I have had enough enough why isn't God if he exists helping me every time I decide I will finally do something good with my life he says no u don't deserve it let's put you in a course you hate and a goddamn shitty college .I am tired of having to do things which I don't wanna do again and goddamn again .People like to lecture me on self respect but don't let me take my decisions .man I am legit crying all day for like a week now nothing is suppressing it .I wanna go away from here and go to some forest or some shit

I have good friends, my mom cares about me, yet I still stand at death's door. I have a problem that has lasted for 3 YEARS (that I know of, maybe it's longer) that someone has a sick obsession with me and tries just to ruin my life in all ways. The place I got a job at a year ago, someone "anonymously" reported them for something and the firm fell apart. Lol, the week I started there someone reported them. I was getting death threats from private numbers, From fake profiles. Fake profiles of me keep popping up everywhere. My love life has been a nightmare for a year, and I get messages from fake profiles asking me if I "broke up with my boyfriends" every time I face a break up. I can't take it anymore. I dont know how this person always finds out who I'm dating or who even the person doing this is... I just know it's going to keep happening till I end my life. Also my health is shit, I take meds that give me bad side effects and all in all this has to stop.

I know things are getting bad when I can’t even enjoy the things I love. What is my purpose in life? I go forward a step just to get forced back two, again and again. Why does nothing at all bring me joy. My friends don’t care, my family barely does. I haven’t had a girlfriend or love interest since I was a teenager, I met someone when I was on holiday but it wasn’t meant to be. All I want to do is lay in my bed and imagine I’m living a good life in another world. Why am I meant to suffer so much? Is it the same for everyone or just a few of us? It’s so fucking tiring and I’m fed up of cutting myself every other month just to feel something on than pain in my mind. Why is this my punishment I life? What do I have to do just to be on the right path

I had a drug overdose, my eyes went Black, I run to took a bath and suddenly all the lights on the whole quarter went out, I looked through the windows and Saw the moon was yellow and fading, I run naked in the corridors askin for help and the neyghbours saw my desperation, for a second I didnt threw me off the windows, right now I'm in a psiquiatric hospital, I'm so ashamed and alone

idk if i’m going to post this, it’s my first reddit post and i don’t use this app at all but i feel like i just need advice on this. i’m so ashamed and disgusted with myself every time i remember i feel like im going to pass out. ig consequences of my own actions? i didn’t know wtf i was doing. context is when i was very young, i used to use omegle and usually at night. at first it was simple curiosity but i soon realized the men on this app gave me so much attention, saying i was pretty and whatnot. this made me so happy as a self conscious child. my stomach is twisting and turning just writing this out. i haven’t told this to anyone in my life, never have and they will never know this is me. but anyway, soon i realized this attention satisfied me because i grew up without it. eventually things escalated to a more sexual aspect. i exposed myself so much to grown disgusting men, men who took screenshots and pictures and sent them to me after, men who never showed their face, men who probably posted these pictures on cp websites. i want to die. i always get so nauseous thinking about it, i barely remember half of what i was doing. i really didn’t. i think to myself, what the fuck have i done. i have ruined myself and it makes me sick inside. no one knows how fucking disgusting i am and it slightly puts me at ease that they don’t. i don’t know what im saying and im just blindly typing away at this, but i feel like im truly about to pass out. what if my future job does a background check and they find that? what the genuine fuck will i do then? i dont know at all. i’m so scared. i’m so worried. i’m so ashamed. what do i do? do i even post this? idfk. i don’t know what to think or do. if anyone in my life finds out about this im done, i dont know what ill do to myself. how do i even begin to process this?

I sometimes feel like I'm being dramatic - other people I know did the same only slightly older, and don't seem to struggle nearly as much as I do.

However, it's not that common anymore - this was in the UK in the mid 00s, so it was becoming increasingly rare for such young children to be sent away to school. I don't know if many people can really relate, so I can't tell how much of my depression anxiety stems from that.

For as long as I can remember, I've felt completely useless. I was having serious bouts of depression all through my teenage years, and can remember sitting in music lessons just weeping to my teachers rather than getting any practice or learning done, I think because it was the only place where I'd have an adult to talk to.

I feel ungrateful, because obviously here in the UK being sent to one of these schools means you're made for life, both socially and professionally. But I can't help but feel it's seriously impaired my abilty to function as a normal human being. I just feel there is no background stability I can lean on - no real home or sense of family. I remedied that by being as academically sucessful as I possibly could, which worked for a while, but within a few years of university I was so burned out, I basically fell apart again. And I still had no real friends or family, and no real sense of who I was as a person, underneath all that.

and that's still how I feel, 10 years later. Life feels more difficult the more time goes on.

Im turning 18 next year but I still feel like I just turned 13, maybe even younger than that and sometimes I find myself envying the lives that children live because I know I won't ever have a guardian figure in my life to teach me how to do basic things without constant scrutiny and physical abuse, even in the school grades department I lack the most and have no academic skill whatsoever. I literally remember being punished almost daily because of my low grades in primary school and being forced to do math worksheets at home which were way out of my grade level at the time as even more punishment, 7 year old me really tried his best to understand what square roots meant while being told by my mother that I'll grow up homeless and be kidnapped by gang members. And even now that I'm in the 11th grade (it's considered the first year of college here) I still do poorly on my tests and exams despite trying my best to study to land a 90 atar and get into a really good university and study some stem subject even though I don't want to go to university at all and I just don't know if I'm really cut out to live like everyone else is anymore, I get so jealous of people who are smarter than me or more better looking than me that I just feel like choking myself to death. I really have been born useless on this earth and I don't know how to improve, I don't know where to go, what to do and I don't even know if I'll make it until my next birthday. How do I make my parents proud of me for once in my life?

I wanna kill myself soon I’m 16 This post may be tmi For the past 2 years I’ve felt no physical attraction to anyone I’ve had libido or attraction. My hormones are normal I’m off my old meds and it’s not those. I thought I was gay as I had attraction to other men. Now I have nothing. I fear I’m asexual I’ll never want sex. I’ll never have a relationship. I’d rather be dead than be asexual. I’ve been prescribed Wellbutrin that can help libido but I have no hope it will work. I hate my body. I’m gonna kill myself soon. I can’t take this anymore I just wanna die.

I’ve been fighting with some serious depression for the last 6 months straight and im just so desperate for it to end. Strangely enough I don’t actually want to die and I don’t wanna unalive myself, I just want to feel joy again and have my own life. An influx of traumatic events had happened around 6 months ago and I still haven’t healed. I’ve done a month of group therapy, tried exercised, journaling, allowing myself to feel the sadness and I just feel like I can’t seem to get to the other side of this. I’m scared im gonna feel like this forever or that it’s going to take me so long to get back to myself. I will literally do anything to feel better. Unfortunately ive had bad experiences with SSRIs so they’re off the table. I just want to figure this out. I’ve never felt so lost and disregulated in my mind ever before in my life. If anyone has any advice or can empathize with me please let me know. I feel so alone right now.

enjoy my dumpster fire: last year, i was diagnosed with mdd during my junior year of high school. i ended up in psych ward. my grades were dropping and the school was threatening to send me to court over attendance. to cope with the stress, i relied on drugs, mainly mary jane. i did shrooms once on january and ended up in a bad trip. as a consequence, i started hearing voices from time to time. i stopped smoking in may (locking in for AP exams) and was stress free during summer (doing nothing) and was hallucination-free. I started smoking again in June. It was until this month when I had a visual hallucination for the first time (flashing light/figure moving and i had to ask my brother if he saw it).

earlier this year, i was a mess. i was constantly walking on bridges and contemplating life. i ditched school and decided to repaint the house, so i was hauling a gallon of paint home (no car). my summer was chill as i did nothing, but i cleaned up most of my act. i started doing nails again and decided to do a deep cleaning and finish repainting the house. i cleaned 10 trash bags of junk out and he house. my house was hoarder like…and i slept in a bed with old trash. but a bed is a bed (even though my brother says i only sleep on a mattress lol). now i’m in a slump. my house is still a half painted mess with trash everywhere. i haven’t been doing homework and didn’t show up to school (junior year activities). 1 year of high school and i’m out of that circus. still a hot mess though.

oh yeah, mental illness runs in my moms side. aunt has delusions about some organization wanting to persecute her family. grandma with anger issues. mom has a history of depression and paranoia of others wanting to harm her.

anyways thanks for reading my dump. it’s 5 am and i haven’t slept yet. i need to actually do go do homework. cheers!

Not having a job is honestly killing me. I no longer have hope. I’ve done so many interviews that I can read interviewers’ body language and tell when it’s not going well. When the interview ends, the depression washes over me.

My psychiatrist has prescribed Lamotrigine, Quetiapine, Clonazepam, Diazepam, Propranolol, and Oxazepam, which I take throughout the day for my generalised anxiety disorder and major depression disorder. She believes we should start from scratch by trying different combinations, as I’ve been like this since I was 12. It has affected every aspect of my life, including my academic performance.

This year has been horrible. And I know I wrote a lot.

Lets start with term 1.

My school has this programme where 2 year 9 classes go to a small town each term. My grade has 8 classes. I went term 1, and it was a disaster. My school has multiple campuses. So my house had three x-best friends from my campus and a 4 from another campus.

It was a long bus trip there. I sat next to Friend A, talking about stuff and being annoyed by typical guys in our grade. You know the type.

So we arrived. I was surprised by everything. I met the GWs. The first night, I tried to be quieter and helpful, like doing everyone's dishes. We cooked together that night—tacos.

During the next week, everyone started settling in, and we got to know each other a lot more. I could definitely feel the separation between us and the GWs. It was kinda awkward. Most nights, Friend B, Friend C, and I would sit and talk together (I had my own room). Friend C would say that the GWs were being mean. I would defend them because I felt like I couldn't make a judgment about them after just a week of living together. They didn’t know us, and we didn’t know them.

Over the next few weeks, we did get to know them better. Friend B and Friend C dismissed their flaws and became quite friendly with them. I stayed vigilant because I could see their flaws and the type of people they were.

I put up some Taylor Swift album cover posters I printed myself, and Friend C said she would burn them (obviously, she didn’t since that wouldn't be allowed). I was missing home and wanted to give my room a personal touch. I’m mentioning this because my music preferences somehow became a big deal.

I like Taylor Swift, and I get that not everyone does, but this music thing turned into a bad reflection of who these people, and Friend C, really were. The GWs liked Drake and Kanye. I hate their music. At first, I tolerated it, but when I asked to play some of my music, Friend C and the GWs said no. Why? Because no one likes Taylor and she "sucks." I was shocked Friend C agreed. I never said horrible things about their music, respecting their choices, but they couldn’t respect mine.

They started loudly discussing a line from one of Kanye’s songs: "I might still have sex with Taylor because I made that bitch famous." Who is proud of their favorited artist saying that? For context, it refers to when Kanye took the mic from Taylor Swift at the VMAs, interrupting her acceptance speech, claiming that Beyoncé had the best video. That’s where "making her famous" comes from—by being rude to her.

On Wednesdays and Sundays, we had a big clean, which takes a few hours. You’re only allowed one computer for music, so I had to listen to music I hated for hours because they blasted it so loud I could hear it over a vacuum.

During weeks 2-5, I was dealing with my own struggles. I’ve been told all my life I’m fat and ugly, and I believe it. I wanted to reset at X town and eat clean food. When I suggested we didn’t need to buy so many biscuits and ice cream, no one listened. I didn’t push it because I was fed up with the GWs and Friend C at this point.

They constantly belittled me and made me miserable, picking on everything I did. Their favourite thing was to blame me for everything that went wrong in the house—never considering it could have been someone else. They’d accuse me of mixing wet and dry cloths or using their bathroom. No matter how many times I told them it wasn’t me, they didn’t believe me.

Friend B was my support through this. We had some nice conversations when I was feeling low, especially since my relationship with my parents is rocky at best.

The mimicking. Every. Single. Day. I got mad and stormed upstairs, slamming my door, yelling, "You guys are fucking bitches." I’m not proud of that, but they were pushing me to one of the lowest points in my life. I walked into the pit several times, and they were talking about me or mimicking me. It was really hurtful, especially when Friend B, the one person I had on my side, sometimes joined in. I felt alone and kind of abandoned. I can’t really explain it.

Now onto the part you’re probably curious about—the "food poisoning" incident. I didn’t give anyone food poisoning. It’s true I made spaghetti Bolognese (with no help, I might add), and two of the GWs vomited after eating it. It might’ve looked like I did something, but these facts prove it wasn’t food poisoning:

1. I ate the same food and didn’t throw up.
2. I ate a bit later than them, so it might’ve been a smell that triggered it (I researched this).
3. The cook (the one who organizes the dinners) tried it and said it was fine.

Also, they saw me make it. I ran out of the house, went to the oval, and cried because I was overwhelmed, tired, angry, and hurt. Looking back, it’s sad. I was overwhelmed by the accusations, tired because I hadn’t been sleeping well, angry that they thought I’d do something like that, and hurt that they believed I would—either by accident or on purpose. I was saddened by my experience at X town.

Later that night, a staff member checked on me and told me how out of line the others were. During karaoke night, I rushed upstairs, wanting to be alone for obvious reasons, but no. They called me into the pit to lecture me about "being careful" and not "poisoning people"—a lot of terrible things I don’t want to put in writing.

This leads to the cooking situation. One evening near the end of X town, the ordered food didn’t arrive, and I was rostered to cook. I had to make dinner with whatever we had. I suggested mac and cheese, but no. I had to cook plain pasta, mince, and mac and cheese by myself. I only had half an hour. I worked hard and clearly needed help managing three meals. But when I asked for help washing up, they told me, "You clean it, that’s what we all did." Then I spent an hour cleaning up on my own.

I was so depressed at X-town. I have not been the same since

So yeah thats that.

Term 2 was kind of normal, although as usual I was that person in the grade that gets picked on constantly. I had to deal with friend C but at least I had a large firiend group and people who I thought gave a shit about me.

Term 3 (here shit gets real)- There was a boy in my friend group. I was not close with him. But at 14, he committed suicide at the start of term 3. For weeks I was really depressed. I wish I could have helped him. I had no idea he was depressed. My group and I made a support group chat. Oh course Friend C was in it. The chat got out of control, and it turned into everyone hating me, calling me names and attention seeking because I sent the above stuff about X town in the group chat. Admittingly I shouldn't have done that. This was weeks after btw. I tried to support them the best I could. I was trying to make everyone understand why I didnt like Friend C.

I haven't been doing well recently. My dad has become increasingly mad and unhappy. He takes it out on me. He has hit me multiple times and he genuinely terrifies me. My mum is more of a verbal parent. She loves to argue with me. Both of them have told me that I need to do exercise, and once I do some they tell me it is not enough, even if I tell them I feel shitty. I know im overweight so maybe it is warranted. Dad has told me if I don't put my electronics in the living room he will "make me suffer". He scares me so much. I have tried talking to mum about being depressed. I have told her that my life sucks and she says it doesn't. She is coming from the perspective that as my family is very privelaged, I shouldn't hate my life.

I have 2 older brothers. Mum is away. They have been unbearable, especially my eldest brother. Dad and him go on and on about how I don't achieve as they did and that I don't do much about the house. Maybe that's because I have 4 assessments in a week and I am stressed and tired because I cant sleep. Either I dont work on school and help around the house and get yelled at for bad grades, or the opposite, study and not help around the house and get yelled at.

The only real friends I have is my hockey team. I didn't play well towards the end of the season because of obvious reasons, when I told them they understood. I also have another friend who is so great because I relate to her so much and she is so helpful.

I have no motivation to do anything. I just want to sleep eat and play chess all day. I want to die, but I also want to live. I want to know what life is meant to be like. I also know the pain of losing someone, and I dont want to cause that on any one else. I wake up at 6am for scholl and just want to go back to sleep forever. I have not told anyone expect 1 person about me cutting myself. No one knows hoe depressed I am. I am to scared. I dont want anyone to know but I also do. I want people to stop treating me so horribly. I hate school. I am constantly being picked on. If only they knew how it makes me want to curl up in a ball, listen to my sad playlist hug my pets and cry. What do I do? And no, I cant talk to a therapist or the school counsellor because I dont want my parents finding out for obvious reasons.

hey everyone, so. i have been dealing with depressive episodes for a long time now, (got diagnosed when i was like 14 ish ?? now im 21), i’ve been off meds for about two/three years now but during these episodes i have the absolute lowest sex drive. i know myself and know that i can push through, but how can you explain that to my SO in a way she’ll understand ? it’s so hard , im in a serious and long term relationship going on three years but sometimes i feel like she doesn’t understand how i feel. she is so supportive and so sweet, but i can’t help but feel pressure to get myself back together when she mentions it. im a survivor of SA as well and we’ve talked about this extensively and how it affects our sex life, but depression not so much. it’s so difficult when all you want is to give your person everything they want and deserve but i just feel so trapped within myself. and she does everything she can to adjust and understand and be there for me, shes so supportive. i just don’t know what to do when these depressive bouts come about- i don’t know how to communicate how im feeling in a way that doesnt sound catastrophic or like it has anything to do with her. like im so numb to everything ? but that doesn’t mean i don’t want to have sex, my body is just off right now? how do you manage saying that when these random bouts come and there’s really no rhyme or reason? anyone out there in a long term relationship struggling with this? how do you manage?

Hi everyone. I hope this makes sense and I hope someone can help me understand what I am feeling here.

It’s very hard to keep my head above water most days. So I try to find happiness in the smallest of things.

But when I hear about people’s pain and suffering or I hear about animals passing or worse. I get very upset.

Generally I am empathetic but what I feel is so intense. That I want to help people. I feel this at the expense of reason sometimes and I feel it’s not normal.

I imagine myself in their place asking for help and I want to be able to help. This is for people who are essentially arms length who I have no immediate connection to.

What is wrong with me? Is there a name for what I am feeling?

Many thanks.

Bueno la verdad no se ni por donde empezar tengo 22 años desde chico sufri abusos sexuales de un vecino, mi mama me cagaba a palo y me decia cosas hirientes, (no la juzgo ahora la entiendo ella se crio sin su papa y tmb fue abusada, despues entendi y la perdone)de esos abusos sexuales me quedaron bastantes traumas y como que estoy o estaba bastante hipersexualizado siempre la quiero poner o me quiero descargar de mis problemas con cosas sexuales aunque ahora ya no tanto, ademas de eso tengo un complejo muy grande que es el tamaño de mi pene, tengo descendecia asiatica por parte de mi mama y por si no saben los asiaticos la tienen muy chica jaja lo peor de todo es que soy alto y encima negro (las mujeres piensan que tengo tremendo pingo y no nada que ver todo lo contrario) al momento del acto la verdad es muy frustante ver sus caras y me siento muy insuficiente y no vengan con que el tamaño no importa y bla bla por que aunque les chupes bien la cajeta entiendo yo que las mujeres quieren algo que las llene por dentro que sientan algo con el pito chiquito y encima finito que tengo no sienten nada (me mide 13 cm pero es un muy finito) mi cuerpo no encaja con mi tamaño digamos, soy alto un poco gordito y negro jaja y se que no todo en la vida es sexo pero es algo muy frustrante ya que en mi familia de parte de mi papa son todos mujeriegos y tengo como ese no se que de querer seguir el legado aunque se que no voy a poder jajaj, vivo con mis papas, no trabajo y soy un mantenido de mierda estoy todo el dia acostado con una depresion muy grande, me siento un inutil y me odio bastante, soy muy extrovertido aunque me fui haciendo asi de tantos años encerrado y no salir, no tengo amigos, mucho menos pareja, quiero ayudar a mis viejos al menos a hacer algo pero tmb tengo otra cosa mas, problemas de salud... en los dos testiculos varicocele e hidrocele y la verdad es una tortura vivir con esto me molesta demasiado fui a los urologos varias veces y me dicen que no tengo nada solo eso ya ni se que pensar si me hicieron brujeria o que jaja siempre creo que tengo algo mas que eso pero me dicen que no, tengo entendido que el varicocele no jode mucho y a mi ya me esta volviendo loco, pienso que tengo algo mas grave, perdon si escribo mal o esta mal redactado la verdad es para desahogarme y si alguien me daria un consejo o un animo me seria de gran ayuda, en mi casa la situacion economica esta muy compleja y quiero ayudar a mi familia a pesar de todo son los unicos que estan conmigo dia a dia y me apoyan, mis papas ya son grandes y siento una presion e impotencia al verme asi, pero la verdad no quiero ni salir a la calle, vivo todo el dia en mi pieza con el celular o durmiendo ( aunque pise la calle no soy un "gil" tuve mis secuencias y viviencias callejeras, vivo en un barrio, hice mis movidas bueno eso no viene al caso) en fin siento que ya no doy mas y quiero ponerle fin a mi vida ahorcarme o pegarme un tiro no se siento que no tengo arreglo

friends.. girlfriend.. everyone who I loved left me. I am alone for a long time. I have severe depression, alcoholic, panic disorder.. I am just useless, who makes person who come closed to me just unpleasant and uncomfortable. I want to die. but I don't have enough encouragement to die.

I hate my life. Everything about it, my job, the country where I live, my body, my mind that's always messing with me. But I have no idea how to change this. I can't move out, because I am an immigrant and i am waiting for my citizenship. I cant change jobs because i had a hard time finding one, and I desperately need it for the citizenship. I tried changing my body, i have a personal trainer and a gym membership, but i have lost all will and motivation to exercise (even though I had a lot of progress already). I tried going to therapy, but after 1 sesion i realised that i cant stand it. I have constant thoughts of suicide, going to bed hoping that i dont wake up. Constant headaches and a terrible mood. The only thing that ever brought me joy, are video games, but I cant make a life from this. I drive home every night thinking " why dont i just smash into this wall, see what happens". I cant talk to my parents about it, because my mom is in a similar situation (way less amplified though) and my dad has no empathy for this sort of thing. The biggest problem, is that i have a good life. I live in the south of France (moved here from Russia), i come from a rich family, anything i want, I can have, either by buying it myself or asking my dad. I am in a privileged position and yet I am numb. I don't smile, I don't enjoy life like I used to. I am sitting at work, writing this, and the only thing i want to do, is cry.

I have no idea what to do. I am terrified of killing myself, living under the assumption that this life can become better. I have no one to talk about this with. I have friends, but they are online friends, living far away, and talking doesn't seem to help.

Everyday I am wishing for an asteroid or some sort of event to wipe me out, so that this can end, but I am not the 1 who deals the final blow

When I was around 13 years old, I was walking with my friend Dominic, when these 2 amazingly beautiful girls walk up to him, and give him these big passionate hugs. Having been bullied for years, and called ugly many times, I saw this and just felt heartbroken. I wanted girls to do that to me so bad, but they never did. He introduces me to them, and they look at me like I am gross...a look I got all the time from girls. They start to walk away, and he tells them "Hey, my friend didn't get a hug" and they reluctantly walk over to me, and the one girl with long Brunette hair, puts her arms around me and her finger tips touch behind me, but no part of her actually touches me. It was such a horrible feeling, and such a heartless thing to do. It made me feel so ugly. After they walk away, Dom tells me the Blonde girl came over his house yesterday, knocked on his door and asked him to take her virginity and that they had amazing sex...I was already sick from what just happened, but hearing that just killed my soul. I felt so much pain in that moment. I also felt an intense fear...I was scared that I would never know what that feels like, and that fear came true. I have been rejected my whole life, and here am 30 years later at the age of 43, feeling exactly the same way I did as a teenager. I am afraid I will have to go another 30 years having never felt love.

Basically I’m just needing to process things and I’m not sure where else to do so. I haven’t been to a doc in maybe 5 years? (The only time my family tried to get me help was when the school forced them to. And the psychiatrists had a field day with me lmao, slapped me with like 7 different mental issues and a $500 bill before I had to go back to school, needless to say we never went back)

Now that I’m an adult, my family has succeeded in letting me become my own problem and denying the fact that they were responsible for me to begin with. The only time they want to think of me is to praise themselves for “how well they raised me.” And now I don’t know where to begin. At all. I don’t have insurance or money, so we don’t exactly have a great deck of cards to begin with.

My physical health isn’t great and I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I find myself hoping whatever is going on is killing me. That way my family can’t blame me for my death later on since it was “natural causes”. I’ll even try researching what may be wrong with me & I’ll get disappointed/angry if I read it’s not fatal. I have an autoimmune disorder that makes simple tasks a bitch and a half to accomplish, and all these things feel like too much work at a certain point

So recently my ex cheated then left me. She’s the only person I’ve told about my mental health stuff(SH & attempt). She said she resented me for opening up and I shouldn’t have gone to her.

I’m going back into old habits of drinking heavily to sleep. When I don’t I lay in bed thinking of what I had and don’t sleep. I feel like I should just peace out now. My niece is young enough to not remember me so it’s less selfish. I feel like she’s be the only one other then my pug that would miss me.

Part of me wants to talk with my family for some kind of help but what if they resent me too

recently i’ve been feeling down and unaccomplished. i’m 24 with no job, no car, no license, no money, no sleep schedule, no energy, im overweight, and i have no motivation. I can be awake for 5 minutes after sleeping 6 hours, and then immediately go back to sleep for another 6 hours. People wake me up during the day but I don’t remember it. I’m on wellbutrin(~10 years), klonopin(~10 years), strattera(~2), sertraline(~3), and i don’t know if anything is helping. I stopped taking iron and magnesium supplements, so I can get my blood tested and see if i have any deficiencies and get recommendations from a doctor for supplements/vitamins. I’ve never had a real job, only online gigs where i never had a ‘manager’ or someone directly to report to. it’s not that i’m not applying places, it’s that people with better experiences are taking an online position and i can’t even make my way to a location if i wanted to. I think it’s okay right now, only because I watch my nephew everyday from 7am to 5pm for my sister that teaches, so having a 9-5 even online isn’t feasible with a 6 month old. I spend my money places i know i will be happy at, mainly concerts. But after this most recent concert i can only think about what i didn’t do, rather than what went on around me. it could’ve been because i was paranoid about getting home late on public transport, or i didn’t want to act a fool around my boyfriend. i did want to act a fool. i wanted to go absolutely crazy for a band that saved my life but i still hold myself back in certain times when im already feeling down.

so if anyone has tips on motivation, energy, gaining back the zest for life, anything, im free to take all that information in. 🧷

I sleep 12 hours per day and I am still tired. Simple tasks make me exhausted. I am able to make myself go to the gym, but when I come back it's lights out, I'm completely useless. I have a pretty decent diet, take supplements etc and have been on the same medication from some time now (just different dosages). What can I do? I am lucky that I am not working at the moment (also because of my depression yay), but what about when I have to go back? There are days I literally cannot leave my bed; I still do it out of shame, but sometimes it just doesn't work. Anyone went through something like this? Any tips?

Hey, So I have had depression and anxiety for about 30 years and I've noticed that people treat me so terribly, like I'm some kind of monster. I believe that 30 years of depression has deformed my face, does anyone else feel like this?

Cant stand myself anymore. I hurt the people I love. I feel like I'm drowning

Hi, not sure if this is the right place to post this. Really sorry if this isn't it, it's my first time using Reddit.

When people see me, they always comment about how much I smile and how cheerful I look. Even when I went overseas, kids looked at me with curiosity when I smile. But this isn't who I am, at least for the past year. Recently, I just finished college and I was pretty excited about it, but now I feel like I'm depressed. Nothing motivates me, nothing makes me happy for more than a few minutes, and I don't feel like doing anything at all. I've recently been quick to anger as well even over the smallest things.

I've tried exercising but the current state of my health doesn't allow me to yet. I can't do meditation due to the noisy nature of my current environment. I can't even talk to anyone because I've pretty much become obsolete to people I have considered to be my friends. (Not to rant or anything, but over the past 3 years, only 2 out of my hundreds of friends remained in contact with me and greeted me a happy birthday, even newly made college friends simply became classmates). I'd sort of understand since everyone is getting busy with college, some with work, and some of them have just made new friends, but how do I know if I'm simply the problem? I've tried making new friends with small groups of people, but it seems like I'm always the outlier.

This next part is going to sound a bit cringe and cliche, you can just skip over it.

!I've recently listened to Zhou Tzuyu's song Fly, and this song made me tear up. I haven't cried for over 5 years, and I really think I'm at my breaking point. Yes, I'm a guy who used to bench press 200+lbs and this song was what made me cry. The song mostly talks about growth, freedom and being brave. But I really don't know what to do at this point. I feel completely lost and also feel like I've totally become unaware of who I even am. I haven't slept over the past week and I simply cried in bed. Even as I'm typing these words, tears are running down, maybe because of all the pent up emotions? Just a few days ago my heart rate went over 110bpm. !<

Honestly at this point, I can't even tell why I'm feeling down. Is it because of my lack of goals and aspirations? Is it because I simply have not found out what or who I want to be? Is it more of the loneliness that I am feeling? Is it all these combined?

I've been trying to shrug it off, but I just can't.

I just don't know what to do.

this guy was stood with a few of his mates and he said “who’s that girl with the big butt” and he then said this when I turned around, it’s completely ruined my self esteem and confidence and I don’t know how to cope with what he said. I have a prominent nose and a prominent chin, I never used to have problems with the way I look but now it’s just a huge problem and it affects me almost everyday. I feel like I don’t look perfect I won’t leave my house. That comment broke me; and it’ll stay with me for the rest of my life.

I lost someone important to me. I don't really know whose fault it is but I know my brain's going to make me blame it on myself whether it's logical or not. For the first time in years I woke up in the middle of the night crying and I can't stop. I just want things to get better. I've been getting help/going through treatment but this has just hit me especially hard since it's someone I've cared about for 20 of my almost 34 years.

I came across an article talking about some recent research published in cell, which has found that a key mechanism linking stress to gut inflammation involves the body's Brunner's glands.

Brunner's Glands: Basically these glands sit along the duodenum (a tube that connects the stomach to the small intestine) and secrete mucus. One job of the mucus is to protect the lining of our digestive tract.

Discovery: The research has found that the Brunner's glands are triggered to secrete mucus by signals sent from the amygdala via vagus nerve. Tests on mice showed that stress interferes with this pathway and causes less mucus to be released. This also reduced the number of good gut bacteria present, and increased inflammation indicators.

If you're interested in learning more, I would start with this article in Nature: paywalled / not paywalled

There was a post in  : https://www.reddit.com/r/science/comments/1erc91e/researchers_at_the_icahn_school_of_medicine_have/ , but it didn't generate much conversation.

hello! I'm a grade 12 senior highschool student. I am diagnosed with major depressive disorder and anxiety. I also developed attachment issues because my gf left me a couple months back. I need help on how to be a good student again, I've been battling depression for a couple months this year and I'm struggling to keep up with my studies, time management, and mood. I'm oversleeping everyday and gaining nothing from my medication except feeling super relaxed and sleepy. I'm nowhere near being productive as I am during my junior years and I'm worried about my grades this school year. Everytime I sleep, I'm dreaming about killing myself in different ways and since then, I've been planning to end it all someday. The pressure of academics and the pain my ex gave me is too much for me to handle. I have no one to talk to and to be with. Even my family doesn't understand me even if they fully support and concerned about my mental health. I don't have the motivation to study anymore and I am very unstable. I need someone who'll understand and deeply appreciate me unlike my ex who just used me to get her grades up and bought everything she likes with my money. I need help or advice, please. Thank you everyone.

This is probably my last post. Why do women always get more attention and help everywhere?