I (46m, divorced 3 years) have gone out with someone (39F) 3 times now and there is basically no reason why I shouldn't like her. Very easy to get along with, enjoyable company, similar interests, pretty attractive, very natural to be with. Yet I haven't caught the feels. I don't feel sparks. Intellectually, I think she's an awesome fit but the feelings have not caught up. I want to give it time, but I am wondering how likely it is that something sparks later. I feel like it should already have sparked.

Three months in, wonderful guy. He’s 56, very attentive, consistently gets me off multiple times. He just doesn’t tend to stay hard during PIV stuff. I miss the feeling of closeness from it, and blow jobs can get a little boring. But I enjoy everything else, and I really don’t want to make him feel insecure. Do I just wait and see if he mentions anything and go from there?

I (43f) am about 3 years post divorce and about 2 years into dating again. I have been on tons of dates and dated a few guys for a handful of months (longest was 6 months) but feel everytime I go back to the world of dating in this era, it's still awful. I am completely solid on my own as a professional, a parent, etc. but am I the only one who feels like there are just no options because everyone decent is still married/taken and it feels soul-crushing?

Unprompted to a degree. I asked her if there was anything she would like to do differently in bed.

What I WASN'T asking was "what did you used to do with your exes?".!!!!

She said that sex with me was amazing but that she used to have more hardcore sex with exes and one night stands.

What am I supposed to do with that ... ?

I asked what that meant and she got awkward and said never mind, she shouldn't have said anything!

So now I'm stuck in sexual limbo.

We're (I thought) pretty adventurous in as much as we don't keep it all vanilla.

So what could she mean? What would that mean to you? Bigger, hardcore, fetish, BDSM...?

I'm lost and feeling pretty inadequate to be honest 😅

I've been dating this guy for around 2 months, we see each other multiple times a week, up to almost every day at times. The crush came big and fast and all in all we are having a great time.

After about a month I told him that I want more than casua, to which he replied that it was too soon for him to commit and he needs time - I get that and I can wait. In the same conversation he told me he isn't seeing anyone else and isn't interested in doing so, if that was what I was worried about.

Anyway, a couple of weeks ago I deleted my tinder profile (I think mainly because I kept checking his profile and seeing his updated location, I'm anxious, please don't judge).

Sadly, yesterday curiosity got the better of me and with a huge lapse of judgement I decided to make a fake tinder profile to see if I'd "find" him. (I know this is a bit on the crazy side, I low-key hate myself for doing that.)

Well, it took me about a minute of swiping to find his profile, with the green "active" tag. I was hurt. Does it mean he is dating someone else? I don't think so. He is a genuinely good person and I don't even know when he'd find the time to do that anyway, with us seeing each other so often. But still I wonder what he's looking for on there.

We had dinner that evening and I planned to talk to him about it, but I couldn't find the right approach.

Now, I don't want to remain in crazy town and play around and really think I need to bring it up. But of course I have navigated myself into a bad corner with the whole fake profile thing.

So I guess I have a couple options:

A) just ask him if he is still using online dating and take it from there (not a fan because this is a bit of a trap for him)

B) lie and say a friend showed me his active profile (I hate this option because it actually keeps me in crazy town and I don't want to lie)

C) come clean, admit the fake profile and ask him why he's still using the app (also not a great option, because while honest it reveals my crazy town residency)

You can see, I don't really know what to do. And I don't know what to feel (other than my pulse going through the roof all day.) Am I overreacting? I never asked him to delete his profile, I know there was no promise broken, I don't even know if he actually swipes or not.

So, daters: what to do?

So I've only been separated from my wife a few months, officially but we've not been good for a year minimum. I was very open about how alone I was, how distant she was, I'm not perfect but I tried and tried.... Anyway 12 year relationship with kids went to pot.

It is what it is. We tried.

I honestly have/had no intention of getting on the scene for a while, I have some alone time now, I can go cinema, gigs, eat out. I'm sad, I miss my kids but I'm doing my best and getting comfortable but since day one, one of my sons friends mother (who is single) has messaged me daily.

She's super sweet and really funny. We talk about everything and have tried to meet up but both having kids, stuff always gets in the way. This was fine, I'm not looking to date, I thought it was friendly... A few weeks ago she started getting flirty, really flirty and I pulled back a bit. She didn't. She'd send me selfies, of her on a night out, her getting ready for work, her in bed. I'd always be polite but I was very conscious about it all, on top of that she's ten years younger than me.

So yesterday I decided to be very upfront about it all, I said I really like her and I like chatting with her but right now I'm not looking to date, maybe in the future but for now I hope she's just happy getting to know each other, both our lives are too complicated right now.

She took a while to respond but got back to me to tell me she didn't see me like that AT ALL!!!! And that she's just friendly like that. I was so embarrassed. I said I just didn't want her thinking I was ignoring her advances or I didn't think she was attractive and she responded with "what advances?"

Well, we had a good long laugh at my expense and thankfully nothing has changed but Christ, I don't know how I'm gonna get back out there on the scene one day. I have zero idea what I'm doing!!!!

EDIT thank you all for the feedback, I guess I'm still trying to find my confidence and her saving face wasn't even something I had considered. I don't want to lose her friendship but I've set my boundaries so we'll just see what happens. This was my first post here and I gotta say, it seems like a lovely community

You just know

As they say when you come across your person, your love, you “just know”.

For those who have been lucky enough to experience love and being loved, would you say this is true?

What was the difference compared to other potential mates who you thought was love but turned out not to be?

I have an unbelievable calmness around this person I’ve met. It’s hard to describe. This was unexpected and welcoming but it feels somehow different.

I’m 48f, so I’ve been around the block a few times but this feels indescribably different. It’s also only been two weeks but what I am feeling is not lust or any other emotion that mimics love. I went to high school with this person and so I know him, but I don’t ‘know’ him, we are working on getting to know each other, lost touch over the years and reconnected recently. Something feels wonderful. No anxiety. I can’t say enough how different this feels, and it feels similar to the one time I was indeed, in love, and I knew then too but I was 17 so I’ve had 30 years of life experience in matters of the heart since then.

Thanks!

What are your experiences?

43F, met my 48M bf about 6 months ago. As we live in different cities, we have mostly commuted to see each other on weekends. Recently however as we both had time off, he asked me to stay over and we spent about three weeks 24/7 at his place as well as travelling a bit.

This time seemed much different from our earlier "dates". He was irritable, snapped at me randomly and did not seem as affectionate as usually. When I got home, he called me and then out of the blue told me that everything that I did while at his place had started to bother him. He added that he is wondering if he is just not meant to be with anyone. He was married twice before and ended both marriages himself as "fell out of love". I asked him if his feelings had changed and he said that no, he still cares about me the same and does not want to end things at all. Now I am confused how to interpret this.

Can a man still love a woman if he gets irritable and moody with her? I am not talking about one occasion, but things like criticizing shows I like to watch, food I order at restaurants or my driving skills.

How to interpret him saying that he might not be suitable to be with anyone at all? For context, he also has mild depression which makes him anxious and a bit OCD.

I just had a match in bumble tell me I gave you a liek because I thought you were pretty i don’t want to talk politics. Can we start over ? When I simply asked what side of the human rights spectrum they fell into

For me is extremely relevant. As a woman with ties to the lgbt community as a foreigner

This guy said I’m y my green card doesn’t require. Me to care.

To me my green card requires me to care even more

I can’t even.

I mean I you don’t understand women reproductive rights. My trans child’s or anybody’s else trans rights. My friend from Mexico right s what are we even doing here?

Is so sad babe to think that the shit that is going around doesn’t affect you but I guess as a white cys male it won’t

Please tell me I’m not crazy. Is id ok to pick matches based on social and political views ?

I have a slight travel addiction… I’m often finding ways to get myself to any warm beach I can get myself to… So it’s hard to find anyone that’s able to travel as much as I can … is it just unrealistic or am I just not meeting the right women ?

I should add that I’m just good at finding deals and making things work, I’m not some super rich guy with large amounts of disposable income..

Update: I have reported it to right authorities and I am waiting for their replies. One has come back and said it's not a scam. The conspiracy theories everyone is coming up with aren't productive.

I (40f) met a guy online (44m) whose given me his bank account to log in because he's on the ocean and his reception is bad. I checked out something regarding its processing on chatgpt and it said the bank was a scam and I was being scammed. I checked the website (https://www.centurioninational.com/) and it has lots of issues i.e. the annual reports don't download, the address is fake, it lists a branch finder for the banks and the link is dead, it calls itself centurioni bank and givens hall bank in some places.

I confronted him about scamming and he was crushed, and said he didn't ask me for any money so why was I attacking him? I am wondering if it's possible he's misspelt and its the wrong link, I can't really get that information right now cause he was in tears.

I don't think he's scamming me, but something is off about this website. He's absolutely crushed I thought he would do that. I have to know, so I've reported the website to the NCUA and I've done some checks.

His conflict style is withdraw and ignore and mine is to storm through. I NEED to know why this website is bogus, but he is broken up that I'm questioning him like this so I'm doing it behind his back. Please give me advice on how to resolve this upfront in the way I like but still accommodating his withdrawal and avoidance style of conflict. I met him for the first time tomorrow, but we've gotten close.

When you have decided to be exclusive with someone and have been exclusive for at least a year, do you still call it dating? That’s what I call it and wanted to see what other people say.

Also, we are exclusive and monogamous. Never have futuristic conversations beyond a couple months, have met each other’s family and kids once or twice, don’t see each other more than a few hours a week at most unless we take a vacation together (and we have done that a few times), usually seeing each other equates to rarely a movie, sometimes dinner, always drinks and sex, so am I off base considering that my dating partner and I are essentially exclusive fwb? Is that a demeaning or minimizing way to define what we have going on or given the info I shared about our set-up would you also define it the same as me? Orrrrr, would you call this dating? Orrrr would you call it a relationship?

These are all just curiosities of mine. I like my current set-up and we both seem content with it. I don’t “need” to define anything, just questions in my head today.

TIA!

Tried to wait awhile to have sex to focus on building an emotional connection. Made it 6 or 7 dates. Everything literally changed after we had sex. Now he says he actually isn’t ready for a relationship.

I’m 44 and trying to date intentionally now after a history of men who just wanted sex and not a committed relationship. I’ve been single 2.5 years and was excited about this one. Just feeling down.

Edits:

-some men

• we had sex 4 times over two different days
• the sex was good

Ok, preamble 1:

I turned 50 a few months ago.

I'm a pretty ordinary looking guy. 5'10", so a touch taller than average, but not remarkable. I've lost 6 stone over the last year. I go to the gym, mainly so I don't cannibalise all my muscle. I'm ok'ish, not a gym rat.

I was in a long-term relationship for nearly 20 years with a considerably older woman. I have no kids and this is a lot of why. That ended about ten years ago. I've had one other relationship that lasted a couple of years, that ended about four years ago.

I mostly threw myself into work otherwise.

I'm not exactly an extravert. I have a relatively small number of very close friends, none of whom are particularly close to my age, or live all that nearby. This is pertinent in that recommendations from friends isn't much of an option.

By way of short-hand -- and we don't need to get into whether I am -- I have a kind of ADD'ish personality. Not great with Crowds and noise. Introverted. A bit socially awkward. Periods of extreme hyper-focus.

Preamble 2:

I don't attract much attention on dating sites.

I wouldn't really expect to. I'm decent enough, but it's not like many people are going to see me and go, "I want THAT!" I've had a few matches with people that just petered out. Entirely fair. They didn't seem super interested, or interesting and, honestly, I felt pretty boring talking to them.

I was talking to someone for the last week and a bit where everything seemed to be going GREAT. We had arranged to meet on Saturday and then moved it at Sunday at her request. Our last exchange was:

just taking the dog out for her last walk if there's a delay I've not nodded off lol xxx
Oki doki. Be safe. :)
Let me know when you're free to be bothered some more. 😘
Your on 😊 xxx

Yeah, I know it's not scintillating conversation, but there's nothing here that says there's a problem.

And I'm pretty sure she's blocked me.

Yeah, I get that we haven't met yet -- though I have booked a couple of things -- and I get that she's entitled to change her mind at any point and I have no right to any justification, or warning. I'll be honest, I am a little saddened by it, even though we haven't met. I mean, how many people am I going to meet where the conversation feels really comfortable and who says they'd like to snuggle and build Lego together???

I don't think there's anything particularly I've done to provoke this, so I'm not asking, "OMG! What heinous thing could I have done to cause this ick?" It could be anything.

But this is the background to my current pondering.

Ok, we're done with the preambles...

Ok, one thing that's probably relevant. The match described above was on Woo Plus, which is a site for plus size people. This is mainly because I used it before when I was much heavier and it seemed like people might be a bit more accepting that I'm kind of squishy after losing a lot of weight. But this does mean there's a small number of people there.

That said, I have tried Bumble also and it was exactly as terrible. Actually maybe worse, since one of the four people who matched with me -- and none of whom were within a practical distance -- literally had, "I'm an ethnonationalist, jus sanguinis!" in her profile. :(

So, first based on my limited experience with online dating the vast majority of profiles just seem to be dead, given that messages sent to them don't get read. The majority of people who do read the message aren't interested. (Entirely fair.) Of the now rather few who reply the conversation peters out pretty quickly mostly. The only other match I've had that seemed promising -- though not as good as the above seemed to be -- also flaked out the day before we agreed to meet.

I've seen plenty of complaints from women that men just shotgun likes at everyone and their dog, but every part of my experience so far says that's probably the only way to go.

Even if I were attracting a heap of matches, I don't really want to try juggling a bunch of different women at once to see if I can get one of the actual date stage. That seems ugly and disingenuous, but again, trying to be half decent about it seems to be profoundly counter-productive.

Anyhow. It essentially seems like my only opinion is to pay for one of the big sites and spam the bejeesus at everyone who looks like even the vaguest fit. And that's just really depressing.

Sorry this is long and rambling and dumb. Thanks for your time.

Edit: What do I do to make this work better?

Help me make my profile better?

https://imgur.com/a/deiAxxc

The last two pictures aren't part of my profile. They were taken this week.

I had shared them with the person I was speaking to, so she had an idea what I currently look like, since I'm a fair bit heavier in some of them. I don't exactly have a lot of pictures of myself, so I guess that's something I'll have to organise.

I (40F) have been dating a wonderful guy (47M) for about 4 months. He has so many great qualities: kind, intelligent, funny, thoughtful, honest, forgiving, fair, loyal, hard working, responsible, communicative, we have similar goals and values. Oh, and he’s crazy about me and puts in most of the effort to see me. When we’re together, I feel safe, at home, comfortable. Our conversations are easy and we can talk for hours.

The problem is that we live almost 2 hours apart. That might not be as big of a problem if we were younger and kid-free, but we both have shared custody of our respective kids (him 50-50, me 85-15). My kids are elementary age and between their young age, my having them more often, and our distance, we only see each other every other week, or sometimes once a week. We’ve gone away for a 3-day weekend together once, and it was lovely. We both talked about how easy and fun it was being with each other then, as well as a couple of other times we’ve managed to spend more than a day together at a time.

As much as I absolutely feel I would love to be with this man longterm, I’m not handling the long distance well. We talk fairly frequently (on the phone a couple times a week, and text throughout most days). But I find myself disappointed/missing out when I don’t know about happenings in his day-to-day life. And we’ve both had times when we had a really rough day and it would have been so much better if we could have given each other a hug, rather than having to wait several days to see each other. Physicality (sex, intimacy, cuddling, etc) are important to me, and I think that’s part of the reason I’m struggling with this. We get these wonderful times when we can spend time together, interspersed with these lulls where we feel (he’s mentioned this also) disconnected. It’s hard to envision how the relationship could truly progress this way.

Also there’s the reality of a potential “end date” to the long distance. Unless I were to move to him (and I really love the area I live in and would not want to be away from my limited “village” as a single mom), it would be more than 3 years before his youngest would be done with school and he could even think to move. Not to mention the fact that I’ve gotten to know (and it’s one of the things I appreciate about him) how many people he is close to where he lives, and he’s much more social than I am.

So on the one hand-he’s practically my “dream guy,” but on the other hand, I’m starting to have serious doubts about how this can last long enough for us to eventually truly be together. We have talked about this before, as we both have similar concerns, and so far neither of us has been willing/wanting to end things because we both value each other so highly.

TLDR: if you’ve had a long-distance relationship, especially post-youth with all the messy complications of adulthood, I’d love to hear your experience in how you navigated it!

She broke up with me because I wouldn’t pay her bills. Reposting this because I didn’t have a question in my post.

I am dating a mid forties woman in the Bay Area for a month or so, this weekend she asked me to give her money to pay her rent, etc. She finally confessed that she is broke, unemployed and is having difficulty finding work, paying bills and provided for her teenage son. When I told her that I cannot afford to maintain two households she told me she loved me and wanted to spend her life with me. I said “that’s great, but I still can’t pay your bills when I can barely pay my own.” She immediately broke the relationship off with me and mentioned later that she is messaging and pursuing other men. Wow! My narcissist radar was going off. She really was love bombing me in the beginning, then the devaluation and discard because couldn’t pay her bills. Ugh! What would you do?

Hello everyone. I’ve been dating my gf 47F for a couple of months and she’s been pressuring me about marriage since we began dating. I’m 45M and have never married. She’s married once before and is Christian. She had previous relationships with no marriage after she was divorced about 20 yrs ago. We have had some disagreements but she gets over them very quickly while I still stay trying to analyze them. She then tells me that I am being too negative. I think that she is trying to get married too quickly. What do you guys recommend? I do not make enough money to support her and her kid, but she doesn’t seem to worry about that. Please help.

Title says it all 45 year old guy , on and off for 5 years . Always said his head was never there for a relationship . So we would see each other from time to time . In the last few years he would always make everything about himself , never asking about me . His messages to me were often , ‘ i a need a drink ‘ . which meant I want sex.

I don’t drink so I’d go along for the company and admittedly I needed the affection from time to time . Although I rarely got it from him . He was always negative , frustrated with his work partners that were also his aunt and uncle . He would tell me how terrible they were to him , screwing him over, taking advantage of him .

I listened all the time .

Then I noticed that he would start to lash out at me over text.

Back handed compliments , I got promotions I was proud of and never once congratulated me . I bought a new car after I was in an accident . First oil change I send him a photo of a classic car at the dealership .

He replies , what’s wrong with your piece of shit ? Because I was at the dealership

I was renovating my kitchen and doing the demo myself with a friend and when I sent him a photo of the progress, he replied , you think you know more about kitchen Reno’s that I do now right ?

He was angry because I didn’t ask him for advice or help

After a few months of not seeing each other , we went out to dinner where he emptied half a bottle of rum .

He asked me if I wanted to go back to his place . The whole evening was all about him . Never once did he ask anything about me .

The fool that I am , I went to his place . He drank a few more rums. He was complaining that his back was hurting .

Of course I got the message and we went into the bedroom , I gave him a massage .

We had sex and by sex I mean he lay there on his back , didn’t even kiss me, barely touched me. He fell asleep , I left .

The sex often played out like this . Yet for whatever reason I would go back and say wow wtf I am doing !?

We texted after , may have spoken on the phone , not sure

Fast forward to Jan 13 , I’m on a work trip to Vegas . I took one day to go on a guided hike .

I thought we’d be a group of people but when the guide texted me and said I’m picking you up in a convertible mustang, I texted him and said i was going on a hike and in case anything happens this is the guys name phone number etc .

His response to me : Happy Endings?

I replied thanks , Now I really know what you think of me .

He replied that it was a joke and that I should grow up .

I didn’t respond. 5 days later , on Jan 18 he messages me . How are you ?

Sadly , I decided to reply on Jan 23 that I was good

He replied that he was stressed and needed a drink .

I said have one. He replied ok

A few more messages about nothing .

6 days later , he updates his status on FB to In a Relationship

Obviously I am at fault for staying in touch . No one put a gun to my head . He was mean spirited , condescending etc

so why am I bothered by his announcing a new relationship ?

He always told me that he keeps his private life private , but here he is announcing a new relationship and it’s bothering me .

What does GPO USA mean when describing where you are from on a dating app?

For those dating with no kids. Have you ever regretted it? And would you consider being a first time parent deep into your 40s?

For those with kids, what do think kid-less people would regrett the most when they become older later in life?

Does that mean I need to converse with more people? With more women?

The post where OP wanted to find out if a guy at the Chiropractor office was single got me thinking.

Nobody usually asks me if I'm single or dating anyone.

An older coworker did once recently because it was happy hour and the conversation was about people's kids and spouses, etc. Coworker was just curious because I have been there 4+ years and never mentioned dating anyone or kids.

All my guy friends know I'm single. Their wives or girlfriends know I'm single. Nobody asks me if I'm dating anyone new or that they want me to meet someone they know.

I feel maybe the conclusion is I just need to talk to more people. Not even just people I would like to date but anyone.

I know I don't have to appeal to everyone. And I probably will have most success on apps. But it sometimes bothers me that people assume I'm alone all the time (which is true).

I’m 41 and I don’t know what to do 🤷🏾‍♀️ I want to meet someone and I go out and chat to people, I have guys who are interested but don’t want to date. I know I’m good looking ( not in an egotistical way) but because I am. Ihad like 300 DM’s from one post in another group last week telling me so… anyway the issue is no one seems to want to go deeper than that. I don’t know why like get to know someone and build a connection. I’m based in London UK so not sure if it’s a London thing but it’s very frustrating. What can I do? I’ve done online dating but it’s not really my thing.

Hello, can someone please give and example of what this is and why it is bad? 41 single female here.

I've (42F) hooked up with this guy (39M) a couple times, and we've both expressed wanting to again. He lives an hour away, so I can't just be like "come over." I'd like to send kind of a spicy text to him about hopefully seeing each other this weekend... ideas please? Anything I can think of either is too subtle or completely vulgar. What would really turn you on as a man to get as a text? He does seem to be the type that is very openly sexual in conversation.

Hi there,

There is a guy that I see at my chiropractor's office almost every time I go. I find him very attractive and seems like a nice guy based on how he interacts with the staff there.

We awkwardly sit and wait for our appt. How would I drum up a conversation since it has been months of awkwardly sitting and saying nothing? I am 43/F who has not initiated anything before since I was married for my whole adult life.

I also am not sure how to gracefully ask if he is single. Please help! Lol

So I don’t know why I’m not as excited as I should be, but a girl that I’ve wanted for a while now wants to have a date. So since about 2020, I saw this girl online through one of my friends pages and thought she was hot. We’ve talked and flirted online and a few months after I wanted to meet and bring her a Christmas gift just as a gesture. She kept saying she wasn’t able to meet, but I can leave the gift for her in the lobby of her building with the guard. I left the gift and we kept flirting online and talking, but it started to fizzle out to the point where we stopped texting. Well, she reached out to me when she recently had some loss and wanted to express her sadness. This also sparked up new conversations, and we considered speaking and meeting again. for the last year and a half I’ve been trying to connect and make a date with her for us to hang out and spend quality time. She has a daughter who is about six and I have a child as well. Well, all this time pass and finally this week since it was her birthday she wants to meet up and is very adamant about making it happen with more energy than I’ve ever seen before. The problem is I have the least amount of energy for this, and I’m actually not that excited to meet up in person and put my energy towards this, which confuses me because I was very much into her and thought she was very, very hot and my type. What’s wrong with me now?

I find it a huge red flag when I date someone and they compliment me by putting down someone else.

Like ‘you look like her but better body’

Or ‘you’re gorgeous and natural not like all those women with tattoos/piercings/short hair/whatever’

I find it really off-putting. Can someone tell me why people do this? Do they think they’re flattering us? Do some people actually like this?

I find it gross if a man puts down other women to compliment me. When I give a compliment it’s genuine and I’m not comparing them to someone else. I’ll say ‘you’re so attractive’, not ‘you’re so attractive not like him’.

What do other people think?

I met him dancing and didn’t realize how poor his English was until we tried to plan a date through text. I started feeling frustrated so I told him I enjoyed dancing but the language and cultural barriers felt too challenging. He received my message kindly and respectfully. I thought that was it for us but I ended up seeing him around dancing a few more times. The first time I kept my distance and just danced once (salsa dancing). The second time I saw him it was new years and I ended up dancing with him into the new year and we had a new years kiss. It was sweet and kind of magical since we both don’t drink and so a spontaneous new years kiss is unlikely for me. I thought that was it, he texted the next day but it didn’t proceed and I was happy to let it fizzle because I was thinking we were not compatible . Then I ran into him again that weekend dancing at Afro beats night and we danced all night. Since then we’ve been seeing each other more regularly and have shared some intimacy.

The language barrier is challenging for sure but there’s also an organic connection and flow even without speaking.

So here’s my question, have any of you ever dated someone who doesn’t speak the same language? If so, how did it go? Any suggestions or tips?

I’m still very much on the fence about dating him more seriously. I’ve been seeing it as a casual Fwb situation but it’s obviously we both are growing feelings for each other. Today was the first time he did something triggering and it was hard because I couldn’t talk about it. I google translated a very basic text with my feelings and a request which seemed to work better than i expected. Tbh, I am m not nearly as in my head as i normally am in the beginning phases of getting to know someone but I did want to hear from others who have experienced this and hear how they navigated.

Back in the dating game for the first time in what seems like an eternity. Basically. I’m a simple guy. I don’t have a fancy job, fancy car or a fancy house. But I don’t really want those things. I am happy with what I have and who I am. I genuinely appreciate other things, like thoughtfulness over materialistic things. Should I say this on a dating app profile of does that come off as I am “settling” for what I have?

If a woman says she's flattered after you ask her out that means you're ugly right?

The night before we sat close and she broke the touch barrier more than a few times.

She followed up with she's not in a place to date but still asked if I was joining her and her friends for our usual event.

I'm being dramatic but still.

Edit: whoa! Lots of responses. The first line was a joke I said to my friend group and got a laugh. My self esteem is fine. My dating life is fine. It's a world of plenty. The apps work for me. A real life meet would have been a better story but here we are. I have no problem with being friends with women. I didn't use friend zone in the pejorative. I met a lovely lady and I asked her out. She declined a date but we've continued to hang out. No regrets. I'll always shoot my shot. My fifteen year marriage was also a slow burn in the beginning. Things are all good here.

Thanks for all the replies!