Those who are dating a partner who speaks a different language natively than your own, do you feel the need or want to learn thier language?

Do some feel like it’s hard to express your true feelings, humor, personality in a language you had to learn?

I(27 white M) met an amazing 29 year old black woman several days ago and I need some advice on what and what not to do differently seeing that I’ve never not dated white women. We’re both separated/ divorced and have kids as well.

Hello everyone. Hope you awesome couples have a great valentines Day this year. What are your plans and what gifts are you getting for your significant other. Please comment so I may steal your ideas. Thank you.

Hello. I am a 25 year old female in Kenya and I’m seeking a partner. I’m often in the house and dating apps aren’t just my thing. Any other leads or suggestions? Thanks

My Indian colleague married a hapa girl 15 years back inspite of stiff disapproval (for marrying brown man) from her asian mother.Then his MIL limited her contacts with them for 5 years.Same MIL enthusiastically supported her elder daughter's marriage with a white man.

In a weird twist of fate elder daughter gave birth to an almost asian looking son and this girl gave birth to almost white looking daughter. So 25% white baby had more europoid features than 75% white baby.Then his MIL suddenly started becoming more warm towards them, started visiting them and baby sitting their daughter.

Last month his MIL died of cancer.Her entire fortune was willed for her half indian grand daughter, leaving nothing for her elder daughter(who married white).

Has anyone experienced differential treatment from your parents or in laws based on the baby looks?

How do you guys handle people making comments about your baby's features??

I'm 1/2 black 1/2 white and my sons father is white. Our son came out very white and people seemed to be stunned 😭they keep making comments.

I know it's a natural observation but I feel awkward. For example, my black friend said " I can't wait till he gets more melanin" which I know is her way of processing her uncomfortable feelings about race, but UGH!

I’m not sure if this is a silly question to ask, but when selecting photos for your profile, have you found that including pictures with friends who are of the ethnicity you are interested makes much of a difference?

For instance say if you are really into Asian men or women or black men or women. Having people from that demographic gives you a greater chance of matches? This can go for the other way too. So would you be more willing to match if you know said person has people in his circle of friends that are the same race as you.

I am a black man (20) and recentely got out of a very bad relationship. Few days ago I met this white girl(23). The thing is: she has only ever dated black guys and I have only dated black girls. I dont know how to flirt with her (I dont know if im her type of black man) and I dont wanna fumble her because she's the coolest/hottest girl i've ever met. Any advice?

Hello there, I am thrilled to be here.

Please bare with me as I navigate American culture as a newbie in this country.

So be patient. English is not even my first language.

I am south American of mixed origins. I have mostly European roots, also African and Native Amerindian roots.

He is European, from Germany.

We have been together for 17 years, over the course of 17 years we have lived in six different countries, spread across Europe, also Canada, Colombia and Mexico. Currently we live in the US, it is in the US where I realize we are Interracial. Before that I never thought about race...

Over our 17 years together, we have talked about social classes, cultural differences, differences in countries, religions, everything you can imagine, except race. It is just something that either was always extremely unimportant for us to even notice, or the US... the nation that made us see we are interracial, is just a bit too obsessed with labeling humans by color.

Being a biologist I can tell you race is not part of human evolution, it is 100% invented and coined and created by society.

It is just weird that in the US this matters? I do not know, I just never noticed it in continental Europe, in Canada no one ever focused on it, and in Colombia people didnt even registered it at least when they talked to us.... in the US however it has been mentioned to us, as if it is a good thing. It is just that is not a good or bad thing because since we are not Americans, this idea of dividing people into political labels like black, white, latino is frankly culturally irrelevant to us?

I mean, is it bad if we as a couple decide to continue our life together without getting those race related labels that seem to matter so much to many Americans involved into our lives?

Or is there something I need to discuss and care about? We are not Americans, so please explain to our non American brains, why do we need to acknowledge, discuss, and identity as races and as an interracial couple?

We do acknowledge that we come from two different cultures. But the skin color coding thing is kinda weird to us as non Americans.

Thanks for putting up with this post. I just cant explain well, how the US concept of racial labeling makes me feel. I am getting used to it, he is also getting used to the fact he is white, he sees himself as German, Bavarian, Munchener, European.... the whole white guy is pretty odd to him.

Be intentional about your relationship and prioritize time together ❤️

Edited for SP and clarity

Hello there! Greetings from a couple who met in Philadelphia and made our way as students to Toronto, Canada. :-)

As a little background, we are both energetic people and social! We both require diversity of thought and a little bit of healthy challenge in our social settings, which is why we felt it best to try Canada for healthcare and 1 million other reasons that we liked when we experienced it!

We are roughly the same age—mid-30s—and I am, for all intents and purposes, white. I grew up in America, upstate New York, and she grew up in Camden, New Jersey. She is half Black, half white.

We talk openly about many of these things, which I think is the key to a lot of our success and positive communication. We obviously talk a lot about having kids, but there is one thing that I’ve realized that I see becoming more positive. It just makes me a little insecure, and I’ve openly told her this.

I was lucky to have very open-minded parents when it came to respecting people and their race, religion, and origin. Obviously, I’ve learned infinitely more dating a Black partner over the years—spoken and unspoken. But when it comes to the subject of what happens when we have a kid, if this kid has special needs—no issues—everything is great under the sun. But there’s something that really concerns me that I’ve realized has affected a lot of the Black Philadelphians that I have dated. They don’t want to have a gay baby. And sometimes, when I bring that up as a possibility, the response is pretty alarming.

I’ve tried through exposure over the past couple of years, and I see a positive awareness and changing comfortability with the issue, but not yet to the point where I would feel safe as a child who is gay with a mother who still harbored those feelings. I personally am infinitely thankful for the LGBTQ community because they have always accepted me and my friends—not necessarily in this category, although pretty weird, ha—and I think it’s a valuable lesson to teach our children.

I’m just struggling with this one insecurity, and I am openly talking with her about it, although I can’t force somebody to be more comfortable at their own pace. Please, any suggestions or stories would feel great. We are, I feel, a pretty strong match and have built some pretty incredible things together. :-)

Thank you for understanding my style in writing and language choice. I am by no means an academic scholar of interracial studies, so I apologize if I have overlooked some language or tone. I am really trying here! I know she is too. My best to everyone, and keep up the love!

I’m a Black female into caucasian men but I am scared to like profiles on dating apps because I am not sure if they like black women. I mean I guess it’s like shooting my shot but it hurts especially if you don’t match🥲. I just have no luck

Hi,

Me and my fiance (I’m African American and he is Caucasian) have been together for years and have 3 boys together. We plan to merry in April of this year, but with all the laws in the US being turned it’s scaring me. Due to past talks about banning interracial marriages, I am legit starting to freak out. I was thinking of just doing a shotgun wedding at the courthouse and still have our big wedding in April but idk. I feel so torn and pissed I even have to think about this.

Does anybody else fear that is going to occur with everything going on?

What would you recommend for a 39M in the DFW area who is looking to connect with black women?

Hey, guysssssss. 25 year old fully black woman here. Let me start off by saying I love all races of men — I joke that I love all flavors of the rainbow. Even talked to a Chinese guy once. 😂 One of my ex boyfriends was of Polish descent and was white. He was my first ever interracial relationship. Things were great until they weren’t, a tale as old as time. But, while we were dating, I got absurd comments from my loved ones. For context, I’ve always been highly intelligent. 4.3 GPA in high school, did International Baccalaureate classes, played violin, and captain of the cheer team at a predominantly white school. I’m currently a nursing student. I’ve always been a high achiever.

But anyway, back to the story. My loved ones would make certain comments that made me cringe like “I always saw you with a white man”, which is crazy to me because I have always had black boyfriends until I met my ex. The comments always made me super uncomfortable because it made me feel like because I wasn’t your “stereotypical black woman” that people felt like I was too good for Black men. It honestly makes me not want to date interracially again even though I’m interested in having another white boyfriend (my most current ex was Black).

How does one handle these comments? My own mom made a bet years ago that when I left for college that I would bring home a white man. I didn’t — I brought home a man who had Caribbean origins and she never liked him. Help!

Hi! I’m a man in my mid 20s who isn’t exclusively interested in black womem, but has a preference for them and I’ve found more black women have been interested in me than other races.

Black woman white man couples, where did you all meet your love?

Black woman here. Open to the idea of being with a white man - I feel like I can find my ideal type in a white man in terms of interests, not wanting kids, and intellect. (I’m a nerd) However I never seem to find a white man who also believes in God. My religion is important to me however I want what I want. And the last thing I wanna do is settle.

My husband is from South Korea and due to being apart while we wait for a visa I’m lucky enough to visit South Korea. I have been 4 times prior and I’m going back this upcoming April and August. I’ll be going back and forth until we get the visa which will most likely take 1.5 year. It’s hard being apart but I make the most of it in South Korea. My husband and I figured we should explore Japan since we have the chance. We went to Osaka this past December, we’re going to Kyoto this upcoming April, and we’re thinking of seeing Tokyo in August or December.

I really love South Korea! I love the culture, food, people, and all the beautiful places. South Korea is absolutely wonderful. My friend’s boyfriend is from Greece and she visits Greece quite often. I know she loves it there like how I love South Korea. Whenever my friend mentions Greece she always finds the need to bring down South Korea. She would say that the food isn’t good in South Korea like it is in Greece and I would tell her the food is different in both places. I was telling her how much fun it is in South Korea and she said “I’m sure Greece is more fun besides you never left NY until recently”. I took it upon myself to list all the fun things there is to do in South Korea. She also invited my husband and I to visit Greece with her and her boyfriend sometime. I said that sounds great and she said “it will be much better than the typicalness of South Korea and Japan”.

I don’t even know why she’s trying to compare two opposite countries? It’s sooo weird to me and very random. She even wants to visit Japan and China. But according to her South Korea isn’t as special as China and since her boyfriend visited South Korea for work he told her that he finds it boring. I visit South Korea quite often so I would know if it’s boring compared to her boyfriend that was there for a 3 day work trip. She even told me that if this visa process doesn’t work and I move there she can’t see me living there. I don’t understand why she always finds the need to bash South Korea. She knows how much I love it there and how special it is so me. I’m wondering if anyone here has advice of what to say or do? I can’t figure out why she’s trying to compare these two vastly different places.

Does anyone feel like you are constantly having to justify to your friends and your community that you are not betraying them by dating a white man? As a muslim WOC I feel I have to make it clear that I did not seek this out - I just met this person at work and they have turned out to be the most caring, invested, kindest person. With him being a muslim revert I feel better since that is one of the most important things our relationships should be anchored upon - but I feel I am easily influenced by the opinions of others. My friends like him but feel he does not have the cultural mannerisms desi men have and that we inherently have a deep distrust of white men. Which I understand and was apprehensive of in the beginning myself, and after multiple rejections and getting to know him, I feel there is more to him than being white and he truly does have a wonderful heart and will take care of me and our future family iA. But does this feeling ever go away? Do you ever get to the point where you don't care what people think of you? Or should I put more weight into the opinions of my friends - who only see that I am happy with him but do not know him much beyond that?

For the people who's parents were against the relationship? Was it worth all the pain and chaos?

I know for sure that I want to be with him and that he is worth it but I would like to know other peoples stories about this

So I have a friend who is basically southern Asian of Indian descent and I noticed that most of her friends are black and some may be mixed. She’s she wears braids , grills and talks in slang and she mostly sleeps with black men. She asked me if what she is doing is wrong because some of her friends have called her out on it me personally you know I do think some of the things she does is a bit strange but if she wants to wear braids, cornrows and grills and all this stuff there’s nothing that I can really do about it as a black person, I just think it’s strange when people do this like I’m black and I date white men I even prefer them but I don’t seem to morph myself into a white woman or at least try to present as one. Why do you non-black black people do this? Is it fetishism ? Admiration ? Do they wish they were black but without our struggles ?

I’m so confused. I can’t tell someone how to live their life or be offended by it but it is so odd.