Hi All, I have been with my boyfriend (29,M) for 4 years, and I(27,F) am still unable to have sex (penetration) with him. Due to my family background and having some sort of purist mindset inculcated into me while growing up, I took a long time to become more intimate with my bf, and I really appreciate him being so patient with me.

Currently, we have done everything except for penetrative sex. We have tried a few times, however I was too tight and he told me it felt like hitting into a wall.

Because of this, we suspect that I have vaginismus, and thought one of the ways to help me relax is by having me play with dilators or fingering myself. Frankly, I have only matsurbated from my clit, I get scared from the idea of having something inside my vagina and have never been able to finger myself …. Even when my bf does it I felt really weird and raw too. He has only been able to put in one finger as of now.

Should I get medical help or continue to try fingering myself instead? We both know this is most likely a psychological problem and are not sure how to proceed.

I just fucked so good 4x back to back that I was forgetting my friends names afterword when I was trying to send funny memes. 😌

I am a 26F. I have been going through a breakup and have some mental health issues. I have been masturbating since childhood and now i realised recently i have been masturbating approx 20-60 times a day. Didn't really count but approx count according to each orgasm. Am i abnormal? What should i do. Help

My husband (32M) recently decided to stop watching porn and masturbating. It was his decision and I had no input until the decision was made and I supported him. But then he started talking about how he isn’t sure I (30F) can keep up with him or keep him satisfied enough to support him stopping that. I don’t feel like it’s on me to fully do that? I don’t like the expectation that 1. I’m not enough and 2. That I HAVE to take care of his every hard-on. I’ve tried explaining that but maybe I’m not wording it right to him. I struggle with being a bit too blunt and not explaining things well. Am i looking at this wrong? The more he says things like that, the less i want sex in the first place.

For more side information to fill in some of the story:

1. We’ve been married for 6 years

2. We (usually) have sex 1-2x week. Sometimes can go a bit without sex if we are busy. We have discussed it and he would prefer everyday and i said 2 scheduled days was the best i could do right now

3. We have two kids under 5 that make it so I’m a bit touched out and want nothing near me.

4. I also have ADHD and struggle with staying in the moment, initiating of even remembering sex is even a thing sometimes.

So I’m in a long distance relationship. The pics I’ve been sending have been pretty bland. It’s very hard for me to get into the headspace to take them, but I do want be more sexual. I was wondering how to spice it up with videos/photos. And if there was anything else I could do that would spice it up

So I’m 24 and on about four medications that struck my libido six feet under. I stopped masturbating, barely ever felt the want or need. But now I’ve seemed to regulate and my drive is back. However, it seems like the mental and physical aren’t linking up right. Even if I’m super turned on, been thinking about getting home and relaxing all day—when I’m actually doing it, it always takes like 15-20 minutes. I used to be able to have two or three back to back, but now even a second orgasm takes around 10 or so more minutes. I keep seeing posts about women being able to orgasm in anywhere from 5 minutes to like 30 seconds.

Is 15-20 minutes at least somewhat normal? I only have solo experience really, so I’m not sure how it would be with a partner, but I suspect even longer.

Ladies suggest me a very thin and long g spot vibrator. I personally don't like putting stuff in but i want to explore it. I get stressed every time i try to put something in even tampons. So i want a soft thin easy insertable long vibrator

I(24f) have some kind of undiagnosed vaginal/uterine issues that make sex VERY painful at times. It has plagued me for years, making me very anxious around having sex in general. I now have an amazing partner(28m) who has been seemingly very understanding, however he is a man with above average sized “equipment” so the need to stop for breaks or completely stop in the middle of sex due to excruciating pain is more frequent than in past relationships. He is much more sexually experienced than I am and he wants to try a variety of different positions and different intensities, however I find myself having to retreat to the same one boring position just to spare myself pain and still allow both of us to finish. I feel horrible because I can just tell he wants to do more but out of respect and sparing my feelings he always tells me it’s fine and that he still enjoyed himself. This has slowly been eating at me because I feel guilty that I can’t fully fulfill his desires due to whatever is wrong with my body. I feel boring, I feel like a disappointment, especially when it gets so bad that we have to fully stop due to the pain. He’s so wonderful, and I always try…however the attempts often fall flat due to me just not being able to handle it. Any advice on how to cope with this immense guilt would be deeply appreciated and if anyone has experienced anything similar please give me some guidance! Thank you!

TLDR: I experience a lot of pain during sex and it is limiting my ability to have fun sex with my partner which has impacted my self esteem deeply. Help!

i (20f) have officially entered my first relationship around five months ago. i’ve never officially dated anyone, besides from a few flings, and i have a question for everyone on here. is it normal to be attracted to other people besides your partner? not in the sense that in public i see a person who i think is hot and want to be with. i don’t experience wanting anyone but them relationship wise, and i don’t desire this relationship with anyone else.

but i masturbate to porn while theyre away, and i find that i am much more mentally stimulated through other men/women in porn or when i read/other stuff. i tried to imagine if my partner was doing the same things and sent it to me, i don’t think i would be as attracted bc turned on. our sex life is fine and i am definitely attracted to them, but i never felt particularly in love with their looks. we started off as friends for 2 years before dating officially, so i never saw them in that light before i began feeling attracted the more i got to know them. but is it normal for them to not be the most sexually attractive person? i sometimes imagine doing things with sexy strangers, and get more arousef thinking that and us .

i don’t know. i’m just not sure if this is normal. i would never cheat or hurt them, and at the end of the day the only person who i could comfortably commit my life to is them.

We’re not first timers, the three of us have gotten together multiple times. But this time it will be part of my birthday celebration! So I’m looking for fun new stuff for us to try! We’ve dabbled with BDSM, roleplay, and spicy games. What else can we try? Also any ideas on creative positions or techniques or things like that we can try 😊

ummm hi I feel super awkward doing this but advice is extremely needed. I need tips on how to ride. everytime I get ontop it just won’t go in but idk if that’s because I’m worried about doing it.

plz hell

I have been married for 3 years and still can’t take more than one finger. Even one finger still hurts. My partner is 6’3” , having long fingers with big knuckles. I’m around 5’5”. We do use sex toys.

Hey guys, I'm lame and suck at dirty talk lol, like responding to sexy stuff the guy says. When a guy says something like "Oh my god I've been waiting all week for this/I've been imagining doing this to you for so long/etc", what's a good, natural response that isn't cringe or contrived? I don't like using the word "daddy" or anything, I like saying straightforward stuff like "you feel so good inside me", etc. So something along those lines.

&& before this gets weird the "tell" is completely unsexual in nature and is somewhat absent minded... watch how they pet a dog they like.

Do they appear to be a kindergarten creating a hatch drawing while death gripping crayon: quick movements back and forth, no rhythm, mentally on autopilot?

Or

Do they get in there rubbing the tense neck muscles while simultaneously scratching? Maybe not having full focus on dog but doesn't go into autopilot kindergarten crayon drawing either.

I'm 2/2 and since the last one I married I have given up my research. So laddies... can your man pet that dawg?🫡 🐕

Just looking for some advice. I (20F) was sexually active with my ex for 2 years until we broke up a year ago. In that time, before and even now I have never felt like I could orgasm.

I feel like I’ve tried everything I can within my budget. I feel turned on sometimes but when i go to touch myself I’ll feel good for like 5 seconds before the feeling fades and I just feel lost afterwards.

It’s also worth mentioning that I struggle with anxiety (relaxing is very hard for me) and eczema on my fingers (I flare up from the heat and my own wetness (idk if that’s what it’s called but I’m calling it that.))

I have a vibrator, it’s never done anything for me and as mentioned, touching my clit hurts quickly due to my condition. Any tips at all?

I think I'm experiencing post nut clarity as a woman . I feel shame because I had to back down on a boundary just so my partner would have sex with me. I feel disappointed, down, sadness, and a lot of shame. Nothing was wrong with the sex but the good feeling only lasted during sex. All I feel now is shame because my partner was refusing to sleep with me unless I drop a boundary. Have any women experienced this? How do you navigate it?

Try to keep this short n to the point. 45F here and I've always been in serious relationships with men. I have never experienced being with another woman, man or more than me and the man I'm with. I've never gotten tonreally explore myself (my own body) never got much into it. Anyways,, need help understanding some things. I love to look at women and they do turn me on sometimes. But then I think about being intimate with a woman and it doesn't feel right. But I think about it or watch it I get horny and wet. But still couldn't fathom doing anything with another woman. WHY is this? If I have the attraction and think it's hot then why am I so afraid to want to try anything like it??.

I've been married for 20 years, and my husband and I have had a resurgence in our sex life. Previously, 100% of the time he did oral, I always had an orgasm. Now the past few times, it feels good but not mind blowing. I've tried abstaining for a while (over a week) and nothing. :( I can still have an orgasm by myself, and I can do it if touch myself or use a vibe during PIV sex. I miss my oral orgasms...they were the best. :( :( :( Would love any advice. TIA.

This wasn’t an issue until I started having sex with my bf, before that I never really squirted or peed. I always felt too sensitive to go for multiple orgasms, but after seeing him something clicked and it happens almost every time I use my vibrator, but also when I’m using my standard plug + fingers on my vulva

We had sex recently and I legit emptied my bladder all over him, just on the first orgasm. He said he likes it but I’m tired of the mess, it also sometimes smells like pee which is such a pain to clean up.

I try to just use my hands and maybe I won’t cause as big of a mess, but it’s really tough for me and some fluid always comes out. Wondering what I should do..because I don’t want to do this every time. It does feel amazing but the cleanup is awful

Pretty much the title, but I (F18) am disgusted with myself. Not just like masterbation either I was with my boyfriend last night (we are both virgins 18 and 19 year olds) and we were touching each other a bit, he wanted me to and I wanted to at the time but within about 5 minutes after it stopped I felt this massive wave of guilt and disgust with myself and disappointment. I really don’t know what to do at this point, I’m ready for sex but I know that if I ever do it I will feel such severe guilt like I always do and I don’t even know why I feel guilty it’s not Jesus or god related or anything. I also think I might have ptsd or cptsd Can anyone help?..

Am I bugging or can u smell urself ovulating. It does NOT smell bad at all. Perfect ph. Just very strong and through clothes

I’m currently pregnant, 24w. I am…frankly horny often. Problem is, with the growing bump, and things feeling different down there, sex can often be uncomfortable, which is a massive fucking bummer. My sex life with my husband used to be pretty active and decent, and now it’s like a ghost town in bed.

Do y’all have any advice?? Like any positions that y’all were able to work around the bump? I’m concerned because he’s not even as big as he is going to get and I’m already struggling 😭

Let me preface this by saying I will make an appointment with a gynecologist on Monday if my symptoms don’t get better.

So a few days ago, (4 days to be exact), I had brown spotting in my underwear. This is how my period usually starts, so I figured my period was starting 2 or 3 days early. Surprisingly, it’s been 4 days and I’m still only having the brown discharge. I’ve never experienced this ever in my life, but I had chalked it up to stress as this last month was very stressful for me, but I also had unprotected sex exactly a month ago before the start of my last period. I do not use birth control at all, my partner and I rely solely on my menstrual calendar and use condoms except for right before and during my period.

I know it’s best to ask a doctor, and I will, but does anyone know what this could be? I’ve never experienced this before in my entire 15 years of having a period, so I’m not sure what to think. I’m hoping it’s just stress.

i recently started masturbation and the sensation is wonderful until i finish and then i feel very guilty. my family is christian and I grew up being taught that its a sin to do it. i don’t believe that anymore but for some reason the feeling im doing something wrong and shameful is very strong. does this feeling go away? I want to learn how to enjoy my body before i start dating and have sex.

i’m 23 years old and i recently came out as a lesbian. i did identify as bi before that but i barely slept with women, it was mainly men. they would struggle to get me off or even to make me have a good time. i’ve been hooking up with this girl and we have really fun sex, and i actually look forward to and love sex for the first time in a long time. my issue is i’m struggling to get over the edge and orgasm. i’m not sure if it’s because i’m nervous or if i’m thinking about it too much or what, but it feels really good and like i’m getting close but i just can’t get over that part to actually cum. does anyone have any advice? usually she’ll go down on me or finger me both of which can feel really great but i’d love to be able to get off for her and for myself.

Most sex talk I hear from women tends to put a lot of emphasis on the clitoris and how pleasurable it is, but I've never felt much of anything from it. And when I say the clit, I mean both the glans and g-spot. I haven't messed around much with the rest of the internal structure so far, but I kinda doubt I'd have more luck with it.

Stimulation to it doesn't hurt thankfully, but there's absolutely nothing going on down there. No matter how much I try to work with it or how aroused I am, it's about as sensitive as any other part of my body. At best I can occasionally feel a hint of something when I get rough with it (tugging, flicking, etc), but to call it pleasure would be a stretch, let alone something that's supposed to be capable of bringing me to an 'earth-shattering orgasm' like so many articles like to tout.

It makes getting in the mood a lot harder, let alone achieving anything substantial. To reach a point where I'm even moderately satisfied (not even orgasming most the time, mind you), it can take hours. Plural. Compared to my partner, who can climax in just a couple minutes with decent clitoral stimulation, I often feel like a sexual dud because of how woefully undersensitive my clit is.

So, what gives? I'm 20 years old and not taking any sort of medication. Did I draw a particularly bad lot with my genes? Is my hypothyroidism messing with me that badly? Or have I just been doing things completely wrong this whole time?

First time tampon user, today was the 1st day as mentioned in previous post.

So, my tampon was soaked (even leaking), so I didn't expect extraction will feel a sharp pain (I kept a liner as I was worried about leakage).

I thought that since my tampon is full it will act as lubricant and not be painful.

was it painful because it was my first time or is this normal? I am also a virgin, so not sure if my vagina was just sensitive because it was first time something went in there? Will the pain stop once I get used to it? How long did it take you to get used to it? Is the pain normal on extraction? (I used the light tampon on heavy flow as I read it is easier to start with light and then go up on absorbency when it is the first time-Tampax article).

Also, for the rest of the day I chickened out from using the tampon and switched to pad, but I will try again tomorrow. Ahhaha kinda proud for getting through the first day of tampon. 😅 But I am scared about tomorrow because since it'll be my day 3, my flow will be medium rather than heavy which means I may need to extract it before it is full. And if it was painful taking out on heavy flow, I am afraid how painful taking it out will be on medium flow because parts of it may be dry? Any tips on making it less painful to extract on medium flow? Because the tampon may not be entirely full on medium flow. And I took it out at the same angle I inserted it with(suggestion by Tampax article). Insertion was painless just sitting on hard surface caused sharp pain and no pain on soft surfaces and then a commenter suggested it needs to be readjusted, so I did that. Tampax article says it could be due to wrong absorbency for flow so choose correct absorbency, but I used light tampon on heavy flow, so it shouldn't have hurt on extraction. And the pain felt only on the left side far inside. Not at the entrance.

I do want to make a permanent switch to tampon from pads because tampons don't cause the mess that pads do on each trip to the washroom. It is easier to clean up and washroom visit is faster which saves time. I just want to use pad overnight only as I end up sleeping for more than 8 hours and tampons need to be removed within 8 hours window. So, I want to reserve tampons for day use.

Thank you for bearing with my questions! ❤️

The title says it all. so lately I have had a real epiphany and have been trying to be better and live better. Upon self reflection I have realized I have been a bad girlfriend and a bad person more broadly.

I have hurt my current boyfriend in many ways chief among which being me cheating on him. I have told him and after much deliberation he has agreed to give me a second chance and I want to stay with him to own up to my past mistakes.

One thing that I was already doing before this but have kicked into overdrive now is being more sexually submissive. He has enjoyed this and I have enjoyed it more then I thought I would.

Now let me get to the main meat of the post, I am still a little confused about how being a female submissive compares to a malesub in a femdom dyanmic. femdom is so hot and different while femsub just feels like vanilla sex with surface level additions like name calling.

So if you could give me more guidance I would appreciate that

Some things I have tried and he has liked include

Worshiping his body

Dressing up like a maid and serving him

Kissing his feet

What made you try it and what’s your favorite part and how long did it take you to start enjoying it.

I had a transvaginal ultrasound the other day and it showed something abnormal so I have to repeat it. The problem is that it really hurt. She had a hard time getting it in and had to apply a lot of pressure before it finally popped through. Every time she moved it, it felt like I was being stabbed. The Dr. wants me to come back because I have to repeat my pap as well and she thinks doing it all in the same day might be a good idea so I don’t have extra time to over think. She offered me some medicine to calm me down but is there anything I can do to help it hurt less?

Edit to add: I’ve never been sexually active