/r/dadjokes
Welcome!
This is a friendly place for those cringe-worthy and (maybe) funny attempts at humour that we call dad jokes. Often (but not always) a verbal or visual pun, if it elicited a snort or face palm then our community is ready to groan along with you.
To be clear, dad status is not a requirement. We're all different and excellent. Some people are born with lame jokes in their heart and so here, everyone is a dad. Some dads are wholesome, some are not.
It's about how the joke is delivered.
Hello and welcome to r/dadjokes!
Only self-posts are allowed. However, you may still link to images within the self-post if the image is relevant.
A couple of suggestions to follow:
Leave the punchline out of the title!
Preferred to be a joke an actual father said, but not required.
Tag [NSFW] or [NSFL] if ever necessary.
Remember to edit out any personal information that could lead to identifying people in real life. This includes, but is not limited to, phone numbers, email addresses, facebook/twitter/instagram screenshots.
Other places to laugh at:
- /r/jokes
- /r/cleanjokes
- /r/MommaJokes
- /r/ShortCleanFunny
- /r/gatekeeping
- /r/shittyaskscience
- /r/badjokes
- /r/3amjokes
Subs for dads:
/r/dadjokes
11,846,010 Subscribers
I like work socks
They seem to work
08:30 UTC
I recently saw an Amtrak with 8 engineers on board. It piqued my curiosity, so I asked an attendant why there were so many.
Apparently they were training.
08:21 UTC
I drove by a parking lot yesterday and thought “wow…
That’s a lot of cars…”
08:14 UTC
What do you get when you put your hand in a blender
A hand shake
07:21 UTC
Why isn’t there a pregnant barbie doll
Because ken came in a different box
07:11 UTC
What has 5 toes and isn’t your foot?
My foot
07:08 UTC
How do snowmen get around?
By icicle.
04:52 UTC
Who are Santa Claus’s real helpers?
Subordinate clauses.
04:49 UTC
My doctor says I need to cut back on sodium.
I'm super salty right now.
04:00 UTC
How do Greek warrior women get ready for bed?
They put pajamazon
03:28 UTC
What do you call an underwater dog?
Subwoofer
03:15 UTC
Why did the cow get muscular?
Because it was on steer-oids
02:39 UTC
My son asked me what’s the latest time he could call me tonight
I said 11:59PM
02:22 UTC
What do you call a cat who doesn't tell the truth?
A felying.
01:30 UTC
I once measured how I tall I was using cans of baked beans
In Heinz height it was a stupid idea
01:20 UTC
What do you call it when you use the bathroom in a haunted house?
Number 1, a creepy peepee Number 2, a spooky dookie
Credit to my niece for coming up with that one!
01:05 UTC
What do you call a surprisingly small amphibian?
An axolittle!
00:50 UTC
I just saw 2 identical twins dressed up for Halloween…
I couldn’t tell Witch was Witch.
00:36 UTC
Karen: Hey Lady, how much more till my fries are done? I've been waiting for 5 while minutes!
Sorry DOCTOR!! your fries are coming right up! Doctor? i'm not a Doctor! Well, you sure are no PATIENT
00:34 UTC
Dad Joke Request
Answer is Net Prophet. What should be the Dad Joke Question?
00:30 UTC
It's Halloween, and the neighbors already have their Christmas lights up...
So I'm inviting them to our Easter Egg hunt this afternoon.
00:27 UTC
where do turkeys go when they pass away
...the gravy yard
23:39 UTC
He couldn't get the hang of it
My friend worked as a trapeze artist until he was let go.
23:38 UTC
I bought a giant dog from Japan
He's a Dalm-asian!
23:35 UTC
What's made of leather and sounds like a sneeze?
A shoe 😁
22:32 UTC
I took my kid, who was dressed up as ghost, trick-or-treating. At this one house they put the candy bowl a little to high for her to reach. I had to give her a lift.
I guess you could say I gave her a BOO-st. Happy Halloween!!!
22:28 UTC
Was planning to make an Italian dessert for my guests.
But affogato.
22:02 UTC
New boy band for the zoomers has been announced:
No Direction
21:51 UTC
You can call me crazy for having a testicle removed but
I'm half as nuts as you!
21:10 UTC
My wife won’t come to karaoke.
I have to duet alone.
21:09 UTC