Hello,

Just wanted to ask some opinions as I am very confused about my sexual orientation right now. I have taken finasteride and since stopping a few months ago, my libido has remained weak. Therefore, I only feel aroused by things that are the most stimulating for me, and it is... the thought of having gay sex. This makes me anxious and lost as I have always thought I was straight, slightly bi curious at most.

Which is troubling is not the thought of being gay. It is rather that I think I have never felt attracted, or even aroused by a guy in my everyday life. I find real beauty and grace in women and when it comes to intimacy, women and not men are what I want. When I picture myself having gay sex, usually the guy is more abstract and anonymous, I can see a dick and the act in itself, but the rest is blurry. It's like in porn movies, where you see dicks but the focus is on women (as I have social anxiety, real sex was not an option for a long time and porn was at the heart of my sexuality; now I try to stop). At most I can see myself doing it with a very few super sexy actors but other guys, meh.

What I see as a problem here is not the fact gay sex may be something I would like. It's rather the fact that I want to have a long term intimate relation with a women, because I like it, but it obviously cannot work if I must meet men to fulfill my sexual desires.

Do some of you relate? Is it something that happens?

I've never dated a non binary person long enough to need to ask this question but

Im currently the boyfriend of an agender individual. During heavy talk or sex I really enjoy using the phrase "good boy" and "good girl", so now understand that I'm facing a frustration that I want to say one of those phrases so badly but can't

I'm not gonna say "good person" or "good human"

I've asked them what they'd like and I'm not getting any answer here or there, so do any of you have advice on this?

Their brain does not feel gendered, so they do openly acknowledge and accept their body that was assigned F at birth because what's important is their identity, if that helps

Im a closeted lesbian, and I want something to show I am without outing myself since I’m not able to be out. I know stuff like carabiners and double Venus necklaces are common lesbian/sapphic symbols, but I was wondering if there were others, maybe more discreet ones? I already have a carabiner on my backpack.

Trying crossdressing. So far tried pijama bodysuit. Any other ideas ?

Hi, guys.

Lately, I came out as robosexual and, during a family dinner, when my parents asked me why I hadn't a (female) partner yet, I told them I was robosexual and was waiting for fembots to be put on the market in order to find a romantic partner.

They got mad, they called me names and yelled at me. They said they think I'm crazy , and threatened me to look for a lunatic asylum which would take me in, if I continued to be a proud robosexual.

They hate technology and, let's say it, they are robophobes.

I've never been attracted to human beings and can't pretend to be allosexual.

I love my parents, but they are blatantly robophobic. I don't know what to do.

Any tips? How can I deal with my robophobic parents?

I’m a newly discovered NB, so maybe I’m missing something. .

Being asexual and sex repulsed probably compounds this problem, but I really hate looking at my body as a woman because the world sees it as sexual and most features of it are made for producing babies, and I see no other abilities it has beyond this. Since curves are considered related to sex I wish I didn't have them, I'm not interested in having kids, female bodies are shown to cry easier and have more mood swings from hormones, and female bodies are significantly weaker than males', I find the way a female body is built useless/a hinderance to me.

I was fine during puberty mostly but this problem has intensified lately and made things like bathing a little harder.

However, looking back at my life I have always identified as female, as a little girl I wore dresses and pink clothes (stereotypically female, I know, but just wanted to mention), I corrected someone who called me a boy when I wore a more masculine halloween costume as a kid, and I played as female characters in video games.

Is there any way to deal with this if not through transitioning, then? I sometimes feel like I am ethically wrong or betraying other women by having these thoughts and it makes me feel ashamed.

I'm on the ace spectrum (Orchidsexual) and whenever I know that having a crush isn't like, okay, or something is wrong with the person, I can easily do so. But I've found out with Allos, it's not that easy. Is it just an ace thing to turn your feelings off like a light switch?

Hello! Some background- I'm in my early 20s and AFAB. I dated some guys in middle/high school and it was not it for me (also high fem at the time and from a small rural area with not much diversity- alot of the guys were similar). I realized I liked girls like alot and since I didn't feel nearly the same with guys I assumed I was lesbian. Fast forward, in college realized I was attracted to some NB ppl and thought maybe this means I'm pan?

I started getting exposed to more gay culture and media after being sheltered from it for my entire life and found myself thinking that some men were attractive, but oddly enough it was mainly in M/M context. When it was M/F I wasn't really interested, and knew I was interested in F/F, but started having thoughts in the back of my head like 'I could be with a man if I was a man too' and not really sure where they were coming from or what that means. I started watching/reading more gay media including BL and saw ppl pointing out that comments along those lines coming from AFAB ppl were fetishizing gay relationships.

So I guess I'm asking is this normal or what does this mean? Have I just been consuming too much M/M content (as it felt nice to watch relatable content as in coming out and issues unique to lgbt relationships/romance but there's not as much lesbian content) and I am fetishizing subconsciously? I hope this makes sense and I haven't really thought about it the other way around (me being a man with a woman).

TLDR I'm just confused bc I'm like attracted to and okay with being with woman/NB folks as a woman myself but wasn't really into especially cis men like that until I started having thoughts that I'd be interested in being with a man as a man myself.

Hello I’m not gay but i have interest on using the back door, but i don’t know how to start. The fortín e i tried my hole hurts but i thing you can help me with tips

I'm a cis male who always liked Women, and I tried to date men for about a week, and men seem WAY easier to get a date then women.

Don't know what's the case for Bi Ladies

There are bi people with a preference, but, if you have a preference for the easier gender, what makes you even consider the other?

I’m a 16m and I think I’m experiencing sexual fluidity. And I used to only be attracted to men. And now my attraction to men decreased and my attraction to women came out of no where and feels like it might be growing. I want to hear other people experiences because I’ve been asking about this stuff and all I’ve been getting is people telling me to trust the process and that isn’t helping me. So please give me your experience with sexual fluidity did you think you were turning gay or straight? Or were you just becoming bisexual or homoflexible or heteroflexible. Or your attractions just went through a shift and went back to normal after a few months or something? Any answers are helpful.

I was scrolling through my reddit feed when a self post showed up. There's a really depressed teen asking if he's a good son or not, and he'll be kicked out if his religious family finds out. I'll comment a link to the post below.

Please, if anybody has advice or resources for him, can you help him out

Thank you

I’m thinking asexual to label myself as personally but the thing is, I experience little romantic attraction to others even sexual, regardless on whatever gender, and im bisexual so im strictly on a male or female biological attraction, but with women, I don’t feel sexually attracted to them, males, I feel sexually attracted to them but if im ever in a relationship with them I have little care for them. Women are different, im not sexually attracted to them but I can form a sense of care to them(I think I can with men but idk) also in another note I only say im Bisexual I’ll swing both ways cuz I don’t give a shit yk? But like- bru. Atp ima make up my own sexuality, it’s so confusing, and I KNOW I am not demisexual, there’s no way I am with the label it has. Help me out dude

all my life ive been able to fall for people without knowing them. as long as i form a strong bond with them i can fall in love with them. i could go 5 years and not know someone and still love them and take a bullet for them. i thought it might be demi sexual but thats saying i need to know them. so im not familiar what this is

I'm kind of unsure of my exact sexuality right now, i went by bisexual for a while but it kind of felt wrong. Pretty much i'm attracted to both men and women sexually, but i havent really had a crush on a man besides a pre HRT trans man and part of me makes me feel like i'm not ACTUALLY bi if i haven't had a crush on a cisgender male. I'd honestly date anyone as long as they showed some attraction to me, i had a girl i was initially friends with and didnt find attractive but i started gathering feelings months into the friendship and i feel like if i dated someone i would definitely end up dating feelings even if they were a guy So i would date a guy (or just anyone in general) i just havent really had a crush on a cis guy yet and that makes me feel like i'm not actually bi

Part of me feels like i'm actually just straight and i'm just trying to be in a community and be different but i feel like the fact i've been sexually attracted to men kind of debunks that, so i've just been unlabeled for a little while now

Do i stay unlabeled, does bisexual still fit this or am i some other thing?

So I’m a 16m. And I’ve always been attracted to men from a young age. But lately my attraction to men started going down and now I might be feeling things for women but it’s clouded by a lot of stress. And I’m getting sick of people telling me that I should just trust the process. I want someone to share their experience and how they felt and what they thought like maybe things like you thought that you were turning straight or gay or asexual and you were just turning bisexual or pansexual. And also how long it took you to figure things out through this fluidity. I would appreciate any answers.

I was just curious, what happens if your birth name is more gender neutral? Do you keep it because it is gender neutral? Or change it in order to express a new identity?

P.s. I don’t know if this question is too personal or anything. If it is too nosy, just tell me, and I can delete this post.

Not coming out for my family very much weighing on me, especially because it’s been almost 3 years since I came out to my mom, my stepdad my sister and my cousin as Pam and I’ve told the same people that I am trans, but I’ve not told anyone else and it’s really weighing on me and it’s hard. What should I do?

So recently I’ve really liked it when people use they/them pronouns for me cuz it just makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. And I’ve also really liked it when people have started using a nickname for me that Isn’t my birth name. Right now I still identify as a cis female, but I’m starting to think that this may be a sign of something. What do you think it could be a sign of because I am so stumped rn.

here

Okay so for the longest time I thought a lesbian was a woman that liked other women. And recently came out as non-binary to a lesbian friend of my, and she asked if I'm a lesbian (I'm not), but now I can't figure what a lesbian is technically, I did some research online, but I'm still not sure can anyone here tell me please?

So I’ve been using she/they pronouns for a while now and I still identify as a female. I’ve been starting to like when people use they more because it just makes me feel happy inside for no reason. So my question is can I switch over to people mainly using they pronouns for me even if I’m still identifying as a cis female?

The titel says it all.

When I got a Positive answer to my resume I was over the moon and didn't realise it right away and so also not corrected them in my answer.

After that I took a look at my first Email to them and my resume and there it was, no Pronouns in the address bar.

Since my Boyfriend helpt me with it befor I sent it I emidietly suspected him and he admitted to doing it with the excuse "something like that doesn't really belong in an application"

I laid into him how angry this made me and especally since he did not disscus the remuval with me, he just did it. and not the first time he deleted something important from my resume since he taught "something like that doesn't really belong in an application"

in that case it was

"It is also important that my old name appears on the certificates sent. I ask for your understanding in this regard."

but I lukely noticed and put it back.

Yes I know that I could have noticed it befor sending but I trusted him.

Now I really don't know how to feel about him. I feel like he broke my trust and the misgendering especially hurt since I finally got my legal name and gender change literally last month.

Your insides and words would be appreciated

Edit: I sent him this Post but blocked him again since I currently don't trust myself to stay reasonable with him

I feel like i made my question pretty clear in the title. By non binary identities, i mean any kind of identity that doesn't go under boy or girl

I've labeled myself as asexual for 2-3 years since I was a teen (I'm 18 now) but recently I've been questioning everything because someone had told me I'm a "fake ace" and I shouldn't label myself as such, so I'm here to ask what I truly am because I know there many different aces but idk anything about them... So let me explain

So Ive had sex about 3 times, I mean penetration (I'm male) But I never really enjoyed it I only did it for my partner, it actually kinda repulses me when I think about sex. The thing is I can give oral sex to a women but I don't want to be sexually touched in anyway, I can't kiss her (no tounge) I can't hug her, I can cuddle her, I can give oral or finger her but I don't enjoy having traditional sex, obviously I will because I've done it before but I will only do it if it's someone I am looking to be with forever but even then I'm not going to enjoy it.

Basically what I want to know is where and what I am on the ace spectrum and I feel like this is the best place to do that. Thank you :)

is it alright to be both? i hope this isn't a dumb question... i asked one of my friends and he told me to "pick a struggle", i know he's just joking but i'm kinda embarrassed to ask any further.. like, i love women but i don't LOVE them, if that makes sense. (english isn't my first language so i don't know how to express it, sorry)

Hii, I (f) have been questioning for some time and i'm just confuseddd help.

So I think i'm aroace/aroacespec but a few things keep coming up in my thoughts that make me unsure.

For the most part I haven't felt any sexual/romantic attraction but there are 2 instances in which I am not sure if I was attracted to someone:

When I was younger I thought I liked this guy who I was very close friends with. I really enjoyed his company and wanted to spend time with him and I think I had feelings, but I am not sure if they were just platonic because I didn't want to do any typical relationship activities. We drifted apart (still in the same friend group but we didn't talk as much) a bit for around a year, but then we got into a relationship and I didn't enjoy it - it was like I didn't feel like I was "supposed" to when we held hands, when he said i love you, etc. But I'm not sure if I actually feel romantic feelings before the relationship (even if I didn't desire things like hand holding or sharing a future with him) as I did feel feelings. I would be super excited to see him, i would think about him, when we spent time together i would be really really happy - almost nervous, and I felt like we really clicked. I'm not sure if the feelings were platonic or romantic since that was probably my first close friendship after a long while of being lonely and maybe I was just genuinely excited to have a friend? Yet it felt like it could be romantic.

But I never felt any aesthetic attraction to him (or any other guy, not even celebrities (i think i have liked some female celebrities though?)), and I never wanted to do anything. I wanted to be his no.1 friend with almost a sizzling intensity.

Meanwhile recently, there's this girl and I think she's legit stunning. I would actually want to do romantic things with her and stuff and she's often on my mind. I feel like I match all the objective "symptoms" of attraction like wanting to engage in physical contact (which i usually despise), i'm happy whenever i talk to her, i've dreamt of her multiple times, i want to look good when i see her, etc. But I don't feel anything. It's like I'm as empty inside as I've always been. Like maybe I just admire her?

Also, any feelings i felt for the guy were more intense when I was thinking about him whereas the girl more when I'm actually around her. And in both cases I can/could almost "make" myself feel things for them by listening to really expressive music and thinking about them (idk if that makes sense?).

I don't know who I was/am potentially attracted to and it is giving me confusion about my identity.

thank you for any ideas!!

Basically what the title says. My best friend (pansexual, genderfluid), has an older brother (FtM) "Sam", who I see a lot and love. He's always been really nice to me. They have unaccepting parents, and therefore are very feminine presenting. Every year they host a huge Christmas party at their house (it was last night), and they all dress up. Sam was wearing a pretty dress, makeup, heels, etc. He looked really pretty, but I wasn't sure if it would be transphobic to say so? So I didn't say anything, but I wish I could have. Any advice is highly appreciated!

EDIT: Thank you all so much for the answers! I think I'll just stick with more gender neutral compliments in the future. This has been really educational though, thank you all for your perspectives!

Hey guys, Knucklehead here. I need help figuring out what my gender identity is. So ive noticed over the past few weeks that ive been showing both Feminine and Masculine versions of myself. when i am full of energy i tend to be more Masculine. When im tired or burnt out, i tend to be Feminine. when its inbetween, i have been known to show both. when i sit, sometimes i show more masculine poses and sometimes its feminine. but heres the kicker, everytime i lay down, every time i sleep, its always feminine. friends and family have told me that. I feel both masculine and Feminine constantly and i didnt know that it was irregular for men until recently. Now that i have realized this, i need help with a gender identity, or a term for this mix and match i go through that isnt Genderfluid, or Non-binary. Thank you guys. -Knucklehead.