We're here promoting bodily autonomy, sexual freedom, radical consent, queer liberation, body positivity, and the destruction of patriarchy.
Sister Subreddits:
We recognize that the types of speech that dominate our space and the composition of people who occupy here are reflective of our values; there are no coincidences. Therefore, it is our responsibility to create a safer space for marginalized identities including people with disabilities, people of color, LGBTQIA (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender/transsexual, queer, intersex, and asexual) people, women, and class oppressed people.
We have no tolerance for oppressive attitudes, and expect accountability for any oppressive behavior. That is, any language or action that upholds ableism, white supremacy or peripheral racism, cissexism, heterosexism, misogyny, and/or classism. This includes slut shaming, victim blaming, body policing, etc. All members are encouraged to hold themselves and each other to our these community norms and to report any offenders to the group admins.
/r/SexPositive
So me and my GF have been together for coming up on 2 years now and she said to me two nights ago that she would like to try watching porn together.
Here comes the issue. We are both black but she's made it pretty clear she isn't a fan of white peoples. Idk if it's because of growing up in a predominantly white environment or if there's just been a lot of bad experiences/ negativity from peers but the distain is there.
On my side, I actually think white people are nice. I didn't have a ton of bad experiences or anything like that, on the contrary I've found that a lot of white people were very welcoming to me as a kid and that feeling of not being on edge just transferred to adulthood. My therapist reminds me of my 8th grade English teacher (white / Albanian), my previous boss reminded me of my first workplace crush (don't tell HR that's why I chose that location).
Anyway, I typically enjoy PAWG porn or actresses of the lighter variety (minus a few exceptions). I think this would probably cause some issues (whether it's going to be her feeling some type of angry/insecure or just unable to get off I don't know). I asked her to pick something and we kind of just got potato's the idea till we gave up.
The other concern I have is she's been opening up to me about POSSIBLY adding a second girl. I'm 99% certain it's implied she means a black woman but personally if I were to add a third it would probably be a white or Asian person.
Is there a good way to talk about this or do I just kind come out and say it?
Hi I’m a cheerleader, and yes, I’ve hooked up with some of the players. It’s not always what people expect, but it definitely keeps life interesting.
I started a sub specifically for women who love women to discuss polyamory (and other flavors of ENM).
It's a sex positive space intended to prioritize the voices of women. Its trans, queer, and bi/pan friendly.
Its not an R4R space.
Stop by if this appeals to you. It's just getting started, but I think the demand is there.
r/sapphicpoly
For me, it's absolutely crucial to know that my partner is sexually satisfied with me.
My girlfriend and I seem to have great chemistry in bed. She shows a lot of signs of pleasure during our intimate moments, but outside of those moments, she has never given me any feedback or compliments—zero.
This makes me feel anxious and insecure because I worry she might be faking some reactions in the moment just to make me happy.
But then I think: if her goal were just to keep me happy and relaxed, wouldn’t she also give me (even fake) compliments afterward? I mean, it wouldn’t make sense to fake an orgasm so convincingly during sex and then not be able to fake satisfaction with words later, right?
When I say “convincingly,” I mean some of her reactions feel incredibly spontaneous—for example, strong contractions that seem to push me out of her.
I just can’t figure this out. I rely a lot on feedback and verbal communication in general. Hearing her say positive things about our relationship or about me is one of the things that makes me happiest—but when it comes to sex, she doesn’t say anything at all.
I’ve tried to bring this up before, but when I do, she becomes distant and gives very short, cold responses, almost as if my doubts annoy her.
(For context, I’ve always been very attentive during sex, asking her what she likes and making sure I put in effort with foreplay and other things.)
Not sure if this is the subreddit for it but I've always wanted to learn how to twerk and I just could never get the motion down. I really want to get it down for my bf but I just don't know how so any advice or pointing me in the right direction would be appreciated.
But I’m glad my boyfriend can’t say he’s never made his girlfriend cum :)
Laying next to him after he finished giving me cunnilingus and I’m just smiling so wide lol. I used to have a bf who went down on me all the time even when I wasn’t sure I wanted it, but that can’t compare to fully consenting when it feels right and special, and helping him learn how to use his tongue on me is really cute and sweet. So many girls trash on guys for not knowing how to eat them out, all it takes is a little patience and communication.
I’d love to hear women who ENJOY wearing thongs, either for comfort or because it makes them feel sexy.
I have a few lacy pairs from VS which my guy friend likes me to wear. It drives him crazy.
Problem is they’re kind of uncomfortable. He especially likes to have sex with me while they’re still on, just pulled to the side. I just feel awkward like my butt crack is being flossed, so I prefer to take them off and be naked.
I’ve also read about women who wear them around town, at the gym, etc, which is unfathomable to me.
I wonder how I can come around to enjoy wearing them more. Is it a matter of confidence? Choosing more comfortable brands? Please share your thoughts 🙏
So I see a lot of people talking about how women get shamed for their sexuality (and I'm sure that's true). but what I don't see a lot of people talking about, is men being shamed for their sexuality too. to give some examples, men are always told that they are just pigs. "men are just dirty disgusting pigs, all they care about is sex blah blah blah" It makes me as a man feel ashamed of my sexuality, and that my sexuality is not welcome anywhere. if teenagers want to insult a teenage boy, they call him a masturbator. "You jerk off in your free time!" I saw on this 'best of 2018 porn' or something, one of the female hosts said "they look so ugly doing it", referring to videos of men masturbating. on dating apps when women talk about sex on their profiles, I feel like 90% of the time it's to say something negative about it. I've seen several women put this meme "my favourite sex position is you in therapy". Again, it makes me feel like my sexuality is simply not welcome, and it's seen as gross.
This is something I feel very strongly about. It's my own personal elephant in the room. So I really feel like I want to express it. I don't feel a lot of people are talking about this. I do feel like I'm the lone voice saying this. I'm sure a lot of people here (and elsewhere) will disagree with me. I may get attacked also. if you feel the need to attack me, please ask yourself why. I am not trying to attack anyone here. I am not trying to diminish women's problems in any way. So please, let's not make this into a competition about who suffers more. I'm not trying to start a competition or a fight. I'm just trying to share my perspective: that men get shamed for their sexuality too.
I want us all to get along and I try to keep an open mind. I may not see as much cases of women geting sex shamed, but it doesn't mean it doesn't happen. it could be my own biased lenses that I see the world through, as a man. I don't know what it's like to be a woman, so I try to keep an open mind. I would love to find a community where my sexuality can be loved, or at the very least accepted. but I feel like it's difficult to find such a community. I wish I felt more welcome in the sex positive community.
So just curious, as it's a constant discussion with the hubs. He loves putting me and seeing me in, let's say, situations. Clubs, bondage, with toys, etc. He loves humiliating me, and I, luckily, love being humiliated and I am an exhibitionist at my core. Is this sub/dom? I love to serve him in this sense - as it really turns him on but I am just naturally into all of this as well. I really do feel like I belong to him and there is literally no one else in my fantasies but him when it comes to someone in charge. We always discuss if we are sub/dom as we're pretty equal in all other parts of our lives. I feel it is... kind of.. but would love to discuss.
28 year old non binary here. Grew up around purity culture, lack of sex education, shaming of sex in general and idolisation of arranged(read: forced) marriages and "the one" romantic ideals. These things have always annoyed me ever since I was a teenager. But I managed to find people who were more open minded, relaxed, sex postive in a healthy way, not in an objectification way.
Over time, I've met more and more people like that and when I went to a bigger city for college, I was relieved to be around so many cool people who had the live and let live attitude. Men, women, and people of all genders.
About a year or so ago, I got back to reading and writing fanfiction, as I had free time and I thought, hey, I should write the smut that I think should be more of. Yes, I'm an ao3 writer.
For writing advice and reccomendations, I followed a lot of authors on social media. Needless to say, the algorithm soon started reccomending stuff. On almost every video of a woman talking about smut, there's always someone slut-shaming and calling women "porn addicts." And then there's the authors who promote their books as "it doesn't have dirty filthy sex and is pure and clean."
For some reason, these things make me boil at my core and makes me want to throw my phone on the wall. I really needed to vent here and wanted some advice on taking a chill pill.
Thanks.
I'm doing a bit of writing and I'm looking for a point of reference. Has there ever been a society that could be described as sex-positive? Not like, a small commune or anything, I'm talking bare minimum the size of a town.
Hello, my bf and I have been experimenting with anal play for quite some time now. I find it extremely arousing and he likes it as well so it's kind of our fantasy. I have a normal sized but plug that I like to wear it when we have sex and recently bought a slightly bigger one to try it out. I tried it out on my own the first time but I just could not fit it in... I don't know why, maybe I was just not relaxed enough but at one point I felt a bit of pain so I stopped. Second time he tried it on me and he had no problems sliding it in... maybe because we took our time and he had played with his finger before and we also used a lot of lube. This was also the first time we had full on anal sex meaning the first time he was able to enter fully and very deep and I enjoyed it a lot. Other times he was only able to enter just a little bit or maybe only once and then I would need him to pull out because I felt I was not relaxed enough and started to feel pain. Does anyone else feel like you need a full 30 min at least for stretching and feeling relaxed before anal sex? Also, can someone share some advice on anal cleansing? It this a rule of thumb before anal sex? I haven't had any issues until now with this but my bf would like to cum inside of me while doing anal and I kind of want him to as well and I don't know if a cleanse is necessary before that. Thank you for your advice!😊
Hi there
I'm an exhibitionist female, and I'm wondering if there is a club you can recommend where I can be completely naked. I would go with my partner, who would likely wear a really expensive suit - but I'd only want boots to protect my feet. Completely naked otherwise. Assume it's not too big of a deal, so I'm looking for good club recommendations where this would be accepted or even appreciated. Have not done it before, so perhaps this is pretty vanilla for many but not for me. We're open to travelling within Europe. Nothing sleezy, and we'd love classy and positive. Thank you!
does anybody have a link to the ethical gangbang forum that helped organize aella’s birthday gangbang? i was explaining it to an inquiring friend but couldn’t find the webpage
Can we normalized sucking your friends dick when they are horny?😭 I know it's impossible but why not it would just be better. Less hate, more orgasm, more people sucking eachother off. Like when you are just alone with a group of friends and don't know what to do you could just say "I'm kinda horny" and then ask for someone to help you and that would be so cool. You don't even need to be gay (I'm bi) but like, helping a friend it's cool and if everyone had an open mentality I think no one would find it so embarrassing
Wanted to see if anyone else gave or received any sex toys for Christmas! I personally bought a lot for friends and others and was happy to receive a few dildos, vibrators and anal toys.
I (m36) am married to (f33). We have a kid and want more. We are both introvert and have insecurities regarding our bodies and sexuality. For years she now and then dropped a comment that she would like to have sex with a girl but in last time it got much more frequent.
I don’t know how to deal with these comments. Today I answered that if she is serious we can look for a girl to join us and she was like “yeah sure, we an obese couple are looking for you sexy thin girl to join us in bed” (In a sarcastic voice). I could do good with 30kg less but she isn’t obese at all. I almost can see her abs.
However, her answer wasn’t “nah, just kidding”. I don’t really know if she really wants this. I don’t know how to talk with her about this and if to talk at all. Our sexual life had his ups and downs the last years.
My girlfriend (25f) and I (30f) are wanting to have a threesome. We have someone in mind who is eager and willing to join us but we want to make sure we go about it so ensure everyone is comfortable. What are some boundaries or things to consider when we go into it?
Currently we plan on all meeting at a bar having a drink or two to discuss boundaries and see if we all have chemistry.
To start off, (m31) I have been working on myself for about 4 years now, and at this point in my life I'm starting to accept my sexual side, I think over the years of trauma growing up and porn had a big effect on me. Both good and bad I guess you could say came out of it. It's both a blessing and curse lol, I'm a highly sexual person and in my relationship it helps alot you know especially with my SO Making sure she is taken care of sexually, the other thing is my hyper sexual mind, it's like all my mind wants is sexual stimulation. Porn is cool personally I like the older stuff back when I was in highschool and even before that (2005- 2013) I like some modern stuff but it seems way to fake to me now (even though porn is mostly fake lol) I get into moments where Im just jacking off to porn and getting into some freaky stuff that I wasn't into before but it was really hot lol. It later on became a problem just draining myself and when it came down to sex with my SO I didn't have anymore drive and erection quality was lacking I was feeling like shit and it was embarrassing. I'm Learning more about sexual energy plus stuff like nofap/ semen retention. I'm not going full monk or what ever, I'm very sexual and sex is a important to me and my relationship, I am learning how to do more with my sexual energy and more about sex and upping my sexual skills, also learning more how to use and create using my sexual energy.
I got alot to learn and I'm along for the rid
So I have BV issues and need my girlfriend to wear a condom. But she can only rarely cum with one on. Apparently it's numb?
Are there condoms that don't have as much of this numbing feeling?
We're using "unique pull".
I prefer non latex which seems to be the issue in finding a condom to fix this issue. Absolutely none with spermicidal lube!
(She's very sweet. She's never pressured me to let her not wear one. I simply think it's not fair that she doesn't get a release and I do)
I’d love to hear some success stories of women with high sex drives finding committed relationships. I was telling a guy friend that it’s hard for me to find relationships and he said it’s because I’m slutty. Women who put out don’t get relationships. I’ve tried every technique and next I will try hormonal therapy because I’m becoming frustrated in more ways than one. I feel like I can’t be myself on dates because I’m trying to guard myself from having sex. And I don’t want to date people I’m not attracted to just to get a relationship.
Hi all, I’ve been with my girlfriend for over a year now and wanted to know how I can increase the pleasure in bed with her. For example, do you guys have a favorite sentence that turns you on and make you cum faster? I know I’ve been doing great and that it is enough for her, but I’m trying to improve and increase the amount of pleasure that she can have.
Thanks a lot for your help!
Is there an app that partners you with optimum yucks & yums? Like, here are 12 100% sexual matches, and 36 90% sexual matches- and if they want to reach out, they can. Things like, give to receive ratio, frequency, shared kinks, ass or tits, anal, amount of hair…that kind of stuff? I’ve never really seen anyone do it for real, and make it like tender reaching out, but based on shared stats.
I have no one to share this accomplishment with so it's going here.
I've been in a monogamous long distance relationship for 5 years and he has been my only partner. I can't do birth control so we only use condoms.
For the few times we've met up, we've used trojan latex condoms. The sex is alright enough, usually us doing oral to finish up since I always get too dry to continue much, not even lube did anything. I thought maybe it was something wrong with me but he's always been sweet and understanding.
Few nights ago things get spicy but I am just, in agony the entire time. It wasn't fair, I was into it very much and suddenly I'm not?? Instantly? There's no way I'm at fault here. He handled it really well and I love him all the more for it, stopping immediately and calming me down while I just cried from the stress and pain. No damage or bleeding to me, no disappointment from him.
The simple fix was just using SKYN condoms. That was it. For the first time I was into it the entire time, I was never in pain, and after cleanup I'm not in pain. It's so nice. I didn't know it could be like this. I hope this continues.
Tldr: Don't use latex condoms.
First off, apologies if this is more an educational post. I guess it's... a request for education? IDK. I'm nervous af even admitting to this, but I won't get anywhere without spilling my guts at some point. I'm kinda slowly but surely working through some things that I've bottled up for some time, and of course you bottle things up for a reason. I've self-identified as a feminist for... going on 13 years now, if my math is right. And a sex-positive one at that. That said, I've got some internalized negativity, so trying to get to this in-house has been a failure.
So that preamble out of the way - I like hentai. I like anime, I like porn, it's the Reese's cup of the whole thing. That said, anyone who's dipped their toe in the stuff will learn that hentai is... shall we say less than concerned with consent (sometimes even the age thereof, and fuck any sicko who's into that). And like any decent person, I despise sexual assault. To be clear, I don't enjoy stuff for it's non-consensual nature, but there's stuff I've enjoyed despite it.
On the one hand, obviously, one could say "Well, no one's actually getting hurt". And that's fine I suppose, but on the flip side you could just as well argue that point for a lot of harmful media. And with hentai it's specifically eroticizing it, it actively encourages you to fap to it.
IDK, I'm constantly kind of tumbling here and figured a third-party would be good.
Asking for a friend lol. I'm interested in a loft bed that could also act as support for a sex sling and/or be used in suspension rope play in some capacity. Does anyone know if such a thing or exists? Any loft beds out there that anyone has used for similar purposes?
I have a sling elsewhere in the house and have been told a children's swing set can be good for rope suspension play. But I'm also curious if there's a way to make this work with a loft bed. For legitimate reasons. Thanks.