FAQ

Hey Reddit,

A few months ago, I made the decision to switch jobs, and now I’m struggling with a lot of regret and grief over that choice.

To give some context, I work in the legal field as in-house counsel (I’ll keep the details vague). I got my law degree and qualifications earlier this year, and while I was studying, I worked for the same company in a different role and team. They promoted me to a lawyer this year after 9 years of hard work and dedication. I always believed it was my dream job—the one I’d stay in forever—even though it was my first and only job. I worked incredibly hard for every promotion, even having to beg for a permanent role each time (even as a Lawyer).

But soon after my promotion to lawyer, everything started to fall apart. My team shrank drastically from 5 full-time employees to just myself working full time, plus two senior part-timers. I was still a junior, learning the ropes, with minimal mentorship from seniors who were often unavailable. I ended up managing a substantial workload of 85 clients. We were getting constant client complaints, and the seniors didn’t have time to properly guide me. I feared making mistakes every day, and it took a serious toll on my mental and physical health. I was struggling to get out of bed, battling depression, and it started affecting my relationship. And on top of all this, my workplace was fully aware of a significant family trauma I was going through at the time. My other colleagues were visibly unwell with stress as well. There was promise of hiring another person to help but they didn’t do so until I left.

Things got worse when my company car, which my boss had promised to honor, was taken away. The pay raise they gave me to “compensate” didn’t even cover half the cost of what I was now responsible for, plus I had to buy a new car. The financial strain, on top of the work stress, really pushed me over the edge. I started resenting the company.

I was in the lawyer role for about six months before I decided to leave.

An opportunity came up at another company for a legal position that wasn’t quite the same as being a lawyer, but it offered a significant pay raise—$20k more—and a much more sustainable workload with 30 clients. It also involved a project that would look great on my CV. But the tradeoff is that this company is much smaller. The growth opportunities are limited, I no longer practice as a Lawyer, and the team are not very passionate. They can’t accomplish half of what my previous company could, and it’s almost comical to watch. I feel like my growth will stifle in this company. However, my pay and conditions are fantastic, and I’m constantly appreciated for doing relatively simple work. On top of that, my mental and physical health has improved dramatically. My payout from the last company in leave paid for a car.

Even so, I can’t stop feeling like I sabotaged my career. It’s been months, and I can’t stop thinking about the 9 years of hard work I put in to get to the role I had, and how I seemingly threw it all away. I’m jealous of the person who was recently promoted to my old role, and now they’ve hired an additional person to help with the workload. The old place felt like family to me, and the company was so unique that I don’t think I’ll ever find that again. I keep thinking I should have just stuck it out a little longer—it might have worked out in the end.

So, Reddit, how do I deal with this regret?

I graduated in August 2023 from a prestigious university with a double major in Business & Political Science with a concentration in fintech. I started job searching in February 2023, and after nearly a year of effort and thousands of applications, I finally landed a full-time job in February 2024. Unfortunately, the role I secured in accounts payable has turned out to be extremely repetitive, monotonous, and low-paying.

For the past 10 months, the lack of challenge, growth opportunities, and human interaction in this position has significantly impacted my mental health. I’ve tried to pivot by interviewing for other roles, including financial analyst and consulting positions—both of which align more closely with my interests and long-term goals—but I wasn’t selected. I did get through to about the 3rd / 4th rounds of interviews.

Now, I feel stuck. Should I keep pushing forward with job applications, even though the process is so draining? Or should I consider pursuing further certifications, like the CFA or CFP, to enhance my qualifications? Though i’m aware a bachelor’s isn’t worth much anymore in the market these days, ’m hesitant to go back to studying again because I had hoped my degree alone would help me secure a fulfilling job.

I love business & finance, and I also particularly enjoy any industry in tech, cars, or anything that involves human interaction. However, the thought of spending 39 more years in a job like my current one feels unbearable. I’m at a crossroads, unsure of how to move forward, and I fear getting permanently stuck in this unfulfilling career path. Any advice would be appreciated.

I have asked him previously 3 times. The last time I asked him is when he asked me for a favor to stay late and finish this project. So I did and he came and helped me. While he was helping me thought this was a good ppportunity to bring it up again. And he said 1 promise l'll get you a raise. The anual raise of 50cent is coming up in January that was another 2 months ago. He has been saying it for 5 months now. Should 1 keep bringing it up?

26, part of a graduate program that will end next year in July. I have been with my current manager for half a year now.

I asked my manager if there is a place for me in the team (it is essentially just my manager and I in the team) after my time in the program is over.

They saw that they can see a place for me in the team but I would need to write up a job proposal. In short, the proposal should outline my desired tasks and responsibilities within the team, as well as where I would like to be stationed.

My manager would then present it to their boss for approval and with that said

"...it does not mean you will get it..."

My managers boss is the director of the entire department and vets everyone in the team before they are hired. Interviewing even the interns before approving them into the program.

Their repsonse was not negative but not too optimistic either, should I be worried?

Anyone with experince of writing up proposals like this previously?

Hi! I completed my Bachelor’s degree in Computer Science from Singapore. I tried looking for a job there but couldn’t land any. I continued looking for a job in India. It’s been a year since I have been looking for a job and I keep getting ghosted or rejected by companies. I am tired and hopeless.

This whole process has affected my mental health and I don’t have the energy left to apply as I am assuming that I will receive a rejection or not receive any response at all. I have upskilled myself and I have made myself interview ready. I have made my resume ATS compliant and still I am barely getting interview opportunities. My future seems blurry to me and I don’t know what should I do.

Has anyone worked at Kiwibank as a banking assistant? If so, what is the pay like and also what is the potential growth like?

Would you recommend me as someone with bachelor in automation engineering to do a second bachelor in computer science? Or should i opt instead for a graduate diploma or master degree in computer science?

For info: My degree was from Algeria which i wouldnt say the universities are ranked that high globally, and am currently in canada, and thinking about pursuing education here.

The main issue is i have a very low gpa, so it is hard for me to apply for a graduate program.

What do you suggest?

I want to know how you would make the decisions. Which factors you assign the most importance.

I'm 28 years old, no college degree. I worked for about 3 years in human resources as a recruiter and enjoyed the job. Thought I would stay there forever. I wanted to work in the medical field to test the waters, however found out I hated it. Ever since then, I have been job hopping from job to job, I'm depressed and pregnant. I'm currently 30k in cc debt and honestly, I feel like such a disappointment. I've tried to get back into HR however, all of these hiring managers require college degrees.

I feel hopeless and like a complete idiot. How can I move on from this? I feel irresponsible to have a new job that I hate every 3 months. Honestly, very disappointed in my career, I thought I would have it all figured out by now. At this point I have no idea what to do? Do I continue looking for an hr role or give up and find something else.

i graduated in 2020 with a bachelors degree in athletic training. after getting my license and working as an AT for a year i decided i hated it. worked a ton of hours and was severely underpaid. since, i’ve been bartending/serving because my salary has doubled doing that than the degree i paid thousands of dollars for.

i’m feeling very lost and hopeless because not a lot excites me when i think of a future career. i need to make a career change and have been over thinking every option. i’m willing to go back and get a masters, preferably online so i can work in the meantime. some thoughts i had (deff all over the place) were ultrasound tech, HR, healthcare admin, public health. has anyone been in this position and do you have any advice?

So i thought i had my life planned out, but after talking to professors and doing more research, it may not be as good as i had thought.

Ive been interested in psychology for a bit and wanted to teach it because why not talk about something you enjoy and are passionate about to other people for them to learn? Check the job description, about $80,000 a year, sounds good to me.

Apparently its not all that good, everyone has told me its not worth it. That theres no jobs open and it takes ages to be full-time. Not to mention PhD’s arent easy to get and take years to get one. I dont want to be drowned in student debt because i was stuck in college going for a career that has no outcome.

I thought about maybe music therapy since i can play guitar, but someone i know went into that and had to find another job because he didnt make any money and couldn’t afford to live.

I dont know what job to go into, or what to major in. I feel lost now. Im left with the question what do i want to do in life now that i know what ive been wanting to do for 3 years isnt worth it? Where do i even start to look elsewhere?

Hello, I 24f have a lot of knowledge regarding art and teaching art, I'm a art instructor for a company sparatically through the months, and I'm a arts and crafts specialist at a summer camp (seasonal) but no certifications (Im a sophomore in college, BFA focus in illustration) my goal with going to school is to get involved in the art world and get the social skills to be an illustrator (getting jobs etc) I've tried to make a buisness selling art and doing commissions but I just don't have that buisness gene or whatever. I was a welder out of highschool but the combination of dangerous working conditions and sexual harassment turned me off to it. Does anyone have any suggestion for jobs that I can do while in school that involves art and doesn't need decades of experience? I want experience but I don't know what to look into.

I work as a performance marketing manager and make $130k + 15% annual bonus of the salary. My job has to do with planning the annual media budget + handling agency partner relationships, and media strategy for DTC and Amazon globally. Its a 100M+ business

I live in the Bay Area if that helps

Please before I get dogged on understand that I have realistic expectations I (18 and very confused) am at a hard point already, I don’t know what my passion is and I don’t know how to find it, I went down a rabbit hole online looking at all these people who have chased things they’ve loved and made it, I know that life is a fickle beast and alot is luck and hardwork in school but for an average guy who wasn’t great in school is there a way I could chase my passion here? I’ve been playing video games since I was three and since then I haven’t ever felt like I’ve been good at much else, to stop me from rambling, anyone out there come from the same place?

Edit: I want to apologize for not at all writing a good post, I was super panicked and just suddenly felt like the world was crashing because I didn’t know what I wanted to do, what I should have said was that I am just a little lost, I am a (I like to think) above average guy who’s never been good at traditional schooling but I’m very good at things I am interested in, my one big thing is gaming, I’ve been playing video games all my life and while I know the tech field at large is pretty awful at the moment I wonder if that’s where I’d find something to strive for, I’m not any better than the average 13 yo playing Fortnite on his twitch in fact I like solo games and I hate competition, I just sort of wanted to see if anyone had been there done that and had advice, all advice is good advice to me as I feel pretty lost!

As the title say, I repeat to myself everyday, be thankful of what you got. The job market is hard, Don’t always complain. Do you job, go home and look for something else. But deep down I feel like I am lying to myself. I feel l am gaslighting myself, my feeling of not being happy with my work situation is not true.

My job is way to stress for me. There are way Too much work assignment, not enough supports, every conversation with my staff feels like a war. Manager is always dingling a carrot in front of me, that I know what she promise is not true

How do I slack off on my job?? And developed a I don’t care mindset?? When my boss ask me about status what should I say?? When my staff ask me about updates how can I just don’t answer??

Yes I am one of those people who do take my duties seriously and it’s stressing me out all the time.

I’ll try and condense this as much as I can.

I’m currently 24 years old and I still live at home, no bills to pay or groceries to pay for, I recognize how fortunate, blessed, and lucky I am.

I worked as a Marketing Database Administrator for just over a year after graduating college with a BBA in Information Technology and three months ago, I took a different job much further away as a Financial Analyst thinking it’d be the path I wanted to go into. Spoiler alert: I hate and dread it. My direct supervisor is great, he treats me wonderfully, but there is a lot of toxicity in the workplace between departments. One of my coworkers has not been welcoming at all since I was hired, and EVERYTHING that comes out of his mouth is negative. If I mention how my weekend was rough, he tells me that he drinks four glasses of bourbon before bed every night and how horrible his health is; he always has to be the most miserable person in the office.

I go to therapy every other Friday, and even she told me it’d be unwise to quit a job without having another one set up along with most people around me. I have already sent out applications and reached out to people at those companies on LinkedIn to maybe get a foot in the door, so it’s not like I’m sitting on my butt doing nothing about it. However, if this job is coming at the expense of my own mental health, I can’t help but wonder if it’s even worth it at this point.

As mentioned above, I still live at home and have a lot saved up from my old job, so I think I’d be in a good place if I did put in my two week notice. I’m still very early in my professional career and frankly have no idea what I want to do, so maybe a month or so to figure it out until hiring starts back up in January wouldn’t be a bad thing.

Does anyone have any advice or can shed some insightful light on this?

Hi everyone.

Im 5 months away from finishing a bachelor of international business management in Canada.

I could either wait 4 years and work towards a citizenship or leave for an mba in China. Im 20yo btw.

Thanks for your advice.

I’m a 25f psychology graduate (BSc and MSc) struggling to enter the job market due to a lack of experience. The pandemic disrupted my opportunity to gain work experience during my degree, and I went straight into a master’s, assuming it would improve my prospects.

Now, I’m more aware of my strengths and career goals, aiming for roles with high salary potential (£50k–£100k) and progression opportunities. I’m particularly interested in industrial-organizational psychology but find it challenging to find reliable information about the field, especially salary data for London.

I’d love to hear if anyone has any advice or knowledge on how to break into this field, gain relevant qualifications, and secure roles with strong earning potential.

Hi guys,

I’m a 24F and I have a BA in International Relations/MA in International Development. I took a lot of data analysis classes in R.

After college I just fell into a care coordinator job at an MLTC. I know it doesn’t have to do with my degree but I do like healthcare and would preferably like to stay in it.

Now I started working for a hospital as a discharge planner. I honestly don’t plan on staying for long, I just wanted to get my foot in the door but I was just wondering if I have any options for career growth being that I don’t have a medical background. I am interested in working in data or research in healthcare, just don’t know how hard it is to switch departments at hospitals and given I don’t necessarily have a degree in data analytics.

I just feel a little lost but my goal is to make more money in the future so I can eventually live on my own and I aspire to travel. I also would love to maybe merge healthcare and international studies like maybe work for the world health organization or something like that. I just know it’s hard to get into organizations like that.

Thank you

Hey Reddit,

So, I just got my first post grad job offer (still not quite sure how), and I’m super excited... but also terrified because I have NO CLUE how to handle the salary negotiation part this friday. 

CONTEXT: I just graduated with a BCom Degree and got offered an entry-level role at a mid-sized company, and the offer seems decent, but I keep hearing, you should always negotiate. Now I’m wondering if I’d be leaving money on the table if I didn’t at least try.

Here’s a couple questions that I am hoping for some thoughts on:

• Is it ever a bad idea to negotiate salary? If so, when?
• What’s the best way to phrase a counteroffer without coming across as greedy or ungrateful?
• What is realistic regarding things like benefits, flexible hours, remote work, or a signing bonus?
• How do I follow up to ensure any agreed-upon terms are put in writing?
• What should I do if I don’t have competing job offers to strengthen my case?

I really don’t want to blow this, but I also don’t want to accept less than I’m worth. Any advice from those of you who’ve been through this before is greatly appreciated I’d really like to hear your personal experiences and different opinions!

Thanks in advance for your help seriously! 

It is my last week of an abusive job. My dad scolded me on planning to quit same-day (at will state, 30 yo, gave this org 5 years of my 20s, good ol boys club environment with screaming and offensive comments, nonstop conservative politics). This will ensure I witness my earned bonus from the last year and my two months retroactive pay increase IN MY BANK ACCOUNT. If I give a week notice (much better job starts following week and I did not want to delay it any further so I can escape my job and attend the new job's holiday party)- there is a high chance of passive aggressive, abusive language and either firing me next day and/or "forgetting/rescinding" my bonus and back pay raise.

Instead of feeling bad, recovering emotionally from that, being short literally $3000 of earned wages and fussing with an employment lawyer when I am supposed to be celebrating my new job and having a relaxed mind all week, I am choosing to give one-day notice (politely and professionally citing "medical, personal and professional reasons" and directing them to a server folder with prepped work and training documents for my tasks).

I could really use some support and encouragement. My own father questioned my "character" saying "it was the wrong thing to do." This is the same guy who left me behind with a literal child abuser at 9yo aside from child support and a few visits per year. Child protective services rescued me from her out of the hospital just before turning 18.

I don't want to hear about "morals and character" from someone who is willing to let me be abused by both my mom and this workplace. He said if I give my notice and THEN they act pissy about it, I can move it up to that day. How is that "moral" but ignoring 3.5 years of abuse leading up to the notice permissable, and I am immoral for doing same day from the jump? Ugh.

I am an adult. This is an at-will employment state. My boss has reminded me of this repeatedly as some sort of weird, passive-aggressive threat despite positive performance review. I am just spending 3 days of my weekend stressed when I should be celebrating the new offer which is +25% pay, paid holidays, PTO, remote flexibility and higher seniority. Something the good old boy's club refuses to give me and has promoted my male peer above us women peers who have the same responsibilities and been on the same time. Except she is treated worse in the sense that they question if she will have more kids, including our new "supervisor" at her anniversary lunch.... I am not tied down and I want my $3000 I am owed Friday, then quit same-day and never look back. In terms of references, I could get several but after 4 years of sacrificing my mental health and career progression in an attempt to endear myself to "good old boys", I am ready to walk. The senior mgrs has made suicide, rape, terrorism, gender based and school shooting "jokes" in office just in the last 4 months alone. He used to wink at me for a year straight until I started staring straight ahead with my earbuds in.

I feel like even my mentor, a senior manager for many years at this org, said take your cash and run (at-will employment). I just need a lot of support and encouragement because I am not getting it from my own family who is now questioning my character over a matter of a few weeks notice.

I’m 21, working a $15/hr landscaping job, and becoming a dad soon. I want to make more to support my partner and baby.

I kindly ask for advice on building a career that allows me to:

• Earn $5-10K/month.
• Balance work and family time
• Align with my strengths: (communication, public speaking, building connections, leadership, and creative roles like photo/video editing, branding, organization).
• Avoid repetitive, office work.

I’m considering:

• Real estate (agent or wholesaling).
• Digital marketing.
• Sales.
• Photography.
• Starting a Christian podcast.

I’m open to learning high-income skills for long-term growth!

I'm not sure if this belongs here... but I cant seem to get over my anger towards my old owners. It was a small company and I worked 60-70 hour weeks on a salary with no raises for years and no OT pay. I was on call 24-7 and micromanaged like crazy. I worked hard to create a good team and be second leading store in the business. I had issues with the owners wife, who was heavily involved in the business and almost 95% of employees did not like her due to how she treated them. She was rude and raised a privileged life, so she projected that onto most people thinking they needed to "work harder" at their minimum wage jobs.

I got demoted and was asked to train my replacement who was hired behind my back, no prior PIP plans or writes up... I was completely blind sided. My replacement was hired on at a 10k higher wage than me with almost the same amount of experience. I left, because f**k that place but I'm still mad. I want to send mean emails and create fake google accounts and leave 1-star reviews. (It was part of my bonus to get 5-star google reviews in certain volumes each month and I managed to get the store up by .2 stars while there which was a big deal).

I'm upset. I want them to pay for abusing my hard work and taking advantage of me. I don't know how to let it go. I'm tired of being walked over by people with money and big egos but It's also not helpful for me to feel this rage. I know for a fact they break LNI and OASHA laws and I want to report them but I don't know if that's right. I just want to move on....

I’m a 17 yo girl and I genuinely have no clue what to do. I thought I was interested in psychiatry but a lot of my teachers are making me feel as if I won’t even make it thru pre med.

Keep in mind that my interests range a LOT, so this post is just a jumble of my thoughts at this rate.

I love science for the most part, but without a doctorate I don’t think I’m gonna get much money. I’m not into the whole drawing blood thing, I think it would be fun to be a lab tech but idk if I can live off that or not. I have no money for college and no scholarships, my school has barely prepared me so I don’t even know how to get them. It’s not like I’m bad in school, I’m an AP and Honors student with a 3.8 cumulative GPA.

I’m considering taking a trade to be an automobile mechanic but I’ve never even tried anything having to do with fixing a car. All I know is that it seems fun. Is that even worth it? Some people say the moneys good, others say it’s shit. I also don’t know if I’d like it because I hated my wood working and CAD engineering class. Then again, I’m not sure if those things relate to being a mechanic…

Overall, I’m not sure what to go into. I love science to a degree, but doubt I’m gonna make it thru a doctorate. Might be self esteem talking tho, I can’t tell. Maybe it’s senioritis.

Do I go thru with some sort of science doctorate, or jump into that mechanic trade? Are there any other options for me? I’m so lost it’s kinda scary lol. (P.S: I’m not the greatest with putting salary into perspective, so I might just be worrying over nothing. I work part time in retail so I don’t look at my yearly income for the most part)

I'm in a weird position where my current responsibilities are a little shaky and ill-defined, but currently I'm tasked to help out around the office writing scripts to help automate and value-add tasks that my coworkers see as wasted time. This at the moment involves data entry and light automation though I'm very passionate about what I do and see it as a way of taking away the boring parts of work while empowering my coworkers to spend their time more effectively.

It's only been a few days that I've been working at this company, and to be entirely honest, I do not know my job title. It's a very informal business but I'm clocking in and they're formal enough to pay me for my time.

The people I speak with (friends, and family) are telling me I shouldn't take work home, especially tasks that I'm doing at home that I could be getting paid for but I really want to refine them and see them to completion. My dream job involves software engineering and this sort of feels like it, with the perks of very low expectations and very high autonomy.

I should also mention that due to how ill-defined my tasks are, I'm not entirely sure of how long I will be tasked to do this. I feel a level of anxiety attached to not performing 120% in worry that I won't be as free to do this in the future but given how happy my boss seems to be with my performance currently it might just be me finding a mental justification that allows me to work more.

I am a 23 year old junior (at a university now) and I have been in community college on an off for 5 years in computer science. On top of all of the negativity associated with the field these days, I am finding hard to even just be an average student. I commute to school over an hour one way, I don't do spectacular on assignments, and I'm on track to failing my first two classes after transfering (passing one with an A or B depending) which will make my financial aid disappear.

I've been doing some thinking lately and this might not be the field for me. I took so many classes only to not really pay attention in the end and the only thing I have to show is an Associates degree piece of paper.

I am based in california (went to a california community college) so my question is would I be able to switch majors into a different engineering field with most of my credits completed at a community college? Or am I going to have to start over again from square 1? I think my university has a credit limit where if its above 90 in a certain major you can't switch if you are a transfer student. So I would probably have to switch majors and start in community college, but hopefully not from scratch. Does anyone know about the college system here and what I could do?

The age thing is scaring me honestly. I never thought i would be at 23 years old so fast but here I am. I just want a stable high paying career at this point and this time I'll fix my study habits. on top of that I will have one or two F's on my transcript from this university so I really hate the position I put myself in. The quarter has not ended yet though so I'm trying to study as much as possible.

I work full-time as an accounting clerk and have been in the role for about a month. When I first met my manager, he was friendly and laid-back, but his attitude has since changed, and now we hardly communicate. He often calls me out for not understanding basic Excel functions, and sometimes it feels like he’s testing me on purpose to make me look bad in front of my colleague. He gets frustrated if I approach tasks differently from him, even when my method is correct. I’m not trying to reinvent the wheel, but there are often multiple ways to solve a problem, and despite getting the right answer, he still seems upset with me. He knows I get nervous around him, and it affects my ability to think and perform tasks due to his toxic behavior. He mentioned wanting to talk to me about this, saying it’s “tough love” and that we should talk man to man. Is this behavior toxic, or am I just being too sensitive?

I'm currently a senior in college and I'm about to start putting in job applications soon. I want to do pharmaceutical sales, but I currently have no experience so I'm only pursuing entry level pharmaceutical sales jobs or companies that have sales departments to get experience. Most of the jobs pay ranges from $23-$30 hourly. I want to ask for no less than $25. Is that unreasonable? Keep in mind a degree is not required for most of these jobs but it is preferable. Should I ask for more than $25? If I shoot too high, will I shoot myself in the foot?

So I’m seeking some advice. We’ve got a temporary team leader who’s been pretty bad overall (I’ll call her L). But one of the worst parts is that L openly criticizes people who have trained or supported her. It first started with L criticizing the person who trained her for 3 months; she brought this up in my 1-1 when I asked a question that I think she didn’t have the answer to (it became a “X didn’t train me in this so I don’t know). I was uncomfortable but at least felt like she was “punching in her own weight class.”

I just tried to re-direct the conversation and ignore it. However, since then, L has openly criticized 3 other people in “acting” deputy team leader roles. She has done this in group chats and in meetings. Quite frankly, I’m sick of it and think it’s pretty inappropriate. And most of my team agrees. We’re short-staffed so people are “stepping” into deputy team leader roles to help her, while she was hired to be in the team leader role.

I’m planning on addressing it with her individually before raising it with anyone above her. I’m planning on just simply saying that it makes me uncomfortable to hear her criticize my peers, especially when we’re all being expected to “act up” because of staffing shortages. That it makes me concerned about what criticism I’ll receive when it’s my turn.

Anyone have any thoughts of anything else I should say? I expect she’ll be a bit defensive. I’m not worried about this changing my own job stability. And I know that some other peers have gone above her head to complain about it. I would just prefer to address it directly (going above her makes me feel like it’s “tattling”, which I can do. But I’d rather avoid)