Let's look back at some memorable moments and interesting insights from last year.

Your top 10 posts:

• "Solitude is Addicting" by u/youareovaryacting
• "Can't decide whether i wanna sleep or stay awake" by u/Sad_Little_Sunflower
• "cycle" by u/thatonegirllina
• "Heartbreak hurts trying to sleep" by u/writepress
• "Happy Cakeday, r/SleeplessThoughts! Today you're 7" by u/AutoModerator
• "What’s the move for my meal rn" by u/Pizzaboy1113
• "Why am I a night person?" by u/Sanguine-Sanguineous
• "Word Vomit from a restless night" by u/unknownthoughtss
• "Its hard to sleep with a kill list and a trauma" by u/Ok-Jackfruit-4153
• "am i doing okay?" by u/thatonegirllina

Its hard to sleep with a trauma and a to kill list and some bitch ruining it even more

I have multiple traumas as a child my life has always been about facing rejection from other people i was always different i was on a other level but as a kid you don’t onderstand it i was the weird kid but i did nothing weird i was normal but apparently its weird to be smarter i even got rejected by the teachers now 3/8 teacher on preschool i want dead on middle school i want one to be tourmented to the end of time but later on that bc of the rejection i saught other friends older one’s im 15 and i have 4 25+ year old friends they except me bc they think the same like me they taught me the things i should have learned in preschool what is it how to know if you can trust someone all of the ppl of my age are friends with each other but im sitting alone every time im not ugly i don’t do weird shit i did nothing wrong yet i get judged by nothing yet older ppl don’t they see something in me they trust my dreams they are the reason im alive right now but back to the worst person i know that one teacher i told her everything there is to know about my trauma the suicidal thoughts i told her this in confidence she shattered it she told everything to a therapist i was forced to see after school now i cant sleep bc i repressing it harder then ever i hope that i can let it loose by typing it here peace out

This is a porion from a debate I was having the other night with a friend (the original topic was "is it still considered a good deed when the person is filming themselves doing it") Ultimately ended up with me trying to help my friend understand that the altruism of an action does not decide it's goodness. But once an action is ultimately found to be a good one, there is nothing that will change it. Without further ado, step onto my runaway train of thought with me:

​

Let's start from the top.. What compels a person to do good deeds? Gratification.

Selflessly helping others oran altruistic act usually causes the ones we've helped to feel grateful towards us. Receiving that gratitude causes us to feel strong positive emotions. This is why volunteering, being generous, and charitable actions feel good to do. It's often expressed as being thankful for a kindness or favor done to you. Acknowledgement from ones peers can also be gratifying. Usually this emotion is derived from the thought of knowing your those you know are aware of your seemingly selfless actions. This in turn motivates people to seek out gratitude, and reinforces their selfless behavior. People do good things because the appreciation and gratitude received from others feels good when they do them.

Making acts of selflessness a habit will often cause people to do them without considering the certainty of gratification or acknowledgment from others. They become mindful of the fact that being selfless feels good, simply because it's the right thing to do. The gratitude they receive is now self-fulfilling. They will subconsciously allow their behavior to be more compassionate of others. And nearly without effort, their actions more benevolent and generous. Their selfless acts of kindness are never dependent on the instant gratification of a person seeing them. They do good things because it feels good to do them.

Finally, there exists a small number of people who are intrinsically selfless by nature. Their inherently gracious personality is enjoyed by anyone around them. Every act of kindness, generosity, and benevolent charity is done because it is the right thing to do. Gratitude from others or themselves, is never expected and is only ever shown as thanks to others. All of their actions are considered with the well-being of those around them, even when they are alone. Recognition for any selfless actions are hardly an afterthought, for they would happened regardless…

They do good things because it's the right thing to do.

Considering these 3 people and the intent of their actions, where do your moments of selflessness stand? While we know it's surely impossible to be #3 at all times, we could use them as blueprint for how things we do for others should be considered. There isn't a right or wrong time to a good deed. The deed should be done because it's the right thing to do. If the gratification we get from doing them at any point becomes relevant to the intent of the act, it is no longer truly altruistic one. But most importantly, a good deed was still done and nothing can change that..

Our dilemma is, if and when we do a truly altruistic and selfless good deed. we will never know. And that's how it should be. The deed should have been done any way because it's the right thing to do.

If you look for gratification in past deeds, you will come across those special few that you did truly make selflessly. And when you do, that unadulterated pure act of goodness is now tainted. Because it's not important if the good deeds you do were selfish or self pleasing. The deed has been done, and that's the only thing matters.

We do good things because it's the right thing to do.

I'm old. And getting older makes me more tired. Tired of people's shit. Tired of waiting for people. Living is just exhausting. Seems the only time people want anything to do with you (the general "you"), is because they want something- your time, your attention, your money. They just take parts of you until you're empty.

Maybe lock down has me cynical. Maybe I'm turning into an asshole. By no means do I take any of this out on people. I just... exist. I smile and nod until it's over. Then I go home and enjoy the stillness of being alone.

When I'm alone, there's just less. Less mess, less worry, less stress, less complaining, less spending money, less walking, less talking. Just LESS! AND IT'S GREAT!

There's too much pressure to me social and likeable. I'm fine being quiet and unapproachable. My husband says I need to talk more. Everyone already talks too much. If the world was full of talkers, there would be no one listening. I like to listen; I like to learn. But I also like nothingness. Quiet. Stillness. Not every moment has to be filled.

I just want to hear the hush of night... Shhh...

If I sleep LESS, I get tired and wanna sleep MORE. And if I sleep MORE, I get tired of sleeping and then I wanna sleep MORE because I am still TIRED. WTF?????

We think of who means the most to us, to try and relax, and it hurts

Let's look back at some memorable moments and interesting insights from last year.

Your top 10 posts:

• "=(" by u/Bama-Barbie
• "You Drive Me Crazy" by u/Bama-Barbie
• "Too many words." by u/too_tall57
• "The Future" by u/EvasiveStudent
• "Rant" by u/noodlenug
• "Can't Sleep" by u/Bama-Barbie
• "Another life." by u/too_tall57
• "This Sucks" by u/Bama-Barbie
• "Thank You" by u/Bama-Barbie
• "Show You Off" by u/Bama-Barbie

Sometimes life thesedays feels like being chased by a sneaky malicious murderer, always out to get you but yo never know when it’ll attack. Everyday you hold that fear and the sad part is that murder is yourself. The part of you that’s so sick and tired of every single insatiable putrid souls in this world. The part of you that want to save you from this veil hole we called earth by ending your own life. It is just a thought of courseee a feeling. Which is too heavy to tell the ones you love and too dangerous to be displayed according to the mental health diagnosis manual. Even when I’m writing it all down I see it as a threat to others well-being, I see some fuckers thinking it’s an attention seeking tactic, I see some duckers thinking I’m simply comming down on drugs ,, and worse, some would take this as a sweet ass invite to take advantage of my vulnerability,m. I am sick and tired of all youse and your fucked up human conditions, and the past two years only proved that this world is nothing but a shit mixed blood orgy. And to be honest I’d be glad to erase my soul out of this cunt hole if I could, just to save my own already damnned soul. But that’s not how this works, I’m here, fuck, what do I do?!

Assume

Bringing home a new baby brings with it an exhausting array of new responsibilities and challenges. Is there such a thing as a typical day and night for new parents? Probably not!

Remember, the baby has just gone through an enormous change too, so part of the process when you first bring him home is his transition from the womb to the outside world. Keep the baby close to you, keep him wrapped and warm. If you’re breastfeeding, this will take some time for both of you to adjust to as well.

If you’re new baby is formula fed, he’ll need to feed every 3 to 5 hours. If you’re breastfeeding, he’ll need to feed more frequently. Sometimes you will feel that all you do all day and night is breastfeed. You will probably feel much more empathy with cows! And there will be a lot of diapers to change, especially until you get familiar with his schedule. His diaper will probably need to be changed shortly after feeding, about once an hour in the very beginning. Be sure to check frequently.

Until the umbilical cord has fallen off, you’ll want to keep to sponge baths every few days, but you will want to wash the baby’s bottom every day. You can wipe the baby’s hands, face, neck and bottom every day with a soft washcloth with warm water. When the baby’s ready for full baths, in a few weeks, every day is a good idea to prevent diaper rashes. But keep in mind that too much bathing can dry out his sensitive skin. So see what works for your baby.

Those little finger and toenails will grow quickly, and they’ll need to be trimmed regularly so the baby doesn’t scratch himself. The baby’s nails can be long, even at birth and attached high on the nail bed. You’ll need to gently press the fingerpad away from the nail and clip it with a baby nail clipper. You might want to do this when the baby’s sleeping to ensure that he doesn’t jerk those little fingers and toes away!

Get used to being busy 24/7 during the first month, at least. You will be feeding and changing diapers around the clock so get as much help as you can so you can have some peace too.

Of course I can’t get in touch with you now. I can’t keep my mind off of you since I’ve been back and I thought after coming to see you that we would talk more than usual. Silly me I guess. I just don’t get it. I’m just as pretty if not prettier than the girls you introduced me to but I can’t seem to hold your attention. I call and you don’t answer. I text and you don’t answer. I thought for sure with college football coming up we would talk more because I was going to give you shit about the Gamecocks. Is it because I said I can’t wait to come see you again? I’ve been going back and forth since I got home of why I didn’t try to kiss you when I had the chance. But I was scared of being rejected if I’m being honest. I can’t get the picture of you with your shirt off and talking on the phone out of my head. I don’t think I’ve ever wanted a guy this badly in my life. I’m so frustrated right now and I hope you call me back soon. I miss you bunches turkey.

I wish I wasn’t back home. I wish I was still there. I didn’t realize how beautiful that place is. Words can’t even express how wonderful those two days were. So wonderful that I’m utterly sad that I’m gone. Thank you for showing me around and spending time with me. Every minute from start to finish was nothing short of fantastic. It went by so incredibly fast and there were so many times when I was there that I wished time would stop or at least slow down. I keep replaying everything we did but I have to say the best moment for me was being on the water while watching you and your brothers on the boat. Sweet baby Jesus y’all are hilarious! And you... you are something special hon. You don’t even know how many times I just wanted to kiss you or rip your clothes off. You think you know someone or what they’re like and then you meet them and it’s totally different. And you Mr are totally different in such a good way in person. As much as I love your voice phone and text does not do you justice. Speaking of voice hearing it in person. Cat purr is all I got. Hell you’re the complete package but I don’t need to tell you that. I can personally say I see why you are desirable. I don’t like how many females you know and how many I was introduced to. But I have to keep in mind you’re not mine and you don’t belong to anyone. And that’s what I was afraid of by coming down there because now good God do I want you more than ever. I probably won’t be able to sleep for the next few days but I’m glad I got to see you. And see not all of us are all talk 🤪. Hope you finally get some sleep. Goodnight turkey <3

I can’t believe that I’m going to see you this weekend! I don’t know what to pack so I want to bring everything. I have so much to do before I drive there but I can’t wait. I have to get my hair and nails did tomorrow and I’m praying you like them. I have these butterflies in my stomach and I’m so nervous. I know you say you’re not looking for anything but I’m hoping the two days I’m there will change your mind. You didn’t seem nervous at all about me coming this Labor Day weekend when we were on the phone tonight which makes me wonder. I’m just all in my head right now but I’m going to breathe and try to calm myself because I know this weekend will be fantastic. Be safe on your run and I will be seeing you very soon hon. These next couple days can’t go by fast enough. Sweet dreams and goodnight turkey <3

Where are you Mr? You’re not returning any of my messages and I don’t know when you’re supposed to be back. I know I probably worry about you more than I should but I can’t help it. I can’t help the way I feel about you because you have done something to me. Please come back soon or at least text me and let me know you’re okay or that your mom is. I miss you bunches hon and I’m not afraid to say that to you. Hope you’re sleeping better than I’ve been these past few nights. Wish I could hold you and hug you but I can’t. I can feel another sleepless night coming on yay me! Goodnight turkey <3

I don’t know when you’re coming back but I miss you in such a bad way. I can’t stop thinking about our last conversation and I wish you would come back already. I hope you’re okay and I’m still praying for your family. I don’t know what’s going on with me but you have me feeling things I haven’t felt in a long time and right now I would do just about anything to hear your voice. It’s been an awful weekend and you always seem to know how to brighten up a gals day. I’m counting down the minutes until we can talk again hon but until then please take care of yourself. Goodnight turkey wherever you are <3

I know the more I get to talk to you the more I start to fall harder for you. I know this because it gets harder and harder to get off the phone with you hon. If it’s like this in person than I’m in trouble. I’m so glad I met you and I hope this story has a happy ending. Please travel safely and I hope your flight tomorrow goes smoothly. Hope to talk with you soon and see you even sooner! I miss you already. Goodnight turkey <3

That conversation tonight was just wow. You made me laugh and almost cry. You bring out so many emotions it isn’t even funny. How do you do it Mr? I can’t stop smiling and we have been off the phone for like a hour now. I can’t wait to see you soon. Sweet Jesus I can’t wait to touch and hold you. I hope you finally sleep hon. Goodnight turkey <3

Thank you for answering my call and putting a smile on my face. It’s been a while since we’ve talked and your voice and company still has the same effect on me hon. I’m sorry again for what you’re going through and I’m praying for you and her and your family. I’m glad you’re willing to entertain the idea of me coming there to see you and I completely understand it’s not a good time right now. I just want you to know I’m here for you and you’re worth waiting for. Thank you for the conversation tonight and thank you for making a gal feel special. I was relieved to hear that you weren’t back with your ex and I’m sorry for my reoccurring nightmares and you having to reassure me. You really are one of the good ones Mr.! Until we talk again I wish you goodnight turkey. <3

So I’ve called you several times and texted a bunch and haven’t heard back from you. I wish you would answer me because I wonder if you’re okay. I miss hearing your voice and I miss the excitement when you answer or text back. I know you’re going through a lot and I just hope you’re okay. I wish this feeling in my gut would go away. I keep having this nightmare that you’re back with your ex but I know that she won’t contact you. I wish you would just like me back already hon. I’ve been debating on just coming to Charleston but I don’t know how you would receive that. Anyways wherever you are I hope you’re safe and I hope I hear from you soon. Goodnight turkey <3

You asked well here it is. The truth is you give me butterflies every time we talk. You make me feel like I’m a teenager again and I haven’t felt that in a long time. I don’t know how you do it but it’s just something about you that’s different. I talk to other guys during the day but it’s not the same when I talk to you. I don’t know I just like all of it. I just like you what can I say. I wish you would go to sleep. Your voice sounds hoarse and you sound tired. I could be wrong but you sounded high as a kite also. I worry about you turkey. I feel like it’s starting to catch up to you and it’s not good. I wish you wouldn’t run yourself into the ground hon.

I’m so glad you answered my FaceTime call this afternoon because I’ve been worried about you so much. I felt so pretty today in my dress and I wanted you to see me. I have to say that you clean up very well Mr. and I did not expect you to be so dressed up. Honestly I was hoping for you to be shirtless again but you look just as good with clothes on my God. Did I really watch you get into a helicopter while we were FaceTiming?! Who are you turkey and what do you really do? You apparently have money and I can help you spend it if you want. Just kidding! You make me crazy hon because just as I was trying to write you off you seem to find a way to come right back in and dominate my brain. I know you’re going through a rough time but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t glad that these circumstances made you push out traveling for a bit. Maybe now I can come see you. Or you could take that helicopter and come to Alabama. Do you have this effect on every gal or just me? I’m just going to lay here and hopefully fall asleep while I think about how exciting your life must be and how I would love to be in it. What can I say turkey other then I think I’m addicted <3

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Up until now I’ve always had a certain type of guy I would date. I thought I always knew what I wanted in a man. That was until I met you. Turns out you are what I’ve always wanted. Someone exactly like you. You said in your post that you don’t feel like you’re good enough. But you are turkey you really are. I actually think you’re over qualified! Truth is I get hit on a lot and you’re not the only one who gets attention. And you may not notice me or anyone else but I notice you. You’re this stubborn bad boy that won’t listen to anyone. You do what you want and I get that. But you’re also someone who is deep because I can tell when you write. There is so much more to you then you let anyone see. One day when and if you choose someone I hope they realize how lucky they are to have you. I hope they never let you go because they would be an absolute idiot if they do. They may not see it but you’re one of a kind. I miss hearing your voice and I’m sorry you’re going through all of this hon I really am. When you’re ready to let someone in again I’ll be around and who knows I may tell you about my not so secret diary on Reddit. Still praying for you but for now I guess it’s oh well. Goodnight turkey <3

Just wondering around looking for good conversation or ideas to ponder.

Sometimes becoming secluded to improve yourself leaves others behind, who knew it be hard to find friends when they can’t follow good nonsmall talk bs.

I’m so sorry to hear about your mother hon. I had to read your text three times just to make sure I was seeing it right. I wish I could be there to hold you right now. I wish I was there to take care of you right now. I wish you would let me or anyone in right now. Even though I can’t be with you I will put my feelings aside and say I hope there is someone there for you at a moment like this. I can’t imagine that there isn’t someone next to you right now being the guy you are. I don’t know when I’ll talk to you again or how long it will be and this whole situation makes me sad. But please know that I’m praying for y’all during these troubling times. Sending lots of Bama love your way turkey <3

That was a short phone call but one of our best so far. You are an absolute riot when you’re in a good mood turkey. I wish you would take some medicine for your ADHD but it was such a fun call tonight. You’re like a sudden burst of energy that I wish I had with me all the time. I wish I could just put you in my purse and take you with me everywhere I go. I know you say you’re not trying to be with anyone but I wish you were mine because I would show you off to everyone. You give me so little yet I know there is so much more to you. You drive me nuts Mr! It’s going to suck when you go but it must be nice to just leave the country for two or three months and travel just because you want to. But I’m sure that’s one of the perks when you work as much as you do. Which what is it again that you do exactly? So many questions but very few answers. I’m glad you picked up tonight and I hope you’re safe on your run not that you need it hon. Still can’t get you and your abs out of my mind after that FaceTime call. Gives me chills every time I think about it <3

So my post got removed from another sub but I have to get this out there so my conscience is clear. I did something today totally out of character and I don’t really feel that bad about it. I’ve been trying to get the attention of a guy that I like a whole lot and he’s just not been receptive to it. I haven’t spoken to him for a couple of days so today when he answered I lied. I told him I had an event I had to go to in his city and I asked if he would want to get together for some drinks. He agreed and I am unbelievably happy. Truth is there is no event and that I’m solely going there with the intention of seeing him. I confessed this to my sisters and they said don’t feel too bad about it because sometimes you just have to go for it. Hopefully this turns out well because I can’t wait to see him.

And just like that when I was riding a high because of the FaceTime call with you earlier you make me feel so unimportant to you. I wanted to tell you how I can’t stop thinking about you after seeing you and that I hope you can give me a chance but you are just oblivious. You try to do so many things at once because of your ADHD and it is so damn frustrating. I don’t care that you’re playing PlayStation with some girl right now who by the way sounds trashy. But you acted like I was bothering you. Then when I ask why did you answer the call then if you’re so busy you decided to say because it seemed like the right thing to do. Yes I do think you are a highly attractive guy who has a silver tongue. Yes you have a lot to offer a gal but apparently you don’t want me or any of us. So I’m going to slow down calling you hon because all my feelings for you are just going to waste. I feel for all the other girls I’m competing with because if they haven’t figured it out yet yes he is single but news flash he plans on staying that way for God knows how long. </3