I see the whole tradwife trend in the Christian community and notice a lot of similarities in the Muslim community except I feel like it has never become normal for Muslim wives to work.

I personally choose to work. I am a mum of one. I don’t know how women can put their whole trust in a husband? With the amount of dusty Muslim husbands I see, I just wouldn’t be able to do it unless I had been married for a very long time and could fully trust him

I also noticed something which shouldn’t be the case, but men sometimes treat us better when they know we can leave. I don’t have any family so the only way I could do that is if I work.

I’m not judging women either way, I’m just curious on Muslim women’s thoughts about this.

The Muslim community seems to shame me for working. I think they shame husbands even more tbh. Btw my job is literally all women. I rarely interact with men at all so i feel the free mixing thing is just a cop out because there are plenty of jobs where you don’t have to interact with the opposite much at all.

Also people act like if you work, your house will be a mess and you won’t cook. Um not really. When you get used to a rouitine it’s not that hard to do all the house chores and work.

assalamu alaykum sisters, I need some advice on how to dress modestly while having a sense a style since a few people have told me I look like a granny 😭 I either wear abayas or long skirts (pic above). Trousers although baggy are off the table since I want to avoid showing the shape of my legs. Please help me out!!

salam aleikum, im a recent revert and i am no where near fluent in Arabic. on tiktok, i get these quran recitation videos that are maybe 1 minute long. i know that when listening to quran you need to be attentive and focus on the recitation but i was wondering if i can do that without understanding what is being said?

many thanks!

Possible TW: mentions of body image issues and ED-related habits

I like to think I’m not a superficial person at all however when it comes to me I’m never ever satisfied with how I look. To the point where I will associate my appearance to my self worth and how others value me.

I thought I’d stop caring about it so much after I lost weight. But now my attention has shifted to other things that are beyond my control like my bone structure or face shape or height.

I’m so annoyed with it because I truly don’t care about these things. I don’t even know what the end goal of these concerns are. I don’t care about being the most beautiful or most attractive I just want to look my best self. So why do I worry about things that are beyond my control?

It’s led me to slip into old habits like under eating and “fasting” for a day or two or not leaving the house if I don’t like how I look that day.

I don’t know what to do because I objectively know I look fine. I get moments of clarity where I actually appreciate my appearance. And anyway the features I have are gifted by Allah so beyond weight loss how can I think to change them?

When Omar Suleiman said "Romance is like rizq, it is not something everyone is going to have in this life." If it isn't written for you, it will be difficult to look around and see others being blessed with it. But like every other form of rizq, it's a test and you'll get more than you can imagine in Jannah which will be your final home- forever. Saw this post while scrolling on pinterest and have been thinking about it since then.

Asalamualaykum sisters ❤️ I've been having trouble crying to Allah lately. At a point in my life I used to cry sooo much in prayer a. Now I feel like my heart has hardened. Even when I do sin, I'll feel some shame but not as much as I used to. Maybe I'm not connecting with Quran as much as I should, or...? Idk. Any advice how to purify my heart again? JazakAllah Khayran🌸

Basically this all started because when i got my period i did istinja and water dripped down from my legs and i assume it might've touched the blood. this wasn't on my mind at first. so i put my trousers on and then by them touching my waist i thought that would now be impure then when i touch my trousers my hand is impure and then the umpire water dripped on my feet so everywhere i walked is most likely impure and i am going crazy i am so upset and mad because literally everything is turning impure from my stupid legs because i even showered my bottom half and the water that comes into contact with my area will make impure water drip down onto my legs again so i keep holding my trousers with tissues but even then if my body gets wet the impurity will spread to my bed and everywhere i go please help im literally trapped i cannot handle this anymore now my floor is impure everything that touches my leg is too and even when i lay in bed and my airpods or something touch my legs they will be impure so even when my period finish's the whole house will have some sort of impurity im so scared and it's 3:42 AM right now and i have just been crying because using the bathroom is too much hardship how is this not happening to anyone else i dont understand how its just me who deals with this on their periods and it isn't waswasa i know for sure the water has to be impure but i can't even escape this because even showering won't help this post is a mess but i can't take this anymore i need help pls

Salamm Sisters I hope you are all doing well.

Like the title says I have experienced a lot of hair loss due to hijab on the hairline. I have made the mistakes of tight buns for 8+ hours a day with not many great materials back then or caring about it much until I realized how bad it looks now after 2 years. I compared some photos from past years and was devastated to see how much my hair has thinned since then. So I am basically asking if there is anything that helped you gain back the hair?

I know that good hijab materials plus undercaps etc play a big role however they wont “ reverse” the lost hair. I got minoxidil prescribed from my doc but it didn’t help much till now. I am mainly talking about a type a medical product. I have tried rosemary and all that as well but no major success. Any suggestions are still appreciated. Thank you

Salaam Sisters, I’m a Muslim and currently on a journey learning about Islam. Now im a bit slow when it comes to learning and understanding things, my question is what do scholars mean when they say ‘yes it is permissible to dye any hair colour other than black’ this part I do understand.

But what do they mean when they say ‘so long as that is not imitating non-Muslim women, such as if non-Muslim women or some non-Muslim women have a special way of dyeing or cutting their hair, and that is exclusive to them; it is not permissible to imitate them in that case’. What’s confusing me is what do they mean by not imitating non Muslims? What specific hair dyes or cutting hair that is exclusive to them do they mean by this? I’m sorry about the silly question I just need help understanding. JZK

America is full regarding the next president, I hear so much about Trump being bad

I'm in au so won't be voting, just watching

We hear all about Kamala is going to save America and by extension the rest of the free world

Yet Sahih al Bukhari 7099

Never shall a nation succeed that makes a woman their ruler

How do we as Muslim women reconcile this? Simply not vote if we are in the states and whine about Trump

Or vote Kamala and?

Hi everyone,

I might be interning during the summer (inshallah) and I have been applying to some companies that might require a business professional dress code. I have no idea where to look and what are potential silhouettes that can work for me.

I live in the US, budget of $200, and am mid size. I wear size 16 US pants / L or 14 shirts / XL dresses and my height is 5’2. If it does matter, I have a “romantic” body type.

I feel like it’s so hard to find something cute online as inspiration since everything is so 2010s or either on skinny people, which obviously won’t work for me and my body type. I just want to look professional and modest in the same time. I could potentially thrift some blazers but not really sure of pants / tops / dresses.

Thanks for your help!

Growing up I wasnt close to my sis & mom & quite frankly they weren’t the type to be close to

Everything was haram & my elder sis was a goody two shoes & me painted a devil in comparison by my mum

We couldnt bond over anything normal sisters would like makeup or i couldnt ask her questions younger sis’s do as they get older like abt periods & hair removal (we’re asian lol)

Even if i told my sis I wanted to remove facial hair as I was getting bullied in school she was so culturally constrained her reaction would be to snitch on me

Growing up we’re fine now but thats only after she got married

Like she wanted to bond over makeup & hair removal tips & all these things that I wanted to ask when I was younger but she & my mum shamed me

So now when we do it feels unnatural

When she talks about any of these things I feel uncomfortable & forced

Dont get me wrong we’re at a good place but it kinda pxsses me off that now she wants to bond over these things but before it was strictly haram right ?

I remember pulling her up about this years ago & she told me to stop ruining things & being a weirdo who brings up old stuff

But it really does irk me

My older sis is really cultural in a weird way for someone who grew up in the west like me

Like not ‘tied to your roots kinda thing’ as in she would reject anything western and everything from ‘back home’ as if its more glorified to do that

So she even got married from back home (which I despised for many reasons including that she set precedent for me that my parents expected me to accept some stranger from back home)

She started to bond with her back home sis-in-laws doing everything that was haram for me

She would get her makeup done & hair removal etc (in the most FOB way that pssed me off further)

Aside from these things I also generally feel uncomfortable with my mom & sis discussing things like marriage & babies & pregnancy etc

In my head i still feel shamed for discussing womanly topics feels unnatural with them

So much so I feel like I grew up quite masculine as some kind of rebellion to this weird environment i grew up in

My sis is so soft spoken ideal ethnic daughter whilst i was the ‘troubled’ westernised one with a loud booking voice

In those moments I wish I was sat with another pair of mom & sister who never shamed me growing up in related to female issues

You know those mother daughter-sister duos/families where all the females are really close & share everything together

I just want to have my own family, where females dont grow up in that kind of constricted environment

I’m a revert so this might be a known trick that I just came around to but WIG HEAD BANDS. Especially if you are a fine, slippery haired girly run to Amazon or wherever else sells them. I haven’t been able to wear under caps due to them sliding right off my head no matter what I do… and now I can wear them, totally opening up the range of styles and fabrics I can use for my hijab.

Was very excited and had to share. Love the subreddit, may Allah bless you all ❤️

So I opened a substack which is a newsletter site and app, including a blog and a social media presence and i talked about women in general because it is a topic im passionate about and I talked about islam.

If you like reading, I would like your pov on it : https://open.substack.com/pub/notesofathinkerr/p/womans-world?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=4mgi82

Salam,

My period isn’t for another week but I had some spotting the other day. I did wudhu before each prayer and continued as normal. But today I noticed a lot more blood so I thought I was on my menses, but I checked later and it’s too light to be the case.

I’m not sure if I’m on my period or if I just have heavy spotting? I don’t usually spot but I sometimes have irregular periods. Should I have done the prayers today? Will Allah forgive me since I missed them? I don’t want to miss prayers if I didn’t have to, but I really don’t know :(

Salaams sister it's me again I'm back for more advice please may you assist me cause the struggle is real real right now , I'm asking where do our petite sister 5'4 and below with 32 leg length get thier jeans and trousers from please cause I'm struggling to find good few pairs of jeans for me to wear as I have cleared out my whole wardrobe and now is left only the things that fit me.

please remember I'm based in the UK so only shops I can get shipping or physically shop in there shops please.

Thank very much for your assistance very much appreciated .

Salam alaikum sisters

Soon I have a trip to travel somewhere, 10 or more hours maybe 12+. I should wear something comfortable, cause I will sit a lot and it will be tiring. Any advice?

Hi assalamualaikum,

My mood went from high because of long weekend, to very depressingly low because I just realised I lost my 22K gold ring gifted by my mother.

I lost a bit of weight this past weeks because of stress. Never have I ever thought that my finger would be the first to shrink because of my weight loss. The past weeks have been so stressful and things were hectic.

I am usually very meticulous and perfectionist. I have the tendency to check all my belongings everywhere I went. Yes, EVERYWHERE. But somehow in those weeks my brain didn't do the routine. Because I didn't even realise when I lost my ring.

Last time I check it was on this Monday. And I realized I lost it yesterday. And my mood soured 😫 I did everything I could, asking around, contacting authorities, blasting public announcements... none worked. I guess the last step is tawakkal.

If you have tips and tricks or doa, share with me! I'm desperate.

Asalam alykum

I want to know which type of hijab will be good as in summers,winters

There are different types but i generally get confused

Hope will get help

Jazak Allah khairyan

salaam everyone im looking for some advice as ive been struggling lately

i currently live in a predominantly white state. I moved here for grad school/work but i graduated in may alhamdulillah and now im just continuing to work while i look for a job that will take me back home. Ive really been struggling though because Im the only woc/hijabi at work and it feels very lonely and exhausting to feel different all the time. Ive been actively applying for jobs and I even started praying tahajjud and reading quran daily. Ive been doing this consistently alhamdulillah for a couple months now.

This week, I got rejected from two jobs that I thought I would for sure get. And now I just feel very frustrated because I felt like Ive been on my deen, not just for this purpose but also because I want to improve myself generally speaking. Im just having trouble being patient and trusting in Allah’s plan. I know that Allah knows what is best for me and things will happen when they are meant to happen but idk I still feel frustrated. Are there any duaas or any advice you all can give me that will help me be patient and reaffirm my trust in Allah and His plan?

Seriously, every single Bridal Hijab Stylist on IG is based in the UK, nothing in the USA. Any recommendations please? I want someone to style my scarf on my big day like they do in the UK. Please advise me!

UK afford Abayas - please can you recommend online shops

Budget: £20-40 per abaya

Faceless wall art - opinions on it.

What do you ladies do during your periods instead of salah? How can I continue ibadah cos I’ll be honest I don’t do anything much during my period and lately it’s been making me feel so empty & like a kufr

Salam sisters, I’m not sure if this post is allowed, if not I’ll delete it. Sorry in advance for posting something a bit negative.

I’m a convert who’s struggled with mental health issues, specifically depression, since I was six. It’s a chemical imbalance, probably genetic. I currently have a diagnosis of depressive-manic disorder and I go through constant phases of highs and lows. The lows are honestly devastating.

I often feel ungrateful feeling this way given how much Allah has given me in my life, there’s always this feeling of hopelessness that follows me that sometimes makes me suicidal. I however am not planning on anything because I value the life that was given to me.

I hear a lot about how Islam (or at least an Islamic view of life) often helps with depression, but when I crash, even tho I don’t lose hope in Allah, it hurts my faith significantly and I become bitter and sceptical. It’s like a switch in my brain.

Mostly posting this because I’m feeling very alone and would like to know if someone else has felt or struggled with the same thing?

Salaam sisters,

Can someone please help me, I'm kinda freaking out a little.

So my periods were regular to the date. I knew when I was due to start. I track using an app. I missed May period (it was quite a stressful month), and then I thought it went back to normal in June. However, I missed July and August but bled throughout September, which freaked me out. I had gone to the doctors, and they did blood test to check hormones and thyroids and scan of my womb, and alhamdulilah results came back all fine. However this month, my period is now on its 10th day and heavy. My friend mentioned premenopause, which has freaked me out even more as I'm only 40. I do have another appointment later this month for another check-up. I wanted to know if there are Dr here who could potentially shed some light.

Jazakallah.

Salaam everyone!

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Salam sisters! I am new to Islam and will be taking Shahada really soon! I was wondering if anyone has any book recommendations that relate to Islam or Muslim Women that are available on kindle unlimited? Thank you so much! 😊

Salam. Before I start, I don’t intend to backbite anyone here. So basically today I was out at the masjid with my sister, and younger brother also my cousin, and usually when i go to the masjid, my sisters friend and her siblings also come, there’s this young girl of her friend that i love, she’s younger than me and I often hang around with her after school while she waits for her brother. She has a friend her age I also hang around with at the masjid and after school. I was waiting around with her friend for her and her siblings to come while we listen to the lesson outside of the masjid rooms. (From the speakers) and one of my classmate and my friends sister’s sister comes to her and tells her they need to talk with her, so i sit and wait for her, and the girl comes back and tells me that the girls said I went around and kissed the hands of people in my grade, they said not to hang out with me and they saw it because they’re in my grade. I don’t know what to do. Should I confront my classmate on monday? Should I tell on them?