/r/TwoXSex

Photograph via snooOG

You know those nitty gritty details you can only talk about with your best friend? Well, here is TwoXSex: a place for women to bare all about their experiences, concerns, questions, anything you may want to talk about when it comes to doing the deed (or anything leading up to it). This might include technique, initiation tactics, grooming, "is this normal?," and everything in between.

Hello Sexy Ladies & Welcome to TwoXSex!

You know those things you can only talk about with your best friend? Well, here you can get a few more opinions/answers/stories. There are certain things to which only a woman can relate so let's talk about it!

Positions, Lingere, First timers, Masturbation, Toys, Orgies, Lesbian sex, Orgasms, Grooming, ProTips, Techniques, Anatomy.. and anything else sex!

Message the Mods ♡

*TwoXSex Rules *

  1. This is a sub for women to discuss sex with other women. If OP asks a question, assume they are asking for a woman's perspective unless otherwise specified. Men are welcome but should not use this subreddit to get our opinion (please use /r/askwomen for general questions and /r/sex or /r/relationships for those regarding specific individuals). Men who comment should understand that they are a guest and be respectful This includes not commenting on posts flaired as "women only".

  2. Transphobia is not tolerated. Anyone who considers herself a lady is a lady.

  3. Any links containing pornographic images or particularly graphic text should be marked NSFW. Please report links that are not properly marked.

  4. Please refrain from posting pornographic videos/ photos.

  5. Keep links diverse and interesting. No blogspam, especially from your own site. DO NOT use this subreddit as a feed for your or anyone else's blog. Frequent linking will result in a warning, followed by a ban. If you see someone breaking this rule egregiously, we recommend reporting them to the admins in addition to sending us a modmail.

  6. When posting links or other content, please add comments in order to facilitate discussion.

  7. Be civil. Personal attacks, foul language, and antagonistic behavior will result in your post being removed and possibly a ban from the sub. We welcome and value different viewpoints and discussion - just as long as no one is deliberately trying to devalue or hurt someone.

  8. No soliciting pictures, DMs, videos ect.

  9. No advertising. This is not the place to advertise/ sell your onlyfans, cam site, snapchat ect.

  10. Do not use this sub to try and pick up or flirt with women.

  11. Be sex positive (no slut-shaming).

  12. Make sure you are not posting “bad women’s anatomy”, pseudoscience or misinformation.

  13. No victim blaming.

  14. Don’t be creepy.

  15. No "am I pregnant?" or "Will I get pregnant?" posts. No one here can answer those questions for you!

*TwoXSex Additional Guidelines *

The subject matter will contain mature/adult material, read at your own risk. While we are happy to discuss medical concerns, we are no substitute for your doctor.

The moderators are here for you, so please don’t hesitate to message us. Hit the report button on comments or links that break rules, especially personal attacks!

And remember, guy or girl, there's no substitute for opening up dialogue with your partner! We love talking about sex, but when it comes to what your partner might like, no one knows it better than they do! :)

Human sexuality varies widely among individuals. Readers come here with varying levels of experience, and we don't always share the same values.

Please be welcoming. There is no need to comment unless you have something constructive to add to the discussion.

Useful/Important Links:

Related subreddits

/r/TwoXChromosomes

/r/Sex

/r/AskWomen

/r/BirthControl

/r/ActualLesbians

/r/Relationships

/r/BodyAcceptance

/r/TrollXChromosomes

/r/BDSMCommunity

/r/TryingForABaby

/r/ainbow

/r/Feminism

/r/SexPositive

/r/TheGirlSurvivalGuide/

/r/vaginismus

/r/QueerSexEdForAll

Thanks to /u/NkwyRngMynd, winner of the 2,000 user celebration art contest, for Blushing Alien, our new mascot

/r/TwoXSex

140,619 Subscribers

2

Has anyone had a FWB? Did it turn into a real dating relationship?

What kind of terms did you set up before everything started?

Who was the first to break them if it turned into more

Was your intention before agreeing to a FWB to make them more?

Outside of the benefits part of the FWB, did you guys do more (hang out, go on dates, ect)

6 Comments
2024/06/21
02:52 UTC

17

Penis shapes!

So, a previous post inspired me to ponder this what is I believe to be an under-discussed topic!

Penis shapes!

My newish, current partner has a more prominent mushroom head, my previous long-term partner was more of a straight, even fella, and I had a little fun in between, and none of them were similar to the others!

I enjoyed both my previous long-term partner and my current partner, they just bring different sensations, which is so intriguing to me!

Do we have any preferences? Of course, this is a complete generalization, but to a certain degree this matters to me more than size, especially length.

8 Comments
2024/06/20
23:35 UTC

1

not knowing if HE came

I know this isn’t the exact right demographic to post this question but I don’t feel comfortable doing it anywhere else. So I’m just asking about other women’s experience with this and if it’s happened to you before. Basically, my last two partners have both alluded to not being sure if they came.

One said something very similar to “I think I came” and the other said “I’m not sure if I came” like???? Wouldn’t they know??? Even if it’s in a very wet environment (beach, in the rain, horrible idea, pls don’t judge) and you can’t actually feel like cum, like?? can’t they feel the orgasm???

It’s making me feel I didn’t do a good job if they couldn’t really tell. Anyone with partners that they’re more communicative with have this experience?

5 Comments
2024/06/20
23:35 UTC

5

What does a female orgasm feel like? How can I bring myself to this point with my partner?

I 20F realized that I’ve been masturbating since I was a child. I would grab my thigh and use the edge of my hand to add pressure onto my vulva. I would continuously add pressure and squeeze my thighs until reaching some sort of release. I don’t know if this release would classify as an orgasm. It feels somewhat nice but very underwhelming, with involuntary pelvic muscle contractions following. The feeling lasts a mere few seconds. Reaching this point does not take long, maybe 1-5 minutes depending on my mood. I would also like to add that I do this fully clothed and I have to really tense my body to reach this point. My heartbeat also spike during the release, but I’m not sure due to the “orgasm” itself or due to the tension of my body. Following this release, I feel extremely relaxed, my heart rate gradually decreases, and my breathing slows down. After resting for a bit, I repeat this process again, seeking a second release. This release however, is more intense than the first, and the feeling spreads to my whole pelvic region. I can reach the second “orgasm” in only a few seconds after applying pressure again.

So back to my question, I don’t know if I’ve been orgasming this whole time or not. My first release feels extremely mediocre. The second one is quite nice, but nothing mind blowing or life altering like what the internet describes. It’s also not a full-body sensation and doesn’t last very long. I got my first partner a few months ago and he cannot bring me to an orgasm so I made it a mission to self explore to get to that point myself. However when I try the traditional approach of directly rubbing my clitoris, I don’t feel any sort of pleasure. The only way I can get a remotely pleasurable feeling is when I do this odd technique I’ve been doing since I was small. How can I reach an orgasm with my partner? Have what I’ve been feeling even an orgasm? I need your input redditors!

3 Comments
2024/06/20
23:32 UTC

6

Tips for spicy pics?

I'm going out of town for the weekend and thinking of sending my boyfriend some sexy pics from my hotel room in the downtime between events. Any tips? Thanks 😊

1 Comment
2024/06/20
22:52 UTC

21

Partner didn’t use a condom after I asked him to…could I have been more vocal about my boundaries?

Yesterday I had sex with a partner for the second time. The first time we had sex, we had unprotected sex which was fully consensual - this was roughly a week previously. After this first time, I clearly said to him I did not want to have sex again without a condom. I know this was a stupid idea.

Yesterday, when we were intimate for a second time, we both performed fully consensual oral on each other. I had been drinking and he hadn’t, but I was fully aware of what was happening and fully consenting at this point. Immediately after this had happened (him giving me oral), before any kind of conversation about what would happen next could even take place, he flipped me over and entered me unprotected. I was so taken aback it took me about 20 seconds to ask him to stop and I became really upset. After he stopped I told him it was because I didn’t want to have sex without a condom. He also immediately got dressed and left, telling me “he felt really weird being with someone who got upset whilst he was having sex with them” rather than staying to talk it through.

I know I should have been more vocal this second time about using a condom, repeating myself before anything happened, but part of me thinks the fact I stated this so clearly a week previously means he should have also remembered it anyway? I suppose I am looking for some reassurance that how uncomfortable I feel today is justified. I certainly know that I will be even more vocal about my boundaries in the future.

18 Comments
2024/06/20
13:33 UTC

14

i used a soft tampon for sex last night and cant find it this morning

i think its all the way in the back where i cant reach it i tried squatting and pushing but i just cant find it lmao any tips?

44 Comments
2024/06/20
09:24 UTC

3

Feel super sensitive after I orgasm

Hello, I’m a 32 year old female. I want to know if other women experience this but when I do it with my husband it feels good but when I cum I get super sensitive. I know our bodies change but I liked it before where I could experience multiple orgasms. And now when I am having intercourse with my husband I can only orgasm once because I get sensitive and can’t continue. Do other women experience this? And what do you do? Any suggestions would greatly be appreciated.

5 Comments
2024/06/20
02:37 UTC

6

No privacy and it’s killing me

(18f) recently started sharing my room with my sister (14f) again after having it to myself for months. It’s been a struggle to have some sort of privacy. I love my sister but I can’t wait to move out for uni. So when I had the room for myself I mostly slept naked but I obviously can’t do that now. I mostly wear a long dress to sleep and I wanted to ask if it’s appropriate for me to sleep in my dress without underwear on for hygienic reasons.

5 Comments
2024/06/19
21:48 UTC

79

I have a pregnancy kink and I feel like a pervert.

22F. I’ve had this fetish my entire life and if I’ll be honest, few things have turned me on as quickly as seeing a heavily pregnant person. Obviously, these days I don’t react to pregnancy the way I used to as a teenager, where even the implication of it used to set me off, but it’s definitely still there and it makes me feel very ashamed.

It’s not about me wanting to have sex with pregnant women. I get just as aroused when I see mpreg, which is crazy to type out. As a kid and as a teen, I used to stuff pillows under my shirt and stare at myself in the mirror and I remember it used to be my favourite way to masturbate. I loved reading romance stories about accidental pregnancies and I used to project myself onto the pregnant character and imagine what it would be like.

It’s very confusing, because I am in fact straight, despite the fact that I have been turned on seeing pregnant women. I think I was just projecting myself onto them though, because again, it was never about sex.

I’ve heavily suppressed this part of me as I got older and I never told any of my boyfriends out of fear of being judged. I have no desire to actually get pregnant as of right now, obviously, but I have this somewhat irrational fear that once I do get pregnant, I’ll get addicted to the feeling and it’ll negatively impact my future relationship.

I know that this fear is somewhat silly, but it’s definitely one I worry about.

I also worry that having this kink means that I’m not actually straight, though that’s mostly because I’ll feel like I’ve been lying to my partners all of this time. I don’t particularly want to date or have sex with women either though, so it also feels dishonest to call myself bi.

I need to know if there’s anyone out there that can relate to this. I feel like such a pervert.

31 Comments
2024/06/19
12:53 UTC

0

Could I be raped and don’t remember?

Could I be raped?

I drink too much alcohol last weekend and I got blackout. I had argument with my boyfriend and friends and I took taxi alone to home. I remember the taxi driver hit on me, but at the end he took me home. Next day I felt ashamed. I don’t remember many things. I think I slept in the taxi too. The way home normally takes 20 minutes and it took 40 minutes. I think it’s because I slept in the taxi and the taxi driver hit on me. I think nothing happened but I am not sure. Could I be raped and I don’t remember?

2 Comments
2024/06/19
11:36 UTC

6

I let out pee when I finger myself. Is that supposed to happen?

In case it changes anything: I'm 19 and haven't had a sexual encounter with anyone yet. I also feel the need to mention that I wroteanother postbefore about having some issues with peeing? Not sure if that’s connected.

When I finger (or just penetrate, really, but it's especially worse when fingering) myself, I always end up letting out pee and it's making me really conscious. Peeing before fingering myself doesn't help either and when I decide to stop even if only 5 minutes has passed, I end up wanting to pee again. It's not a whole stream or anything intense but small trickles that go out every time I press down.

It feels and SMELLS like pee and sometimes, looks like pee too so I’m pretty certain. I've read on some threads that you should just keep going because it's not really pee (or at least not entirely??) but I just can't bring myself to do it because I get so scared that I end up peeing everywhere.

Is this suppose to be normal?? Do most people experience that?? If not, does anyone have any suggestions on what can be done?

13 Comments
2024/06/19
11:32 UTC

5

Unable to get wet

23f

I used to have no issues with getting wet as a teenager. At least not that I remember. I got pregnant at 18, had my child at 19. I couldn’t have sex while I was pregnant because it was painful. Breastfed for 10 months after and by the time I stopped breastfeeding I A) had lost all emotional connection to my partner B) had a morena IUD placed.

Since then I’ve had a long term relationship with someone I am romantically and sexually attracted to but I can never get wet and stay wet. We always have to use lube or saliva to keep it going otherwise it causes us both pain.

Side notes, I also suffer from adult female acne and have been put on spironolactone to lower testosterone levels which is working wonderfully. I had wetness issues before I went on this medication anyway. Also, during sex my cervix is very sensitive and can often be too painful.

I don’t know what my body is like outside of pregnancy, breastfeeding, or birth control hormones. Is my IUD causing dryness? I don’t really know what to do

Added: I have had my hormones checked in the last couple months and everything has been totally normal.

I’m also scared to remove my IUD for obvious pregnancy fears AND fear of my acne returning

3 Comments
2024/06/19
03:02 UTC

11

how do you know if you are about to orgasm?

i know for each woman it’s different, and i’m just curious to see what it is like for other women. for me, i can feel it in my feet and my feet tingle and feel cold and my clit also starts feeling super cold, but that’s only when i masturbate with a vibrator. during sex or with a partner, it’s just like a build up and a kind of mild release. with myself it is almost always more intense (not always, my partner has started to get better). what’s it like for you guys?

5 Comments
2024/06/19
01:19 UTC

25

Masturbation before marriage vs after getting married

Since being married for 3 years now, I feel my husband and I have both opened up a lot more about our masturbation habits. After talking with him about how often we masturbated before and after marriage, made me very curious how others were? What's "normal" for lds culture.

My husband and I both seem to have had the same sex drive. We both masturbated a bunch in high school, and then a lot more when we were dating, almost every night we separated. We hadn't talked about this until after we got married though, had no idea we were both going home and taking care of ourselves after seeing each other.

Now that were married, as long as we're having sex 3-4 times a week, I'm usually taking care of myself the same amount again that week. Just when he's at work or school and I get the urge. I haven't asked him his own habits since being married so I honestly have no idea how often he does it since being married. When we have sex he doesn't play with himself though during forplay and I'm the one who does that. I do think he might be bashful about it, not sure. But would love to hear others experiences on it.

Also not sure if it changes things or not but we waited to have sex on our wedding night.

3 Comments
2024/06/18
22:00 UTC

5

Was this consent violation and abuse?

Trigger warning

He was for sure verbally abusive but the breakup started with me feeling physically violated. The breakup was years ago so I'm fine now. But for 2 years I couldn't stop reliving the feeling of violation and crying daily.

But he swore even on his parents (I asked him to swear on something important) that he hadn't meant to hurt me, that I was hurt and angry for nothing, that I hadn't told him I didn't want things (but I HAD told him) and that he never intended to hurt me.

He said "no I did not take pleasure from hurting you" when I told him at the end that that is what it felt like.

His actions were the complete opposite but his words SOUNDED SO SINCERE. He also said, "I'd never do that. I don't even imagine myself doing that." How could he lie so much???

Usually he was kind gentle etc. He even asked me before holding hands the first time. I thought, wow what a gentleman. So I didn't know what to think later.

We were both almost 23 years old. I had no experience dating.

Once during sex he put his hand around my neck without asking. It wasn't tight, it wasn't choking or anything. It was sudden and firm but NOT pressing in. But it caught me by surprise and I didn't know what to do.

Later I texted him that I wasn't ok with neck grabbing, he said he didn't understand what neck grabbing meant (what else could it mean????), so I said we'll talk in person, then when we met he said a quick "uh sorry for grabbing your neck" so I brushed it off.

We were outside alone just kissing, he started zipping down my top and I zipped it up. But I didn't reject him kissing me. A few minutes later he started unzipping it again, i zipped up immediately.

It happened at least one other time a few minutes later.

Then he said, "you're cold?" I said yes. And he stopped.

But why wasn't non-verbal communication enough?? I showed him I didn't want to take it off.

He'd been really kind apart from that up til then.

Later that evening, on a blanket outside, I told him "i don't want to do too much cause we're outside". Up til then we'd never even taken any clothes off. We kissed and a while later he asked me to JUST take off my jacket ONLY. It was a bit of an uncomfortable jacket so I took it off cause it felt better lying down.

But a few min later he unzipped my top again and started to pull down my undershirt and exposed my chest. I pulled it up.

It was still cold out and I had already shown i wasn't ok with taking it off. So why try again? We had been making out lying down and I squeezed his butt so was it my fault, did I give mixed signals?

Then he suddenly forcefully pinned down both my arms, I pulled hard and got one of my hands free but he pinned it AGAIN.

After a few seconds of showing that obviously I wasn't ok with this, I told him we should stop and he stopped.

So i ignored this incident and thought maybe it was just "flirting". That's what he said it was. But did i have to repeat myself that much?

Still sometimes he did things like: pinching my skin even though I told him each time to stop. I said, "Don't pinch."

Pinching NOT to the point of hurting but almost. It was very very uncomfortable and weird.

I don't know why he did this but he'd sometimes pinch my skin for no reason in bed. Later he said "it's just a cute thing couples do."

Once we kissed and he took a thin strand of my hair and pulled it REALLY hard. I had to push his hand away. Wtf??? this one really confused me and hurt.

Then a few minutes later he ran his fingers through the back of my hair and then closed his hand so he was grabbing my hair, but it wasn't tight or pulling.

Even though I put my hand on his to indicate that I didn't want that, he kept it there. Only after i took my hand away seconds later, he took his away, and went on as if nothing had happened. He was thoughtful the rest of the time so I didn't know what to think.

Once I told him about 5 times to take his hand away. "Don't do that. Stop. I said don't do that. Stop that." And he ignored and laughed. Yes it was something I had previously been ok with, but he was doing it too much and I did tell him to stop.

Even small things like we'd be holding hands normally and suddenly he started gripping my hand tight so I had to pull hard to get it free. He held on tight even to my fingers for a second and I pulled them.

I was in disbelief that it happened, it was only about 5 seconds, it was a small thing so my reaction was denial, to try to move on and ignore, and hold hands again. This time it was normal hand holding. He said it was just cause his hand was cold and numb. ???????

Putting both arms around me suddenly and quite tight so I was restricted from moving. I would freeze and didn't know how to react for a second. I thought maybe it was a playful tight hug. But it was sudden and felt weird so i had to shake him off.

He never communicated with me beforehand what he wanted.

Did he think i was joking? I confronted him. He said "i never took your boundaries as a joke. Omg...I feel like a fool. I'm embarrassed. I wasn't trying to harm you." He said it was just playful.

He said, "You didn't tell me you didn't want rough stuff. At least i don't remember."

Also one time he scratched me when fingering me. It made me jump and it hurt. He said it was an accident.

Then when we broke up he was telling me stuff like "no f--ing way will i apologise for anything. Deal with it." And a few weeks before he'd said "it hurts me in my chest to think i hurt you. I feel like an asshole. I feel so embarrassed. I feel like a fool. I didn't mean to hurt you."

Then later "i need someone strong. I believe in equality in a relationship so i can't be with someone less dominant. You're soft. I can't be with someone fragile."

For context, he did lie even about having been in actual love with me to get me to be fwb after the breakup. I said no. He later denied he ever wrote "i was also in love with you" and said he never said that and he never felt that. I had unfortunately deleted the chat to move on but i remember clearly he wrote that and i'd written a looong reply back.

He blamed me for him forgetting my birthday though i'd reminded him a MONTH and also TWO DAYS before. He gave me the silent treatment when i said i felt upset. He said I should've reminded him also on the day if I felt lonely. Then the next day he said he'd make it up to me. He just got a cheap necklace, cheap candle then on second thoughts ordered sushi after sex. The fuck. I was so starved for attention so I was happy with crumbs. He didn't even give me the gift as soon as we met. It was after sex.

15 Comments
2024/06/18
21:41 UTC

33

I want to get better at sex but I need ideas

I (34f) have been seeing my BF (42m) for a few months, and he has a lot more sexual experience than I have. I overall feel pretty self-conscious a lot of the time and have a lot of anxiety around sex in general. This is not a long-term relationship but we both see it as an enjoyable outlet in the meantime and we are pretty good friends.

Last night after sex I asked him if there is anything I do that he really enjoys. I phrased it that way because I didn't want an assessment of my performance (which I knew was still not going to be high but was somewhat improving) but rather that he could highlight that maybe he likes when I kiss his neck or something and I could do that more and build on that. Instead he just said that things had improved over time, but "you don't do a huge variety of things, kind of just grind, but it gets the job done. All that's going to matter to me is if you're doing what turns you on and that turns me on."

I'd really like for him to tell me some things to try doing, and then I can see if I like it. As of now, I guess I don't know what else to do other than the grinding he seems unimpressed with.

What are things people do? I don't want to watch porn. And I don't have any real ideas of my own, because I have very limited experience.

For guys, what is something a woman could do that you enjoy? For women, what is something you do that a guy has enjoyed?

21 Comments
2024/06/18
20:33 UTC

16

How to have the best orgasms consistently?

I love to masturbate and I’m in my early 40’s, definitely at my sexual peak. I remember years ago when I first got my Hitachi magic wand, I could reliably have a huge, perfect, mind blowing and satisfying orgasm every time. The kind of orgasm that feels like being on a drug. The kind that makes me lie back and just feel the pleasure all through myself for a minute straight. I have only ever had these from masturbation, never from sex.

Since then, I’ve gotten into masturbation more, have tried a lot of different toys, and realized there are a lot of different types of orgasms that I can have, but masturbation is not as reliable and a lot of the time I can’t cum. On a positive note, I feel like I do understand my sexuality and turn ons more. But I have performance issues, get all in my head about not cumming, wind up frustrated.

I’ve struggled to find any similar experiences to mine and wonder if other females know what I’m on about. I think I’m most able to cum like that when I have been masturbating less often and I wonder if I should try to figure out how to do a sort of self induced chastity. Less is more? I remember having these orgasms most consistently when I only played with myself 1 or 2 times per week (I’ve been masturbating daily for a couple of years now and I feel it may have messed me up).

13 Comments
2024/06/18
17:11 UTC

9

Is my cervix too low?

This is so embarrassing but I've been searching and no one seems to have the same worry I have, I (18F) am a virgin, I've just recently started fingering myself because I was tired of not being able to go further with my past partners. My nails are long so I can only experiment with my pinky and my index (nails broke lol) I can get my index just fine but I can feel my cervix very low?? I reach the base of the finger but that's it, penises are longer, so I'm just wondering if this is a problem? Will I be able to have sex properly? How can my vagina be just a finger deep...

I appreciate all advice!

11 Comments
2024/06/18
04:23 UTC

14

I can’t orgasm no matter what I do

When I do anything sexual (solo time, sex, toys, etc), it feels decently good and I usually get a feeling that I don’t think could be explained as a climax, but after that feeling happens it doesn’t feel good anymore, nothing comes out. Like I hit a wall, where even if I keep trying to go it just doesn’t feel like anything and it gets sensitive. It’s so odd, because I know it’s not me having an orgasm because it’s not a full body sensation but it really sucks because my current boyfriend wants to make me cum so bad, but I have never. I don’t even know if I’m capable, and not only that but sometimes sex makes me numb down there even though my boyfriend isn’t small I can’t feel it as much as other times.

6 Comments
2024/06/18
01:18 UTC

31

How to break things off after a bumble date didn’t ask consent?

Update: I texted him and told him the choking wasn’t ok and that I didn’t want to see him anymore. We talked a little bit about why that wasn’t ok - I wanted to say enough to establish that he needs to ask explicit consent for something like that in the future with other people. He acted like he took it to heart but who knows. Thank you all for your helpful comments ❤️

So I (22f) went out with this guy (26m) the other night and for a number of reasons I didn’t find him particularly attractive as a potential romantic or sexual partner. We got drinks and made out a bit after. While we were making out, he first grabbed the back of my neck (testing the waters?) then eventually my throat. I hate, hate being choked. I find it so demeaning and objectifying. I didn’t say anything at the time because I really didn’t know how to. I have a history of trauma, mostly not sexual, and I’ve always been one to freeze instead of fight or flight.

So now he’s continuing to text me, telling me he really likes me, and I don’t know how to tell him that was so much of a breach of respect that I couldn’t possibly fathom having a relationship with him.

He knows the building where I live and he googled my damn linkedin (you can see profile views). That’s the only public info I have online. But I’m really freaked out he’ll do something if I tell him I’m not interested. I don’t actually logically think he will but I can see him becoming strangely obsessed with me and it’s really really off putting. Any advice is appreciated.

16 Comments
2024/06/18
00:32 UTC

20

Is it normal to not be aroused by naked men?

I struggle with OCD and this thought has been one that my brain as latched onto as of late. Basically, when I see an attractive shirtless guy or a naked guy, I don't get aroused by looking at them. Even in real life, my partners getting undressed won't immediately arouse me. That said, I do have a great time once he starts touching me and we start doing foreplay, I do start to feel stuff and I have a really great time and I do have sexual fantasies. Those fantasies don't physically make me wet but I do definitely find them mentally arousing because I love indulging in them and they make me giddy. I also like looking at their arms and their hands and I love staring at them.

My issue is that as far as physical arousal goes - as in I'm actually wet - I can only feel it when I'm actively being stimulated in the moment. Even then though, I struggle to actually get wet, even if my mind is flooding with thoughts about touching and pleasing and being pleased by my partner. I'll feel wetness, but no actual throbbing, like I do when I'm alone with my vibrator. Could this be an anxiety response? Maybe I'm putting too much pressure on myself to feel the right things in the moment when I'm with someone? I definitely experience the mental arousal aspect, but the fact that it rarely translates physically stresses me out.

22 Comments
2024/06/17
19:02 UTC

8

porn addiction

my bf struggles to ‘get it up’ sometimes. we have established its not a problem with our sexual chemistry or attraction to one another but more likely because of his porn addiction prior to being with me. i am his first sexual partner and i haven’t been with anyone who has struggled to get hard before. we’ve been together for 6 months now and there have been improvements (he couldn’t cum with me at all in the beginning and now its around a 50/50 chance it’ll happen). im assuming it can only get better with time but i feel bad when i’m the only one getting satisfied and want to know if there is anything else i/we can do. so, i am curious whether anyone been in a similar situation? and any advice? thank you <3

4 Comments
2024/06/17
09:42 UTC

10

Rubbed vagina/labia minora raw …

It feels like it’s pulsing and hot and swollen.. I got too rough while on the phone with my husband.. I used a silicone toy and I just went for it without lubrication… so it’s my fault but how do I fix this? Or help myself? It feels not so great.

12 Comments
2024/06/17
04:48 UTC

2

Have you ever experienced internal orgasms with casual encounters/relationships?

Or have they only been in relationships with strong emotional connection?

8 Comments
2024/06/16
23:07 UTC

20

Having trouble vocalizing what I want in the bedroom

I was married for 14 years and my (almost) ex husband was my first real sexual partner (I fooled around with guys here and there but first PIV sexual experience).

I’m now exploring with other guys, and I had really great sex with one guy about a week ago who I think might become a regular FWB. The only thing that made me slightly uncomfortable was he kept asking what I wanted - which position do you want/which feels best for you, what should I change to make you cum (as he’s going down on me), what do you want me to do next, etc. The only problem is my husband and I had a VERY lackluster sex life, with verrrry long periods of a dead bedroom (by his choice), so I don’t even know what I want. All I know is everything felt great, and I didn’t have anything I wanted him to change, but feel awkward being like “whatever position you want! The oral is great - keep it the same!” the whole time. I masturbate a lot so it’s not a matter of not knowing my body, but just verbalizing it during sex, and knowing what I want a man to do, is what seems to be my issue.

My husband (I learned in the later years) had a porn issue so he literally was dead behind the eyes and didn’t say one word the entire time we were having sex, and pretty much only cared about his own pleasure, so this is all very new to me. I think I feel even more embarrassed/uncomfortable with my inability to vocalize what I want because I’m no young woman (38 yo) so I feel like I should know what I want a little more at this point.

I guess I could also broach this same conversation with him but I feel like I can’t adequately convey what I’m feeling without getting into the nitty gritty of my shitty marriage, which isn’t something I would love to get into at this stage of the game, especially considering we had an at length conversation about how neither of us are looking for anything more than dinner/drinks and casual sex. If I start trauma dumping on him it may seem like I’m looking for more of an emotional connection.

I know obviously no one can tell me what I want in the bedroom so I can vocalize it, but any tips for me for getting better at this so I don’t just seem like an agreeable starfish the whole time?

6 Comments
2024/06/16
20:01 UTC

13

squirt

i started squirting (out of nowhere) more than a year ago and have been squirting everytime me and my partner have intercourse. however, it started smelling very bad all of a sudden and we can’t figure out why. it used to never have a smell and now it’s just so prominent. nothing changed - not my diet, nothing. we can’t figure out. does anyone have any advice?

7 Comments
2024/06/16
17:53 UTC

77

Thoughts about small penis

Hi gals, I (33F) recently had an amazing experience with a guy with a small instrument, and I was chatting with my sister (34F) about sex and stuffs, turns out that she’s a size queen and I’m not. Of course everyone is different. So then I was wondering, what women generally think about dick sizes? It is really that important? Can you tell about your personal preferences? Would you turned down a small or micro guy? Any other thought?

[edit] girls, thank you for your answers. We often see many negative comments/jokes stereotypes about dick sizes, since people are so different, I wanted to get a sense about the reality of the world we live in, and y’all made it more brighter! Thank you!

75 Comments
2024/06/16
04:07 UTC

32

NOT LISTENING

I’m having sex with this guy I’ve dated for a while but we just started having sex. I think he’s bad in bed. It’s like he’s trying to have porn sex with me. When I tell him just like that or that I’m close he decides it’s time to go harder and faster. It completely fucks me up and then after a couple times it just kind of isn’t as wet any more. It’s so frustrating. Like LISTEN TO ME. And he’s acting like he’s very experienced(I’m not) so idk if it’s like a power thing? But you can’t make me believe other women liked these things. If we do have sex again I’m going to try and really get him to hear me like being firm bc I haven’t even had an orgasm yet. I’m getting fed up 😭 even when he eats me out it’s like he’s not on the correct spot. And when he finally got there this last time he just wasn’t listening. And he was licking it too hard. Thanks for listening to my rant.

13 Comments
2024/06/15
22:32 UTC

37

My odour down there and late periods

I’m not too sure what’s happening with my body of late but hopefully some of y’all will have some insight.

As the title says, lately (let’s say roughly the past week) I’ve noticed a weird vaginal odour. This isn’t when I’m peeing, this is the smell of when I pull down my underwear before anything happens. It’s not great, more fishy and something I’ve never had before.

The second thing is my period is late once again - so far it’s three days. Last month it was going on 8, before then my period was very regular.

Things that have changed recently -

  • I’ve been walking home from work every night. This is very casual and takes about an hour to get from Work to home.
  • I’ve been on a diet for a week, this involves consuming green tea 2x a day and eating a lot of mandarins (obviously more food is involved aswell)
  • in the past two months I’ve lost a loved one to suicide. I know my feelings have been all over the place with this.
  • I’ve been stressed about money issues
  • I haven’t been sexually active in 3 years

Not sure if any of that is a factor but just giving more context.

What is going on with my body?? And please if you don’t have anything nice to say or add just please don’t comment. I’m honestly not up for it. Thank you

28 Comments
2024/06/15
10:50 UTC

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