TW: Living child

I’m the mother of two sons. 

My second son’s name is Noah. I was nervous to be a family with two boys, obsessively worried neither of them would call me when they got older. I even cried about it. After we shockingly found out at the 20 week anatomy scan that he wasn’t going to make it, I remember picking up my first son from daycare and saw a mother with two young boys walking out. I can’t describe the ache of how badly I now wanted that future.

He was born on July 30th, and he lived for just a little over 90 minutes. We didn’t know if we’d have any time with him at all, so we are grateful for what we had. I did my best to sing my favorite lullaby to him, we both let him know how much he was loved. I held his small hands. I told him how much he mattered. He took his last breath in my arms, with my husband right next to us. I realized later that I only kissed him after he was gone, which bothers me still.

I wanted to share this because I don’t ever want to feel like I’m hiding Noah. So this really isn’t for anything but to feel unburdened from keeping his story to only a few.

He was here. He lived. He was significant. We love and miss him. 

I’ll start this out by saying it’s been five years since I lost my son. I’m not sure if this would have brought the same comfort with less passage of time.

I’ve been listening to the Anne of Green Gables books at night to help me fall asleep for a while now. I find them very calming and soothing. Tonight I finally reached Anne’s House of Dreams, which was one of my favorite of the series, but I encountered a story line that was so much more meaningful to me now than the last time I read it.

Anne lost her first-born daughter shortly after birth. I hadn’t completely forgotten about that, but listening to it more was so much more striking to me. So many of her thoughts and feelings struck home with me now. The idea that the author wrote of an experience so similar to mine over 100 years ago brought me comfort. It reminded me that this is something generations of women have lived through. And the fact that Lucy Maud Montgomery wrote something I could relate to so well, so many years ago, was such a comfort to me. I just wanted to share in case it might help someone else.

I been going through the... mourning and I been hitting a lot of anger last 48 hours. There was nothing anyone could do... and it was at 38 weeks I was supposed to have a baby... we got a vasectomy at 20 weeks cause everything was fine.... os I don't even get to have a rainbow baby... and husband has being a jerk and honestly... atm i hate him. He got a vasectomy he wanted it... why couldn't he have waited.... but noooo 3 kids was a lot well I didn't get my baby.... and now I can't.. and I'm so mad!

Sorry to cross post from ttcafterstillbirth

I had been TTC for a few months after my 33w stillbirth in April. At the end of September after an IUI, I got my positive. I couldn’t believe it. I spent the first few weeks feeling mostly good about it, my hcg levels were doubling appropriately. I had a scan at 5w6d showing a gestational sac, yolk sac, fetal pole but no heartbeat. I was assured it was too early. 9 days after that, my second scan where I should’ve been 7w1d showed a fetal pole measuring 6w2d at most with a strong heartbeat. I was told to be optimistic and come back in a week. At my 8w1d ultrasound, there was no heartbeat. I have to go through the process of miscarriage today. I woke up feeling like I felt in the first few weeks of losing my son. I can’t believe this is happening. This baby was going to be my rainbow, this baby was going to have the same due date as my stillborn (if we induced early).

I am shattered. I don’t think I can come back from this now. How can I keep going? I made it so far and keep getting pushed back to square 1. It took us a year to conceive my son who was stillborn, 4-5 cycles for this one. 2 of which I think* were chemicals. I just can’t keep going like this. My husband who has been my rock, this has completely broken his spirit. We are entirely broken.

Anyone else go through this and go on to have a living child? I was so hopeful before but now so hopeless.

I am 2weeks ish postpartum I had my daughter October 15th I used to sit and cry everyday all day long and then the day came I had her and I’ve been sort of numb to the situation I feel like I cried so much there’s no more tears and it makes me sad I’ve been waiting to pick up her ashes which they told me Friday or Monday but now I have to wait for the urn to arrive because I wanted it engraved and the man didn’t get it on time I suppose. I don’t know what it is , I just hope I’m honoring my daughter and that’s she’s okay . I keep calling out to god and looking for a sign but I’m not getting one . I set a nightstand next to me with her pictures hung and I’m going to go buy flowers and make it pretty every chance I get . I just feel so disconnected.

I had Inevitable Abortion 19 weeks 1 day AOG, Non-septic, Non-induced; G1P0 (0010)

My placenta has been tested and below is the result.

DIAGNOSIS: Placenta, Curettage: IMMATURE PLACENTAL TISSUE WITH FEATURES SUGGESTIVE OF ACCELERATED VILLOUS MATURATION. (Please see microscopic description).

GROSS DESCRIPTION: Specimen received fixed in formalin consists of several dark-brown, irregular, soft to spongy tissue fragments labeled as "placenta," admixed with blood clots, with an aggregate diameter of 13.0 × 11.0 x 4.0 cm. Representative sections taken. Block two cassettes (A1 and A2).

MICROSCOPIC DESCRIPTION: Microscopic examination shows immature villi admixed with a significant proportion of small villi. Increased intervillous fibrin is also noted.

Could you kindly help explain what these means? I am still left with no answer as to what happened. I had light bleeding and cramping before heading out to the hospital. Then at the hospital, my water gushed out. The doctor performed internal examination, my cervix was fully dilated and small fetal parts are already out. The baby still has a heartbeat using doppler, and even after delivery. Sadly, he wasn’t able to survive thereafter.

Please shed some thoughts. Appreciate the help.

I've had two second trimester losses, so I like to put out pictures of my ultrasounds with the food I craved and some of the gifts we were given in pregnancy. I'm not Mexican (my husband is but never celebrated Dia de los Muertos until after our first loss last year), but I really appreciate the opportunity to take everything out, look at it, and feel connected again to my babies. Thought I'd share in case it inspired others to do something that felt meaningful to you and your family.

Not even two months ago I lost what I thought was going to be the love of my life, Ethan. His dad is foreign and really seemed to not want us but we communicate now and then. I feel really silly for being intimate with him again after he was so nasty to me during my pregnancy and after. The man has treated me like I’m worthless.

Prior to getting pregnant I asked to be alone to restructure my life and he felt abandoned and we’ve never been able to get past that. It’s like I’ve latched on to the idea of us being a family now and the hardest part is letting any of it go. I wanted my baby SO SO bad. After speaking with a lady of his culture she told me that he is just keeping in contact just in case he needs me to help him become a citizen. It’s a sad reality I have to face. I hate myself for being so naive, so silly so vulnerable and so irresponsible with the life of love.

He randomly calls just to say hi and how well he’s doing for himself now. I feel so guilty, weak, replaceable and worthless. I have to just get over it and move on with my life now. I hate my life now more than ever but I have to just keep trying to get over it and move on.

Random rants happen from time to time cause life sucks.

Thanks for reading

We lost our son 11 weeks and 3 days ago, born at 25 weeks he lived for 5 hours and 15 minutes passed into heaven in my arms.

I've not heard from anyone. Only a couple of people. I've not had a single text from my mother in law ( not that I want one as she can be, well.. a mother in law but she was texting non stop throughout my pregnancy and pushing in on subjects like babys names etc ) but it feels like I'm just alone and everyone's moved on.

While im slowly dying on the inside, honestly if it wasn't for the kind people at my church no one else acknowledges me says anything or checks in.

Not that I want my phone to be blowing up like it was when he was born and passed away but I've never felt more alone.

I think I make most people uncomfortable now.

It's making me just want to scream as my due date is approaching I've baby stuff locked away in a cupboard I don't know what to do with.

We're trying for another baby and when i do eventually fall pregnant I don't know should I keep all that baby stuff for another baby or keep it in his memory, or what to do with it.

Pregnant people seem to be everywhere pregnancy announcements, my friend is due the exact same day as my sons due dare and its killing me, not that I want anything to happen to that baby, I don't, I'm just reminded what I should have, I should have got to take my son home and place him in his mosses basket not in a white coffin and now all I have is a even smaller white box with his ashes inside.

Today I went into Lululemon to buy a pair of leggings. I started talking to this lovely girl named Ness, I told her how the last time I was in here was just over a year ago and I was gobsmacked that I barely fit in the size 16 AUS 12 US leggings, and that I actually would have been more comfortable in the 18 AUS but I refused to buy that size.

I told her how I’ve lost just over 25 kilos so I’m not entirely sure on sizing. She brought into the change room a size 12 & 14, I tried the AUS 12 US 8 first and they were too big, she said “are you sure you lost 25? It seems you lost much more!” I then quickly mentioned just how overweight I was, and that I’d lost my daughter last year, and how ashamed I was of myself, my weight, and not having my baby. She asked how far along I was, I said 6 months. I could see her eyes starting to tear up, but I’ve spoken about this so many times and cried that much about it that I’ve now become a robot. I fit perfectly in the size AUS 10 leggings, she had a giggle that I was two sizes smaller than I thought I would have been, and how proud of myself I should be.

When I came out to the counter to pay, she said “I’m giving you these leggings for free, I won’t have you pay. I’m a mother myself, I’m so proud of you”

I burst into tears, she cried with me. Some people truly are so kind and beautiful, I was genuinely shocked. some light in a tunnel of dark, a moment I’ll always remember. Thankyou.

Knowing that the baby was going to be born before Halloween, my partner and I talked about dressing our little one up :) . I’ve been hiding in my home, trying my best not to see everyone’s’ children. All cute in their costumes and things.

My partner vented to me and told me that he saw so many kids today. Everytime he saw a family he would be struck with sadness because he thought that was going to be us. When he saw a father and a son together, it made him even sadder. I don’t know why somehow I feel like it’s my fault that I caused this sadness. I kept saying how sorry I was that he had to see all of that. Kids being happy. Parents being excited for their kids.

I miss who him and I use to be before our son died.

This morning I was crying because yet another Halloween is being spent without my baby girl. This would’ve only been her second Halloween. But her first being able to walk, to clumsily grab for a candy bar from the neighbors, and have a taste. I grieved missing out on that today. Last year I missed out on Halloween completely. My husband and I kept the lights off and hid away. This year something compelled me to go all out with decorating. For a moment earlier today, I regretted it. I just wanted to hide away again. But we decided to go through with it, and it actually lifted my spirits so much. We laughed all night scaring kids and their parents with our spooky set up. We even oohed and ahhed over some of the cute little ones. It felt good to share in the joy and spread the joy. This is grief. A whirlwind of emotions. Sadness coexisting with happy. Never easy but somehow we do it. Wherever you are at on your journey, I’m thinking about you tonight and wishing you had your little pumpkin in your arms

It’s Halloween and the streets are filled with adorable children dressed in their costumes. I lost my daughter at 24weeks over 2 months ago, I would have been starting my maternity leave from work on Nov 1… but instead I have just returned to work after taking time to grieve her loss. I was planning on dressing up as Juno for Halloween since I would’ve been very pregnant but instead I worked late, came home and had a glass of wine in my pajamas.

This isn’t the way the rest of my year was supposed to go and oddly enough I am not doing too bad, I wasn’t too triggered by the kids all dressed up trick or treating - instead I felt a little hope that one day I could be taking my little one around to do the same. I’ll wait for that day to come, longer than I hoped to but with positivity that I’ll be lucky to be a mom (of 2) one day.

To the loss parents struggling this Halloween, Cheers.

We are sitting at a bar hiding from Trick or Treaters. My son’s Halloween outfit sits in his empty crib. He would’ve been just over 2 months old.

Take care of yourselves.

🍻

My husband is my absolute most favorite person on this planet, and having to watch him go through this is destroying me. We found out our very much wanted and loved son passed at 33 weeks gestation after a “normal” and uneventful pregnancy. I got induced Tuesday, delivered him yesterday and now am in the hospital until tomorrow on IV antibiotics because they’re worried about sepsis. We met our son and he is absolutely perfect. Neither of us can stop crying. I hate that I’m going through this but I’m as “okay” as I can be, and it’s killing me watching my husband go through this. He’s shattered by losing our son, but he’s been extremely worried about me medically and having to be by my side during the scary medical things while he knows we’ve already lost our son is breaking him. I’m the one on the hospital bed but I can’t imagine how helpless he feels.

I just never thought this would happen to me, or us. I don’t think anyone ever thought they’d be in this group. I don’t know if I’m venting or looking for advice or what - I just wanted to tell someone how I feel. I love my son and I love my husband so much - I just love my boys and am so devastated.

I’m not religious but I’m thinking of everyone who has gone through this in the past, and everyone who will unfortunately will go through this in the future.

Today, Halloween, is the day my first child was due. I spent months talking about my perfect Halloween baby girl. Instead, today is full of tears, questions, grief for the life my husband and I don’t get to have with her, grief for the life she doesn’t get to experience. It hit me last night all over again that she should be here. We found out she died on 10/10. I was exactly 37 weeks into an uncomplicated, easy pregnancy. There’s no explanation as to why this happened to her.

The doctor was going to schedule me for an induction on 10/28. I don’t know why I repressed that memory but it hit me hard last night that if things went the way they were supposed to, there’s a possibility I would have been induced on 10/28, she would actually be here, with me, coming home to the house we bought for her, on her due date. I’m scared to enter November without my baby girl. I’m scared to live with this pain for the rest of my life. I’m scared to endure Halloween after Halloween without my Halloween baby. What a nightmare my life has turned out to be.

I miss you, Melody. I miss you so much. I didn’t know how badly I wanted to be a Mom until I found out I was pregnant with you. The greatest surprise, to the biggest heartbreak, of my entire life. I love you and miss you more than I ever knew was physically possible.

Does it ever get better? Does the pain ever go away? What do you guys do to feel better and keep pushing?

I feel like I am drowning in my pain with the loss of my son. All I ever wanted in this life was to be a mother. I don’t understand why my body failed me. I don’t understand the medical reason? I work in the medical field and I feel so much blame for not listening to my body or just for being uneducated. I feel so much blame for questioning God.

WHAT WAS THE REASON FOR MY LOSS?

Why does it hurt so much???

I was due to induce my first baby ever yesterday. I lost her on October 3rd. She was 36 weeks old, still born the day of her final ultra sound. She had been moving totally normally the night before. What a nightmare. Today I should have been holding her in my arms. I am 38 years old and had waited and planned and really been so intentional about creating her. And now to have her gone… an autopsy was done and multiple doctors have reviewed it and didn’t see anything wrong. It’s just so dark and so devastating. I don’t understand my path anymore.

I feel like I am losing my mind, honestly.

I lost my baby due to ectopic pregnancy. Miscarriage began from the 25th of May 2024 and had prolonged bleeding. Final blood test for HcG monitoring on the 23rd of June was considered negative. My period took almost 12 weeks to come back and my cycle returning in itself has been hell.

In all of this btw, my best friend had her baby. And finally, I saw her last weekend. She is beautiful and so precious... I leaned into my desire to love and nurture, I fed her, I cared for her, played with her... I did everything I could to support my friend, and to be a good auntie.

But I tell you... It has sent my grief and OCD into a spiral. It's made me long for my baby that I've lost even more and is more of a reality check as if my period returning wasn't a reality check in itself. I just feel undeserving, and unworthy. I had one job and my body couldn't do it. I'm angry, I'm jealous, I am so sad... I try to be happy and to find positives but I'm just so heartbroken...

My baby should be in my belly, growing and ready to meet the world in January. But they're not. All I have left is a box (a beautifully done box btw) with my positive test in it... That is all I have left to hold on to.

TW - mention of living children

A bit of a brief back story: In Jan 2020, my best friend's 2nd daughter, my perfect, beautiful niece,, died during birth at 41+4 weeks. And then, 10 months later in November that same year, another dear friend went in for her elective c section at 39 weeks, with her 3rd child, 2nd son. It was while she was on the table about to begin that they discovered baby had died. Her gorgeous boy. I am always with my best friend on my niece's anniversary, but my other friend lived a few hours away. Now however she has moved overseas, and she has been having a really difficult time, things haven't been easy for her with the move, and now baby's 4th anniversary is coming up. I want to send her something especially special and meaningful to her this year, she knows how much I love her, but I want something that reminds her how loved she is, and how much baby is always remembered by me when she looks at it, but I don't know what. Any ideas please?

My newborn died five years ago and yesterday was her birthday. My family members, relatives, friends and neighbors all reach out to wish her a happy birthday and it’s so thoughtful. But my husband’s family said nothing. Only his father and step mother.

He has 5 siblings who he is close with and many step siblings as well. They didn’t even send a quick text to him. His mom sent a text about an upcoming trip we have, but didn’t say a word about her granddaughter.

I’m infuriated about this. I want to call her out on it but I don’t want to go anything out of anger. I just don’t know how to navigate this situation. I already have many issues with her, but this feels so unacceptable.

Can anyone drop the link to the dad discord for infant loss? I’m trying to find it for my husband. Thank you.

Tw: stillbirth

Our first baby was stillborn at 6 months a little over a year ago. I've always wanted to be a mom and I'll still always be her mommy but it sucks not also having a living kid and it feels like the only thing I really want to do in life. I think about her everyday and always wish to be able to give her a sibling. She was planned but sometimes I was even worried about stillbirth too and I mentioned it to my bf.

He said that would really suck going through pregnancy and then having to go through that, but that everything would be okay. He also said before the pregnancy, since I have pcos we could keep trying and see a professional if we needed to. He used to say that we could probably try to have another kid in January, then he said a year but now since that happened he thinks about having kids differently and he doesn't want to for a really long time. I feel more anxious about it, especially since I have pcos and would rather have kids while I'm still in my 20s, I'm about to turn 24 really soon and he'll be 31 in December.

He doesn't really like talking about what happened much and he said he tries not to think about it, but when I get really upset about it and also not being pregnant, he tells me to try to push my feelings aside. I know I probably can't change his mind on the timeline but it feels really unfair and I think it's the only thing that'll help us heal and not feel jealous of other families or like I can't be around babies. I was wondering how you guys Cope/coped through a similar situation?

TW: Birth/Loss Trauma flashback

This post is about postpartum sexual activity and the feelings after loss.

Want to keep this brief as I’ve already spent a lot of time posting about the loss of our son. He was 20 weeks old with a sudden amniotic sack rupture.

My husband had been flirty all day today and mentioned trying to have some sexy time tonight. I’ve been pretty game and feel physically back to normal after labor.

Well tonight comes and I was not prepared for the sudden trauma and flashbacks to my painful breech birth labor once a hand was put down there.

It brought back the entire experience of having the male doctors hand inside of me over the course of hours trying to help guide our son out and make the already horrible process faster. It brought back the memories and despair that I thought I had started to smooth over at the edges. But no, it was all right there waiting for me.

I did not find it sexy, or even welcome. It was absolutely awful. I feel even worse because I didn’t say anything to my husband until afterwards because I didn’t want to ruin the first moment of us trying to rekindle our bedroom life since the loss. I feel like I betrayed myself and should have said something sooner.

What are your sexual experiences post loss? Is this something that fades with time, or is birth trauma and sexual experience something that needs therapy. I’m honestly at a loss.

Thank so much.

We lost our first baby, Benjamin, on Oct 12th. E. coli infection and then sepsis seem to be the cause, but we are still waiting for the autopsy report. The pregnancy was smooth; no issues, but now he's gone. We never even got to hold him when he was alive. We don't know how he got infected. My wife showed no symptoms and Benjamin showed no signs of distress. We had no warning. Our OB said she's never seen anything like it in 24 years. I want answers, but I don't think I'm going to get any.

My wife and I are starting to heal I think, but I know it's going to be a long road. We have so many loving friends and family members. We're really blessed and it's amazing, but our hearts are still so heavy. We're going to go to counseling soon, and, as strange as it sounds, I'm looking forward to it. I know we need to talk to a professional to help us with our grief.

I don't know why I'm posting all this right now. I just can't sleep tonight. It's my birthday and I hate it. I'm glad I'm alive and I love my wife and this beautiful life we're building together, but there's a hole in my chest that feels like it will never be filled again. My wife told me she got me a present and I love that she wanted to. I love that she still thinks about stuff like that despite what she is going through. I love her so much and just want her to be ok. I can tell she feels the same way about me and that's a wonderful thing. I wouldn't have blamed her if she shut herself off from everyone, even me, but she hasn't. I want to shut off towards everyone sometimes, but I won't; especially if she doesn't. I watched her give all she had to bring Benjamin into this world and she didn't get to have him. I think the least I can do is give her the best of me.

So I have this friend who is kind but is kinda insensitive. I lost my 5 month old healthy baby to SUID when he rolled over by himself to his belly and neither roll back nor make any sound to alarm us. I kept torturing myself with guilt and kept asking what happened. Why did they say it'd be fine if baby can roll by themselves??? I always put him on his back, and always turn him to be on his back if I see him roll to his belly by himself. Most Babies always roll to sleep on their bellies if they can already roll. And I keep blaming myself because I didn't see it and didn't prevent it! We didn't have an autopsy so not sure what the reason was. And I tried to tell myself that it wasn't my fault so I can keep living.

But this friend, when she met me for the first time after his passing, she asked about his position when we found him. And she said we should have co-slept in the same bed so we know if he was in trouble. It was so traumatic to hear that. I said babies also passed away from co-sleeping, and at 5 month old, my baby was able to roll and would have woken up if everything else was normal with him. But she kept making me feel like it's my fault. And when she talks to me, she said for multiple times "I wish for nothing but my child's safety". Sure, so insensitive to rub it in my face. Wish for it in secret, not to me! Why are you telling me? And she keeps saying: "I always do the good things and never harms anyone to leave good virtue (good karama) for my children). What the f? Do you mean I did something wrong?

So I tried not to talk to her and ignored her chat once. But she texted me again and asked me "anything new?", trying to ask if I'm pregnant. So I say I am. And she said "this time don't sleep train him and co-sleep with him". What the hell? If there is something I must do then I must have known about it and no need to hear it from her. I said directly (again) that co-sleeping is even more dangerous and this time I will use an owlet on my baby to monito. I'm so tired of having to justify myself. I regret telling her about his position. That's why I cut off social because I know people just want to satisfy their curiosity and judge. Now I feel so bad again. She ruined my day.

I haven’t posted on here since I joined and I feel the need to tell my story for me and my daughter Gracelyn.

Well I found out I was pregnant in February on Valentine’s Day. Because I’m poly I was scared to tell my boyfriend cause I didn’t know how his wife would take it. She took it horribly. We contemplated getting an abortion but I couldn’t go through with it. So we found out at about 11 weeks I was having a little girl. At 12 weeks I started to have heavy bleeding and ended up in the ER 3 times that week. I had a subcorionic hematoma. Baby girl was fine but I was put on bed rest basically. So I took about a month off work. Well by 18 weeks I was back at work and every thing seemed fine. At 20 weeks I found out I was having issues with my cervix staying long and closed. Which did seem to resolve because it stopped changing. The same day I was told this I was 23 weeks. But once I hit 23 weeks I went into preterm labor with bleeding again. I was at work when it happened. I was hospitalized for 3 days then released cause the bleeding stopped and the contractions didn’t come back. Well at 23 weeks on July 1st I went back in for the same thing but this time it was worse. I had a partial placental abruption. I had to have 4 blood transfusions and an emergency c-section because of it. My daughter was given all the life saving measures to try and save her but ultimately lived for 1 hour 43 minutes and died in my arms. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do in my life. Here’s a picture of us the day after she passed.

I lost my daughter shortly after she was born, 40w exactly on her due date, this summer. It’s been four months. I miss her all the time. I know another child would not “fix it” but I can’t help but ache to start trying again. 💔 I want a living child so badly. After a 12w miscarriage and now this. How do you all keep going? I feel like nothing matters. All of my friends are having babies and it goes flawlessly for them… I don’t want to be a jealous, bitter mom the rest of my life… anyone have any advice?

Side note, went to a friend’s to help her pack and saw a box of pregnancy tests sitting in one of the boxes (Easymom brand). I know that’s not a fact that she’s pregnant, but she knew I was coming over, so I’m unsure why she didn’t at least try to hide them. 🥲

I have my first appointment with the doctor who birthed my still birth on Thursday. I have a separate post on here about that. I have read all the medical records from the hospital so I know they are going to say that the only thing wrong with the baby is the knot in their umbilical cord.

As much as I feel guilty for wanting it, I still want to be a mom and try again. However, I am not even sure what questions I should ask at this appointment. I just want to know what will be different, will we do more scans? More testing? My anxieties are going to be so high and I want reassurance that everything is okay. Should I ask whether we should see a maternal fetal medical doctor?

Does anyone have any advice regarding this? So nervous. Dreamed I had another baby last night and all went great. For some reason that has set me off today and it was a hard day, so I appreciate any help!

I’ve had two losses now, no LC, and I get pretty bothered when I hear relatives or friends saying we should hurry up and have kids or ask when we will have kids etc. It’s like they don’t understand that it’s not in my control and that I’m not fortunate like others who have easy and smooth pregnancies. Most people don’t know I’ve been through these losses….next time someone tries to talk about this topic, should I just tell them outright I don’t like talking about it because I’ve been through two losses?

I really hate it that people normalize asking others about their family plans when they don’t know what’s going on behind the scenes. I also hate it when random people we just meet ask us if we have kids. How can I stop feeling triggered by this?

I was also extremely annoyed when I was pregnant when others kept asking me if I was pregnant because I wasn’t drinking or eating certain foods. Especially being asked by those who knew I already had a prior loss. Now that the second pregnancy also ended a loss, I am extra upset about everything and don’t want to see these people.

How can I handle and cope with all this?