/r/bisexualadults

Photograph via snooOG

A subreddit for adults looking to discuss their bisexuality and some of the issues that may arise from it.

(This community is not for conducting research, please do not send your requests to the moderators.)

This is a community for adults looking to discuss their bisexuality, and would prefer to do so with other adults. If you are not an adult, keep in mind, this is a place geared for adults. This is not meant to be a NSFW subreddit, so please label any NSFW posts as such.

Moderation: Ideally this will be a community moderated subreddit, with downvotes and comments to ensure good content. I would try to refrain from removing comments, or banning users. However, there are some rules:

1) No doxxing, posting personal information in threads, or threatening people. I cannot stress this enough. If you knowingly post someone else's personal information or threaten someone you will be banned and reported to the admins. There will be no warnings issued for this. It is completely unacceptable.

2) Be civil - No hatespeech or bigotry. That means no racism, no sexism, no homophobia, no transphobia, and certainly no biphobia. We have to share this same space with many people, and it's on us to make this a space where everyone feels welcome and valued.

3) NO PORN and NO PERSONALS ADS. This is not a porn sub, this is not a hook-up sub, and we're not here to look at your dick pics.

4) This is a subreddit for adults, please act like it. I would hope that this one does not need an explanation. Obviously this is an issue that can (in most cases) be dealt with using voting and comments. If you see something that shouldn't be here, please report it.

5) No blogspam. While the occasional post from a blog is acceptable, multiple blogposts a day from one user is not, and they will be marked as spam. Please use your common sense on this issue. If you feel something was unfairly marked as spam, feel free to message the modmail.

As far as an FAQ on many LGBT issues, r/ainbow has a great one in their sidebar, and r/bisexual has a great one on bisexuality in their sidebar.

I would also like to add that this subreddit, while focusing on bisexual/pansexual people, is not restricted to these groups. Anyone in the LGBT community, and straight people are welcome to post or comment here as well.

American Institute of Bisexuality

Related subreddits:

r/ainbow

r/bisexual

r/pansexual

r/questioning

r/askGSM

r/BiGoneMild

r/NonBinary

r/Biguys

NSFW Subreddits:

r/Bisexy

r/bigonewild

If you would like to have a subreddit added to this sidebar, please message the modmail.

/r/bisexualadults

89,735 Subscribers

7

Considering being a couples 3rd?

Met a great couple and they asked if I’d like to go further(casually) and Ive never done anything like this before.

I’ve dated men my whole life but have always been interested in women. I’ve also never been with a woman(I’d like to) How should I navigate this with being respectful of others sexuality? Any tips? Anything I need to consider? Of course ask for std testing

2 Comments
2024/11/05
22:25 UTC

0

What would you do?

You come home unexpectedly and your spouse is engaged in bi activity. What do you do, join in, interrupt it,or completely flip out?

7 Comments
2024/11/05
18:13 UTC

0

Hello, I'm the mod or r/AGAMP, a subreddit dedicated to discussing the origins of the desire for men to feminize themselves as well as the attraction to feminized men. I suspect that many bisexuals are also AGAMP and GAMP.

r/AGAMP

Consider AGAMP a sort of "in-between" stage between cisman and transwoman.

Although the term used in sexiological research is "shemale" and generally considered offensive (except by us) I highly believe that many bisexual men have the same etiological drive to feminize themselves.

Check out the stickied "compiled resources" post for all of the info I've been able to find on the research (include the subject of heterosexual men's attraction to feminized males).

I'm hoping this generates discussion so that we can all figure ourselves out and make the right choices for our lives.

4 Comments
2024/11/05
15:08 UTC

2

Bisexual femme Cebu

I just moved to Cebu for work and my schedule ends at midnight, so quite a long day. During those hoyrs I cant help but imagine how nice it would be to have some coffee dates or simply tell someone about my day. Because that would help a lot and elevate my not-so-dull corporate life.

Btw, I work at IT PARK CEBU.

P.s I am bi girl/femme

6 Comments
2024/11/05
06:20 UTC

0

COUPLE ALERT

C2C FFM MFM

Mumbai

4 Comments
2024/11/04
15:31 UTC

0

I love cum

17 Comments
2024/11/04
07:17 UTC

6

Do you wish everyone in the world was bisexual ?

Would life be easier/more exciting if everyone was bisexual ? I guess marriage would be like between four people. A guy marries his girlfriend and also his male best friend (who is married to his own gf). Everyone gets to play with everyone (one on one or together)

View Poll

16 Comments
2024/11/04
01:32 UTC

0

Alguien para paja

Soy bi tengo 48

3 Comments
2024/11/03
19:14 UTC

0

What did I say that was so controversial?

In a thread I made asking if life would be better for bisexuals if there was no Abrahamic religions. Some one said, “It's tricky, because something else similar very likely would have taken its place.Without getting too into the weeds of it, religions provide a bunch of different and positive things for people, and I think all the hateful, negative baggage attached to religion is the nasty side of humanity peeking through at the same time.The nasty side of humanity that injected hate into religions in the first place would still exist, and the need for some type of ideology, shared community, culture, rules, shared spirituality, etc. would also still exist and would be just as ripe for exploitation.”

And I said, “But the thing is there is no human nature. Humans are the products of their environment. Their material and social conditions. So ‘human nature’ evolves to fit these conditions. So if there were no homophobic Abrahamic religions to socialize hate, why hate? Do you really think hate is biological? Are you really that essentialist/deterministic? But I might be saying this as I’m reading Sartre’s ‘Search for a Method.’”

And it got downvoted. And I got a response telling me to diversify my reading to “understand people better.” But what I’m saying is not just Marxist sociology but also overlaps with much of sociology generally thanks to thinkers like Gramsci and Adorno. Saying that we’re products of our environment shouldn’t be controversial. Feminism talks all the time about socialization under the patriarchy. But as soon as you mention socialization under any other circumstances that’s some commie shit and bad in the eyes of the Overton window.

10 Comments
2024/11/03
17:50 UTC

0

How do youh

How do you find the people that are online

2 Comments
2024/11/03
07:50 UTC

35

Do any of you feel life would be better for us bisexuals (or people in general) if the Abrahamic religions didn’t exist or they never assumed hegemony over the morality and culture of the world?

I feel so alone as a bi man. Even with my online boyfriend. The biphobia I see online. The invisibility of bi men in the media. I and other bi men wouldn’t face this shit if we didn’t have Abrahamic religion. And in cultures before or free from Abrahamic religion, or at least Christianity, the men are all (or mostly) bi. Ancient Greece, Rome, Golden Age Arabia, The Medieval Ottoman Empire, Feudal Japan, Han China, and Celtic Britain and Ireland all had widespread male bisexuality until Christians arrived. Either as converters or colonizers or both. But all Abrahamic religion is at fault. How it would be better to live in a world free from homophobic/biphobic life-denying slave morality, capitalism, and imperialism which are all things Abrahamic religion promotes. Am I right?

33 Comments
2024/11/03
00:21 UTC

5

IDK how to tell….

How can you tell if the same sex is flirting with you in public or just being nice when he or she sees your spouse with you and do any of yall flirt with straight people in public? I had a girl the other day really going out of her way to be nice but was that just her being courteous or what? How do I throw down the bi vibe basically when I’m in public?

8 Comments
2024/11/02
18:02 UTC

1

Bisexual/Kayaking

4 Comments
2024/11/02
04:40 UTC

64

Bisexual men , what's the best thing in sex with women and sex with men ?

What do you enjoy most in sex with a man and with a woman ?

42 Comments
2024/11/02
01:49 UTC

6

Bisexual and Attracted to Trans Women—Unsure How to Approach This with My Partner

Hey Reddit,

I’m a bisexual guy, and I’m attracted to both cis and trans women. I’ve been in a relationship with my cis girlfriend for about four years, but I’ve never shared my sexuality with her. It’s something I kept private, but lately, I’ve been wondering if I should bring it up.

The interesting thing is, she’s actually asked me a couple of times if I would ever be interested in a trans woman, which threw me a bit. I wasn’t expecting her to ask, and it felt surprisingly close to home. But I didn’t bring up my sexuality then—I just kind of shrugged it off.

Now, I’m at a bit of a crossroads. Should I share this part of myself with her? If so, what’s the best way to do it, given that it’s been four years and this hasn’t come up before? I want to be open, but I’m not sure if it’s the right move or if I should leave things as they are.

Any advice on how to navigate this would be really appreciated!

24 Comments
2024/10/31
16:19 UTC

33

Tips on dating women as a bi guy.

Hey all. I'm a bi polyamorus guy with 2 bfs. I also want to date women but have a hard time finding one's who are accepting. I usually have to explain that im not gay. Any advice on finding women who are interested in not only bi guys but poly guys as well?

27 Comments
2024/10/30
18:40 UTC

12

Sub for Fellatio Givers

Hello, I created r/fellatiogivers for those of us that enjoy giving fellatio. A place to share stories, techniques etc.

4 Comments
2024/10/30
04:18 UTC

9

Having a hard time defining connections with genuine, just-being-friendly straight men. How do you not get drawn to them?

I (26M) am currently studying in Korea, and still as closeted as I was in my hometown. I’m only open to my closest and most trusted friends only. And since I’m sure this is a pretty conservative country, I decided to stay as such while I wait to find my tribe (though ngl it’s been so hard to find community here).

Good to note: As an extrovert, I used to always initiate getting to know people I want to be friends with, or a person I’m interested in. But the pandemic isolation shifted me in a way that for some reason I don’t want to go out of my way to do that anymore. Also crediting a major heartbreak from a guy who happened to see me just as a really good friend.

It wasn’t until one month that I made friends in class. And it wasn’t until two weeks ago that I met a guy who wanted to become language exchange partners. This Korean happens to be the first guy ever in recent memory (both here and in my hometown) that approached me on their own.

Naturally, as a closeted queer who’s always the “befriender” and never the “befriended”, I felt too shocked and flattered since thr locals aren’t necessarily top-of-mind friendliest towards my nationality as of my friends’ stories, my observation, and some scrolling through Reddit haha. I might be overreacting but I genuinely don’t even remember how it feels to be befriended anymore. It felt so fun and great that, yes, you guessed it: I went over my head and got too delusional to see where it goes in a different light. I think the queer media I’ve been consuming recently also added fuel to the fire.

It’s only been a few weeks but we’ve managed to take very long walks while teaching languages to each other, and even made time to meet in cafes late at night to do the same. I started asking my friends if straight guys usually hang out that long here just to talk, since I really have no idea how to process my superficial excitement. But as everyone on the internet said: you can’t trust your gaydar in Korea.

I was enjoying it all too much so the universe reminded me that he’s a MAN man that’s just being friendly and wants to learn English (to be fair he’s not shortchanging me on Korean). But at a recent coffee meet-up, he was just asking how to explain a certain expression. But when I asked back how to say it in Korean, it apparently ends up becoming a very sexist and misogynist phrase sprinkled with borrowed English words. He reaffirms that “it’s fine to say it with just your close guy friends”. In the interest of social learning, I told him why he shouldn’t say things like that in both languages. But that moment blocked me from whatever road I was planning to tread.

It was a good feeling to be pulled out of that fantasy. (Well, he did already say he went on a blind date with a girl over the weekend. While it’s easy to lie about that, actions just HAD to speak louder than words lol) I’m just worried that I’ll just always have a hard time getting out of this scenario where I always end up projecting the companionship I yearn for each time I meet a kind, approachable guy that comes to me first.

It might be weird to ask advice for this, but I’m sincerely asking: how do you not get drawn to mere kindness? How do you hold on to the hope that the right person will come to you? And not go crazy to the kindest guy in the room like a dog playing tricks for treats?

As someone who’s never been in a committed relationship, but has had his fair share of both breaking hearts and being heartbroken, I don’t really know anymore if I’ll ever be in a relationship. It’s hard enough not being able to socialize over drinks anymore due to health constraints, and I’m not even at the bare minimum of their dating app standards here (apparently you have to be so toned or buffed to be considered for a right swipe). So yeah. I’m just yapping for a footnote, but thanks if you made it this far. Just wanted to keep hoping that someone’s meant for me eventually.

4 Comments
2024/10/29
17:01 UTC

5

Of the following threeway what is the difference between them?

MFM, MMF, FMM?

19 Comments
2024/10/29
12:33 UTC

3

Straight/Bi guys

I’m looking for advice I guess. We are a long time enm couple that has recently realized we are more bi than not. I can’t say I am the definition of bi, but she definitely is.

Regardless, we have a few “single men” that join us for 2 on 1 straight sex. One we recently found is rather “flexible” and we hope to get downs on that even further. But 2 local guys haven’t let on to any sort of flexibility. But neither did the other. Nor did a guy who joined us monthly for years … we never knew until someone told law told us.

My question is: how would you go about asking/finding out if they have any bi tendencies or interest in trying, without alienating them.

They’re great guys. Manly men (masculine, as am I) past football player and a body builder!

We don’t want to mess up what we have but know it can be so much more. How would you get them to pull that thread as I did with the other guy. These 2 guys don’t talk that much with us. One exclusively talks to her. The other we rarely talk to unless organizing a hook up.

Any ideas that don’t require risking the current run relationship. In other words we can’t just ask, “so, you ever consider letting a guy blow you? Have you ever wanted to try fucki a guy?”

It would need to subtle. I’m normally pretty good at exposing a thread, with lots of conversation, but without it, I’m at a loss.

21 Comments
2024/10/29
12:00 UTC

1

BiCurious at Yale

Any other buddy at Yale into str8porn for a JO session?

5 Comments
2024/10/29
09:15 UTC

6

I'm Feeling Confused...Yet Sure

I am discovering at nearly forty, that I may be Bi/Finsexual. I know what excites me and attracts me. I love femininity in many aspects. I'd like someone to shepherd me on if my feelings are true or fetishism. I wouldn't dare wish to look down upon a group of people as a source for sexual objectification. I've identified as hetero in past but I realize I have an intense allure to a type. How does one know if they truly belong in a world?

1 Comment
2024/10/29
03:53 UTC

0

Question. Do older ppl taste different if you give them head? I'm curious cus one made me an offer.

9 Comments
2024/10/29
03:00 UTC

368

Told Wife I was Bisexual

After being married for 27 years I told my wife I was bisexual.

You know what she said, “O that’s okay plenty of people are bisexual” she gave me a massive kiss and a cuddle and asked me what I wanted for dinner. There was me worried for weeks about telling her and she simply loves me for who I am. How cool is that!

59 Comments
2024/10/28
21:58 UTC

2

This is kinda a game, no

So a brief summary person a (me, f) tells person b(f) they are into them. They'd always joked about it but person a finally realised they really did feel that way. Person a gets ghosted via text re:their profession and let's it go.

Cut forward to when they see each other irl person b gets quite touchy. I've never had someone caress my arm and look me in the eyes like that. Hugging as well. Etc. It's nice but person a thinks not much of.

Person b asks to hang out but platonically (in my mind) after this. One on one. Sure. Then person b avoids making the actual plan.

Isn't this just kinda a game. Tbh don't even know if person b rolls that way. Also was I reading into the affectionateness? That said for me is we've known each other a while and that's the first time we've had more than a quick hug. It was really cute, friendly but also romantic. It felt good but I was overwhelmed by it and confused.

UPDATE: Last night decided I'm just gonna pull back. And that I want someone as sure as I am. I have a lot of flaws but one thing I get is im very enthusiastic (and optimistic). For my own closure I wrote them a text. But also just to set a clear boundary. That if we bump into each other etc. Obviously wish I could have this Convo in person but they dodge me or make the plan then skip. I've been hung up on them for a very long time...even while I was seeing someone. They were there when I went through something horrific. But I think that I deserve more.

I guess I hung on for myself but also I live in a very conservative context so I understand not everyone will even know how to go about this. But I'm also just. I want love. It'll have it's limits with another w cos of my circumstances but I've still seen it work and at least, look, wonderful.

Thanks for the advise and thoughts. I haven't been on Reddit in a while but this was really helpful.💕

5 Comments
2024/10/28
19:25 UTC

0

Bi Curious in Korea

Trying to find other bi curious guys like me in South Korea (especially if you’re into str8porn).

2 Comments
2024/10/28
14:32 UTC

3

Bi curious M

Looking for Bi friends around Maldives

4 Comments
2024/10/27
10:40 UTC

40

One more knows.

Today I went to get my hair trimmed. I'm growing it out again to later donate. I'm a 53 yr old male that is Bi. The lady I go to have been on off topics before. Like her saying that when she was younger, she messed with girls. Then it happened. I blurted out that I went both ways. She looked at me and said she never would have figured that I would be that way. I was walking on cloud 9 and still am.

10 Comments
2024/10/26
22:44 UTC

56

What’s the funniest NSFW thing that’s happened in your dating life because you or your partner was bi?

Mine was that I dated a bi girl in college and while we were making out she was rubbing the top of her thigh between my legs, putting pressure on my taint. She told me later that she forgot that the ‘knee trick’ didn’t work on AMAB guys.

I also knew a bi friend who rarely dated girls, he was so used to being with guys that he asked his date if she needed to ‘get ready’ because he forgot for a second that AFAB girls don’t have to prep to bottom.

11 Comments
2024/10/25
22:35 UTC

37

Anyone else have this happen?

Hi, I'm getting close to my wits end, it is so unbelievably difficult to meet another actual bisexual guy.

We are a married couple, we're both bi, we have had partners come and go over the years, but I swear, I have yet to meet another actual "bi" guy. Every time, like, without fail, someone will say something like, "yeah for sure I'd like to be with both of you!" All enthusiastic, and then when things start to progress, turns out they aren't really into bi stuff, or they're on the fence, or they're wanting to explore, Mayne slowly some other time, regardless of how specific we are, and it's pretty fucking specific, It turns into "I'll gladly take a shot at your wife, but this bisexual thing, well, turns out, insert bullshit here"

Like every time. Has anyone else had this happen? Get to know someone over a period of weeks or months, have them repeatedly say the same thing, video chats, all is well, when we finally meet its like I'm offering them a cup of coffee while I go sit in the corner, Not like I'm sharing the best thing I've ever been a part of.

For clarity, I am deeply in love with my wife, and she loves me just as much, it's been 11 wonderful years, and I wouldn't change a thing, she's my soulmate, and changed my life forever instantly when I met her.

As I say, we're both bi, and to ask another to deny a part of themselves just isn't how we roll. We want each other to have everything and anything that they want. We're pretty open, we like to be straight up, and in response it's usually some underhanded workaround,

I'm really hoping that everyone else has had a much more positive experience and that it's just a me thing, Or are we really akin to some kind or endangered species? Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks yall for the time.

106 Comments
2024/10/25
01:57 UTC

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