So… I’m 23F and I’m on the pill and I haven’t missed a day since early December. I usually only let him come inside me when I’m menstruating just for extra precaution. It is my understanding - please correct me if I’m wrong - that ovulation occurs right before the cycle starts. After we had sex this afternoon, I took my last Saturday pill before the blank pills begin. My cycle almost always starts when I’m in the middle of the blank pills, so I probably won’t get tomorrow, I’d say Wednesday would be the earliest. But I can’t find my free Plan B packet and I literally asked my mom to bring it to me, but I know she’ll be upset about it. Thoughts? Ideas? Advice?

Hi guys. I want to start buying sex toys - I’ve come to a point where I just want something that actually does the job, lol. I live with my family still and the rooms are pretty quiet. Where would I hide a sex toy like a vibrator? Do you guys have any hiding places or hints to keep it discreet? I’m pretty embarrassed about this, masturbation is absolutely taboo in my household and I’d be mortified if anybody found out. Thanks guys.

My husband and I have committed to being as adventurous with our sex life as we can. We're both entering our mid 30s and want to enjoy ourselves before we get too old and lose our drive and desire to try new things.

Recently we've gotten connected with a couple that's interested in swinging as well. We've met them a couple times now. Had our kids play together so we could have an excuse to meet each other. Good looking couple, a little bit younger than us. The vibe is that they're down for it if we are.

We are both open to it but we're wondering if this is just a fantasy no one ends up liking. I think it would be super fun but maybe I'm more jealous than I think I am and I'll actually hate my man being with another woman? Should we just go for it and see how we like it?

Hi folks,

In a bit of a situation and would love some advice! Been with my truly amazing boyfriend for two years now - he is the best man I’ve ever dated by far and for the most part, our sex life has been very fulfilling. However, in the last few months, our sex life has dwindled, and we’ve gone almost a month without having sex at this point. I’ve felt like I’m the one who’s initiated it the last few times we have had sex, but my subtle attempts at initiating lately have been unsuccessful. We are super affectionate otherwise - very touchy/feely, we cuddle every night, etc.

So I sat him down this morning to have a conversation about it - he said he truly hasn’t been interested in sex lately and his libido has been nonexistent (no thinking about sex, no waking up with boners, nothing). He thinks it’s due to work, which he’s incredibly stressed out about and unhappy at, and he often works 11 hour days. He’s on the job hunt at this point due to how unhappy he is. We’ve also joined the local gym and have been going 3-4 times a week for the past few weeks, which we’re both loving and it definitely improves his mood and mental clarity on the days he works out.

So other than working out and hopefully getting a new job (not trying to count on this though because the job market is trash), is there anything you would recommend to improve his libido on either his end or my end? I asked what I could do to support him but he doesn’t know - we haven’t been in this situation before! Any and all advice is appreciated!

Thank you so much!

I really don't know why I like them even tho they are just using me for fun liek I really wanna stop but I can't

Maybe I'm doing it wrong? Should I be using the corners of the pillow?

I (27F) and my boyfriend (30M) have a pretty active sex life, but there's one thing that's been bothering me, and it's the fact that when I give him a blowjob, only the right side of my bottom lip goes numb. I also drool to a ridiculous degree and it seems almost unnatural.

This is my first boyfriend and first sexual experience with anyone, he's quite big in my opinion so I struggle to fit him in my mouth. I don't know where or who to ask this

Mi

https://www.tiktok.com/@drjenniferlincoln/video/7466208102304746798?lang=en

My gf is thick asf and i ain’t packing. Can’t make her cum without hands or mouth. Please give me advice on things to try. Dying to make her cum with my dick. I’ve only tried missionary and I wanna try her on top I’m just scared I’ll get embarrassed if it ain’t work as good. Edit I’ve made her cum before with my hands and oral

I’m reading some of y’all’s posts and comments about how physically attracted you are to your partner and how amazing your sex is and how you look forward to it and… I’m just so sad and envious.

I’m 27f been with my bf for about 6ish years. When we first met we had incredible sex. One time I came so hard I was shaking for 45 minutes after.

And then idk. It just went away. I thought it might have been my ssri so I stopped taking them one year to see if I would become a horndog again or something, but nope. I just got clinically depressed and hospitalized and back on them.

Idk what it is. I find myself really itching for several years to just be able to have a one night stand every couple weeks or something- I don’t want a different emotional or physical connection with anyone else, but just a sexual one. My bf and I are VERY physical, in terms of cuddling and needing to be together and touching. But I just never want to have sex with him. And I mean.. we have literally gone a full year without fucking in the past. And now it’s more like 3-4 times a year it feels like, and a couple or 75% of those times are I’m just feeling bad we haven’t fucked so I play along.

Is there any other answer to this beyond “you need to break up and find a sexually compatible person?”

It’s a little more complicated because we’ve been long distance for a few years too now and so when we do meet in person once a month or couple months, I still dont want to have sex. Sigh. But I want to be with him so badly.

Thoughts? Recommendations?

Became sexually active for a few months now. For guys it is obvious when they orgasm as they cum.

For me I have this tingling and hot sensation from my feet then it rises to my legs. The pelvis would feel an urge pleasant sensation and kind of like needing to pee then after maybe 10-20 seconds the feeling goes away. I’m not sure if this is an orgasm as I always thought it would be very intense?

Hello all, first off, I apologize for any mistakes made. I’ve read Reddit posts but have no idea how to write one or the rules of doing so. To begin with, I have had “sex” before, but I was either VERY young, or I was under the influence, and was over 15 years ago. Don’t remember much of any situation. I’ve never had sex in adulthood, but I have been in multiple relationships (although I’ve taken a few years break to focus on myself) I’ve always ended things before I let it get there. However this isn’t (in my opinion) a trauma response, but it’s more so because 1: I’m incredibly self conscious of my body (I lost a lot of weight about 4 years ago and have yet to deal with the loose skin, before that I was very large) and 2: with being neurodivergent I struggle with social cues, how to initiate, when to initiate, and I have anxiety. I don’t know what a realistic intimate interaction looks like, how to start it off, or how to tell if he wants to initiate those first steps. We’re talking like right at the beginning before kissing. How do you then move from kissing to more intimate things? Then from that into the bedroom? When do I undress? Is it weird to just undress right there or do I excuse myself? What if I want to wear something sexy to cover the loose skin, when do I put that on? I want to move on in life. I want a serious relationship. I’m tired of letting my anxiety get in the way of my life. I want a family, and this is such a huge hindrance (obviously). Please help!

I’ve been hanging out with a guy for about a month and I like him, but there’s one hill I’m ready to die on. The first two times we hooked up, he asked for BJs but didn’t reciprocate. I want to have the conversation about needing oral to feel satisfied and desired, but I want to do it outside of the bedroom, not in the moment.

We’re supposed to meet at the hot tub at our gym tonight, then go to his place. If we’re alone at the gym, I was hoping to bring up the convo there because I intend on breaking it off and not even going to his place if he says he’s not willing to reciprocate oral.

How should I bring this up? Jokingly - “hey, what’s the deal, you only like to receive but not give?” Or in a more serious manner? I’m not good with my words and sometimes offend people, so I’m looking for suggestions! TIA

My current partner told me about their fantasy of attempting to get me off in a public setting. I never had an interest in that kind of thing but honestly the way she talked about it made me want to try it. The idea we came up with was using something like the Lovense Lush 3, which seems to have pretty good reviews, and then she'd control it from the app on her phone. .

I guess I have a couple of questions though. Does anyone have any experience with this, any issues or even a better suggestion for a toy?

Also, are there any ethical issues to concern myself with? The idea is we'd go to a bar, so there'd be no issue of children around. I also really don't think it would be possible for me to cum since I normally need clit stimulation and it seems that doesn't really happen with this toy. So I guess it's more of a buildup thing until we get back to the bedroom. But am I violating the other people at the bar who didn't give their consent to be involved in this? Or am I totally overthinking it?

My bf likes deep throating and sometimes it makes me gag. The last time I actually threw up a little...on his penis. 🤢 It was like a thick spitty-throw-up, not a full blown vomit. But still gross. He got turned on by it though. Then we had penetrative sex. He liked me using the spit and gagging fluids on him as lube. A few days later and I now have a yeast infection. Could my own fluids have caused this from the bacteria in my mouth that was on him?

I'm very embarrassed and realize I need/should have said "no, I need to clean us off before we do anything else."

I used to have a very high sex drive and could easily make myself cum on an almost daily basis without even any visual/audio/mental simulation. It just happened so easily.

Now, a few months out of a messy relationship, I have lost the ability to cum. For context, I developed many insecurities in that relationship and those insecurities became self-hating fetishes. It took me a while to stop giving in to the urge to get off on these harmful thoughts (ex. getting off to women I deem better than me or thoughts of men cheating on me). Unfortunately, despite having stopped indulging in what I consider to be sexual self-harm, I haven't been able to rediscover my old, normal self.

There have been many times recently when it should have happened but it's impossible to finish. I feel like a disappointment to myself and to others. If I'm with someone, they will eventually give up trying. My sexuality was such a huge part of me and now I feel disconnected from my body. I don't know myself anymore. I've lost touch with what makes me feel good. I don't even want others to focus on my pleasure because I don't want to waste their time.

Has anyone else been through something similar and recovered? If so, how? I feel so broken and abnormal.

Edit: I don't want to watch porn. I have a lot of issues surrounding it that I'm working on but for now it's incredibly painful and brings me make to a bad place mentally.

I'm a virgin and the only i get off is from masturbating with my rose toys.

The problem is that once I get to the point where I feel an orgasm approaching, I feel too scare and anxious and immediately stop.

I don't understand why I'm like this.

It feels nice but something scares me about orgasming.

Is this normal?

Or is something wrong with me?

How do I stop feeling afraid?

Hey, looking to see if anyone else has been able to overcome this.

I know it’s very uncommon for women to be able to orgasm from penetration alone. That’s not what I’m talking about.

I’m talking about penetration PLUS clitoral stimulation. It’s like the penetration is too distracting to focus on my orgasm.

It really frustrates me because I want to be able to experience that with my partner. I’m not sure if this is common, and I can’t get any advice or information because whenever I try to like, Google this issue, it just comes back with “it’s common to not be able to orgasm with penetration alone” and I’m like I KNOW THAT lol.

It goes further than that too though. Sometimes any extra stimulation at all (touching, kissing, etc) on my body makes me unable to orgasm, even if all I’m getting is clitoral stimulation. I hate it because it makes intimacy feel so cold and clinical. Like I just have to lay there perfectly still and focus really hard on only my clit, no other touching is allowed!

Does anyone have any tips for this? Is this something any of you have experienced?

Thanks!

Just airing some frustration. Last night with my husband was so frustrating and hurtful. My husband has usually been great at giving oral and it was a standard for us, now it seems like frequency has really declined. It makes me feel gross and like it’s a chore for him. To be fair, at certain parts of my cycle it does “take forever” so I understand it can be tiring. So I bought a toy that gets the job done when my body isn’t being very responsive. Maybe because I added that, he thinks he doesn’t have to do oral, though last time we went at it and I had to finish myself off with my toy, I told him I much prefer oral and said we could do it next time(apparently I can’t expect him to remember that though). We also learned to do intercourse without much pain on my part, so he has been adding that to our activities. He cannot finish from it though, so I always have to finish him off with oral(which can be quite intensive and tiring for me). Well yesterday he does minimal foreplay, honestly he’s quite awkward at initiating but I appreciate his efforts. He uses hands to get me ready enough for intercourse and while it works, it definitely isn’t pleasant enough to help me finish at all. I wouldn’t mind him learning to be better with his hands if he wants to give oral less but he doesn’t take initiative to improve in that arena though I’m happy to guide him. Well i got my hopes up thinking oral would come after intercourse since he can’t cum from it, so no worries about him being grossed out by his own fluids. Well apparently all it takes is his penis being there earlier and he’s turned off by the idea. I just shut down and teared up a bit after that- because he asked me what I wanted and I mentioned it and then he seemed to just ignore me. He wouldn’t even use his words to tell me he just doesn’t like that until I expressed my feelings. He could have told me upfront and offered to get the vibrator out or something but instead I’m just left hanging. I bet he was even expecting me to just happily go down on him so he could finish while he leaves me unsatisfied. Anyways, I did communicate this to him last night after he got annoyed at me for feeling emotional about it. He said sorry but that doesn’t exactly make me feel any better.

Another thing it’s happened before that he gets this idea in his head that I’m just giving and expect nothing in return because I’ll initiate and let him go first. When that happened, I was super frustrated and asked for some help so I could finish, not even expecting oral, just a little touch and kissing and he told me I couldn’t expect that because his drive completely went away after he finished. Thing is, my drive also goes down when I finish and I still make a point to help him out even when I’d rather just lay there once I finish.

Anyways, I’m hoping we can just work through this. Just frustrating and feels like such a sensitive area that communication is hard without hurt feelings. Thougu I probably need to be better

I just realized that I don't even really masturbate or enjoy being stimulated because it feels good. With no external stimuli i don't find it that enjoyable, it's almost like another part of my body being touched. I only enjoy it due to thinking of or watching something that turns me on. Then it's good. But basically it's just a means to enjoy the mental image and not the actual feeling.

Is this weird? I feel like this is bad and that most women actually like the feeling itself :( And I can only finish when thinking of a man being pleasured so I feel like that's no good either. For context I also never finished from oral or any other sexual act.

I’ve always struggled with pelvic floor tightness and for years, it was impossible for me to even experience PIV sex because it literally wouldn’t fit it was so tight. I didn’t know why for a long time and then my new obgyn noticed during my first visit with her and referred me to pelvic floor therapy. I went to PFT for three months. We mostly focused on loosening it by dilating and doing a couple floor exercises but eventually added kegels to keep it strong. Then sex didn’t hurt at all, it was miraculous. Then, my partner at that time, we’ll call him Partner A, broke up with me. I didn’t focus as much on keeping up with kegels and dilating since I wasn’t sexually active. Then, when I started seeing my current partner, Partner B, sex hurt like hell. I immediately started up the floor exercises again and I frankly don’t dilate as often as I should, mostly because it’s very time consuming and I’m a working college student. But my sex life with my partner is still important to me. It seems like PIV is always painful with Partner B - sometimes it feels like I’m being stabbed and other times it’s not as bad, but it’s still like going to the dentist and having unwanted sensations. Also, Partner B’s penis curves downward and not upward which, maybe I’m wrong, I haven’t seen much dick, but is kind of abnormal. I want to enjoy sex with him. I did with Partner A and I feel very disappointed that I haven’t been enjoying sex with Partner B. Thoughts? Tips? Is there anything helpful I could add to my pelvic floor routine other than the dilating?

When I use toys I cum all the time, but when it comes to my own fingers it takes a real while to get into the mood and lead myself to the point. The other day I was reading an incredibly erotic fanfic that made me touch myself, but even though I was super turned on, I just couldn't finish no matter what (tried to touch my boobs, anus, tights etc too with no avail). I'm not on antidepressants, but I have low moods sometimes. When I was younger (36F now), I could cum from my fingers quickly and hard, but these days I relay on my womanizer maybe just too much. I have troubles cumming from a man's touch too. Can someone relate? Any advice how to make this better?

hello everyone!!

soooo very recently i (28f) finally had my first orgy. it had its ups and downs but was overall a very enjoyable experience and i’m already preparing for the next one!

my question is: how can i improve my stamina? and i don’t just mean athletic stamina. after a couple of hours, my vagina hurts! even though i am turned on want to keep going, i feel this sensation that is a mix of numbness and soreness? i just want to be able to have hard sex all night long while still being able to feel pleasure… giving head is one of my favorite acts but obviously after a certain time and a certain amount of people my jaw hurts too!

how can i look past the physical discomfort and focus on my pleasure in the moment and go all night long? should i practice mindfulness and learn how to be in the moment more? would i feel less sore if i were more sexually turned on?? should i workout to get used to the feeling of physical discomfort and learn how to push through? any advice? (i’ll still workout and do a bunch of squats though lol)

I’m 23F and went years without shaving my pubes and swore I never would, but then I when I became sexually active for the first time last year, I could tell my partner didn’t like eating me out while I nursing a woolly mammoth down there. So, just with a normal old razor and shaving cream, I started shaving. But I noticed something I hadn’t realized was there - long hairs inside my labial lips. Frankly, I’ve already tried shaving there before. It’s very tricky with normal razors to not hit the clit or the clitoral hood. My mom (she’s cool, we talk about these things lol) thinks I should never shave interior hairs, but I’m not so sure. Is there a special way to remove those hairs without razors? Do most women use razors for pubic shaving, I literally never ask lol?

I've had pretty much zero body confidence for as long as I can remember, going from one end of the eating disorder to the other and now I've lost a lot of weight after covid. I'm 28 now, and have only ever had one sexual experience at 26 with a guy which was very rushed and weird, and then kissed a girl when I was 27.

My worry is though, I'm now worried at how little I know given my age etc. I wouldn't really know were to start sexually, It feels like I've 'missed the boat'. Where do I go from here? I guess that's really really broad, but idk. I'm just frustrated

I've only had sex once before. It was not a great experience - I was just eager to lose my virginity because I felt too old to be a virgin (I was 26) and it didn't really matter to me who with.

But I've found a guy I really, really like and I'm ready to sleep with (we've been seeing each other for a little over a month now). Like I actually want him so bad. But I don't want to reveal my lack of experience to him, and I want to have a good time and still make sure I'm being safe, but also being fun. I don't have a specific theme for this post, but I'm hoping I can get advice on a few things:

• Condoms - I have been endlessly researching condoms. I think I don't like latex ones, based on my previous experience with latex condoms with the guy I was with. I didn't like how they smelled, and I didn't like the taste they left on the penis itself either.
  • Are there condoms that y'all prefer to use with your partners? Or that you find your partners have a preference for? I was looking at the Skyn Elite condoms or the Trojan Raw Purefeel ones. Of course, I know he'll have his own preference, but I also want to be prepared, just in case.
• Oral sex - the first and only time I've given oral sex the guy basically made me feel horrible and told me that I should watch porn. So! It's not that it's a traumatic experience and I don't want to do it. I actually want to be good at it and want to share that experience with someone I trust.
  • So this is kind of a technical question, but what do you do with your teeth (especially your back ones) while you're actually sucking - doing that motion of sucking specifically? It was kind of difficult to avoid touching his penis with my back teeth on the way back up? My jaw is kind of narrow and I don't know if that's a factor...
• Being on top and being self-conscious. This is more of a mental one. I'm a bit thicker than this man body-wise, and feel very very self-conscious about it as he's pretty lean, muscular, but skinny. And I feel like I'd be too heavy on top (in addition to the anxiety of having little experience being on top). Are there ways to distribute your weight so you don't hurt him or smother him? How do you usually deal with that if your partner is smaller than you?

I am posting this with my GF knowledge and consent, as she wants to work on this issue.

I'm male and me and my girlfriend have been together for over a year, since september we've been on a LDR, I went studying abroad, my GF supported me fully with this decision. I fly back every couple of weeks, I just came back from a visit which began mid december. When we are next to each other we have no problems with intimacy, both of us are very satisfied, as soon as I leave there becomes a problem with my GF getting intimate. We have tried various things, I even bought her a toy, which was used only once by her. No matter what i send, what i do, she cant get herself aroused enough. It's gotten to the point in which i feel bad about mentioning anything intimate and she feels bad for not doing anything. We are in a happy relationship and this is the only bigger problem for us.

Has someone been in this situation? Did anything help?

This is such an awkward and embarrassing question but I’ve found a lot of the positions I feel the need to poop. Missionary and going on top I am fine with but most of the others is a different scenario. It’s ruining the enjoyment of sex for me a little bit. Any tips or ideas how to stop feeling this way?

I gave in. I slept with him, knowing it was against everything I had promised myself and God. At the moment, I tried to convince myself it would make us closer, that maybe he would care for me more. But looking back now, I see how hollow it all was.

I keep replaying everything in my head and I feel so broken. I hate that I compromised my values. I feel so much shame and sadness, especially because I wanted something deeper and meaningful.

The intimacy felt rushed and disconnected. He came thrice and I did all the work. He didn’t hold me afterward or show any real tenderness. I remember him jumping up to clean himself right away. He didn’t even take my shirt off. I told him to stop moving because it hurt, and he continued to thrust. When he drove me home, he said we’d see each other again today. Today is today, and he just told me he’s still out of town… but he’ll see me soon😀

I just feel so alone and the shame is unbearable. I feel like I gave away something I can never get back—to someone who didn’t give a fuck. I miss him so much and I just feel so alone and used. On top of everything, we didn’t use protection, and now I could be pregnant. Easily the dumbest decision I have ever made in my life. I don’t think I’ll ever recover from this. Please give me a hug.