Hi there,

I recently graduated in the winter time from college in the same small town I grew up in. I have been living at home for the past year to save money, and it's been really hard on my mental health. Most of my friends have moved away, and I'm not very close with my parents. In fact, my parents and I actually argue a lot and living with them has definitely contributed negatively to my mental health. I am extremely lonely and find myself just trying to fill the time when I'm not working.

I am applying to grad schools this year, and want to move to a city that is completely different/bigger. I am just afraid of feeling lonelier than I am not without anyone nearby. Now, my friends are a few hours away by car and I still know a few people in town, so I am scared that moving across the country would still leave me feeling lonely. The thing is, this is something I really want to do and I don't want fear to stop me from making the leap. I need to know that there is a happier future ahead of me.

For anyone who has moved out of their small hometown/college town, how was your experience moving out of it?

Hello Everybody! My name is Si, I'm in my 20s and I started a new project that I'm hoping would be of help. I'm starting a blog that has answers to all the questions we have in our 20s. My answers will be based on research, personal experience and opinions from interviews with people passed their 20s. Think of it as a little community or advice column.

I would also love for people to send me their specific issues and I'll write about it with the answer. That way, anyone in a similar situation wouldn't feel as lonely or lost.

Now, I vaguely know what to write about. I think the biggest issue we face is being lost over what we are supposed to do or feeling lonely. I would love it if you can write out questions you often ask yourselves, things you have googled more than once, or things you would like to know.

My themes are this:

Relationships:

• Family

-Friends

-Partner

Health:

-Body

-Skincare

-Selfcare

Skills:

-Baking

-Cooking

-Hobbies

Finance:

-Budgeting

• Career advice

• Side Hustles

I'll basically be covering the basics of each of those, for example how to make an easy meal or a skincare routine that doesn't need long.

Seriously, whatever you have questions about, don't be shy to ask. If you have specific situations like mentioned above, DM. We'll be able to talk about it better and I'll post about it.

Thank you for your help and support!

I'm looking to seek help for my career going forward, but I'm not sure if the school I went to would still recognize me or have me in their system after two years of little to no contact with them.

I graduated in May 2023, and now I'm a consultant and it's been really weird. Since it's May, it's been officially one year since I've been away from school and I've learned a lot and yet nothing about myself at the same time.

I have no idea why I never changed my major. I have a health sciences degree. I was never invested in it. I was never "depressed" during college due to meds. But I kind of just went through the motions thinking everything would work out even though I listened to most of my friends around me changing their majors.

I'm pretty sure it stemmed from a deep rooted fear of failure from my childhood. Like if I changed it, it meant my degree was too "hard" for me or something. And I needed that validation for some reason.

The irony is, as soon as I graduated college I felt like a failure. Like I failed myself. This set in when I got my first job at $12 an hour. I didn't want to do graduate school. Granted, I eventually found a job for $21 an hour eventually but quit due to depression.

I spent at least 4 years since college unemployed because I tried to go to school again for other things/bootcamps but ultimately didn't like them.

Eventually I got a certification from my job currently and I'm doing decently for myself financially. But I'm still really depressed with my career and I'm thinking about going to school again to change it, this time with a plan in mind.

I'm in my 30s now and feel like it's really late in life to have realized what I wanted though. I just wish I could go back in time and not have been the person I was back then.

Still kind of suicidal but I'm finding a way out.

I guess the lesson here is, have a plan. And don't be scared if you think your major isn't the right fit.

Making progress or change in our lives can require some boldness. The choice to take action can be challenging especially when we often talk ourselves out of doing things. This changed for me when I learned about the 5 Second Rule.

Autor Mel Robbins talks about the 5 second rule and counting down from 5 and acting on something with those 5 seconds. That’s what makes all the difference in ultimately breaking procrastination and getting stuff done.

Much of this has to do with habit building science and the way our brain is wired. I break this down in depth here if you’d like to know more. - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QkG2f_sAYVk

Hope this help you take practical action for your life going forward.

I'm graduating college soon and am currently trying to land a job- hopefully in a big city but we'll see. I do have some close friends that I will be making weekend plans with but this will probably be occasional as they're off doing their own thing. I'm very worried about essentially starting my social life from scratch.

The last time I felt this way was the first few weeks of freshmen year in college, as I didn't know anyone and it was very lonely and scary. However, I was in a building full of freshmen who were feeling the same way, so it was inevitable that I'd find my circle and I did.

However, starting a new job is completely different. Living with a roommate my age in a city would help a lot, but there's a chance I may live with my parents if I land a job that's close to home, and there's really nothing to do here. Any advice or insight on this transition?

I'm currently 19 years old, soon to turn 20. I will soon be starting my second year of college. I live in a hostel. However, I am unhappy with situation I am in.

I like the course I am studying. However, I hate the college and the hostel, as well as the place in which they are. The college is in a rural area, and being a city boy, I have realised I can never fit in.

This has resulted in the poorest grades I've gotten in my entire life. I also hate my hostel life, leading to me not being able to focus on my studies.

Ultimately, I wanted advice on if I should go for another degree in my home city. Please note that to do so I will have spend until next year to prepare for entrance exams. Money isn't an issue. This has also happened in my family before, so that isn't an issue either.

I appreciate any suggestions

I'm graduating college very soon and I'm terrified. For the first time my life will be unscripted. All Im thinking rn is that I wish I could go back to freshman year. Not because my college experience was amazing- it was fine, came with its ups and downs. But the routine of going to classes everyday was very comfortable as it was like high school but with more freedom. I never really had to worry about weekend plans because I was in a campus with a bunch of kids my age that were also trying to go out.

After graduating I have no clue where I'm gonna work (still job hunting which is also causing anxiety), idk who my friends are gonna be and im scared I'm gonna be lonely. Could someone give some insight into how life right after college is/how to deal with it? I know I'm probably overreacting but rn everything just feels very depressing.

So, I’ve been out of school for seven years now. During my junior year I was offered my dream job in my hometown. My parents and a few professors advised me to take it when I was offered it and I did. I’ve been in my field for seven years now and I’ve gone back to my old college and fraternity a few times for a number of homecoming and alumni weekends. However, that came to a halt due to COVID which shut everything down. Two years ago an old fraternity brother and I went back to the first homecoming event since COVID and it was not great. Our old college town was hit hard. So needless to say it was not a good time. I recently went back with some other fraternity brothers to a major number alumni weekend this past weekend. It was nice to see some individual fraternity brothers again but when it comes to the organization as a whole I legitimately did not care about it. Seeing older alumni who I knew as an undergrad and meeting the current undergrads of the fraternity I didn’t care. And I never want to go to another homecoming and I only plan on going to alumni weekends that end in a 0.

Hey guys so I graduate this Sunday and have a job lined up well like sorta it’s a TO I haven’t officially signed anything yet and they’re gonna send me a background check thing soon. It’s a medical assistant job and the reason I’m working this is because I plan on applying to PA school in the future and need health care experience. I won’t be applying until 2 years from now and this job is in my college town which I plan on staying in for another year since I signed a lease.

I was thinking crazy and that I wanted to go to California for the summer to stay with my sister and work whatever job to take time off and also in my college town all my friends are leaving for the summer so I’ll be lonely. Is this impulsive especially since I told the work place I can start May 27th? Thanks!

Hello all! I (F22) am about to graduate with a major in Psychology and minors in Sociology and Fashion Merchandising. I’m really sad that a few of my friends have already gotten jobs offers and know what they’re doing post-grad but I have no clue. I don’t want to do anything related to my major and I was thinking about getting an internship in PR, HR, or Communications but I have only been getting rejections or no response. Honestly wish I did better in college, but I was so depressed entering college during covid. Also, I can’t move back in with my parents because they have a pet and don’t like pets. I’d like to live in Atlanta and my dream would be to move to NYC but that seems unwise seeing that I don’t have a goal yet. Anyone else in a similar boat or have any advice?

Can you give me advice about my decision.

Im graduating high school and I need hurry up and make a decision.

I seriously don’t really know what to do afterwards, as far professional/career wise, I’m not very sure. But everyone told me that going to college is very important, so I have no choice.

I’ve been working a “crabby job that a teenager would work” ever since I was 16, can’t believe that 3.5 years have already passed by. If I continue to work here any longer, that hobby isn’t going to age well.

I know that my peers and family won't take me seriously if I don't take things seriously or enroll in college or do something else. It will be assumed by others that I gave everything up to work at a bad job if I continue to work there

I’m terrible at math, seriously, I almost wasn’t certified to graduate because of math, I got lucky with COVID and summer school, I don’t know if I should to university though.

I heard the rumors on the internet, “don’t go to university, only go if you want to be a lawyer, doctor or an engineer.” I’m for sure not going to school for engineering why would I go to just miserably surfer? Hardcore math isn’t my thing.

I can only imagine the judgement I’ll receive if I don’t do nothing after I graduate, they’ll will assume I choose to work a crappy job for life. Or what if I take a year off, I heard it’s pros and cons, the cons are most likely to occur. Taking a whole year can be leave someone unmotivated, it’s like a body builder who’s been working out since he was 15, and then he decides to take a year off at 18, not being productive and by the time his year is up, he lost motivation and willpower to work out again.

Only major that caught my eye was marketing, I’m assuming that I can study this major, graduate and just work a regular office job with my degree and make a good salary. That’s what the lifestyle I expect after I graduate with that degree, but I could be wrong, there’s people who despise the 9-5 route the “matrix route.”

But if that was the case that would be better than me working my current crappy job for life.

Then there are the ridiculous 14-year-old TikTokers in the style of Andrew Tate, who have no clue how to start their own business. They genuinely say things like, "I'm going to drop out of high school and watch every single Andrew Tate video, take notes, and by no time I'll be a millionaire." - Does that truly work, you know? or how does it operate? It seems like no one will ever post a simple solution or even a YouTube video explaining how to get out of the matrix. However, the point of this entire paragraph is irrelevant.

One more random idea In my mind, I thought that since university is so expensive, what if I had to pay an outrageous amount of money each semester or asked my parents for assistance? What if I ended up failing overall, regretted my degree, or just didn't like it? In that case, my money would be lost, and I would probably end up in debt.

But I should be ok, right? It’s not like I’m going to school for 8 years to become a doctor in Harvard University or a private expensive college. It’s a public research university that interests me is located not far from my house.

My parents have high expectations of me going to school, I don’t want to disappoint them but I also don’t won’t put them or myself in a financial disaster either.

Like I know in saying all of this random stuff, I’m just expressing my thoughts, because this time being Im making the biggest decision of my life.

This shit overwhelming me man 😔

Only major that caught my eye was marketing

I plan on majoring in marketing I have two options

1. Go to university

2. Go to community college

3. My admission has been approved; all I need to do is schedule meetings for registration and academic advising. The best part is that I may use my online "Texas College Bridge Certificates" to waive or excuse myself from taking the TSI exam. Even though Paying for university will be a little pricey, FASFA is the only resource I have to help with costs; I don't have any scholarships.

4. If I attend a community college, I can be sure that my registration will be more convenient , but I can't avoid taking the TSI exam. My test results aren't great; I've taken it around three times. I think I can only retake it in the summer, and I might fail it again because I have trouble with math. It’s most likely that I fail the test again on my final try in the summer, I can still step foot in a classroom; I would just need to enroll in developmental or remedial courses. There are a lot of negative things I've heard about it; apparently, it's not fun. I've heard that it might slow your progress , and some of you people may be better knowledgeable about that stuff. Basically they’re like classes in kindergarten level shit.

What’s the best option for me or any other routes that are better.

Hi all,

I just graduated early from UIUC back in December, and I’m really struggling with my post-grad life transition. I’m 22, a girl, and I’m actively job searching full-time for a role in Advertising or Finance (double major). It’s been an absolute nightmare, and most likely I’m going to end up securing a job that’s in the suburbs and not downtown Chicago. That’s not my preference, because I want to be around a lot of people my own age in the city, but I’m going to take the first offer for something and then just keep searching while I work. I’ve had interviews with Goldman Sachs, UBS, William Blair, and a bunch of smaller firms and everything in between. The number of hoops I’ve had to jump through is crazy and I’m exhausted. I’ve been searching since September.

I’m living at home right now in Des Plaines to save up, and while I love my mom and my dog, I hate the area. There’s nobody here. I’m dying to move into the city to start my life, but money is a hindering me of course. A lot of my friends live in southern Illinois (I met them at school) so I don’t get out much. My parents got divorced last year so I had to move out of Park Ridge and into Des Plaines, which is no where near as nice. I also had a really scary roommate situation at school that has made me hesitant with making new friends. I really want a bf, but I’ve had bad luck with really awful dates and guys with bad intentions. I feel like everyone around me has a bf or gf, and has their life together with a fancy job at a Big4 or investment bank that they post on LinkedIn about that makes 70K+ a year.

I’m just feeling really defeated, exhausted, and I’m comparing myself to absolutely everyone. It’s impossible not to. I use the gym as a way to escape, but even my workouts have been suffering lately because of this. Any advice would really help since I feel so alone.

I’m about to graduate, and I love self improvement and organization and making sure I have healthy habits.

After every closing door in my life, I like to reevaluate my life and organize things. What I mean by that is I reflect on people, habits, hobbies, objects, etc in my life.

After I graduate I plan on spending time cleaning out my social media, organizing my photos, cleaning out my emails, cleaning out my google drive and documents, clean out my phone, etc. I want to reevaluate my morning and night routines, touch base with people I want to keep in my life, etc.

So, with that in mind, what are some things you did post grad to help yourself and kind of reorganize your life? What did you introduce into your life? What did you get rid of?

Any advice or tips or stories would be appreciated! I’d love to discuss!

I have a friend who has been stuck working retail for 5 years since graduating college. They want to take the next step, but realistically they're afraid of leaving their comfort zone. They have an English and communications degree which made it hard to have a plan after graduating. I want to give job recommendations, but don't know where to start.

Are there any "adult" jobs (for lack of better term) out there that don't require a specific degree to get started in an entry level position?

Title, after college all my friends are moving to NYC because of their jobs, but mine is in the Bay Area. I’m kinda worried because everyone says the Bay Area is only older people and also kinda sad that my friends are all gonna be in NYC but I won’t be, they’re even able to room together. Anyone have any tips or advice or anyone been in this position, or just words of encouragement 😭

I like that I'm closer to my family, but I really don't like the job and feel like I don't have much community outside of work other than the rare live music shows in town despite reaching out and trying. I feel like I don't do much here except work and sleep to do it again, and that I have to travel/leave town in order to find community. I've been to and lived in places that felt ambitious and supportive, and this doesn't feel like that. I've been doing this job for six years. It feels like that's a lot of time where I'm not living in a place I should. Has anyone gone through something similar and gotten through it?

Hi! I am currently a junior at a decently big midwest college. I am trying to decide where to move post grad and would like to hear your experiences. Please share your pros and cons!

I guess this is just a vent- I’m living back in my small hometown which I hate, I’m taking antidepressants and I feel stuck. I have been working a shit low entry job after I left university because a job I had lined up fell through. I’ve also been working a part time internship (unpaid) and recently I came across my dream job.Life since leaving uni has been shit I was so happy when I received the interview offer. However, I was so nervous during the interview that I’m sure I fucked up. I didn’t really show anything in the way of personality because I was so flustered. They said they were impressed by my cv and resume and they really liked the fact I used their work in my dissertation. I’m sure however they have received far better candidates and this feeling of being so close to escaping my hometown sucks. The fact I was so close to getting what I wanted hurts so bad and the anxiety of waiting for the inevitable “we regret to inform you that your application was not successful” is killing me. The only string of hope getting me through is that im waiting on a response for a program that would let me work in New York. Im bummed out, can anyone relate?

Rambly vent incoming...I'm 24 and started my first job out of university as a software engineer 9 months ago. I've definitely learnt a lot while I've been here and I get good feedback from my boss, but I'm constantly terrified of losing my job. I feel like I work at a snails pace and I make a lot of mistakes. I've always thought of myself as detail oriented but I let so many things slip here. Is it normal to be shitty at your job 9 months in still? My colleagues and boss are amazing and friendly and supportive but I just can't shake the feeling of judged by everyone all the time. For example, today my boss asked me about a task I've been working on and struggling with a little bit. He set aside some time tomorrow to help me with it. Realistically I know thats probably not a big deal and just him being helpful, but my anxiety is just screaming at me that it's because I'm being too slow and he's gonna fire me. Does anyone else feel like this?

I’m a 23F who grew up in Los Angeles & went to school out of state, graduated & landed a job back home in La. I currently make $69k & have been living at home since I graduated last May. I have pretty decent car (no car payment) courtesy of my parents. My job is remote so I don’t spend too much money

• gas
• Wi-Fi (im reimbursed)
• Dental and health insurance (covered by job)
• Car insurance & phone bill (connected to family plan)

I think I can afford to move out but for some reason I’m chickening out. Also, ideally I would prefer to live with roommates with a max budget of $1300.

My mom is a single immigrant mother & pretty much discourages me from leaving since she prefers I stay with her & my older brother (25) at home. I did go to college out of state so I know it wouldn’t be the end of her world if I did. I just really need someone to tell me it’s okay and possible to do. I don’t love living at home & feel that it has impacted my social life severely since college. There are several things I hide about myself that I didn’t have to when I was away so it’s definitely been a change. Nonetheless, I am extremely grateful for my circumstances & know my mother means well and loves me dearly!

Does anyone have advice for me? Is anyone in the same position? Would love to hear feedback!

College turned out to just be a pricey detour.

Has this same thing happened to you or someone you know?

Tell us about it.

What can I do?! I tried very hard in college but still ended up with a sub 3.0 GPA. But I worked part time during the school year at my campus’ dining center and worked during the summers at UPS.

If your young, do you have a vision for your life/future?And what does that entail?

If your older, did you have a vision or idea for your life in your youth? How did it work out?

Been there long enough ! 22F

Graduated about 5 months ago and the memories just started hitting me. I felt very privileged. Not many get this opportunity. Lot's of ups and downs during college. I took 2 years longer to finish the degree but have no regrets.

I felt so hopeless back then. First to go to uni so the journey was tough emotionally, physically... I felt it was meant to be though and still everything turned out great. No more sleepless nights because of crazy assessment items/workload, less pressure, crying, missed bus stops, less stress and anxiousness. I can finally have a routine. Left my crappy part-time job and I have a job directly related to my degree now. More free time. Go to work, come back home and do whatever I want.

Excited short term because nobody really cares. We just have to keep doing what we're good at as humans which is to serve others for the rest of our lives. Not in our place to ponder about the universe and why things are the way they are. God, I wish I was born a level 5 alien life form. Life would be so much eventful lol

So I’m currently a senior in highschool. Will be graduating in less then 2 months. I have 0 interest in college and don’t plan on going. But I also don’t know what to do after school. I have a few interests in things I want to do when I’m older with the main one being real estate / flipping houses. As of right now. 18m with $1000 to my name. What should I do. My girlfriends step father works as a contractor and fixes up houses. I have the opportunity to work with him, should I do this? I plan on it. But is it the right move. I see it as a way to gain knowledge on fixing up houses which I can use in the future. I don’t want to work in a factory or be a slave my whole life. I want to be financially free before I’m on the deathbed. Would like to do something where I’m my own boss. Thanks.

Hi there, I‘m a junior in college studying sociology and I‘m wondering how worthy or important a data analysis or cybersecurity minor might be?

I’m also curious what type of jobs people are getting in these specific fields (whether that be bachelors or masters, etc)?

Any advice and thoughts are greatly appreciated!