So I have this weird tract record that men I talk to randomly have to move right when things get serious. I’ve been talking to this guy and we were starting to seriously get into our relationship and something came up financially so now he has to move back home (different state)- also we’re early 20s/college age. I just don’t get wtf is up with that. This has been the THIRD time this has happened to me (all separate men and relationships). I feel like it’s my fault bc how is this happening???? I even told him about how weird my past has been and felt secure telling him bc I never thought he would be also moving, atleast this soon!!!! So I guess really the advice I’m looking for is — do I continue to date around or should I take a break? I feel numb at this point as I kinda expect these men to up and move out of my life after a few months bc that’s keep on happening. Idk it’s just depressing bc I really form great bonds with these men and it always has to end abruptly. I also feel like it’s too soon to even think about long distance as we’ve been talking for about 3-4 months. This was the same deal with previous relationships— they weren’t long enough to really think about long distance as they were just starting to get more serious. Idk what I’m really asking but if anyone has advice on what they’d do or how they’d go about dating at this point I’d appreciate it bc I’m just at a loss right now.

I'm 18, just graduated highschool and I don't know what I'm doing right now. I don't know how to start this and structure this but this is everything going on right now. 

1. I always loved music and I make rap music. I have a decent following and my following and numbers keep going up steadily but I don't know if I even like making the music I make for real anymore. I talked about guns, drugs, and women and I realized I don't want my future kids hearing me even talk about stuff like that. I told everyone around me and even myself I'm always gonna live my life for my passion and I still have a passion for music and I love rap but I feel like I will regret choosing this route.

2. Other than music I don't know my passions or interests. This one is my biggest problem right now. My best friend is a super interesting and cool person, he knows what he likes. He likes music, he wants to go to japan, he loves cooking good food, he is really really passionate about cars like he just knows himself. All I know is I like making music and clothes. I don't know who i am it feels like.

3. I feel like I'm going to miss out if i dont go to college. I don't even know what i would go to college for but i feel like i'm missing an opportunity to grow and meet new people which leads me to #4

4. I feel lonely. I have one super close friend and my gf then that's it. All my other friends we kinda grew apart like they still liked video games and i didnt anymore and they like doing stuff i just isn't into anymore. I have one-three friends and that's it. I feel lonely

Tldr; 18 just graduated highschool rethinking my passion, realized i don't know who i am, feel like i'm missing an opportunity by not going to college, and i feel lonely.

I have been dating a girl for close to eleven months here tomorrow and the relationship is positive, in fact there were times I didn't know about the relationship though at this time it appears to be mostly overwhelmingly positive. It is a relationship we are spending all morning and afternoon talking about at this point. It helps she really likes my doggg. As the relationship has proceeded starting back there are times we didn't know about the relationship and each other, the idea of us getting to be together, share in good times and be there for each other in bad times (and those may not be mutually exclusive), though as the relationship has proceeded things are really setting up for us to have a relationship where each other are in each other's lives and spending time together though at this time it is a relationship where things are complicated in terms of us being together.

She really has a way of making me sit up straight and type out my thoughts with her such that we can share in things together, and she is pretty good about making things happen a certain way that the both of us are sharing in good times together. I like the idea of the relationship and after reviewing things it appears she is very much there for myself where as I am very much there for her. It helps that she has a totally beautiful body and funny personality. We are putting the relationship together and personally I like the idea of us getting to try things out so we are doing that though at this time we already know the relationship and are doing our best to be there for each other. I think it is showing that as we continue talking we have grown closer, especially through the games we have played which are showing to be really something.

It may just be we are still talking about each other and being in the relationship where the both of us can have things completely set up for each other (🤭), it is complicated to say what she is really looking for though after the third month of us dating I knew things were going to be awesome, though in reality I think we knew the instant we met that a connection was possible to form between each other. So we are still talking, and as we are still talking and finding out the story it is complicated to really say where things are. Her bff helps her and myself out in terms of getting us together all of the time and we make quite an image of us being together I have to add. She has this really cute hoodie that she wears that is just present in my mind now in terms of us dating and personally I think it looks great on her, she does a lot of planning and thinking around this kind of stuff so it is a great relationship.

I am busy thinking of things I can do to be there for her now. Any love taps in the relationship count for a lot in terms of each other and personally I try to give those to her as much as I can because she really sends.

Any advice is appreciated, thank you. ❤️ ⚡️ 😁

Hello everyone, Im 26 yo, i'm kinda lost on what's going on for me where am i going, actually i'm working and stacking money but for which purpose ? I have no clue of what i am going to do with and i wanted to know for my future if it's a good idea to stay in my birth country or to immigrate to a better one ? Actually i live in France, some people can enjoy living here but for my personal case i don't really enjoy this country. It's possible to learn experiences by yourself and usually i do this by myself but for this case sadly i don't have a 500 yo lifespan to go to each country to live in enough to know if i enjoy the country or not, so that's why i come here, to seek some advices and some experiences of people who maybe were in my case and what did they do, are you living in a good cool and welcoming country with a good life quality. I also know everyone has it's own perspective about what is cool / good in a country and what's bad so that's why if you answer me i'll ask you to give me some argments with your answer to help me to weight the advantages and disadvantages.

I'll also add that some friends adviced me to go to Quebec since i'm french and i know how to speak french, they told me it's like France but with a better life quality, security and more nature. This look like very promising but i wonder if "the grass is always greener on the other side" and i have not more informations about it so if someone can confirm if it's true or false ?

I think i've explained enough my situation and the purpose of this post so i'm open to any opinion from all of you as long as its something relevant. And i want to apologize if this post might be a little confused i tried to be as clear as possible. Otherwise i want to thank you for taking time for me and i wish you to have a good day.

i’m genuinely asking because it could be? i know that everyone has intrusive thoughts so maybe they manifest when we are sleeping and come out at night, or something. recently i had a dream about bashing another girls skull in (i just wanted to help her, she wasn’t thinking straight). then i realized that i have dreams like these fairly often and started to wonder if they were normal/if everyone had them. i feel pretty silly asking this tbh- but i need to know if i should be concerned or not

He never shaves his private areas no matter what we are doing but whenever we are about to get ready to go out to a strip club as a couple he always does a everything shower and shave, is this weird or is it just me?

I (27M) have been dating my girlfriend (22F) for around 6 months. She’s super sweet, smart, and beautiful but about a month into our relationship she told me that she was a virgin and she wanted to take things slow, I’m perfectly fine with this, I do worry what she’ll think of me when we do have sex though. I’ve been in and out of the bdsm scene before, I don’t want to scare her, but I also feel ready for the next step. We’ve made out a lot and recently she let me eat her out, it was super fun but I’ve never waited this long to have sex with anyone since I was in high school. I’ve only really dated girls who were in the bdsm scene, she hasn’t expressed any interest in it, at least not so far.

I think I’m in love her and I don’t want to mess up, I know that if I’m going to tell her about my kinks and stuff I need to do it soon. I’m into things like choking, slapping, bruising, degradation, cnc, and other bad things. I’m very dominant in bed but I tried my best to be gentle with her when eating her out since I know she’d never done anything like it before. I don’t want to spring it on her in the middle of sex like some kind of idiot since I know those kinds of things can mess with people. I do fantasize about doing those hardcore things with her though. I just don’t want her to freak out and leave me, I’m honestly okay with being on the more vanilla side if it means I can still have her in my life.

I (24M) know a lot of people and hang out with a lot of people. I have known these people for about 4 years now; however, I don’t consider them my ‘friends.’ Sure, I know them. Yes, I text and hang out with them, but they aren’t my friends—more or less my acquaintances. I say this because I don’t have ‘friends.’ I had one friend in high school. She texted me every day, told me she loved me, and even named her dog after me. But after high school, we lost contact (it was mainly my fault; I ghosted her). After that, I developed a really high bar when it comes to friendship. My old friend texted me all the time and named her dog after me. It’s pretty hard for me to call someone my friend or say I care about them if they don’t fit that bar. I personally think people use the term “friend” way to fucking loosely.

I have one ‘friend,’ and that’s my girlfriend of three years (30F). I like her family and her siblings, but even they aren’t really my friends since I don’t hang out with them a lot. What do you think?

A week ago my mom confronted my dad through a phone call about the bra she found at his apartment. She found it weeks or months ago but just confronted him now.

My sister heard the confrontation and told it to me. My parents are not aware that we know everything. I had a feeling my dad was cheating cuz of some stuff we found on his apartment when me and my siblings visited. But i found hard evidence when i made an account in a messaging app. I dont know how but somehow my dad's contacts are coming out to mine. I found out that he names his sugar babies in uniform(not going to go in details). And through the app i discovered he has a lot of sugar babies, i think he is seeing one consistently.

Mom doesnt plan on telling me whats happening, so should i leave these evidences be?

I'm currently working on a small legal firm where I only make money if I get some clients and they pay me for each stance of the process, so if in a month I don't have a new client I make little money and if another month I get 5 or 6 new clients I make a lot more, but I love the place, my colleagues, the freedom on my time "I work from 9 to 14:00" and I really enjoy representing people, but I got an offer for a job at a government office, as deputy director of the legal area and would have a stable and very reasonable salary, but I don't really like the administrative law. I'm thinking what would happen if I don't like the new job, as it would be very hard to get a job like the one I'm in now in terms of the freedom of time and decision-making

I'm paying $500 a month with a 10 K max out of pocket and am finding most people do not pay this much. I'm thinking about quitting my job.

Should I quit due to this? I make about 50 K a year.

Hi, I'm asking for some insight into what people think regarding my thoughts on porn.

I like porn, I think it can be really affirming and eye opening and also just be a nice addition to the atmosphere during self pleasure or even sex. However, I am very conflicted on different kinds of porn as I am a queer feminist through and through and just hate that some women in the industry are forced or when there's unethical workplace settings in general. I also hate that sex workers are degraded as they are and want sex workers of all kinds to be empowered and in control of their body and their business.

In the past, I've been in a relationship with someone who had a secret twitter account for watching porn and by liking videos, he saved them. Two of them clearly depicted minors who were in public places and having sex with each other and filming it. He was 27 at the time. This discovery has left me pretty scarred and I am now always afraid that men I'm with are secretly creeps and perverts who don't know ethics and find things arousing that are actually really terrible to find arousing.

Now I am in a relationship with someone who's been raised catholic. They are pretty open and queer too and just a lovely person. However, in the past, they had a problem with me being naked on the beach, which is a very common thing to do where I live. I also live in a city that has a thriving nudist scene with naked karaoke and other things popping up. They have been mid supportive but also struggling a bit with the thought of me being nude around other people in a non sexual way.

On the other hand, I have been asking what kind of porn they consume (as per my worries) and it has been an ongoing conversation. At first, they were really defensive and protective. I later learnt that they reacted that way because porn was labelled as bad or taboo entirely in their household and they did not really get sexual or body hygiene education from their parents. This means they became sensitive to controlling or condemning attitudes to their sexuality, because they're at a place where they don't feel shame for having a sexuality anymore. I'm really happy for them about that but at the same time, I find some things worrying and there were some things I wasn't okay with. They used to consume pornographic content in Instagram and used to consume cam girl like content. I expressed that for me, that behaviour is outside of monogamy and I wouldn't feel comfortable being with someone who looked at sexual content that is produced by a single person in front of a camera as I feel like I could do the same for them and would love to, but don't want to be competing or be compared to other people. Basically, in that regard, I want to be monogamous. So nudes, videos stripping it masturbating, taking dirty into the cam, are all things I'd like to keep mutually exclusive in relationships that I have. They accepted that and stopped consuming porn in Instagram. However, they have since taken to Reddit and as I'm quite familiar with Reddit, most porn subs consist of nudes and little clips produced by members and sex workers advertising.

I have also mentioned wanting to get into pole dance and potentially wanting to perform on stage if I become any good. They have expressed that they wouldn't be okay with me performing on stage. With their friends, the have attended a sex workers event (which is actually a really cool event) and have supported the sex workers there.

Now to my thoughts: I feel like something is a bit double standards here. If it is okay for them to watch these types of things, it should be okay for me to be casually nude, to perform pole dance in front of other people and if I wanted to, even post in those porn subs. I can't really explain why but I feel like this is double standards because either they should stop going to pole dance shows or consuming porn that is produced by one person only, or I should be able to produce this kind of dtuff without there being a problem. What makes me different from the people producing this and performing? And why are there different rules for producing it and consuming it?

Would love to have your insight :) I hope I made myself clear and didn't offend or hurt anyone. Have a good evening!

TLDR: I feel like there are double standards in my relationship relating to nudity, porn and sex work in general.

i’m feeling lost.

I went to school and graduated with a post seconds try diploma in sound engineering last year in March 2023 and have had zero luck in finding a job.

Im interested in music and want to become a music artist but I feel like it’s hopeless I have been trying since I was 12 to make it happen.

I don’t want to do anything else other than music and sound which sucks because it’s a really tough industry and very up and down and right now I crave a stable career.

i’m broke asf. shitty apartment. wtf i can’t live like this.

what to do?

How should I choose: pursue my dream of attending medical school and remain in my home country indefinitely, or follow a path in graphic design abroad, which could later give me the opportunity to move to the USA as I've always wanted? P.s: Right now I’m at an university I don’t like and I’m thinking of choosing something else!

I'm in Chicago and don't really know how/if I should be trying to meet more people. I have like a few friends from high school/college and that's it. I've tried using Meetup/Eventbrite but to be honest a lot of doesn't seem that interesting. Do people just go to bars and start conversations solo at all? I'm 24 if that makes a difference.

I had COVID for the first time on 02/28/24. The first three days were pretty rough with a 39°C fever, body aches, etc., but these symptoms subsided within the next week. After six days, I tested negative again and hoped things would start looking up. However, after 2.5 weeks, I suddenly experienced a sore throat and difficulty swallowing again. Stupidly, I still went to the gym twice, but haven’t been back since. Now, more than a month has passed, and I still have breathing and concentration problems. Even the slightest exertion, like biking, climbing stairs, or carrying something light, knocks me out completely.

I’ve been passionate about strength training for 10 years, and in recent months, I also discovered a love for running. It’s so frustrating to feel like I’m living the life of a retiree and can’t do any sports anymore. I’m really worried that I might have Long COVID and will have to live like this for the next few months. The lack of exercise has also made me lose interest in everything I used to enjoy. This sounds a bit depressing, but I just miss my old life so much. I’m usually such a happy person and love life, but this past month has shown me how quickly things can change.

Have any of you experienced similar symptoms? Did they eventually go away

Hello! I 24f living in NYC and in a bit of a pickle. I do not get paid until this upcoming Friday and my landlord is demanding rent today. I unfortunately had a death in the family and had to help which took all my savings. Is there anything I can do to come up with the money or a place I can go because it is due today and he responded to me today and said no.

Piece of shit is burning plastic one day, copper wires the other.
Police also won't do shit, what can I even do? Fucking retard.

We are in a house, location, neighborhood we really like. But we recently got new neighbors. They are just odd and tbh make me uncomfortable.

There’s nothing super specific just various little things. But their presence just makes you uncomfortable and just feels off.

They are extremely unfriendly, never say hi, even after we welcomed them to the neighborhood. Their young kids are always outside unattended and always using curse words around our little kids. We can always hear screaming in their house. The kids seem like kids that would set fire to our house as a prank and the parent honestly just give me the creeps.

I know that’s a lot of judgement. But it makes me love my house less because of them.

Thoughts?

Since my only irl crush is someone who let’s just say I’m afraid to go anywhere with, I’ve been trying to find other dating options. I’m not able to go places much due to not currently having a license (something I am trying to change), but I think myself the type that’s up for whatever if it’s with the right person. I’ve tried asking girls out irl, but the few times I did, I always got rejected. Most of the time, I was so nervous and shy that I only ever sat back and hoped for the best.

So, that’s were online dating comes in and that’s been an absolute crapshoot. The only thing I get less often than matches on Tinder and the like is actual dates. And when I do get matches, most either ignore me or disappear entirely. Even when I do get a response it often leads to a conversation that’s either one sided or goes nowhere. Sure, there are definitely exceptions where it leads to them expressing interest in me and in turn gaining more confidence. However, literally all of them have been scammers/sex workers trying to butter me up so they can get money from me in some form or another.

I want to keep an open mind, but considering my history, it’s so hard to. I’m looking for any ways I can improve this situation I’ve found myself in. Anything would be very much appreciated.

Its been 6 months since i graduated from college and ive reached a point where i feel like i have plateaued and i haven’t been productive. I have always been an overachiever and not doing much for the last 6 months feels like it has reset my brain into not having any willingness to do anything.

usually i am a motivation oriented person and i have immense plans and ideas that i need to execute but lately i feel like i dont have the discipline or the motivation to do them. I have this constant feeling of how i am wasting all my potential because i know that i can achieve a lot of success and fame if i should shut the fuck up and do it. I feel like i am in a loop where everytime i think about the things i want to do, i get excited about them but the moment i think about executing them i feel really afraid and end up sleeping on it.

I just want to be able to get out of this mindset, i feel stuck and i feel that im constantly under pressure just thinking about how much i am afraid lately.

Hi, so, for context I 18M met this group of people online during the pandemic over a discord server. During the pandemic for some reason I wanted to be quirky or what have you and lied about both my age and my ethnicity. I'm an 18 y.o romanian-american, but for some reason I pretended to be a 2+ year older british-romanian. I guess 14 year old me got a kick out of being different. The problem is, in the 4 years since we first met, me and about 4 ish other people have grown really close and are planning a meet up. I am actually currently living in the UK for school, so the issue isn't the actual meet up or whatever since they probably wouldn't be able to tell I'm a fraud just from meeting me but I feel generally guilty anyway. I'm also trying to publish a book, and if any single one of them looks up my full name they'll see my high school graduation and piece it together. I really want to come clean, but I don't know how to do it, when to do it, or whatever. I've only really lied about where I live, where I went to school, and how old I am but idk if this will have too major consequences on my relationship. Help? How do I come clean to my friends? And do I wait a few years to do it once it becomes a problem with the book thing, or do I just come clean now before the meet up?

Met this girl a few weeks back when I was with some friends. Followed me on Instagram afterwards, I followed her back, liked a couple posts, she liked a couple of mine. I liked one of her stories, and very soon afterward she reposted something on her story along the lines of “don’t like my stories unless you like the idea of us kissing”. Obviously a bit playful and not totally serious, and could be about anyone. Should I like this story too though? I want to but don’t want to play things wrong.

I've always been an indecisive person. As a kid, it was still manageable since I didn't have big responsibilities. But now that I'm entering the adult world, it's starting to become a real problem, especially because it prevents me from making crucial decisions about my goals, career, and so on.

These are important choices that need to be made as soon as possible so you can start working towards them. Not making a choice, however, only reduces your options, preventing you from living the fulfilling life you want.

Does anyone have advice on how to make decisions more confidently, especially when it comes to important life choices? I'm particularly interested in practical tips and strategies that have worked for you. How do you find clarity and commit to a path? I'd really appreciate any insights!

Backstory:Ok so I am in high school and recently before the summer Holliday I have been getting allot of female attention from girls in my school it makes me feel more confident in my appearance and even my crush said I was handsome I rejected a girl because she wasn’t my type and she

was with allot of boys in my school.

Well school ended and I go on Holliday with my family I had a decent amount of hair which was a Afro but I made it into curls so it looked better but the people in my home country don’t approve of long hair so me and my family got into a big fight and it ended with me cutting my hair now the barber messed up my hair and I don’t know what to do I lost my confidence and I don’t look good anymore my hairline got messed up and I fear the girls that once liked me will laugh at my new appearance as in previous years I was a loser in school and got no attention now I feel like I am back to that point and lost everything I worked so hard getting because of my family

I (f, 19) have always preferred boy characters rather than girl characters. However whenever I realized that I did I would start feeling immense guilt for doing so. I thought that I was ‘betraying’ feminism or smthn and would feel really bad. I would try to force myself to imagine myself more as the girl characters, pretending to be them and so. Some that I still remember to this day were liking Dipper more than Mable, Carter Kane over Sadie ( this one hurt really bad because I thought that Sadie was super fucking cool ) or Sokka over Katara. At some point I started to delude myself that it was because I just had a crush on those characters and although the guilt did lessen a bit I still felt bad for being more invested in my ‘crushes’ on boys rather than empowering the girls. Recently I realized that the crush theory was completely wrong because I am a lesbian. I have also allowed myself to just identify with the boy characters because it fits in my head but I still feel remnants of the guilt for not identifying with the girls characters. Is there any explanation as to why I’m like this or at least help with stopping feeling guilty for doing so?

I always double text whenever i feel like someone is ignoring me or when i know they are active on instagram for example. I also always text my friends first and i feel like that says a lot about me and my friendships. It makes me seem annoying or needy and i wish i wasn’t like that.

I need advice, please

How can I be different from how I am? I find myself insufferable, immature and weird, and unfortunately, being self aware doesn't save me from being those things. I'm 23, no job, no friends, severely obese, anxious as hell and even though I'm so fucking shy I'm mean and rude. I can't stand myself and if I were to interact with me as somebody else, I would dread receiving a text from me and it would take everything in me not to roll my eyes every time I speak. I'm here because I have no one to talk to about this and I got no therapist because I'm broke (when my family sent me to therapy last year it didn't work, I didn't have any improvement, I stopped going after the therapist asked me why I thought anybody would want to be my friend, I couldn't answer and that hurt my stupid pride). Any insight would be appreciated.

My partner and I went out of town this weekend and we were using the restroom (one at a time locked door type of thing) and some guy barges in as we are walking out and asks “are you the clown to his McDonald’s”.

I think I maybe autistic, sometimes jokes make zero sense that everyone else gets and my jokes people just stare at me like I’m crazy 🤨 ANYWAYS, I get the feeling it was an insult.

The entire night I got compliments on my outfit (at least 4 or 5 times) and positive energy from tons of people being new there, so I guess I am paying one drunk guy too much mind… I tend to dress up anywhere I go and the place seemed more like a crocs and flip flops joint. People who stand out attract attention, I get it, but was I right to take it that way?

Also my partner and I are hit on pretty much anytime we go out and I have an EXTREME RBF and find myself being tugged around whenever anyone makes him uncomfortable. He is a lot more animated and friendly than I tend to be with strangers. Before this comment I don’t believe I even spoke or saw this guy, so it was extremely strange.

Clown is a very strong word and it’s been bouncing around my head all day long.

Thoughts?