Not about loyalty, even after hearing the harshest words today, I will still love the guy with all my heart. I’m sad for me. Heart didn’t change. Even when he left exactly because of this heart which loves him. I would stay away for a bit but keep the love and hope alive. I know all about self respect. But I have chosen to be this way - generous, giving and loving. My light can’t be marred by other people’s actions.

I just noticed my ex who he broke up with me 8 years ago likes one of my Facebook stories. After 8 years, all this time no contact, nothing. Now this, it's just left me wondering why I guess, he broke it off to marry someone else. It's not nice to play with my emotions, he knows by liking it, it will appear in my notifications. I feel i am over him now but i'm just left wondering.....

We went six months no contact and then we randomly texted each other and this happened. It was just as amazing as usual. We still love each other but we know we can’t be together cause we’re not fit for a relationship right now. I don’t know if we’re ever gonna have another chance. And yeah, that’s it. That’s how it’s supposed to be, but it’s quite heartbreaking for me. Life’s a bitch sometimes.

Me (28F) and my ex (33M) dated for almost two years. It was a difficult relationship due to our mental problems. We both have our paranoias, which sometimes overlap.

At the very beginning, I told him that I was a person who had problems with rejection, with the need for a short break, because I had my own problems and lack of trust in people. He knew it and understood it.

We saw each other, went to meetings, had a lot of common interests and topics, and talked for several hours by phone and text.

However, when I started opening up, wanting to take him out to a restaurant, to the cinema, to invite him to my place - he was often refused and we ended up going to less populated places. He talked to me about these concerns, so I understood.

When I had a problem, he always listened. It was similar on my part, but during the worst period he didn't talk about his emotions, even though he knew he could count on me.

But when I wanted to make a gesture from him, to extend my hand, he took it away and I felt rejected. That's what I was most afraid of. It hurt me a lot and I started to create a wall around myself and block myself from it. That's how our relationship evaporated.

We talked from time to time. We had been working together for some time, which was contributing to the problem and feeling stifled.

Even though I wanted to talk about what hurts me several times, I didn't dare to do it. I know it was the same on his part.

However, I have known for some time that he is doing better, which makes me very happy because he is finally taking small steps to improve his situation. He talks to friends, goes out with them.

I feel regret and a sense of injustice that when I tried and encouraged him to do all this, it was to no avail, and yet his friends immediately pulled him out.

This is something I haven't worked through. We talk more often because we both feel good in each other's company, but I'm sorry that his friends have never met me and I've never met them, I didn't manage to go to the concert with him, and he goes straight with them.

I feel like this is why I'm having trouble moving on and I'm wondering if I should talk to him about what's been on my mind.

I support him as much as possible to make him do better. I would like to maintain friendly contact because I realize that our relationship would not be good.

Should such a conversation take place? To close this stage with an explanation?

More than a year has passed. I am not interested in an F/M relationship, but I would like to maintain contact with friends because I am happy with his progress and I miss our talks about cinema and books, and architecture.

I also have the impression that there are a few things he would like to say on his part.

Recently I spoke to my ex - whom I am working with and have daily contact.

He saw immediately my breakdown and interested what's happening. He said I can always count on him and speak to him if I need to.

We were in 2 year relationship which flattered with time, because of our problems (paranoias, depression). I wrote earlier that he's been better. Enough to get out with his best friends, especially with one friend who is married.

During the talk - when I told him about my feelings and regrets and communicated why it ended and how I was hurt - I learned from him that he and his married friend have mutual feelings to each other past 10 years. They know they're doing wrong and they should not but cannot stop it. Seeing every time they have, even with her husband.

She told him to find someone to have to speak about it. And he told me about this, during our talk.

I don't know why he did it, especially with all dilemma he have. He said she helps him to get out of depression but I see otherwise, due to their relationship and fact that she told him that she know she will have to set him free because she and her husband will try for a baby.

I have a feeling that is gonna end very badly. And I'm worried about my ex that all the work he has done until now will take him back to his bad phases.

Therefore, I have a problem as we have contact, yet he have problem to speak to me about her (which seems to be funny as he only told me about his situation) and I can't tell what he wants from me. He cares about me and support with therapy, saying he's proud of me and I can always count on him and speak to him if I have to and yet he has problem to do the same though I see clearly that's something's bad.

I spoke to my therapist - as I started recently - who said that I shouldn't engage emotionally that much and that is weird that I'm invested in this and truly worry about his situation. She asked me if I want something romantically from him but I'm most sure about the fact that I know his worse time and don't want to see him in this stage again. I wish him all best.

I know that is the stage I have to work on and I'm going to. It's just accepting all those emotions, which can get me overhelmed at this moment.

To the days that never came,

To the love that never was given,

To the future that never was,

And into your shadow, where I will remain.

• Me

2 year relationship thought to be going well ended up in misery. I put or thought to be putting my heart n souls into this woman but lwk was hurting her. maybe if she communicated i could’ve changed but no she just never spoke up. i can take blame into consideration on why we are broken up, me understanding that i was a very unaware person of my actions played a huge role and i can’t bare going a day without blaming myself for it. i don’t know what ti do or what to say i just need guidance plz help

they have my playlist i made for them, i think. they left me because of their mental health and i hope they feel better. it hurts me that they aren’t in my life anymore but,,, they still linger in my mind.

i also wanted to add two days after they left they got with someone who actively bullied and harassed me,, so,, yea,, i found out because the person who did that texted it to me so my life is great!! i miss them so much it hurts me, it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts. they still have my playlist added i think,, but i could be wrong :((

I just wanted to get on here and type some of my feelings out. Me and my ex girlfriend had a pretty toxic relationship at times and I fully understand there are always two sides to everything and I’m not going act like I was the perfect boyfriend. I still miss her so much after we officially broke up about 6 weeks ago and we still talk to each other everyday at least once a day. I’m graduating with my Masters tomorrow and she’s not going to be there. I have zero motivation or sense of accomplishment for myself which I know is unreasonable, but it’s how I feel. I always envisioned us celebrating this together and I’m so upset that she’s not going to be in attendance. I know I should probably cut this off, but it’s so difficult when she is still reaching out to me at times. I definitely feel like I am not wanted by her, however, she doesn’t want to lose me or my support that I have always given her. I guess I’m just lost and need some support or advice on what to do from here and greatly appreciate anyone who takes the time to comment. 🙏🏼

Where to even begin here. Just a little context, I'm not a very masculine guy. In fact I'm kind of a femboy, I like to feel like a submissive princess. Like on r/RoleReversal basically. Well, my then-gf basically tried to be the dominant partner, even though she isn't that type, and she just didn't want to hurt my feelings. She's also not attracted to feminine guys, doesn't find thighs attractive etc. It was so hard to learn that this was all one-sided, she blames herself for leading me on but I reassured her that we're just really inexperienced. It was never going to work out, we were just two subs trying to see a dominant partner in each other and it hurts to look back at all of our magical moments through this new lens. Our breakup was healthy and nobody was mad or disliked another, but damn does it still hurt. She would drive me places, including on top of a mountain to see the solar eclipse. She was so good to me and so patient, and I learned a lot from her (this was my first in-person relationship). I'm feeling so many things right now though, and most of it is sadness.

I just cried my heart out and imagined I was cuddling my sweetheart who had cut all contact with me. Funnily enough I did this to maybe by the ink spots. It’s a rather sad song, especially hearing it while all this is happening. Sweetums, I miss everything. I know I’m probably not the one for you but I hope everything is ok right now.

I’m up late wishing he could have just showed up for me like I needed, communicated, reciprocated effort, been there for me through the hard stuff the unpleasant stuff the inconvenient stuff, been able to take initiative in his life and our relationship. Wishing we were next to each other rn, that he was able to grow and treat me better and figure out what he really wanted, and that everything worked out. This is a full on fantasy. I hate wanting the version of someone that only exists in your head. He was the most beautiful man I’ve ever met. I still love him months later and even though I know I made the right decision by leaving this sucks. I did my best and tried to work on us for over a year, who knows why he couldn’t show up for me. Who knows how complex or simple the reasons might be. He could never really tell me no matter how many times I asked. I can’t wrap my brain around loving someone but having it go so wrong. I hate this reality im living, but I know the reality where I stayed with him would have destroyed me, maybe even both of us. I want a third reality, one where he took accountability and made changes and put the same level of effort in that I did.

Today marks a week since I found out that he has failed me again. For the fourth time. You would think... Four times? Yes.

I'm really devastated. It was a healthy relationship, of communication, of love. We have never argued, nor have we fought. We have finished since he has a problem (of very big insecurity), The problem was not me, on the contrary, I gave him all the security and confidence so that he could continue growing his life and it made me happy.

But really he is very painful and hurt from something that does not correspond to me, but from his past. And he has never given me a chance to help him...

Sometimes we have to bang our heads against the wall and hurt ourselves to realize that there are certain limits that surpass us. Those limits are self-love and mental health. Love is not everything. Love is another thing. We are not responsible for caring for and healing people's wounds :/ but rather accompanying them in the healing process and supporting them. Don't forget this.

I told my girl I don’t want her to cry in front of me (distance FT) cause I think it’s manipulation. And she really got angry about it. She always brings something that’s makes me feel weak and I ain’t even flinch or feel emotional about it. That really makes her more emotional and tell me I am not her comfort place.

Help me get an idea as to how my ex-girlfriend did it. It’s the one thing I still can’t fathom. My reaction to the thought of it has changed, and my mindset has massively improved, but I still can’t wrap my head around how someone could be reduced to shambles over a breakup, and then be head-over-heels with a stranger two weeks later. Not even a second thought about it, either, as it’s been 2 months and they’re still together.

I am seeing some guy and we had a lot of ups and downs because of his jealousy. He was a accusing me that I am seeing someone, then I accused him that he is seeing someone. Now I am leaving the town and this was his “goodbye” message. I don't know how to formulate it. I am in love with this guy. Please let me know what do you think. Does he have feeling for me or what? “I had intended to share 40 thoughts with you, but I've decided to keep them to myself and laugh it off. It just seems better that way. I wanted to ensure you don't feel used or like your time is being wasted. Regarding our previous disagreement about you accusing me that I am seeing someone and everything else what is not true. you choose to leave, I understood and hold the door open for you. I still think highly of you. You're a amazing woman, very bright, kind, cultured, and smart. I am not sure when we will see each other again, or if you will even want to. I wish only good things for you. “

I’m so incredibly lonely right now, I really need a friend, someone who’s actually going to be here and bring some type of positivity in my life and who’s not going to walk away from me randomly, I’m going through a really tough time and just really need someone who’s supportive

you have already left, but the memories of you stayed.

I remember how excited we both were to finally have a double bed to share together after spending so long in a single bed.

And I remember how amazing it felt to finish a long day of studying to go to bed and always have her search for me with her hands whilst she was still asleep - I thought that was the most loving and cute thing in the world.

Even my bed and house reminds me of her, I feel like I can’t escape how much I miss her.

Sometimes it makes me want to move away and basically start a new life.

So Ive been heartbroken since 2019 thinking my ex moved on then. It’s now 2024. And she told me she was still in love with me until 9 months ago. She hated me too though and didn’t want me back most of those years too. She finally fell in love with someone else 9 months ago.

I’m just now learning this and it’s taking a while to digest it. I chose to become an alcoholic and an addict since she left and I got out of rehab a little over a month ago. I spent 2019 to 2024 completely heartbroken thinking she moved on in 2019, when she felt the same way until LAST YEAR. She just kept it inside. I judged her as a jerk and a woman version of an f boy (I hate calling women a b***, sl**, h*e, w, etc because that’s not fair when guys can do the same thing and just be called f-boys) and she never was. It was just how she coped. Whereas I chose booze and drugs😑

Even though it’s been over two months now , and it’s not like she was really all that , but I was attracted to her a lot and am now alone and think of her often

G, I’m having one of those days where I am missing “us”. Our good and fun days together, the laughters we shared in our silliest inside jokes.. I don’t know how long will I be in this spiraling thoughts and feelings I still have for you. I’m praying so hard that I’ll get through this soon. You said I will be okay because you know how strong I am. But you see, I’m not really strong, I’m just trying to be, I have no choice, I just had to.

Anyway, I just really wanted to tell your mom: Happy Mother’s Day, I hope everything is well with her and your dad.. - H.

I am curious how other people cope🖤🖤

“Bassist Robert DeLeo of Stone Temple Pilots says Perdida (Spanish for ‘loss’),the name of they’re 2020 album,shows how music has helped them process grief, search for meaning and, ultimately, create something beautiful from the pain. “When I’ve gone through things in my life, I’ve found that sitting down and having an honest conversation with my guitar is the best therapy.””

It’s been 8++ months and I still care. I stalk, I feel the urge to stalk. I recently learned from a friend that he has a new girlfriend. I just want not to care anymore. I don’t want him back, I just want to stop thinking about him. I just want to move on. I feel like 8 months I haven’t taken any great step forward.

Did anyone felt stuck for way more than what they actually wanted? How did you overcome this? I just need to move on…

My 26f breakup was pretty much a year ago. The relationship wasn’t pretty, I was very immature and my ex couldn’t handle it (I don’t blame him) and we ended up in a very toxic fighting cycle. After the breakup there was some ‚we don’t talk about this‘ contact and since then we’ve been weird friends. We rarely see each other but he calls every couple of weeks/months and when we need something from each other, we’re there. I have apologised to him countless times and stopped speaking about the relationship. It’s hard for me to outgrow my own toxic patterns but I’m trying and moving forward gradually to become a better human and genuinely learn from my mistakes.

The breakup still hurts me. Some days it’s pretty bad and last week I actually started crying about it again but sometimes it’s also a lot better and I feel okay. Since I was so immature during the relationship, I have a lot of things to care of now and I’m happy to be busy with life and forget about him every once in a while.

The reason I say we’re weird friends, is because I’m not sure if we’re truly friends or just convenient exes, who help each other out. I feel like he doesn’t particularly like me or hasn’t forgiven me, but everytime we see each other he falls back into some old habits and talks in his baby voice to me or just keeps staring at my face uncomfortably. I’m grieving the consequences of my actions but lately i have been craving his forgiveness. Maybe as a lover, but much more as a human. I know forgiveness isn’t something I can expect but it makes it hard to move on, when every time I text him he seems annoyed, but he’ll make sure to call some days later & want to just talk. I don’t know if I can keep up this friendship while constantly still working through the issue, but I also don’t know how I as the more toxic part can preserve my peace and heal and still be there for him, because I don’t want to hurt him even more. I don’t know if we’re friends and I don’t know if I should go no contact maybe, as I am trying to forgive myself and let go. It’s hard to forgive yourself when you feel the other hasn’t forgiven you and you don’t feel deserving of forgiveness

In early January I went through an intense breakup with a man who was my first boyfriend, first love, first everything. Long story short we had to breakup because my family wouldn’t accept him as I’m Muslim and he is not. He also comes from a different cultural background and unfortunately my parents are just close minded and judgmental, refusing to believe that I’d be in a happy marriage with someone who isn’t Pakistani (my background) and that our family will live in eternal shame and fear from everyone else. It’s total bullshit lol but I’ve already had my breakdowns over it.

I struggle a lot with dysthymia (persistent depressive disorder) as well as an anxious attachment style. I literally don’t see myself ever moving on from him. The months in which we were together, I as well as him felt everything so deeply—so strongly…it was truly utter devotion and passion. I feel jealous or resentful when I see other people, especially close friends, in a relationship because they’ll never understand what I went through and the cultural barriers I struggle so heavily with. The cherry on top is that my parents expect me to get an arranged (NOT FORCED! Please don’t intertwine the two) marriage because they’re traditional in that sense, as well as the fact that it’s common within the Muslim community. I don’t know how I’m ever expected to marry someone else, and likely within the next couple years if genuinely nothing works out for me, when I can’t see myself getting over my ex…ever.

I just feel like there’s a gaping pit within my soul that will never be filled again and I’ll have to find things to replace it with, yet never feel fulfilled.

Like most people, I want my crush/partner to think I’m pretty. I want to walk into a room and he thinks “she’s beautiful”.

I know my crush genuinely liked me back. I’m pretty sure he was attracted to my appearance, but he fell for my personality. And that’s what’s important. He told people he was into me, but he had a girlfriend. So it was all messed up because I had my hopes up, but he cut things off with me.

He and his girlfriend broke up two months later. Recently, a friend reconnected us, and I can tell he still likes me. But I don’t know. I’ll never feel physically attractive around him again. And he chose her over me. I’ve never been good enough for anyone, and I don’t think I’ll ever be good enough in his eyes.

Okay idk if id consider this a heartbreak, but im 16 and was talking to this dude for a while. He always treated me like we were dating (calling me ‘my love’, ‘beautiful’, his ‘beautiful baby’, etc, inviting me to his games when his season starts up again, falling asleep otp w me, checking up on me, etc), but then last weekend he started acting weird. And then i asked him what he wanted bc we were supposed to hang out a bunch but he would cancel, and he just said “im sorry” and we didnt talk til he texted me that night. I responded and he ignored me again. So i texted him asking to call n talk the next day and we talked about it then things were okay again for a week. Then this week he told me he was gonna come over, but never followed up when i asked about it. Then last night after he ignored me all day i asked to call later and he was like “call me rn” and he was w his friend (stoned) and was asking me about my day, meanwhile i was like “uhhh i dunno if i wanna talk while youre with someone” and he was like “im alone!” (He was w his friend and even panned the camera to him), so then i said “ill call you back when youre alone”, and his friend goes “dont call back, bitch” so i hung up. Then i texted him asking him to tell me if he was coming over and if not i was making more plans. Then ofc he ignores me again, so i text again this morning (it was harsh but idc) saying “i have plans with people who actually wanna spend time w me, so you do you and go get high and do whatever it is you do, and ill do the same. Text me when you get your priorities straight.” And that was 14 hours ago and obviously didnt get a response, so duh im not texting again (also ik i sound delusional and annoying but he was obsessed with me for a while and acted like he genuinely wanted me) but he hasnt had wifi in 2 hours, not that that means anything bc he had 12 hours to answer but idk i still want him and i hate that i do. I also dont have social media bc i hate it, so i cant stalk on there (thank god, idk id prob cry.) i have a feeling this may actually be the end of us talking bc my paragraph was harsh, and i also hate feeling the slightest bit of discomfort regarding my emotions (ok ik everyone does, but i genuinely refuse to listen to any sad songs even when im not like sad bc i despise any slight amount of discomfort) so now i feel kinda numb and weird. I plan to take some time off my phone like i did today and make plans w my friends and family but idk i just feel really sad. This may sound stupid esp if youre older and have experienced genuine heartbreak an hear a 16 year old whining over a talking stage whos clearly a red flag but idk. Advice on how to not care/get over it!!! Pls i beg 😭😭🙏🙏

My ex left me almost 2 months ago. Our relationship was short, only 3 months long, but it was my first relationship in 10 years. I had a hard time letting people in and when we met it just clicked, for me at least. I am older than her, 34 and she is 25, she left me and said she just wasn’t attracted to me anymore and she wanted to be with someone younger and more fun. This devastated me because I thought I was doing everything she wanted/needed and I was so happy to be with her. She said it wasn’t my looks that made her unattracted to me, so I’m pretty lost trying to figure out what changed in my personality to make her feel that way.

She is seeing someone else now, which is what it is. But I’m having a hard time getting over her. Everything was perfect to me when she ended it. No matter how hard I try to just forget about her and move on I can’t help but get this feeling like our story isn’t finished…even though it is…if that makes sense.

I don’t know what made me want to post this, I guess just to get it off my chest a little more instead of crying alone.

If you read this far, thank you <3

Me and my boyfriend broke up on good terms and we still see eachother and talk to eachother almost the same as when we were together - I’m so conflicted because I don’t know if I want to continue with this and hope he will want me back or if I should cut most contact with him and not see him. I still love him so much I’ve never had such a deep connection with anyone in my life which is why I feel so confused. I’m scared if we stay like this he will never want to get back with me but I’m scared if we cut contact he will complete move on, and I know I won’t.

Why do the people we met, went into our life for only a brief period of time? Being in touch with them is too short, but being in love with them is for eternity. And now, I repetitively finding the feeling again. And am I the only one who keep searching about the same feeling I felt on them to someone else? But the more I searched, the more I land into deceitful people. Why is it so hard to find someone who is as same as your identity..