Tomorrow will mark exactly one year since he left. It has been the worst year of my life, and every single day I have cried my heart out. 365 days of tears. But I figure that if that’s the price for having known him, then I gladly accept.

I saw the light in his eyes fade when he died. Death had always scared me before that moment. Then I saw it for what it was. You are here, and then you aren’t. No pain or fear. Just on and off. At the time, I didn’t know if I believed in a soul. Then I watched as the light in his eyes went away, something went with it, and then I knew to my very core that he wasn’t here anymore. The body left behind didn’t even really look like him anymore. “You can never be sure of a presence, but always sure of an absence.” A quote attributed to Jean-Paul Sartre.

I still wonder where he is. Does he see me? Can he hear me? Does he know my thoughts? Is he haunting me? He totally would haunt me if he could. Will he be waiting for me when it’s my time? Will there be anything at all?

Questions without answers. So I let myself imagine what he’s doing and what may be. I sometimes daydream of him running through the forests we would trek through with wild abandon. He loved nature. Other times, I like to pretend that he’s actually haunting me, and I talk to him like he’s there in the room. Fun fantasies that inevitably lead to me gradually melting into a messy pool of tears by the end. The tears always show. Even today, I pulled into my driveway, and one second I’m perfectly chipper, then the next second, I’m straight sobbing. A short burst of intense emotion, and then it was over. I hadn’t cried all day, and after I calmed, my first thought was, “Ah, there you are.” I was wondering when they’d make their at least once-a-day appearance.

God, I loved that man so much, and I will miss him for the rest of my life. The pain of losing him has started to lessen the more I come to accept his death. Time heals all wounds or so I’m told. He’s not really gone, though. I feel his presence through the memories we shared, the love we had for each other, and how I will live the rest of my life in a way that would make him proud. It’s how we are connected and always will be. I am who I am today because of him and I am so grateful to have had him in my life.

I’m so lost 😞 I miss my dad so much

3 weeks ago I lost my father unexpectedly, He had been ill for a week prior with supposedly gastroenteritis. I didn’t believe what the doctor said as in a qualified nurse so I know the symptoms.

But then 3 weeks ago, on the morning of his death I said to him we should go to the hospital to get him checked out but he was like no I have antibiotics I’ll be fine, and well I knew he had autonomy over himself so it’s not like I could have dragged him in. But then later on in the evening after my dad went to the toilet he started making weird noises, I went into his bedroom where he was half dressed and he was awake but my god he looked so bad.

Obviously I ring 999 while trying to keep him conscious and then having to do cpr for 35 minutes (and then hurting him because I broke his ribs and I felt it in my hands - but then I knew I was doing the right thing) because he went unconscious etc, while having to ring 999 back three times as he was getting worse and worse (while trying to do cpr is fucking hard). The fact is like half way through doing the cpr for that long, I stopped to check his pupils, pulse and everything and I knew he was dead, I told the operator and they told me to carry on so I did but it was pure torture.

Eventually the ambulance came and they tried to work on him but after 30 minutes he was dead. I thought I would be strong enough dealing with a death in the family, Ive worked all around death for years, both in traumatic settings and then peaceful settings within hospices. I feel so lost now, my life went down hill from 2018 to this year and I felt this year was getting better and then this happens and then three months before my dad’s death my grandmother died. I know it’s a sort of saving grace that I’m back in with my parents and was in at the time because my mum didn’t know what to do and she kept throwing up over this. Ive tried to block out most of the memories from the incident but I keep getting flashbacks of my dad’s face and realising he was dead while working on him and I can’t even go to that part of the house anymore and my head just gets worse at night I hate this.

Me and my mum originally wanted to just do a direct cremation due to the sudden death and the trauma from the incident so then we could have just gone to places he loved and spread his ashes (sorry if that sounds bad but I just don’t like funerals) But my brothers who weren’t there when this happened wanted a proper funeral, So that is happening but I’m dreading it and the dates keep changing due to paperwork I just want this over and it’s.

The stress from this all is making me so ill and making my symptoms from what I already suffer with go out of control and ruining my life. I tried to play Tetris after this happened but I couldn’t focus and I was in too much pain. I just feel like I’m a let down. If I dragged him to the hospital he may have survived and be here today, But he’s not, he’s gone.

The post mortem said he had a heart attack and his cancer came back even though they were apparently watching him careful to see if the cancer would come back, but he’s not. I miss my dad so much but I don’t wanna cry in front of my family and I’m trying to be strong but I just break down whenever I’m alone due to the fact of the situation and because of the cancer he had as I worry I might get it as it could be genetic and his doctors told him to tell his children to get genetic testing but yano NHS is strained so it’s difficult.

Sorry for the long rant, I guess this is the first time just typing everything out and reliving it all.

I miss you dad xx

In June this year I lost my step-dad to several different cancers and with the country he lived in he was able to do medical induced suicide.. I was on call while everything happened and for us to say goodbye. It’s been 5 months, crying is difficult for me to do, I’ve bed rotted as well as staying home plus gaming to try escape to going out drinking with friends and trying to enjoy life. I’ve been struggling to sleep as well to the point of going between 30/60 hrs with no sleep, have been put on sleeping tablets and it helps but I don’t take them everyday as they can become addictive. No matter what I do I can’t escape the emptiness and much more. This also comes 2 months after the 10 year anniversary of loosing my biological father which has been hard and rough over the years! Does anyone have any coping mechanisms to help or for me to try?

Six months ago I had to put my dog down due to the law in my state. It completely traumatized me. He killed a baby goat four years after eating a chicken and due to state law he needed to be put down. It was so morally repulsing. My head still spins when I try to think of the law. Anyway, I considered suicide the night he was euthanized. I took myself to a psych ward. It took me a week to get medicated to go back to living. Fast forward to now, I'm starting to forget him. I remember his head on my lap as they sedated him. I remember the feeling of my hand touching his fur. But I'm starting to forget everything else about him. I know *deep down* that I remember him. On my birthday this year I was severely mentally unwell. I woke up sobbing, the guilt and pain of him not being here consumed me the entire day. I had to leave work early and cancel plans because I couldn't control it. A time before that, I went to grab his toys to put them in a closet and I just started sobbing on controllably without warning. My body absolutely remembers but my brain is blocking it.

I had a dog that was stolen many years ago and it was so traumatic for me that I've forgotten him all together. I see pictures and nothing clicks as if it was a long ago dream. I'm so scared and terrified that this will happen with my baby bear. I keep his picture by my bedstand along with his paw print and his collar. I still keep his toys where he left them and his blanket on the couch but it is all starting to lose touch slightly. I don't want to forget the dog that was my life support for the last three incredibly difficult years of my life.

Has anyone learned how to keep a loved one alive in their memory after they have been taken away? I know it's a trauma response but I don't want to forget him at all.

Thank you all for your kind words in advance.

(27F) My father unexpectedly passed away this past weekend and I just found out today. He has been an alcoholic since before I was born, but when he is sober he is a good person. There were several years that went by without any communication. I recently started trying to have a relationship with him again this past year. He was doing well from what I thought. We kept in touch the past year, just trying to learn about each other and move on from the past. I didn’t know that the last time I saw him (a few months ago) was going to be the very last time. There was still so much to talk about from my childhood, so much I wanted to forgive him for. As long as I’ve known him alcoholism has been the worst disease I’ve ever known. I wish we could have had more of a relationship before he passed. I’m in such shock. Any advice will help please.

I was getting ready for work when the hospital called and said that my mom had been brought in by aid unit and they were currently doing CPR. When I got there they were on their third round of CPR. She didn’t make it. I am alone in dealing with her apartment and affairs. My siblings are not in a place to help me. I live close to her apartment and need to start removing all her things.

I feel very overwhelmed at this point. I work as a 911 dispatcher and have to return to work next Tuesday and honestly do not feel like I can. For the last several months she and I were not in a good place and I feel badly about that. I wish I would have gone and seen her one more time. I wish a lot of things.

My mother-in-law was put on hospice and I’d like to get my husband something that will help him remember her and how much she loved him. What is something you received that is priceless to you?

I lost a very close friend of mine 4 years ago after a drunk driver hit her car, and there’s 3 specific songs that still make me breakdown anytime I hear them so I avoid them, ( it’s because I have a videos of us jamming out in the car singing when we would hang out, and ) but whenever I hear them out in public it’s almost like a trigger to my tears and I break down, example: One of them is bet on it from high school musical, and they had a Disney Channel night where I work and I had to stop what I was doing until the song was over, does anyone else have weird songs that shouldn’t make them emotional, but it does anyway? What do you do so it doesn’t make you as emotional anymore?

I was a goofy kid, and I found it hard to fit in at most of the schools I went to. I was feeling particularly alienated in the 4th grade, until this new girl moved to our school. suddenly, i had someone i could joke around with and not be made fun of! someone who made me feel safe at a time when i felt extremely uncomfortable! we grew close over our childhood years, but I moved away in middle school and we lost touch. we would still interact occasionally on social media, and she donated to my fundraiser for the epilepsy foundation after finding out I had epilepsy a few years back, which meant a lot to me. I just found out last week through memorial instagram posts that she had passed. I have no idea how, and I can’t find her obituary anywhere. I have an idea of what happened, but it makes me feel awful that I wasn’t there for her enough to prevent it. I’ve just been overwhelmed with grief but I almost dont feel justified in it, since we lost touch. But I also feel very lost and afraid knowing she is no longer here.

8 years ago on August, 26th, 2016 me and my family lost my uncle. Growing up my father was an abusive drug addict who was never around and as a young boy I wanted/needed a father figure, due to my mom's poor relationship choices (I don't completely fault her for it) my uncle became my father figure. The things I missed most about him are that I felt like I had someone whom I could actually talk to without worrying about him going and telling our entire family about it and being mocked/criticized for it... he also was a big dude (both vertically and horizontally) such as myself (not so much vertically) and gave the best bear hugs after he passed i became the person who gave out bear hugs but ever since the day we lost him I don't get anymore bear hugs. When he was here he made me feel seen, loved, heard, and appreciated.... I guess it really just didn't hit me in the moment because I was pretty busy with school and activities back then but now that I'm forced to face my emotions I'm feeling it more than ever.

My mom passed away in march and I seen her pass away in front of me but also a lot of stuff in my life has been changing so quickly my dad started dating someone in June and now his already getting remarried in November and I haven’t heal yet and still grieving I don’t know what is going but I have been having really strong emotions then just grieving emotions is it that it’s trauma and becoming depression I been thinking about death a lot

I just thought I would post this song I listen to often. My older sister passed away due to breast cancer back in 2017. Extremely aggressive and they tried everything they could.

She was the most energetic and loving person, she taught kids and loved every bit of it.

Through my grief I found an AI site to make a song about her and thought you guys might like it and hope it will resonate with you as well.

If its more painful to listen to then please don't, it just helps me when I'm feeling sad.

https://suno.com/song/f4597d86-60fb-4409-b420-d7452454bd15

Hey, I’m a disabled female 29 years old. I don’t know where to start or what I’m even trying to say. I’m just struggling a lot. My mom was diagnosed with ovarian cancer, she got a surgery to remove her reproductive organs then years later it was bladder cancer. She fought cancer for nearly ten years it going in remission and coming back full on. I spent nights in the emergency room with her, falling asleep in hospital chairs. She passed away this year July 30th due to a blood clot setting gangrene in her leg. She was fully going to do amputation but as the medical power of attorney after hearing the doctors speak— I decided to ‘let the infection run its course.’

I was told my mom wasn’t coherent enough to make decisions for herself at that point. She was on blood thinners. She had terminal cancer with an inoperable tumor (or however you want to phrase it I’m sorry I don’t know all the terms properly). I struggled with feeling like I killed my mom every day.

Now, my dad passed away due to heart failure on October 27th. Our last conversation was an argument where I yelled at him to leave me the fuck alone. I avoided talking to him an entire day after that and later at 1am found him already ‘gone’ at home. Our relationship was rocky at times and complicated but I loved him and now I have to live forever knowing the last thing I said to my dad was leave me alone…

None of this feels real. I’m struggling to ever see myself healing from this. I’m hurting so, so bad. Sorry for any grammar problems and the likes.

Just a few days ago, October 26th, marked 7 years since my Mom passed away from breast cancer. She was first diagnosed at Stage IV. My family and my mom's friends have a tendency to use any comments/posts I make about my mom to offload their own emotions and baggage about the loss of my Mom. I didn't feel like dealing with it, so I decided to post here instead. I hope that is okay for this forum.

The last major life event that my Mom got to witness on Earth was my wedding (and her making it to that was a miracle). I think back over the life events since then and she has missed a lot - from outstanding triumphs to crippling failures. Since she passed I have made complete career changes, moved houses, become a Dad (to beautiful twin boys) and so much more. I know that she would be proud of me and of her grandsons.

At the time of her death, I was petrified about forgetting her. Ironically, as I grow in to parenthood, I see more of her in myself than I ever did before. A testament to her amazing motherhood that I am forever grateful for.

This time of year is always tough for me - I find myself hurting in different ways this year than ever before. My appreciation for my Mom has grown and matured since she passed. I wish I had the ability to share that with her now. She deserves to hear it. I also wish I could have seen her as a grandmother, because she would have just been wonderful at it. I have learned over the years that grief evolves and changes - and I know these new feelings this year are representative of that. That is okay by me - but it still hurts nonetheless.

If you read this novel, thanks for your time. I just needed a safe, low-energy place to put this down at. I wish all of you the best.

So my sister was a addict she was addicted to alcohol, meth, pills, anything that will do the trick to get u high, she struggled most her life with it she was diagnosed with liver disease like 4 years ago or so and she continued to test her limits for years whether she was nearly on her death bed or even just continuing to drink and do drugs ya know, one time the really really big scare she had overdosed and her bf who is a user broke her ribs and etc trying to get her to breathe etc, and she was in medicated coma for a while and then had feeding tube and etc and the doctors actually were doing some the dumbest shit I’ve ever seen, they tried to say her temp was high so they started icing her LITERALLY, she was ice cold guys and they were dumb finally were like hey she’s freezing they almost killed her this was north memorial hospital in mn robbinsdale, sorry how u fuck that up, anyways got better got sober and then the doctors decided to tell her she was doing so good she might not even need a new liver !, he told her you can survive another 2-3 years if u continue drinking….. then she got back to drugs and everything, she went up and down from drinking and drugging etc and it was a battle for me and my family everyone who loved her, she then this year got her own place and me and her were not under talking terms because she continued to drugs and alcohol not caring , I bought a house Christmas then February March she moved into her fancy brand new apartment, with her bf same one who drugging yes , and they were both still doing the same things now it’s like free for all they got there living area and no one to say hey u can’t do that or etc cuz she lived either at treatment center or home bounce around ya know, anyways they weren’t stopping, the bf decided to try and get bitches over and screw other drug users women who struggled, he continued to cheat on my sister stealing her money while my sister continued to try and take a step to try and get clean , can’t do that with ur spouse , he would abuse her in videos I found on her phone he would shoot her up while she was unconscious, and she would record and keep everything, he would lie to women on internet saying im living with my sister when it is his fiance, well following last week of the life of my sister the bf decided im going to bring all the hoes over while she in the hospital dying, the hospital stated we got 3-6 months left… but anyways bf don’t care he’s doing whatever my sister had two kitties which I own now, don’t worry, so the doctor told us hey u guys got 3-6 months we’re gonna figure either hospice or something nicer idk , we have meeting everything , next day it’s Friday im like Saturday im gonna see her she was conscious etc Friday her numbers bombed she had hepatitis c can’t treat while she was in hospital and one her lungs collapsed and she was at hospital for a month no drugs nothing in system okay, Friday mom calls me she’s got an hour left, I am in shock , I don’t really wanna describe what all happened but it was traumatic idk it’s fresh still, but anyways for some reason there was herion in her system the day she died Friday… I don’t believe that she just randomly got worse, i believe the bf came in to her hospital room and shot her up, I say this because I do have proof of bf stating so and describing things, and in multiple messages him stating that and him stating we can do it in the bathroom we just gotta close the door etc whole description, then after my sister died he stole money out of her bank account not even a week after she died , he also got trespassed from her apartment because day she died he was bringing girls into her apartment after she died also he’s not on the lease at all 🫡 he’s a piece of shit I know but fuck me the shit after shit, he continues doing things to frustrate our family he came to funeral and left 6 mins in The ex was there and he showed up the entire day and dad really dislikes him , but it was good idk I wanted to get it off my chest and talk maybe connect with people etc this isn’t the full story but it’s what I want to share rn anonymously idk my friends don’t really get it or care they told me to go to grief group

My aunt L passed and its been almost 2 years. When she passed it was very unexpected. She was only in her 40s, had twins that were 6 yrs old and needed her. She died of a brain aneurysm. I remember when my mom found out (i still had no clue) and I heard this scream from her that just thinking about makes me want to sob. My mom was very close with my aunt L and her sister aunt P. They were all like sisters. My mom just couldn't comprehend. That scream was so painful. And i drowned myself in my situationship at the time and just tried to stay strong for my mom, ignoring all those feelings.

But this hurts. Everytime i think about it it aches so hard i can't do it. I have to push it down. I just feel like... im kind of going down a similar path she went down, and i just wish i had more time to talk to her, to know her not just as my aunt but as a woman as a person, because i know she went through so much.

How do you deal with a pain that has been growing so strong for the past 2 years?

A few days ago, my wife got news her mom overseas had a heart attack and was in the hospital. She then went overseas and luckily was able to say her goodbyes before her mom passed away. She'll be grieving with her family for the next 1.5 weeks. For the time being, I can only comfort her so much through text (I had to stay behind to watch our kids, we didn't have enough money for all of us to go). I plan to have our house spotless, a good idea for someone who's been overseas regardless of whether they're grieving or not. At least she won't have to worry about any chores. I will also of course hold her and give her comforting words. However, I don't yet know what it's like to lose a parent. To anyone who has lost a parent, what do you wish someone had done for you to ease your grief?

My mom passed away from stage 4 triple negative breast cancer with Mets to the brain and bones and cerebrospinal fluid (leptomeningeal disease) on Easter Day 2024. I (40f) am her daughter and have been her primary caregiver since she was originally diagnosed in 2020. It’s been several months now since she’s been gone and I’m not expecting to feel like 100% but it seems as more time goes by the more upset I become. The more breakdowns I have. The more intrusive thoughts I have- and by that I mean thinking about her last days, and it’s been effecting my daily life a great deal. I’m wondering if it’s possible to have some sort of ptsd after caregiving for someone for four years and then they are just suddenly gone.

It’s been rough this past month getting use to not seeing him or hearing his voice. I saw him every day because I lived with him and I got so used to being able to be a part of his life and now he’s gone. There’s days where I can’t stop thinking about him and others where I’m too distracted to think and sometimes I feel guilty about that. I’ve been feeling angry lately at every little thing, everything sets me off and I hate it. It hurts to watch my sister in pain after a loss of a child and my mom isn’t taking well. They’ve called me the strong one because I haven’t been letting it get to me but inside I feel like I simply want to collapse. I miss him.

It's a week shy of 6 months since my mum's fiance died, we were close. My own dad is still alive and well and we get on well together but he was like an extra dad even though we weren't related. I could talk to him about stuff I couldn't talk to my own dad about and we had more in common.

I don't know what it is but today I've just really missed him and I don't really know why. It's just been a normal day, I would usually go to see him and my mum and gran would be there too and we'd have Sunday dinner together which he always cooked. Which is what happened today but it was just me and my gran since mum went feeling up to going out which is what we do now on Sunday instead.

I'm still haunted by the day it happened. My mum called me and asked me to come down. I assumed he'd been taken to hospital and she needed me to take her down there. He's not been well during the week so it wouldn't have been a huge shock for him to be taken in and sure enough was I pulled up outside an ambulance was pulling away.

So I went inside and I don't know what it was but was soon as I walked in I knew something wasn't right then mum told me and we both burst into tears.

Part of me just wanted it to be over with and go back to normal but I also don't want to forget.

I keep thinking of things I'm looking forward to like a TV show but then remember that he liked that as well and now I'll have to watch it on my own and won't have anyone to talk about it to.

On to of that a couple of weeks ago I found out my best friend from growing up has committed suicide, not recently but back in 2022. I only found out because it came up on Facebook that is was his birthday so I messaged him and got a reply for his wife telling me.

I mean I know it happened nearly 2 years ago but to learn about it now I feel awful about it and keep thinking how I should have been there more and been a better friend. It turns out I had messaged him only a couple of weeks before it happened but he never replied

I just want this year to be over, it's been a horrible year and I just want to draw a line under it and start a fresh. I know it won't really make a difference but we can hope.

I just needed to put this down somewhere. Reply if you want but I'm probably never going to look at this again.

Maybe that's my mistake, thinking that at one moment the pain would go away but everyday and everytime I can see them in my mind, when I see other cats or other dogs, I remember their eyes, their habits, how they used to be.

I remember my cat's goofy behaviours and my dog's silly and energetic personality and I missed them so much that I could cry in any moment if I remember them a little too much.

I have tried to not think about it because I know I would cry but sometimes I can't avoid to ask myself how many years, how many time, would I still be this way? In which moment of my lofe I would finally think about them without feeling this pitch of pain in my heart.

It's been 3 years since my dear doggy passed away, he was my best friend, a member of my family, I spent 12 years of my life with him since I was 5 and I was so destroyed when he died but I think I have process his deatth better than with my cat.

My cat ran away a year ago and I still feel dizzy and hurt about it, partially I keep blaming myself for not doing smth better to protect him and another part can't fully accept that he is gone and he is probably won't come back ever again.

And it's hard because now I feek paranoic and afraid of getting new pets, I've already had two, another dog and cat but aside of them, I can't accept more, I feel numb and empty, it's like as if I can't accept the fact that adopting new pets means losing them again and my heart is not that strong to hold it.

I know I shouldn't limitate myself but I can't avvoid it.

I miss my dear pets, I miss feeling their presence in the air of my room, I miss their naughty and silly attitudes, I missd hugging them and hearing their little but fast heratbeats, I just wanted them back.

It's been a while so I feel embaarrassed to keep these feelings so alive, most of the people would probably get over already but for some reason I can't. I kneo they are just animals but my pets meant the world to me.

I don't know what to do.

My best friend was killed on Thursday night by someone driving a tesla speeding and driving the wrong way around a community college in Stockton. We had been texted minutes before they were hit. I had a gut feeling I should have been on the phone with them but I pushed it away because I was playing a fucking video game.

I'm so pissed that this happened cause I just learned that their boyfriend had proposed and they said yes. He was supposed to fly down and suprise all of us with the news. They were even starting to plan the wedding already. No one knew except their boyfriends sister but that's because she helped her brother pick out the ring.

He made them so happy, and it pains me that before they could actually meet in person, feel each other's touch, and grow old together their life was taken away because someone decided that speeding was more important then driving safely.

All I want to do right now is cry and scream but I feel like I have no right. I only knew them because they were my partners cousin but in the two years I knew them I loved them with all of my heart. They were the sibling that I wanted, the one that could make me laugh even if I was having a bad day or was fighting with my partner. Even if they didn't have an answer I knew I could rant at them and they would do the same.

The first time we ever met was at Sacanime 2 years ago, and the first thing we did was trama dump to each other. There have been so many moments between then and now where we would laugh and cry about different visions we had.

I don't know what to do anymore. My heart is broken and I feel so lost. I can't see my life without them but now I have to life without them and I hate it.

Two days ago I lost my best friend (M25) to cancer. We were very close and constantly talked to one another every single day. From good morning to goodnight. He sent me snapchats every single day and he sent me instagram reels constantly. We communicated on all platforms. We had a friends with benefits sort of relationship that borderlined being in a romantic relationship. He came over to my place any time I needed him whether it be emotional support, helping me move in, or to simply hang out. Our friendship was more than sex. It was the most precious thing I’ve ever experienced in my life. He was my first everything. My first time having sex (as embarrassing as it is to admit it since I am F24), my first time loving someone, my first time wanting to be with someone for the rest of my life.

Ive never had a relationship like that before and now he’s gone. I never imagined I would ever be without him and I cry every single day at every single hour throughout the day and night because I won’t ever be with him again. I won’t ever talk to him again. I won’t ever make memories with him again. We planned so much for the future together from graduating grad school together, moving in together, traveling to Japan again but this time just the two of us.

I don’t know how I’ll ever get through this. My phone is now silent because he was the only one who constantly messaged me. I sit in my apartment alone with my two cats at a loss because he was the person I lived for. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how I’m going to get through this. I don’t know if I’ll ever be okay.

I rooted for him so hard to kick cancers ass and to recover, but it took him away way too soon. He was someone i wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I was excited to grow old with him. But now I sit here alone – 3 hours away from my family, crying in my apartment alone begging for it to all be a bad dream. I wait for my phone to ding and hope that it’s him, but I know it won’t be anymore.

If anyone has gone through something similar, or just loss in general, I would love to read what you have to say. I don’t know what to do. Anything would help.

Communication with dead husband

I lost my husband tragically and unexpectedly in a skydiving accident 9 years ago. I still think about him and miss him daily. I have seen the same medium several times over the last few years and she was able to tell me things I don’t think she guessed or googled (picked up his spirit, energy in the room, knew what sports he loved, could tell me how he died, described our dogs and places we had traveled to….) (she also eventually predicted my current partner/ she kept seeing a stethoscope and someone speaking Spanish- I travel a lot and thought I might meet someone in Central America, turns out it would be at home in California, but he is a physician and he is fluent in Spanish as we went to medical school in Puerto Rico). I don’t think she was a scammer; I believe she really is receiving messages from The other side. She said to me there are many ways the spirit world tries to communicate with us, just as symbolism through numbers, playing a special, meaningful song at an unexpected time, or sending “signs” that refer to shared jokes, something only you two would know etc. she also says that in addition to being open, you can train yourself to receive more of the signs and be a kind of medium through meditation, journaling, guided imagery etc. I’m wondering if anyone else has been able to do this- to improve their ability to Communicate with loved ones on the other side without a medium? Anyone see signs or just know you can feel them there? Or have very lucid dreams where they come to you?

My step brother of the last 22 years, passed away Tuesday. He was a good man, had a lot of his own issues, but always advocated for those less fortunate than himself and genuinely was a good person with an incredible heart. We didn't have a great relationship, just never bonded and what memories we have from our childhood aren't the best. Trying to process this all has me in a weird fog. When I heard the news I sobbed for a good 10-15 min. Now I find myself bewildered thinking about the loss of my brother and how it will affect my other step brother ( the deceaseds older brother) and my step dad. I just zone out completely and find myself lost mentally.

I can't seem to grasp how I feel at all, I'm just numb and can't concentrate on much of anything. Is this shock or just part of the normal grieving process. This is the first person I know that has passed away unexpectedly (not elderly or sick)

Many thanks.

Hey everyone. I'm just asking what I can or should do to try to help my friend whose dad passed away this morning. I've offered to be there for him to talk to him. I've listened to him so far. And I know that stuff helped me when I had to go through it, but I was just wondering if there's anything else I could or should just go out of my way to help do for him.

Yesterday my gf went in for one of her last pregnancy check ups and the doctors found our baby’s heart wasn’t beating. It all felt like a horrible fever dream I couldn’t wake up from, months of emotional investment love and eagerness washed away in a single sentence.

Today my gf ended up giving birth to our beautiful baby girl but knowing she wasn’t here with us lead to me not having the strength or will to see my little girl in person I just know it would have broken me. Just looking at the pictures of our lil girl felt like too much. It felt like I’d already let her down and failed at the one thing I was supposed to do everyone said there was nothing that could have been done but I feel absolutely horrible and the only ways Ik how to cope are drugs and dissociating but I know that would only make things worse.

Me and my partner are both in our early 20s so we don’t really have any friends to talk to about a situation like this so I decided to make this post to help with my coping and grieving instead of stressing out my friends and family but if anyone has any helpful tips on healthy coping and grief it would be greatly appreciated ❤️‍🩹

It's been four months since I got the news. I still have hard days and get choked up knowing I can't just call my best friend, the only person that showed me healthy love, my angel, a serendipitous soulmate. Yes it's gotten easier but it still breaks my heart to know I'll never get to laugh, hold hands, hug, go on drives, pray, cuddle, kiss, hear his voice. What brings me joy is to know he's no longer struggling with addiction, chasing the pavement trying to make his family proud, holding a heavy heart, sad, angry. Four months later and I've kept it together for the most part. Made it look easy when it's been the hardest time of my life. It's been four months and it still doesnt feel real.

𝓵𝓸𝓷𝓰 𝓵𝓲𝓿𝓮 𝓴𝓪𝓲