I know the answer is probably therapy lol but I don't have an access to it right now. However, I wanted to say that I'm relatively stable right now and not depressed, just intensely fixated on the philosophical? problem I'm about to describe. I have a mixed personality disorder with heavy traits of almost half of the specific personality disorders. But it doesn't matter. What matters to me is the fact that I have a personality disorder. At the beginning, after diagnosis, I was in denial. It was hard to accept the fact that my personality, the core of my being, is dysfunctional and unhealthy. That my personality traits are maladaptive, that the way I am is maladaptive. And even though I'm no longer in denial, I still struggle with feeling evil and maladaptive, and like the core of me is wrong. The disordered traits just seem to be so strongly glued to my perception, emotions, and the way I think about myself and others. How do you deal with this sort of existential crisis regarding your personality disorder? What are your ways of looking at this issue? How do I stop putting so much unintentional focus on the fact that my thoughts and feelings are disordered and instead start having more compassion for myself, looking on the bright side of this whole mental health thing? And if you're in therapy/recovered, how did you find your new self, your new, healthy personality traits? Hope someone would relate and that it all makes sense, forgive me if it doesn't.

I'm trying to find out which one of the personality disorder is the most preoccupied by all of this..Thank you for the help!!

My (31F) younger sister (29F) has been one of the closest people in my life. It hurts but her attitude and behaviour is so toxic, that I can't keep making excuses anymore and I've tried to distance myself as much as possible. I thought she would grow out of certain things but she has just gotten worse with age.

The idea that she has narcisstic traits or even undiagnosed NPD makes sense the more I think about it, I've seen a pattern in that: she talks excessively about herself and expects you to hang on her every word (very rarely asking about you or giving you the same time or attention), she thinks that everyone is out to get her and bad mouths anyone that tries to hold her to account/provide constructive criticism, she's been fired from three jobs because she was not a good fit for the companies but is adamant that the bosses and her supervisors were the issue, she holds a lot of rage and will take it out on the people that she doesn't like or deems inferior (she has gotten physically violent with me on two recent occasions when I called her out on her disrespectful behaviour and when I wasn't validating her belief in certain conspiracy theories), she has used the silent treatment on me and then to our mum (acting completely shocked and hurt when she gets the same energy back), she is extremely immature and will mock you and completely disrespect you in an argument (honestly, trying to have a civil conversation to set boundaries is like repeatedly bashing your head into a brick wall or trying to play chess with a chicken), she weaponises her incompetence- she has made fun of how her friends/flatmates were so messy and unclean but she herself exhibits the same behaviour and never picks up after herself or lifts a finger to help around the house, for the past few years it feels like I have to walk on eggshells around her (I'm always tense and expecting the worst when she walks into the room).

My sister has been diagnosed with ADHD but I feel like she uses that as an excuse for how she behaves a lot of the time. I don't think this diagnosis explains her limited empathy, fragile ego and rage.

Thank you for reading through such a long post, I feel so sad and exhausted to be living with someone like this, I've been questioning if I am a bad person and that is why my sister acts like this? I would definitely appreciate people's insights and advice on how I can frame these behaviours in my own mind and any advice on how to navigate them would be much appreciated.

TLDR; My sister has been diagnosed with ADHD but certain patterns of behaviour make me think that she has undiagnosed NPD. I feel hurt by how she treats me and other members of our family. Having context for her behaviours will make me feel less alone in dealing with this. What do you think?

I am overwhelmed by so much guilt, remorse and empathy.

I am sorry for having delusional beliefs that the corrupted police are after me and I am sorry for having paranoid fantasies to harm police officers due to symptoms of Premorbid Personality Disorder prior to symptoms of Bipolar Disorder with psychotic features.

I now understand that police brutality is a rare statistic and most of you are harmless, thank you for your service, I appreciate it 😊 😁

I know that a lot of people on social media self diagnose as borderline because they think it's a trend and I don't know how to adress that I think i might be borderline without sounding like that and people immediately dismissing me. Ive done research on objective websites, read into the disorder , observed my behaviors and took mental notes whenever i noticed a symptom i read (without forcing it obviously). Ive had multiple friends i spend a lot of time with joking about my intense mood swings as well. I talked to a friend who is diagnosed, described him what i feel and he said that that is 100% what he feels and that i should go see a psychologist for it. Another factor is that my ex girlfriend is borderline and she didnt have her disorder under control AT ALL. And i notice after my suicide attempt ive started feeling how she acted. Im not sure if i want to list all my symptoms here but i show most of them How the disorder develops also fits, since i have childhood trauma from mental, physical and sexual abuse as well as trauma related to drugs and neglect. So, as you notice, im not self-diagnosing because im edgy and cool but because i have actual reasons to think so. How do i adress this??

I don’t even know how to start this it will probably be long. I am at my wits end with all of the problems I experience in my life that seem to be completely because of me.

I’m 24. I have always been different from my family and struggled with my mental health. Ive been diagnosed with adhd since childhood and anxiety and depression since my early teens. (Recently I got a bipolar diagnosis after a manic episode post breakup but I’m not sure about that one)

But anyway I’m going to start at the beginning.

(If you don’t want to read this part I’ll put a “SKIP” you can scroll down to)

I’ve always been the most difficult one in my family, had a really terrible attitude, getting in blowup fights, really causing them, but I always refused to see that part.

Growing up, I had an insanely toxic and volatile relationship with my mother. She was incredibly explosive, the tiniest thing would set her off into a rage fit of screaming and I would come right back at her with the same energy. Almost every weekend that I was with her (divorced parents since age 6) my dad would have to come pick me up with my bag packed because we needed to be separated. It would get tj the point where our neighbors would be warranted to call the police. We’d scream at the top of our lungs to the point my throat would be sore the next day, sometimes even throw things. My dad and I have long had suspicions that she’s undiagnosed bipolar because after these fits of rage she’d be like what do u want for dinner or want to take me shopping the next day etc. I know now that she would experience bouta of depression laying in bed crying etc, which in my childhood I ofcourse paid no mind and attributed it to her being dramatic or seeking attention.

Anyway, since this started early in childhood I became a product of my environment and exhibited the same behaviors as her. People would have to walk on eggshells around me because I would blow the fuck up and go into like a black out rage screaming my head off and fighting til I’m blue in the face as my brothers are literally flabbergasted at why I’m reacting this way and saying it’s like I was possessed by a demon and after an hour of fighting I’d lock myself in the bathroom crying wondering why I’m like this. Id have almost no recollection of what the fight was even about or what was said. I felt like I couldn’t stop. it would affect others too not just my family, when I was 12 I went to a prestigious tennis camp out of state for a month that summer and I had to switch rooms because I freaked the fuck out screaming at my roommates because they moved my charger. It just followed me everywhere I felt so broken because I had no idea why I acted this way. I attributed to my mom and resented the fuck out of her for it. I’d tell her I am this way because of her and I hate her and never want to be like her. The biggest insult my brothers could say to me was that I’ll be just like mom and it cut like a knife, it still does a little.

But anyway My brothers were very helpful in trying to help me to change before growing up and it being too late. They told me she’s in her 40s, she cant change, but you are so young this doesn’t have to be your future. I could see how I’d end up pushing everyone away so I worked hard on myself to stop reacting to things so explosively and made great strides to the point where I felt very proud as a late teen going into college that I no longer behaved that way.

SKIP — start here

I thought I was healed and all good, but now being back around family 6 years later I don’t think I’ve changed that much. I don’t get explosive and scream but I am still offended by absolutely everything and cannot help but to have a bad attitude and pick a fight when someone says something I don’t like or agree with.

I refuse to concede on an argument or admit when I’m wrong. I even want to sometiems but it feels like a tug of war or a pit in my stomach like it’s an internal fight within me. There’s a voice saying THEYRE RIGHT, JUST TELL THEM and like my body will not let me. Sometiems i can do it but it really just shouldn’t be so hard.

I am incapable of seeing the bigger picture of a conversation or people’s intentions. Like for instance when it’s coming from some one I know loves me and only has intention of helping me, I’ll still view it as an attack and react as such. I only will nitpick on one thing they said and how I can prove that it’s wrong. I’ll never let someone feel like they’ve gotten even an inch.

I am told that my tone and facial expressions and the way I say or emphasize words etc are so incredibly harsh and cut like knives and really take the conversation to a level it doesn’t need to be, but I don’t see it. Like in my mind I’m just talking and reacting normally but to them it comes off like horrible but I really can’t see it myself like it doesn’t feel that way in my mind.

I also am really selfish, which has come to my attention recently but has also always been in the back of my mind since a young age. I remember my dad and older brothers saying they would do anything for me or die for me and thinking “well I wouldn’t” as a child. and like to this day I really won’t go the extra mile for people despite that they would do it for me. Like my grandma who basically had a hand in raising me, i get annoyed when she asks me to take time out of my day to go to the store for her or teach her to use her phone. I’m like this with all the ppl who have done so much for me and would do anything for me and I don’t know why.

I don’t feel like caring for others comes naturally to me, as much as I wish it did. I take everyone for granted. I literally don’t know how to care about someone or do something for someone without first thinking of how it/they can benefit me.

I don’t really know if I have empathy now that I think about it.

I have always been CONSUMED with other peoples thoughts and opinions. I am paralyzed by what people will think of me and it affects all of my decisions, actions, words, everything. I refuse to accept that I cannot read or control peoples minds. Like even if someone doesn’t say something to me or act on something that isn’t enough for me to not worry about it or think they are still THINKING something I don’t want them to think. I used to think this was my anxiety but now I’m wondering if it’s something else.

Going off that, I’m paralyzed by decision making. I literally cannot do anything without external validation to confirm it’s the right choice. Anything ranging from needing to google an idea I have for something I want to pair together to eat and needing to see that it’s been done for me to feel okay eating it, to what to say in an email to a coworker, to making a big life decision. Again don’t know if this is just anxiety or what.

I feel like I have these conflicting feelings of like grandeur where for instance I feel like I’m the shit and automatically expect every guy in the function to flock to me and fall at my feet but YET I also have such a fragile self esteem and almost no sense of self.

I do have some concerns with substance use, I don’t depend on them or use them daily but when I do I frequently go overboard. When I start drinking I don’t rly stop. I always want to be more drunk, more ducked up. Or I’ll be irresponsible with mixing a drug with alcohol. Or when I’m doing a drug I want to make sure I’m doing enough to be ducked up or want to keep doing it, like I need to not be present and idk why.

I also feel really aloof and disconnected all the time and have been told I’m oblivious to my surroundings etc. My family worries about my safety because of that and also I’ve been told they think I just don’t care about my safety, like I’ll go anywhere just cuz I something I want to do is there even if it’s not a safe area. And that I apparently just do whatever I want and don’t heed anyone’s advice.

I’m also TERRIBLE with money. My spending is so irresponsible.

I have an incredibly hard time figuring out what im feeling. Like I don’t know. A simple question like “how are you” is always hard for me. And sometimes I’ll struggle with like what I SHOULD feel.

I don’t know. There’s plenty more this is just what I could think of right now. I don’t know what is wrong but I need to change something I feel like im going to end up alone with no one to blame but myself and then still play the victim.

Also I do have a therapist and psychiatrist so if there are things I should mention we look into I can do that.

I'm diagnosed with ASPD. I've read it multiple times that people with ASPD are capable of love. Whether or not I'm personally capable of it, I don't know whether I've ever felt it for another person or my family. I'm curious what this thing everyone says we're supposed to live for is supposed to feel like and if I have actually felt it.

How do you manage your life with personality disorder(s)?
In case you're "just" surviving, what keeps you going?

I'm approaching a state where there's neither a valuable function in my disorder, nor a good long-term excuse/motivation.
Please no sugar coating. I can find meaning in anything, therefore please let me know. Even if it might seem irrelevant to you, no matter what cluster(s) your PDs fall under (or out of).

Apologies if this question was posted before.

for some more information, i’m 18 M and i’m diagnosed with autism and adhd, i also have depression and possibly anxiety. my dad is diagnosed with borderline personality disorder.

for some time i’ve been experiencing things that i feel like can’t be explained by my autism and/or my adhd. i am not trying to seek a diagnosis by posting this, i would just like to hear your thoughts and to know if i should mention this when i start my therapy at this new therapy place i will be starting at.

i fe different from everyone around me. i feel empty and bored 90% of the time and whenever i do feel entertained while doing something, it lasts for maybe up to a half hour. i don’t feel a lot of emotion, i only really feel frustration and embarrassment. i can smile when i find things funny but i’ve never really laughed out loud. i don’t enjoy going to school (or anywhere really) even though i like what i do at school, i’m always just waiting to go home. my mood often changes quickly and i can be fine one moment and snark at people the next without any specific trigger as far as i can tell. i always fear that people don’t actually like me as a person and are just acting as if they like me, and i’ll look for some confirmation that they in fact do want to have something to do with me. i hate being perceived with the fear of being judged.

again, i’m not looking for a diagnosis, but for advice. are these things anything that could be related to a personality disorder, and should i talk with a professional about this?

My friend has multiple personally disorder and one of there personalities wants to date me- what we do? I like this personality A LOT but the rest of there personality’s arnt THAT into me- what do I do? Any ideas?

Sounds weird I know, but to anyone making it through life despite what you got going on in your head, I hope Frostpunk can do for you what it did for me.

The parallels I drew between my life and the directions this game took brought me to tears.

We have a close friend who is 56. She is getting worse each year . She can be fine and happy and one wrong word or thought triggers such a horrific days/weeks long episode of hate , anger and rage which is very destructive. My son is closest to her and she takes out her rage mostly on him . He is 28 and yesterday I witnessed her attacking him while he was driving us . He has three scratches on his neck that look like a bobcat scratched him . How can a grown woman just do this. My son treats her like a queen and she can be nice and fun or most of the time she is evil ( it is so upsetting to me to see her hit him and he won't hit her back. He puts his hands up to protect himself . She has episodes where she bangs her head on a wall or the car dash etc She has tried to jump out of a moving car I've seen this so it's not heresay . If I had a choice I'd keep him away from her but she has him convinced he needs her in his life . She always blames someone else for the anger . She has never apologized . She also refuses to take medication and has not gone to a Dr for this . She is getting worse and worse She was cursing in a fancy restaurant last night . She goes to bed like this and wakes up like this . There is no set period for how long these episodes last but they are very frequent now . Does anyone think this is bipolar or is it a different personality disorder or both ? How do you get someone to see a Dr who refuses ? A 56 year old woman ?

Thank you for any help

I apologize upfront if I will be a little bit off topic, but I will try to come up with the questions.

So I was diagnosed with Pervasive Developmental Disorder around the age of 3 when I didn’t even speak. Maybe it was too early (?)

Then I started to attend preschool and school in special education, and around seven years old, I started to speak fluently in two languages. Though I still had development delay, I was not good and still not good with math. At that point my diagnosis changed to Autism (since PDD did not exist anymore). Not sure if that was right…

Overall I enjoyed school (even though I was bullied by “normal” kids, which is not unusual and I forgive them), including middle school, but high school was too stressful for me, since I was transferred to the best school in the district against my will and without my friends from middle school. At some point my mental condition got really bad, and I ended up with Catatonia at age 15, which is easy to diagnose correctly since I could not move. At that point I started to receive mental health medications (never had them before). My parents fought the district and I was transferred to a “normal” school (still in special ed), which I enjoyed very much.

My mental situation was changing from time to time and I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. My psychiatrist claims that all my conditions can be explained by either Autism or Bipolar. I have no reason to disagree, even though "Forensic" Psychology is one of my restricted interests and I can easily come up with many different diagnoses.

I had several surgeries, including kidney removal at age of two. Recently I had another tumor in my spine, which was removed a couple of weeks ago. As a result I developed a severe bipolar crisis. I cannot sleep since I have nightmares and hear voices. My normal medications do not help anymore. My psychiatrist is trying to find a new combination.

Do you think this can cause personality disorder?

I apologize again if I post too much. Maybe I do that just to hear a nice word. Thanks for your understanding.

I'm 17. I'm soon going into adult mental health services but I'm scared. I was told given the fact I'm autistic and I have a track record of long term, persistent 'negative' actions that I could be looking at a diagnosis of a personality disorder. I wasn't told which one.

I don't view people with personality disorders as lesser beings or evil. But I grew up being told one day things would be good. One day all the things I went through, all the pills I've taken and burns and cuts I've put on my body would be worth it.

But this changes everything. This means if I get diagnosed, I will never be fixed. I will never be normal and happy like other girls my age. I don't want that. I want to be normal I don't want to be stuck for the rest of my life in treatment. And now I have to come to terms with the fact it might not be possible. There will be no day where I finally look at my life and say 'I'm glad all the bad stuff is over. Now I'm going to be okay.'

I'm scared and I don't know what to do and I don't want to be broken forever but if I don't pursue learning if I have a personality disorder then I will spend my life wondering what's wrong with me and if I can be fixed at all.

TLDR: Can someone be diagnosed with more then 1 personality disorder? More specifically BPD and SPD(Schizoid Personality Disorder). Thank you!

​

Hello, I have a lot to talk about but will try to make each sentence purposeful. I have been going through a lot lately and i was diagnosed with BPD, however I believe there is more. I have been looking at other things online trying to understand how I feel, and I ran into Schizoid personality disorder/SPD and it really does match so much of what I feel. Not everything as I feel a lot of my feelings clash with each other leaving me empty and utterly confused, but the main reason for this post was to ask this question -

​

Can someone have more than 1 personality disorder? Could I for example, be diagnosed with both BPD and SPD? I understand they clash a ton and almost sound counter-intuitive, but thats how I've felt since I could remember. Thank you!

I think I found a therapist I trust. (They're a therapist and a psychiatrist in one person and they work with PDs). I think I might try and stop researching this myself and trying to self-diagnose because I think I might start leaning onto them a little. And because researching PDs is overwhelming, and finding out so many horrible things about myself is overwhelming, too (I thought I have empathy.. turns out I have self-pity) And then I just can't pierce them together, I can admit that: I split so fucking badly my view of myself and the world around me changes every few minutes sometimes. So it's literally pointless. (I don't like pointless things. I like effectiveness.)

I am afraid of trusting them if I'm being honest, I will always look for a reason to hold a grudge and be hurt. I'm already starting to harbor some grudges against them and I can't possibly in my right mind bring it up, it's so shameful I'll probably snap in half. But I don't want them to become "tainted" in my eyes either.

What I like about them is how empathetic they are, they actually listen for once (and don't tell me "it's just anxiety". ©My previous psychiatrist. Like no shit Sherlock.) And I know I won't agree with them on everything, I know that every good thing they say will melt off of me and I'll just start turning into a bigger asshole by day, demanding more and underappreciating what I already have. But hey. This is my life. I abuse people. I wish I was stronger and more outward-going, but I am just a coward who hurts people close to me and then runs away. And I'll never admit that to their faces. Fun

Oh, yeah and. I am not diagnosed yet but my therapist did say I most likely have a PD, I think. I just have to wait I guess lmao. Gotta deal with all the repressed emotions I have that are about to explode into mine and everyone else's faces rn.

If anyone read this far, any kind words would be welcome

How do you handle someone who is possibly histrionic?

I (27F) am “friends with this girl (24F) who is possibly histrionic and is displaying inappropriate behavior? The thing is she is a supervisor yet acts very sexual at work with male co-workers and customers. I’m sure it’s an attention thing because she’s only been with 3 guys but I seem to make her behavior worse when ever I’m near someone of the opposite sex, she always try’s to steal the attention by acting or saying something overly sexual. She has been dress coded but other than that no one has really made a complaint about her behavior. How do I approach this, we also hang out in the same friend group (which the majority I like) and of course it’s mostly guys expect her and I . How do I approach her without rocking the boat?

How do y'all cope?

So uh my older sister who is 17 has been displaying narcissistic traits since she was 11 and I was 10, it borders on antisocial personality disorder. I’m making this post because yesterday she told me that she doesn’t have NPD but thinks she has ASPD. This has been resurfaced some memories, when I was in 7th grade she held a knife to my throat and threatened my life because I refused to give her the Xbox controller, when I still refused, she stabbed a pillow 5 times, said I was next and just left. That was 3 years ago and I have to say I haven’t felt fully safe around her since. This isn’t mentioning the mental and sometimes physical abuse she inflicted on me. She’s incredibly manipulative of my mother and I just don’t know what to do. My mother is a push over who caves to my sisters demands. I just want to understand my sister so that I can have a try at peace in my home.

Is there anything I can do to avoid harsh outbursts from her?

Hey guys, we have an assignment where we have to determine which personality disorder is this...wondering if you could help me...thanks in advance!!!

A 19-year-old male student withdrew from college after experiencing a manic episode during which he was brought to the attention of the Campus Police (“I took the responsibility to pull multiple fire alarms in my dorm to ensure that they worked, given the life-or-death nature of fires”). He had changed his major from engineering to philosophy and increasingly had reduced his sleep, spending long hours engaging his friends in conversations about the nature of reality. He had been convinced about the importance of his ideas, stating frequently that he was more learned and advanced than all his professors. He told others that he was on the verge of revolutionizing his new field, and he grew increasingly irritable and intolerant of any who disagreed with him. He also increased a number of high-risk behaviors – drinking and engaging in sexual relations in a way that was unlike his previous history. At the present time, he has returned home. His parents acknowledge that he had early problems with anxiety during pre-adolescence, followed by some periods of withdrawal and depression during his adolescence. They are eager to be involved in treatment, if appropriate.

Hello, I was diagnosed with Mixed PD 2 years ago. I haven’t met anyone much with the same diagnosis as me and I wanted to meet with like minded people.

Hey everyone,

Due to my avoidant and dependent personality disorder, I can feel alienated within my body (a certain emptiness, not knowing what I feel, unaware of how I can feel less empty). This results in feeling lonely (as well in groups of people). I am researching what the alienation is for others with a personality disorder, what the needs are when this is occurring as well if people found a way already to deal with the alienation. Do you all find it 'a problem that needs to be solved'? Or is it something soothing you are looking for?

I am new to this subreddit, and I hope that you feel free to share your story.

Thank you so much for reading!

Hi I got a colleague for around three months and today was the first time I talked to him due to being partnered up with him. First time I seen him I kind of disliked the person, he always seems cold and inanimate, never shows much interest in the rest of the group stays away with earbuds in his ears and sunglasses on his eyes, to be honest he seemed to be quite serious and I took him for arrogant snob, apparently not many like him because he is quite socially unpleasant but as I take it not because of active actions but rather avoiding social interactions. Well today as we partnered up apparently he kind of shows interest in talking to me yet it is obvious he lacks common social skills, he expresses thoughts kind of randomly, yet I am surprised as I did not feel the expected hostility or arrogance of any kind, apparently he never paid much attention to me before since he asked when my shift starts though we work on the same shift and I am the biggest guy in the room who sits five meters away across from him every morning facing his dirrection. What struck me the most is in one of the very initial conversations we had he said that whenever there is no work he has a lot of negative thoughts and has difficulties differentiating them from reality, more speciffically he mentioned fire and burning as in he feels it.... Weirdly enough I am quite fascinated with the individual now and I wonder what his deal is.

Hello,

My name is Josh and I'm a 3rd year university student at the University of Chichester. I am currently in the midst of doing my dissertation on what can influence the development of a favorite person commonly associated with BPD. I am very interested in this and would love if you could take part in my survey by clicking on the link below. Please note that if you do not have BPD or diagnosed officially you can still take part. All data gathered is valuable.

https://chichpscyh.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_6KXuj3ye0CgLIJ8

Why am I interested in this topic?:

The research topic was chosen because there is a significant gap in the literature regarding the favorite person dynamic. most research involving BPD always points to early predictors like childhood or symptomology, but instead ignores what factors could cause someone with BPD to become 'attached' to someone and not someone else. 

For more information, there is an information sheet at the beginning of the survey that answers some important questions.

For even more information please feel free to email me at jwicks2@stu.chi.ac.uk

Thank you!

I have a classmate this year. I'll just call her Vivi. So we've all just turned to grade 11 this school year, and so each and every one of us is a stranger to each other. We've all tried to fit in and get to know each other, and this is where I met vivi. So my first impression of vivi is that she's a good person and quite boastful. She'd boast about how they have like 3 houses in one village, how her father have this big clinic, and how she have a successful engineer boyfriend. I don't really mind how she boast for that, I genuinely believe that it was all a process to getting to know someone, knowing the basic things in their life.

Me and vivi became close, and so she talked to me about this guy in our class that she assumed to have a crush on her. She told me how he always glanced at her and how he tried taking her picture to put at the back of his id. And I thought to myself, "That's so creepy." and as a good friend that I am, I bravely shared this in front of the class. Vivi, however, was not happy with what I told the class. But she kept quiet nonetheless.

Now, every time me and vivi get together, like on lunch or recess time, I could hardly tell stuff about myself because she's always talking. And for that time, I kind of liked that about her because I don't like talking to myself. But at one point, I noticed how her stories became quite repetitive and sometimes altered.

Like how she said that she's living with her engineer boyfriend but then one day she told me that she's living with her parents, and then told me again that she's living alone and away from her parents.

I noticed this, and I distanced myself from her since It's pretty obvious that she's been lying. So fast forward to november last year. I've got my very own macbook! yay! so I brought it to school (just to brag yk), and vivi's been eying on it since the morning. And she goes as far as to grab it from me and take it out on the bag just to look at it. she proceeded to examine it and told me if I bought it second hand or I found it in some local store cause she said that she's certain that is fake. I told her, "Neither, since it's brand new and I bought it from the official store."

Then, a few weeks later, she comes with news that she bought an iPhone 14 pro max directly from the main apple store. She said it would arrive on june since she ordered it customised with deep pink colour. (She told us she won't be bringing it to school since she's afraid that someone would steal or break it (7 out of 10 students in the campus has iphone and it's a private school))

(There's a lot of shit that has been happening, and I think it would take forever to write them all, so I'll proceed to the highlight of it all)

So this happened at the end of february. we have a grouptasks to do, and my one of the groups has been asking our class group chat that there's someone who's in group 6. In that time, they've been asking for every day for 7 days that we're given to us. But no one actually answered. So the day where we have to pass our project, vivi approached us and told us if she can join our group since her current group didn't accept her (She just told the group 6 that she just needed her name on the project and she would pay the two of them 20 bucks each for it.)

we didn't know that. so we agreed to put her in our project so that she could pass. Then, later that night, one of the members of group 6, let's call him june. So june put a bomb on vivi.

it turns out vivi was telling the whole class that they didn't include her on the project even though she contributed everything to it. She also told the whole class that they we're talking shit behind her back. I never knew this, and I was mad furious when I found out.

She didn't contribute a dime on the project, and she thinks just her giving money to them would make them write her name on the project. And june being so furious that night told me all the shittiest things she said to some of our classmates.

Apparently, she told one of my classmates, "Let's call her Mary, and the other one jane. So she told june that mary was a drug addict. and so is jane. she also told june that mary was the type of girl who danced in front of drunk guys (our ages are literally around 15-17 years old. mostly minors) and she told this to to june.

Eventually, the day after, I told mary and jane about it. and those girls are so mad at vivi. She made up stories about them just because she saw them being friends with the guys in our class.

and also, about the guy that she told me that was obsessed with her? yeah. it turns out she was the one who's obsessed and literally fought with his girlfriend. considering she already has a boyfriend too. she also put a lockscreen wallpaper about her partner in dancesport that already have a girlfriend and proceeded to laugh at her when they broke up. (She literally said that it was not her fault she's so hot. disclaimer: She's so short, like a gnome)

She also flirted with our p.e teacher. and also spread a rumor about the guys in the class using drugs in the back of the school gym.

And we talked to her about this. with her mom in the prefect. and up until know she doesn't stop.

just what's wrong with her? and what kind of disorder is this?

Hello, i am an high school student. I was studying personality disorders for my psych test and i have noticed that the descriptions of different disorders on my book feel extremely negative, almost judgemental for the words and the language used to describe them. My book is relatively old but it still refers to DSM-5 (2013) which is still the second most recent edition.

I feel that changing the language and ways in which we speak about these things could help people who get a diagnosis. Im struggling to find anyone talking about this and when i do they talk about specific disorders, never about NPD, HPD or ASPD for example.

What do you guys think. Do words matter? Have you found the professional language to be reductive? Am i overthinking?

I (29M) was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder about 8 years ago.

I am, by all accounts, incredibly contained and stable. I have a healthy, 5 year long relationship with my fiance (29F). It really helps that she is a clinical psychologist in training as she is super understanding, patient and helpful for when things get rough for me. I have a stable job and have been studying for my PhD for 3 years now, with a fourth year coming up. Before I was diagnosed, I knew something was up. I was different but I couldn't put my finger on why.

But I digress. One of the main symptoms I get is a feeling of intense emptiness. The kind of emptiness that melts you into a formless blob, devoid of motivation, drive and intent. I am chronically pessimistic. I am tired every single day. I grapple with the meaning of both my life and life in general, often to the point of anxiety attack. I feel like I stare at myself in third person and am operating a body like a fucking Sim.

I also struggle with my memory. It feels like a complete detachment from the life I lead, like it was another time and place, or the memories belong to someone else. I look at pictures of myself and I cannot make tangible that the person in those photos are me. I've been watching Severance on Apple recently. I am only a couple eps in, so no spoilers please. But I relate to Mark on a granular level in this. Sometimes, it feels like at 29, I still do not know who I am or if I am even human.

Everything is a cloud of haze and fog that feeds into the overwhelming sense of emptiness. What's fucked up? I like it. Severance makes me feel an intense nothingness. I enjoy its liminality and minimalism because it replicates those empty feelings which I want to feel more and more. I guess it's a comfort thing because to me, those feelings are familiar. I like feeling empty because it's what I know.

I don't think there's a point to this post at all, other than asking if anyone else with any form of PD enjoys the emptiness that sometimes comes with it? Is it comforting for you or not? Or if you have had any issues with identity and memory?

N.B. this isn't a bummer circle jerk. I'm not asking people to join me in feeling empty, nor do I want to trigger any intense yearning for the same feelings. If you are struggling with your PD, please seek help <3

Im wondering this as like there is different clusters and for me in the cluster c with avoidant and dependent is so opposite of a person in cluster b. Also i have some shizoid behavior but not enough to have the diagnosis. But schizoid and all that is something else than the other clusters?? But why are they all called personality disorders???? What about them is similar enough to be put in a group called that?

TLDR: I [28M] think my gf [24F] has hpd. I’ve listed some of her characteristics.

My gf and I have been dating long distance for 6 months. I recently read up on personality disorders - my mom is a retired therapist and was talking about bpd so I did some research for my own benefit and noted that my gf has similar characteristics to HPD.

I’ll list a few below:

• She’s a lot of fun but is excessively dramatic: dances, sings in a operatic voice, shouts / talk in weird voices, makes weird faces. I thought she was just a bit immature but maybe it’s a deeper issue.
• Dresses provocatively and is flirtatious with other guys. She flirted with my friend in front of me, hugging him, touching his arm, touching hands etc.
• Constantly wants to FaceTime even when I’m tired and want to sleep and sulks if I don’t. Not receiving enough attention is a constant issue.
• Makes a lot of grand gestures, she spent around 300-400 dollars on my bday gifts after we had been dating for 2 months. It made me feel a bit uncomfortable.
• When we were first dating and not exclusive she would say how “obsessed she is with me” but was seeing a couple other guys.
• Constantly posting on social media.
• I’ve caught her lying before, generally related to her relationship with other guys.
• Used to shop lift when she was younger.
• She went on a trip when we were in the talking stage and she broached the topic of us dating exclusively. Meanwhile she was staying in an Airbnb with another guy. I only found out about it months after.
• Expresses love very passionately but it almost seems too much and superficial. “I love you so so so much”. Would say I miss you so much but when I try to make plans she doesn’t seem that keen. We chatted about and it got better afterwards.

I know it isn’t right to try diagnose people when you aren’t a professional but I love her and just want to know if this is potentially HPD so she can get help/ tools to manage it.