I just started a new job and so many people tell me about their plans to drink every night or on days off, whatever. I don't care what they do, but I really have no response. Saying "I don't drink" comes off as high and mighty somehow, and if they pry, I'm gonna come off even more ridiculous sounding to drinkers. I'm okay with this, I just don't want to alienate people. I tend to overshare, and I'm pretty sure no one wants to hear about life changing sobriety and cirrhosis at work when they just want to go get a relaxing after work beer. How do y'all keep the convo short without seeming standoffish?

Edited for typo

I really wanted to quit drinking I'm Male (22) What should I do? I want to quit but I heard that there are risk I've been drinking every night 2 beers, sometimes with friends please advice me what to do I'm from PH I will quit tommorow I need you guys 😭 I really wanted to quit any advice what should I do.

My husband and I just moved from Arizona to Tennessee yesterday. Yesterday was also my 11-month sobriety anniversary. And I literally moved across the country to be free of a toxic situation that I got involved in when I was drinking heavily. This is my new start and new me and New beginning. I'm super excited for the future. Wish me luck!

So after 2,500 days (nearly 7 years of being sober, working a program, taking other ladies through the steps. It all got too much. ) Menopause hit me like a truck last year (still ongoing) no sleep, fatigue, hot hot flushes, no energy at all , so finally at Christmas I hit the “ fuck it” button and picked up a drink.
Started drinking every day (night) and at first it helped with the sleep. But only a month on I’m worse than before. I don’t want to drink every night (I was a binge drinker before, once every few months) I quit the drugs a long time ago , now I feel like I’ve failed and fucked everything, let everyone down. And can’t go back to the rooms. I don’t have the energy still going thru meno , but noticing the changes in my body (puffy face, weight gain ) even more weight gain and I’m not in control. I need stronger and stronger alcohol which honestly is just giving me a headache.
The thought of going back and re doing everything …. And the funny thing is. All of my family think alcoholism is ok. It’s not drugs !!! lol crazy. I’m starting today. No alcohol. Hubby says. Drink every now and then. But once I start I can’t stop. He’s seeing that first hand now.
One. Day. At. A. Time. I’m praying 🙏

i am 18 and i drink nearly three bottles of vodka a week. i do it most nights maybe its not a big deal but i am afraid of slipping into addiction. i am struggling with loneliness of no real friends and parents who have been mentally and physically abusive to me. drinking is the only thing that makes me feel free because i dont trust those around me right now i am 18 but still live with my parents as i am still in school i haven't been drinking for long. around 3 months

if anyone has any advice/experience it would be appreciated

Hello, this my first time here. I am not a drinker. I’ve never drank alcohol ever before & im 42. However i’ve lived with alcoholics my whole life. Right now the current alcoholic is my father that i live with. I have decades of trauma built up over the years, since toddler age, due to alcoholics. My main question is, though, has anyone ever experienced an alcoholic that picks apart everything that you do wrong once they have slept off the booze? As in, they aren’t drunk or buzzed anymore but have a hangover and are generally in a hyper antagonistic mood. I’ve noticed this with some, not all, alcoholics in my life but my father seems to be the worst about it when it comes to waking up after being drunk. I’m sorry for rambling but i’m just really upset right now because this just happened & i just want to know if anyone else has had a similar experience.

Story time, have to get this out here, this is why I especially despise hackers.

I was going through a really really difficult patch one time and I was just starting to come out on the other side and it took probably you know three or four years of fighting it before I was actually had a chance against it and I was being successful but yeah I'll never forget that I posted on Facebook about getting my 6-month chip and someone thought it would be a good idea to change that into gay pornography and post it all over my profile of people in seductive poses and guys in ropes and all this kind of shit. Every single picture post got turned into gay pornography and or pictures of guys tied up and everything.Truly sickening. My sobriety post got buried.

I never got access back to my profile again. Someone else has it now. I'll never forgive this person who thought it was a good idea to take something that I fought so hard for it being turned into a cruel joke. I wish I could find this person and press charges against them. I wish it didn't hurt like it did, but yeah. Thankfully I'm still sober despite them. That's all guys, take it easy.

I’ve been an alcoholic for 5 years now. I’m thankful it hasn’t been longer but I already have elevated liver enzymes and am on heavy meds due to a heart condition I’ve been diagnosed with in the past year (inappropriate sinus tachycardia) My father is a recovered alcoholic and says it’s due to god blessing him (although he contracted liver cirrhosis in 2021 due to his drinking and then quit then) and he constantly shames me for my drinking and has had my siblings do the same. My mother is still an alcoholic and it runs in the family (ESPECIALLY ON MY FATHERS SIDE) I’ve tried to quit at least 8 times now but every time some horrible shit happens (in 2024 alone 3 of my favorite family members died including my grandmother ) and that’s not me using that as an excuse; the longest I’ve been sober is 6 months but every time I use my entire close family shames me calling me a drunk and other shitty things. I just want to be sober again but the actions of my mother ( I still have to live with them; my close family due to my heart stuff) make me want to drink and my father is they worst if all. It makes me angry because he calls me an idiot and a dumbass all the time every time I even think about it even though he and my mother drank (and other horrible things) throughout my childhood I have no where to go and am currently finding a job since I was fired due to absence partially due to my heart condition (WHICH MY FATHER STILL RIDICULES ME FOR) My life sucks really bad right now and the only time I actually feel things is when I drink. I can’t afford rehab and I know I can be sober again but it feels good to be able to cry when I drink because when I don’t I have to force that part down to help the family and my father will call me to emotional I want to call my grandad sooo bad and beg to move in with him (we live in the same town) but him and my father are very close and to be honest I’m on the same level If I could live with my grandad it’d make my life 10000% percent better but my dad always told me how horrible and strict he was when he was a kid but at this point I’d rather take discipline than shame (I’m 28 with a graphic design degree and 6 years of retail experience) I just need to hear from someone outside of my circle that it can get better because I’m teetering on the edge right now and I have no support (All my siblings are under 18 btw) (I’ve tried to quit since 2019)

2nd post in here tonight, sorry.

I'm in rehab for the first time for AUD. I went in thinking that I 100% would be able to leave and still partake in marijuana, but after 10 days here and hearing some other residents' opinions on the topic, I'm not so sure. I do believe that I have an addictive personality in general, but weed has never been an issue as it's always just something on top of my normal drinking.

My partner is extremely supportive of me in recovery, but we have danced around these topics a bit- he smokes weed very heavily and drinks a few beers every night. With the clarity of my short time here so far, I don't think I'll be able to handle him drinking around me, and I'm sure he'll be okay with abstaining (at least for a while). But I don't think he will be willing to quit smoking around me as we're together just about 100% of the time outside of work, and he relies on weed to ease his anxiety and relax.

I'm not sure how I feel about continuing to partake when I leave here... I don't want to replace alcohol with weed, but I also think it will help me to have SOME vice for when I'm really craving, and if I don't have some bud to smoke I'll be a lot more likely to relapse. I'm also just nervous to have these conversations with him as I don't think it has been in question at all in his mind.

Any advice appreciated!!!

I'm in rehab for the first time (yes, we are allowed phones/computers) and really struggling. I have been sober for 11 days, the longest I've gone by far in years. I know it's really early to be so worried about the future, but I feel like the craving is only getting worse, and I can only imagine how I'll feel out in the real world where there's a liquor store on every corner.

I really, really want to quit drinking. I'm committed to recovery, I really am, and I'm putting in the work and doing my best to take advantage of my time here. But honestly, I'm just finding that i don't like being sober. Simple as that. I find life boring and depressing and pointless. I'm finding that it's not that I like being drunk, I just hate being sober. I'm so scared that if I'm able to stay sober, I'll never find the relative peace that I had while drunk every day, and I'll always wallow for that life. And I worry that one day, I'll essentially decide that alcohol is more important to me than my health and the support of my loved ones, which are both already in jeopardy. I just can't imagine doing this forever.

I have spoken with my therapist here about this and a couple of other residents, but all anyone will tell me is to put in the work and give it time. I just can't shake the feeling that everyone who says life is so much better after getting sober is kidding themselves. Or just full of shit. Looking for inspiration as I'm having a really rough time here in general. Thank you.

*Also*** Considering extending my stay here? I know it's early, but I can't imagine leaving here after 30 days total (20 days from now) with the will or skill to stay sober. I don't want this all to be for nothing if I leave and go right back to my old ways, but I don't even know if staying longer will help. Let alone the sacrifice (significant in my personal life, professional life, and financial wellness).

Anybody ever go on a Bender but walk the really fine line? Like you somehow just know your absolute limit. Like when you're not okay

Hi all. I (21F) am worried for my bestfriends (22F) drinking habits since she started working at this bar/cafe place. She has BPD and I know one of the way she copes is with substances. Shes struggled with her weed use in the past but managed to get more of a handle on it in the past year…but since breaking up with her ex, her alcohol use is on the rise. When she was drinking everyday during the first few months, I just left her be and didnt question it. She slowed down eventually (from what I know since were a long distance friendship), but since picking up this new job at a cafe/bar, she seems to be drinking A LOT more again.

She gets either tipsy or drunk every single night at the end of her shift. Ive never asked, but I think she gets these drinks for free. Again, ive been trying not to worry about it but she recently was blowing up my phone about how much she hates herself and how shes such a screw up at this job. I tried to call her to console her but soon learned shes getting drunk at her work while texting me this. She soon let me call and I could tell she was pretty hammered over the phone. I have no clue why they didnt cut her off by the way she sounded.

Shes been struggling with this job, mainly having a hard time keeping up with the fast pace of it all. Stuff that isnt really her fault. But its been stressing her out a lot so im hoping this new habit is just a combination of the stress and easy access to drinks. Either way, im worried. As awful as it sounds, im hoping that she either drops this job or gets fired because im not sure if she has the self control to not drink every single night at this place. I wish someone there would say something about it.

As her friend, how do I handle this? Do I start the conversation? Or do I just be there for her? I hate to say it, but I find it really hard to talk to her when shes like this. Ive never been comfortable around drunk people, even with the person I trust the most.

https://www.happiesthealth.com/articles/cancer/alcohol-responsible-for-more-food-pipe-cancers-than-liver

You know. I made my decision to walk away. 25 years of irresponsible daily drinking. So many ill effects from it. So many consequences met. Wish I could have chipped in those "chances". I have more than "Regrats". This? This shit? WILL TAKE so-called Friends. Your Finances. Your "Love of your Life". Your job. Your Employment gains. Your fucking Sanity.

"We" are NO "different" than the Heroin, Meth addict. Yeah. About time to take the Crown off. Keep telling yourself "Well, I'm better off then them". No. You? Me? We? Are not.

I'm no inspiration. I'm no Saint. I'm not another "happy story" where it all got fixed overnight. It won't. You? And I will have this horrible "thing" on our backs. Always. But? God Damn. We all have each other. Right? Isn't this what Reddit is supposed to help us on our way? Has "me".

Community. Strength. Fuck how much "Eggs" cost now or then, because I'm spending it on Beer.

Thank you for listening.

I was recently released from jail after a 90 day stay due to an assault that took place on a night of heavy drinking. I am now spending the next 5 years on felony probation and was very lucky I didn't spend that time in prison. I really am just trying to move on but to be honest I don't know how to do that right now because I made the last 3 years of my life about drinking. I've lost a job I kept for 5 years and my vehicle and had my wife (not victim) not decided to stick by me I would have lost her too. Trust me when I say I feel like I've hit an all-time low in my life and its hard for me to see a positive. Even after everything that's happened, I still crave alcohol, and I just feel so disgusted with myself. I never was a "shake my head'' kind of guy but I really can't think of a better phrase to describe this feeling.

I’m trying to get clean(ish) off the bottle and I’ve been having trouble keeping my mind off the stuff so I’ve decided to put all my time into studying, but I’m worried in the long run it won’t do me any good. I am ~ a week sober and I’m 3 weeks into AEMT school, but as I’ve stated I’m getting clean. I am studying around 9 hours a day to keep my mind off of alcohol. Is this a healthy alternative or will I burn myself out. Yesterday I studied from 2 pm til 2 am. Idk I guess, thoughts?

Hey everyone I’m looking for advice as I’ve never experienced something like this before My partner (24m) and I (25m) have been together for nearly 6 years For the last maybe 8 months+ he has been drinking red wine every single night, at first I didn’t think much of it and just thought it was just something to relax after a long day at work But it has turned into something more and I don’t know how to help him I have previously found multiple bottles of wine hidden through out the house and garage, and have caught him chugging these multiple times, I have found both of our frank green water bottles with wine stains inside them/little bits left at the bottom multiple times I have confronted him about this a few times now and each time he makes an excuse as to where they came from like “oh that’s from ages ago I forgot it was even there” and tries to brush it under the rug as quick as possible Today I found another bottle of wine, half drunk and wrapped in a paper bag hidden in the folds of one of our cats (many) beds I’m getting increasingly worried and I’m at a loss, I have tried to talk to him so many times but nothing is getting through to him and he just tells me not to worry

I just don’t know what to do, if anyone has any advice I would appreciate it Thank you

I decided to get sober. I've been drinking heavily since I was 21. It got really bad when I was in the Air Force, and it wasn't unusual for me and the boys to drink every day. I've always been a partier, and beer in a glass honestly looks like a super model to me. I always said I'll only drink one day a week, but it would always creep to almost every night. I'm kind of scared. Alcohol was a such a big part of my life, and I almost wonder what I am without it. I just wanted to get my thoughts out here, and I thank you guys for reading this.

Hello team how is everyone?

Today is my 6th day sober. I'm drinking coke and monster because it's a fizzy drink and tastes, well very good although not good for your health, I've being drinking lots of fizzy drink at the moment to replace alcohol. It's been helpful. I take acamprosate, a drug for chronic alcoholism, although in my experience it has not been helpful. It's my 6th day sober from vaping, so today I have on 2 Nic patches. I've also left my partner who drunk a little bit, I didn't leave him because of the alcohol, but because of something he said - (he said he was bored, and then left. I originally started my sobriety journey for him.

Since getting clean, I want to summarise my emotions into a (metaphor?) likeness of opening a can of worms. It's like being punched in the face with all of your problems at once, and then being told to get up again. That's what it feels like for me to be sober every single day. You need hope, and faith, (not necessarily God, but sure if you like) that tomorrow will be a better day, and tomorrow you will get stronger. And maybe that sounds extremely sedative and spiritual, but it's been working out for me. I repeat this mantra to myself, all the time.

I enjoy being sober, and I don't enjoy it all the time. There are definitely moments I have my doubts. But being sober pays off. It makes you so proud at the end of the day, when you realise you've been completely sober. Being sober keeps me from that terrible hangover regret, from the alcoholic guilt, and from the alcoholic pain I felt when I chose to give in to it that day and be the person I don't want to be.

There's a mask that alcohol uncovered is what I used to believe. But that's not true. Drinking just made me stupid. Your true personality sober should be one that you make the right decisions in, and that might sound boring at first, but the cool thing about getting sober is that you've acknowledged you have a problem and you get to meet your cool as fuck sober self, and she might be hella fun.

There is determination, the human spirit, the fight instinct inside of us to keep going rather than give in. For me, thats something that's something that comes and goes in waves, and in your darkest moments, you need that strength.

Please be kind in the comments. Thank you so much for this community

I appreciate all those who work in 988. That being said I don’t think they have the capability to help many of us. It’s a lot of “I’m sorry you’re feeling this way today” blah blah blah. I really do think they want to help but aren’t really equipped to deal with talking someone off then edge of the world / razor. This is me basically walking back from the cliff of death but if you’re scared to jump then there is a reason.

I'm so lonely that sometimes I wonder why I'm not even drinking, I have no reason in life

My mom isn’t an an alcoholic, but my dad is. I (21F) am an alcoholic. My dad is sober (over two years sober), and I’m over 4 months sober. Are either of your parents (or both parents) alcoholics?

Im really proud of myself! The longest I’ve ever made it was a week. I feel good and I look so much better. I had no idea my face was puffy until it wasn’t.

I’m 7 days sober! After an interesting run with a bottle of listerine, vanilla extract, and canned foods cause that’s all I had to eat. I lost my family a week ago. My sisters and family who I’ve been close with for my 33 years on this planet are just…. Gone. Had enough of me. But I can’t blame them.

We go through this deniability that things will get to a low point until they do for us. We fight and try and do our best to be normal— but we can’t because we are powerless.

My only companion today is myself. And I’m over feeling sorry for myself about it. Every single thing that’s happened over this past week is a clear indication that I am indeed powerless and I need to do something drastic to get better.

So I’m 7 days sober and clean now. My detox is done with. Slept 24 hours straight one of these days I’m pretty sure. But it’s nice being able to express myself here and share some of my experience.

So if you ever feel like picking up a drink just know that you can be in my position as well.

No family left, no friends left, not even $20 to get food so you are eating canned vegetables to sustain yourself, and wondering where it ALL went wrong. For me it happened 12 years ago and I had to fall all the way down to realize that there truly is a rock bottom. It’s a terrible place to be. Thanks for reading just wanted to get this all out there.

It does get better. Give it time. 🙏

Approx. 18 years extreme functioning alcoholic, got much worse in the last 5-10 years. Work from home since covid gave me day drinking. Got to point my liver constantly aching, vomiting daily (lots of bile), can't do any activity without vomiting, then kidney started to get a little bit of pain. Decided to detox cause i'm just dying at this point. Can't do tapering, tried, it's too hard, if I take one sip- i'm all in, I can't help it.

1. Cold Detox without any meds (3 days failed)

• Itchy itchy skin
• Shaking hands
• Electric zaps and shots of pins and needles throughout body
• Sweating/Cold uncontrollably
• Severe Insomnia even using Melatonin
• headaches
• Microsleeps would wake me up in a panic/heart palpitation
• Jaw felt stiff and teeth "fake" and clenchy
• Might have had some minor seizures when "sleeping"
• Gave up after about 2-3 days as I couldn't handle it, felt like I might have a stroke or major seizure, and was becoming delirious with sleep deprivation.

2. Cold Detox with meds and vitamins after researching (1-2 weeks to feel completely normal): (There are no detox centres where I live and it is culturally taboo here, so my only option was to do it myself)

• Regime: 2 x a day 5mg Valium, an anti-histamine for the itchy skin, Ambien at night for sleep, multiple neurobine (B1, B6, B12) vitamin, Magnesium vitamin, Leveren liver vitamins, N-Acetyl-Cysteine vitamin, tonnes of Vitamin C, drinking lots of water and green tea.
• Great sleep, reduced all symptoms to almost none, just kind of sleepy feet / pins and needles in feet, but I do sit on my feet a lot cross legged
• Spent lots of time resting in bed, slept whenever my body and mind felt it needed it.
• No pain in liver months later, haven't vomited in months as well.
• The main saviors were Valium to replace the years and years of GABA receptors being messed with by alcohol and it replacing that issue during the detox so i dont have a stroke or seizures, and the Ambien for sleep which was impacting my entire health when I wasn't sleeping during the detox.
• Stayed on all of this even beyond the typical time until I ran out of meds, just to make sure (and I don't have a pill addictive personality so wasn't worried about the Valium - only addicted to alcohol).

Happy to answer questions, but yeah this worked for me. Been 5-10 years since I've felt so active and able to actually physically function properly.

My son entered rehab this morning 6 days sober, supposed to be a month. Plan is to step down to intensive while temporarily living with me and ease back to remote work maybe 4-6 weeks after release. Maybe move back to his big city, but perhaps with sober roommates a few months after that.

He is a very bright guy who started binging hard in college and whose binging is affecting his work and health. 30-50 drinks per week, usually to black out. His rock bottom is much higher than my recovered partner and by many stories here, and I am concerned that he will have a hard time believing that he needs to stay sober.

I have been to AlAnon several times for dealing with my partner who is now doing so well. I plan to go back. My son is earlier in his disease. Any advice on how I can support my son on his release?

I’ve had the most traumatic time these past few years, moving to a new country post separation from my husband, loss of a parent, acute depression, bad time at work, loss of friends, just overall awful. I started drinking like I’ve never drank before. Substance abuse, emotional eating, alcoholism, I did what I could to stay numb. But on the 30th of December I realized I didn’t like myself anymore. And after struggling for 3 years, I decided to not drink, stay on a diet, and not do dumb shit and take it 1 day at a time.

It’s now been a month. I value being sober, keeping my wits about me, I value my sleep(!) staying up beyond 10pm feels like a loss. I also don’t feel like going back to the toxic people who kept me in that zone.

There’s no other reason to say this except this one- sticking to the change you want to see even intermittently will show you the reasons why sobriety is amazing. At least it did for me and I hope it does for everyone. There’s a moment after the really tough period of not going to the bottle, where the fog lifts. I hope everyone who’s trying to get sober experiences that ❤️❤️

Hey all. I know this varies per person, but was wondering when the shakes stopped for you guys?

Background on me:

4 and a half months sober after heavily binge drinking on and off for ~5-6 years. Went to the hospital after a real bad binge and pretty much scared myself straight and haven’t touched it since. Noticed heavy hand tremors the first month or so. At this point I’m pretty much shake free but noticed yesterday (just started easing myself into hanging out with friends and getting back into the world) that I was shaking a lot during dinner. Could it be social anxiety? At work and home I’m absolutely fine. Never notice it.

Also interested in any reccomended workouts or equipment that help with tremors/grip strength. I exercise on a stationary bike daily and lift weights throughout the week.

Thanks in advance!