So like the title says I almost want a friend to be attractive so as to be potential partner. Problem is they’re usually straight and then I try to shoot my shot and things get really awkward. Then I end up resenting straight men all together. To the point I can’t even watch a “straighter” show on TV. Like I’m actually so done with straight men because they’re not into me! Like how come most of the population of men aren’t into guys? I think in an ideal world everyone would be bi. I’m an attractive guy, masc and all that albeit I’ve gained a bit of a gut I’m still not fat I just don’t understand. Anyways that’s my rant, what do I do about this? I think a lot of you are going to be sort of annoyed by this post but if you’ve been through this let me know I can’t be the only one. I know I strayed from the question but does anybody else prefer to have attractive bros?

A lot of us have all been there buddy…I don’t think this Wolverine will reciprocate, but I thought the their unrequited relationship/friendship, though subtle, was done well. Hope they bring DeMayo back as a writer next season cause this season was a blast. And give Morph a love interest!

Alternate iterations of the comics, Wolverine has been at least bi.

Many porn actors are out there that are actually straight but gay-for-pay. Would you guys hypothetically go straight-for-pay and be in a heterosexual porn?

So, I’m almost 3 years into a wonderful relationship with my partner. But, recently, TikTok has been suggesting videos to me from someone who I used to have a crush on and who led me on. He’s posting all these sad videos about his hurt heart from his breakup. I don’t know why, how, or when his relationship ended, but he wasn’t single when he was leading me on. So, these sappy videos make me feel some kind of way because it feels like karma got him. He flirted with me and hid his partner from me while he was supposed to be in a happily monogamous relationship, and now he’s brokenhearted and in a new city. 🤷🏻‍♂️ IDK. I’m probably a dick for feeling how I do, but it just makes me all the more appreciative of what I’ve got.

EDIT: I was single when I had a crush on him and was led on by him. That context is really important. I wasn’t doing anything behind my partner’s back.

So I need some guidance on a couple of things. To clarify, I was advised to not date until I worked on my self-esteem and mental health; I'm not very comfortable in my own skin (I'm currently exercising again so I don't hate my body as much) and given I would get easily frustrated from the lack of results on apps, I uninstalled them. Perhaps I took them too seriously and was overly critical.

One day the topic of sleeping with friends/FWB's came along and when I expressed that I don't have those type of connections (at least with one friend but not anymore, and my other gay friends don't see me in that light), I was told to go out and make new friends (preferably , even just meeting people to establish something like a relationship or just start dating.

This was where I got confused because I understand the lines and differentiations between hookups, relationships, dating and friendships, but they recommended I'd experience each category but don't want me to date at all? I get the suggestion to keep it casual but I'm also expected to tightrope it?

My other conundrum is not knowing how to go out to places alone at my big age (30 onto 31 next month) as I've always done something with a group (Pride but that was years ago, now conventions and board game nights, maybe meeting up with a friend to do something). At least at conventions I can branch off and do my own thing but that's like 5,000+ or more of like-minded nerds.

I've also thought of taking a trip alone to Florida to visit a friend, but that's about it. Otherwise, being between DC and Baltimore, there are places to go supposedly but I don't really have the charisma, vulnerability, attractiveness or social skills to leave my comfort zone, engage with others and stand out with people (I really want to see a drag show next month in Baltimore but don't want to roam the city alone at night nowadays). One friend said just go, and I'm like, "Alright but I'll likely put up a wall and embarrass myself in the process."

I know we love NAKED, and the old jock strap but in terms of out in public what is you favorite look on a man?

I love a tank top undershirt on pretty much any man. Especially when they wear it under another unbuttoned shirt or unzippered jacket. OMG under a flannel! Bonus if they’re hairy!

On the face, a thick 80’s cop mustache.

For more than a decade now I’ve wanted so much to be with someone. So many useless tears were shed over this absurd obsession. Now I’ve been a loser loner for so long I can’t imagine myself being with anyone else.

I’ve started sleeping in the middle of my bed for the first time now and can’t imagine how I’m supposed to compromise otherwise.

Big sigh. I hope all you guys that found your man get to hold onto him 🙂

So this past Monday night I hooked up. I'm 23 and I met up with this 28 year old bottom from Grindr and topped him. We met up at his house and I was really nervous on the way there especially cuz I don't usually hookup and I haven't been super social these past few years anyway. I considered turning around while driving there because I had a feeling I'd regret it. I decided to go through with it though. We had to hurry cuz his family was going to be home soon.

Before we started he didn't seem too enthused. I was hugging him from behind once we got to his room while he turned the breakers back on. He turned them off to disconnect the cameras in the house as he let me in. He said, "You can be all over me in just a second" in an almost bored tone. Perhaps I'm overthinking that part. Moving on, I forgot my lube in my car so we used his, oops. We made out a bit, I licked his hole, not enough in my opinion. I fingered him a bit, feel like I could've done more of that too. Eventually he told me to put my dick in him. At first I accidentally went too fast and told me to slow down which I did. Then at one point I switched up the stroke and he told me "that feels good." We kissed while we fucked and I was getting pretty close which I gave him a heads up about. He told me to cum in him and I did, then shortly after, he jerked himself to completion while I was still inside him. He then asked me if I had fun and I said yeah, I returned the question and he said "yeah" as well. In hindsight, I feel like I didn't fuck him good enough. We were in missionary and I just didn't do great I feel like. I feel like my strokes were lazy, slow, not full. I'm not super confident in myself these days so that obviously doesn't help matters. I feel like I could've been more dominant and energetic but maybe that's just not me.

I complimented him a lot throughout the experience, I told him that he was really hot multiple times, oops. He never said that I was hot back but he did return my nice teeth compliment. I wonder if I just looked better in my pictures or something. I've also been suspecting he was disappointed in my dick too cuz he seemed enthusiastic about the dick pics I sent but not too enthusiastic about it in person, I may be imagining a disappointed facial expression when he pulled it out, but I'm not sure.

Shortly after we were done it was time to get me out of the house before his sister got home.

I checked my phone obsessively the first few minutes of my drive back home which is unsafe as fuck, I know. I was checking to see if he'd give me any feedback, when I realized after some time I wasn't going to get it, I started hurting. I decided to text him and ask how he was feeling, he said "Good" and "Thanks for coming!"

I replied, "and thank you for cumming!"

He didn't open that message and an hour later I sent another one saying, "That was really hot, hope you had a good time. I was a bit rusty cuz I haven't topped in a year LOLL." He didn't open the messages till the next morning and only responded with a face pic which hurt a lot. Sending a face pic with no text is something he'd do before we hooked up too during the week we had each other on snapchat before meeting. I sent a face pic back and he hasn't opened the message in what will soon be a full 2 days.

I guess it's a good sign he didn't block or unadd me yet but since he didn't confirm that he had a great time I can only assume it was boring for him. He'll be out of town for a month and all I can think of is all the hookups he'll experience during his travels that will be better than his time with me.

This is all I've been thinking about since it happened. I won't be hooking up any time soon or ever again. I know since he's 28 and he's probably hooked up so many times before his time with someone as inexperienced as myself probably wasn't among his favorites and that just hurts to think about. I know by the very nature of hook ups I'm just another body to him but I at least want to be a positively memorable body.

I'm also amazed at his life. He said he's been working out consistently since he was 16 and you can definitely tell. He also lives in New York half the time and works remotely. He spent 5 years doing the job I currently work and he ended up leaving it cuz he hated it and I just want to be him in a way.

I want to be desired. Ugh, this is so dumb. I hope he enjoyed the dick enough to hit me up when he comes back but I don't think I'll go back just because I want to spare myself the hurt feelings. I have this intuition telling me that he'll probably hit me up again when he's back in town and horny but maybe I'm just deluding myself for the sake of my ego, he could very well end up blocking me or something.

Ugh. O well.

So this is a sort of whiny annoying unlucky me kind of posts I guess, so bear with me haha. I’m aware of how this is very normal, how everyone goes through dull sex and how real life sex isn’t porn.

I haven’t had a vast number of sexual encounters to be fair, but it’s insane how my desire for men has diminished after every hook up. I find myself barely thinking about sex and once I do, I quickly remember how crappy my experiences have been and lose all desire.

It is NOT my intention to crap on anyone here or their performance, or to brag about how I’m too much for the guys I’ve met. I’ve just had terrible luck in that regard.

If you ask me why I feel this way, I’ll say I don’t desire the guys once I meet them in real life, at all. They either lack that steamy horny attitude, don’t smell great, barely look like their pictures, or simply have an off-putting personality. I end up having zero desire to do anything to their cocks. Am I the absolute best guy out there in these aspects? Absolutely not, but why do they feel what I don’t?

I’ve tried relaxing and not get too caught up with expectations, but hell, why can’t it be normal to experience good sex for me? Why do the men I hook up with obsess over me while I don’t feel crap for them? Why can’t I for once be that guy who obsesses over someone who isn’t crazy about me, at least? Hell, I want to know what that is like. I want to know what it is like to desire someone sexually, and to say I had great fucking sex with a smile on my face!

Sorry for venting, I guess I needed it. I must admit I’m also a bit jealous of my straight friends who tell me about the awesome experiences they have most of the time, while I just disappoint them every time with mine. I want to know what they feel.

EDIT: A more appropriate word for the title would be satisfying instead of proper (because wtf is proper?)

EDIT 2: just to add more info, I don’t actively seek “perfect looking people” or even close. I’m not one to find faults in people or try to make up reasons why I don’t feel desire for them. Hang ups in that aspect haven’t been a problem since day 1 of experimenting, it’s actually my friends who have questioned who I hook up with but idgaf about what they like, I’ve just given myself the opportunity to experiment and get to know other people.

I probably came off as a judgemental picky mofo in the description above but trust me when I say that’s not the case and I haven’t made absolutely anyone feel bad about anything, not even the ridiculous catfish guy! I didn’t complain one bit. I’m also completely okay with my sexual orientation and don’t have trouble performing.

So, I'm 19. I did dumb shit that wasn't at all smart, I realize that. I messed around with a guy who was in his 50s, and about a month after it started I stopped it because I realize how weird it felt. Now, he keeps messaging me saying he misses me. I tried being friends and that just hasn't worked out, and now I don't know how to fully tell him that it's done and we need to never interact again. Should I just block him? I don't know what to do...

Im 18 virgin and bisexual (bottom if that matters) but it seems like lots of people go through hoe phases and i was wanting to have one to have some fun and suck some cocks but im worried about you the STDs and all of that, even with a condom i feel like i will get one. I know to get the HPV shot. I dont have anyone to have a fwb situation either. Should i wait till im actually in college? Experiment over the summer? Im not sure what to do. Any advice appreciated!

Edit: im a recovering porn addict too, i havent watched in about 2 months but i do masturbate daily will this affect my performance?

Sorry if this isn’t the right place to post- I’ve just found quite a lot of support and kindness from posting here previously.

Hello. I’m 18m (and autistic).

For the last few years, I’ve tried being as independent as I possibly can. I had a bad upbringing from a broken family and was abused by my stepfamily (who are gone now after my stepdad cheated on my mum when I was 11).

I absolutely hate relying on people, because I was taught from a young age that my anxiety was a burden and it made me unlikeable.

I’m so angry because of how difficult it is to GET help though. I have bad panic attacks, bad anxiety, and depression. I want to be proactive and get better, and I’m willing to put that work in, but the most I’ve been able to get is antidepressants that haven’t helped. I spoke to a doctor today who felt bad for me because he was convinced I needed urgent help but couldn’t really do anything aside from trying to refer me to people (with waiting lists longer than a year).

I feel so angry because I want to be successful. I want to be able to leave the house, get a job. I want to indulge myself in education and get better qualifications. It seems though no matter how hard I try, no matter how hard I push myself again and again, I just cannot do it? I feel like a coward because of this. I’ve been trying to take the bus and leave the house, but I am so scared.

I’m not mentally well enough to get a job, but I’m not actually getting any mental support? It’s such an awful place to be stuck in. Im not waiting for someone to save me, but I’m also aware that I do need professional help. I can’t sit in the car for 10 minutes, or be out of the house for long.

My friends are all going to university and celebrating together right now (I’m not in school), and I hate that I feel jealous. I’m happy for them, but it feels like they are celebrating everything I can’t do. They are going on vacations and spending time with their families, while I am at home trying to find remote work and failing. I feel so ashamed of myself. Life isn’t a race, but I am literally not progressing at all.

What do I do?

This all kind of hit me the other day. I didn’t feel very well, and I just stayed awake crying like a baby. I was told that I shouldn’t cry and that crying is pathetic by my mum. I had to keep my voice down and be quiet because if she heard me crying she’d shout at me. I felt like a scared little kid. I’m 18 years old! I don’t need to rely on family and I want to be able to live on my own.

Am I just being pathetic? My mum says I am and that I need to get a grip. The world is so scary, and I don’t understand how I’m supposed to get better.

So, had one of those weird moments and curious what those in relationships do to zone out the noise and be the best for your partner… let me explain!

In a very happy ltm relationship with someone is perfect in every way. We have great sex life in which he is pretty much the lead instigator ;) Yesterday I was intimate with him nothing unusual & so happy we do it but was thinking a lot about work - deadlines etc. When he finished, we laid with each and after the usual compliments said ‘what were you think about? Seemed to have a lot going on’ 🫣

I was so horrified, not in what he said more I’m letting these things that really don’t matter impact on the one thing that does. We talked it through quickly but I wanna be better than impact that moment.

Totally understand it’s not going to be the best ever every time but I can’t be the only one. How do you guys park the noise and just focus on each other in those intimate moments?

Basicly in every sense of the word I feel lonely. I don't feel represented in media as gay men only seem to appear in soap operas and romance films. Whenever I watch and action movie or any animated movie or show, it feels like there's only straight couples and gay women being represented. When it comes to advertising and fashion, I see billboards of women in underwear everywhere and every mall I go to has several womens lingerie stores but no men's underwear stores. This leads me to never feeling sexy or confident and n myself to the level that all my friends are and it sucks.

It's hard to find gay male friends, all my lgbt friends are from every group other than gay men and the rest are straight. I appreciate them all but they have verry different experiences than I do and at times I feel like they take me less seriously that everyone else. Literally when I was dating a guy, one of them said something along the lines of "how do you have a partner and I don't, isn't it supposed to be harder for gay guys" and a lot of the time I feel like my relationships aren't seen as real compared to straight or lesbian relationships in my social circle. I'm constantly told about how mens bodies aren't attractive and stuff like "anal is disgusting, oh no not in gay relationship, just for straight people" by my friends and Im just like... how am I supposed to take that? I just feel so isolated.

My parents are disappointed, they say that they're sad because they wanted grandkids and now that apparently completely out of the question and they constantly say stuff like "the life style that you chose is hard" and stuff along those lines and I always have to keep my relationships a secret from half the family.

On top of that all off my BF of 3 years just broke up with me because he says that he wants kids and that's not possible with me apparently. I told him we could adopt or surrogate when we're ready but idk I guess that's not the same to him. I asked him if it was just my personality and what I could work on and he said it's not that.

Idk I just feel so alone being a gay guy. At times I just feel like the world is just not made for me to feel happy in

Hi there! I am working on a project for Pride that is about Alan Turing. I live in California, USA and I’m wondering if any UK friends on here would be willing to mail me one of those Alan Turing £50 notes? I could Zelle you it’s worth or find a way to pay for it and the shipping, I just think it would be cool to include one of these with the project.

Lmk if anyone would like to help! 😁😁

Im from Ireland and while homophobia isn’t awful it just feels like I wouldn’t be able to just exist ima. Relationship without half the public seeing it as a joke or judging us and I know I should be more brave but it’s not even that I just want to love somewhere where being gay is at least a bit more normalised is there are any countries where being gay just isn’t made out to be this big thing I was told by people in most big European cities are good options

I notice sometimes on Reddit, the word “partner” can be used redundantly or lightly. Do you make a distinction between the two. If so, was it a certain moment/time you realized that he was more than a boyfriend or did you just wake up one day thinking that he is your life partner now and you are his? How long have you been together by then?

Catfish might not be the right term.

Ok -- hear me out. Here in Minneapolis, Sniffies dominates the hook-up scene (from my perspective). They've managed to launch a light-weight, easy to use tool to find everything hook-up related. They seem to be more focused on the customer than ad revenue (for how long, who knows). This has blown (no pun intended) the competition out of the water -- as Grindr continues to send false notifications on the random (eye roll).

If they were able to revamp the cruising/hook-up digital experience, than why cant they do the same with the piss-poor dating apps gays have to use today? Tinder? Littered with false profiles. Hinge? Possible success is buried in pay-to-use features. I try to imagine what Sniffies could come up with, but something tells me it would be better than what we have to use today. But with that being said, finding a gay to have sex with is far easier than finding a gay to date, regardless of tools. So... its hard to say if there is a space for 'success' in the dating app realm.

Thoughts?

I met up with regular hookup yesterday lol, and he tried to get me off by jerking me off and sucking me off but to this day i never felt actual pleasure from it. Maybe its cuz i tend to masturbate on a regular basis. And he actually came when i sucked him off, and im honestly jealous lmao. I honestly feel more pleasure when doing it myself than when someone else jerks me off.

What did you think of it? I didn't know anything about it going into the first episode other than it was about a stalker. But it is so much more, the stalker isn't even the main character. It's a series about sexuality, abuse/trauma, boundaries, identity and mental illness. I'm not sure if you categorize it as a gay show but I thought it was really well made if difficult to watch at times.

I’m partnered, so in the beginning, “I Drove All Night” by Celine Dion.

Seven years later (and lately), “Afternoon Delight” by Starland Vocal Band.

I’m 26M gay, I’m single. I always feel empty and low, it’s like everyday, my mood is low.

I have always thought that this was because I didn’t find love yet, I mean I believed that if I have a boyfriend I’ll be happy because it will compensate my emptiness and also because I’m craving love so I’ll fulfill this need.

Recently, I started thinking that «  What if I’m not fullfilled even after I find love ? » « What if I’m feeling always depressed because I have something else missing in my life other than love ? »

I’m really confused, I don’t know how to stop feeling empty, emptiness leads to permanent depression and that’s what I’m living today.

How can I love myself more ? I go to the gym, I travel, I spend so much money on myself what can I do more I don’t know please HELPPPP!!!

Title/question is pretty self-explanatory. I know I for sure have and sometimes don’t know how to deal with the reality of that. Kinda hard to go out with them when you know you’re gonna be overlooked because of them

There's a student at my work and he's only been on shift with me like 3 times now so idk if I know him well enough to ask him out and idk wat I shud ask him and don't know if he's even into me. I'm 26 and he's 24 he's defo gay but I'm just so nervous, in case he turns me down and tells the ppl in my work then they take the piss out of me for it.

Visiting a city for a few days only...met this handsome daddy bear on Grindr - 20 years older than me, seemed mature, etc. The conversation was mostly friendly at first, then he invited me to check the local gay bars - we did meet over there, had a great talk, a lot of fun, and ended up making out, teasing each other, exchanging nudes, etc. - everything leading up to a hot fuck later that week and him saying that he'd like to see me again.

We exchanged Instagram profiles, I sent him a cute message on Grindr after our night was over (he tapped this message). The following day, I just asked how his day was going and if he had any plans that night (he told me that he'd be free) - decided to check his availability because I only had 2 nights left in that city. This seemed enough for him to block me both on Grindr and Instagram. Typing here cuz' I feel a bit frustrated - It's not because I like him or anything (I knew the dude for less than 24 hours), just feel like I missed out on amazing sex with a charming guy that had great chemistry with me.

People will say "It's Grindr", I know 🤣🤣🤣 Don't think I did anything wrong...🤷🏻‍♂️

Around 12 people or so in the class, I was the only guy. 😂 Felt good - like being the only gay hockey player. (?)

It's harder than it looks and can and does take a lot of strength.

Tried it or practice it?

Love to you bros ❤️😘

I (24M) came out to my cousin (31M) and his gf on Saturday and it was the best coming out experience I’ve ever had. I’ve been having been having a tough time lately with my mental health so he and I got together at his place to grill out, drink some beers and smoke some weed. I’ve always loved my cousin, but he’s a big time hunter, stereotypical redneck type so I’ve always been nervous about telling him.

I wasn’t necessarily planning on coming out but there was an in in the conversation and I told him I was gay. Other than my parents and my sister he’s the first person in the family to know. Normally people are like “oh well that’s cool” or “that’s ok with me” but he was the first person to be genuinely excited for me. He immediately responded with “dude that’s awesome” and asked me if I was seeing anyone and how everyone else had taken it. I told him I have been seeing someone and that my parents know I’m gay but don’t really want to know about my dating life or anything. He said “well shit, bring the guy you’re dating over here and we’ll have dinner and chill and hangout.”

Earlier in the night we had talked about a bonfire that he was planning at his place where most of the family would be invited and he said to bring him to that if I wanted and if anyone had a problem with it he’d personally tell them to fuck off. He was so supportive and kind about the whole thing. He also said that if I wanted to come out to any other family members (including his parents) he’d be willing to sit with me while I did so.

When I left for the night he hugged me tight and told me that he loved me. It was the sweetest moment I’ve had in a long time. I’m still smiling from it four days later.