My wife recently shared her fantasy roleplay of being home alone, having someone force their way in, having her initially try to fight them off before giving in and succumbing to their demands and turning into their fuck toy.

She was embarrassed about it at first and kinda said it in passing but has now brought it up several times. I want to make her roleplay a reality and I want to make it as good for her as I can. How can I approach this to make it genuine, fun, and sexy for her without it being awkward, embarrassing or clunky?

I've got a Fort Troff sling that just skirts under the 50lbs limit to check a bag, so I regularly take it with me to conventions and events. Love it. That said, I'm never quite sure what to tell the airline staff when then ask "What's in this?!" It is, after all, a giant duffle bag full of clanging metal pipes that's very heavy and bulky. My default answer has been "Modular Furniture", which is...a ridiculous answer, but the closest thing I've come up with.

I'm certainly not embarrassed about traveling with it, but I also recognize that airline staff have to deal with a lot of BS on the daily and, if they're not also in the scene, might be weirded out by it, so I'm not trying to mess up their day bragging about traveling with my sex furniture. 😂

Anyone else have experience with this? How do you answer?

I’ve been curious about going to in-person community meetups, but I’m a little concerned about privacy and safety. The internet and social media just make everything feel a little riskier. Has anyone else felt this way? Are there any specific precautions people take before going to a meetup?

Fantasy - Even though i have a clit and a cunt i want to put a pump on it until it grows and aches until i cry. Then be a cucked sissy for a domme to laugh at and use as they please. I want to be forced to hump a pillow and be told that im useless to men because my holes are stretched after the domme ruins them and then im useless to women because my clitty cock is too small… i want them to rename me and make me humiliated

Im bisexual and want to try and serve a domme. I used to be dominant in with My female partners however recently ive craved the things i used to crave to do.

I want to be stepped on. I want to be entertainment for a domme. However one of My fantasys leans more in the way that i should have a cock however im wondering if it can still be done.

If it can would it still count as a sissy or would i count as a bimbo even if i love pumping My clit that much that it is a very small penis.

Any advise or help as new to the sub for a domme scene id really appreciate

Thank you, Toy.

Does the body get used to pain and tolerate it better? When I have spanking sessions I can tolerate the pain but my body cannot. I have heat and pressure drops and I have already lost consciousness. Not because of the pain but really because of the drop in pressure. Do you think the body will get used to it and that over time I will become more tolerant? Thank.

My husband (late 30s, M, Dom) and I (late 30s, F, sub) have been with each other and enjoying kink together for 10 years. No relationship is perfect, of course, but we were very happy for the most part.

Last week, we had an intense scene that included forced PIV (all consented to, and we've done this before). After the scene was over, I expected that we'd do the usual aftercare, but instead he started instigating an argument about something else.

I asked him repeatedly (4 times) if we could talk about this another day, stating that I was dropping hard after the intense scene and needed aftercare. But he kept pushing the argument and getting colder and colder. I was just in disbelief at that point, because he'd always been conscientious about aftercare, and it started to feel like I didn't even know who this person in my bed was. Eventually, I realized that I wasn't going to be able to change his mind about where this was heading, especially with the flood of emotions and hormones coursing through my body at that time, and that I would have to deal with the subdrop alone. Crying, I left the room.

He came to me after about 5 minutes. Apologized profusely for everything, said he was wrong and that he'd do everything to make sure it didn't happen again, held me, belatedly gave me the aftercare that I'd said I needed. We had just come back from an amazing vacation, and he said he was struggling with going back to work and the negative points of his job, and he'd been having a rough time, but he needed to handle it better.

Intellectually, I believe him, and I forgive him. It was the first time it had happened in 10 years, he made things right very quickly, and it wasn't what I'd consider a "first degree offense" like a consent violation. It was still bad, but he's only human. I truly don't think it will happen again.

However, I've been struggling with how to heal from this. Our relationship is mostly back to normal now, I can laugh with him and enjoy spending time with him and even cuddle again. But the second I think about doing any kink with him, or even having vanilla sex with him, I feel nauseated and get flashbacks of that night, and I lose all my desire. This goes double for anything involving PIV.

He's said that he understands and it takes as long as it takes and there's no rush. But this isn't just about him. Kink and sex is important to ME, and I'm missing it. We're monogamous so I won't be getting it elsewhere (and even if we weren't, I don't think it would help this situation).

I can think of two ways to move forward from here, but I'm not sure which one would be best.

1. We put all kink and sex on hold until time heals my wounds and I can engage in it with him again without feeling uncomfortable. I'm not sure how long it will take or if it will even happen on its own, though...
2. We start trying again, but with baby steps. Maybe just vanilla outercourse for now, and see how it goes. I will still feel uncomfortable and I won't feel any desire for him at the start, but it probably won't be insurmountable. The idea is that each time we do this and we have the aftercare that I need, it will gradually replace the memories of that awful night, and I might start associating sex with him with a positive experience again. However, it could also make things worse, if I'm truly not ready...

Thoughts on which path to take would be much appreciated.

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to start this off, i am now 19 and living with family again and am safe. this started in october of 2023 and ended very very early january 2024.

last year i started talking to someone 35 while i was 18. he very quickly manipulated and groomed me. i did everything i could to be the perfect submissive for him, to the point it hurt me. i came into the relationship with a lot of kinks that i can't look at the same now. when he left me i burned the collar i had owned for years, i haven't been able to hear the word puppy without cringing, and im too scared to let myself get properly submissive again and too insecure to dom. i want to enjoy those kinks and things but it makes me feel so gross to remember all he did to me. i can't even think of having normal vanilla sex with his grossness popping up into my head.

do y'all have any advice besides time? im not in a hurry, i just wanna know if this may even be worth looking into or just letting go. i want myself back.

It can be like dos or donts . Or just something you experienced and faced a trouble and knew that more people knew about it cause it would actually help them ?

Hi, my GF and I are testing the waters of very light BDSM. I'm very intrigued by the idea of locking necklaces and have found some simple ones that I really like. I just like the idea of wearing something only she can remove. She's the more dominant one in our relationship and I feel safe with her. But I want to respect what locking necklaces/collars mean in the community. Is there something we need to be aware of if we do decide to get one? Is there certain meanings that I should steer clear from? A lot of them feature the "O" protection ring and I'm not sure if I should get something that has that. Any advice or tips are welcome.

So I want to try more kink scenes with my girlfriend of four years. We have basic things like 9 tails and cuffs and a makeshift blindfold, but I'm not sure what else I should get. We have rope and are getting better handcuffs. I've talked to her many times about this and she actually introduced me to the kink we just haven't fully dived into it yet. I was wondering what y'all use to set up your scenes and how to truly step into a dominant role. Any advice helpful

I use to be more active in the BDSM community, until I needed a break for my mental health. I had my issues and I got into a lot of toxicity from some members of the community. I use to be on Fetlife, but deleted my account to prioritize myself.

I'm trying to get back more involved, but I am a bit nervous and worrisome. I just need some advice. If this helps at all, I am in Chicago.

i’ve (18f) recently discovered an interest in cnc after a bit of experimentation with my (now ex) boyfriend. i’m not really sure how to bring this up to any future partners, but i would love to try it out. i’m a switch but lean more dominant. are there even guys that would be into being the sub here?

would also love any cnc vids with a male sub, i cant find any!!

thanks <33

I had the most sexually and personality compatible relationship I've ever had, we both pushed eachother to new limits and it was perfect like we could we could feel like we getting close to the edge of going to far but never going over, no matter what the kink we lined up and brought it out from CNC, impact, degrading, to even aftercare. Almost all our music was the same we were both homebodies, But there was 2 problems. 1. How far over 1k miles apart put a damper on things, 2 they just kept lying about different things in their past for no reason. Not even things that would make a difference from the lie some of the truths were better than the lie.

But I feel like I can't find someone with that lvl of connection again especially on the kink side bcus I don't want to do that long of distance it was to much and I live in the midwest

Ugh I found the most perfect dom. He degrades me and praises me and we get along so well. If I don’t call him sir he’ll make me correct my self. Only problem is he lives in Canada!! (I’m from US) ugh why does he have to live so far I’ve been craving for a perfect dom for so long.

I'm not sure about the right terminology for what he wants to try but basically:

• He doesn't want to participate but he wants to watch

• He wants me to take a dominant role with a man

• He wants the partner to watch while I sleep with their husband/boyfriend/partner/etc.

He described it as him wanting to use me as a tool to cuck other people, making me the bull on his behalf.

I'm on board with this as I've always had cuckcake fantasies, but I'm not sure what the terminology we should be using here is when looking for other couples who might want to try this?

Edit: Should also clarify that's he's my dominant and I'm his submissive

So I am new to the ddlg and bdsm community, only being in it for a few months. I have experience doing it online but nothing has worked out great. I feel like I need a good primer on tips for how to find good doms, ways of being a better sub, and just like how to see red flags quicker. Any sites, books, subreddits that might help with this? I am not in a dynamic rn so this is more just out of personal growth

My very vanilla wife of 16 years has never been able to open up to me about what turns her on. We have had some long droughts of no sex (6+ months) and after multiple conversations about what she would like to try, she would always tell me that she didn't know.

I've been pretty honest with her about my kinks and she has been great at accommodating and trying new things for my benefit but I felt like I could never return the favor.

Today, she told me that she has a rape fantasy. She was adamant that she would never want it to actually happen but the thought not being in control and being "forced" to have sex turns her on. I told her that I am willing to explore that with her but neither of us know how to proceed. I can tell it makes her very uncomfortable to even use the word rape. I told her that I think it's referred to as CNC.

How can we explore this further and make it feel "real" (her words). I would appreciate any advice from this community. Thanks and apologies for the long post!

If I wrap my scrotum between my penis and testicles so they are hanging down, will my scrotum stretch if I wrap it more and more? If it does, will it stay hanging down farther? How do people put those metal rings there, and do they keep adding them in a "stack" ??

My wife and I have been married about 10 years, we're the only people that we've ever slept with so our only experience is with each other.

Throughout our marriage I've tried to get her to talk more about our sex life, what she likes, doesn't like, fantasies etc and haven't really gotten much feedback at all.

Well a while ago she said something about wanting to try D/s things in the bedroom so since then I've been trying to read BDSM books and things on here and anywhere else that seemed like it had advice on how to get started.

My problem so far is that it's all pretty intense for someone who's never thought about it or done it before.

It sounds fun to be a Dom but I'm not sure how to start or how to break the ice so to say. I think that once we dip our toes in it won't feel so strange but I'm just not sure how to do that in the first place so that's why I'm here.

I'm looking for suggestions on baby steps into a D/s dynamic. Just little small things that I can start to do in the bedroom to establish things moving forward.

If you read all that, thank you! I'm looking forward to reading your thoughts & ideas!

Hello everyone, was just wanting to see if anyone had any good book recommendations on Domination/Submission? Maybe some good articles?

I’ve been trying to explore more within my kinks, but I am still a huge newbie- I don’t have the experience nor knowledgeable friends within the kink scene. I am very much interested in learning about how to approach the kink in a safe manner, how to find genuine longterm partners with good intentions. I lean towards DDLG, but not so much towards the age play type of stuff, but more so having this “Daddy” caregiving dom that still treats me at my age, as an adult, but I’m still able to submit to him and let him take control of many aspects of my life.

Any tips and recommendations helps, thank you in advance! 🫶

For context, My girlfriend and I have been together 6 months. She defiantly leans towards the vanilla side of sexual preferences and experiences but is very open to trying new things. My preferences and past experiences have been much more kink heavy but I am 90% content in our current situation. As a past pleasure dom, I’d just like to expand on the things we both like and fulfill the last 10%

Her go-to turn on is very light touches on her skin. We’ve tried caresses with fingers, feathers, rope, and most recently a wartenburg wheel. So far she likes the dragging of the hardened end of the rope the best.

We’ve been playing with bondage and/or shibari and incorporating a blindfold. Very basic harnesses or her tied to the bed and incorporating all the above touches along with vibrators.

She’s loved all of the above so far (especially the blindfold with the random touches) but I’d like to add more elements to this dynamic without pushing her boundaries too much (she does not like roughness, pain, or being forcefully dominated). She has expressed a fantasy of being tied to a table in an “industrial space” and being teased (She LOVES being physically teased) but doesn’t seem to know how expand on it.

Any ideas of toys, scenes, dirty talk, ties, etc that I haven’t thought of that might add another pleasurable element to the situation?

Thanks for the ideas beautiful kinksters!

I had the thought "Neat! There are probably so many non-verbal communications." While I was watching "It Follows" on a silly movie day with friends. In one of the choking scenes you could clearly see the two actors constantly communicating with each other during the scene by drumming their fingers on each other in response to the other. My friends didn't notice when I pointed it out and I thought it was neat!

So what are your favorite non-verbal signals be they scene breaking or not?

My partner and I want to experiment with breath play, and gags. But we are both worried that it will be difficult for me to hear him if he needs to stop. Or confuse his regular noises… with wanting to stop.

So we are looking for a button or clicker he can hold in his hand, and press in the event he can’t talk or make noise properly to have me stop. But all I can find are these gaudy Yes/No buttons, that neither of us like, ( we both want it to be at least mildly matching the Asthetic.), or doesn’t make a very good noise.

Does anyone have any suggestions?

I am 54M, girlfriend 58F, my girlfriend is mostly vanilla, I like BDSM and Kink, (very Kinky), and only a couple limits, and I know she has alot of limits that she will not exceed, haven't had sex in almost 3 years, I told her we need to spice things up in the bedroom, so we are supposed to talk tonight, how do I introduce here to Kink/BDSM, and what shall I start with? Need to ease into it, light Kink/BDSM to start with, don't want to turn her off from it, what I would like is for her to be my Mistress/Dom, I can switch Dom/sub, I don't think she could be a sub.. any advice?

Let me get straight, I’m learning from afar about BDSM but I’ve never actually tried anything. I’m even scared to do anything online to be honest (which is something I don’t understand either). But I often wonder how it’s supposed to work. How can you get the feeling of proximity and intimacy with someone you don’t see for sexual activities ?

A little about me is that I'm 18 and decided to put a post on here after much consideration for some help. For a while now I've been into things like futanari bdsm strapons femdom and pegging but recently played a porn game about a character becoming a sissy around futas and was very turned on and realises I should try it seen as I like it so much. The only thing I've done which is close to a sissy is wear a pair of my sisters panties which I very much regret and wish i never did and bought my own.

I like the whole idea of femdom strap ons pegging ect. And get very turned on by dominant women wearing strap ons however get very turned off when thinking about getting dominated by a male. Tonight I decided to shave my ass and penis region.

I'm posting here for some advice on what to do and what not to do. I'm also wanting to buy a butplug one where I give off alot of precum.

If anyone can help me that will be much appreciated. If you have read all of this then i thank you very much and can't wait to start this journey. Ps I will also be posting updates on here for what happens .

I have no interest in sex and want to arrange sessions that do not involve sex.

I am only interested in bondage (cuffs, collars, shackles, cages, gags, hoods) and some servitude (forced workout, doing chores etc.)

I am really hesitant to schedule any sessions even with people who seem well regarded in my local community. Am I being overly cautious with my concerns regarding health and diseases?

so, i have pretty violent kinks. i found out about them through this one acc i used to follow a while ago. Beating, stockholm syndrome, one that i refuse to say, blood, and very morbid concepts that i don’t feel comfortable sharing just because they’re very taboo. are blood kinks common? or is that one of the more rare kinks even in the bdsm community?

I think the title says it all. I have been experiencing this regularly when going to a munch/Event. When I bring someone new with me, because I would like to see if they are open to this (they always are), people I know or even some I might call friends, will come up to them and ask them if they want to be tied up, spanked, or whatever. Or they want me to approve of them playing with the person I am with. I don't think it's my place to either approve/decline for the other person, especially because we also don't know each other that well. And I'm happy if they can socialize on their own and are not a burden to me, because they don't have social skills.

I have to add that I am leaning more towards Monogam and the majority in my bdsm community is poly. It just happened recently again, went to a event it was our 3 Date, I didn't want to play and the mood was more chilling and talking. A friend asked if she could tie him up and they even slightly made out, well in front of me. I don't know how to feel about this.... yes we are not exclusive, yes everyone can say yes to opportunities when they appear. But because I have seen this pattern repeat again and again when I bring a date, I was wondering is this normal, or am I just unlucky with my community. Because for me it's clear that I would never do that to another person.

I have a few:

1. Is it possible for a dom to be submissive to another dom? Like a tier or hierarchy?
2. If, say a domme, has multiple doms she’s teaching to be a dom, how would the submissive address those doms?
3. How would the domme refer to those doms she’s dominating/teaching?
4. Would that situation just be sharing?
5. Are “mommy daddy” dom duos common?
6. Does this type of relationship have a name when a sub submits to a a dom couple who want to be addressed as mommy and daddy?

Asking for a friend (myself) haha. For context: I’m pretty new to BDSM and some of these situations stand out to me as ones I’d possibly like to try and also have seen in some who I know but am a little timid to ask people I know , thanks in advance for any advice/answers. I read through the rules but if I broke one let me know and I will fix it.