Anyone else feeling lonely this time of year? I hate it and feel like such a dam burden when I try to hang out or even talk to mates,

The issue is I’m not sure, I’m a lesbian and he is a straight man from what I know . I just feel the ick but I could be wrong but I’m in a dnd group and I don’t know what to do well I should start with why I think he likes me.

-he told me and Bri (bestie) that we know who he likes we only know people from our old job and dnd group mutually

-he kept be around me and hovering while he was drunk

-called me a gazelle while drunk after play and truth or drink game keep in mind I’m short stubby everyone else said mouse which is accurate to me my whole life my family calls me mouse

-before I left he said since he is drunk he might text me and to keep in mind he is drunk

My friend said she hopes he doesn’t because I’m a lesbian but the other girl in the group is also a lesbian and she has a bf so idk

Convince me otherwise...or don't. I just miss being in a relationship. I miss being head over heels.

Listening to Gracie Abrams and reminiscing everything that had happened in the past year.

(Will delete this soon)

I'm worried it's taking me too long to get hot and I won't be able to have a girlfriend because of it.

I'm still chubby and have issues with my appearance and I'm upset bc if there's always someone better than me why would anyone wanna be with me instead of them

But it's not like I can be better than someone else bc that's not how it works? But I can't be someone's first choice if everyone else is so beautiful and I'm happy for them for that but I'm sad that it's probably gonna take too long to happen and then it never will

Sorry if this makes no sense or comes off desperate I'm a lil high rn idk

Ignore the glitter 😂😂I do nails and Christmas is coming up

I’m in a bit of shock right now and I’m not sure if my reaction is unreasonable. I’ve been on multiple dates (about 5 spread out since mid Oct) with this nice girl from Hinge, and we had another date planned for this weekend. I’m someone who usually takes a while to develop romantic feelings and kiss, be touchy, etc. however on the third date she initiated a kiss and I enjoyed it- so every date since we have usually kissed. Last date she invited me to stay over at her place and we kissed/cuddled quite a bit, and i thought it was lovely. She was definitely the initiator with a lot of the touching and kissing. I wasn’t 100% sold on our total compatibility but thought we were getting to know each other and enjoy each others company.

However, she told me today that after giving it some thought she hasn’t developed romantic feelings, and cancelled what would have been our 6th date. It hit me harder than I thought it would, as I thought we were just starting to develop something and felt we interacted quite intimately on the date prior. Am I just being prudish by thinking all that contact and time spent indicated potential romantic feelings on her end? I’m feeling a bit led on but that might just be my naivety.

The country, not the state.

Super long shot, will be surprised if anyone is actually Georgian 🇬🇪 in this group

So gay. That’s all

I realised I was only into girls when I was about 15, but have known I’m interested in girls since I was probably 7 or so. In between those ages I guess I was struggling with micro labelling myself and comphet, as well as general hormonal teen years and anxiety.

In high school I wasn’t exactly ashamed of my sexuality, but because I went to a very tiny school (maybe 100 students max, with 11 people in my class), where a majority of the students are Muslim, I wasn’t exactly “out and proud” either. If someone asked me what I thought about a guy I’d give some vague answer without completely agreeing with them that he was cute or hot or whatever. My family knows that I’m gay, and have been supportive, so there’s no trouble there.

Now, when I’m in uni, in a bigger city, at a university with thousands of students, I’ve stopped caring as much about coming out. The friends I’ve made knew I was gay basically straight away cuz I told them very early into our friendship, because I just cannot handle holding myself in the closet anymore.

I live in a progressive country, but I still feel completely isolated and alone in my identity. Two of my friends are bisexual, but haven’t had any experiences or I guess “real” relationships on girls, which doesn’t invalidate their sexuality obviously but it makes me feel more alone because i can’t like talk about girls I find cute or whatever like they can talk about boys with our straight friends.

The shame comes from the fact that i desperately just want to fit in, and not feel so alone with my identity. I know statistically speaking that there’s other gay people at school, but I still feel completely alone. Like all my friends can gush about how hot a guy is and I just can’t relate and that makes me feel so alone. One of my friends is really sweet and says that she understands and that I can tell her anything about anyone, which I really really appreciate, but it still feels shitty because I know she’ll never actually be able to relate yknow?

The fact that I’m a total virgin and is incredibly shy doesn’t help either. Like I know I’m only 19 and there’s plenty of time left but all of my friends have had boyfriends and sex and stuff or whatever and I haven’t even held a girl’s hand. The only “relationship” I’ve had was over the internet and was kinda very shitty.

This post was probably just a super long ramble, I just wanted to get this off my chest.

Apologies people, I did not upload this Saturday’s thread, really sorry about that!Something came up :\ I shall do it this Sunday evening at 8pm (uk time) Thanks for reading 💗

I 17[F] have been with my gf 18[F] for 10 months. And I really love her but I can’t stop hurting her, never on purpose of course, but I’m so careless idk what to do.

It started with me not responding to her snaps enough. It’s worth noting imo, that these snaps are often photos with not text, like streaks. So I sorted that out. Then it was me going online and not replying to her, so I tried to fix that but apparently it still happens (I can never recall going online and ignoring her so idek how else to fix this) And she was mad when I went to sleep too early at sleepovers (any time before 1:30am) and gets mad if I sleep around her because it means I don’t want to spend time with her, according to her. She was mad when I forgot to text good morning and night so now I do that every night and morning, it just took a while to become habit.

Lately I’ve been so incredibly busy with college, preparing for Oxford interviews, being ill with possibly lymes disease, and just having a lot on my plate. We hadn’t seen eachother in a while so I skipped a class the other day to hang out because it had been too long.

Today was her 18th. I’ve been making her present all week. I made her a coloring in book, and an advent calendar with chocolate and a note in every day with a reason why I love her. I also pressed flowers, got her baileys, a personalized mug with a design I drew, and some other stuff. I couldn’t see her today bc she was doing stuff with family.

I was finishing off present stuff after work today and then I was exhausted and went to go to sleep and she text me, drunk, pissed I hadn’t made her a birthday story on Instagram. How the fuck did I forget that?! I feel so shitty because I feel like no matter what I do I’m hurting her. I also forgot my friends birthday story the other week (i put off ever doing stories for this reason but I started this year). Every time I think we are doing well, I fuck up. Am I incapable of loving someone properly? I know I love her but why am I not doing it right? Other people don’t struggle to remember this stuff. I try to explain that I really don’t mean to do any of this and I do love her and I think about her so much but it seems it’s never enough. I just feel like a horrible person and I know it’s so cliche but she really does deserve better than someone like me.

Despite generally considering myself some shade of ace I’ve got a crush a girl and I truly don’t know how to feel beyond giggling and kicking my feet.

For context we’re both in the same college program and though we’ve been aware of each other for a while she’s only recently joined our little “friend group.” And we just click, like week two we spent an hour and a half chatting after class and the time went by so fast.

I’m open about being gay and we were talking about her crumbling relationship with her boyfriend. She very quickly came out to me as bi to which I very maturely responded too while only squealing internally. I am otherwise surrounded by straight people. 🥲

Anyway, the following week she’s split with her boyfriend on good terms, the relationship was just becoming a chore for them apparently. So we are updating our other friends on her situation and she sums up everything by saying “so yeah, he’s just not the person I want at my side right now,” and then turns to make direct eye contact with me.

I know eye contact is a normal part of conversations but also she said that and then stared into my soul and my poor little heart could barely take it.

Also, she has tattoos and I have to stop myself from staring every time she stretches or takes off her hoodie.

I’m trying to take things slow because I’m often deeply affected by new person fixation and because I know she’s dealt with a lot of drama this year and is “trying to focus on herself.” But also she’s gorgeous and I just really hope she wants to be my friend in the new year when we won’t be taking courses together. 😭

And maybe like idk maybe kiss and stuff too.

I am not used to feeling out of control like this and I am struggling.

I have had a crush on this girl all year but we don’t know each other super well/cross paths that much, so I’m always looking for excuses to talk to her. She sent me a meme this morning which was cute but I didn’t really respond other than a heart react, and I want to keep the conversation going. Is it cringe to tell her she was in my dream last night?

Just curious, can’t find many of us out in the wild

Was at an Xmas ice skating event and was taking pics with my sisters when a cute lesbian couple asked us to take pics. I said "are you guys a couple?" And trey said "yes" (looking a bit concerned) And I said "omg I love that !" (Why did I say that 🤦‍♀️) And they looked like 😬 at each other Then I said wuh luh wuh and they giggled I think (thank god)

I'm a baby gay lesbian trying to make queer friends but I feel like I came off like a person pointing at zoo animals 😭 I'm so sorry

Do you guys normally say anything when you see fellow gays in the wild ?

I blocked her on everything after the election but she managed to reach me through Zelle lol, any good transgender charities I could send the money to? I don’t want her to have anything to hold over me

What does this phrase mean? Could that be in a gay way? I was seriously touched (it felt like she said it quietly and intensely). Yet I don’t know if a lot of people say that in regards to just anyone.

So I am extremely fortunate to be in a liberal bubble in which 99% of my family and friends are liberal. I just have this one friend. She was my best friend in high school and we don’t talk a ton anymore but she still lives in my hometown and I live in another state but I work remotely so I go to stay with my family in my hometown a lot and she is really my only friend that is still there. Unfortunately she has always been pretty apolitical, in a willfully ignorant way in my opinion. She avoids political topics like it’s her job. The thing is she is very supportive of me being gay and I think if she actually took the time to learn she would lean liberal. She was absolutely flabbergasted that her last boyfriend turned out to be homophobic. She couldn’t believe he was homophobic “because he’s a Christian.” I don’t understand how far your had has to be buried in the sand for you to not know a lot of Christian’s are homophobic but she didn’t grow up going to church and only somewhat recently started attended the church I grew up going to which is actually very liberal. But unfortunately her family is pretty conservative (though I think her mom is really similar to her, gay-friendly but brought up conservatively and stays out of politics). And she now has had a new bf for about a year, and she has started going to his church, which is also Lutheran, as is the church she was going to. However it’s a different branch of Lutheran that is not officially accepting of gay people. I don’t think she realizes that, and I haven’t been sure how or if I should bring it up.

So basically here’s my issue now. I came back to my hometown right before the election and leading up to that she kept asking me when I was coming back and when I said I was back she said we should hang out that week. I didn’t respond because I was worried about how the election would turn out. Sure enough it turned out poorly and I did not want to see her because I’m scared of how she and/or her bf voted and am afraid of confrontation/conflict. Then I was posting a lot of stuff on my story, including stuff about how I didn’t want to be friends with people who voted for Trump. She didn’t contact me at all after that so I assumed that was my answer. Well all the sudden the other day she texted that we should go see Moana this week. I didn’t respond and the next day she messaged again, and when I still didn’t respond she called and left a voicemail. I feel bad ignoring her but I just don’t know how to move forward. I was planning on writing a letter to just get my feelings out and maybe send it to her, maybe not. But now she keeps trying to get ahold of me I’m stressed and feel like I need to say something now. My mom thinks I should just have a “don’t ask don’t tell” policy with her, but I just don’t know if I can do that anymore after this election. I also know she wants to get married soon and I would at least be invited to her wedding, if not asked to be a bridesmaid, and I don’t think I can stomach that if she’s marrying a conservative. But I’m also scared to tell her that, even though we haven’t been super close in a long time, she is so man-centered and determined to get married and have kids, I am 99.9% certain she would choose him anyways. I am just so at a loss for how to handle this. I wish I would’ve talked her about stuff before the election but unfortunately I am absolutely petrified of confrontation and just hoped she would learn stuff from everything I was positing on my stories, which I realize is dumb as hell but it was all I could get myself to do. Anyways, I guess I’m asking, what do I do? 😭

TL;DR Been seeing a girl I like a lot and can see myself seriously dating but she wants to call it quits before it starts due to a lot of future fear

Hello! I (30) have been seeing a girl (26) for about a month and a half (not exclusive yet but eventually would like to be) I'm almost 4 months out of a LONG term relationship and she's in a different country for the next 3 months for work and hasn't been in a relationship before. We've talked about waiting to make things exclusive and talk about something more serious until she gets back but have been getting very close in the meantime. Yesterday she talked to me about wanting space because of her conflicting feelings. I.e she likes me a lot but isn't sure what we're doing if neither of us are ready for a serious relationship. For me, I'm enjoying getting to know her, being flirty and fun, and seeing how that evolves.

She recently brought up concerns about how she's away for work often (sometimes up to 10 months at a time). I was a bit taken aback because I thought it was closer to 6 (more manageable for me) and seems to be in a bit of an overthinking spiral. I haven't gotten to say my piece about it yet. We talked a bit last night and she feels some space to clear her head would be good and will be talking some more tonight to better define that. I'm a space advocate so I'm happy to provide that even though it hurts

I want to be able to support her while also not losing her to anxiety and thoughts based in fear. I know that isn't in my control and I want her to make the right choice for her but want to give this a fair shot without pressuring her

Is this one of those situations where we just cut contact until we're both in the same country (and city) again? I know no one can answer this for me but if y'all have any advice from a similar experience I'd be very grateful

Again, this may seem like a stupid question

I’m closeted transfem and I’m scared no one will accept me besides those I’m already out to - I think I’ll be closeted for years. I’m also trying to figure out if I’m bi or lesbian (the only men I like are fictional ones so I’m not sure if this is a good indicator) - this does make me feel slightly unwelcome and uncomfortable with being in online woman and queer women communities as on surface level, I’m just a cis guy and I don’t want to feel invasive or at risk of being called a predator or any of the other insults that get thrown to trans people

I know that carabiners are a symbol for lesbians to identify one another yet I don’t know if I can have one as I’m closeted trans. I already have one as I had a hand sanitiser thing that came with one and I kept the carabiner and I’ve also recently bought a keychain for me to put on it but I’m not even sure if it’s okay for me to have one as I’m closeted transbian and (as mentioned earlier) I look nothing like a girl and not in a tomboy way, I just look like a stereotypical 17 y/o boy

Follow up question: is it only for masc lesbians or can femme lesbians also have carabiners? I do know it’s typically a masc thing but I’m not sure if femmes also use them

I recently met a girl that I have a massive crush on, and like I could easily picture us having a long lasting, healthy relationship. She seems to like me back (she did express much appreciation for me and the time together several times) and when we're hanging out I feel great, very mindful and light hearted at the same time, and my energies recharge instead of being consumed.

But we're not together all the time of course. I'm starting to feel the need to channel these feelings somehow, in order to be able to let them express and then go on with the rest of my day, since I don't want my life to revolve around her.

Do you have ways to do it? I know some people - like she does herself - write love songs but I don't have the skills for that haha

Not sure if this question is allowed but it would be fun to make friends in local citys!

Im in Chicago📍

Title says it all.

Trans girl here, been on hrt for years and pass pretty well. (My friends didn’t even know I was trans until I mentioned it off handily)

But I can’t fucking get that feeling out of the back of my head that I’m invading queer spaces ? Despite being a queer woman ??

I just feel like I don’t belong and don’t deserve to call myself a woman or sapphic in any way. (Bisexual)

Whenever I see or meet other queer women I feel so so so much self hatred and like I want to crawl into some corner and like.

Like I’m doing something wrong by simply thinking “oh hey! That’s a cute lesbian couple” (media and irl, arcane did a number on me as you can imagine). Body dysmorphia, low self esteem and (probably) cptsd don’t help either with this.

Idk sry for this incoherent rant, I just needed to vent about this. Maybe someone else can relate