Hey guys,

I (33 m) have been seeing this girl (29 f) since may. She has been my first serious relationship since my 7 year marriage ended 2 years ago.

She is nice and has a good job. But recently she has been been unkind to a few of those around her. Additionally, I don’t feel like she really gets me or understands me. It’s difficult to open up to her. She isn’t really a good listener.

The sex life is problematic too. I have tried a lot of things like foreplay, going down on her, I once even lasted 45 minutes (timed) and still, she reaches nowhere in the end. She actually refuses to touch herself during sex, no response is given when prompted.

We have fun together going to different restaurants and I have introduced her to some of my hobbies which she now really likes. I also feel like our goals aren’t aligned. For example I want 3-4 kids and she wants 1-2 maximum..

In the next few months I will be moving for residency (U.S. based doctor) and I want to play the field a bit as a newly minted doctor. The past 10 years have been full of struggle, lots of opportunities for fun were missed as my head was buried in a book and finances were poor given how I was studying to get into med school and then medical school.

Am I the asshole for wanting to leave ?

30 ( M) here. Single. I am working in a job which I do not have a penchant for. Do not like it that much but it pays my bills and then some more. ( decent potential of making money ). I am at a juncture where I do not want to settle in a relationship anytime soon because of personal reasons and past experiences. I have an elder disabled sibling who needs to be taken care of. They stay with my parents and my parents also have a highly tumultuous and emotionally charged relationship. It has never been good. I have two other siblings who are loving and caring but are also going through their own significant challenges. I am at an age where I am pressured and expected to get married but I can’t right now. Coming from a middle class family, I think having and earning more money will keep me sane but I don’t have an end goal as of now. How do I proceed and what should be my priorities according to you?

Any and all advice is welcome and appreciated. Thanks.

I have lots of thoughts going through my mind about turning 35. I’m not at where some of my friends are in life, but I also know I’m doing better than others

I bartend at an off-the-strip casino in Las Vegas, and I drive for Uber occasionally. Between the 2, I make about $6k a month. I rent, but my car is paid off, no student loans or credit card debt, my fiance makes about $4k a month in her retail management job and is also debt free like me. So I guess we’re doing “well” relatively speaking.

I feel like this is a time to reflect on my past, take what I’ve learned from it and go from here. Bartending and driving Uber is fun and the money is good for what’s relatively easy work. But I find myself wanting to earn more, to really rise higher, the question is where do I go from here? Not just in my career but life in general

I’ve already made a lot of changes for the better so over the last 4 years. Quitting smoking (cigs) I now work out 5 days a week, I paid off all my debts, but somehow I’m still not satisfied with where I’m at, minus my relationship with my fiance which is awesome.

Did anyone else feel this way on the verge of their 35th birthday?

I've made a post about my gf before, long story short we ain't that steady. Alright back to the main concern.

My girlfriend and I used to have a thing where we will meet up on alternate days of the week for dinner dates, lately she has been canceling these dates, rather she has been setting alternate days to hang out with her "Gay" guy friend. I have never met this Gay guy friend of hers but she has been hanging out with him, reaching home 4am in the morning after going for drinks and getting drunk with him, for several weeks now.

Whenever I ask her about it she tells me I am overthinking and to trust her, she once made me feel bad that I had doubt her, to the point that I felt the need to apologise to her.

How do I approach this situation? What even is going on?

TLDR: Girlfriend prefers spending time with "gay" best friend, drinking etc, canceling on our weekly dinner plans coming home 4am in the morning, for several weeks, when asked she says I should trust her more.

I have 5 biological kids. 1.2k in child support and I cannot afford it making 27$ an hour. One child support is 15k behind the other 16k. I cannot afford it. If anything happens I'm dead in the water. Between child support and rent and just my car payment it's 3.2k alone. That's not water, electric, food, or anything else. I have my 1 kids 24/7 he lives with me. I don't pay child for. 3 of them pretty much 50/50 and my oldest who's 14 at least 2 days out of the month if she wants to come over. Shes always with friends or busy which is fine. But before that I had her every other weekend and as needed. I just can't afford this anymore. If I push back they push harder for me or I don't get to see my kids. I looked into a lawyer to try to get them 50/50 but because my back paid is so bad he said they can go from taking 40% to 69% child support so it's too risky. I live in Ohio. Idk what to do anymore. I don't have a college education and making more money then now feels impossible.

This might sound weird. But as a woman I am so consciously aware of the strength difference between men and women. I think about it constantly. I know other women are aware of it too constantly (on the subway, in an elevator, literally anywhere a man is present). My question is, do you guys also think about this?

Hello I’m 30 and just found out my girl has to been talking to dude who’s emotionally cheating on me. Apparently they’ve talked before we met only through gaming to my knowledge. I found out my looking at her iPad I just bought for her… the text are usually him saying hey gorgeous and some days she doesn’t even reply to him and he constantly spams her… there’s random moments she responds even sent a pic of bikini to him before. Other than that she stated she has no emotional ties with him and she’s feel like crap about it. This all happened today and I just packed some of stuff and went to my dad house for the week. We have a two cats her dog I’m so deep with her family and mines I just feel like my entire world is crashing. What I’m so conflicted about is she’s like my best friend we do everything together I’ve been approached and looked at by woman but I’m at a point of my life this is my person I don’t want to hurt her. She’s done this twice now….the old me would just end this but this my first adult relationship I just can’t think rationally about this. This really just sucks man. A part of me wants to be with her but would it ever be the same. I was going to buy a ring this Friday for Christ sake…. She met me 2 months after my mother died I was at my lowest. Talking to other women and I told her I wanted nothing serious and what I was going through. She wanted something serious and she accepted me at my lowest point. Idk maybe it’s a trauma bound or I just love hard. I use to be a player but I just want something real. This is just my rant never been on here but it seems resourceful. Bless

Howdy gentlemen! Looking to hear from your experiences when it comes to finding hobbies or outlets you enjoy during your free time. Recently I’ve come to terms with the fact I don’t have many of them and finding new ones can prove challenging when you don’t know where best to start. Would love to hear about what you’ve all enjoyed and found as “your thing”. Any input is always appreciated, thanks all!

I, 35 M, Father of 2, soon 3. Most of my friendships from past "lives" (jobs, university etc) feel estranged. With my wife, we don't feel we have friends anymore or people we can relate to. Or routine is basically work, groceries, kids activities, work... Kids parties Even our closest friends, we grew apart from the routine and politics issues that are sometimes incompatible..

I have strictly corporate relationships at work, my wife also. No friendships are being sealed there. It's very hard , it's like having no one around that understands you or feels like you. Everyone has its own daily life in a closed up bubble. It's actually weird, People love talking to us at gatherings, we know we are good company but no one does the steps to build or maintain a relationship. Me including. It's like we never can build a real relationship passed superficiality.

Men over 30, do you feel the same ? Men over 40, does it stay like that ?

For context: we are a family of four. Both kids (girls) are almost grown up - one in college, the other one is in high school .

We are solid middle class. Not extravagantly rich, but buying a big ticket item for Christmas isn't going to put a dent in the budget. Healthy family relationships - family dinners every night, talk to the kid in college on a regular basis, no lack of intimacy with my wife.

Yet... all my hobbies and interests are "crazy dad" interests. House repairs, wood working, yard work, playing guitar, riding bike - none of my girls are even remotely interested in what I do. Ask them, what is Dad doing in the shed yet again - and they would be hard pressed to give an answer.

I try to be attentive and anticipate their needs and interests. Like hey, an older one needs a new laptop, my wife really liked that Dior bag, the younger one could use some room upgrades, let me take care of that.

But when they ask (but mostly don't): "Dad, what do you want for Christmas/birthday", I struggle. I really don't want to go into the depths of why I could use a jointer or a nice Fender Strat. It's easier to say "hey, girls, I'm all set". I really could buy myself anything I need and it won't put a strain on the family at all.

Yet, I really wish they would check in on me and figure out "hey, let's make Dad a surprise and get him this cool guitar" or something. Instead I usually get a nice shirt or tie and cufflinks.

I think what made me write this is that today my wife asked me about Christmas gift, and I dropped that I was thinking about another guitar. And she just looked at me and said: "but why do you need it? Your hobbies are so expensive, your bikes, your guitar, and then you just abandon them".

I was very disappointed. A single bag from her collection is worth more than my guitar, amp and bikes together. Maybe she's just oblivious to the costs, maybe she didn't mean it this way.

I just felt very alone. Everyone cares in this family, but because they don't share the common interests, it's very superficial. Maybe if I had sons it would have been different?

Or maybe I'm just bitching too much. Thank you for reading this.

My husband prides himself on being a provider. He has kept us afloat, but has no degree and no transferrable skills. We have made it by on a shoe-string (generous) budget and he has held it over me for 5 years. We have one car I do not leave the house. I do not ask for extra things I try very hard to never ask him to watch the kids. I do not leave to visit family and friends All the housework and child rearing is my responsibility. He does not do laundry, dishes, meals, bathtime or bedtime, or any housework in general. We have three dogs, and three children, one with special needs.

All he does is work. At a job he hates and is underpaid for. Which I dont mean to belittle whatsoever, but he doesn't make enough. I usually do odd jobs such as babysitting and housework to make ends meet. He does not know this.

He is an impulsive spender and often asks where the money has gone. This has led to screaming fights where he insults my capabilities as a mother and my personal appearance.

In one month I am going to be working. Making 3x as much as he does. He wants to quit and stay home with the kids but I am scared. I am scared he can't handle this no matter how many times he tells me he'd love to "sit on his ass all day" and doesn't know what im complaining about.

The kids are hard. Our eldest son has autism and it takes a lot of patience. Our dogs are all rescues and also require a lot of patience. I feel so much resentment for the last five years of being told I'm a lazy mooch. I've raised three children, suffered a miscarriage, and still finished college to put us in a better place. All the while being told I'm a lazy, filthy, mooch.

I'll admit. Everything has slipped. I feel depressed, don't shower as much as I used to, and the house chores have fallen on the backburner to the kids needs. I feel like I'm blindly stumbling forward hoping once I can make more money he will see my worth again.

I guess my real question is, does making more money end this kind of resentment, or am I delusional? Are there women out there that can perservere through this and have the house spotless, dressed to impress, and maybe I'm just falling short of what is necessary?

I love my husband. I love our family. But I miss my friend. He used to see so much in me, and I'm trying so fucking hard that maybe I can't see where I failed.

No college degree, no apprenticeship, no money saved...

Not to get into my own experience any more than necessary, just wondering if there's people that have gone through something similar or would otherwise like to share their piece.

I've just woken up from a lifelong brainmist, my earliest memories of life are negative and of depression and anxiety. I haven't actually had the gumption or strength or whatever to do anything with my life. Now after starting a medication combo that actually works, I've realized how unbelievably comprehensive the feelings of worthlessness, depression and anxiety have been in my life. I'm finally awake, but now I'm faced with a reality where I have nothing going for me. It's been years since I last was able to do any work, I haven't finished any education and I've burned through all my interests and hobbies during my depression years and don't know if I can find myself back to them, at least not yet.

I guess my question is, how to start from nothing? I'm looking for ways to actually get to know myself, what I like, what I'm good at, what I'd like to do. While keeping a realistic view on things: I am already 34, have used up all the free educational opportunities given in my country and am financially in a massive hole. Even though I have a working medication now it seems almost impossible and too late to do anything.

Any thoughts?

Hi all. As I am in my early 30s I am noticing a weird change. In my 20s, I spent 7 years in a loving committed relationship to a woman. That ended when I was 27. Suffice to say I was pretty young and now I realise how I should have left ages ago. So I never did anything wild in my 20s because I was in love. Then from 27 onwards and after I was over the love of my life leaving, I was single so I partied a lot and hooked up a lot. Had some wild sexual experiences which were so fun! Eventually it got boring and tried to find someone serious. Unfortunately that has been unsuccessful. But recently I have been this weird feeling where I want to keep hooking up. But I don’t want to live that life. However I can’t stop thinking about travelling to other cities or going to Asia and just being wild again. I don’t understand. I know that’s not a good life and deep down I want to be a family man. I’m always thinking about being a father how I can be the best Dad to my kids one day. Then my idiotic penis just keeps thinking about going to a strip club and spending money on these women. Worst thing is, I’m actually cheap so I can easily convince myself not to go. I only went strip clubs for bachelor parties. Most men my age are settling down or want to but here I am thinking like an idiot in his 20s. I know porn is bad so I stopped watching it, for a while. Then I started making homemade porn videos with whoever I was banging if they were up for it. I don’t see my friends as much. I am working 12 hours a day now and I do a lot of overtime. I came home and ate a chicken wrap over the kitchen counter hunched over like an animal. Completely zoned out like this is all my life was. I actually one day came home and just looked at the floor for about 30secs before I snapped out of it. I’m Going to work, then gym, then eating. Then shower, sleep. Repeat. So yeah, I’m busting ass to pay my bills/debts so I spending on bars and women feels like a hit to the heart when I’m sacrificing a lot of time and sleep. I should be asleep right now! I just wondered why I’m going backwards, or perhaps anyone else feels like this is all life will be?? Or am I just being a twat? Sorry for weird post.

Retail-My male colleague said that he often has male customers getting violent & verbally/physically aggressive towards him. I notice this with other male colleagues where male customers tend to be hostile and generally more unpleasant towards them when they are just doing their jobs. I have never had that experience. People are generally kind to me even when I mess up and have never had anyone get that aggressive towards me. In fact when I see customers being rude with my coworkers and I try to help, they stop being rude. Is this a gendered thing? Not complaining but wondering what my colleagues are doing wrong! I am 19

My friend makes uncomfortable dirty jokes.

I have a friend. A good one in my first year of college. We drifted apart from second year onward, no bad blood. Talk a lot when we meet. Part of a close friendship is making sexual jokes and remarks about people as well. But there's a limit to it.

Just yesterday, I went to his room, talked a bit, enjoyed my time. After some time his current friend group came inside the room. My friend's personality changed entirely. The thing is I have some female friends, no one is close though. I have new male friends some of whom I am very close with.

As soon as his new friend circle came he started making the worst, degrading sexual jokes and remarks about my friends. Also about people that we both have talked very little to. Some women, they were making fun of, I hate them from the bottom of my heart, but the remarks were too disgusting. I laughed off at a few jokes. After a certain point it started getting very uncomfortable. I had to maintain a smile. He simply would not stop.

I came back to room. I am very disappointed in him. I am feeling today that he is not a good human being. I feel that he looks at every woman in a sexual way only. I feel guilty, not only about not standing up against him, but also laughing it off, and not showing my discomfort. I feel ashamed. How can people come up with sexual remarks so often and about every other women they meet?

I do not know how to act in future encounters.

Pretty much the title. For those of you who were struggling earlier in your life but ended up succeeding, whats your story? How did you do it?

I'm nearing 30, work a shitty retail job and make very little money. I'm fairly intelligent but I've dropped out of college a couple of times as I struggle with traditional academics. I was just hoping to hear from guys who have turned their life around after not doing much during most of their twenties.

I met a girl through online dating and we hit it off very well. However she then went overseas and I noticed that she didn’t message me as much as before.

She eventually ghosted me and a week later texted me saying that she is breaking up with me because her family doesn’t approve of me and because of religious reasons.

This took me by surprise because we had great physical chemistry together (we had a lot of sex like multiple times a night when we met 1-2 times week)

I met this girl in early September and she broke up with me in late November

Also in September I started a new job with a big pay increase and I was able to start saving money. Unfortunately I was terminated in late November as well . My now ex does not know that I lost my job btw. I was going to tell her but i didn’t see a point in telling her when she was ghosting me for over a week before subsequently breaking up with me.

I am really sad about losing my ex even though i knew her for a short period of time because i am worried I won’t find anyone else that would share the same level of intimacy with me. There were also a lot of little things that we were comparable with such as sharing stories with each other, our shared value for good hygiene and healthy eating and exercise habits.

I had a relationship for 3.5 years before and when she broke up with me I was able to move on quickly because the relationship was on the rocks for months. She broke up with me in June 2024. She did ask if I would take her back a few weeks later but I said no.

Sorry for the rant. What I would like advice on is:

1. How do I move on properly? I have been going to the gym almost daily and I did a DEXA scan showing I have 23% body fat. I am looking to get that down to around 15% by June 2025 ideally.

2. How do I go about finding someone else ? I have been using dating apps like Eharmoney and plenty of fish but no luck yet. I am worried I won’t find anyone else that is better. Also how much emphasis should I put on physical appearance? I ask because the previous people I have been with were all like 6-7 out of 10 but my most recent ex was a 10/10 regarding physical attractiveness and I really enjoyed that. I am also worried I won’t find anyone with a similar sex drive as me.

3. Has anyone had any experience in starting a business after being terminated from their previous job ? I am thinking of doing that if I don’t get a job in the next few weeks.

Thank you in advance for taking the time to respond to my post L

New date meaning this is a brand new relationship, didn't really know the person/know them well before dating.

Starting off by saying I know that ultimately it’s none of my business. I want him to be happy (but also protected and taken care of). My husband also has concerns and he’s someone who is usually very neutral about everyone.

Parents got divorced when I was 3 and for the 40 years in between my dad was single, with some girlfriends here or there. He’s an extremely private person with a good heart but (tbh) a difficult personality. He has a dark side due to his upbringing that he has to actively work to reign in. To his credit, he does have considerable self awareness but sometimes he succumbs to ingrained negativity, criticism and hubris that makes him say hurtful things.

Sometime during the pandemic we had a few arguments and I think he started to get really scared about his future as he gets older, who would take care of him, etc. This was never a question for me. I have some resentment about my upbringing, but bottom line is I would have taken care of him no matter what. Anyway, I think his pride started to take over and he decided to try to find a partner to grow old with, which he did find about 2 years ago.

I’m not sure of the exact nature of their relationship. I’ve heard them say I love you, but I’m not sure exactly how physical or romantic it is. Honestly, it seems like more of a companionship situation where now they can each present socially as having a partner and technically they live together, but I have reason to believe they sleep separately.

For the most part, I like her. One of my concerns was that he has a little money so he may be vulnerable, but she has money too so I don’t think that’s too much of a concern. Although she is extremely smart and I’m sure could figure something out if he reached a point of incapacity in any way. But no solid indication that’s what it’s about.

It’s more the way she talks in general and me wondering if she’s capable of truly loving someone like him (good heart, difficult personality). She’s EXTREMELY obsessed with status. To the point that she actively talks about people’s worth in terms of how much money they have, job title, etc. She pushed her daughter very hard and is just generally concerned with all things status. My husband and I are comfortable but live very humbly and I sometimes wonder what she must think of us. She has actually commented that our house is too “small”. Jokes on her bc we have the money, but truth is I hate big houses. No gifts or gestures I’ve made have ever been enough. She’s gone so far as to criticize gifts we’ve given. This would all still be manageable except that twice now she’s pulled me aside to tell me a “secret”, i.e. something critical of my dad, and then begged me not to repeat it and this had made me so uncomfortable. He’s someone I’ve told everything to. I wonder if she does the same thing to him about me. Deep in my bones, it feels like she’s running interference and I absolutely hate it.

They also both joke around about whether the other one is boring, and weird shit like whether one is poisoning the other which I actually asked them to stop doing because I didn’t think it was funny.

I know it’s not really my business. He’s an adult and has made his decision. I just can’t help but worry. It’s caused me to want to put some distance between us bc frankly our values are so different I don’t enjoy being around them anymore. I’m very sad about this as he and I were very close, but tbh he has changed. I’ve heard him start to talk like her and it’s like his values are shifting.

I was used to him as a single guy and now within 2 years he’s gone in a completely opposite direction and it just feels like I have to let him go and I worry because there’s just no way you can know someone well enough after only 2 years but they’ve gone full in zero to sixty.

I'm a teenager who wants to be successful in life, but doesn't want to start a business or take risks. I really want to be an accountant but I'm not sure if I should.

Im 20

In my opinion, having dated my way up to and past this age range, ages 35 to 39 are the ages where a man will have the highest quantity and quality of dating options. Basically it has to do with the behavior of women. At this age range you are in the sweet spot for women seeking second marriages. These are women with a relationship mindset, low body counts due to years of marriage, and who value financial stability above all else. Age 35 is about the time most men are hitting their career stride and pay and opportunities abound. You have been working out for 10 years or longer by then, you still have most of your hair, and you own a house and a car. You’re wiser, but not so wise that you want to be single, and your maturity level has finally matched or surpassed that of the typical woman in her 30s. In short you are at your peak overall attractiveness. If you want a partner, 35-39 is the time to become very serious about it. Most men will never have that many good quality options to choose from ever again.

What do you think? Is this bullshit?

I’m in a strange position where I feel both content and stuck in life, and I’d love to hear from anyone who has been through something similar.

I ended a toxic 3 year relationship last year, moved back to my home country (after 2 years), and essentially hit the reset button.

When I moved to the other end of the world in 2021 I left a nice career (in our family busines), close friends, a good life. I left because it became very dull / in my comfort zone and wanted to shake things up. I felt like time was just passing by, like I’m not fully living, not living up to my full potential. So just the usual millenial existential BS:)

After a while I realized though that the things I left behind are in fact important for me (family, friends, career, home, stability etc). So moved back beginning of 2023 and shortly after had the breakup. So I had a total reset last year. 

After a while I started dating a lot. I dated mostly through the apps and asked out a few girls irl but after a year I became burned out. Either not interested or when I felt the spark I got a rejection. Anyway I deleted the apps and man what a relief…Its just so good to not have any pressure. Conversing on the apps and going on dates started to feel like a second job/ a chore (even with some success). I felt the same patterns (with online dating) before I met my ex and knew it won’t take me anywhere.

So the problem: I feel content and discontent at the same time. 

I have a close group of friends, nice career, good family relations, do a lot of sports, meditation, go to great events etc. But its very much in my comfort zone…I’m afraid if things go this way I wake up at the age of 50 without a family, living alone, and doing the same routines…

I’m not in a bad place. Also I’m much more grateful for what I have then before I moved. 

I just feel a bit stuck. Like where to from here? What mindset should I have? How to move on? 

Has someone went through this phase (esp. in his/her 30s)? How did it all work out? Was there something clicked in you that moved the needle?

Hello fellas,

I'm a 28 years old guy here.

I'm quite lucky in the sense that I have a very good life now. I've never been more fit. I'm working in a good job where I'm appreciated. I have a lot of friends groups. I'm progressing in my hobbies.

Still, I feel that something is missing. That I don't really like/love myself. That all external validation, and it feels worthless.

I'm working through it through therapy. I think my family is a partial cause from this (very distant father) and being bullied during school didn't help. I want to work on it.

So, I would love to know how you did ended up liking/loving yourself more ?

Since your stature is so intimidating you need to start off nice with people you meet

Oddly specific question. But it’s one of those you won’t find on google. I’m gonna assume most people here have a professional job. If you’ve had to take a work picture. Or just a picture with some strangers and you’re next to a girl. Where is your hand placement? Waist? Shoulder? etc I’m simply curious because I don’t know the norm.

Since people are complaining about others not making content to counter the dating posts that have flooded this sub (https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMenOver30/s/38plaBak5A), I am asking about others’ experiences with bidets.

I am pretty sick of subs such as r/hygiene and social media in general shit on men (no pun intended) under the guise of “hygiene” and men not cleaning their assholes, when the reality is that most in the West do not use bidets and men have hairy butts.

Who here bought one and how did things change?

So, in broad female circles this is something that, to my experience, is considered a common known truth that men do.

That something the woman could have asked for years, the man fixes quite quick after the separation and divorce. Changing that job, taking that drivers license, visiting his brother, taking days off for a vacation, cleaning up his stuff in the garage, hitting the gym, fixing something in the house, you name it. Things that she rightfully asked for, often for a very long time, and that could have benefited both, or ease her workload, or his workload, etc. And after the divorce, he just does it.

Is this just a female perception of things? Or is this something men recognize to be common as well? If so, what do you think of it? And is there a female equivalent behavior that men think women do post divorce?

I have had this happened to me a few times, it hurts, but I am curious of the male perspective on this. Thank you for any reply!

Edit: thank you all for your input, I did not expect this many answers and are truly thankful for every one of them!

Some clarifications and context that I noticed could be of value. There might be a cultural parameter in my question vs the comments. Where I live the stay-at-home-spouse is more or less a non existent phenomenon. Both parties usually work full time even after kids and childcare is cheap and subsidized. When people comment about being the provider, or having someone home full time, I could not relate. I don’t know anyone who has, or ever had, that kind of setup.

The examples listed were a sum of what I have experienced, heard, read, and some were taken out of the air. The gym was not the best example, I was more thinking of one-off things rather than life improvement but I’m glad for all the answers! Many mentioned how they now have the time to do self care, which is great, and goes for both genders.

Some mentioned nagging, as in if you repeatedly ask me to do something I don’t feel like doing it. Some mentioned that women have to be less subtle and more clear in their communication. There is a paradox here. Perhaps these couples should have met each other and done a switcharoo!

Thank you all for your replies, it did ease my mind I can land in a conclusion that it’s individual, not gendered.

I’ve discovered I’m low on iron but in the green for just about everything else. I started supplementing iron and feel better but it got me thinking, what supplements other people taking and why?