/r/dadjokes
Welcome!
This is a friendly place for those cringe-worthy and (maybe) funny attempts at humour that we call dad jokes. Often (but not always) a verbal or visual pun, if it elicited a snort or face palm then our community is ready to groan along with you.
To be clear, dad status is not a requirement. We're all different and excellent. Some people are born with lame jokes in their heart and so here, everyone is a dad. Some dads are wholesome, some are not.
It's about how the joke is delivered.
Hello and welcome to r/dadjokes!
Only self-posts are allowed. However, you may still link to images within the self-post if the image is relevant.
A couple of suggestions to follow:
Leave the punchline out of the title!
Preferred to be a joke an actual father said, but not required.
Tag [NSFW] or [NSFL] if ever necessary.
Remember to edit out any personal information that could lead to identifying people in real life. This includes, but is not limited to, phone numbers, email addresses, facebook/twitter/instagram screenshots.
Other places to laugh at:
- /r/jokes
- /r/cleanjokes
- /r/MommaJokes
- /r/ShortCleanFunny
- /r/gatekeeping
- /r/shittyaskscience
- /r/badjokes
- /r/3amjokes
Subs for dads:
/r/dadjokes
11,864,421 Subscribers
The other day I poured some pancake batter into a grid.
Turned out to be a pretty waffle idea.
21:13 UTC
Difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire
21:11 UTC
Wanna know a good joke about unemployed people?
Nevermind. It won't work.
20:37 UTC
Andy was so sad about leaving his toys, that he drank light beer everyday his first year in college, and is planning to repeat it next year! Oh no, Why?
He wants to have a Buzzed LightYear again.
20:34 UTC
I hate jokes about German sausage
They’re the wurst!
20:33 UTC
I have tried to keep an open mind...
But my brains kept falling out...
20:15 UTC
I like thin crust, my wife likes deep dish. I like whole wheat, my wife prefers white bread. So we agreed on Indian food instead.
It's a Naan issue there.
20:15 UTC
You matter!
Unless you multiply yourself by the speed of ligth squared, then you energy.
20:07 UTC
Did you know you cannot tell the complete history of Japan?
You can only Samurais it
19:55 UTC
What borders on complete stupidity
Canada and Mexico
19:48 UTC
Do you know chess rook always moves straight and bishop moves diagonally
Maybe it is bi-shop
19:47 UTC
Every night for bedtime stories, my son insists I read the label on a can of WD-40.
He’s really into non-friction.
19:45 UTC
My Indian friend just got jumped
He was caught lakh'n
19:07 UTC
My wife always brings her A-Game whenever she makes a dessert from ice cream and berries.
That's why it always turns out parfait rather than parfbee.
19:04 UTC
If Lionel Richie was a tavernkeeper in the Middle Ages...
Would he greet patrons with, "Hello, is it mead you're looking for?"
19:02 UTC
What do you call a future telling grape?
That's So Raisin
18:55 UTC
Climate change made me realize this winter is like sex with my ex
It may never come
18:52 UTC
What’s brown, sticky, and found on the ground at a dog park.
A stick.
18:48 UTC
Have you heard of the standup comedian who is also a loaf of bread?
His newer work's kinda gotten stale.
18:24 UTC
Why did the skeleton skip the audition?
He didn’t have the guts
16:31 UTC
What's the difference between spongebob and a priest???
At least spongebob will ask "are you ready?"
16:26 UTC
I consider myself a generous lover
I pay whatever they ask
16:15 UTC
My 72 year-old mother just informed me she is going to her first "sex party" and doesn't know what to bring.
After some delicate questioning, "Gender Reveal, Mom. It's called a Gender Reveal."
15:51 UTC
What do suave uncles want their date to major in college?
Fine aunts.
15:29 UTC
Toddler with an accidental dad joke
Me: Please don't drop those pumpkins on the floor, they'll make a big mess if they break!
Toddler: Because then they'll be squashed.
15:29 UTC
If they made a female yardstick
I would like to meter.
15:17 UTC
I just got a new car for my wife
!it was a great trade!!!<
15:09 UTC
Where do fish keep there money?
In a riverbank.
15:06 UTC
Don't blame others for the road you're on
It's your own asphalt!
15:01 UTC
My wife was having a big clearout of the house from years of clutter...
...She said she needs to be ruthless, so I threw her out too.
14:30 UTC