Share your goals for this month and hold yourself and each other accountable! No goal is too small. At the end of the month, you'll be able to check in and share your progress in another thread.

Remember that good and achievable goals should be S.M.A.R.T: Simple, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant and Time-based.

I've known my co-worker for about 5 months. She doesn't know about my non-existent dating life. She does know I'm currently single.

I was about to leave work and she said to me "you know, you're a real gem. Whoever you find will be for you". I said, "if you find anyone, let me know!" She replied, "don't worry, you're time will come" and that I'm "still young".

She's a woman in her 50s. I'm 36.

She didn't have to say that, but I'm hoping she senses love in my future.

I also don't feel young. I feel like I've passed my prime. Any pregnancy, if I ever find someone, will be considered geriatric. And people my page are already with someone.

I'm trying to stay hopeful.

I’ve been perpetually stressed for the past year because of school. I didn’t start thinking about Valentines Day until today when I was watching my friend interact with her boyfriend. And I’ve been hearing my other friend talk about a guy she’s talking to for the past two weeks or so and it’s almost nauseating. I’m just so bored with my life. I feel like a boyfriend would just add something interesting. But like it’s never gonna happen because I’m not an interesting person.

Although, I’m just making excuses for myself, I’ve been so stressed and being stressed makes me not want to bother entertaining people’s conversations if they’re not about something I’m interested in, so I’ve been a shit conversation partner because all I can talk about is stuff no one cares about, or nothing at all, so it’s just like, I don’t know. Even if I did have a boyfriend, he wouldn’t even like me or have anything in common with me and it would just be uncomfortable.

Anyway, I don’t know what my goal is with this post. I just sense that this Valentine’s season is going to be particularly rough…

My standards are like on the ground, but I feel like the subject is a total non starter. And I’ve gained SO MUCH WEIGHT in the past 6 months I only really noticed the day before yesterday when I wore a dress that was previously loose on me and now it’s totally tight. So not only am I fat and ugly, I’m fatter and uglier than I’ve ever been, to add insult to injury, and lower my chances of finding somebody even further.

I feel like I can be smart or I can be successful, but it’s just never gonna be enough. I do all of it mostly so I can get a boyfriend anyway…

I hate that it always becomes a focus and a gateway for unsolicited advice and comments. I want to be known for who I am, not for why I am single.

Last night I joined a music club and introduced myself. Then "are you single" question came up again. People will always end up figuring out I have never been in a relationship no matter what I reply.

Then I get comments like:

"But why are you single? You're beautiful!"

"Maybe you intimidate men."

"The right one will come in the right time."

Then when I told them my hobbies, interests and travels they say: "Maybe that's why you're single, you're too busy."

What am I supposed to do? People kept on telling others to go out the house and meet others through hobbies. I want to meet more friends and single men who do the same stuff I love doing. That's exactly what I do, and now I'm too busy?

It's like when you're reserved, you're "not putting yourself out there."

When you're trying to expand your world and meet people through common interest, "you're too busy."

If you're open and telling people you're looking for a relationship, "don't appear desperate."

What am I supposed to answer? Y'all making me feel there's something defective in me that's why I'm single. It's like I'm doing something wrong in my life. I'm just so sick of it.

I sleep in warm laundry to stimulate the feeling of cuddling.

That’s all. Like why. Seriously sucks so much.

Things are going well for me in other departments but I’m bc insistently held back by my looks.

Thinking about all the things that happen when u r good looking I get so jealous.

Most of us here have never experienced romantic relationships, which is bad, but it's even worse when you have little to no friendships or familial connections. I'm soon-to-be 30, work from home, and an only child of a single mother I rarely talk to. I have two friends who are much more successful than me in just about every aspect. They're married with loving partners (one just had her baby!), so I understand that I will always be a second priority or an afterthought to them.

But damn does it get lonely. I try to be super mindful and not bug them with constant messages just because I am bored. I have a personal rule of not messaging them more than twice back-to-back. After that, I'll simply wait for them to respond even if it takes days or weeks because I don't want to be annoying. It's not their fault I have no one else to share things with. But still, I feel like I must be the sad "energy vampire" they have to nourish occasionally.

I try to go out and at least sit in coffee shops, but people usually don't approach me unless it's to compliment my outfit (side note: what is it with the teenage girls who smirk at me whenever I'm in a coffee shop by myself???). I'm so desperate for human connection that I spend hours scrolling social media just to remind myself other people are real. It feels like I'm not only lonely but wasting the majority of my life looking at a screen.

I hate it. I hate it when I am in public, no matter where and there are always girls, PRETTY girls who make fun of me. I hate it when I see how guys are disgusted at my sight. I can't live peacefully, why have I to be so ugly?

Today I was standing at the bus stop, there were like 20 other girls and some guys. Most of the random girls were looking at me and clearly giggling, giving me a "side eye", but they all were beautiful. Guys were glancing at me with annoyed expression or just acting like I am invisible. My everyday look the same.

But also I've seen a beautiful girl with beautiful face, beautiful style (she was y2k or something like that), etc. She immediately catched my eye with her beauty, of course I was feeling envious. Then, I see some GORGEOUS man leaving the bus, he looked so my type (light eyes, light and long hair), and guess what? He's this beauty's boyfriend :-) It might sound silly, but I immediately started sobbing here, why every guy my type is into the most beautiful girls?

It's not the first time tho. I've decided I'll stop having "crushes" because every guy I was into chose a better girl. No man who's my type will ever be interested in an uglie like I am. Not even other guys. Everyone these times is looking and physical appearance what kills me. I have no confidence because of people, I'm traumatized from my past, everyone treats me badly like I don't deserve to be here. Why I have to be so ugly? Why every girl is so gorgeous meanwhile I look like a monster? Why I only attract old creeps and no one my age never looks at me? Oh God, why I have to live on this earth, I gave up on everything, I gave up on finding love because there's no single man who'll find me truly beautiful, I gave up on society, I prefer to stay at my house forever and occasionally go shopping.

I hate my face and height so bad. Some people told me being short as a girl isn't bad, that men like them, but for my whole life I was bullied because I had an ugly face and dwarf's height. Everyone prefers taller ones in my area anyways.

Having a bad face and bad height is one of the worst combo I could ever have in this century. People don't let me live, even when they're just STRANGERS. I have enough, I wanna disappear.

I'm a grad student and was waiting on my bus to arrive, so I went into the bookstore at my university as I was waiting. And it was crazy because it had all these cute men's clothing for my uni by the front and I wish I had someone to buy it for and make them wear it lol. I walked around daydreaming about what it would be like to buy one for him, and seeing his happiness, and imagining myself wearing his hoodies when I'm cold and all that.

And then I walked out realizing that I'd never be able to do that, and the only guys I'd ever buy clothing for would be either my dad, brother, or grandpa. I hate myself so much and wish I could be pretty. Thank goodness the store was going to close soon, so there were no pretty girls walking around in the same section looking at clothes with their bfs to make me feel even more like shit.

Starting to get to an age where it’s kind of uncommon to be a virgin, still not completely uncommon but I meet more people who have been in relationships than those who haven’t. I try to avoid any kind of red flags, I get an insane amount of DMs from men on Reddit trying to sext because of how my posts make me look (disgustingly insecure and desperate). I just delete all of them.

Sometimes I think about how the only chance I’d ever be in a relationship would be a toxic one where I would stay because it’s the only person that would ever want me and I’d put up with everything just for that.

I remember one guy asked me out freshman year, I was so happy I couldn’t even believe that it happened. He gave me so many empty compliments and treated me badly and lied so early on. It turns out he was just trying to get sex from as many girls as possible. I mean he was talking to SO MANY other girls. I almost gave in, because I wanted to experience something and I knew this would be the only chance I’d ever get. But I choose to block him and keep my dignity.

And honestly if I didn’t have friends who have experience in romantic and sexual relationships, I probably wouldn’t have blocked him. But sometimes I regret it when I hear my friends talk about their boyfriends and sexual experiences.

Sometimes I keep those messages from creeps on Reddit for long time too, just sitting there. I’ve never responded yet but I’m sure one day I will.

I have never really worked out in my life, I have no strenght and no stamina, I don't ever feel sexy and I for sure don't look sexy. Still I want to give pole dance a try. Have been for years, but I don't dare to since I'm worried it will only highlight my being ugly and uncoordinated. Especially since I guess I'll be surrounded by fit and attractive women.

It's what's been keeping me from going to the gym as well, but pole dance is even more harrowing. Can you guys hype me up or share your thoughts/experiences?

that sentence will always piss me off. "You're such a catch I don't get it." Feels so demeaning like damn I'm coming up with all the reasons why I'm alone on a daily basis thanks for confirming it yourself. Absolutely infuriating.

Title. 3 years ago, I posted about a friend starting to date one of my crushes at the time. Absolutely unreal that it has happened AGAIN. Another friend decides to tell me shes dating someone I used to like.

Now, Im not mad or anything, because I liked this girl years ago and she rejected me, but holy shit. What is my fucking luck? Im so over it

There's someone I have been talking to here on another account and he wants us to meet. We don't live terribly far from each other. He's very nice and knows I don't have any experience. He's told me his last name and I know his life and job.

He wants me to go there this weekend and will pay for a hotel and stuff for me stay. He's being so incredibly nice about it.

I told him I'm really insecure and feel like he will not like me or my body. And that I've never even talked to a guy romantically so all this sounds like a lot to me and was honestly feeling overwhelmed. Of course he's being understanding and responding perfectly.

Part of me is considering the thought. The other part of me just feels like I should stay home and do absolutely nothing like I usually do because that is the safe thing to do.

Do you think that I'm being smart or am I just not taking a chance and pushing opportunities away from me?

I am so traumatized by people that if I could I wouldn't leave my house.

I've always been bullied because of my face and height, no one seems to understand the fact I don't have a control over it. Now, I'm dealing with extreme anxiety and self-hate. I can't remember the last time I was in public without feeling ashamed and stupid because of my appearance. A LOT of guys made and make fun of me, even when they're just some randoms. Men hate the way I look. But also girls, they're looking at me in a mocking and hateful way, like I did something bad.

I bet I'll never attract a man with my appearance, I'm so ugly and I just have enough. I have enough of my round face shape, I'm not fat but it looks like a full moon. I was thinking about volumetria, but I don't want to look even worse when I'll be old. I can't even count how many guys were making fun of my "moon" face and that my whole face looks bad. The same about my height. Since I was little I was mocked because of my short legs. People have no idea I can't control it. I'm sorry I don't look like a mosquito.

I feel so bad when I see some man looking at me, I'm starting overthinking everything and just being sure he judges me. The only thing men did to me is judging, making fun, insulting. I know I'll be single forever, because no one will ever be attracted to an ugly face since there are so many beautiful girls with slim face, light eyes, long legs and every guy's type.

I feel so broken and depressed.

People act like it's genuinely impossible to be forever alone. I've even seen people go as far as to say no one actually cares if you're ugly, that the average person would 1000% give an ugly person a chance as long as they are well groomed and well mannered.

Well shoot, if that's the case I would absolutely love to meet those people. In my experience people are either rude to you if you're ugly, or you're invisible. They don't give you enough time to show your personality before they deem you undesirable and unworthy.

Then people saying "well I dated someone I thought was hideous before" like I would rather be single for the rest of my life than have my partner secretly think I'm hideous. Believe it or not, ugly women want to feel beautiful too.

Shocker.

I recently saw someone say "ugly people complaining that no one wants to date them is getting so annoying. Go outside and talk to people and no one will care that you're ugly" like bro, if I had a dollar for every time I was outside minding my business and someone went out their way to bully me for being ugly I'd be a millionaire. You have no idea what you're talking about.

People are so exhausting. They will do anything but listen.

Hi ladies,

We need one or two new mods.

• It goes without saying but you need to be a woman.
• You'd have to know the sub, the rules and its userbase. FA women preferably.
• You would have some time to check out reports and mod queue regularly even just 10 min a day.
• You understand the importance of pushing back against all kind of radical rhetorics and are against immature and unhinged content and users (femcels and incels, outrage porn, extremist content and anything cult-like).
• You can deal with abusive content and not get too distraught by it.

If you know the basics of reddit moderation tools, great, if not it's fine and it doesn't take too long to learn.

Send a modmail and tell us why you'd like to mod and let's talk! https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/ForeverAloneWomen

my whole life i have liked a few people (as romantic interests). however my feelings were never reciprocated by any of them. every time i start to like someone it feels good at first but as soon as i realise that this person will never like me back i feel so guilty. as if i am holding this person trapped in my heart, as if a woman like me shouldn't even dare to think of somebody this way. and i feel so ashamed of myself for liking them.

at this point i avoid going to the bathroom because there are mirrors there. my skin is so ugly (i have rosasea). my face shape is the most hideous thing ive seen. makeup makes it worse. no clothes look good on me because my body shape is hella weird too, even if im low/normal weight. how do i even exist in society when 99 percent of people are prettier? obviously i dont dream of love, like id feel bad for the person stuck with me for life , but the discomfort of being perceived while ugly af tortures me

ill say i cant take it anymore, but ofc i will continue to take it, what other option is there, i wont kms because i have responsibilities.

People keep saying that you either need looks or an outgoing personality to attract a man and others, but I think I'm fairly outgoing and open with people. Maybe a little shy initially, but once I get comfortable, people seem alright around me, some even seem to like me as a person or think I'm really funny. But then why does no man want me? Why does it not matter in the end? I spent my teens thinking that no one wanted me because of how shy, socially anxious, and awkward I was so I tried and tried and tried to get better and I'm far beyond where I used to be. I couldn't speak to boys at all, and now it's nothing for the most part and I can get along well with a decent number of them. And yet, still, nothing. Am I really just that ugly? Or is my personality off-putting still? Why do other women get to be bitchy and standoffish but still loved, quiet and boring but still loved, while I have to play the clown just to get people to remember that I exist? Am I really just so hideous that I can't be loved no matter what I do? I've liked guys for their personalities even when they weren't particularly attractive or my type, but I'm not enough no matter what? It really fucking hurts.

I'm bi, and most of the time I have a female preference. But I still crave male validation to feel worthy.

I just went into a store with my sister, and the security guard called her pretty while he completely ignored me. It's not his fault, I'm not particularly glamorous.

It just reminded me of how unattractive I am to men and how much I crave male validation.

Sigh. If I get married, I'll probably end up marrying a woman... but I still want men to like me. I have a lot of shit to work out.

Anyone relate?

I had kind of an awkward moment in class today. My voice got pretty shaky, (due to anxiety) but I chose to ignore it and keep talking. These two girls, I'll call them "A" and "B", laughed at me and one told the other "If I was her, I'd buy a gun and shoot myself."

This girl "A" seems to really hate me. She has called me a 3/10 in both looks and personality just because I'm quiet. She is blatantly rude to people she sees as less than, but disguises her insults as jokes. She's insufferable but everyone continues to worship her. I really don't know how she's so popular.

I don't know what I did for people to hate me so much other than being ugly. I always treat everyone with kindness and respect. I don't understand how MY own mistake makes them angry with me. Like, isn't it MY problem I made an embarrassment of myself?--Why do you feel the need to rub it in and make fun of me? I already feel terrible enough about it. I hate being picked apart by randoms who think they know me. I genuinely don't know what I did to deserve this lonely and pathetic existence

I'm so scared, I know most men won't find me attractive, on top of that I have restrictive filters. This is my only choice otherwise my parents will ask me to do an arranged marriage. I'm so scared I'm getting panic attacks thinking of how other girls will find love on this app and how I never will

some days are so bad for me that i can't help but cry. in those days i cry very frequently. my brain reminds me of some bad memories and the thought that i will probably be alone forever, that i will not have anybody to come home to just crushes me. for real, when my parents are gone i will not have anybody. i will be completely alone. and they are getting older. what will i do? i don't know.

And it's just embarrassing. I used to think it would be nice if someone tried to, but no, it's just not.

I don't want my mother to be engaged in any way in my romantic life. I don't want to date someone a few years older (I like people my age +/-3 years, also for friendships). I don't want to date someone who has been fed information about me for the past 10 years or so, when I know almost nothing about him.

And above all, I don't remember him asking me out so I've no idea what she expects from me. I'm not gonna call a dude I literally met once when I'm afraid to text my friends.

It's been going on for months at this point, I'm afraid she'll start inviting him to Sunday lunches.

My life has been good , bad , worse , horrible, terrible, and I turn into a awful nightmare . I have been alone and lonely all the time it got worse after my mom passed. I have been excluded all my life even by family.

People think I am retard and slow people always talk bad about me behind my back even my family. I am very shy and have social anxiety and I have a disability every since birth I have a hard time learning things and I am a very slow learner and people complain about me at home and work and people complain about how I work even my job coach I had in the past .

Everyone hates me people talk to me for a while and then they stopped talking to me . I wanted to have friends at school and work they thought I was slow and it hurts my feelings and I am afraid to be rejected by a friend or a guy . And I have decided I don't want to get married because I am afraid that my husband will treat me worse than my family and people who I used to work with. I don't want to be hurt anymore.

I think something wrong with me I believe I have autism people talk about me behind my back people been doing this since I was little now it got worse after my mom's passing I believe everyone is taking bad about me behind my back and it hurts my feelings and they have a conversation about me it not good. Okay I sleep a lot I don't talk much I bathe daily I know my hair is a mess instead of taking about me talk to me I don't like it that hurts me feelings . I am having a very bad day I just wish someone care about me .

These thoughts don't leave me, so I think this is an appropriate sub to vent.

It really annoys me, I even hate it when I see MANY couples around me, and I have never had or have anyone. Especially when they're people my age or even younger. I'm able to admit that I'm in the WORST period of my life, which is from 17 to 19. I'm 18, every girl my age looks the same, but beautiful - bright eyes, slender face, tall. They look like goddesses. Really, when I see all these girls wherever I go out, I feel like an alien. They look at me strangely and often talk about me behind my back, thinking I don't hear it (they're literally randoms). I'm not like the others. I look different - worse.

They easily find a boyfriend, guys like girls who are basic or goth. For them, all that matters is a beautiful face, which I do not have.

It also annoys me that many girls tell me that oh my gosh being short is great, because most guys would find me “attractive”......uhh well, no, at least not there where I live. Today I saw about 10 couples and the girls were the same height or 1 inch shorter than their boyfriends. No one in my country, or at least in the city, wants a dwarf, only “Slavic doll”.

I'm really sick of being single, I'm a kind of a person who's extremely lonely, I hate seeing everyone around me in a relationship. In my class, every girl was in at least one relationship, when I didn't even hold hands with anyone. I don't belong to the beauty standards, I don't look like every other girl my age. I dress elegantly and mentally I don't feel like a teenager either. I have never felt like a teenager. I can't wait until I'm finally in my 20s, I'm an adult and I could be with a mature guy who would notice me, because for people my age it's nothing to get my hopes up when every guy loves basic tall baddies.

But honestly, I'm not sure I'll EVER have anyone. Everything will be only worse. Also, I feel in my bones I can end as an old cat lady in years. My sister and cousin who both are 28 now had a kid when they were 17 and got married. They did it too early and I’m gonna do it too late (or never, lol).

It might sound silly, but the beauty standards are getting worse and worse. Most teenagers judge others because of their looks, if you ain't pretty - you deserve to be treated worse than a stinky trash. I'm scared adults will think this way too. People care too much about looks nowdays, will anyone ever date an unattractive chick?

I feel worse than anyone. And people only show it.

I don't take pictures cause I look like a witch