If Facebook, then what is your favorite Facebook group? If YouTube, then what type of content do you prefer?

And how much time do you spend in a day?

Like everyone else, I went for the hottie to date. Then I learned she could be the loser in the group. (Very high chance she was the laziest one.)
I have notice my taste in the woman I date has been changing over the years. I went from hottie to highly educated. From educated to practical/common sense. Now, in my later years, I look at your finances and how stable you are. (because I''m not going to finance somebody for the rest of their life.) And lastly, I look at your health. How close do you seem to be dropping dead?

So in your later years, how have you changed?

Hi,

I am from a poor background and have recently started earning well. All my collegue's and friends have gotten to a stage where they are fulfilling their dreams and checking off bucket list.

On the other hand, I have got significant responsibilities on my shoulder (elder sibling's marriage, uplifting family's living standard, emergency fund etc.). I've recently spent ~70% of my net worth on a wedding and soon be spending on one more marriage. The amount that I've spent is bare minimum according to culture and practices.

I feel like I am putting away my happiness, goals, and dreams as I save all the money I can to fulfill my responsibilities. Is there a better way? I don't see what else can I do in this case.

I cannot find a single one in my brown hair, but I have been growing a few whites in my eyebrows here and there for a few years now. Is this unusual?

Just curious. When I got my car in 2015, there was 3 trim levels with minor differences and an manual or cvt trans. It was available in like 5 colors.

From learning about cars in the 50s to maybe early 80s cars seemed to have so many more options. Things like having a column or floor shift manual, a radio, different gears in the diff, and many more options that are included today. I know things like disc brakes and ABS used to be expensive options.

If you bought a car by picking from options what was it like? I feel it would be such a hard decision to decide what to spend on. Was it as good as you hoped?

I have fast metabolism and can eat literally anything and everything. It’s sort of hard for me to get full. I’m 6’1 165, athletic build( I stay in shape by playing basketball and running , cardio is good )

Do you guys try not to over do it even tho we can with our issue? I can eat two large pizzas and not be full . It’s like a gift and a curse lol

I'm 36 and even though I'm active everyday I notice my stomach seems a little bigger than it used to be 5 years ago. Not out of shape but a little bigger than I remember. I've probably put on 10lbs. I haven't really changed my routine. I don't eat more, drink , or do anything that would gain weight. Maybe my metabolism is simply slowing down but I'm not sure. Just wondering if anyone can relate or know if that's what it is.

Just curious what it's like for retirees. I dunno if I should look into market place health insurance for them or not.

I've always been curious about this. I've had numerous "cousins" (family friends we call family) and my actual cousins were born by parents who were a few years off from approaching 50. But I'm super curious about the ones who had kids in their 50's or even 60's.

There is a family in my neighborhood who the parents look 68-75 years old, and yet they have 2 teen daughters no older than 16, and they even have a 3 year old toddler. The kids are extremely rowdy and the parents "chase" (walking around slowly yelling at them) the kids (and the dog) around and it's funny how rowdy and disobedient (in a playful way) the kids are. They seem like a happy and healthy family.

But I'm so curious about this:

-The parents are most definitely retired and pretty comfortable financially. Them not having to work and both being full time parents definitely has some merits.

-But they are no longer youthful. I'm sure the kids are as rowdy and misbehaved as they are because they view their parents as weak and can get away with it. But do the kids and their youth keep the parents younger by chasing them around and engaging with their youthful energy? Do the kids sometimes wish they had younger parents? Someone to play basketball against and feel like "man I gotta get so much better so I can beat Dad!"

-Is there any embarrassment for the kids for having that "old" parent that the other kids might ask at a school event "oh is that your grandpa"?

-The kids more likely than not are going to grow up without grandparents. And the parents without grandkids. To experience a grandparent's love is a blessing. And I'm sure for a grandparent, to experience a grandkid's love is a blessing. This is forsure one of the tradeoffs of having a kid so late in life.

-How is this even possible? We are told that by 40 a woman is really pushing it if she can have kids or not. Yet this woman in her 60's has a toddler. And I have read (few) reports on reddit of people having a 80+ year old parent when they are barely in their 20's.

-What happens if they die in their 70's? It's possible they never make it to their 80's. So for kids born to 60 year old parents, the oldest kids are still teenagers. No grandparents. Who takes care of them then?

Anyway, hoping someone here who lived it can shed some insight. Thank you.

I left 2 years ago for college. I used to live in a small-ish town (well, more like a small city but life was much more slower there) and it was pretty okay overall. I had friends, spent most of my childhood there, and I didn’t really had any issues with it growing up apart from the immense boredom I felt.

I felt stuck there and all I wanted to do was get out. I finally did after I graduated highschool where I decided to go to college in a much bigger city.

Now life here was fast. Like really fast. Hella fun too, and I can finally do the things I wanted to do that I couldn’t back home.

But I never felt home here. Why should I? It’s not the place I grew up in.

But recently I’ve come to realize I don’t feel at home ANYWHERE.

I’ve spent way too much time away from my hometown that everytime I come back I feel… slightly out of place. There’s nothing for me there and all my friends have moved on or we grew apart. Some people I still talk to there don’t really feel like friends anymore. They only know me as that weird guy from highschool when I’m not that person anymore.

I’ve grown so much and everyone back home still has the same idea of me back when we were 16. I guess that’s why I started to distance myself from that.

But I miss it, ya know? Being a stranger in a new city is one thing, but feeling the same thing back the same hometown you grew up in? That’s something else.

Please help me understand. I’m so lost and confused.

For some reason, I can fall asleep easily when I go to the bed at night but I wake up everyday exactly after 3hrs of sleep no matter at what time I go to the bed and then I can't fall back asleep and I'm wide awake. I know there's a fancy term for that 'Sleep Maintenance Insomnia' This has been going for the last 6months and even before that I can't remember of a time when I had been asleep continuously in a single stretch. Though I tend to function fine on 3hrs of sleep, I am scared of it continuing in the long run and health complications that could arise as a result of these.

Now I'm confused about getting a sleeping pill prescription for my problem as I am afraid I'll develop tolerance to the medication and soon enough even with drugs I'd be getting just 3hrs of sleep like a lot of people have said that even after taking sleeping pills they can only sleep for 3hrs.

EDIT: I've had all my health markers checked including a sleep study but none of that could come to any conclusive evidence about the underlying issue causing Insomnia and after all my health reports were fine, doctors concluded that There's no reason for my Insomnia and it's most likely Idiopathic.

There are things money cannot buy. It happens at all ages and it's important to take a moment and recognize, these are the good times.

I know there are other communities to post this but want to ask here as everyone will likely be closer to my age and I feel that would make the answers more relatable.

I’ve struggled with this most of my life now and it’s severely impacted every conceivable aspect of it. When not medicated, it is so bad that I have actual physical tremors and body temperature rises sometimes when close to others or especially when speaking in a group setting.

I took stronger medication than I am currently taking and I saw a glimpse of who I could have been without the senseless fear and anxiety plaguing my mind on the constant. Unfortunately that took a pretty big physical toll on my body and I have had to quit, then move back onto much weaker medication that helps far less.

This has also led me to abuse alcohol and other calming drugs as a bandaid solution to get through the day sometimes.

As a grown man, I feel ashamed that I am having these problems although after therapy I now know it is from childhood trauma and PTSD, etc. Even so I judge myself for it harshly and rightly so because it has really hindered my career progress among so many other things.

I mean, I have a job and a wife live on my own and am responsible enough but still it’s kept me from doing so much more. I also feel a lot of guilt that I haven’t been able to do better to provide a more lucrative life for her as well because of this.

Just wondering how many other grown dudes here still have this issue. If so, how do you deal with it or mask it? Has it hindered your life and growth as well?

In your 30’s, unless you have chosen the path of a confirmed bachelor, you are typically on the brink of irreversible life decisions and are settled in a career path. The wide open possibilities of your 20’s seem to narrow each passing year. Yeah you can still make some radical changes but it gets much more difficult. How do you avoid feeling trapped with all your grown responsibilities? (Mortgage, marriage, kids, pets, etc)

I have been a bit of a failure to be honest. I suffered through school with learning difficulties. I wasted money in my 20s through partying, drugs, women etc. I'm now sat here as a man in my mid 30s without a career, unemployed and in a situation where I'm needing to start all over again. I have no options but to apply for low paid jobs because that's all I'm good for at the moment. I have never been qualified in anything. I have been caring for my father who has had health issues for 4 years. I am not depressed, but I am feeling low in motivation with no idea where I go from here. The only other friend I have is in a similar situation. He is mentally ill and cannot work. I need to surround myself with a more motivating environment. I currently do not have this. I actually have no idea what to do. I had dreams of doing much better for myself in life than I currently do. I need to make some moves before things are really too late. I'm not young anymore and I can't go much longer in this predicament. I was considering starting my own business, but capital is an issue at the moment. Do you have any advice on how I can change my situation?

My father is a great man. And a great dad too. But it's also very tough being his son. And he had the same issues with his own mom, who had issues with her dad. So it seems generational. Where we love this parent but also resent them for how judgmental they are. Where sometimes they don't view us as who we really are but this image they have of us in their head. And that they want us to kiss their ass and get upset when we push back on their ignorance, hate, and stupidity. We never measure up to who they want us to be. And we could be successful in all areas of life and they will still find something to nitpick us on and make us feel bad about ourselves.

Every man has dreams, and much of my worldly dreams I always envisioned my father being proud of them. That part of the success of those dreams were my father being proud of that success:

I have a passing dream of becoming an esteemed author and my father finally realizing my genius.

I always had dreams in my adolescent of dating hot girls and my father recognizing I was a stud.

I had dreams of being a great athlete and my father witnessing my perseverance.

It's like every facet of my life this man has control over me. It's absurd when I think about how much I think about this man and what he thinks about me. Even women who I've been crazy over didn't take precedence over him in my thoughts. Hell, sometimes I would express myself to these women about feelings I have about my father.

Will I ever grow out of this? I refuse to let this haunt me for the rest of my life. How do I break out of this? Anyone else ever gone through this?

I’ve never really had the luxury to afford big things for my parents up until last year. I’m not rich by any means, but I’m super thankful for my dad and what he’s done in life to support us and i want to make sure he knows i am.

Budget : $0-1000. I know it may not seem like a lot but could anyone offer any tips/advice?

He did express how much he loved the Don Julio 1942 i bought him but never drank it because it was “too expensive”

Same thing with the bottle of class azul i bought him. They’re both on display in the house which i find amazing how he never wanted to drink it lmao.

I’m his only son out of 4 daughters and we only recently started doing dad-son stuff about three-ish years ago. (24M)

Most of our bonding was through landscaping, sports and car stuff like changing brakes, an alternator and the usual basic maintenance.

For some background info that can hopefully help in choosing a gift or gifts:

He’s not super super into cars but after i got my Mustang in 2022 he always told stories of the old Camaro he used to have in college. Though he was a big Camaro guy the fam is mostly a Ford family.

Loves Futbol, he has a big heart for the Mexican national team though we need massive improvements, hell even new players. Also roots for USMNT.

He is fairly handsy and most of the basic maintenance like brake changes, oil changes he does in the garage. I’ve helped him with TWO alternators on cars in the family and enjoyed every second of it lmao.

We replaced all four rotors on my Mustang as well, so he has plenty of tools, maybe new tools?

He has a grille that is taken out for the summer.

Big on planting and growing his own veggies and fruits.

He has a bike already, not too big on coffee.

Any help, tips or advice would really be appreciated. I still have two months!

Hi !
a little context; yesterday i had a talk about my opinions of myself with a friend, it went fine. the thing is, at many point in the conversation, he was looking at me with care in his eyes (and a bit of sadness cause i was not saying nice thing about myself lmao)
i did not say anything at the time, but i hated it. not because he is a man and i'm a woman or anything. i hate it when women look at me like that too. i just got reminded of that hate it yesterday.
it's visceral, like i can't control it. I hate being looked at like that and i feel like i don't deserve it. like i don't deserve care. like the idea that people care about me is weird and unnatural in a way ? i dunno
sorry it's a bit rambly but i would like to know if anyone else is like that ? and what you did about it haha

I earned my degree in video production in 2018. I am in the USA which means my major was video editing and my minor was business. Since then my employment prospects have been a nightmare. I have only been offered 1 full time job out of 5,000 applications throughout my 20s. And that paid 19.23 a hour and I was laid off from it in February after 2.5 years. This job had 1 major problem though and it was a training reimbursement requirement of 15k. Basically in short the contract stated for any training you received (even if its showing you the door code to open the front door) you would have to reimburse the company for training you for 15k if you leave before 3 years is up. This contract was shoved in front of me right offered I signed my offer letter and out of desperation I signed it. This was a mistake and I am not following for it again. This was most likely illegal do to my research but the company could try to sue me and it made the job very stressful. Sometimes I was screaming on the way to work so it's somewhat mutual to part ways.

I will be 30 in October and I don't know what to do with the job situation. It's been very upsetting. I have come to the belief that pursuing a video career is stupid. I have been trying to move into IT and got my Comptia A+, Network +, and Security +, currently studying for CCNA and after that I don't know what to do. But IT seems like a real tough industry to get into in 2024 especially without a stem degree or military experience. But I somewhat like doing the certifications a lot more than doing college. I am living with my parents who don't understand how my college degree has not benefited me and that's really upsetting.

​

Anyways for men over 30 what happened with you if you got a video production degree? Are you rich or poor or somewhere in between?

I feel so much of my anxiety and depression is centered around social outings and spending time with other people. I know it's important to push yourself into social situations, but I feel like every time I do, I end up feeling so miserable about myself afterwards.

Admittedly, I'm quite far behind in my life compared to my peers and family so I guess that comparison is kicking in. But it's just such a shitty feeling to deal with afterwards so I'm wondering, why should I even bother?

If being on my own makes me feel better about myself, what's the point of putting myself into situations where I leave feeling miserable?

Hey all. So I'm having pains and sores that I should have taken care of. The reason I don't go is I have zero idea how much anything is going to cost! Will seeing a doctor cost me $100 or $800. How do I properly find out before hand?

For reference I went to an urgent care about a year ago and they had costs for each procedure printed out. After insurance ended up being more than what was printed!

I don't mind the costs, I just need to find a way to properly budget for these things instead of rolling the dice anytime something feels wrong.

I'm located in Florida if it helps at all.

As someone who's recently turned 30, I've been thinking a lot about how to maintain a healthy lifestyle while indulging my tech hobbies. I'm a bit of a tech geek—big into gadgets and gaming—but I've also realized the importance of staying fit and healthy, especially now that I’m in my thirties.

Recently, I’ve been using virtual reality to help meet my fitness goals. It's a fun way to blend my interest in technology with my need for physical activity. Plus, I’m trying to kick a smoking habit that’s been with me since my twenties.

I’m curious to hear from others here. How do you balance your tech hobbies or other interests with health and fitness goals?

A lot of times we make short term decisions that don't serve us. What are some long term decisions that you have made that have changed your life for the better, OR for the worse.

Please provide some context and your thought process when you made it and how you feel about it now.

I’m already noticing that I begin to forget more and more of my early childhood, and I wish I’d been keeping a better history of my life.

Have any of you kept journals from your youth, or picked up journaling later in life? Would it be something you’d recommend starting sooner rather than later?

As the title says.

An example would be time freedom. Freedom to do what you want , when you want to me is priceless.

Wondering if any guys here have noticed a change when they wear their wedding ring. Do people treat you differently? How? Or is it just all the same?

My post history will show you why I'm asking. I'm 31M, and basically I've only have one friend ever since I was a teenager. For various reasons I'm very sadly no longer as close with that friend (though I very much yearn to be again).

But after school and college/university, do you think it's really possible to form those deep male friendships that are formed in teenage/early-20s years? The type where you can be totally vulnerable with them and know they care about you and have your back?

i'm asking because i'm afraid of my future husband losing his sex drive at the age of 40-50😅

Okay so I honestly don't know what to do at this point.

My boyfriend and I have been together 18 months now. Our sex life was great for the first 2-3 months we were together. Then it started slowing down, which in and of itself not horrible (though i would love it to be more frequent).

My problem is that he REFUSES to let me initiate. Like it doesn't matter if I try to initiate sex or offer to give head, he turns me down. But, he has no problem initiating on his own.

I've tried saying stuff like "after this movie, do you wanna have sex" but he didn't wanna plan it, he said he wanted it more spontaneous.

So then I tried replicating the exact ways he would initiate with me like kissing in the shower, rubbing on him in bed at night, etc. No dice. He shuts me down EVERYTIME. I've asked him repeatedly WHY he wont let me initiate but he just keeps saying "I don't know".

This has REALLY started to hurt me. Its a big deal to me that he has some unknown problem that wont allow him to accept me when i initiate ANY kind of intimacy! Ive told him its potentially relationship ending. My self esteem already wasn't great, and this whole ordeal has just tanked it into the negatives.

Ive tried dressing sexy for him, I take care of EVERYTHING in the house so he doesn't have to lift a finger at home, I make him a home cooked meal EVERY night unless we go out. I legit dont know what to do!

For a little more info on him.

He's 29, blue collar man who is athletically built. He has ZERO problem performing in the bedroom and lasting. He has no health problems that either of us are aware of.

I just really need some insight on what it could be, or how I could help him to get over whatever IT is so we can get back on track!

Early 30s here. I’ve had many doubts about my happiness in my marriage (3yrs and 10 yrs together, no kids) and I recently started to really enjoy time for myself without my partner, working out alone, having some time with guy friends and being more selfish. I also started noticing women in the streets looking at me while Im alone boosting my confidence. I know that the single life/dating can be a wild world and exhausting however I’m curious if anyone here has been through this and preferred to prioritized themselves by breaking up their marriage. My marriage is good (not perfect) im just not truly happy atm. Or is this just a phase at this age?