I have had a lot of sex. And a lot of pretty good sex - I’ve had long term partners that gave me multiple orgasms in each week. Since my last LTR ended about 2 years ago, I have turned to getting my “romance” fix from audiobooks, which evolved into pleasuring myself while listening to the more explicit scenes.

The combination of my favorite toy and the erotic audio gives me the most mind blowing climaxes of my life. Better than anything I have ever had with a partner. The quality does depend on the story/scene, however. Why I get the best O’s with an audiobook is a whole diff conversation that I have some theories about.

I have tried to date recently (after a long voluntary hiatus) and it’s just… I don’t know. So far it hasn’t been worth it. I feel like I have to give up these amazing climaxes to give a LTR a chance. I always feel bad when I’m having sex and can’t climax and want to use my favorite toy. I guess I’m assuming that the guy will be hurt or angry when he learns that any O he gives me can’t compare to that. It would be amazing if I could bring in the erotic audio too but I assume he would think that was weird…

Has anyone had experience with a partner introducing erotic audio stories to the bedroom? How has that gone? Would love input from men and women - thanks.

Hello.I live in a country where women who want to have sex are considered as "slut''.I dont talk about sex with my friends too much.I had sex before with my ex boyfriends.However,I want to express my body more.I would like to have some friends whom I can talk about sex positivism with.Thanks.

me and my partner (WLW both cis) had a talk earlier tonight because i expressed i was feeling awkward about sex. the best way i was able to put it was that it was in a way feeling like a task, not because i wasn’t interested or enjoying it, but because initiation seemed very formal. we both have been in situations where sex was expected kind of regardless, and neither of us want to make each other uncomfortable. but when she asks me “are you maybe in the mood to fool around a little later?” i just recently have been like … eh?

The only real pattern I’ve noticed among my IRL friends is that other ppl on the autism spectrum like myself actually tend to be a bit less weird about sex than NTs because we don’t give a fuck about dumb social convention for the sake of dumb social convention (and most of us are either on the hypersexual or borderline ace ends of the spectrum because of how our sensory issues manifest). Do y’all know of any other groups of ppl that tend to be disproportionately sex positive?

We're still relatively new(less than one year) to actively being sex positive. Usually my fiance puts her sex toys away in her drawer but other times just leaves them on the nightstand or our bed. On New Years we had some friends over, and our second bathroom is off of our bedroom, so guests saw her wand and vibrator every time they had to use that bathroom. I realized that close to midnight and put them away.

We only had close friends over and they're open minded so nobody made a big fuss, nobody even mentioned it but I know they had to have seen them on the nightstand right by the bathroom door. But since then it got me thinking, was I ashamed that people saw the toys or was it respecting them by not having it on display. Our household is sex positive with discussions and none of us bat an eye, my daughter even has the same habit of leaving her toy on her nightstand and it's not a big deal.

It's not like we will start leaving toys out on the coffee table in the living room. But does anyone have an opinion on sex toy etiquette with guests? If guests pass through the bedroom is it assumed there is a risk of seeing sex toys?

Not being judgemental just curious what the appeal is

I really struggle to wrap my head around this, because I (20M) feel like it's considered taboo to talk about sexual topics with my female friends or that it'd be rude if I expressed that I'm sexually attracted to them.

How do people who are friends end up having sex with each other or having a conversation about wanting to have sex with each other?

Hey yall. Im serving in the military currently and to be honest sometimes i just wish for people that are open for sexting M or F to chat with. I searched many R/sext... forums but did not find any where there are actually people who want to do it for fun. Its always either a OF Model or a Bot who wants to sell stuff. I almost fell for one. So my question is is there any Webside or Reddit places/ Telegramm channels and so on where actually Sexpositive people interact with eachothers? Where there is a chance to maybe find a serious sexting partner? I really like sex themes and stuff and to be honest i dont get any sex or similar things at all in the military. Thats why im searching for a sextingpartner on ??? Websides.

I'm not sure what to do. She gets great pleasure from me. And i have taught her to touch herself which she is experimenting with herself. The pleasure is great in both cases, she moans a lot and she says it feels soo good, but she also feels really disappointed in that she cannot orgasm even when she touches herself. Except in dreams. We try to have long sessions for 2-3 hours but it just doesn't get there. I know depression meds can affect sex but... I figured it was just a matter of getting to know each other sexually over the months, as suggested earlier but while the sex has gotten so good i still feel disappointed in myself because i want her to get a orgasm too. She says she wants to feel one like i do, to feel finished and content.

Our plans so far is to get some lube, she gets dry down there after long periods of fingering her and the whole come hither finger motion combined with gentle pressure on the spot on the stomach that connects with it. She really likes that one, she starts laughing, crying and is otherwise not really speakable to, legs shaking and muscles inside doing things. Lube might work so i can rub her for longer but also to explore herself better.

Any ideas? What has worked for people here in similar situations?

Two days ago my wife opened up a discussion about opening up the relationship. At first I was excited and curious but online research brought more and more questions, needs that I didn’t know I have and insecurities all along the way.

We agreed to do the research on our own and talk about findings.

Since then we talked accumulated less then 20 minutes about it. She is working overtime, at home the only time window to talk is when the kid sleeps and when he is asleep she was like „let’s watch Netflix and cuddle“.

I have to reduce overtime so have plenty of time to do the research these days. I had a lot of insecurities and I wanted people to talk to. So I did something stupid. I registered us in a dating app. In uploaded a casual photos of me with face and of her looking away from the camera and started liking couples. I started writing to one of our matches very intense about all my feelings and questions and insecurities and it was a great relief for me. When I showed her the app she got mad at me because of the online photos and GDPR reasons. She deleted the account and left the room. Since then we didn’t talk about anything except chores, kid and weekend planning.

I feel lost and anxious.

Ok, so... I guess the actual question is more specific than that, but... I'm a bi woman, though my attraction leans heavily towards women (say 95/5). I've never actually been with a guy and ultimately I see myself ending up with a woman, but I'm still interested in sleeping with men.

The thing is, I feel like there's a lot of societal baggage with regards to sex between men and women that I kinda have a hard time getting past (like, as an example, how a lot of porn treats women). And also, I think if I got even a whiff of like toxic masculinity or misogyny from a guy I would instantly lose interest. And as someone who is not really interested in seriously dating guys, it kinda feels like it wouldn't make sense to do a lot of vetting to make sure those things wouldn't be a problem.

Recently I saw a "documentary" (that's what the video called itself, but I think that's far too generous for what it was) about an OF model who slept with 100 guys in a day. Now I'm not trying to start a conversation about this story, but I'm bringing this up because the video definitely was made with the angle that she regretted the experience (and a lot of comments saying that she was "broken" by the end of it) but that's not exactly what I saw (not to say it was a wholly positive experience for her). And I think a part of it is that to some extent she owns that, like, imbalance that exists between men and women in the bedroom, and it got me thinking. Because it's not like I find that dynamic necessarily off-putting, but I feel like a lot of guys do end up making the interaction degrading.

So I guess the actual question is, is it possible to engage in casual sex with less than ideal partners/circumstances and still come away with your self respect/esteem intact?

So me and my GF have been together for coming up on 2 years now and she said to me two nights ago that she would like to try watching porn together.

Here comes the issue. We are both black but she's made it pretty clear she isn't a fan of white peoples. Idk if it's because of growing up in a predominantly white environment or if there's just been a lot of bad experiences/ negativity from peers but the distain is there.

On my side, I actually think white people are nice. I didn't have a ton of bad experiences or anything like that, on the contrary I've found that a lot of white people were very welcoming to me as a kid and that feeling of not being on edge just transferred to adulthood. My therapist reminds me of my 8th grade English teacher (white / Albanian), my previous boss reminded me of my first workplace crush (don't tell HR that's why I chose that location).

Anyway, I typically enjoy PAWG porn or actresses of the lighter variety (minus a few exceptions). I think this would probably cause some issues (whether it's going to be her feeling some type of angry/insecure or just unable to get off I don't know). I asked her to pick something and we kind of just got potato's the idea till we gave up.

The other concern I have is she's been opening up to me about POSSIBLY adding a second girl. I'm 99% certain it's implied she means a black woman but personally if I were to add a third it would probably be a white or Asian person.

Is there a good way to talk about this or do I just kind come out and say it?

I started a sub specifically for women who love women to discuss polyamory (and other flavors of ENM).

It's a sex positive space intended to prioritize the voices of women. Its trans, queer, and bi/pan friendly.

Its not an R4R space.

Stop by if this appeals to you. It's just getting started, but I think the demand is there.

r/sapphicpoly

https://www.reddit.com/r/sapphicpoly/s/qGZSDEalQP

For me, it's absolutely crucial to know that my partner is sexually satisfied with me.

My girlfriend and I seem to have great chemistry in bed. She shows a lot of signs of pleasure during our intimate moments, but outside of those moments, she has never given me any feedback or compliments—zero.

This makes me feel anxious and insecure because I worry she might be faking some reactions in the moment just to make me happy.

But then I think: if her goal were just to keep me happy and relaxed, wouldn’t she also give me (even fake) compliments afterward? I mean, it wouldn’t make sense to fake an orgasm so convincingly during sex and then not be able to fake satisfaction with words later, right?

When I say “convincingly,” I mean some of her reactions feel incredibly spontaneous—for example, strong contractions that seem to push me out of her.

I just can’t figure this out. I rely a lot on feedback and verbal communication in general. Hearing her say positive things about our relationship or about me is one of the things that makes me happiest—but when it comes to sex, she doesn’t say anything at all.

I’ve tried to bring this up before, but when I do, she becomes distant and gives very short, cold responses, almost as if my doubts annoy her.

(For context, I’ve always been very attentive during sex, asking her what she likes and making sure I put in effort with foreplay and other things.)

Not sure if this is the subreddit for it but I've always wanted to learn how to twerk and I just could never get the motion down. I really want to get it down for my bf but I just don't know how so any advice or pointing me in the right direction would be appreciated.

But I’m glad my boyfriend can’t say he’s never made his girlfriend cum :)

Laying next to him after he finished giving me cunnilingus and I’m just smiling so wide lol. I used to have a bf who went down on me all the time even when I wasn’t sure I wanted it, but that can’t compare to fully consenting when it feels right and special, and helping him learn how to use his tongue on me is really cute and sweet. So many girls trash on guys for not knowing how to eat them out, all it takes is a little patience and communication.

I’d love to hear women who ENJOY wearing thongs, either for comfort or because it makes them feel sexy.

I have a few lacy pairs from VS which my guy friend likes me to wear. It drives him crazy.

Problem is they’re kind of uncomfortable. He especially likes to have sex with me while they’re still on, just pulled to the side. I just feel awkward like my butt crack is being flossed, so I prefer to take them off and be naked.

I’ve also read about women who wear them around town, at the gym, etc, which is unfathomable to me.

I wonder how I can come around to enjoy wearing them more. Is it a matter of confidence? Choosing more comfortable brands? Please share your thoughts 🙏

So I see a lot of people talking about how women get shamed for their sexuality (and I'm sure that's true). but what I don't see a lot of people talking about, is men being shamed for their sexuality too. to give some examples, men are always told that they are just pigs. "men are just dirty disgusting pigs, all they care about is sex blah blah blah" It makes me as a man feel ashamed of my sexuality, and that my sexuality is not welcome anywhere. if teenagers want to insult a teenage boy, they call him a masturbator. "You jerk off in your free time!" I saw on this 'best of 2018 porn' or something, one of the female hosts said "they look so ugly doing it", referring to videos of men masturbating. on dating apps when women talk about sex on their profiles, I feel like 90% of the time it's to say something negative about it. I've seen several women put this meme "my favourite sex position is you in therapy". Again, it makes me feel like my sexuality is simply not welcome, and it's seen as gross.

This is something I feel very strongly about. It's my own personal elephant in the room. So I really feel like I want to express it. I don't feel a lot of people are talking about this. I do feel like I'm the lone voice saying this. I'm sure a lot of people here (and elsewhere) will disagree with me. I may get attacked also. if you feel the need to attack me, please ask yourself why. I am not trying to attack anyone here. I am not trying to diminish women's problems in any way. So please, let's not make this into a competition about who suffers more. I'm not trying to start a competition or a fight. I'm just trying to share my perspective: that men get shamed for their sexuality too.

I want us all to get along and I try to keep an open mind. I may not see as much cases of women geting sex shamed, but it doesn't mean it doesn't happen. it could be my own biased lenses that I see the world through, as a man. I don't know what it's like to be a woman, so I try to keep an open mind. I would love to find a community where my sexuality can be loved, or at the very least accepted. but I feel like it's difficult to find such a community. I wish I felt more welcome in the sex positive community.

So just curious, as it's a constant discussion with the hubs. He loves putting me and seeing me in, let's say, situations. Clubs, bondage, with toys, etc. He loves humiliating me, and I, luckily, love being humiliated and I am an exhibitionist at my core. Is this sub/dom? I love to serve him in this sense - as it really turns him on but I am just naturally into all of this as well. I really do feel like I belong to him and there is literally no one else in my fantasies but him when it comes to someone in charge. We always discuss if we are sub/dom as we're pretty equal in all other parts of our lives. I feel it is... kind of.. but would love to discuss.

28 year old non binary here. Grew up around purity culture, lack of sex education, shaming of sex in general and idolisation of arranged(read: forced) marriages and "the one" romantic ideals. These things have always annoyed me ever since I was a teenager. But I managed to find people who were more open minded, relaxed, sex postive in a healthy way, not in an objectification way.

Over time, I've met more and more people like that and when I went to a bigger city for college, I was relieved to be around so many cool people who had the live and let live attitude. Men, women, and people of all genders.

About a year or so ago, I got back to reading and writing fanfiction, as I had free time and I thought, hey, I should write the smut that I think should be more of. Yes, I'm an ao3 writer.

For writing advice and reccomendations, I followed a lot of authors on social media. Needless to say, the algorithm soon started reccomending stuff. On almost every video of a woman talking about smut, there's always someone slut-shaming and calling women "porn addicts." And then there's the authors who promote their books as "it doesn't have dirty filthy sex and is pure and clean."

For some reason, these things make me boil at my core and makes me want to throw my phone on the wall. I really needed to vent here and wanted some advice on taking a chill pill.

Thanks.

I'm doing a bit of writing and I'm looking for a point of reference. Has there ever been a society that could be described as sex-positive? Not like, a small commune or anything, I'm talking bare minimum the size of a town.

Hello, my bf and I have been experimenting with anal play for quite some time now. I find it extremely arousing and he likes it as well so it's kind of our fantasy. I have a normal sized but plug that I like to wear it when we have sex and recently bought a slightly bigger one to try it out. I tried it out on my own the first time but I just could not fit it in... I don't know why, maybe I was just not relaxed enough but at one point I felt a bit of pain so I stopped. Second time he tried it on me and he had no problems sliding it in... maybe because we took our time and he had played with his finger before and we also used a lot of lube. This was also the first time we had full on anal sex meaning the first time he was able to enter fully and very deep and I enjoyed it a lot. Other times he was only able to enter just a little bit or maybe only once and then I would need him to pull out because I felt I was not relaxed enough and started to feel pain. Does anyone else feel like you need a full 30 min at least for stretching and feeling relaxed before anal sex? Also, can someone share some advice on anal cleansing? It this a rule of thumb before anal sex? I haven't had any issues until now with this but my bf would like to cum inside of me while doing anal and I kind of want him to as well and I don't know if a cleanse is necessary before that. Thank you for your advice!😊

Hi there

I'm an exhibitionist female, and I'm wondering if there is a club you can recommend where I can be completely naked. I would go with my partner, who would likely wear a really expensive suit - but I'd only want boots to protect my feet. Completely naked otherwise. Assume it's not too big of a deal, so I'm looking for good club recommendations where this would be accepted or even appreciated. Have not done it before, so perhaps this is pretty vanilla for many but not for me. We're open to travelling within Europe. Nothing sleezy, and we'd love classy and positive. Thank you!

does anybody have a link to the ethical gangbang forum that helped organize aella’s birthday gangbang? i was explaining it to an inquiring friend but couldn’t find the webpage

Can we normalized sucking your friends dick when they are horny?😭 I know it's impossible but why not it would just be better. Less hate, more orgasm, more people sucking eachother off. Like when you are just alone with a group of friends and don't know what to do you could just say "I'm kinda horny" and then ask for someone to help you and that would be so cool. You don't even need to be gay (I'm bi) but like, helping a friend it's cool and if everyone had an open mentality I think no one would find it so embarrassing

Wanted to see if anyone else gave or received any sex toys for Christmas! I personally bought a lot for friends and others and was happy to receive a few dildos, vibrators and anal toys.

I (m36) am married to (f33). We have a kid and want more. We are both introvert and have insecurities regarding our bodies and sexuality. For years she now and then dropped a comment that she would like to have sex with a girl but in last time it got much more frequent.

I don’t know how to deal with these comments. Today I answered that if she is serious we can look for a girl to join us and she was like “yeah sure, we an obese couple are looking for you sexy thin girl to join us in bed” (In a sarcastic voice). I could do good with 30kg less but she isn’t obese at all. I almost can see her abs.

However, her answer wasn’t “nah, just kidding”. I don’t really know if she really wants this. I don’t know how to talk with her about this and if to talk at all. Our sexual life had his ups and downs the last years.