People just give it to me everywhere I go, on the street there's always someone looking at me, sometimes I'm just walking and someone walks by and after they look at me they raise their voice or do something out of the ordinary so I look at them, people open doors for me, at work my coworkers ask me stupid shit just to say something to me, people are even mean to me sometimes just to get my attention, I used to fake illnesseses and cut myself for attention now I don't even don't gotta do any of that I know a lot of you bitches can't relate 🤭😂

This could be either to other disorders, or atypical presentation. I’m asking for the experiences of others, but i’ll list some of my own examples.

• my “provocative” actions are just sex jokes. I’m not actually a sexual person, i just make over the top jokes.

• i get overwhelmed with too much attention, i’m sure it varies but personally i cannot sponge it all and after a certain point i will feel distressed just self isolate until i cool down.

This could likely be due to my stpd, or autism. Ive been described by others as having “feline hpd” as to say that i want attention, just not the centre or too much, and get overwhelmed easily.

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I'm 21 male with hpd looking for other hpd people to chat with

I strongly suspect my mother-in-law has historionic personality disorder. My theory is backed up by my husband and his siblings who also believe something along the same lines. Recently my husband lost his father. He and his father were estranged due to his father being a bad narcissist but my husband was still devastated. Needless to say his mother and father had an extremely toxic relationship in which my MIL was severely physically and mentally abused. Now with his father gone, we are best trying to navigate how to help her but obviously her HPD makes it very hard. She says very inappropriate things and doesn't seem to have any sympathy for anyone but herself in regards to my husbands fathers passing. One issue is she thinks her kids (my husband and his siblings) walked out and left her to fend for herself when in actuality they had to claw their way out as their father was extremely controlling and prevented them from having their own lives until they were thirty so she wasn't the only one who was abused. I understand that these types of behaviours are to be expected with someone with her disorder but I would love to hear advice from someone who has this disorder and if/how they learned to manage it. I'm aware this is going to be a difficult long process that may end up being a waste of time. We already have her seeing a therapist for the first time in her life and i already see some very basic improvements. Any advice other than to run would be greatly appreciated!

14f, im so underage to get a diagnosis but man does this diagnosis fit me. Im so like, lost in validation. All i look for is diagnoses that will validate me and its so embarrassing.

I have adhd and depression but god does it feel like its more than that. so much more. Im on 40mgs of prozac, 18mgs of concerta, and 10mgs of ritalin twice a day. i cant stop talking to older men and seeking validation and love and attention from them. I literally cant. I cried cutting a 30 year old man off last night.

I cannot tell anybody. I feel so uncomfortable when the attention is not on me. I used to always call boys from my school and be so, so like provocative.

Showing my breasts in a tight shirt, or saying weird sexual shit and enabling them when they did so as well.

every one of my exes cheated on me, but i just loved their attention and only one of them i actually loved.

He was the only one i had a like- real sexual connection with. I just dyed my hair black with hot fuckin pink underdye and all im thinking about is what he will think of me and if he will be more obsessed with me than ever

Ive always considered bpd too. I have no idea. I want to say i definitely have a personality disorder but that makes me feel so fucking disgusting.

Like im seeking empathy or overshadowing people who actually have a PD’s struggles. I always think im so much more closer to people than i really am as well.

I have so many people in my mind that i could name as my best friends but i would just be their fucking acquaintance or MAYBE a friend. im so sick and tired of this.

No matter how much attention i get, it doesnt seem enough. I fucking hate when people cancel on me and im so submissive. i need help. anybody, please. not asking for a diagnosis. asking for closure

Did/does anyone else harm themselves with intentions of gaining scars so they could/can be given attention? I purposely would go deep and avoid stitches so I would scar in obscure places so people would notice and look at me. My therapist brought up BPD, but I believe it’s just in relation with HPD.

Hey everyone! I’m writing a fiction book that centers around a group with personality disorders. I have BPD, and I want to be as respectful and accurate as possible with my writing. I really appreciate the insight.

What’s it like having your disorder? How do you cope? Do you have any anecdotes? Are you in treatment? And if so, what? How do people around you react when you tell them? What symptoms of your disorder do you most identify with? Or anything else you want to say…

Just for context, I don't believe I would be diagnosed nowadays because I don't fit the criteria, but I do feel like I have the hpd way of thinking and that right now I am a (kind of) "healthy hpd" and not just "healthy".

The first character would be the protagonist from "The Substance" (the post about her inspired this post) and the second one would be the protagonist from "Nosedive" (honestly, this pressure to always do everything socially right and get 5 stars and afterwards see my own worth as the number people gave me hits close. It's even the reason behind my first panic attack, I guess I am going in the same direction as the protagonist lol).

About the influencers, it really isn't my intention to try to diagnose anyone, but the reason why I started to understand myself as someone with histrionic characteristics is because I really see myself in Eugenia Cooney. This whole cycle of not seeing any worth in myself and having my personality influenced by what others say about me -> receiving hate -> accepting you are that and act even more in that way -> more hate... All that was what happened in the first school grades. There are also other coincidences, but this cycle + style of trolling made me notice I would act in a really similar way if I were in her position. The second influencer would be Oli London, the reason why he started to need attention and, again, this style of trolling while acting unaware/dumb also are something I see myself doing if it weren't for changing schools and starting to make friends.

pretty self explanatory - i (f17, 18 in a few days!) have been considering the possibility that i could have hpd for the past year now, which is funny considering it was the disorder i was sure i *didnt* have around four years ago.

i really like getting attention, to a point where i act unfairly to the people around me. im a lesbian, and last year when i was working with a boy i knew had a crush on me i would be affectionate and potentially even flirty on purpose, even though i didn’t want to date him. everything i want to do stems around wanting attention - i don’t want a career where im not famous, not being known like that feels like a death sentence even though i know rationally it’s not. ive even experienced instances of what seems like reverse stage fright, where i was terrified of performing in front of an audience until i was in front of the audience, at which point i revelled in the attention and didn’t feel as worried.

i get angry when people pay attention to anyone who isn’t me and can even start acting cold to get back at them, even though i know it’s not fair. at points i have even felt jealous a classmate’s boyfriend - someone i don’t even like - didn’t like me better then his partner. and this is only the tip of the iceberg. does this sound like potential hpd, or is this just a natural result of being very lonely in highschool?

I'm Indian, I'm 18, I'm a senior in high school, and I feel like I'm desperate for attention. Every time I see all these beautiful girls from my school that I so desperately just wanna (y'know), I'm just so drawn to them and I like and comment on all of their pictures telling them how beautiful they are, in hopes that maybe they could like my comment and I'd feel noticed. In some cases, that's happened, but sometimes I feel like if they don't, I feel secluded and alone, and just have that hunger for more attention. Which is why I also turned to porn. I see these beautiful women shaking their asses, I think of the girls from high school and picture their faces on the porn stars and I just feel so pleased and worthy of their praise all of the time, that every time I bust, I'm always like elated to be pleasured by them, but I still felt empty and I gave into more of that. I'm still trying my hardest to quit porn even despite how hard it may be. When I'm with my friends, I always tend to get jealous that all my friends are smarter than me, sometimes they belittle me and make me feel low, and other times they help me and tell me that I'm smart and that I can put brain for good use, I'm still very conflicted on it sometimes. Other times, I feel like in conversations, I'm like secluded from all the good, funny conversations that all of them have together, and I feel alone inside, and I want to talk, but either I get cut off or I just don't talk and withdraw myself from them. I'm very anxious and I've tried to get help before, but the one time I did, she cut me aside and said that I'm a worthless piece of crap and that no one will ever love me. I know it's not true, but I won't lie if I didn't say it hurt me a lot to be treated like crap and cast aside like that. These are some of the main symptoms I experience, I don't know if all of them lead to HPD, and I also know that there might be more than one personality disorder i may be missing, can someone let me know, and please be honest and non-judgemental, I'm tired of being treated like I'm not heard.

HPD is like Alzheimer’s. It’s worse for those close to you. I’m sick of knowing that my gf will drop to her knees and suck off any “high value male” that shows her attention.

In order to avoid guilt, she’ll hurry and come up with some reason to get really mad at me. It’s such a pattern that when she gets mad at me unprompted, my “she sucked a dick, again” alarm goes off.

Sex is vanilla. If I suggest more, she half-asses it and then gets mad at me during or after. I’m kinky as fuck, but she doesn’t want to go there. Or it’s a fight.

I hear about her exploits all the time. Of course she denies it all. Always. This sucks. If she was some kind of sex beast, I could live with it. I would think that she just needs more sex than I can provide….okay. Let’s get freaky, baby and you do what you gotta do when I’m not around.

But she’s not. I hate this.

New to this. I was originally diagnosed with ocd and tics but then it all spiraled down and I'm constantly searching for a new diagnosis.

A kind redditor saw my post history and told me of this condition. How do I know I'm 'faking it's again? How do I stop going to university gratis just to know every single doctor and student there?

So we can all agree that larping is a common phenomenon in hpd, i have seen this a lot in other hpd people i have come across and i have even done it myself, the thing is i believe a lot of people are not really super conscious about it or not even conscious at all and might even believe they have the illness they are larping (I'm talking mostly about larping mental illnesses) I think it's a behavior that it's very frowned upon by everyone else but people don't really understand why it's done or where it comes from and we need to become aware of it so we can address it and talk about it so don't be afraid to lmk if you have experiences with this

Spoiler warning,I suggest avoiding this post if you haven't seen the movie yet

So I have watched (most but my eyes couldn't handle much so I stitched rest of it through various spoilers) of this recent movie called "Substance" and I must say Elizabeth is so very HPD-coded imo. I am aware that the movie is all about general experience of woman who ages and can't keep up with the crazy beauty standards and the treatment women in all ages go through especially in patriarchal show business but aside from the general point I just couldn't help but see so many HPD traits in Elizabeth. Her obsession with the other's validation, her self-destructive behaviors, her self-image issues and how she basically self-harms in the hopes of reaching that unattainable beauty which seems to be the only thing she feels makes her worthy of being alive... It was generally so sad but I feel like it especially hits hard if you associated with HPD.

I have no idea how to be alone. I do almost everything i do for attention and i want people to watch me 24/7. If i'm alone i feel like i'm dying or something. I feel mad at my friends for not texting me or giving me more attention. I have no idea how to keep my attention on myself. When i'm alone i just fantasize about people watching me so i'm able to feel good. I get sick of myself tho. Idk wtf to do

Does it happen to you that you hate men but unfortunately you are straight?

Are you tired of dealing with thoughts that sexualize men all day but when they talk you want to rip your ears off? 🫠

I understand that HPD is related to sexual abuse, so it doesn't seem crazy to me to think that many women with HPD hate men.

I may be friends with men, but thinking about them romantically is a horrible experience.

is anyone else here only attracted to one sex but seeks sexual attention from both sexes because its easier? like...sexual attention is the easiest form of attention and validation to get, and men are the easiest to get it from, but i am only attracted to women so i always feel disgusted afterwards

I am literally the only one with carefully designed outfit, everyone is dressed casually, only one person other than me is "dressed" and she just put all her Hello kitty themed clothes and dressed up as "hello kitty girl" I am literally only one who crafted something 😭😭😭😭😭

hi! i have hpd and im struggling atm w feeling like my girlfriend isn’t giving me enough attention? i want to communicate this because it’s making my mental state not great but im having trouble thinking of reasonable and specific things to ask for? like i can’t think of what would specifically help and feel like the “right” attention. my gf is autistic so specific things rly help but i obv struggle w specificity coz hpd lol. i don’t just wanna ask for fawning over me constantly coz that’s not realistic and i don’t wanna ask for sexual attention because i don’t wanna pressure her into smth lik that. idk any advice would be loveddddd

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nYQ20jL5Hzs

Forgive me if this is not allowed, but I stumbled upon this youtube post talking about HPD. What are your lads input on this?

First post in here in a long time, I might do this more often.

I've been doing a lot of inner child work lately. It's been very helpful and healing for me, although it's also disturbing to see just how traumatized my inner child really is. I've been having lots of insights.

I think the origins of my HPD run all the way back to infancy. Last night I had a visceral experience of a baby crying inside of me. I instinctively went to comfort that baby and felt a wave of relief when I did that. Like the baby had been desperately craving that kind of response from a grownup. I realized that my parents definitely weren't giving me enough attention even as early as infancy.

When I cried, either no one showed up or they showed up inadequately. That pattern was then reinforced over my entire childhood. I wasn't seen, I didn't receive compassion, I wasn't validated, I wasn't prioritized. My caretakers were self-absorbed, selfish, dysregulated, checked out. They saw me as an ideal, as defective, as a nuisance, as an extension of themselves. I'm certain that's what sent my attention seeking instincts into hyperdrive.

I know this insight isn't like super groundbreaking or unexpected. But it's healing to have inner confirmation like this of my own trauma. It's been such a long journey for me to feel certain that I actually experienced trauma. I always privately thought that my personality disorder was somehow my own fault, or like proof of my own defectiveness/badness.

Also, I see opportunities to retroactively meet some of those childhood needs, which is the whole point of inner child work. So that's pretty cool.

(Polish link below)

Hello everyone,

In connection with my psychology studies, I am conducting a research project on the links between personality disorder symptoms and romantic relationship functioning in young people.

I would like to invite people to participate in an online survey, which involves completing a set of psychological questionnaires:

• between the ages of 20 and 40,

• who are currently in a romantic relationship.

Participation in the study is completely voluntary, confidential and anonymous. You are free to withdraw from participation at any time.

English:

https://forms.gle/zMV3Qotpef114TaS9

Polish:

https://forms.gle/vuvEMBd71haT58ST7

Also wh

I have been diagnosed with everything from bipolar, adhd, ASD, BPD, etc but never truly felt like I had a place. I mainly agreed on the ASD diagnosis and ADHD since I was diagnosed as a teenager but nothing else made sense. I felt evil, i was a conniving preteen/teenager, I acted out to get attention, if i had a fight with a friend i would alienate them and bully them despite hating bullying due to being a victim myself. I have been seeing a newer therapist who knows her shit, psychology and personality disorders are her special interest so this isn’t just a job for her. She’s been studying me for a while, i brought up multiple diagnosis that I have been given as well as ones I considered having. In her words “we have gone through the entire DSM already. After asking a few questions, she told me she is highly suspecting HPD which she also mentioned besides all the other diagnoses, I have never considered this one. I looked it up a while ago and thought “this isn’t me. i hate talking to people.” until she gave a description that completely blew my mind. apparently she doesn’t think I have ADHD which was some kinda black mirror stuff until she brought up that hyper activity was not something that started in early childhood. My impulsive behaviors were because of attention.. supposedly the only things she sees are ASD and HPD which again, black mirror. I feel like i’m losing my mind bc after hearing about it from a professional psychologist who studies personality disorders for fun and not some random website, it basically wraps everything up to the t. where do i go from here? I sometimes think i’m delusional because i frequently mistake any kind of conversation or looks with men and male coworkers as flirting even though that’s probably far from the truth. Idk where i’m going, idk what to do, i can’t wait an entire week to get more information. any advice?

Hi reddit! i am gonna try to give some background first. My dad died when i was 7, since that age ive struggled with self harm,suicide and substance abuse issues, i dont know if this matters but ive also done theatre since i was 7 and im pursuing it as my career. i have lied every single day of my life to get attention, i lie to my family and therapists that i have scizophrenia which ive been doing since i was 11, i lie to my friends about what drugs im using to get more attention and pity ( for example saying im using harder drugs like heroin when in reality im just using wees). it never seemed to occur to me that it was bad to lie or even that i was lying, it genuinely felt like i was a scizophrenic heroin user. i have no idea how to come clean or talk about this. i have realised that all of my personalities are fake and truely just made up for attention. i need help and i don't know where to start, just a month ago i started realising how horrible i am and realised i might have HPD, i have been living a lie my whole life.

Personally, I have a variety of methods to obtain attention that I need. But, I'm curious, what sorts of things do you do to seek this and which is your favorite way of obtaining it so far?

As like any other I thrive to achieve positive attention. If I had to choose I definitely would choose a positive attention that makes me look good in people's eyes. But for negative attention I realized it's pretty complicated. I don't mind people seeing me as a "victim", I used to like when I was getting cyberbbullied because I could always squeeze sympathy out of people. I would act like it's such a big deal even though I don't really mind it. I don't like negative attention where people I care or I know who thinks highly of me thinks badly of me, but I LOVE "haters" I used to poke them just because I liked the fight the way they reached out to me alongside with the afterwards attention I would get from people I like. So yeah even though I am positive I like a type of negative attention where I am seen as victim or it's from a spineless hater I would hate it if it makes me look bad to others. How's with you guys?

I recently got diagnosed with HPD, which was at first so reassuring and made me feel like I wasn’t insane, but as time has passed I’m now not able to even think about anything else but the disorder. I spend hours just scrolling through google and this Reddit trying to feel a sense of normality I guess.

My brain is always scrambled and I can’t even process what’s going on in my life. I’ve been in this weird situationship with someone higher up than me at work for two months and I put my two weeks in so we could be together, but dear god do I even want this? I think he’s a narcissist but I can’t make myself stop coming to him whenever he calls. He gets so upset with me and causes me to freak out, he doesn’t think I like him sometimes and I can completely understand why, but if he were to finally leave I would absolutely lose my mind. Whenever I feel like I should be upset at him I can completely display that with my actions, even begin hysterically crying infront of him, but when it’s over I’m completely fine. I hate feeling like such a phony.

I just throw myself into things hoping for some sense of approval, I have a new man, new job, new schooling set up for myself, but still I feel nothing. If I’m completely honest I really don’t know how much longer I can keep going at this point. I’m still suffering with my anorexia, but I can’t sleep without smoking heavily so I’m gaining weight and I can see it in my face. I depend so heavily on my appearance to make up for what I lack socially and I’m scared that once my looks lack I won’t have anyone.

One of my biggest flaws is my lack of social skills, I can never think of what to say to people so I either stand silent or say some off putting stuff that makes me feel like an idiot after. I care so much about what people think of me, yet I can’t seem to put the effort to be likeable. I’m absolutely spiraling everyday and there seems to be no light at the end of the tunnel. Im not sure why I’m posting this on here but I guess I just want advice. I feel so alone and so fucking insane.