/r/Enneagram

Photograph via snooOG

The Enneagram is a model of the human psyche that is principally understood and taught as a typology of nine interconnected personality types.

This is a community for discussion of the Enneagram and related topics.

What is the Enneagram?

The Enneagram is a model of human personality based on nine types. A basic introduction to the system can be found at The Enneagram Institute.

How to find your type

As with the MBTI, research will be more reliable than tests, though tests may give one an idea of where to begin looking.

This Duniho Enneagram Test may be useful in determining your type. It might be necessary to retake the test a few times before you can narrow down your type.

Type descriptions

Some of the best type descriptions online are from Enneagram Underground, 9types, and Enneagram Dimensions (PDF google doc) as well as Enneagram Institute

The directional theory of the enneagram can be found here: 9 types

Information on Enneagram type relations and compatibility can be found at Enneagram Institute's website

Questions

If you have questions, create a post, or feel free to message the moderators.

Related subreddits

About

/r/Enneagram

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4

SO instinct and social anxiety

Im 9w1 and I used to think I was sp/sx because of how much social anxiety I have and how it leads to me being alone a lot. I often don’t feel good socializing because of how overwhelming being perceived and potentially being judged is. I want to be liked so bad and be good socially, I actually crave to be perfect socially. I put so much pressure on myself about how I make others feel and whether they’re enjoying being with me. I used to think So instinct meant socializing was fun and enjoyable, and that you like it, so that meant I didn’t have it. I’m now realizing I’m probably super so dominant because of how much I care about these things. I know someone who I recently realized genuinely doesn’t want to socialize and is actually happy with that. And it was hard to fathom that someone actually is content like that. I want it so bad, but it is just hard. I’m more comfortable being alone, but I don’t want it to be that way. Who else relates?

2 Comments
2024/12/05
01:33 UTC

7

Offering up my services for those who need help being typed!

Hey y’all. I’ve noticed a lot of people on this subreddit seem to not know what type they are. I have been studying the enneagram for 5 years and have successfully typed hundreds of people: friends, family members, dates, and a surprising amount of random people in small talk conversations. I’m happy to help anyone who is having trouble discerning their type. Feel free to leave a comment!

8 Comments
2024/12/05
00:40 UTC

1

Where can I find an enneagram test for free?

Whenever I finish the tests it says I have to pay. Does anyone know an accurate one that also gives you the song on Spotify?

1 Comment
2024/12/04
21:18 UTC

6

Enneagram 3s... You are good enough

You dont need to fuck Alota bitches. You don't need to make alot of money. You don't need to be super extra hot and say the right words and be a big shit.

You're good enough as you are right now. You deserve love and respect. Love yourself and respect yourself.

People in Africa that aren't as cool as you are sucking and fucking each other. If they can get and deserve love. Then so do you

8 Comments
2024/12/04
22:02 UTC

3

E3 and wanting to perfect every little detail

ive usually seen enneagram 3s being described as masters in cutting corners. now this might just be my Ti in play (im an ENTP) but i rarely cut corners. infact i obsess over the process. i can sacrifice neither the process nor the result. im obsessed over wanting to find the meaning behind everything i put my head into but at the same time i wish to get the best result in the end. im someone who'd stay up till 4 am figuring out my typology but the next morning get up and start my work on time without my efficiency dwindling.

i'd even say that i suck at cutting corners. is this common with other 3s too or am i just defective lol?

6 Comments
2024/12/04
20:54 UTC

8

What is your type, and what types are your best friends? What type is your most recent partner or fling?

I’m curious… I’m a 4w3. My best friends are two type 4w5s and an 8w7. I’ve had many type 6 friends, but none of whom I am still friends with today.

I mainly date 8s and 2s.

60 Comments
2024/12/04
19:36 UTC

8

What is your enneagram type, and what are your least and most favorite types?

I’ll go first… I’m a 4w3. My least favorite is any variation of a type 6 (sorry y’all), & my favorite is type 8.

Super curious to hear everyone’s thoughts.

100 Comments
2024/12/04
19:31 UTC

0

can an infp be 3w4 or 3w2

4 Comments
2024/12/04
19:28 UTC

10

is this a 3 thing?

sacrificing your dreams and hopes in order to become the person people can depend and rely on? growing up i always wanted to be the perfect daughter for my mother. someone who was strong, someone who was reliable, someone who would never bring her any disappointment or be a burden. someone mature and perfect in everything i do.

my father died when i was only 5 and my mother's mom hated her guts. i really hated seeing this so i always tried my best to become someone who would replace my father and my mother's mother and give her the support of a husband and love of a mother. in the process i never once considered of what i actually wanted. because in my mind i always just wanted to be someone my mother could completely rely on and appreciate.

it didn't exactly emerge from the desire of wanting to be needed or anything. more like i just wanted to be that great and reliable of a daughter.

7 Comments
2024/12/04
14:11 UTC

1

Someone to help me find my tritype?

Come on, let's get started, I'm 100% core 4

But I'm totally lost in finding the fixes since I read the wisdom of the Enneagram (otherwise with the tests I had 478).

So, while reading, I recognize myself a little in 1, in 8, and in 5-6-7.

Let me explain. For 8, I'm not really looking for power, other than to increase my level of freedom (in the world of work), and I'm not at all afraid of showing myself vulnerable. On the other hand, I don't want to be taken for an idiot. And so if someone attacks me... I basically have a vengeful nature that I tend to calm and channel to avoid permanent worries, mental burden and potentially alienating too many people? (It's real life)

For 1, well, I'm very perfectionist, I don't want to make mistakes, especially if I have responsibilities. And...I really want to have it ethically. Don't be a monster. Typically I have birds and I want their keeping conditions to be the best, and even, I should have separated from one because of problems between her and me but I can't bring myself to do it because I don't don't want to harm his other aviary companions. I try to live according to my principles and ideals as much as possible (vegan beliefs, although big problem with cheese addiction so I'm not 100%). I consider that the human species should be irreproachable and not commit atrocities, ensure natural balance, not destroy the planet etc...

I often feel anger and generally I tend to keep it to myself while waiting for the right time to express it. But sometimes I suddenly explode.

For 5-6-7: I feel the need for hypostimulation of 5 (I may have ASD), but I am not detached from my emotions, I do not particularly want to find my niche or master a subject. In fact, I even rather like to diversify my activities (I dance, dive song theater, like traveling, and I take care of my birds a lot, while being a part-time veterinarian)

I have a need to understand everything, analyze everything as long as it interests me, and if that's the case it becomes obsessive and I dive into it. But often the obsession does not last over time, it leaves... and sometimes it comes back... Like the typology (it leaves and often comes back, I think I use that to occupy my mind after a breakup etc, it helps me not get depressed)

The 6 I find there for anxiety, and perhaps also the fact of asking the opinion of others. And I always anticipate everything, the positive as well as the negative, so yes, I see very well and I anticipate problems very well. But I don't particularly share it with others unless my well-being could be impacted. And I will be all the more impactful if we could have predicted it, anticipated it, and then I'm just going to consider people like stupid people... And tell them if I'm really angry... X)

For 7, well I have a big problem with dispersion, and I run after what tempts me when something tempts me/calls me. I make a point of enjoying my life to the fullest if I fail to find meaning in it. I also need hyperstimulation to avoid getting depressed (I'm also going to test for ADHD in January...). But I don't have the energy of a 7, nor their optimism.

I have difficulty feeling good in this world because I am constantly criticized for the destructive nature of our species, I am very sensitive to the situation of the planet and the harm that is done to it, I have spent a good part of my life being depressed, not fitting in with my classmates because they were too different/offbeat and focusing on my studies, because I thought my job would make me happy (I was wrong, and I'm working now part time to better manage my anxiety and fatigue and above all appreciate my life, enjoy and do activities that please me, speak to me, make me feel good and excite me where I do not particularly find meaning in my work despite being a veterinarian and saving lives ( it won't save the world) but above all I want to be there for myself and do what interests me at the moment (at the same time I'm not Enneagram 2, nor 3, so professional success/ helping people that's not what interests me the most, especially when I don't find any greater meaning, then I am perhaps constantly looking for more and more, even in terms of the meaning of my life...)

In relation to 7, I would also say that I am deeply disenchanted because for me there is no happy and utopian future that can happen, and especially not in time before climatic, ecological and geopolitical disasters catch up with us.

There you go, I rather excluded the 5 and I was hesitating between 6w7 or 7w6. Ah I would also say for the 6th that finding a support group or anything else is not my goal. I have my own opinions. But it's also nice when I know that I'm not there alone thinking this or that thing.

And I will be tempted to lean towards 1 because 7+8 like 6+8 is too extroverted / too much to cry wolf, or I tend to keep my opinions to myself, to be disenchanted in my corner (I excluded 5 because I really feel less in it than in 7 and 6 despite my need to understand everything, I don't have this detachment from others at all, even if I need time for myself).

In MBTI I am INFJ Functions Ni high, Fe/Ti/Se in balance Low Te, very low Si

But Fi function which explodes my Ni, and good Ne (almost as high as my Ni) I kind of feel like I'm a combination of two profiles (INFP/INFJ)

But Si and Te are weak so INFJ really sticks better especially in year 4.

There you go, thank you for your opinions, I admit that I find the study of tritypes complicated, good except for certain people where it is obvious but perhaps having ASD and ADHD, anxiety disorders, an obsessive personality, and depression is not easy to disentangle what is the order of personality and the order of neuratypy 🤣🤣🤣 (Btw I am slightly HPI)

4 Comments
2024/12/04
13:24 UTC

1

I don't know what my enneagram is help😭

I don’t speak English and I translated this text so sorry if it’s not very good or somewhere it’s not understood

I had a healthy childhood from what I remember my mom didn't put many limits on me so I did what I wanted I was loved I received a lot of attention and they loved me as my dad was I always agreed with my mom and well they separated but that didn't cause me a trauma or anything I didn't care, I was sociable and outgoing, today at 15 years old I have some problems like any teenager in puberty, but summarizing a little how I am well I need to feel that people like me and that I make them laugh, I want me Look, I want you to respect me, not to judge me, it bothers me a lot when they exclude me or ignore me or prefer another before me, I find myself looking for how to steal my attention, how to get a laugh, what to talk to them about, I can change my mood a lot in one day or it may seem that I have several personalities or rather like I get depressed out of nowhere and I become introverted without meaning and the next moment I am super cheerful and energetic, I worry a lot that people see me depressed at school because I am usually cheerful And when I'm left without meaningless energy, it's very annoying because I can't relate to people like a normal person it's as if I had two personalities who decide to go out whenever they want so that's why it's hard for me to know my enegram, my biggest fear is not to be anything in life I want to be cute I feel that my value depends on how cute I am and if I'm beautiful people will give me the value I deserve I feel that I'm worthless if I'm not pretty because I know that people depend a lot on it and that Practically the world revolves around how you look, whenever something happens to me I blame myself for not being or feeling pretty enough because I think that's always the problem of things "it's because I'm not pretty, right?" That's my thought almost always, I'm insecure very insecure although from the impression that I'm very sure of myself I'm insecure and I've moved away from many people in my life because I feel that I'm not attractive or fun enough for them and I walk away before they abandon me or reject me first, when I'm in a good mood I'm cheerful expressive very outgoing but not very sociable as if only with my circle I laugh more the energy is much more noticeable and when I become introverted out of nothing then I become reserved and apathetic like If my self took off from my body nothing excites me swimming immute I don't know how to react to things and I turn off. And well in my worst moment when I have a reason to turn off is when I feel ignored I turn off and suddenly I become aggressive with others for not giving me the attention I look for so much, I couldn't tell you who I am, it's as if I had two me so I can't tell you specific features of myself, if you asked for the opinion of one of my close friends I would tell you the same thing that depends on how I feel. Practically if you tell me with which one I feel more comfortable I would tell you that with both because both are me

0 Comments
2024/12/04
05:49 UTC

1

Question for E5’s for your thoughts

Hi all

I’m an INFP e6w5 in search of some feedback from E5’s out there. I have been interested in a guy whom I think is an INTX e5w6, sp/sx. We’ve seen each other once or twice a week for the last six months or so. At first, he’d walk by and make a little joke or comment. A few months ago, I saw him looking at me for a long period with a wide-eyed, vulnerable look. We sort of stared at each other, sitting a few feet apart. I thought it was very sweet and I wish I’d known the secret thing to do in such moments.

A couple months ago, I’d left something that belonged to me behind, and he emailed me a very cute, but short note about it. I claimed it from him the next week, but he was very busy and there were people around, so nothing much was said. Yet another time, we had a very short ride on the train. He stood just a couple feet in front of me, facing me, with his head bowed. I could be completely wrong, but my impression was that he felt very vulnerable. It was an odd situation, but it only lasted a couple minutes before he got off the train.

I’ve had fantasies of approaching him if there were ever a private moment. I’ve read that being direct is best, but I’m not too comfortable with that. I honestly fear rejection. I imagine he may, too. I can just see things being terrible bc of my e6 desires for reassurance. Being the initiator is unnatural to me.

What should I do? Should I just hang in there, work on myself and just continue, with the assumption that things will work out eventually, for better or worse? Should I just work up the courage and be direct? I can’t say he knows much about me in a personal sense. He is not an easy person to know. So while part of me is very drawn to him, another part knows that I hardly know him. And then I wonder why I’d be drawn to a person who is this difficult to know. We have some shared interests and I believe we have similar values, though all is unsaid.

I emailed him the other day asking about his health, since he seemed run down when I saw him, last. He responded a few hours later and told me he was fine and not to worry. I wish I hadn’t emailed, though I’ve read that one should initiate with an e5.

My theory was that he might have little, serial crushes on women that lead to nothing. So I might just be one of those? He’s been single a long time, so he may just never feel fully inclined to be with another person, not sure. The whole thing tires me out, quite frankly.

I feel as if I’m reading tea leaves or wisps of smoke, lol. I will definitely try to focus on myself in the meantime. Any insight appreciated.

1 Comment
2024/12/04
02:33 UTC

1

How do I know if I'm an 8?

I constantly get Enneagram 8 on tests. Most recently I got 8w7 sx/sp 873. However, I don't exactly behave like an 8. Moreover, some people online have told me I sound more like a 4 or 6.

Of course I know they simply thought that because of confirmation bias. As Sherlock Holmes said, if you form a conclusion before gathering evidence, you will be biased when collecting evidence to prove your conclusion. Moreover, on that specific post I had talked a lot about emotions, anger, and other deep topics like that.

There are other reasons I'm skeptical that I'm an 8 though. I don't walk around like the king of the world, domineering and intimidating. I tend to have a more playful and energetic demeanor, and tend to come off as extremely annoying. In fact, I'm often annoying on purpose. People rarely find me intimidating.

When I think about it, I can be domineering in more subtle ways. I like to take the lead in general, and like to be the one making decisions. I tend to be inflexible rather than easygoing. I never back down if contested. I also value intelligence, competency, and cunningness. I would consider myself pretty cunning at times.

I could also be an 8 because I tend to enjoy conflict; it gives me a rush. I typically enjoy 'beefing' with people. I would say I'm pretty clever when it comes to insults and I don't hesitate to strike someone down with one. Tact is for the weak.

Some smaller reasons I might not be an 8 is because I tend to be lazy and undisciplined as opposed to ambitious, driven, and hard working. Of course, I haven't found anything I'm particularly passionate about, but my adverseness to hard work in general might be telling.

If it helps, I'm very likely an ESFP. Maybe that's why I'm not as intimidating as other 8s.

0 Comments
2024/12/04
02:09 UTC

6

Is Viktor (Arcane: LoL) a 5 or 7?

i know he seems like a stereotypical 5, all lonely and sciencey, but any type fixation can manifest in infinite ways. for quick context, Viktors motivation is to escape death.

type 7s whole shtick is their inability to confront uncomfortable shit, and i dare say, death is the most uncomfortable of uncomfortable shit. so you could argue he's doing all'is to escape the uncomfortable reality of death.

type 5s whole shtick is they fear the world, so they retreat into their head and try to become personally competent to "prepare" for the world (though you can't really call it "preparing" if you never intend to face it). and his particular manor of escaping death is by getting juiced up on magic-steroids, which could be viewed as him becoming competent to prepare for his fears.

what do you think?

i pray you look past the superficial, surface-level crap, and examine the actual deeper reasoning underneath. though i suppose this doesn't matter, seeing as he's been written as a type 1 in season two-

3 Comments
2024/12/04
00:06 UTC

2

What does it mean when a two starts snapping?

Hi guys,

Say there's an enneagram two that has always been peaceable and supportive to the people in their life. This particularly enneagram two bites down on anger because surely you're not lovable if you express anger and people are likely to want to keep you around if you're always cheerful, right? Right.

Well, lately the enneagram two has found it difficult to clamp down the irritation. She has been reprimanding people for every irritation and rude behavior she would normally excuse with a light heart.

What exactly is this? I know the enneagram enough to know the surface descriptions of each type, but I haven't gotten to know what their unhealthier sides are like - so I'd appreciate if someone who really understands the disintegration of types can help me out a little.😅 (Perhaps even E2's who've been through something similar?). Thank you in advance.

3 Comments
2024/12/04
18:22 UTC

1

The Office Enneagram Types

I got into The Office last year with my family (I know, I’m extremely late to the party lol) and I’m a little more than halfway through the show. There seems to be a lot of disagreement about the characters’ types online, and I thought it might be fun to discuss with y’all, so feel free to share your thoughts on any of the characters! Here are mine:I see Pam typed as a 9 pretty commonly, and I’ve also seen Dwight typed as a 6. I agree with these ones, they seem about right to me.

Michael is one I’ve seen some debate on. It seems many people agree that he’s a 2, and as a 2, I never would have guessed that. I would have guessed 7, but I’d be open to hearing people’s thoughts.

Jim is one that I’m absolutely stumped on. I’ve seen him typed as 3, 6, 7 and 9 and I still have no idea - his MBTI is a lot more apparent to me than his Enneagram.

Ryan and Andy both feel like pretty clear cut 3s to me. I haven’t seen any debate on Ryan, but I have seen Andy typed as a 2 a few times which puzzles me - he seems as 3 as they come.

In terms of some of the other supporting characters, I agree with PDB on a few of them - Oscar is definitely a 5 and I also agree that Kevin is a 9. Meredith is definitely a 7.

I’ve seen some debate on whether Angela is 1 or 8 - I would lean slightly more towards 1, but I can see some arguments for 8.

Kelly is typed as a 3 on PDB, and I’ve seen her typed as a 7 pretty commonly as well. This one I totally disagree on - she’s a 2 for sure. When I was watching her, I said to my family that I hated her because I recognized a lot of my own worst qualities in her.

Phyllis is probably also a 2 or 9, but I’m not sure which - I’d be open to hearing people’s thoughts!

If you have any thoughts on these or on any of the other characters, please share! I’d love to discuss one of my new favorite shows with all of you!

5 Comments
2024/12/04
17:19 UTC

15

counterphobic sixes :)

i’m a somewhat healthy counterphobic six and i feel like the descriptions i see online are fairly inaccurate? they focus on a very masculine and unhealthy counterphobic six, one who’s very aggressive and confrontational and lashes out like a scared dog. my experience as a counterphobic six is currently like… i always offer to go first like with class presentations because nobody wants to go and it scares me and i want to take the opportunity to get better at it. i’m frequently pushing myself to make life decisions that scare the shit out of me (leaving unhealthy relationships, taking calculated risk, etc.) that i know are ultimately better for me. i’m acutely aware of my fear but i refuse to allow it to control me and keep me from being the person i want to be. like okay sometimes when im really stressed ill commit a misdemeanor (for legal purposes this is a joke) but overall i really like being my type and seeing other head types be completely ruled by their fear and never confront it head on is exhausting

9 Comments
2024/12/04
14:10 UTC

11

After moths of going back and forth between a 3 and a 7. I finally figured out my type

I was really struggling to tell which one of these two types I am. But now that I think about it , I only seem like a 3 on the surface. I am ambtious, I like to set goals for myself and work towards them, I'm very career-driven. ( took me sometime to realize that these traits are not only E3 traits ).

I realized it today when I was taking yet another enneagram test. I was in the hospital and bored out of my mind. I wasn't really doing the test to get the type, I just wanted to kill the time. Just like in most tests I had a statement and had to select how much it resonates with me. At first I wasn't really paying that much attention. I was just going of first thought, not giving my answers too much consideration. Until I got to a statement " To earn love I must be successful/ present a winning image ". Intially, I just clicked ' agree '. I have seen it while taking tests before and always clicked the same answer. After all, I consider myself a high-achiever. However, this time something about the answer didn't seem right to me. I like feeling successful but I don't feel like I need to be successful to earn love. I've grown up in a very supprotive, " as long as you try, it's good " type of family. I never felt like I had to have good grades or have a high set of achievements to get attention. In fact, now I'm realising that my care about success has always been interlinked with the fear of experiencing pain and deprivation. I've always had good grades but my need to do well in school came over the years as I started to realize all the opportunities that having a good , well-paid career can bring. Same with any kind of competitions. I'd sign myself up for anything that looked exciting to me, not to satisfy some kind of an image.

It's funny to me because only now I'm realizing how obvious it was. And if I only got all the stereotypes out of my head, I would've figured it out much sooner.

I have the typical self-defense mechanism that a 7 has. I've always been known by my friends as the ' optimist '. I never wallow too much in negativity. Whenever something hurtful happens to me I either brush it off or make some rationale about why it's actually a good thing because (...). In stressful situations I retrieve to my mind. I ignore the ruckus and stay in some self-indulgent fantasy. I've always struggled with emotional conversations that require vulnerability. Before I used to thing that it was just me being a 3 and not wanting to stain my image. Now I realize that I just don't feel comfortable going to emotional depths.

I also have a tendency to over-explain my actions. I'm that wierd case of a person who is extremely self aware but at the same time has a very grandiosed sense of life and self. I've always been criticised for being ' too much in my own world '. And being a bit egoistical ; not caring about things that are not of interest to me. However, I've had the ability to gain clarity on my actions and come up with something like , I do x because of y. And so in this bizarre way I protect myself from feelings of guilt and shame. ( it's even wierd writing this because it feels now like I'm trying to explain myself too). It's kind of like I can always spin the situation in my mind , so that I don't have to leave my idealised little world.

Anyways sorry for this extremely ,unnecessary long post. I just needed to tell someone this cause I got excited.

4 Comments
2024/12/04
12:23 UTC

28

Holy shit-- so THIS is what being self repressed is like...

Posting as a 9. So there's this specific phenomena I've been experiencing my whole life. In a lot of situations, my body language will not match up to the emotions I'm feeling internally.

Like say for example, someone gives me a compliment, and internally I really appreciate it and am very flattered, but my body language would suggest that I'm indifferent to and uninterested in the compliment. And it's like I'll kinda of realize that my body isn't matching up and I'll explain myself in my head (like "no, I actually am really touched by this compliment") as if the other person would be able to read my mind and understand.

This has lead to me feeling like a bad person at times because there's a very clear difference between how I interact with people physically and how I interact with them mentally. Cause I realize just how much of an asshole I've been coming off to people and I'm struggling to figure out where to go here. I feel so confused cause I'm not sure which version of events are true (How I remember the situation going and if that's how things really went) and it's stressing me the fuck out. It's affecting everything, man. My work, my friendships, my life at home.

It's crazy cause every time I feel like I'm accomplishing a self improvement goal, WHAM another layer opens up and I realize just how repressed I truly am and that all this "progress" I've been making was FALSE! I'VE GOTTEN NO WHERE.

11 Comments
2024/12/04
10:46 UTC

2

Most accurate enneagram type test?

I am just confused, i keep getting different ones-

6 Comments
2024/12/04
07:42 UTC

4

8s who DISintegrate to 2

I have a friend I am trying to figure out. She is in her late 40s, and 8 and kind of a tough person. She has a tough exterior and is pretty judgmental and not afraid to share her opinions. But she is an amazing friend and goes above and beyond for people regularly.

The thing I'm trying to figure out is why she trusts people and assumes they have good intentions without getting to know them better. I have seen her bend over backwards to help people, myself and our mutual friends included. But unfortunately I have also seen her get used by people who sense she is willing to help and take advantage of her. And then she ends up getting burned in the end and it's really horrible.

She is in one particular situation right now that I don't want to go into but I just feel like sooner or later she is going to be taken advantage of because the people have made her life hell and now she's helping them out. It's all extra confusing because she can be so harsh and judgmental sometimes but then so overly kind and caring, more than necessary.

I have heard that even though there is one type you are said to integrate to, you can also disintegrate to it as well, and in her case I wonder if she is taking on a kind of martyrdom of the 2.

I feel like if I say "hey do what you want but keep your guard up," she's just going to brush me off and say she doesn't need to because these people are trustworthy (she's done this before). I'm just wondering if there's a more effective way to communicate this to her. Does anyone know anyone like this and have you ever found a way to communicate to them that they might need to keep their guard up?

7 Comments
2024/12/04
07:06 UTC

5

Can type 8s have a fawn response?

I thought I might be an 8w9 or 8w7 because my biggest fear is not being in control of myself/losing control of myself to someone else, but when I’m around people who have more power in some sense than me, I instinctively have a fawn response. It’s not like I’m trying to win brownie points, I just feel like I’m in danger and it’s the only way I feel in control of the situation. It’s completely different from how I am normally; I’m logical, blunt to a fault, self assured that things will go my way, and a “my way or the highway” type of person. From what I know about type 8s, I’m pretty 8-like. I don’t care much about what people think of me as long as I’m in control of the situation. I find vulnerability difficult; even in close friendships, being asked to give up more of myself emotionally makes me feel like I’m losing control of myself. I compartmentalize any emotions or insecurities that make me feel vulnerable and rework situations to convince myself that I’m in the right. I feel anger pretty intensely and I don’t really care to repress it nor do I feel ashamed about expressing it most of the time, but I do repress it given the situation. I’m pretty aware of my behavior and I try to not be unhealthy, but I also hate repressing the way I am. It’s not like I’m not a good person, I try to be pleasant most of the time, this just happens to be how I feel alongside my good traits. If this doesn’t sound like an 8, or at least like an 8w9, I’m curious what I would actually be. This was way too long but with this context, could I be an 8 with a fawn response (as a way to have control over a situation) or is that just not an 8-like behavior, since 8s don’t care to adapt to the world around them?

19 Comments
2024/12/04
06:54 UTC

17

Who else here counterphobic?

Damn things give me the willies. I prefer cabinets

9 Comments
2024/12/04
06:02 UTC

4

Anyone has any takes on criminal minds typings?

I honestly wanna post a bunch of these a see people’s takes on specific series

3 Comments
2024/12/04
02:08 UTC

15

What is your shadow's type?

Jung's shadow is a repressed part of personality, something what our ego denies and fears to acknowledge and hides so deep in the unconscious that we are not capable to process it. Just to stress: the shadow is not about good or bad, the shadow is just the repressed (though the more something is repressed the uglier it presents itself when explodes).

The only way to find your shadow is to deduce it. To make a notice about what infuriates you despite having nothing to do with you; or what people think about you which has nothing to do with you.

Two images were coming out most often when I tried to do the shadow work. Mothers (not a specfic person, just professional motherhood when a woman dedicate her life to raising her children). And Ariana Grande. Both seemed totally disjointed until I learned about enneagrams and realized that they belong to the same type - 2w3.

I speculate that the shadow can be one of reasons for difficulties with typing when we mistake manifestation of the shadow with our own type. I also wonder if the shadow can be the main hindrance to the integration.

39 Comments
2024/12/04
00:22 UTC

7

People with RSD, what is your type and how does it affect your experience?

For who doesn't know, RSD stands for Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. Now, I guess these traits could be traced back to specific types (maybe 1, 2 and 6 in particular, as compliant types), but just like any other condition I don't think it's a prerogative of only certain types, hence why I'm asking this question here

I am facing a hard situation at work right now, not going to delve into details but it triggered my RSD real bad. I wanted to know, if you suffer from this, what is your type, if you think it affects this condition in a specific way (by which I mean: is it a general feeling or is it triggered by specific people/situations?), and, if you managed to learn to control it, how you did that

As far as I'm concerned, as a 2 (lately I've been thinking I might actually be a 1, but I'm not sure yet) it's kind of a general feeling in my life, but of course certain people and situations make it worse, for example when I feel I'm being dismissed or when I feel that my efforts are not being appreciated or don't matter. Close relationships or professional settings in particular bring this issue out

I will apologize in advance for spelling mistakes, I'm not a native speaker

17 Comments
2024/12/03
22:58 UTC

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