I’m a 23F and my boyfriend is a 24M. We’ve been together for 6 years (7 in August) and honestly I don’t know what to do and would love some advice.

In March he went to Miami on a boys trip for spring break with his brothers and friends, I wasn’t 100% comfortable just because I’ve heard the stories of what Miami is like especially on spring break. Luckily it was okay, he didn’t do anything and was loyal and he came back and everything was fine. The trip strained him a lot financially, and we had both decided that if he was going to go on another trip he would need to go when he was in a better financial position.

From then, he recently sold his car and upgraded for a brand new car which he can afford but still has a large amount of outgoings as his rent to his mum come to £800 monthly. But with his job, he is able to get by, and can pay his car every month and then his rent and some extra money as well. Recently his uncle passed away, and his mum is demanding that they all take a trip to Jamaica in order to attend the funeral of his uncle. He explained to his mum that he might not be able to go for long, maybe just the funeral and a few days after to which she started arguing with him. She started saying how comes he is able to take me out to dinner and buy me birthday gifts (he bought me a pair of Hermes slides for my birthday LAST year) and bringing up that he needs to be there to support his family. I thought it was a bit weird to bring up things he does for me when he does so much for her, especially as she leans on him a lot financially (on top of the £800 rent he pays to her each month) even though he has an older sibling who lives at home (32M) who has no intention of leaving home or buying a home and also another brother 23M.

I told my boyfriend that I would help him finance the ticket to the Caribbean, to which is was reluctant to agree. But I told him if anything he can pay me back if the issue is about him taking money from me. We then eventually agreed and that was that. However since that conversation things have taken a drastic turn. His brother (23M) who he recently went to Miami on spring break with wants to go to New York, then Jamaica (for 2 days for the funeral) and then back to Miami for a holiday. My boyfriend’s mum has asked for them to not do this and just simply fly to Jamaica, however they’re planning on doing this. I have heavily advised against my boyfriend doing this, because why do this extra trip when 1- you’re going for a funeral not a holiday and your mum has asked you to support her and 2- money is tight as it is! When we talk about it, he just says he’s gonna see and if he goes he goes. Just so it’s clear, I think he should just go directly to Jamaica for the funeral.

Well today everything kind of hit the fan when we spoke, and he basically said to me that he’s got a lot to pay for and if he has to do whatever he has to do to get the money then he will. I was so confused and we kind of went back and forth for him to clear up what he means, and he ended up saying that if he needs to cut me off forever in order to get the money then he will and our relationship will be over. I was so taken aback because what the hell does that even mean, and is almost 7 years that easy to throw away with someone? I even said so you would be willing to end everything and he said if that’s what it takes then that’s what it takes.

I have a large age gap between myself and my siblings, so maybe that’s why I don’t get it but I don’t get why he can’t just tell his brother no and fly straight to Jamaica, even with Miami he didn’t really wanna go but went because his brother (23M) begged him to go and he didn’t wanna say no. But when I have asked him about going on holiday for my birthday, he said that we could but it would all depend on what his money situation is closer to the time, but with his friends/brothers it’s never an issue.

It may sound stupid but I really don’t know what to do, after the talk today he said that by the 25th he would make his decision depending on what money is saying about us being today and if we end it. My friends have said to just end it, because it’s unfair on me. I really do love him with all my heart but it just makes me feel that if he’s really willing to end it on this then how much does he actually really like/love me? Also, i forgot to add that even when it comes to dates and is going out, sometimes it’s a bit of struggle, and sometimes we don’t go out because of money (so I pay sometimes so it doesn’t feel so much of a financial burden) and also sometimes because he doesn’t wanna do things but when his friends ask him to go out he’ll go. When I ask him to go places it’s just a lot more work and a lot more excuses as to why he can’t. Sometimes I wonder if there’s something wrong with me to why he doesn’t want to hang out with me or if I’m just too annoying maybe and not as fun.

Also sorry just for context, with his friendship group his brother is in the friendship group so when he goes out with his friends his brother is always there and boys trips as well. I also have supported him heavily financially throughout the 7 years, helping him pay rent, buy food and also recently with purchasing his new car. But thank you guys for reading and any advice would be so helpful and I’m also so embarrassed I’m even in this situation.

TL;DR My boyfriend of almost 7 years is willing to call it quits on us because of wanting to go on a trip that he cannot afford which I do not think he should go on at all.

Man doesnt lay a hand on me in over 2 months, then like an animal... am i wrong to be thinking its not about me.or.him, he thining about somone else? Where did it come from?

I have a friend of mine from Australia. We always talk and discuss various things every single day. It all started with usual friendship. We go often by just greeting each other while some of our friends are also around the call. Then, it came to me one day that we were left together in a call.

It was a bit awkward at first. However, I never thought that an hour of call would last us talking to each other for three more hours. It was so atypical for him to do that, especially we're not that close. We went off talking about various things, such as our common likings to sports. He also asked me about my future plans or how I pictured my future self way back when I was on my collegiate years. It was really something new for me and that I didn't expect he would ask. He would also make me smile with his jokes. Although, he went off that he needs to leave the call since he has other things to do. However, it left me a remark that he still wants to talk to me longer and he's holding back to do that.

Right after that day, we were on a call again with one of our friends. The three of us were finishing some stuff until we all had the chance to take a break. He went right up telling our friend that she can leave the call if she wants or if she has other businesses to do. As for, he told that he has something I might have an interest with to talk to and that I should stay with him in the call. Our friend straight up left me a text message, telling me that she thinks he likes me.

I just don't really know how men are when they're interested with someone, especially on a virtual setup. We haven't met each other yet and I just don't want to get my hopes up for nothing. So, would you care to give me a piece of advice? Thank you for the helpful answers!

A couple of months ago, when we group departed, a guy asked me for a hug... it was a light hug... started from that day, he looked at me all the time...

Today when we departed, and only him and me... I asked him "do you want a hug?" He raised his hands and said "come on" then I hugged him - I put my arms around his waist as he is taller, my head on his chest, he wrapped his right arm around my both shoulder very tightly and strongly to his body and didn’t let me go, it held for more than 5 seconds... I nearly can't breathe... after hugging, his whole face turned red...

Why did he hug me to tightly and strongly? Does he like me? Does he wanna let me know anything? Or just casual hug?

Update: I have just found a similar photo of how we hugged.. Like this photo

Any comments appreciated

(42m)Broken up with by a single mom (39f), looking for some outside perspective if anyone's willing to help me out with what they think happened?

I apologize for the poor formatting, and unorganized text. I was just broken up with by a single mom with 2 daughters and was hoping for a little outside perspective.. if anyone thinks they could provide some insight I would appreciate it. My thoughts are a bit jumbled and I'm just trying to get a grasp on things as I'm heartbroken over the break up and the fact that I became attached to her daughter's is making it harder as I won't be able to see them anymore either (We're both single parents with 2 daughters each, and full custody).

She said she feels uneasy and doesn't know why. Said she's crazy over me and doesn't understand why this is happening was crying saying this followed up with that she's worried that she's going to lose me as a friend now too. Said there were some things that triggered memories of her ex that she'd thought she'd dealt with but hasn't, and that I wasn't doing anything wrong, they were just coincidences that reminded her of extremely bad and stressful times. But that this wasn't enough to cause the break up. Says she wishes she had better answers but she doesn't know why she feels like this and it would be best if we stopped dating.

I'm upset that she didn't even attempt to work things out with me after 9 months. She just ran? She just decided by herself it was over, without making an effort sit down and talk with me about whatever was bothering her. Relationships are tough, but if she runs when things get hard or stressful, instead of taking a breath and communicating she's going to keep having problems because no relationship is perfect all the time. It takes work and understanding and compromise.

I told her that I was sorry I wasn't a better man for her and her daughters and she replied with

"Hey, it's not about being a better man, you're an exceptional man. You showed us how a gentleman should treat a lady and for that I am truly grateful. I don't regret a single thing. Dating as single parents is very hard. It has not been easy, however I remain hopeful we will both find everything we are looking for."

This just makes me confused.. she is crazy about me, I'm an exceptional man, but she feels uneasy and needs to pull away? There were no major changes in the relationship happening, our schedules were the same, I didn't change the way I treat her or her kids who also loved being around me.

I know she said she didn't understand why she feels uneasy, but i would have liked to sit down and communicate. Maybe we could have figured out what was causing her stress and tried to lessen / address it.

She mentioned she was thinking about the family dynamic vaguely (we both have 2 daughters full time) but didn't elaborate on this and said that that by itself didn't cause the breakup, she was just trying to think of reasons to give me because of how confused she was that she was feeling like this. I'm not sure I totally understand what "family dynamic" actually means in this case?

Said she's always "in her head" and that she overthinks everything frequently. She also mentioned she hasn't been taking care of herself lately and doesn't know why either (thyroid issues). She has mentioned in the past that she's type A and frequently feels the need to have everything perfect/ in control/ just so.. I've never known this woman to pull any punches or mince words to spare someone's feelings so I'm just left confused with.. she's crazy over me and I'm an exceptional man, but she feels the need to end things 🥲 I honestly just want to throw up.

Thanks for everyone's input. I'm so confused.

TL;DR; : single mom broke up with me because she feels uneasy neven though she's crazy about me??.

Does he hold on to his pain to subconsciously hold on to his ex?

I am F38. Ive know my new boyfriend, M47 for 20 years. We were friends all those years past, and he was dating my best friend at the time who cheated on him with my boyfriend. It was a mess.

She really is the worst person in the world, and he ended up raising her daughter from another relationship along with their shared daughter, without her help for the most part. I had kids with my boyfriend also, who became my husband, and though he and did not ever stop thinking of each other as friends we obviously could not remain in contact other than passing pleasantries if we stumbled by each other in our small town.

Now, my cheater ex that became my husband is out of the picture and my new boyfriend reached out to me and we reconnected. Realizing we both always had a thing for each other and missed a lot of time together, our relationship has gone from 0 to 100 in the last month that we have been seeing one another.

The problem I’m having is that he talks about his ex (who was my best friend that cheated on him with my now ex) all the time. He constantly hates on her, and I do believe the hate is real. She was terrible to him. But literally every single day he mentions her several times. It seems like everything reminds him of a time she was horrible or something that hurt him she did and he doesn’t even realize how often he brings it up.

I know he is still hurt even though they’re been broken up for years at this point and she has made his life hell. But it worries and bothers me, because I have always felt like the opposite of love isn’t hate- it’s indifference. Hate implies care. He obviously still cares about her in some way in my mind.

Am I wrong? I realize that people need to vent sometimes, but how can he ever be present and move on with me and focus on our new life together if he can’t let go of what she’s done to him and everything reminds him of her even if it’s a negative memory?

I have a deep seeded fear that the hate comes from the hurt of still loving her somewhere, even though I can’t imagine why when I am not only better suited to him and treat him better, but also she has to be the worst person to ever live.

If I ever mention her he will bristle and say he doesn’t want to talk about her anymore he wants to forget her existence, almost like scolding me for bringing her up then immediately dive into something negative about her that he hates or she’s done or said. He will then talk talk talk about that until the subject is changed, and it feels like him saying “you don’t talk bad about her only I can”.

What is really going on? I want to make this work so badly, but is he still in love and is he going to sabotage this relationship unknowingly by his inability to let go of the trauma she caused? Is this strictly him trying to let go or is he intentionally holding on to his pain in order to hold on to her subconsciously?

I joined office last year, My company is a startup so there were hardly 10-15 people in one shift showing up. One of the guy used to come talk to me, We used to go eat, used to flirt w me on texts randomly and I kept shoving it off as I was more in the mindset of "growing in my career or let's just focus on myself and improve my life".

He is kinda hot looks wise, goes to gym, gets along with everyone around but wasn't my type. He wasn't as social a year back, had been FWB w 3-4 girls already in his hometown.

So we were working and got comfortable around each other. He kept asking to hangout on a weekend (after office hours) w me. I kept denying. He was really nice to me NGL.

I didn't even bother seeing him as a potential to date bc he isn't of my religion so I knew if i started liking him.. = heart break karwane ki ninja technique.

So one day i straightforwardly ask him "what do you want from me?" He doesn't see that coming. & Let's me know that he want to go w the flow and see how things work. tbh, both of us didn't want a serious relationship but he was okay w a FWB or someone he would go out with on weekends ( he kept saying he liked being around me a lot and that he would come downstairs everyday to just watch me leave and bye) & I have had guy friends who have been into me but I've never felt the same back for them since my last "talking stage" with a dude 3/4 years back. I have never been in a relationship or anything of sort so I decided to just go w this for "experience" & more so w a motive to find my own triggers and work on them on the journey.
Both of us were on the same page

Now working at a start-up meant 13-15 hours at work and the time I had left was for eating or travelling/ sleep. And we started hanging out on weekends as dates. It may have started like FWB or just us dating? But he kept making it feel more than just FWB. Used to get me dinner at office if he saw me skipping it bc of work, get my chocolates, check up on me frequently, make sure I'm home safe and everything. ( Which i intially had asked him not to do all these stuff , bc I knew i would start liking him). He had mentioned he has kept girls to FWB only so far and never done nice things to them. But for me he naturally feels like doing nice stuff.

One day on a call, i compliment him on his laugh. He ended up saying "ily" suddenly. But doesn't repeat it. Same week at office, he ends up saying it again. I don't reply back. Why? Bc the first time we were going out, i denied, he got mad & went with another girl to roam around... I didn't like it( usually it doesn't matter to me) and that's when I knew i should give this a shot. So this had hurt me. And I didn't wanna say ily to someone randomly without meaning it.

Now fast forward to few months, We've been out on couple of dates, are besties, we have arguments but EOD solve them and make it up to eachother. We behave like collegues at office but our seniors kinda have an idea that this dude and I are a thing. Now we shift to a new office and he starts socialising w everyone and anyone (good trait). But now starts ignoring me in social settings especially when there are other girls ( to be exact, girls that are more outspoken/ a bit more dominant/ good looking). I've noticed how he keeps looking for validation around such girls. FYI, I'm quite good looking myself. But not as chubby,he is into girls that are bit more chubby than I'm usually is what I know of. So i bring this issue up and he works on it.

Now, he wasn't this social a year back when he had come to my city but has grown really social now. He has stuck to me, not seen other girls. But mingling w other girls from office (they are dating/ have their own guys too) .. he keeps saying how he/we are missing out on opportunities to date people as we are young and we might find a compatible partner (same religion). ( He used to not bring these up but socializing w the "cool group of girls" at office does leave a mark) He has grown as a person into his authentic self in the last one year. (Good for him!)

He gives a lot of credit to me saying, I've been his biggest cheerleader, kind, smart and what not.

Now, there was one point where he started to pull back (better opportunities to date) and i struggled to let go but I did let go. But we got back after a week. He fucked up once by doing something which was a no-go for me. I wanted to pull back, but he struggled to let go. So i forgave him. We got back together.

I resigned bc of toxic work culture affecting my health & it was then it hit me... I've got no friends anymore apart from him as bc of work, friend circle took a back seat. ( & No he isn't possessive about me, instead I'm more territorial of him as I don't like girls that unnecessarily stick to him around or him entertaining other girls which he likes about me). I don't have a job, no friends, no other guy, no one rn.

Now 2 weeks back we discuss that both of us don't work long term & we wanted to end things ( stop calling each other cute nicknames, holding hands and stuff - my thoughts on ending things) But he mentioned how he'd be okay for us to keep doing what we are doing until we find someone else. Which I'm not okay with. " I would rather end things now than continue until I find someone else bc I find this behaviour disrespectful to my first partner" Like oh, i found someone more compatible so now we will stop being each other's go to person. I believe it's almost like keeping a back up option to fall back on.
( However he has mentioned how he's never felt loved or never believed he would find love until he's been w me. He wants me in his life atleast as a friend bc he finds me to be a very genuine person)

If this continues, & he finds a better girl ( good looking, better social status or way smarter than I'm or has her career settled) I'm sure we would still be in touch but it would break my heart if I'm attached to him even a bit. I'm sure it would sting to say the least. ( Fyi, I'm sensitive but because of the life experiences I've had.. I have grown out to be practical in life and one of the main reasons both of us clicked is also because he likes my level of emotional intelligence which he finds to be better than most girls of my age)

So now after we had decided to end things, We still continued to next day onwards haha. Like good morning texts, checking in on eachother and stuff. Day before yesterday, we had a tiny argument and we decided to go no contact until Sunday and see how that goes. Fyi, he's going out to a pub/club tonight with his new group from office ( has girls and guys)

( Even he didn't have friends or didn't mingle much until last year but has been trying to get more social and once he had mentioned how if he has a friend circle than he would treat everyone equally.. nono would get priority. But when i brought this up day before... He said that was last year but he really loves me now. So he would keep me above all)

& Yet I can't help but feel like since he has a social group now, trying to climb up the ladder into "cool friends gang" ... He would keep me as priority but still would look down on me a bit. Or idk if my abandonment trauma is showing up.

He's genuinely nice to me but at the same time sometimes I feel i deserve someone who shouldn't be looking at even a bit of validation from others. Treats me respectfully personally and even in social settings & is protective of me and doesn't entertain other girls even a bit that are trying to get close to him.

Where am I wrong? Or what's your perspective on this situation y'all?

Long story short me and my partner had an argument about three weeks ago (we were trying to plan a trip & he was tired and snapped at me so i snapped back and it snowballed etc.) and he’s been giving me the silent treatment since. There was no indication or statement of break up, I’m not blocked on anything and he still occasionally views my story if I post. but he’s ignored my attempt to reach out and make amends, any ideas why that could be or how I could approach him about it again, (if I should)?

Alright so quick back story. I have been in about 3 serious relationships. After about the 1 year mark things began to go downhill because the "truth" revealed itself. Past trauma, family issues, toxic character traits came out and I needed to breakup with them as it was no longer healthy. On top of that, I sacrificed a lot of my sanity and peace after realizing I acknowledged the red flags and behavior even after speaking to whichever ex girlfriend in the past but because I saw that they had a future ahead of them and working towards more precisely a career and around the same time as me, I let it in a way slide thinking it could excuse the behavior. As mentioned earlier it didn't. This most recent relationship I was in. things were honestly great, I just felt that deep down it wasn't my person there was always something bothering me and unfortunately was to do us growing in different upbringings in cultural, economic, and social settings. Also the trauma she had experienced and rude behavior she acted towards me took a toll onto the relationship and I could not stand it anymore. All in all though, even though the relationships ended on those terms, they all had something going for them and both of us were working towards our careers and expected to start our careers around the same time.

Now I am this relationship about 4 months and dated 3 months prior to that. Honestly the compatibility is like something else I have not experienced before. Grew up in the same environment with very similar but also different experiences. Have spot on views with money, family, world views, how we like to travel, etc. The only bummer is that I started my career about a year ago now. She is still in community college and hopefully will transfer to a 4 year university at the start of next year so it is likely that she will not get her engineering degree until mid or end of 2027. On the other hand I have already finished my degree, been at my job for awhile and its a really competitive and well paying job. I am pursing my masters part-time as well but I have money, the ability to travel, more time, different place/goals in my life. So in terms of compatibility its there, granted the 1 year mark hasn't hit yet I have not realized any red flags just yet and I am hoping I don't. I do have some concern however regarding her future as IF all school works out perfectly, she wont be starting her career for another 3 years or so. I am glad she's working towards her future but I'm unsure how to process/feel that my life with my partner can't get "started" until then if that makes sense. I feels a bit like I need to wait or almost "go back" since I feel I worked really hard to get to where I am and now its like something sort of makes me second guess a lot of decisions or future planning.

If it helps my range of thought is that once this semester for her finished I will have a talk with her regarding what her plan is and learn more about what steps she's taking to pursue that goal. My family really likes her and understand why I do given that longed for compatibility on those important views in life. They are also aware though of the position I put myself in having to wait that long, a mistake happening, etc. My friends who have met her like her so far but aren't aware much of my thoughts on this. I have had one friend tell me to give it until the summer and reevaluate since I am not married to her and another friend told me straight up that my character is worth more than hers. I am hoping that was meant in terms of who I am because throughout HS and College I was huge on grades, my future, networking, community service, my character, working multiple jobs, etc. but she is at at CC, and has a part time job. I understand we're not all like nor need to have the same upbringing but its important to me still that compatibility and because of the way other relationships have not fully had that I feel that this one does, its conflicting

I apologize for the long entry but I would really appreciate others non-biased thoughts. Can you give me your opinions on this as in what you see or what you would do in my position? Thank you.

Can you guys add me ?

Been seeing this woman (20 F) for 2 months , we clicked straight away and slept together after a few dates , everything seemed to be developing well , but during our relationship building she was also seeing her ‘boy best friend’ (dropped her off at his house after first date ) , she told me clearly it’s just a friend and nothing else and not to worry , more dates happen etc etc she would be seeing me and sometimes him (she would tell me about it ) but today I found out her ‘boy best friend’ was actually a guy that fucked her in the recent past (late 2023) and I just feel like it’s a pretty big lie to hide since she’s seeing him still , this was a big blow and after a few hours of finding out I conclude our relationship because of this lie / hiding the truth , this isn’t the first time she was caught twisting/hiding the truth so I gave her back her stuff and told her it was nice to meet her ,I just value honesty greatly if I’m supposed to take someone serious , it’s all I ask for if I treat my woman right , she’s currently doing her best to pull the relationship back , am I in the wrong for ending it ?

Firstly, I want to express how grateful I am to have this space to discuss my feelings—it brings me a great deal of comfort, so thank you all. My partner and I have a big age gap; he is 47, and I am 33. Despite this, we've been together for five years, and I love him deeply.

However, I must admit that while he is generally supportive and kind, there are moments when he tends to criticize me. I strive to communicate and find common ground, but whenever I express discontent with his behaviour, he becomes defensive and redirects the focus onto me. Consequently, I often feel anxious about addressing issues with him. I recognize that I am not always in the right and willingly take responsibility when necessary.

One aspect that has been unsettling for me is his behaviour online. He tends to be overly friendly with women, frequently complimenting them and using heart emojis, particularly with single women. Initially, I tried to overlook this to avoid feeling insecure, but recently I noticed his active engagement with a Twitter account owned by an OnlyFans model. They share an interest in the same football team, and while he doesn't react to her revealing images, he actively comments and likes her other posts. Today I saw a comment, he was praising her interest in the team and the fact how swayed he was about the fact that she shows interest in a genuine way. I got upset about how overly flattering he was.

I find myself struggling with feelings of inadequacy and insecurity, especially considering her youth and physical appearance—she's a 21-year-old blonde with blue eyes and a slim figure, while I, too, am blonde with green eyes, albeit with a typical Slavic look. I understand the slim chances of gaining her attention, but I can't shake off these insecurities. I haven't addressed this with my partner, fearing it might come across as jealousy and insecurity.

So guys...how can I communicate to him that his behaviour is hurting me without jeopardizing our relationship? I'll be very curious to hear men's point of view on that.

TL;DR: My partner's interactions with an OnlyFans account on Twitter are making me uncomfortable, and I'm unsure how to address it without causing conflict in our relationship.

So for context, we're both in the same class, major, uni, & from the same culture but different countries but we live in the US. So the thing had started when I've approached him first to tell him about an upcoming quiz that we will have since he was absent that day, then after a couple of days later he asks for my socials and he ended up giving me his groupme account, so a couple of days later I sent him there that we will have a quiz, but when he did not replied back and he had emailed me, I had told him that I've sent him that we will have a quiz on groupme but he did not respond back, he apologized and told me that he had deleted his socials so he can focus on his study, it was not until 2 weeks ago when he had finally added me to groupme with his other female friend and me (she is also my friend but they're much more closer since they're gonna both graduate in the fall this year) and we began to discuss our classes, courses, etc.

2 weeks ago he also started discussing with me class and courses related stuff from his groupme account in addition to the group chat that he had made with the other girl. Like the whole semester he did not even bothered to contact me via groupme, he would only contact me via uni email. Also many times I would send him an email as a response back and he would not respond back.

He had only added me to the group chat with her becuase he saw that we were both friends.

Can any guy here explain his behavior to me?

I'm (30) going through my first real heartbreak. My two-year relationship ended abruptly three weeks ago, leaving me alone in a city where I know no one but my ex. I've been through various emotional stages, from denial to anger, clinging onto hope that things would reconcile. However, I've come to accept that it's over and have been focusing on self-improvement through physical and mental exercises. Despite my progress, I still struggle with overwhelming feelings of pain and loneliness, constantly reminiscing about our past. I'm seeking advice and shared experiences on how to navigate through this heartbreak.

TLDR: After a sudden breakup, I'm grappling with emotions of pain and loneliness. Seeking advice on how to cope and grow amidst heartbreak.

30(f) and my husband 29(m) have been married for a long time now. I really never cared or payed attention to his porn watching until it came up after looking through his phone. (I know I shouldn't have but glad I did I saw just the amount of porn and girls this man had been watching and it was a LOT.) He claims every man does it as a release. At this time we weren't really having sex as often it was maybe 1-2 times every 1-2 weeks. Had arguments about it and how it made me feel uncomfortable etc. I said no of no ig no TikTok if he wanted to watch it it would have to be websites. And I told him even at that I wasn't comfortable with him watching it but I know he's gona do it regardless and hide it anyways. Whatever ff to now, a couple days ago l caught him about to mas. In the shower. We normally wake up to workout in the am and this day he didn't wake me up. Had to use the bathroom and caught him and I just asked him if he knew where the control was. Went through his phone that night cus I wanted to know for sure and of course he had looked up a couple girls on fb. I honestly don't know what to do to get through to him that it upsets me that he looks up girls and on top that he wasn't even alone to do it. I get it you wana enjoy yourself once in a while but bro we legit had sex the night before 2x. I didn't tell him anytime I left it at that I don't know if I should bother bringing it up or how to. Also is it true that ALL men watch it behind there significant others backs and how often cus I truly feel it's an addiction at this point. He says that if men say they don’t watch it they’re lying. I’m pretty sure he watches it more than twice a week and I’m all for having sex everyday my sex drive is pretty high or if he even asks for a quickie etc I’ve never denied him. Sometimes he can't finish cus it's too hot or heartburn or som other excuse and it bothers me because it make me feel less than and he doesn't understand.

Any guys ever had experience getting out of the friend-zone and into a romantic relationship? How did it happen, or how did you go about it?

My boyfriend is yelling at me threw water on the floor broke his headphones because he wanted to get another girls number and said he was trying to get it for me.

There’s a girl that works at the front desk at my apartment who is from the same country as me I’ve met her and she’s nice.

But now my boyfriend is trying to get us to get together for some odd reason every time she’s down there he tells me she’s working there. Just now he told me he wanted to ask her for her number to give it to me. I asked him why he would do that, I told him just because we are from the same country doesn’t mean we’re destined to be friends she’s also literally 18 YO

I’m so confused, I told him why would you do that? (Given his history he has cheated in the past). He told me he was just trying to “help” me and then he mentor that “well she has a real job” . I’m a graduate student and he has been telling for a while that I’m wasting my time and that I won’t find a real job in time and will be poor and just hurtful unsupportive stuff and now he’s claiming she “has a real” job I told him well if you care about that why don’t you get her number and go on a date her since that’s all he and his family care about.

He started saying he never said anything about “me never finding a job” and he started yelling and throwing stuff mentioned something about not wanting to marry me (not that I’ve been even thinking about it given his behavior he has anger management issues and I told him last week that I’m not going to stay with him if he doesn’t get help because it’s escalating to the point of abuse throwing and breaking stuff)

I’m so sick to my stomach. I never asked him for “help” I never asked him to get his number and now he’s saying that he was doing it to help me and that he was doing it because he was thinking about me. It just doesn’t make sense to, what if I went up to ask a stranger I only met once for 5 minutes that I want his number to give it to my boyfriend. It doesn’t make sense to me, I’m so confused

I (28M) have been with my girlfriend (24F) for a year now and she is great. She is supportive, caring, and a great human being. Recently, however, we were having a conversation about our past relationships and we went into some detail both asking each other questions. She told me her body count was five guys before me (I've only been with one other girl before her). My gut feeling says it’s true but I guess I will never know. She told me she has had unprotected sex in the past and that she once received a call from a guy she slept with telling her he was diagnosed with an STD and she should get checked, she tested negative. She also told me she has "kissed her girlfriends a couple times" just for fun.

What also got me doubting the numbers was her friend circle—they're all about that free-spirited, open-sex-life vibe. Her ex-roommate had this rotation of guys she'd hook up with regularly. My gf even admitted she's got some regrets and that she felt kinda pushed into some of those situations by her friends. I am torn between being the naive boyfriend that thinks his girl is different from her friends vs the fact that she's never given me a reason to question her loyalty or commitment.

I had chances to have sex with at least two other girls before her but I just didn't have any feelings for them and wanted to be more selective with my partners. Has anybody had this issue with their partners before. How did you deal with it? Thanks for the advice.

Hello, I recently discovered my husband was having an affair with a friend. I told him to break it off, or I'll leave. He texted instead of calling. She thought the text was from me. I say call her to make it clear, and he wants to let it be. Should he call and make it clear or not?

My now ex (24F) and I (25M) got into a huge fight over text when I was out of country to visit my family. At that point we had been dating for 3 months and everything was going perfectly. She was thoughtful and kind and I had never felt that sort of connection with someone before, so I seriously considered she might be my partner for life.

Some background context: I moved to Germany a year ago to do my masters degree there. I met my then girlfriend late April and we officially started dating a month later. At the beginning of our relationship I already told her I would be away during the entire semester break at least once a year to see my family and she seemed fine with it.

When I went away everything was fine until the last week, just as I was about to return. She kept asking me to call her and I just didn't have the energy or time (I was attending a lot of networking events for my future career plans and spending time with my family). I texted her every day though and it's not like I never called her at all, just not very often (3 times over the 1 month) so I didn't really think it was a problem. She had told me before that I don't have to text her that often, and that she would prefer to just have a short call each day, but it was hard for me to keep up with that because of the huge time zone difference.

A few days before my return she asked me for a call because she was having a bad day and I didn't have time again, but I told her to just vent via text if she needed to. She confided in me that she felt neglected by me and it kind of triggered me because I was so stressed trying to balance spending time with family and doing the networking stuff, so I did something stupid and I got mad at her. To be honest I got mad because she also hurt me with her statement that I wasn't prioritizing her. I was already trying my best to cater to her needs and I felt betrayed because I had already told her she needed to be prepared for me being away.

I have a huge problem with isolating myself when I get upset (I'm working on it). I was so overwhelmed by the situation that I told her I needed time to think. She sent me a few messages in which she said she understands and she is ready to work on the issue together, but I couldn't get over that feeling of being so overwhelmed by it.

I know it wasn't the right way to do it but I broke up with her a few days later over text. I told her she had every right to be mad at me cause I know it's not right to break up that way. She responded with anger at first which shocked me more than I would like to admit. A few days later she asked if I wanted to meet to talk about it because she would like to move on from the situation and get closure. I didn't respond because part of me was still angry and hurt. She sent one last messages telling me that I had hurt her a lot and after that I told her not to contact me anymore.

The more time passes, the more regret has been heaping up inside of me. Part of me misses her even though I know we are not compatible. I just wish we could have ended on normal terms. The urge to contact her has been getting stronger lately and I don't know how to deal with it. What would you do in my situation?

What would you do if your gf said she needed more physical affection like you had in the beginning of your relationship? If she said it was over bc she has told you many times and things aren’t changing would you change or tell her it’s her fault bc of how she’s treated you???

Why can't I find someone that isn't so sexual or wants sex? Ik there are men out there that can handle cuddling and kissing without it leading to sex....or am I wrong? I mean can a guy and a girl really be platonic friends and it not be sexual? I would like to one day be able to share a space with a guy and not worry if he wants to have sex or not because I asked him to hangout with me. I'm tired of my "weakness" being used against me. Just because it's yes with your tongue down my throat doesn't mean it will be yes when it's over. Hypersexuality or whatever these impulses are suck. I feel like I'll be forever alone because I want to wait until marriage to have sex again. Because every guy ive been with is sexual. And I can't hangout with a guy without trying to have sex with him and expect him to say no... Sorry I ranted but I can't be the only one that deals with this am I?

Recently I started working with a guy who is a few years younger than me, I feel we liked each other for a few weeks already, he looks at me all the time, he purposely keep distance with all girls but me as he is too popular and always surrounded by girls, he cared about me much, always secretly help me, always poke my shoulder and some physical touch... recently he asked me how old I am, I told him my around age, he said "you are older than me?" I smiled and said "Yes", then he said "Oh my god! I thought you are xx" and he looked really shocked... I am quite upset now and think he would just give me up and won't like me anymore.. but the reason I disclosed my age is I don't want to lie to him, and don't want to create false image of being young and hurt him when he knows the truth one day...

Now.. I still need to work with him and see him everyday, how do I act now? should I just keep distance with him (sometimes I keep distance when I think no hope with him but he keeps being around me)? do I act like nothing happened?

Men, if you like a lady without knowing her age at first, will you be turned off after knowing she is older than you, and stop liking her?

Does it mean he does not like me if he keeps distance with me from now on?

Thank you 🙏🏻

TL;DR: Broke up with my long distance girlfriend after 4 years. Don’t know if it’s worth holding on and letting it go?

I (M24) broke up with my girlfriend (F23). Half of our relationship was long distance. 

We started dating during the summer before college. We did long distance our first semester of college. She was in SF, and I was in Texas. Everything was going well. We communicated, loved each other, and did everything to see each other at least every two months. Afterwards, I started to feel unhappy and felt like I did not want to do distance anymore. Then, COVID and we continued dating since we were back at home for like 1 year and a half. (We are from the same hometown). During COVID, we started to have an actual relationship in person which I enjoyed, but we were going to do distance again eventually since COVID had to end soon enough. In August of 2021, I moved to Florida to study, and she went back to SF. We did long distance again but eventually broke up for the first time before the end of the year of (2021). Eight months later we started dating again and did distance for one more year until we graduated college (2023). When we got back together, we tried our best to make this work. We loved each other, respected each other, and we tried to make time for each other without sacrificing or being an obstacle to our social and career lives.

After college, we ended up coming back to our hometowns to find a jobs in our respective degrees. Fast forward today, I ended up moving back to florida to work in my dream job and she stayed back in her hometown to work at her dad's business. 

We decided to end things because she did not feel she had a place in my life right now, and I did not want to do long distance again. She wants to move to Florida but I am not sure when she will move. I am not sure if she actually wants a life here or if she will like it. I don't want to continue our relationship and wait until she moves. She says it will be three months from now but I am no sure if that's true. Maybe it will be three months or six months or a year. 

Like every relationship, we had our issues, but I was not happy in our long distance relationship. Even though I was unhappy, I never had the guts to admit it. I was never honest to myself or her. What makes me sad is that she is someone worth holding on to. She can be my soulmate, but I am not really sure if the universe telling me that we were too young to be in this relationship and that it's time to move on. 

TL;DR: Broke up with my long distance girlfriend after 4 years. Don’t know if it’s worth holding on and letting it go?

Ever since I've gotten older, I have lost my libido. I'm not sure what's happening. I somehow don't even feel the urge to touch myself. And when I do have relations with a girl, I get soft. I start out hard but lose my erection in the process. Wondering what's happening with me. Anyone else experience anything like this?

Hi, 27M here. Long-ish post -- partly writing for catharsis, have posted in a couple of other communities too. Partly just wanting to hear from strangers rather than people close to me. And partly have questions for advice, at the end.

Went through a breakup with my ex (24F) three months ago, two year relationship. This is the first time I had been broken up with. I have been in one serious relationship before this one for three years, and some casual flings before that one.

Things were really, really good. We did everything together, talked all the time, very open communication. It felt healthy and right and I felt fully myself around her. She was always excited to tell me everything about her day and come up with new plans for us to try. Were talking about moving in together. Things went south really suddenly, I could tell she wasn't feeling herself for a month beforehand, but when we talked, it seemed like she was mostly stressed about this graduate program (very close by, importantly, so no secret threat of long-distance) she was applying to. She mentioned strains in the relationship, but when I asked further, she had no further elaboration other than "it feels weird." Unable to get much else out of her, I suggested we wait until after her applications were all done to see if this is partly stress-related, and then we could see where we were. She agreed with this at the time.

Then I'm blindsided as she breaks up with me, first over text after I was getting weird energy over messages all morning, and then a final phone call that evening. Two days before Valentines day, right before we were supposed to go on a small trip together, along with a wedding together later that month. Truthfully, that first month ruined me. You never think the whole "seeing all the hearts and love on Valentine's day" will affect you until you're dealt the killing blow virtually the eve-of. The wedding was even worse. Was my buddy's wedding so I still went solo. Was brutal enough to listen to the vows and be thinking to yourself the entire time "damn but *we* had that too," made worse by far too many questions about my conspicuously absent date. Solidly miserable time.

I know I didn't handle myself well in the immediate aftermath. I didn't send anything bad or pleading, just far too many texts with a false hope of seeking closure, of wondering "how the fuck did this happen when things were so good?" Those unsurprisingly didn't go anywhere, mostly just half-baked apologies and "I don't know what to say - I'm sorry I hurt you" sort of stuff. I naively thought she would treat me the same way she did while we were in the relationship. That we were both people who, even in the twilight hours of our shared time together, were there for one another and would tell one another everything.

Things have ebbed and flowed emotionally since. Some days I go through the motions and more or less don't think about it. Most nights are intolerable though -- the stillness fosters tormented minds. And the mornings where I wake up from dreams about her are terrible too. Initially it was hard because I was still grappling with the reason -- the primary reason she gave being that she felt that I loved her more than she did me, and that was overwhelming her. It still fucks with me if I'm being fully honest. It feels like I'm cultivating a whole different breed of trust issues, where I can feel myself already channeling this toxic attitude of "alright time to play fucking games then I guess, aloof it is next time" that I don't want to harbor. At some level it's the whole thing of being afraid to love again for fear of being hurt again. I get that I shouldn't. But it's really, really hard to not feel that way.

I don't miss her, exactly. I miss the relationship as it was, for sure. But I have fully accepted there's no going back. To restart something the way I feel is not an option, and the way she ended things have permanently changed how I view her, and I would never be the same partner to her again. The damage is done. But I do miss how I felt and how empty those incredibly happy memories now feel. They were happy memories because they were shared. It's hard for me to view them as happy in a purely egocentric way. I was happy because I was happy to have someone's company and they were happy with mine. But the method of the breakup, the words shared since, and how quickly she reset her "digital presence" (yeah yeah I know I should have blocked her on everything and averted my eyes, but I didn't: I'm a glutton for emotional pain) -- all of those combined to make it hard for me believe she shares that same sentimentality.

She sent me a package with a box of my clothes I left at her place (and who knows what else) to the mail office at my apartment. I still haven't gone to grab the box. I'm afraid to see what else is in the box, if there's the gifts I gave her, the art we made together, or whatever else we shared inside of it. It would kill my spirit.

I'm struggling to occupy my mind most days. I used to love to lift, and have been trying to get back into that. Started tracking my macros and lifts again, and I'll keep that momentum for a week before I randomly, emotionally crash again, and spend the weekend bedrotting and feel like I've lost all progress. We did so much together, and I shared so much of my life with her, that it's been hard to do some of the old things I liked to do without associating it with her and having no motivation to do them. I'd honestly love to pull some Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind routine, but the problem is I've watched that movie, so I know how that ends. I try not to bring it up to my friends as much anymore because I know it's tiring and it's been three months (hence why I'm subjecting you, randos of the internet to my emo hours instead).

Yet in spite of all the above, I'm doing OK. But I'm still in a weird place. I just don't know how to emotionally move on. You might have gathered I'm a bit of an emotional, sentimental sap. It's hard for me. I think a part of it is a hurt ego: I don't fully buy the "I loved her more than she loved me" rationale, and I've spent a large (and probably unhealthy) amount of time introspecting to tease out my failings and figure out "how did I fuck up?" Despite everything she said about "you were a wonderful boyfriend; I never felt unloved; I wouldn't change a thing" some nibbling doubt just *knows* I was missing something.

Mostly I think I just want her to give a shit about the relationship. To treat it with some kind of dignity, and by extension, treat me with some kind of dignity. I want some kind of proof that it meant something real to her. I want sentimentality. I want romance, even postmortem. I feel some signal of that kind would give me the closure I need that, rather than words that are now hard for me to treat as anything more than empty vowing that it was a good relationship. But I feel like all I get instead are digital artifacts of our shared history sponged away, and a Pandora's Box waiting in my mailroom of our physical ones. A memorial to love via negativa.

So I don't know. I guess I want to know, for those that were dumped out of a seemingly happy relationship: how did you cope with a detached ex that claims you had no wrongdoing? How do you look back on the relationship with some sense of nostalgia or romance? And if you don't, how have you not become jaded or cynical, or hateful/resentful/ambivalent towards your ex? Am I silly for wanting to see her in a positive light still and be on good terms?

Throwaway because… duh.

I’m in a long term( 5+ years) committed relationship and everything is working great. Relationship great. Sex life great.

If I had a bone to pick (ha!) it’s that he’s very demure when talking about sex. Luckily our instincts align, but I really want to understanding in depth what my partner’s fantasies are. What they like and why they like it. I feel like it will make me a better lover, and will clue me in on ways to keep things spicy. I’ve explained this but he had a repressed upbringing and limited sex life previous to our relationship, so he clams up when I try talking about it. “Our sex life is great so why do we need to discuss it?” He has a point.

But so maybe you guys can help me- I very much enjoy giving head, And I’ve noticed he really likes finishing on my face. I’m game. No prob. I know that it’s a popular thing in porn, but whyyyyyy?

What do you guys get from that specifically? Why the face vs somewhere else? Is it hotter when your partner is looking into your eyes while it happens? Where do you want it to land? Is it preferable for me to do something with it once it’s everywhere?

I realize answers may be varied but I just want to get a general feel for why from y’all and maybe I’ll recognize from the responses what might apply to him.

From a man’s POV, do they have a hard time to resist women that are into them? There’s this guy I (F26) couldn’t help looking at, and he (M35) noticed so I looked away quickly. Somehow, I think he knew how I felt. After that time, our eye contact got more intense other times we met - if you know what I mean. It’s just like you’re looking deeply into each other, a little bit longer than someone you’re not interested in. I’m really attracted to him, and we had some nice conversations. But it confuses me a little because he’s not a single guy. But it gives me “hope” when he looks at me. It could be considered a red flag, but maybe he’s just flattered, so he hasn’t done anything wrong by looking at me. Do you think he would cheat? I know that’s such an ugly question , but I can’t help to wonder about it. I just need it out of my system.

So, I am/was in a relationship that lasted about 3 years. Because of work, we live across different states and she has to take a drive for us to be together on weekends. This was an agreement by us both because I can afford an apartment and she rents a single room in a shared house with roomies. She's also in soccer and football clubs, those are some other things she does along the week...

The thing was, I found out she was hanging out with an older guy (~40) from work in week days. She told me she didn't confess before because she was afraid I would get upset and she was already trying to stop things ( also said she didn't had any interest in him beyond friendship). She didn't told me anything about it and we'll, it indirectly affected our relationship. Some of the activities that she confessed are:

Hanging often to the movies Hanging at his place to watch netflix Hanging out to eat

She spent about 2 hours each time at his house and I don't actually know if she's telling the whole truth. This happened about 2-3 times a week for about a year, until I noticed and she had to confess. So, when I approached her about it she told me she was actually very regretful and she was trying to stop things from going on but she had a hard time saying no. She also told me she didn't actually like that much hanging out with him but since he took her everywhere and she felt kinda pity for him, she struggled to stop the situation from going on. I went through some of her WhatsApp messages (it was her idea) and there were no love things or other stuff, but she did initiate that contact sometimes. She swears that nothing beyond the things she confessed happened and I try to believe that is true. When I approached her she tried to deny everything but the truth came out. We had a fight before because she told me a guy at work was being a creep with her and then I saw her texting with that guy, I told her she was being inconsistent by complaining with me and texting him out of the office.

Tbh I feel that the trust I had in her collapsed but she asked me for another chance to make things right. The things that hurt me the most is that when she was hanging with that guy I was trying to find ways to make her happier (looking to buy a house for us both, getting her some stuff she wanted and thibgs like that), which mades me feel really unappreciated. Also, every time in that year when I asked her what was she up to, tmshe told me she was with female friends or chilling at her room.

On top of that, while all of that was happening she was flirting with other guys from the gym, soccer club and football team. She even dated a couple of them but she told me she felt they weren't as good as partners as I am. That's why she didn't look forward into dating them more. The thing is, I feel like I'm keeping a partner that no one else wanted in their lives and she's sticking with me only because she couldn't find any better.

Now, the tells me she regrets everything and just opened the eyes on how much she was losing in this relationship. She tells me she wants to fully commit into this, and things are gonna be different because she noticed that she was losing the "love of her life". Is there a way to forgiveness into so many lies? How can I find a reason to forgive after all this?

TLDR: girlfriend from 3 years relationship kept dating guys behind my back to find a better partner, she wants to keep going as she feels she's losing the "love of her life"

So, long story as short as possible. (Pardon my lack of proper punctuation, I'm somewhat distraught and discombobulated).

I met a great man on an app August 2022. Both in our 40s, two years apart, both divorced, both two kids of the same birth-assigned gender, but his kids are younger. His youngest and my oldest are 9 years apart. We live about 1.5 hours apart. Everything started out slowly, he is very busy at work and he's very dedicated to his children (and same on my side for me).

We texted a lot, he canceled on me after a few talks of meeting to hike/ out for coffee. Three months in, we were more “spicy” with our texts. Saw each other and intimate at 4 months. Then due to a surgery (I got my boobs done), once I was cleared and we were certain he would not hurt their progress ( he is really into boobs… like REALLY as I learned along the way). We tried to meet, but he didn't have time or an appointment would come up for work. It ended up we really only had time to hook up, and he felt bad with me coming to see him. At one point, he suggested we just be FWB for now. (as his original app profile did say “looking for something casual, long term “ So not a “big” surprise and we were short on free time.) I really liked him, so we continued on, spicy texts and various late-night, over night and daytime hook ups when we didn't have the kids. A few times we hung out, watched TV, hooked up.

Things were ok. I never asked to be a Facebook friend, but recently I thought maybe we could be. He was a friend suggestion a couple of times.

However, he had been a little strange starting a couple of weeks ago, saying he was not all that great, and I could easily “get off” without him. He also teased that he was not going to f**k me again until I exchanged my implants for bigger ones. Which I do plan to do, but he wanted them done BEFORE summer, and that we BOTH needed them. I told him he was wrong about me going solo, and the sex is amazing (which he told me I was the best he had ever had, and REALLY meant it). I told him I would have to earn the $$$ for my surgery, (edit: I think this is where people think I paid him. I did not pay him anything) but I would do it. He then said (joking) he was not going to sleep with me until in did. Then he was texting a few nights later, I was going to go out with friends and for the first time in a LONG time I did not answer his text for 5 hours. (The man leaves me on delivered for days, and now vice versa, so lags are NOT unusual between us).

He double texted that night. (He almost never does ) That (basically )maybe I was really not that excited about him. I wrote him back right away and told him what I had been up to and had not had a chance to write him. The next night we were together, he accidentally locked me out. I tried Facetming him. Left a message (he didn't wake up with the door bell) I tried to FT one more time but I saw him open the door so I hung up mid call. We were together, joking around, talking about my next surgery, wondering if I was really going to do it, and how much fun we would have, etc… He pulled me in for a good morning and goodbye kiss in the morning standing next to his dresser (we both had to work ) and he apologized, because we had to go so quickly and joked about how adulting sucks.

A few days later I get a random text asking if I accidentally FTd him, that he had a sick kid at home, he's working and cannot talk. The thing is, I NEVER FTd him after that one night/morning. So then I got freaked out (I'm anxious by nature… this will come into play later for my question). So started looking as to how and why that could happen. I found a few things that sometimes it's networks syncing. I found a few things on Reddit, and sent links to him told him in case he wondered, that's likely what happened. I had told him a few times I was really sorry, I was on the phone at work, not even thinking about him, and joked I hoped he hadn't seen anything because I read sometimes the video starts too, with what I read. No response to any of that.

Then I happened to be at a state park near him, one of my kids LOVES that park so we go up periodically. I sent him some photos (kids have never met either of us on either side), it started to hail, and I wrote him that we were there (about 20 minutes apart ) and it’s hailing so I wanted to make sure he put his vehicle in the garage. He’s like oh yeah it’s sunny here and I was like well we’re nearby actually. And he was like oh it’s too bad you have your kids and I was like I thought you had your kids tonight too and he said normally I do but tonight is different too bad. You can’t come over for a little while, but they would know. I was like yeah, too bad lol. my kids convinced me to get a hotel for the night and I was like hey I’m actually going to have a hotel for the night, and I can come out and see you for a little bit. First he was like oh no that wouldn’t work, and then he was like yeah do it I need those tits. I need them in my face. I need to bring them over here. and then I finally got there took a while to finagle a hotel and get the kids situated because they’re old enough to be on their own. it was pouring rain. It was terrible because I’ve been hiking all day and it was wet, I was rained on. we hook up and he tried something new that he always wanted to try and we were planning on at some point so we convinces me we’re gonna do that tonight so we did it. he had to get up really early the next day because he had something to do with his kids actually, so kind of shuffled me out of the house, and made sure I didn’t leave anything behind and I tried to give him something. He was like No, no no and he got like really weird and he wouldn’t look me in the eye and he barely hugged me or kissed me and kind of showed me out the door.

he never responded after that. I tried to write him a day after that two days later nothing. No response. I texted him two days later no response. I texted him Friday morning. Sent him some pictures that we normally do regular text that we normally do.

I went on Facebook friends suggested on the night before and I was gonna possibly add him, but I decided to go one of those “pages” women talk to each other. I I’m in a few of those and was periodically looking not that I didn’t trust him but whatever first page I check somehow he’s there. It was two days before we hooked up last time. During that last time, besides he looked straight in the eyes and was looking at me intensely in the eyes, which is a little unusual and the lights were on and everything like that.

Then when I found him on there, I got really upset and was taken by surprised, on there, I got really upset and was taken by surprise, especially since I give him “an out” many times during our time together, even right before that the last two times that we were together, I had given him out.

It’s like if you don’t want to do this, you know just let me know we can we can stop. Just be honest with me and be open with me like we have discussed. Our agreement was to be monogamous, and to be honest. If one of us was done or wanted to do something with someone else that we just had to talk to each other, and that would be it.

so I was pretty upset, and I replied to somebody “that we’ve been pretty close from the last year and a half, actually actually almost 2 years” the woman then wrote “well, any red flags?” and that kind of set off. so I wrote some things about not trusting him anymore and not knowing if I needed to get tested and things like that, but then I thought maybe I should erase that so I did because I didn’t want to hurt his business (he owns a business, and has started to becomeVERY successful) so the post was maybe on there for two minutes - three minutes and that meantime, I texted him that we needed to talk, because I was made aware of information. I didn’t say where I got it. then I looked for my friend suggestion on Facebook it’s gone. I can’t see him. He’s blocked me on Facebook. He’s blocked me on his business page like what the hell? so I texted him again a few hours later. something like you know I can’t believe you’re doing this to me. Nothing nothing back from him. A few hours after that, I texted him you know I’m not mad that he was talking to people because the woman said they were just chatting whatever but I was more upset that he hadn’t told me and that he was moving because one of the people said, she was moving forward with a date with him, and that things were going really well for a few weeks.

Then someone else said he hadn’t texted her back for a week, but he texted her back that day, so I have no idea how long his profile was up there, but it just said just joined according to the picture.

I was upset because not only did I give him an out before the last two times, I didn’t have to do what I did with him that night, and I kind of feel used. He still hasn’t responded. I texted him one more time it’s still blue and I’m not going to write him again, but I don’t know what to do.

Did I do something wrong? I don’t want to seem psycho and keep writing him, but I need some closure. I don’t see how this happened after almost 2 years. He asked me to never ghost him, which I promised, but he’s ghosting me. I feel like a piece of shit. Do you have any insight?

If you read this, I appreciate any advice

Edited for “better” clarity