Last week's quick fire phone in only yielded 3 calls. My mistake, perhaps pannel beating was too narrow a topic. So today we are going to open it right out and ask 'What is the best thing? What is the best thing of all?'

So far we've had Sky+, a cup of Brazil nuts (that was amusing), livestock (valid) and wet wipes (which was a fascinating call from an elderly lady in Hebdon)

...although I'm not sure Alan would find Trent Reznor pleasurable to his eye

In MMM season 2 after Alan returns from his suspension, he walks in on SS saying “and that was The Living Daylights with, and I’ve always wanted to say this ‘AHA!’.

Alan seems to find this adorable and states that ever since Angela had left him he has found some peace. However if SS had used his catchphrase prior to his enlightenment he would have done the following;

1). Taped over the security cameras 2). Kicked SS car door in 3). Anonymously sent a skip to SS mother’s house.

I sort of understand this first two points but why on earth would he send a skip to Simon’s mum?

Don’t draw a cock

What's best/worst abuse Alan has ever given Lynne?

For me the worst is from This Time.....'You just said I was a summer chicken. At least I'm not a winter hen who's no longer laying' I honestly wanted to punch him like he was a prostitute when he said that to her.

https://preview.redd.it/wi252gkpcnzd1.jpg?width=360&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0ab83dde9f606066208fcd18aa53373b5a16dbb0

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/305317652180

Most of you seem to be desperate to prove how you can lever in a reference to some rubbish from the news, but here's some genuine and previously lost content that real fans will love. The rest of you can eff off and snort a breakfast post.

Upscaled Alan - 2005 Comic Relief with Simon Pegg.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8i6YOb0uHMw