I barely post but when I do, I receive nothing but love and positivity from you guys since you guys know it best!

Tried to go sober for a bit..and withdrawals kicked my ass like a truck. Especially since I would be on it during work. Half of the time is for the pain of my lower back (herniated disc) and the other half is for the high.

Idk about you guys, but do you guys get a burst of energy while on opioids? Or when you used it? Idk if it’s just me but (sounding like an addict) I can function great and work fine while on it.

But after doing 60-120mg a day for the last week and a half, my guy ran dry until god knows when. He gave me a heads up, I tried to taper down so that I didn’t get too sick but fuck dude..the first 12 to 24 hrs kicked my ass. I was yawning so much, I couldn’t focus, my anxiety out the roof, legs keep moving, and work kinda getting done but not really.

I got really desperate and found an old script of mine for hydros and that helped me get unsick. But obvi my detox/sober clock reset. I just took it. I couldn’t sleep. I just wanted to go to sleep so that time could pass but I just COULDNT. Anyways just to express how I’ve felt. I spoke to my S/O about my withdrawals kicking my ass and she was supportive but she kinda made me feel like shit. Said how it was my fault in the first place and that I deserve to feel those symptoms. Idk if it was just the withdrawals making me angry but it hit a nerve that I didn’t want to get hit. I kept my mouth shut but I want/need support not bashing or anything like that.

Am I crazy for thinking that? I agree to an extent but there’s no need to kick a dead horse even more lol.

TW: suicide, family substance use disorder Trying to make it short but feels like a lot of details. My brother — in his late 40’s — developed an addiction to I believe fentanyl around 2 years ago (that I know of). At the time there was an intervention and rehab. And although my mom was hopeful that was the end of it, I knew this was the beginning of a journey for my family. Since then my mom has continued to support him in many ways and he has taken advantage of that support multiple times. Now it’s hard to know what is true and what is manipulation. He claims he is currently not on drugs but he has said and done things completely out of character to my mom and his family, and I don’t even recognize the person I hear about anymore. He has mentioned suicidal thoughts to multiple people. My mom has pushed him to get help such as therapy and doctors since he has prior health conditions. But it seems like he won’t do anything to help himself. I normally don’t post or ask for help on these things. But I feel desperate as we navigate through this. My mom is old and has to deal with the stress and worry of her son. She has talked about completely cutting herself off from him due to his disrespectful actions. I worry we are maneuvering through this all wrong and that we will regret not supporting him better.

Long story very short. I haven't had any experience dealing with opiates until recently. 10 days ago, one of my teeth got infected and the pain was excruciating. The earliest my dentist could get me in for a root Canal was scheduled for 2 months away, but luckily had a cancelation and I got it done 8 days after initial infection. In the time leading up to that, I had a bottle of percocet 5/325s left over from a surgery that I took 1 or 2 every 6 hours for about 10 days along with close to max daily doses of Ibuprofen. Well yesterday I had my root Canal and my tooth was so infected, I took 60 mgs total yesterday and This morning, I only took 1 5mg pill cause pain was getting more tolerable. My pain is at a point now that I'm going to just stick with Tylenol and Ibuprofen going foward. Well 22 hours after my last dose, I'm now laying in bed, shaking, nauseous, getting up to pee like every 10 minutes, can't sleep, hot and cold, and anxiety through the roof. All the research I've done said a short less than 2 week stretch of this lower dosage shouldn't give problems. People with experience, what is happening to me and how long do you think it will last? Just looking to put my mind at ease and move on from this tooth nightmare.

TL:DR No real opiate experience. Infected tooth. 10 days of Percocet 5-325s taking 2 to 6 a day, following prescription instructions. Now after not taking one for almost 24 hours, I feel pretty ill and full of anxiety. How long do you think it will it last?

I been taking 15-20 mg oxy and 120mg codiene daily for the past 2 years . Trying to quit before it eventually goes up . Do you think I’ll have any withdrawal symptoms if so any idea how long and any tips on how to minimize them

Tomorrow will be day seven of methadone detox and I’m just laying in bed now not able to sleep since I napped earlier in the day. I’m coming off of 2mg down from 90 tapered over the last six months and I can’t tell if the worst of it is over. Just been sneezing / yawning a ton the past six days and this is the first night I’m having very mild rls. I’ve read different accounts of people saying it didn’t hit them until week two, while others say it was over by week two lol.

I’m hoping it’ll be somewhat over by mid November since I’ll be moving. Tomorrow is also the day of the week I go to the clinic, but I don’t think I’m gonna go. I still have my doses from this past week and plan on throwing them out once I’m fully in the clear.

Hi,

I was traveling, did raw opium ( tarry black latex called afeem in local language) for 3 days in the row at night first time in my life with no history of opiate use. 29 M.

Just for fun as my bro had those, it's been 48 hours and only issue I am having is bit diariha and insomnia.

When will it pass ? I did pea amount all 3 days.

Rest everything fine and no it was just experiment and no motivation to repeat it.

Let me start this off by saying that I am not promoting anyone to try this method without consulting a doctor first.

So obviously it’s extremely hard to switch from Fent to Subs due to the fact that if you don’t wait 3-4 days after your last dose you get sent into immediate precip. And who can wait that many days?

I read an article showing the different ways some doctors are dealing with this problem. One route was to give yourself a dose of Narcan, and once you’re in complete precipitated withdrawal, you take the sub. It said it essentially clears your receptors and gives the subs the room to cling to them. So instead of suffering the 3-4 days you wait to take the sub and still risk being in precip for hours and hours, you send yourself into pure WDs immediately, take the sub and just suffer for the 45mins to an hour it takes the sub to kick in.

Has anyone ever tried this? If so what was your experience? Would this even work?

I had been taking 4 5/325mg Percocet, every day for a long time. I ended up recently having to get an emergency procedure done, where they have prescribed me 1mg dilaudid, which I was taking 2mg every 4 hours but now I’m down to just 1mg three times a day. I don’t like the dilaudid, it does nothing for my pain. I figured though, since it’s been over a week since my last Percocet, it might be easier to get off of these things entirely, with the help of a drug I don’t enjoy. Is this a delusional thought? Everyone is scaring me telling me just how much stronger it is, but it doesn’t feel like it. For the first time in a long time, I’ve been waking up not sick, enjoying my day without worrying about when I’m gonna take my next pill. Am I screwed bc the Dilaudid is technically stronger?

Well.. what can I say bumped into a mate, got 14 pressed diazepam msjs, and 90mg of codeine by a friend. Lol "friends" ay. Well had 5 or 6 feel like low dosed bromazolam. But yeah I'm 24 years old and just can't shake the cravings of feeling mellow and nice. I know I'll lose control. Been through clincs being sectioned. Nothing bothers me Been a heavy drugs user for 8 years. Crack heroin Xanax pressed opaites real opaites surred grand mals, I just always think fuck it I've tried everything. Just trying not to beat my self up about today and get on with it smoke tons of weed to, got a baby on way in january a house mortgage with the love of of my life. Rant over apprictate any comments.

So, I’ve kind of been doing that. Some people say to not do any drinking at all. Alcohol has never been my thing. I bought a six pack and it took me a few weeks to finish it.

Does anyone have any experience with this sort of thing?

Basically developed a whole bunch of health problems while using and got worse after stopping opiates completely. The histamine intolerance came after quitting methadone

Tomorrow is Halloween. I’m glad I don’t look like a skeleton or a zombie this year without even trying. And I’m excited to attend my little guy’s pre-K Halloween parade in the morning.

Check in here, good bad or ugly. Post whatever you want, what you’re going through, what you’re grateful for. A good topic we ran in group at work recently was fear of success and/or failure so if you have any thoughts on that post that too!

I think I am finally starting to turn a corner. All of the horrible symptoms are starting to ease up a bit. Man this took much longer than I expected. This is my 4th attempt at quitting so perhaps the kindling effect was in play. Anyway I am grateful to have made it this far. Thanks for the support!

I have stopped opiates (a stupid amount) but I suffer from chronic pain, bulging disk and fibromyalgia. The road has been rocky to come off the opiates, but I wonder, can one ever go back to taking them? Normally?

Hi All,

I am contemplating quitting opiates. I have provided as much detail below and really just want some advice on where to start.

I am based in the UK and currently use Heroin daily, smoking anything from 0.1g a day to a gram a day.

I thankfully am able to stay well on as little as 0.1g of PP/PK(the white powder heroin).

I have been using Heroin for 6 months. I was using Oxy before then for around 5 months, then DHC(30mg) for around a year prior, and finally codeine(cold water extraction) on and off for a nearly a decade.

Addiction only began somewhere around the pandemic. Prior to that I could avoid withdrawals entirely as I was only using codeine.

I am now thinking of taking 2 different routes:

A) Tapering off heroin

• Slowly go from 150mg Daily to 50mg Daily over 4 weeks and then book 9 days off work to go to 0mg Daily and ride out the withdrawals.

Reasons for this: I avoid Addiction going on my medical records. My only concern is will power.

B) Going onto a Subutex script with a programme provided by a doctor. I worry that this will take far longer but the added support, structure and having a professional managing it can help. However I have heard of horror stories of people being cut off suddenly and that the withdrawals from replacement therapy being worse than H, especially on methadone.

I would really love some feedback from those, especially those relatively early in their recovery, such as those in their first 12 months. The reason being that I assume those people will be aware of the current treatments available. But also the memory of what to expect will be most fresh.

Also keen to hear from those later in their journey as I understand Detox is the easy part, recovery after Detox is where the real deep change begins.

Do people find its possible to give up without NA/AA or being in a programme?

Are there any common problems to look out for?

For me withdrawals are relatively mild. I just get diarrhea, running nose, cramps,;Restless legs but worse of all is the fatigue/lack of motivation. I find for me I smoke just to get things done and without one, I am so in my shell.

Has anyone used NAD IV for withdrawal/detox? I know there are places that specialize in this and do 10 day programs but I am considering more of a 3 day local IV clinic. Would love to know if anyone has had success (or wasted time & money😊) on something similar. Will also do Vitamin C protocol as that has seemed to help in the past when I've taken breaks. I am taking Pharma oxy 5x10mg/day for chronic pain issue.

Thanks in advance!

So last week on Thursday I took my last dose of oral morphine. I was on it due to surgery and an on going health problem. The plan was to stay off it until I had my next surgery but the problem I am having surgery for has raised its ugly head and I have been given a small amount of oral morphine to take as and when needed not everyday. I’m just worried about how long is long enough to not reset the withdrawals?? I don’t need it today and I’m hopeful I won’t have a flare up and will not need it until hopefully next week and it’s just for one to two doses a day no more than one day.. do we think this is long enough not to reset it?? There are lots of things in place to prevent me becoming dependant again but if I’m honest my GP is no help with this question so thought I would turn to here for some help on people who may have been in the same situation

Hi ya’ll,

So I haven’t caught up on an update in a while, but I’m 2 and a half months clean from a daily 10 to 20 blues habit.

In December of last year, I was 3 months clean for the first time, and decided to relapse and OD’d for the first time in my life. It felt so retarded because in my 8 years of using, I’ve never made the mistake of falling out. And it just seemed unfair that I was good using everyday and that my clean time was what led to my OD.

Few months after that, I passed out in public while trying to get clean again. I was so sick from throwing up for 2 days straight and not eating or drinking, and I blacked out. Split my face open on the pavement. 12 stitches.

Two months after that, I got clean again (which is this time). I’m only making this post to say that this is the most stable my life has been ever. Not just stable, but I’m honestly the happiest I’ve been before I even started using.

I think the main problem with trying to get clean, is I could never last more than 2 weeks sober because of how cripplingly depressed I was. The brain fog, lethargy, shit sleep, depression, all of it. I couldn’t care about anything and it felt like I was stuck between continuing to be an addict and ruin my life or get clean and ruin my life because I’m so depressed. There was no middle ground for me.

The last 2 and a half months, I’ve been on a Kratom regiment and just overall taking this fucking seriously. It felt like I was going to die before I ever hit 28, so nothing really mattered to me. And Kratom helped a bit in the past, but it was only to get me through days I couldn’t get high. I’m not looking at it that way anymore.

For the first time I’m feeling hopeful about the future and I can actually look people in the fucking eye. I’m also locked in on my work stuff right now and that helps a lot. It’s weird how these 2 and a half months feel like a longer clean stretch, than the 3 month time before my OD. Honestly it has less to do with time and how my mental is. I feel like back then, I was just waiting for the next relapse. Counting the days. But I really don’t want that this time.

I’m only making this post in hopes that it actually helps someone. I spent years on this subreddit reading people’s success stories and feeling like it was so unrelatable, because I couldn’t see it happening for me. Just don’t give up. Even if you don’t see yourself quitting soon, don’t give up on your life. I think for so long, I was getting high dangerously because my life felt so over that it didn’t even matter if I died. But everybody can eventually get better. So just stay safe until then.

Love yall man

Find it extremely difficult to fuly enjoy life years after kicking opiods, basically dealing with the thought that being on those drugs would make everything feel better always? 19 months sober from fent

Please! There's got to be a way! Please please please someone tell me how to do this and I will be eternally grateful. (No Medicare advantage or anything related to Medicare or Medi-cal please.)🙏🙏🤞🤞🥺🥺

Hey all,

I’ve been taking pain relief for chronic illness for approx 10 years. I can’t remember a night where I didn’t have oxycodone, morphine, codeine or tramadol before I went to sleep.

All my pain relief was above board and I didn’t abuse my prescription (so I got that going for me), but I’m on a new treatment (immunosuppressants) that has basically stopped all my pain. It’s been quite a miraculous turnaround after having no hope at all, but anyway - I digress - I don’t need opiates anymore, so I’m trying to kick them. There are none in the house apart from 8mg/500mg cocodamol which is a presumably ineffectual fallback.

Wish me luck for tonight. Hoping that when my head hits the pillow that’s it, and I wake up at 7am for work in the morning. Who knows though, withdrawal is a crapshoot.

Been on pills (mostly) unprescribed for 9 years. My ex husband supplied them. After divorce 3 years ago, I got “pretty” clean. Severely injured my back this year and fell off the wagon… hard. I’ve been spending I bet close to $2000 a month on pills. I cannot afford that, and need to quit. I don’t like being dependent on it. I went through withdrawals a week ago, started back up again within a day or two. Yesterday I bought 5 perc 10s, did them all. Today is a new day. I don’t wanna buy but I know in about 2-3 days I’ll be hearing from someone that their script is ready.

I took a 300mg gabapentin today and a 3 vitamin c. Am I on the right track? I know how it goes… the withdrawals are too much.. can’t take it… buy more with good intent.

To preface, I have made massive progress taping on my own. If I tried doing my daily dose a year ago, I'd be hospital level sick. I've reduced my dose by over 1600%. 16ish 8mg dilaudid, down to 1, which I am slowly tapering from (like the other 15 I sucuessful did). As uncomfortable as it is, we control our cravings, and are glad to be in our safe, comfort place when the serious WD hits. I'd hate so much to go through that anywhere else and I've proven myself. Doc says next step is MAT or subs, or therapy.

Yet I was given an ultimatum, evicted with less than 3 hours notice for absolutely no legal reason (tricked me into "only paying utilities) and emotionally manipulated into either going cold turkey or spend 40k on a rehab. So luckily I found a shotty motel that accepted us without an hour notice (not even a deadbolt on the door).

I can't believe my parents have no faith. I went thru absolute hell to get to where I am, for myself. I don't need to be told to do it. They seem to not belive me or something. Yet they always say how fantastic and healthy I'm looking and glad I'm getting into my hobbies again.

I don't know how to do this. It was hard enough before, now I'm suffering in a motel, unsupervised, with drugs and alcohol. I'm at my wits end and my mental illnesses can't handle this. Self harm has already begun and the frequency of my severe episodes is too common (not diagnosed but I'll slowly slip into the worst mental state anyone could imagine. I don't move a muscle, speak, look around or even care to help myself as I feel like I deserve it).

I can't get clean while I'm also extremely ill, and I am my families therapist whom all have disorders as well. Might as well not even get clean how the hell am I going to deal with that if it's already too hard?

Thank you for reading.

3 weeks clean. That’s it. Started on pills 10 years ago . Lost my girl and son to this shit cause I couldn’t leave it alone tried to OD for a month straight after 6 friends died within the last year and a half. Last one hit me bad. Woke up one day on the floor in my vomit and said to myself what the fuck am I doing. Not everybody wants to quit / doesn’t know how or is stuck because of pain management. Couldn’t get pain meds anymore because of all these restrictions and my age so I get it, turned to fet, but fuck that, playing Russian roulette so I can walk right , I got better shit to do. Best of luck to everyone!

How has case management helped you in your recovery??

When a person labels themselves as an "addict," it can be deeply harmful to their self-image, mental health, and ability to develop out of their addiction. This self-labeling often leads to the internalization of negative stereotypes and the perpetuation of feelings of shame and helplessness, which can sabotage the process of recovery and deepen the roots of addiction.

The term "addict" is loaded with stigma. Contrary to popular belief, using the term "addict" increases stigma associated with addictive disorders - the label does not decrease stigma (WHO, NIDA)

Being an "addict" is associated with a lack of control, moral failing, and societal deviance. By adopting this label, individuals may internalize these negative views - even subconsciously - which can cause a person to believe that they are permanently flawe; that addiction is all-defining or inherent to who they are, and will last forever, rather than being the temporary problem it is often found to be (for example, the average alcohol addiction lasts 15 years)

This can create a cycle of shame and maladaptive coping behaviors, where people see themselves not just as humans who struggle with a very natural human issue - compulsive behavior - but as fundamentally defective in some unchangeable way. Shame can lead to feelings of worthlessness, which can lead to worsening addiction as people use substances to cope with the pain that comes from these beliefs.

Self-identifying as an "addict" often overshadows the many other positive facets of a person’s identity, such as being a parent, family member, professional, or artist. This "addict" label can become central to their self-concept, which can make it hard for them to see their own strengths, talents, and positive qualities.

Recovery is a process of growth and development that is helped along when a person cultivates a sense of self that goes beyond their addiction. When someone identifies first, foremost, and forever as an "addict," it can prevent them from exploring new roles, hobbies, and relationships, which are essential for growth and healing.

Labels like "addict" can create a perception that addiction is a permanent and fixed part of one's identity. In psychology, this is referred to as a "fixed mindset," where individuals believe their traits or behaviors are unchangeable. A "fixed" mindset is associated with lower overall performance and achievement, reduced resilience, avoidance of challenges, and increased anxiety.

A fixed mindset can be a barrier to developing beyond an addiction because it implies that change is unlikely or even impossible. In contrast, cultivating a "growth mindset" encourages people to view addiction as something they can overcome, allowing them to focus on building a positive identity, new habits, and healthier coping strategies, rather than being forced to "accept" a label that carries the weight of a perceived lifelong disability.

Negative labels associated with addiction like "addict" often bring about a sense of hopelessness, which can lead to and/or exacerbate depression, anxiety, and other mental health struggles. Believing that they are "just an addict" can make people feel they’re not worthy of the many positive things in life. Internalization of the negative label can lead to subconscious - or conscious - self-sabotage.

Low self-esteem and negative self-perception can also make bouncing back from an addiction more difficult, as individuals may feel that they are undeserving of a better life or incapable of achieving one.

When someone labels themselves as an "addict," it can reinforce feelings of helplessness. They may start to earnestly believe that they lack control over their behavior, which weakens motivation to engage in recovery efforts and takes away from their overall sense of "agency", which is an important psychological concept related to an individual's ability to make personal decisions that affect change in their lives. It can also lead to "learned helplessness", which is an often-documented consequence of both depression and addiction in which a person believes they are unable to control a situation even when they have the opportunity to do so.

In contrast, a person who conceptualizes themselves as being an “addiction survivor” or something similar is in a position to feel that they are active agents in their journey. This is a more positive self-concept, which encourages resilience, self-compassion, agency, and motivation, which are all essential for lasting recovery.

tl;dr the "addict" label, when internalized, sabotages recovery, decreases motivation, increases stigma, increases shame, overshadows positive identity traits, prevents exploration of new roles, leads to a "fixed" mindset, reduces self-esteem, reduces psychological agency, worsens mental health, and can cause learned helplessness, among other negative things. A postive self-concept is crucial for success in developing beyond an addiction.

I woke up feeling significantly better this morning so I decided to go to work in person. I’m sitting in the Dunkin’ Donuts parking lot now coming to terms with the exhaustion that has taken back over me. This was a mistake.

Have kids they said. It’ll be fun they said. They conveniently left out the part where the child brings home a new superbug every three weeks from school.

Check in here, I hope you all are feeling better than I am today.

I was wondering if anyone of you have experience on when the libido will come back after a year of opioid abuse with the last half year of extensive oxy use. almost 800mg a day for the last 4-5 months. libido is at 0 right now and it really takes its toll on my relationship.

entering a rehab this week and am really looking forward to leave this chapter behind me

ive posted here before about coming off a ton of different meds after a major surgery and the withdrawals i was dealing with, and after the worst of them were over i went back to my doctor and asked for more and now im about out of those and im just sitting here dreading the thought of being without them. not even just because of more withdrawals but theyre the only time i feel normal or happy or alive?? taking them is literally the highlight of my day and thats so depressing to me but fuck it they help.

I've been using opiates (oxycodone) for a little while and I've been using benzos (valium) to try and get clean. My issue Is even with trying to use the benzos for sleep and everything I still have cravings and I end up using the opiates. Im starting to scare myself with the combo and I really need help.

With that out of the way. I just started a new job about 2 or 3 weeks ago and I really enjoy it and dont want to lose my job. I know my health/life is more important than any job but I really want to keep it as it's the only thing that feels solid/consistent in my life at the moment.

Does anyone know if I would lose my job if I were to go in? Is there any laws here to protect my employment? Should I just talk to my boss?

Any advice is appreciated.

Edit: Thank you guys for providing info. Also to those who add anymore info thank you too. I really appreciate all the help.