well . like the title says i cant recover no matter what coping mechanism or distraction i try. i used to be able to go months without cutting but at some point i started thinking i cant recover if im not "ill enough" and made a checklist in my head for things i need to do before i even can recover, this only applies to me and obviously, for anyone else who isnt me, they should get help for their issues and deserve recovery. im starting dialect behaviour therapy in less than a month and one of the main things they want me to do is recover from s/h . well anyways, last night i accidentally scratched my radial artery (wont go into detail but it was definitely an artery) and i want to do it again .? like i dont plan on killing myself neither do i want to currently but theres something so compelling about seeing that . i am so scared ill do it again but next time wont be able to get it under control and something irreversible happens . does anyone else feel this way or am i just downright weird

I like my cuts, like, literally i LOVE it. but because of this, I also feel disgusted and cant stop. I cant explain why do i love it,for me they look.. Pretty. Wtf

I don't know why but I've not felt the urge to self harm during January, usually I'll get angry at myself and SH but so far I've not felt the urge this year.

Can't tell my family this but I wanted to get it out somewhere. Just gonna take it a day at a time and acknowledge the small victories

so i just sh'd for the first time using a screwdriver. didn't really do much but it did still leave 2 cuts so there's that 🤷‍♂️

might do it again in the future if i feel like it

I feel like I'm constantly floating, only the pain of cutting reminds that I'm somewhat alive. I carved the word real twice on my thighs so I could remember I exist. I wish I wasn't so numb.

i went for a walk cuz i was feeling absolutely awful, not even human, and just so disgusted with myself and terrified because i just want to cut deeper and deeper and my arm is almost entirely covered in cuts,everytime i said i'd stay clean for at least a day, i couldn't. and i knew i just couldnt do it anymore. i brought my knife with me and i threw it down a drain. i still have some blades but i'll probably throw them away next time i go out. i still haven't told my parents that i sh and ive only told one friend that i relapsed, idk how to tell them but im really gonna try this time, i think

i got stitches yesterday and the doctor saw this cut i had on my leg but i didn’t cover it so unlike the ones i got stitched, it had already began to lightly scab. she didn’t say how deep it was or if it would’ve needed stitches so i was just wondering if anyone would be open to seeing it and letting me know if it would’ve benefited from stitches/how deep it actually was :( thank u so much!

It sounds more impressive than it is, really, I was only cutting for 6 days, but now I’ve made it 6 days without, even tho yesterday was rough!

I’m proud of myself, so I’m getting myself a muffin as a reward!

Much more expensive habit than I thought before I started, like all the wound dressing and disinfectant and tools, how much do you spend?

My Girlfriend moved away to uni halls this year and is starting to feel really lonely and left out as well as a few terrible family situations and it’s starting to get her depressed and was talking to me about trying to self harm and her mental health getting worse just in general.

I used to just be able to spend a lot of time with her and that helped her out a lot but I think she’s needing more support from someone who actually ‘knows what they’re doing’ the only problem is we’re both uni students and affording therapy isn’t really and option for the both of us. Just wanted to check if anyone had some ideas or ways I could support/ find support for her without costing a fortune, any help would be appreciated thanks 🙏.

TLDR: My girlfriend is depressed and we can’t afford therapy, any suggestions?

So simply said I cut very deep ( muscle ) but it isn't because I'm really sad/ depressed. Simply said, I do it so I can feel strong. It might sound dumb at first, because technically I'm making myself weaker because of blood loss etc. I did start SH because I have family issues and there's a lot of physical fighting in my family and it was a way to cope but after doing epidermis cuts for a long time I got so used to the pain that no mental/ physical pain bothered me and I wanted that more. I wanted to feel less negativity in every possible so I can be this confident person who doesn't give a dog's ass who says/does what. From then on I did only dermis cuts and it worked extremely well. I was such a sensitive person at first but I slowly stop being so defensive and mean to people because of small negative comments/acts. Then when I finally fully realized I was becoming stronger I went all in. Now at 17 I do beans and muscle cuts and wear what I want and do what I want without any care about horrible people. I do everything with pride. I'm not a bad person tho and I'm always respectful to others and follow the rules. I go to school every single school day and work on top of that while still going to training. I consider skipping those important things in life to be weak so I don't skip anything even if I'm at my lowest. I love my friends and teachers and I would never hurt them. I just want to feel strong in life. I want to be something just like everyone else. I'm also schizophrenic but I even made friends with my hallucinations because I know being afraid of them is useless. I am aware that sh is extremely unhealthy to do and there are better options. I'm exploring those options and trying to do what is best for me. To this day though only cutting has worked I'm not giving up still because I know I will find something better to do to make me feel strong :D I hope you all realize aswell that there are better ways to feel better about yourself and how damaging the scars will look later on in life so I wish you all good luck in finding what you would like to do that is healthy. I love you all even if we don't know each other because I understand you and why you do it. Only because I view things differently doesn't mean the reason you guys do it isn't valid. I think most reasons to do sh is valid. Even I'm aware that the most strongest thing to do is to get help. You can help yourself but you need to want it. I'm writing this because Im super curious if anyone else has a similar reason! Stay safe guys <3

I don’t know what happened, suddenly I had my old kn!f3 in my hand and it just happened. I feel so horrible about it, I told my bf and he looked so disappointed. He assured me it was okay and we were gonna get through it but he just looked so disappointed. I ruined it..

Is it bad that I can feel my pulse through the cuts on my arm? It may just be throbbing but I don’t know

my leg is bleeding not a lot but every minute blood is going like even if it is ok quantity. i feel a pulse near my leg. is this serious?

My friend would always show her sh scars and it would make me feel horrible. She would just walk around with her sleeves up, exposing her cuts. She’s like one of my only friends and she always talks about suicide and stuff and I rlly can’t lose her. I also did sh before that even and she knew, but I would tell her I quit. Sometimes she would pull my sleeve up to expose my cuts and she’d tell ppl that I sh. She often embarrassed me in front of others. But uh anyways, she would even show her razors and so I knew where they were. I kinda just took them when she went to the toilet. Ik she probably has more but whatever. This all happened last year. I have been using this razor blade since then, and I’m now reading about thingos that say that you shouldn’t use used blades and stuff. But uh my question is like: is it ok if I continue using it? I’ve never had an infected cut b4 so idk. Don’t know why you read this but thx :3

Like. I feel like I'm faking my whole mental issue and overreacting to them because I don't cut deep enough. I feel as if I'm faking everything and cutting myself for attention, as if I'm not doing "real" sh and that I don't need help.

On one side I know this is not true, but my mind keeps telling me that I'm faking everything when I'm not even that troubled. Does anyone else feel like this too?

I attempted last year but obviously failed. I had to go to school with a thick ass line on my neck. Like I tried to well, hang myself, but the rope fell. I was half awake when it fell so I’m fine ig but like, my friend noticed the line and kept staring. I wore a scarf when I could but it’s so awkward idk. Ik it’s not sh but I wasn’t sure where else to post it :/.

Im about 4 months clean and the way I've been doing the is scratching my leg with my nails normally hard enough to leave a red mark and sking is this still self harm or not

Ok, i was just wondering if This happends to anyone else but everytime i watch a show where ends up there's a characters who self harms i feel and instant urge to do it too, i dont really know why, Im not sad or angry in that moment , is just a random urge (i usually dont let it affect me phisically) does someone know why does This happend? And só , how do i stop it?

I wish i could tell anyone, even my long distant friends, have a quick chat abt it, some hugs and cries.I wish i could let it all go and have someone there for me.Its terrible to feel so alone here.I cant focus, i cant study properly, im constantly worried about finding out ans not finding out at the same time.Plz someone who can relate, plz a friend of mine, talk to me about it, because im not asking you directly, just a quick chat and dont change your perseption abt me.

Plz redditors talk abt it, i feel so alone

Why does my pain and issues and problems shit like that feel irrelevant from others I know a girl she helps me but she went through twice the shit I went through and it feels like I'm being dramatic and my pain just didn't cut it she cut twice as bad I do now and I feel like when I cut my cuts aren't enough like they are weak and in general I feel like I didn't cut it and got played a bad hand

how do i know that what i feel is real or not and what if its all just fake

every day feels the same and i feel like i have no concept of time anymore it was 6 months ago yesterday i dont know

does anybody even know how miserable this feels

I just feel so incredibly lonely and idk what to do. I just have so many urges as well to try and get away from this feeling

I failed pretty badly on my first major exam of the semester and it dropped my grade to a C/D. Had a meltdown and ended up relapsing again after i dunno how long (I don't keep track anymore since it was making me worse). I see my partner again in a few days and I know he wont be thrilled and im worried he'll be mad at me even when he reassures me that he isn't.

I'm just so tired of this happening.

Just cut myself after being clean for two years. Probably because my life feels like it's falling apart. I hate when I feel like this and I can't remember why I stopped. It felt so good in the moment. It calms what ever feeling's I am having. I just want to be sent back to heaven where someone must understand the intensity of my emotions.

Hello. In my recent relapse, i've wanted to join some more online communities where people can share their experiences and support eachother. However, every community i've found has either been way too big to get a word in or make any meaningful relationships, only a venting space that doesn't offer any help, or completely dead. Does anyone know of a smaller community that worked for them? I have experience making discord servers and such and would be down to try and make a group if there isn't one, but I also don't think I am in a place to take on that responsibility.

I'm curious if y'all have gone to therapy or have sought it and ok for maybe a lot of none of of you are scared of going like I am I'm still not going this is just a question to see if people with sh go to therapy but yeah who's gone to therapy who hasn't and I guess a random question I wanna see what you'll guys respond with hey an I scared to go to therapy and shut it down instantly Thanks :)

Every time i self harm, i notice that before I do it, i am overwhelmed with anxiety and stress. But when I do it, I am slowly overcome by a deep haze of depression. It makes me wonder why I even do it at all. I guess it feels good while im doing it, but it's not enough to change how miserable I feel afterwards. Holding a towel to my arm, staring at the ceiling wondering why I can't just be normal, whatever that means. I'm so tired. I have had multiple days now of only 3 hours of sleep and it isnt getting better. I don't know what to do.

Guys i cooked a lil too hard and now its infected perchance and mayhaps needs stiches i do not know alas what to do

i had been clean since september.Ive been gong to therapy and taking meds for depression and anxiety and i decided to start a diary after reading a bok about a 14 year old girl wrriting a diary directed to her best friend, who died.It has been ay 2 of the diary and i talked about cutting myself and how ive been clean.Apparently, it made me think about it, you already know what happened then. I want to talk to someone about it but yk how it is, atleast here no one knows who i am.

need tips and helps