to survive is each other. And for once, none of the gay characters die because one of them is already dead! 

We’re currently fundraising on Kickstarter if you wanna check it out! And if you’d like to donate, we’d love you forever. If you can’t donate, sharing the campaign on your socials is still fang-tastic! (We legally had to do at least one vampire pun.) 

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/2111188505/pain-in-the-neck-a-sapphic-vampire-romcom-web-series?ref=user_menu

i love women but i always freeze up trying to talk to them 😭 probably because im so nervous to mess up. i wanna seem cool and i want girls to like me. i can talk to a guy about whatever but as soon as a pretty girl is near me i freeze and turn bright red 😅 anyone get like this?

I (37f) guess I don’t even know where to begin. I love him (37m), we are happy, and I don’t think he would be surprised if I came out as bi. I don’t want him to think I’m leaving him or want to explore my sexuality. I just want to be out as bisexual and be married to my husband.

Should I make it a serious conversation? Maybe as a joke? Because I’m leaning towards as a joke…

Thanks, strangers on the internet 🫶🏻

At the risk of sounding incredibly dramatic, I'll be honest and warn, I'm really not being dramatic. I realized I was interested in women many years ago but was in a wonderful relationship with a man. I didn't want to end it but could no longer avoid it and we split up amicably, although it was very painful. I entered into a relationship with a girl some time after. Although it was not perfect by any means and there were many red flags, I fell absolutely head over heels. She ended things and for so many reasons, this has rocked me. It's been about a month and a half and it wasn't the first time she ends things. I thought we would really give it a fighting chance this second time and, blindedsided may be a strong word but I was somewhat blindsided as things had been going much better and it was so romantic and sweet. One bad week and - well, I digress.

One of the biggest things I find tearing me up is the idea of ever being physical with another woman again. It brings me to immediate tears and I can't imagine ever feeling this way or being so intimate with another woman let alone person again. Perhaps for some of you reading it may seem silly or foolish given a difference in experience - this was my first and I came out later, 30s. This doesn't feel like breaking up with a man and knowing, no matter how much it hurts, that "there will be others." I regret ever falling into this call in my heart to follow this pull in my identity because this has hurt me in such a painful and specific, inconsolable way. I almost hate myself for ever letting me implode my own life just to now wonder if I could ever see another person, man/woman, this way again.

On top of that, I live in an area with no real queer community. My whole identity is tied to her and even hearing about other queer women in a casual setting stings. It's like she owns my queerness because I have no other grounding for it.

I worry for that reason I'll never truly be able to get over her or this and it makes me mad, because she couldn't care less (or just feels bad for herself). She doesn't deserve this much of me but I just don't know if or how I'll get over this or be able to see another person or woman the same way. I wish I'd never admitted this to myself. I just wish I could go back.

Welcome to r/BiWomen's weekly megathread. Talk about anything and everything!

While conversation topics can deviate from bisexuality, make sure to familiarise yourself with and follow rules 1 through to 5.

Thank you and enjoy! ♡

Hello I'm new to posting in general so sorry for some of the awkwardness in this post. I think i just need somewhere to vent while also remaining anonymous.

I recently over the past year discovered that im bisexual at the age of 26. Late bloomer...ik. I had wondered if I was attracted to women since high school but just figured that maybe I just liked the idea. I also don't develop crushes very easily and while I appreciate people aesthetically all the time, I have a hard time being attracted to people beyond that in general.

In the last year and a half however, I've met this girl. Found her very attractive off the bat but wasn't sure in what way until we started to get to know each other more and became more friendly. I don't wanna give too much context bc I get paranoid but we've since become close friends and are now roommates. For a while I (stupidly) mistakenly assumed that she perhaps liked girls as well. She has an androgynous appearance, both with the way she dresses, her mannerisms, presents herself, etc...(for context many ppl that know her also assumed the same so I'm def not the only one) but learned about halfway through our friendship so far that she's "mostly straight."

I did eventually come clean to her a couple weeks ago, after a few months of living together because we had been spending so much time with each other and getting even closer (besides sexual intimacy lol). She started to become really important to me so i was scared that telling her might weird her out but I felt like I needed to in order to move on. I knew she didn't like me like that logically but emotionally I was having a hard time letting go of that hope. I tried to tell her in a way that she wouldn't feel any pressure. She reciprocated that she didnt want to compromise our friendship. I also have asked her multiple times since if she's ever uncomfortable with me now and she assures me she's not. So we're still close and get along just fine and are goofy and silly and even still affectionate platonically. And yet I feel utterly like shit lately.

I guess what im going through is heartbreak right now. I've made attempts to date outside of this and look elsewhere and keep my mind off her. but I'm having a hard time with it and also just don't feel right about using that method since since 1) I feel like I'm using ppl and 2) none of them look or act or are HER lmfaoo.. I feel crazy, ashamed, undesirable and pathetic. I know I should just accept it and enjoy my close friendship with her but it's been so hard on me emotionally, even though I know I'm important to her as well. I see people say that maybe distancing yourself may work but that's kind of impossible for me right now since we live together and I just enjoy my time too much when I'm with her.. I dislike the idea of doing that 😭🤣 Lately I've been trying to focus that care I have for her into being a good supportive person in her life but it's still hard for me to not feel overcome by pain and sadness as well.

I'm not sure what else to say. I just wonder if others have any similar experiences to mine, especially in the emotional sense. I find myself crying more often and being more insecure about myself and frustrated. I don't think I've ever liked someone in this way before, man or woman so I'm not entirely sure if I'm being unreasonable or weird about it.

Thank you if you read this

And you can get access to Disney+, I’m really enjoying the female power and f4f coding in the show. Cheers.

Reclaim your own power! Advocate! Donate! Organize!

EDIT: I forgot to include the name of the show (lol). Agatha All Along. Also, worth noting that the coding doesn’t stay coding for long. Still Disney, so it’s all PG!

Especially if your state hasn't protected the right to abortion. If they see you missed a period and then went out of state they might know why! Also it's important to note that cops don't need a warrant to go through your phone if it's unlocked! So if you're going to a protest and have to bring your phone, make sure to turn off fingerprint/face ID because they can't make you tell them your password.

You can guess what this is about. It's just infuriating and terrifying. I am already a mixed race latina of a immigrant family, but ya girl decided to sprinkle some queer on top. But I refuse to hide myself. We shouldn't have to. We should be allowed to be who we are. We should be allowed to be with her people we love. We should be able to have the final say on our own bodies.

Keep being yourself and keep fighting. All I wanted to do was look at pretty girls and flirt a little, but it's never that easy is it.