I feel incredibly lucky. After my fifth bout in the hospital with a BAC of .54 I realized I didn’t want to drink anymore. Got out of debt, had sober sex, got addicted to having a solid nights sleep.

I think it’s really important to find out why you’re drinking heavily. It’s physically and emotionally exhausting to be withdrawing everyday. Find out why you think that’s preferable to addressing whatever is actually ailing you.

Be patient with yourself. It took me fifteen years of fucking off and not taking care of my life to make a change. You won’t fix everything in a week, but in two years my life improved dramatically.

Cheers

Its a beautiful day outside here in Austin, usually I would just drive up to a brewery and grab few pints, but I am just sitting at home watching movies. I know if I go outside, I will end up drinking and once I start, I wont stop.

How do you guys fight the urge?

I went to the doctor last week and the results weren't great. Here are my lab results:

• A1C: 6
• Glucose: 103
• eGFR: 77
• ALT: 47

But I do seem to be on the mend. I stopped drinking about a month ago, a few weeks before the doctor visit, and I have felt significantly better since then. No more extreme fatigue, mid-day crashes that caused me to basically pass out and have to nap in the middle of the day. Also, my face isn't puffy anymore.

Since then, I’ve also cut out sodas, and my glucose seems to be improving as well. On top of that, I’m down from 183 to 174, though most of that was probably just water weight from quitting alcohol.

I know there are others who have it way worse than me, those markers from my blood tests aren't a death sentence. But seeing that I've basically aged my organs by a couple of decades at 36 years old is a tough pill to swallow. Either way, I'm through drinking alcohol – my body can't handle any more binges.

My father is experiencing faaty liver i guess but i wish to cure him so can any of you give me any herbal Anti alcoholic medicine for my father I wish if you are from India it would be much more help ful as I can find helpful product directly

I just can’t be 100% sober. I can “moderate” where I have days that I just have 2 drinks. That’s sometimes. Most other days I’m blacked out. The problem is I am drinking everyday and that is going to inevitably kill me. Tonight I only had one but the guilt is killing me. Sobriety is just not easy for me, it’s easier to have at least one drink for me but then I am soooo mad and upset at myself for doing it. Like why couldn’t you just stay sober???? What was the point of putting one drink into my body instead of just staying fucking sober???? Makes me so angry.

decided to ruin my mood by looking at old pictures and realising, even seeing myself only 2 years ago im devastated !!!!

i wish i could turn back time so badly, do things differently, i couldve been the person i always wanted to be at this moment in time if i didnt ruin it for myself so badly.

i always kinda thought id end up w some form if addiction because of my childhood. being raised by alcoholics, watching my stepdad die of alcohol poisoning, having to live in a literal pub for a while bcs of my mums abusive husband who owned a pub and slept on the stanky floor aged 11 and helped serve beer in the mornings.

and even if i stikl became an alcoholic i just wish i did things differently, its crazy how much stuff ive fucked up in such a tiny frame of time.

even 2 years ago i somewhat had friends, spoke to family, now i have 1 friend and hes an fwb im disgustingly attatched to because, if i lost him i have not a single soul left on this earth. and im ruining that too. im literally ruining my life every day and tell me why it feels so good to keep going. thinking about how different things could be destroys my soul.

I finally went 5 days without getting drunk. I woke up this morning feeling energized and EXCITED for work.

Wahoo!

I know it seems like small potatoes but for the last year, I was drunk every single Thursday. And now that I did it, I know I can continue. The first 5 days were the hardest.

I have lost some weight (a couple pounds), and didn’t wake up puking.

Fucking neurotic madhouse with bipolar ups and downs, fucks up my own neurotic tendencies. Everything's not fucking urgent. The biggest thing I learned from my job is that I hate people and it's not even a people job. Every single person in this world is unbearably annoying and I just wish they all knew just how much I genuinely despise them.

Anyway I can't wait to drink tonight.

I just reached 3 days, and day 2 and today I have been down on the dumps.

I feel like crying and everything makes me feel emotional or as if everyone and anything is against me.

I keep trying to tell myself that it might just be my brain trying to get to normal after this bender.

I can’t explain I guess.

Thank you for reading and letting me vent.

I was sober and I felt great. No night sweats, not waking up dizzy and shaking, I could think clearly, and the days didn’t fly by in this static haze. I thought I was cured, I thought I could go back to drinking like a ‘normal’ person. Then after a few days of having a few drinks a night, I thought , “For old times sake, let’s get feeling good. You won’t go back to being an alcoholic.”

Now I am back to having withdraws. I feel defeated. I just had to drink 16 ounces of a 8% craft beer to calm my withdraws. I messaged my doctor right before getting on Reddit and will do everything I can to beat this.

I have 2 daughters under 2, I don’t want them to ever think I chose a drink over them. I need help and I need others who understand.

I vape. I'm not proud of it and would like to quit eventually, but right now it's my only vice. Tomorrow will be 11 months sober off of all substances. I had gastric-bypass 8 years ago, and truly believe that my alcoholism is a transfer addiction from food, because I wasn't a drinker until after my surgery and now studies are showing a massive spike in alcoholism after bariatric surgery. I think it's something like 21% of all bypass patients develop alcoholism who didn't have it prior to surgery. Anyway, my point is that I can't indulge in food as a vice and I'm too poor to shop in an indulgent way. I'm not into drugs, so I'm sticking with the vape for now. It helps keep me sober and from transferring to something worse, so I'll take it for now!

Even though I am on probation (random drug test, etc.) I've said it before and I'll say it again - I honestly believe being on probation is what I needed to get my shit straight for good. I don't plan on drinking ever again. I am happy. I focus on meditation, clean diet, and a lot of walking. Life is simple, and I am all for it.

Drinking problem that I've known about for 10 years. Finally checked myself into 28 day rehab. Was sober for 8 months after.

Went away for work and had to stay in a hotel by myself for 7 weeks. Relapsed, went right back to my old habits. 12 pack every work night, 24 pack every off day.

Finally got so fed up with spending money, gaining 20lbs in 2 months and being distant from my significant other. I just thought to myself what am I getting out of alcohol besides, shitty sleep, weight gain, 600 bucks a month towards booze, not being able to accomplish the easiest tasks around the house.

Last night I poured it all out. I said I'm done. Woke up this morning with anxiety of course. Went on a 5 mile walk while listening to Becks audio book "Alcohol lied to me" ate some lunch. Back in the gym walking this afternoon. Fuck booze I can't stand looking at myself in the mirror anymore. Day 1 today, Day by day after that.

This group has always been so supportive because we DO understand how Alcohol lies and tricks us all.

Hope everyone is doing well and if this can inspire just one person to say fuck this I'm starting my day 1 then it was worth it.

One of the issues that always pulls me back to the bottle is the boredom. Every day like clockwork around 3pm I start to get bored. My wfh routine is wrapping up, I've done my exercise, now the rest of the day/evening isa head of me and I dread the shit out of it. Starting to drink helps curb that boredom. I need advice because I'm going out of my mind.

i shuoldn't've drank last night, of course. my dumb ass bought a 12 pack of beers and thought, oh well let's empirically observe how this affects my brain, lemme try and just have 3 tonight and see how i feel, how does it feel to want more, how would it feel to stop.... then that turned to 6. then 12.

so i kind of feel like shit. i mean, i'm groggy and sleepwalking thru my day. but i'm up and about; i did my chores and worked out and showered and took the trash out. that's a fucking W if i'm honest; i'll take days like these every now and again a million times over a real bender, drinking so much that i feel so ashamed that i have to drink more.

i refuse to feel guilt or shame. it was a mistake, i was nervous as hell, i have a date tonight and i was so nervous yesterday i couldn't take it. just couldn't take it. but today i'm alive and sober and doing my shit. i'm so grateful this didn't turn into a bender; it'd be a bad one if i stood her up, for sure.

i've been in a pretty good period of sobriety for the last 3 years, mild-moderate slips here and there, social drinks to feel normal, but i haven't had a sick, disgusting, vile 5th of liquor a day relapse in that time. i stick to beer now, which is less bad on the body. i feel proud of that, i dunno, if i were to make a big grandiose deal out of 'resetting my days' now, that would wreck me mentally and leave me in a worse spot versus zooming out and realizing how miraculously smooth things have been lately. it's been a rough 16 hours for sure, but i'm back on my feet.

Around this time last year I was climbing the walls. Be gentle with the part of you that wants a better life. Do not fear your pain, it has something to teach you. (:

Usually I go to bed by 11:30-12 latest, but since last two nights I have not been able to sleep. I don’t feel Sleepy till 3, if I go to bed at 12, I will just wake up at 3.

I am taking melatonin and otc sleep meds, still no help.

I have been living alone since my wife had to leave and take care of some family business. Since she left, I am feeling lonely and have been drinking 7-8 beers each day for the last 3 weeks. Sometimes, I start drinking in the morning and finish at night. I have become super inefficient at work and my performance is struggling. I tried to taper off twice, but everytime I relapsed. Can anyone suggest a strategy to taper off and bring my alcohol consumption to acceptable limits?

Day 1 update: Had half a margarita with colleagues after work. Worked late and had two PBRs before bed.

3 weeks sober now really been craving a drink...instead I've been eating a shit ton of ice cream every night. Better than drinking I guess

Edit: I did it! Another 24 hours. Had a good first day at work AND the gym afterward

Well. Good for early recovery me, anyway 😁 hopefully the gym #'s and $ paychecks reach their previous values, soon

24 hours sober at the moment. Beer drinker ~30 units/week, porn and camsites 10-30 hours a week.

Hopefully, with a consistent schedule I can establish some good habits, start making progress in therapy, and both understand why I seem so unable to accomplish my goals and actually heal/grow become the man I want to be. I'm tired of feeling inspired and hopeful only when I drink and watch others on the internet being someone I want to be.

That's all for now.

When I was young i swore to myself I wouldn’t drink. I saw how much damaged alcohol did to my family (my parents got divorced due to my father’s drinking habits, I was around 8 then but they got back together when i was 14, as my father had gone sober, and still is to this day). However as soon as I turned 21, everything changed. At first it started as casual drinking. I would keep telling myself, “I’m young, drinking is what i should be doing now!” which became the weekend routine! (i was also in a band, so we thought it was so “rock n roll”) , however after a while I found myself making excuses to drink during the week. “Oh I just got paid, who cares if it’s monday, I should celebrate “,”oh it’s Friday, I should have a drink”

As soon as i turned 21, well you know, i was able to purchase alcohol wherever and whenever i wanted (I live in the US). And unfortunately for me, I live right behind two liquor stores. If one was closed, “Fuck it, the other one is open”. I was a functioning alcoholic for about a year or so. I was so, confident, I was so much fun to be around with, and i kept thinking to myself, “I have a steady job, i’m not agressive when i drink, i’m actually more productive, it’s not an issue”.

That was the case til i started throwing up bile every morning. Throughout a year, i had gone from drinking a tall can once a week to drinking almost a bottle of vodka throughout a day(smirnoff, the blue label hehe), skipping meals just to get the most out of every sip. Eventually, I went to a doctor, due to stomach issues (diarrhea everyday, throwing up bile, etc, which were no doubt due to my drinking habits).

My liver enzymes were over a 1000 (ALT),and i won’t lie to you, that week i spent in the hospital were some of the most relaxing days of my life so far. I spent a total of a week in the hospital, and throughout it i was kept company by my family, a girl i was dating (we had been dating for about 6 months by then), and close friends.

Once i left the hospital, I knew i HAD to make a change. I went sober for 3 months, and those three months were the best days i had, had in years! I was healthy and fit, my IBS issues had been resolved, I went to the gym 6 days a week, my work productivity had increased… until I relapsed a month later.

I had went in for a blood panel check in which my doctor said my liver enzymes had “almost gone to normal”. However by this time the girl i was dating had broken up with me, my mother had fallen into depression, my father’s diabetes had caught up to him, and i was working 7 days a week.

So what’d i do? resorted back to alcohol to clam down the loneliness and anxiety i was feeling. I started binge drinking every weekend. and i’ve done so since July up until now. My health anxiety got the best of me, and im waiting results from a blood panel i’ve gone in for on the 18th of september.

I wanted so much to follow through, “Sober October” so bad, but today being my day off after 15 days of work, i felt i deserved a day of drinking. I’m hoping to stop tonight and end a bender before it starts.

Thank You all for Listening/Reading this far!! (i have gone to AA meetings, but honestly, it gets depressing after a while)

TLDR;

Still have upper abdominal pain and pressure 1 month into sobriety, labs and CT scan showed normal results. Pain is mainly under my bottom left rib or around that region. Just looking for others’ experiences.

I went on a year and a half long bender, drinking heavily morning til night every day, after spending the couple of years before that drinking nightly only. Started having the yellowish stools and diarrhea several times a day, this went on for several months, I didn’t know what it meant besides my body not being happy. I’m no stranger to stomach issues but really just issues that would last a day or 2.

A little over a month ago I got sober, went to the ER (got detox meds) after 3 days of abnormal bloating, upper left abdominal pain/pressure which was kinda spreading around front and back, loss of appetite. Thought it was my pancreas. The pain got worse in the waiting room, felt like I was gonna explode.

Got a CT scan w/ contrast of my abdomen and everything was marked as “Normal”. I do have Polycystic Kidney Disease (found out after the scan) which I’ve never really shown symptoms of. Kidney function has always been fine.

Lipase was 28. (Normal) AST was 88. (High-ish)

While its not as bad as the first week, I still have pain (6/10 at its highest, but usually a 3/10) coming and going every day, mainly in a small area under/behind my bottom left rib. I feel pressure in my upper abdomen like something is kinda stuck there. No acid reflux since quitting alcohol but I had it bad during the bender.

Gastritis? Hidden chronic pancreatitis? I guess I’ll have to get further testing if this persists…

I’m over a month into sobriety and feel so worn down by this, but I also have panic attacks so gotta factor that in. Benzodiazepines sort of help the pain but I can’t go down that fucking road.

Please share your experiences!

I drank my usual [a lot, too much..] today while also taking a new anxiety med.

I feel terrible, just had to push back another happy hour drink lest I fall. Trying not to sway.

Anyway my normie-ex once told me he *ust doesn't like the inebriated feel - that it's uncomfortable /

just wondering if this is what they feel like, vs. th enormal euphoria I experience after a few.... If so, I understand why they don't like getting drunk. This feeling is v. unpleasant, kind of scary too

Nice built-in mechanism, for them, ! This feeling is v.unpleasant!

Relapsed after months and months of sobriety. I started a new job and the stress, pressure, and losing previous jobs (constant fear with this one) were all major triggers. Its been about 3 weeks and my drinking ballooned up quickly to a max of 12/13 drinks a day, consumed over 12 hours (would wake up, have 4 drinks before work to calm the fear and anxiety down, then a shot every hour and a half to two hours to maintain. I

I'm drinking 7am-7pm then hydrating, always eating, taking vitamins (multi, b1, magnesium) and when I wake up I have slight nausea, crippling anxiety but no shakes like ive experienced in the past. The last 4 days ive been tapering down from 13 drinks to 9 yesterday (continuing to front load in the morning, spacing out around 2 hours now, and done by 7pm trying to go to bed as sober as possible.

My plan is to go down to 8 today and 7 on Thursday. Im going to be around extended family on vacation on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday and I was hoping to not have to sneak booze to taper further. Do you think I would be safe to jump off on Friday (i can probably have 2 or 3 in the AM if absolutely necesary.

I can deal with the night sweats and the crippling anxiety (always better without work stressors and being with family) but I want to avoid tremors and any chance of a seizure. Previous attempt at quitting I tapered down to 5/day and had no side effects besides anxiety and night sweats but the shame of tremors scares me.

Not in AA, but probably going back to SmartRecovery bc that was a great great experience. ANYWAYS, do yall give yourself little gifts or celebrate milestones when you reach 30,60,90, 1 year, etc.? And if so, what do you do, what do you buy, what is your thing!

I mean having a 30 day chip sounds great for those in AA but I was thinking something different for myself

someone once sent me a link that i loved for online AA meetings and my phone went haywire and deleted all my tabs…. i need one now. it was. 24/7 one and one group was called “misfits”. help me find it

So I finally went full sober two weeks ago after cutting back to mostly just weekends ~3 months ago (was at least 10 drinks/night for 2.5 years before that). Never got shakes or headaches or anything like that but I've recently noticed that even the slightest physical activity has me sweating like a whore in church. Everything I can find is people talking about night sweats and cold sweats but I haven't experienced any of that. It just feels like my thermostat is kicking in way too early and it takes more time than I'd like to stop sweating.

I'm just wondering if this is typical or related to the quitting drinking or should I be looking elsewhere for this sweat issue? And if anyone else has experienced this, any tips on staying dry?

My Monday was miserable because I was at a work thing, so I spent two days pranging about a talk I had to do that was basically fine. Everyone was drinking and I got sucked in. Wanted to be one of the cool kids. Plus I knew that not partaking was a recipe for sleep deprivation, but fuck me, I should have stopped earlier.

On the plus side, I'm so WDing that despite getting totalled, I woke up tense AF at 6am, so didn't miss anything ot get fired for not showing up. I swear I smelled like booze until lunchtime.

How is your week going??? Semi disaster like me or you're absolutely killing it at being sober??

If it's going great, share, inspire us! If you're in the shit, share, I'll commiserate!

Much love you crazy fucks ❤ x