I've been out of practice for a good while and feeling nervous about it, and I don't want the reality of having been with guys hanging over my head like some shameful secret. It'll just make the nerves worse. There don't seem to be a lot of options for bi guys seeking women, so I guess most are just dl about it. I'd like the try the option of being in a situation that doesn't require hiding it, or even necessarily fixating on it, without the risk of humiliation or being blasted on social media since people love sharing everything online. I know there are m/f couples that look for male unicorns but I'm not really sure if that's the vibe I want. Any suggestions?

I lean way more towards hetero than bi, but I love the thought of fucking guys. I’ve had a few experiences, but never anal. I am a nerdy guy, so I get into my head a lot. I am only interested in topping. I have no interest in bottoming. My question is what makes a bottom a bottom, besides the obvious? Example, I can see a guy and be like, “ I’d fuck him” (mind you, I’ve never sucked a dick before), but what I don’t understand is what makes a guy think, “Yeah, I want him inside me” or “I really want him to fuck me”? How does that work? What turns me on about gay sex is the power dynamic, one person dominating the other, but what leads a person to wanting to be dominated? Any thoughts or experiences you care to share?

Really just gay porn, I should say. Most bisexual porn is threesomes or orgies and I'm not really into group sex, I prefer the one on one stuff.

I feel pretty confident in my ability to parse straight porn but gay porn is still kind of novel for me.

(I should also say I've been able to find gay porn on Reddit, I'm really looking for other websites, especially ones that allow you to download entire videos so I can save them on an external drive.)

I’m 25 (m) and my match (26m) met on tinder last week. He messaged me first on tinder. We got talking and he asked for my Snapchat. He sent me a photo of his legs but I said I don’t want to see that just yet. He respected that. We’ve been chatting over a week and I said to him that I don’t want to be used by him as an experiment and he said he doesn’t want to hurt me either. So we are going slow. He just released today to me that I’m the only guy he’s chatting to. He laughs a lot to my chats. He’s been flakey in messaging but he is now messaging me in the mornings.

How do I make this experience comfortable for him? He’s a good looking guy and such.

I'm 24m and married to my wife. I've want to know what it's like to have sex with a man and my wife is very supportive of it. I don't know where to start theirs a lot of gay dating apps and I'm only looking for a hookup not to date. I've only ever been with my wife too so to call me inexperienced would be an understatement. I'm only really interested in like bottoming, giving blowjob, stuff like that, I don't know if that's at all relevant.

I'm sure this sub gets stuff like this all the time thank you for reading

I've never downloaded or checked out any dating apps, I was curious of your experiences or how easy it was to get started. I tell myself every time that I'll come around but I never really do. Any recommendations or tips? Interested in hearing your thoughts!!

Bi college aged guy. I would say my attraction is 65/35 male/female but I have been talking to this girl and I really think we could have something special

My only thing is that I kinda wanna experience having a romantic relationship with a guy before a girl. I feel like I prefer guys a decent bit more but I’ve never been in a relationship with one. I’ve done things with both girls and guys but never relationships with either. I may just be curiosity born from repressing my sexually until I got to college or some other trauma-based response but yeah

Anyone else feel like this? I know this is kinda problematic to think because why would I pass up a perfect girl just to try being with a guy, but the thought stays in my head sometimes

I must have terrible luck cause absolutely no guy that seems interested actually wants to meet, hangout, or get to know me.

Last month I matched on Tinder with a guy I had met and and hung out with a few times before. He was new to the area and wanted to make friends but moved away to be closer to his job (about an hour commute from where we lived). After we matched on Tinder I told him about a concert I wanted to see that was in his neck of the woods. He seemed interested and wanted to hang. I asked if he REALLY was interested and he said yeah he doesn’t know the bands playing but that he did want to hangout. Even told me he’s breaking off tentative plans he had with others for that night. I bought two tickets the night before on my break at work and texted him that I bought them. Crickets. The next morning I texted him asking if he actually was interested and he said he doesn’t think he’d like the music but he may be interested in hanging out after for a drink (to be fair it was GWAR 😆) I told him the show gets out late so I probably won’t be doing that. Tickets are non refundable so now I had this extra ticket and little time to find someone else. Luckily my straight army buddy was getting off from work around the time the show started so he was able to come enjoy it with me.

The next week I matched with a nurse in his mid thirties. Real buff ginger who said he was interested in working out with me and getting to know me. Cool. With my membership I can bring a guest. Our hours and schedules were similar so it looked like it was gonna work. We set up a time at 11pm. I got there at 10:30pm and waited in my truck. I texted him asking if he’s still coming and told him that I was here. He said yeah he’ll be running a little bit late but that for sure he’ll be there. So I wait a little longer. I thought I saw him pull up in his car so I get out and wait to greet him. It’s a straight guy and his wife or gf and they just look at me as they go in. I got on my phone to not look like a complete dork and texted him that I’ll be going in to start in a little bit if it’s alright with him. He said okay see you there. I decided to give it a minute but by then I had been standing out in 50 degree weather in shorts, a tank, and thin hoodie so I made my way. I get started and about five minutes in on the treadmill I look at my phone and he’s vanished. I got so upset over this one that I couldn’t even finish my workout completely and was half assing everything. I left and went to bed sad.

Then last week a cute young guy hmu on Grindr and said he likes my profile, wanted to meet me. I thought he was fake or wanted something but no it turns out he is real and lives in the area. He’s this slim toned twink with a bit of an edge (gauges in his ears, colors his hair). Last night I planned on going to see the new Joker movie and asked if he wanted to go. He said he’s broke and I said that’s fine I could get him I just wanted to get to know him. He said he wanted to blow me in a stall and the theater (big red flag) I told him we’ll see what happens but that they usually have a cop posted in the lobby for security. The movie started at 10pm and he said he wanted to be there at 9:30pm to meet outside. Okay. On snap I’m telling him getting ready, heading out, I’m here. I bought both tickets and sit to wait for a little bit. It’s 9:40ish pm and there’s no sign of him. I tell the guy working entrance that I’m waiting for a friend and he asked for his name. He said okay I’ll let him in when he shows up. I ask him on snap if he’s here and he says yeah he’s in the parking lot. I said okay cool and asked if he wanted anything from concession. Snap does the bug out and I already knew what happened. He’s gone. I can see that he’s viewed my stories but it won’t let me see his profile. The movie was already starting and I asked if I can get one ticket refunded. The manager refunds it to my card and is nice about it but I could tell he and the staff knew I had a no show date (probably thought it was a girl 😆). I go into the theater and it’s practically empty just a cute young straight couple and me all by my lonesome. On occasion when the lighting from the screen was bright enough I could see the couple cuddling, holding hands, just whispering in each other’s ears. I lost it and started crying right there. I haven’t cried in over a year but goddamn I felt so worn down and the movie’s subject matter didn’t help. After it let out I decided to go get a drink and at one spot I usually go out to the bartender is this new girl and her bf is there sipping on coke at the bar. They’re being a cute couple and this just made me feel worse. I had a few more drinks and left. I went to another bar and saw an old friend there. I told him what happened with this recent no show and who it was. He said he knows this guy and that it doesn’t surprise him, not to lose any sleep over it. Turns out the guy has a bf too. Like wtf. Guy’s got a bf and is seeking outside the relationship but I can’t even get guys to show up.

I HAVE been on a few dates before where the other person actually shows but these don’t go anywhere and all they really want is sex and the validation of intimacy from someone new.

Any advice on how I can deal with this? I’m in a low place now but I feel like maybe taking a break from putting myself out there. I feel like there’s a lack of genuine interest in other people and no real sense of consideration. I dunno, please let me know what you think.

Hey, Bi Bros. 24M here, and I’ve recently accepted and fully embraced my bisexuality after thinking I was strictly gay my whole life. And while this is all great, I’m really interested into recalibrating my dating life to try dating or at least hooking up with women for awhile. Only problem is, all of my intimate and romantic experience thus far has been with guys. Has anybody else here experienced this? Any experienced bi bros out here have any advice on meeting women and finding potential FWB’s/hookups/dates?

Hope you’re all taking care of yourselves!

Came out to my best friend/crush

Well, I am not sure if this counts as coming out to her, we are really close and I really adore this girl, she knows, but we have not really discussed the matter or put pressure on it (turning or not into a couple), the most sexual thing we usally do is cuddling, and I often spank and squeeze her ass, so all fine for me (i usually satisfy my lust with other girls), we also used to work out together (at my home gym) and things stayed in that warm, steamy but ambiguos state, for me at the moment thats all fine. Moving to the main topic, we usually share plenty of stuff through instagram dmss and emails, like nerdy stuff we are into, jokes, travel ideas, since we started training together I started to share with her both classical fit girl booty influencers (think mostly Brasilian style curvy fit girls) but also, what would be the gay equivalent, I mean strippers and gay models,(also thong clad very built guys), I dared to tell her that one day I would love to model like that, and she was as usually entusiastic and happy about it, she wished me luck in getting built like a stripper and told me that it would be a very interesting twist on my acomplishments. Recently I also told her about my first experience wearing a thong at a public pool, I told her that I was very shy about telling her, but that it feel extremley addictive to feel so sexy and catching looks, I told her that I hope she joins me soon (of course she is super curvy, thick and drop dead gorgeous, but very shy about her clothing), and that I would like to dress in lesther lingerie with her for a pride parrade, she laughed but was also happy about it. She moved to another City, not far away, for her máster degree, I hope that both of us have time to hang out or go on a vacation soon, but I also nervous since I did not put much tought into this, In our usual semi autistic way I emailed her a couple of articles about the increased prevalence of bisexuality and its possible genetic and social divers, as usual I teased her about her girl crush on Dua Lipa and Braszilian dancers, and added that I would fell glad if an extremley sexy boy considered me worthy of seduction and that I will not resist. All goes in acordance to our usual humor, and tone of interactions, maybe I am being a bit paranoid. She is the closest I have had to a girlfriend on a long time, I have had couple of friends with benefits, but the bond and feeling does not compare to what I feel for her. I know that, thats why I care so much, most of my female friends now fully about my cravings and ocasional gay experiences, but since although I find all of them very hot, their opinión of me did not really mattered that much to me. If this girl ever turned into my girlfriend (I know, I know we almost dry hump and cuddle on the same bed while traveling, but just for the sake of naming the social constructs), I am affraid of repulsing her, I know that once she dated a bisexual guy, horrible abusive dude, from friends In common I know that she was always kind of insecure due to his mostly gay past experiences (let alone the usal problems a young girl faces when dating a narcisit). I know that I will get extremley nervous, and probably I will blush if I she ever asks me directly about my bisexuality, honestly I want her to, the idea just turns me on so much. Only once I had sex with a guy, it was just a casual hook up, its funny that this boy lived very close to her, I actually told him, he said that we would do all what I long have craved to do with her and to her, delicious experience (we were making out in shiny thiny thongs for so long), I craved so much that she was there, either to join or just to watch. What ever feedback you have its appreciated, I just wanted to vent out mostly. Thanks so much for reading.

I’m used to women, and always have been with them and really find it easy to reach out, talk, and date them. Men are a bit new to me and I seem to attract really beautiful and interesting men around the age of 30 (if it helps with an answer). I’m really new to this and yeah finding the conversations are way more tuned to sex than I’m used to (but it’s fun!). If you meet someone and start texting and sharing photos, as well as getting to know them on snap or something, what’s a normal expectation for a first get together?

One really adorable guy wanted me to come over, talk, cuddle, and ‘love on me’. But he also stood me up. I don’t know if that’s a normal activity from a first date perspective.

I’m really comfortable talking with this new guy and think he’s amazing. Super attractive and good conversation. We agreed to meet up on an upcoming day but haven’t set details yet. We most certainly have a strong interest for each other. Seems just like a genuine good person too. I think the initial idea is aiming for fwb but I think we’re also pretty horny for each other.

Can you give me an idea of what’s typical? I’m certainly comfortable even just inviting him over or going to his place like the last guy wanted.

I’m really struggling not having an idea of the range of what’s typical/expected while also absolutely completely preferring men now and for the foreseeable future.

So I (23m) had been talking with this guy on grindr and we really seemed to hit it off. But then we got to it, and it seemed like the air went out of it pretty quickly. After i had gotten out of his aparment after he texted me to say sorry but we won't be seeing eachother again.

I am pretty inexperienced. But i still feel so shit. Maybe i was to nervous?? I don't know it just feels so shit guys

I’m 31, nearly 32, and I’ve been in a relationship with my girlfriend for about five years. On the surface, everything seems fine, but I’ve been dealing with something that’s getting harder to ignore. I’ve always identified as straight, but for a while now, I’ve had this deep desire to have sex with a guy, in a completely different role than how I have sex with women. It’s something that conflicts with how I see myself and my identity.

I feel stuck because my girlfriend wouldn’t understand this at all—she’s made negative comments about bi guys before. And beyond that, I’ve grown up in environments filled with homophobic attitudes, like playing football and hearing comments from my friends and even my girlfriend’s family. My family history complicates things, too; I found out as a teenager that my dad had been cheating on my mum with men, and the backlash from that really left a mark on me.

The problem is, these desires aren’t going away, and I’ve been through this cycle many times—getting the urge, fantasizing, acting on it in private (alone), then feeling intense shame and guilt afterward. I keep convincing myself that it’s not worth it, but I also feel like I can’t live my whole life denying this part of myself.

What’s making it worse is that my girlfriend really wants children, and I’m terrified of ending up in a situation like my dad did, where I’m living a lie and eventually hurt the people I care about. But at the same time, I’m scared that if I act on these desires, I’ll lose my sense of masculinity, my relationship, and even limit my future dating pool because I believe most women wouldn’t want to be with a bi guy.

I’ve been thinking a lot about acceptance and how to stop feeling so much shame and guilt around these desires. I know logically that my desires don’t make me less of a man or a worse person, but emotionally, it’s hard to shake the feeling that I’d be judged or rejected if people knew the truth.

I’m at a crossroads. I don’t want to feel trapped by these feelings anymore, but I also don’t know how to move forward without ruining what I have or living with this constant guilt. Has anyone been through something similar or has advice on how to find acceptance with yourself when your desires conflict so much with your self-identity?

Thanks for taking the time to read this, and any support or perspective would mean a lot to me right now.

So i posted here weeks ago about my colleague whom I fell in love with. I was already distant from him even until my whole vacation came and I was gone for like a month. Now I just came back at work and he hugged me tightly and told me he really missed me a lot where I was wondering as we were on silent treatment for almost a few months already coz I know like what I always tell myself He doesn’t like me like how I like him romantically hence the decision to distance myself from him. Out of nowhere I saw him randomly alone in a cafè and invited me to go out with him the next day like cafè, eat and drink at a club nearby. Now I am scared that I would get drunk and confess my feelings to him. Should I? Irdk what he wants from me. I just thought he could be already pissed off of me due to my emotional drama. And honestly I was starting to move on but now I am back at square one again. 🥲😓😮‍💨

Some context, I have know that I was bi/pan since I was young. Like many of you, and early exposure to futanari hentai probably helped me realize this and come to terms with it. I have been with many men and trans since.

I got married a few years ago with a woman who told me she accepted this fact about me, and was open to exploring in the bedroom and with others. But sadly, after getting married, I found out that she is actually disgusted and turned off by men being with men, or by anything trans, and etc. She doesn't really want me to put toys up my own ass, or hers. And full on monogamy only, nothing else. Which is odd, because she let me fool around with a few guys and one trans while we dated. She seemed a bit more open while dating, and closed all of that off immediately after marriage.

I'm honestly craving cock (and ass) like crazy. My sexual desires are restricted to hentai and porn now. Which granted it takes care of the immediate urge, but that issue always rears its head again.

Are there any of you in a similar situation as this? You got married, and are now in such a situation where you essentially have to put your bisexual/pansexual desires back into the closet? What have you done to try and handle it? What would you advise me to do?

I had a nice nonsexual experience in a locker room sauna a couple days ago. Long story short, I struck up a conversation with someone in the sauna at my gym. It started with me asking him why he went from the shower to the sauna. I’m typically a shy guy but I was wondering if I was doing the sauna wrong or something. I’m also just tired of being lonely tbh.

Turns out we work in similar fields. We exchanged names and pleasantries. I was nervous to talk because he was in his underwear. Whenever I use the sauna I keep my shorts on.

He was very attractive with a six pack. He said he hoped to see more of me in the future before heading to the shower. I don’t think it was an advance but I can be dense some times.

Only a few years ago I came out to myself as bi. Since then I had sex with guys 3 times, always bottom.

But tonight I got fuckd soooo good, be on top for the first time, then got bent over on the sofa.

Makes think of all the cocks I could've sat on my whole life! What a waste of time...

I decided to watch the show after it won all those Emmys and was kinda shocked by it's portrayal of bisexuality/pansexuality. Not in a bad way, it's just so rare to see things discussed that frankly.

To be clear, I've never been a victim of abuse like the main character in the show. But I used to hook up with men, and while I'm still attracted to them, it really shined a light on some of my behavior in my 20s / pre-pandemic, when I'd hook up with guys. It really made me question how much of that was out of attraction and how much of it was just simply reveling in the attention after feeling rejected sexually by women. I used to leave those encounters feeling so rotten...and then go back, just like Donny. Now I have a gf I love and feel so much more confident in myself.

Dunno if anyone else experienced that watching the show...

Hey y’all, I’m 28 and just recently came to terms with my sexuality and I’m having difficulty navigating the dynamics of talking to gay men and also don’t have any irl friends who I feel comfortable discussing it all with.

I’ve been talking to this man since the end of July, it started as just a FWB situation but we have both expressed interest in dating. I had to move away at the start of September (will be back in the same area come spring) but we decided to keep talking.

Things have been going well, but this week he’s been kinda distant and has left me on read twice. Should I take this as a sign he’s not interested anymore? I know I could just ask but I feel like I’m just overreacting.

Update: he texted me this morning to let me know he’s getting back with his ex! Haha mystery solved. I’m having a great time

Hi everyone! First time posting on Reddit and English is not my first language.

I (M26) dated a woman from the age of 19 to 21. She was my first girlfriend: we lived together, had our first apartment together.

Since my breakup, I’ve explored my bisexuality more with men.

Today, four years later, I find out she gave birth to a child. (Side note: I often dreamt that she was pregnant in the last years).

Also, I’m in a relationship and engaged to a man with whom I want to buy a home and start a family in 1-2 years.

I know I don’t love her anymore, don’t know if it’s the jealousy of having a "normal" family, but I’m feeling weird.

Is that normal? Did someone live something similar?

I’m fairly new to exploring my sexuality. I’m a straight leaning male who considers himself bisexual. I’m in a heterosexual relationship with a woman but have the freedom to explore and be open with my sexuality. I’m learning in my exploration that I’m attracted to men who are considered “Twinks” but I would consider myself a bottom. Is there a subreddit where I can find “twinks” that are tops or verse, Or is it just a matter of continuous exploration?

I’m nearly 33, Latino and have been bi my whole life. Mostly find myself now being homo-romantic and only interested in dating other bi men. I find this to be the easiest, so I don’t feel like need to mask certain parts of my sexuality, or feel pressured into gay cultural things that aren’t for me. Other bi bros on the same boat? This isn’t a hard-line rule, but bisexuality moves you up to the top of my interest list.

I’m my search for a straight type fwb it seems every one I find that would interest me is hours away. Everyone I find local is into fetishs that do not interest me. If I’m seeking out someone who is a laid back jeans and t shirt kind a guy straight acting am I really narrowing my options that drastically? Sniffies and Reddit mostly. Tried Grindr but being new to all it wasn’t for me. Am I doing something wrong? I just want to connect with a guy or couple who just want to play cards, hang out and play. Any help is appreciated

I finally told myself that I’m bi but still on the DL since I lack the courage to come out. I started to get curious back in ‘04 when I moved from the west coast to the south, now living in the Midwest. I don’t have the urge to date or be in a relationship with a guy, just want sex. End game is to have a wife and kids.

Ive been friends with this dude(we’ll call Toby) for over 10 years and he’s one of my best friends. I wanted to have sex with him ever since we met and became friends. He’s the typical fit, hot, blonde hair white dude. I definitely wouldn’t mind if he absolutely destroys me and does whatever he wants with me in bed. I have a feeling it will never happen cause he’s straight and has had several girlfriends.

A couple of years or so into our friendship is when I got a glimpse of his dick. We were at one of our friend’s house just the three of us hanging out smoking weed, talking and they were drinking. Then our friend’s coworker shows up a while later, small Filipino chick with a wild side, and is now hanging out with us. After some time I went to the basement and passed out before any of them I was so high. At some point in the night I woke up to turn over and that’s when I saw Toby getting head from the Filipino chick. Even though I was groggy I could tell he was at least 7” cut. I didn’t look at them long since they noticed I was moving around. I wanted to join them really bad but I had never sucked dick before. I was hesitant and afraid they wouldn’t agree. I just laid there with my back to them debating if I should turn back over to watch discreetly. I didn’t. Just went back to sleep.

The following morning when Toby was driving me home he asked if I saw anything last night. I wanted to say yes but something in me decided to say no, hoping he would tell me what happened. He didn’t and we rode in silence almost the entire way. Looking back on it now I should’ve said yes. I just couldn’t bring myself to do/say anything at the time, early 2010s. Ever since that night I wanted to fuck him even more. I would often fantasize about it whenever I jerk off.

Now that we’re older I want to tell him I’m bi on the DL. Not in the hopes that he’ll wanna fuck but just so that he knows something extremely personal about me. For some reason he’s the only one I want to tell atm, not even my family knows. I grew up in the 90s so idk when I’ll have the courage to fully come out. I’m scared that when I tell him it will affect our friendship. He doesn’t have any problems with people being gay/bi/trans etc., but I feel like we wouldn’t be as close once he knows. I’ve never made a move on him or any of my hot friends. I’ve always given off the impression that I’m straight.

I’m at the point where if I get the chance to sleep with him I’m definitely taking it, but I’m also ok if it doesn’t happen so long as we’re still friends. Do you think I should tell him anyways? Any feedback is appreciated, thanks.

What's crazy is I'm bi and get hit on by more women than men cuz my style is very metrosexual and I wear rings and chains and wife beaters. What does it mean to look "straight"? I'm so confused. I'm literally in NYC. Every other straight guy on the street dresses similar to me in some sense.

So I just got back from hanging out with a group of friends I haven’t seen in a while. I met these guys (they’re all roommates) last fall. One of them is a guy I’ve known for a while who identifies as ace, but he said he’s into men and women. I knew this about him almost as long as I’ve known him. We’re also both autistic and have fairly similar interests. He has ADHD too, so he has a bit of a difficult time focusing sometimes. When he initially told us that he was ace, I didn’t reveal I was bi out of fear of being judged by the rest tbh (a silly concern given he mentioned it freely, but I was just like that). Tonight, when we were joking about gay stuff, I casually mentioned I was bi. We were both fairly clinical with each other about it and he brought up that he thought it was interesting that autistic people tended to be more likely to be into the person rather than the gender. He told me he was more into women generally for sex and romance, but said he wouldn’t be opposed to the idea of a romantic relationship with a man.

I didn’t tell him that I was into him specifically when I told him I was bi. This is partly because I wasn’t really sure how to go about telling him that I’m into him. Also, even if he were to say yes and try something out with me, I’m honestly unsure of how I would approach it and if I’d get too intimidated by the idea of actually openly dating a guy. I’m not sure how his roommates would react to hearing about it either if it ever actually happened.

Not sure if any of this is making sense, but what do you think I should do in this situation? I like him a lot and wouldn’t want to hurt him in any way if he wanted to try out a relationship. How can I do this right?

Would appreciate any advice.