Hey, so I have bangs and a lot of hair in the back and I really like my hair and do not feel the need to shorten it but I want it took look more feminine. Any tips? I have pictures of what it looks like granted these are a month old so I did style them a little more, I’m looking to cut off the side burns but that’s all I got, I also put little charms in them to help boost the energy they give off.

so I don't really know how to explain this or word it it's so confusing and sorry this'll be really rambly but there's things people say have a meaning but I just don't feel like they have that same meaning for me. I would like it if they did but I'm scared of getting it wrong. like sometimes I feel really weird about being a man I don't know how to describe it but it just doesn't feel right to me but then I'm fine later and like there's things I do or am interested in that people say are like "trans coded" but that 1. seems kinda stereotypical (atleast to me idk somethings like wanting to wear feminine clothes and make up and present generally more feminine) but idk if that's judt cus I despise gender norms with a burning passion or if it means something else or both? I genuinely think I might be trans but I just don't know where to start like looking? I guess like how do I found out? I don't really know what om doing and I'm kinda scared of like exploring I always have been I've honestly tried to repress it so much and deny it because I'm scared of like exploring and coming to the conclusion I'm trans then later finding out I'm not and then feeling like I did a big disservice to the trans community okay that might sound how I didn't intend that too what I mean is like I'm not scared of being trans I'm scared of being wrong about being trans because by some very long chain of slightly questionable logic in my brain it feels like it'd be insulting to trans people which is probably js me overthinking it. so I guess just like how and where do I start? what do I do? where do I look? help?

Hi, I wanted to ask and know more about people that transitioned MtF, specifically someone that was very manly, hairy and big. I'm a 23yo Spanish male, rather bulky and hairy, and I thought about making the transition for a couple years now, but I'm also very insecure, I deal with anxiety and depression and even tho it's a complicated subject, I'm usually scared of taking chances if I don't know a general path they might take. I wanted to ask about the experience before making the decision, what made them finally take it, what they went thru during it, what things happens that they weren't expecting, what things they were expecting didn't happens and so on (things you might expect of insecure people like me)

I don't know how to start this so uhm, have fun with the wall of text.

Okay, so long story short, since the 5th I've been questioning my gender due to getting very happy at seeing myself in the skirt and thigh highs, looking in the mirror I felt really giddy. For a few days after that I generally felt a lot happier and started questioning.

Since then, I've been going through a loop of "I'm probably trans, you go girl!" to "I don't have any dysmorphia / I'm perfectly happy as is / am I sure this is what I want?".

Right now I'm in a "yeah I'm just a guy who enjoys crossdressing" period again. I don't know if I'm genuinely feeling gender euphoria when dressing fem/doing makeup, or if I'm just going along and recontextualizing past events and feeling the feelings because they are what I'm supposed to be feeling.

I'm just confused right now, has anyone else had an experience of intense flip-flopping between "I'm not trans, I don't wish I was born as a girl every day, just that being one would be nice and I'm probably just a cis guy" and "Yeah, I'm probably MTF"?

Or has anyone else had felt that they weren't didn't actually want to hit the button (you know, that one), or be a girl, or use female pronouns, and that they were feeling it purely because they were "supposed" to be?

Edit1: anyone knows any places I can experiment with my pronouns?

Edit2: I'll keep doing the "questioning", "confident", "unsure", "excuse" cycle. I'll come back and edit this if it turns out either way. Love yall, good night.

(ask for clarification, I'm really tired right now, maybe tomorrow morning I'll start the cycle again)

Hey there! I'm 18 FTM travelling out of the US to Costa Rica with my family in a few days. I'm out of the closet with them but they don't know I went on T and as of right now I'm not looking to say anything. I've only started about 2 weeks ago, but we will be gone for about 10 ish days. I'm worried about bringing my gel through customs. Some people have said that I need go declare it to the TSA before I get my carry on looked at. Should I leave it at home? Should I put it in my checked luggage? Should I put it in my carry on? The bottle itself is 88 grams.

More than happy to answer questions, most of what I see talks about injections.

Is there a way I can masturbate without getting hard? Getting hard gives me quite a bit of dysphoria. I pretty much have only been using a wand, which feels super nice, but still causes an erection. Not sure if there is anything I can do.

it seems like a lot of transphobes will waste countless hours online trying to get our attention and i dont get why they think waisting their time and energy on people they hate is a good idea

one time i was reading this scifi story where they're (some people/main character) on some alien planet somewhere after they got taken there idk. anyway, there was some ritual where the main character was going to become one of the aliens by eating a bunch of dirt and a plant from their homeworld, and it was like, i wanted that to happen to me more than anything ive ever read about in any story. like i must've reread that part so many times, and then that week i had this really vivid dream where that was happening, but then it kinda merged with a bunch of stuff about the animorphs (children's book series where kids fight aliens by turning into different animals), because i was into that also at the time, and i ended up like half wolf in the dream. i think i told my mom about it and then idk i thought it was somehow gonna be read as trans by her, or like not very imaginative (idk.. she was very hard headed/not nuanced about interpreting what i was asking for, like "oh i understand you completely", but it feels like either she didn't or maybe she did and that i was transphobic or something), and i was frustrated with that interpretation at the time, because i was convinced i just wanted to be the alien in the story and then i could live with them (the aliens) and be separate from all earth related stuff entirely for the rest of my life. but yeah, just an overwhelming amount of wanting to be in a different body, i guess, or like dreaming of being able to be different people when i grew up. like, oh, im not locked in yet, because nobody knows how I'll look as an adult, was a really common thought i used to have. like i was convinced adults were just living out whatever role people expected them to do based on their physical appearance, and they somehow didn't realize it, and that i was the only one with any agency. i just thought people who looked like how they are as a person were just, like, braindead, thoughtless zombies, like they just took the easy way out, somehow.

idk what my question is. i guess:

what do i do with that information/experience? is that a common story?

i ended up kinda going with that i was trans (relatively late in life), and because im amab, that im a trans woman/enby, and there's other indicators there (in terms of gender specific dysmorphia that would make the post too long). on the other hand, it also just feels like this is the only other option, and i would still just choose to be that alien if i could, or possibly some sort of animal like a bird or dolphin, but tbh i don't really think about the non-human stuff anymore, as an adult.

anyway, sorry if this post is too crazy, or i should post this somewhere else/just discuss with my therapist.

thanks

What does Kaiser in the SF Bay area cover through their gender-affirming program (electrolysis, and/or laser; face and/or whole body)? I have dark hair. Thanks!

I go by my chosen name (Jaden) at school with my friends and online (especially when signing up for stuff). However, for the latter, I sometimes need to put in a last name. Does anyone have a chosen last name to go with their first? I don't want to use my actual last name to go with my chosen first name, as it feels a little awkward (for personal and sentimental reasons that I don't want to get into). If so, how did you choose it? I feel like first names are so much easier to pick than last ones. Also, if anybody here has any ideas for a last name to go with Jaden, please let me know. I am genderfluid AMAB.

Hello Everyone,

MTFTMTFTM (on again/off again transwoman) here. So I have been trying to transition, but two issues are stalling that.

1. My wife is not supportive with my transition, I still love my wife and daughter, and getting a divorce is not as fun and easy as they make it look.
2. I'm not sure if it's the trans community having subpar PR, but it looks like a cringe, lonely, and empty life. Plus the optics of it come off as cold and selfish that I abandoned my family for that.

Although transition is something I have wanted, it looks like there are more negatives after putting it through a cost-benefit analysis. It's stuff like that has me frequently cutting off my HRT and sprinting back into the closet. Are there any experiences where someone went through this and came out the other side okay? Thank you all in advance

How much different will you turn out in the end? Especially the face and facial bone structure.

I have a very pronounced brow ridge; it's the thing that gives me the most dysphoria outside of my facial hair, but laser seems to be working well there. I think I would need FFS but the problem is I've always been terrified of being put under for anesthesia. What are some of the alternatives? Could botox work to raise the eyebrows? Or maybe filler injections on the forehead?

i’ve booked an appointment at a planned parenthood location for hrt but on this subreddits pinned post (the google maps every informed consent location thingy), that locations description is said to be “ftm only” which isn’t what im looking for (mtf) could this be a mistake or is it outdated cuz it is 5 years old because in my searching i’ve never heard of this before until now plz help.

I have come to the conclusion that i would be hapier if i had hrt but i dont know how or when to get it.

I live in sweeden where you need a gender dysphoria diagnose to get hrt prescribed. My dysphoria is verry mild so i don’t think i would be elegable to get it. Should i lie and say i’m verry dysphoric to make it more likely to get a hrt prescription.

I have no clue what the best way to approach getting hrt

I'm a 20 years old trans girl (attracted to girls) and soon I will start hrt, but I haven't lost my virginity yet. I feel like I will miss out on "default sex", but I can't wait any longer because gender dysphoria is killing me. It's feels like a lose lose situation, no matter what I chose (wait till I lose virginity or start hrt now) I'm going to miss out on something. Did anyone had a same issue? How can I deal with it?

So I have been thinking how to actually start hrt since I don't know where to start and what to do. Do I go to my regular doctor or something else (btw I'm in Ireland) Any help would be nice (:

Hello - the other night, I made my new name widely public for the first time in both my personal and professional spaces (a few of my friends knew I’d chosen it), slightly on a whim, but more because in some key parts of my life that I don’t have full control over, I’ve been feeling held back (basically a bunch of planned life changes are riding on me securing a better paying full time gig that I’ve been seeking since the fall), so I’ve been taking action wherever I feel like I can. I chose my new name - or I should say, it chose me — back in September, and I have been holding on to it ever since waiting for “the right moment.” (I know there is no such thing). I’ve been identifying as broadly trans and enby, and presenting in a kind of femme expressive way, for a couple of years, and progressing mentally further toward transfemme-ness without being one hundred percent certain where I’ll land yet. I began HRT about one month ago (typical estrogen + spiro combo and amount), and believe it is making me happier. That said, I still occasionally have minor doubt flares, and so one of the ways I reassured myself was by telling myself this name change was something I wanted even if I changed my mind and went back to being a medically unedited theyby. Oh, and I’m 41, lol. My question is this - Since debuting the name, I’ve found myself responding very positively to everyone who tells me how beautiful they think it is, and how well it suits me. But with people who have actually called me by it, or introduced me to others using it, it’s been more hit or miss. With a couple of very close friends - incidentally, the first few I shared it with, it feels lovely. But with most everyone else, I keep feeling this moment of panic when I hear or read it. This morning, I visited my stepdad at his retirement community to reconnect (we were estranged because of some shit my mom did), and he introduced me to probably a couple dozen people with the new name, and it happened every time. I know it’s not because I don’t want it -‘it’s more this feeling of shock and unfamiliarity and exposure and vulnerability and like I somehow haven’t lived into the name or earned it yet. I’ve been somewhat wishing id socialized it longer with a smaller group where I’d hear it on a regular basis from people I completely trust. I’m wondering if any of this resonates with anyone, and if you’ve found any practices that help you own and embody and live into the name.

So today I was thinking about my future as a trans MTF. What would be my first approach to making it legal would it be changing my name first getting prescribed HRT

Apologies if this seems disrespectful or if this is the wrong sub to ask this in. I'm a fanfiction writer who has dealt with gender-nonconforming characters before, but I'm having a hard time finding an accurate way to easily describe this specific character.

The concept is that they are a haunted, sentient Pikachu plush toy. (For those who don't know Pokemon, the gender of a Pikachu can be identified by the shape of its tail) This plush toy was once two separate toys, one male and one female. The main character sews them both together to create one toy, which has both the male and female tails. When I've depicted them in a humanized way, they sometimes speak in unison, or switch between a more masculine or feminine voice.

The word that's been on my mind is "intersex", but (please correct me if I'm wrong) doesn't that have to do with having certain body parts of different sexes? I don't know if that would be the appropriate word to use considering that they're a toy that has a vastly different anatomy to a human's.

Thanks for reading, and thanks for your input in advance!

Every day of waiting, my chances of potentially passing decrease. Unfortunately passing also seems to me, to play a big role in life satisfaction for trans people, mostly for external reasons.

You can kind of say the same thing about just about anything, my chances of being a master at underwater basket weaving decrease every day I don't weave baskets underwater, but I just don't care. So what makes me invested on potentially transitioning and passing, enough so to put effort and time into writing this?

The answer: been there, done that, I don't know and maybe it doesn't matter much anyways. One thing that is certain though is that it's a waste of energy and time to worry about something that you cannot practically change in some way. And boy have I wasted energy and time doing that.

So I need to do one of two things:

a) Stop worrying about it. This seems preferable because it doesn't involve external conflict as much but I have been generally unsuccessful at it, so I want to hear suggestions.

b) Tackle it, be assertive, stop feeling shame, take baby steps into transition. Because maybe I'm also just femme, maybe I crave the estrogen, maybe that's just what I vibe with. Maybe it's worth it.

It's late here so I might take a while to respond.

hello there ✨

[TL;DR] Partner transitioning is mix of emotions I’m trying to make sense of.

• My partner of several years recently came out as Trans (mtf) to me (cisfemale). We’ve both identified as Queer-ish & very comfortable with non-mainstream ways of existing. Overall, I’m just so thrilled to be able to connect more to them bc they’re like actually /there/ and present now. I have so much reverence & respect for the intense journey they’re on getting to know and accept themselves.

Also… my experiences the past few years have been not super easy… 😇🥴… We met during the pandemic, moved in together, opened my own business to cover our finances, and helped them find their own career. I’ve had my own intense medical issues & never felt like I could relax bc I was carrying most of the mental load for us. I love them deeply, and also know we have a tendency to get stuck triggered in emotion loops with each other (trauma/ADHD/ASD,etc.). I’ve basically felt like I was begging them to connect with me in anyway they could & couldn’t ever make sense of the feeling they were pushing me and everyone else away (things that are already improving a lot).

So now I have this weird mixture of relief and resentment to finally have them be /here/ & present emotionally. I’m trying to be authentic about how deeply I love & care for them, and they seem to understand the complexity but also seemed to feel conflicted and guilty. I’m pretty sure this must normal to some extent with a transition, but I was hoping to feel less alone, awful, and crazy. 🙃

Thoughts? Support? Recommendations? I’ll take whatever. Just grateful to be listened to. 🥰

I'm a transfem who's doing 0.35ml injections of 40mg/mL Estradiol Valerate every 7 days. I think that calculates to 14mg per injection. My testosterone levels have been nuked as intended, but my E levels are really high and I don't really have a professional to ask about it right now.

I've read that recommended levels are somewhere around 300-400pg/ml for estrogen in trans women. How bad is it that my latest blood test came back with 1256pg/mL?

I took this test about 3 or 4 days after my injections, is that ok? Am I going to die or have my breast growth decreased lol?

I am a trans male and am starting to wonder if doing it it right or not

Hello. I'm AMAB and in my early 20s. I haven't landed on an exact gender label but it seems to be fem-leaning. My wonderful friend has offered to go with me and help me get my first real bra. I have a couple of sports bras but you know like a real bra with a clasp and real cups and everything. It's just that I'm very nervous about going in to do this. I don't pass at all. I have a manly voice and a wide ribcage and I know nothing about makeup and hair. And I know for a fact I'm going to have to time out getting my chest & body hair under control before I go (unless that actually won't matter? idk). Does anyone have any tips that helped them in this situation? To build up the confidence to actually go? I'm just worried that I'll look/feel very out of place.

(general bra shopping advice is welcome too if you have it)

Basically I have been thinking a lot about wether I'm trans recently, but I'm not very sure about it.
I'm AMAB and have been balding pretty agressively, especially for my age (I'm 25). My hair is my main source of unhapiness about my body, I'm not sure if its dysphoria or not, but either way I hate it, and I want to get a hair transplant eventually.
I'm wondering if the results for male/female hair transplants are very different, because having one now would make me a lot happier but I'm afraid of regretting not getting something like hairline feminization surgery if do transition later down the line.
Or the inverse, if I get a famale hairline and decide to start transitioning in "private", would it look weird while I'm presenting as a guy/have short hair/etc.

MTF have been on hormones for a few months, need to stop for personal reasons. What can I expect?

(note: am trans myself)

What is this?

I encountered this online, but I want to know if this is a real thing or not, or just grifting/lols.

After reading some forum posts and a minor dive into the topic, I am still unconvinced that either the person posting is saying this without actually believing this, to whatever end. Or, that its a poor taste joke and leading people on. (Or, finally, a result of mental illness from whateber caused it - a kind of severe disassociation).

My reasoning: this is the penultimate dehumanizing, and objectification of a person, or one's self. Language constructed around talking about a living, breathing person as if they were an actual object or creature - can or should it be possible for a person, regardless of method, to remove or diminish personhood?

And, is this a step toward that possibility, given the current political climate and language used by major hate groups around the world?

I am trying to have an open mind, and would like to know more perspectives. These are just the points I keep thinking of that have yet to be answered to a satisfying degree, and I keep seeing these pronouns in the wild and - despite practicing as suggested - still feels... Immensely wrong to use; I feel as if I am using a slur or directly insulting them in the worst possible way, and the cognitive dissonance is flooring me.

Edit: regarding the mental illness portion: I did not mean that in a negative fashion. I mean to say that I am and was worried that it was a self-harm tactic and whether or not to enable that behavior if it was - as in certain circumstances this could get me into hot water or even legal issues - especially at my current job where I am a mandated reporter, and, I write reports on my clients as a part of my job.

Hi I am a 14 year old guy, and I want to be a girl. I have told my dad about it but I am afraid to tell others, as my classmates would think I was a freak! I wish I was born as a girl so I wouldn’t have to deal with this. Even if I did tell people I’m pretty sure that they wouldn’t see me as a girl, and later on I would have to deal with this for the rest of my life! I just want people to leave me alone and not have to deal with all of this. I am really scared and I wish that this will go away!

I don't want to be trans. I'm 99% sure that I am. I've come out to my wife, twice, but both times we just kinda forgot about it because they weren't deep conversations and I haven't done anything serious about it after. Now I'm just kinda shaving everything except for my head hair, not using gendered terms for myself as much as possible, and sometimes saying things hinting towards my true identity.

Can I just not transition? Honestly, it kinda sucks being a dude, it sucks being in this limbo, and I have a feeling it would suck to transition too. I don't know how any of my family would react, including my wife. She seems supportive about me but not other members of LGBTQ+ (is that the current preferred term?), and that worries me.

I need advice lol