I’m referring to romantic heartbreak here. It was an all-encompassing, soul crushing, almost visceral experience for me. Like a piece of myself got ripped out when they left. I’m pretty far in my healing journey since the loss—stronger, wiser, and more aligned with myself and what I want in a partnership.

But I will NEVER forget that feeling.

Curious how this might align or not align with the typical ENFP experience. Do you feel things very intensely? What did it feel like for you?

(For added context, I’m either 4w5 or 5w4, sx/sp as well.)

I've thought that i was a people-pleaser for about two years now. I always change my personality when i meet new people, mirror everything they do and always agree with them. I also hate it when I think someone is mad at me or doesn't like me. Yet when I am with my close friends or family I love to debate with them about anything. I just love the feeling of knowing that I'm right and knowing I can defeat all of their arguments. (Since I learned to enjoy debating, I find myself in debates with total strangers. Whose opinions are contrary towards my opinions.) I've always thought that conflicts and debates where things people-pleasers would avoid. But I have learned to love them. So therefore my question: Am I (still) a people-pleaser?

2 years ago I’ve been always an ENFP-T, then last year I had my major failure on my studies. I used to be an achiever and one day I failed a course subject. I noticed that it changed me from being the “social-butterfly” or outgoing person to being introverted, easily gets exhuasted from crowd person. Then, 3 months after that major fall back, my personality test result went INFP-T.

Today, even if I already graduated, that failure still haunts me. So many what-ifs. That failure made me shy, and less confident to myself. From being outgoing to becoming socially overwhelmed. A crowd suffocates me, can only find peace when I am alone. Right now, I just finished the test again and still INFP-T.

But I miss my old self. 😮‍💨 Is there anyone that experienced the same?

Since the ENFP‘s inferior function is introverted sensing, I was thinking if one can ever develop a strength out of this or if it will always be weaker than with other mbti types. Also, what about extroverted thinking (Te) as it is also somewhat one of the weaker qualities ENFP‘s have?

My Grant-Brownsword score is rather… I don’t know… I am a bit torn as I am a mixture of:

ENFP INTP ENTP INTJ INFP

I (21 F, Autistic) despise being yelled at. I will breakdown and cry due to me being so sensitive.

I'm super clumsy. I mistype stuff and click things by accident all the time. It makes me a very nervous driver as well. Idk if it's a cognitive thing or my eyesight.

Hey there! I've been looking for a link to the ENFP discord server but all the links on this forum are sadly expired :( Can someone please share a new link with me?

He's an ENFP-T. So I and him have been friends for like 8 months, and we're super close. He has always been super sweet to me and never fails to call me pretty whenever I send him a picture with my family. When we were on a school trip together, he took some pictures of me when I was giving with my friends or dancing/singing happily. He sometimes even saves a seat for me during AI classes so that we could sit together. He and I trust each other totally and hold almost no secrets. I'm aware of the two relationships that were in and his random airport crushes, and he too is aware of the fact that I had been a huge simp for my crush of 3 years. Recently, I asked him to be regular at school since we've got hardly 3 weeks for the high school to end (he usually takes weeks off from school to study for his entrance), and he surprisingly agreed to it. Also, he told me that he would come just tomorrow and then take days off from school for a week or two again. 💀  I remember this one during the trip; he and I made intense eye contact during a game, and due to the rays of the sun, his eyes looked hazel in colour, which made my heart low-key flutter then.  Another time, when I told him about my big fat crush on a guy he dislikes, he began ignoring me in school and gave me dry replies on text. This was until I got rejected (long lore) this year in the month of September and he and I got back on good terms again. Plus, he often sends me his baby pictures. That's it, I guess.  Does he like me, or am I just being delusional?  PS : Two of my friends low-key think that he likes me? But they're pretty bad at the intuition game so I don't trust them. PS#2 : He has asked me like twice or thrice about who I would date if it weren't my crush

I'm a ENFP but I get into a argument alot. I like debates because i think they're fun. I'm honestly confused because sometimes I'm more of a entp than a enfp. According to my knowledge ENFP's are supposed to be someone who is very open minded and energetic. ENFP's are supposed to be caring and understanding to those around them but i don't really think that way.

I'm very self centered if I have to admit myself. I can't start a conversation without slipping myself in, my ego is quite high. Whenever I meet someone who I think is better than me I would try to be better than them. I don't want people to see me lower than them, I would always try to be a little better than everyone else. I don't like the feeling of getting looked down on. I dont know if this is normal honestly.

I get into argument quite frequently and I'm known to be judgemental to my friends. I get really personal when it comes to arguments, I would slip in anything and everything just to win.

Whenever my friends talk about something, I would join them as if I know the topic and the meaning behind there conversation, even if they're talking about something I would just randomly join in and change the topic. I just realised that after one friend confronted me. I feel so bad but I didn't even realise that what I did wasn't good.

If someone is against my opinion I would start a debate and say anything just to prove my point.

I'm just wondering bc i have always said and thought that i only get attracted to intjs but life happens and now i come to a position of me being asked by entp to have a relationship for marriage with

I love fi always loved it about me and always thought they are only who are able to give real love and the more it's absent (fi blind spot for entps) the less I'll trust a person to love me bc they kinda love u for the love u feel about them and are quite determined to let u go bc they are logically driven (by right and wrong) and not attached to u as a person (unlike fi users tho) & ( all to an extent as well)

If any of you have personal experiences I'll be glad and grateful Thank u so much ❤

Every enfp I know seems to be comfortable with the fact that they can be cringe a lot of the time, and I’m kinda jealous. I’m cringe but I always just lay awake at night thinking of random things I’ve done and how embarrassing I am. How do you do it? TELL ME YOUR SECRET

i saw lots of discussions on PDB about ENFPs not being compatible with enneagram 4. some of them said that ENFPs can only be sx4, and some of them claimed that they can’t be e4 at all and it can only appear in their tritype. i even saw someone saying that e4 ENFPs are actually mistyped sx7s or IxFPs

i would really like to hear some DETAILED opinions on this… because i’m kind of confused

I thought it would be interesting to ask ENFPs specifically considering I’m an ISTP

Hi everyone! I'm an ENFP who was in a relationship since last 3 years. There were lots of ups and downs but I always tried to give the best I could.

My girlfriend said to me some days back that her family is not agreeing for marrige so we should break up.

I was shocked, broken and devastated. After all those efforts and belief of being together after years of LDR how could this happen to me.

I'm not able to accept the situation due to 3 main reasons:

1. I've made my life decisions dependent on us.
2. I always wanted to onlybewith one person for lifetime and cherish the bond throughout life.
3. My mind is all set to be a part of her life and I cannot change that.

Im trying to recover and move on but Id like to have a piece of advice from you people how shall I act and think since I cannot escape overthinking at all now.

Please mention your personality type also so that I can have a gist of different perspectives.

It will be a great help to me, share whatever you can be it a single line or multiple paragraphs.

Life is never easy.

And by "defects" I mean real defects. Don't give me those job interview flaws. "I'm such a perfectionist." "I worry too much about being kind to others." No. I want to know the dirty details about you, the really bad stuff. Especially the kind of stuff you try to hide from others, and even from yourself, because you despise it. But deep down, you know you still have some of it. Come on, I'll start!

• I'm selfish
• I'm opportunistic
• I feel pleasure when I deceive or take advantage of someone
• I feel pleasure when I break the rules and cheat
• Extreme difficulty in resisting the temptation of my desires, even knowing that they are immoral
• I lie as easily as I breathe
• I have a good understanding of how to use situations to my advantage. And that includes the people involved
• I like to confront. Maybe I provoke it on purpose.
• When I want something badly enough, I can go too far to get it, hurting others along the way
• Sometimes I break promises
• Undisciplined
• Always late
• Uncommitted
• fickle

I think that if it weren't for the rigidity of my own inner judgment when I do something that disrespects my "internal code of ethics", I would have the potential to be one of the greatest motherfuckers that ever walked the earth. I swear that I strive every single day to direct all these "bad things" in the right direction.

I’m (29F, ENFP) currently dating an INFP (34) and have huge trouble connecting with them even though I was formerly typed as an INFP.

I find it so hard to give them space and wait for them but at the same time I want to share all my affection and enthusiasm (adopt them) but I’m afraid it’ll scare them off. How do you guys deal with dating I’s and not scaring them off with our affections? And making it from dating to getting into a relationship with them? I’m so lost

The older I get (now 32) the more I actually find most people drain me. Particularly ESxx types. I didn't used to be so picky socially in my 20s. Most day-to-day conversations in life feel surface level and this seems to be the root of what is so taxing. I'd rather spend time on my hobbies or researching things I want to learn about than in social settings that won't energize me.

This is one of the ways I think being an Ne dom manifests, in that we may become more idea-oriented than people-oriented as we age. But I also feel a bit more intellectually-oriented/curious than the other ENFPs I've met throughout my life so that may play a part too.

Also I am certifiably *not* an INFP or any other type; I've studied MBTI for over a decade, lol. Do you 30+ ENFPs feel the same?

I(31M) was flirting with a girl on Halloween, when I asked her about her tattoo she implied she had several more. I told her she could show them to me another time and she started writing her number on my arm unprompted. score! I got the golden retriever energy and wanted to text her all the things: find out what she is looking for, send her memes, ask her out, so much more. But I didn't. Instead I asked "when will I see you again?" About an hour after getting the number. A day later I texted "I liked your tattoo of a heart on your arm, I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve too." No response. Today I asked "are you waiting three days or did you change your mind?"

she texted "Sorry but I'm just not romantically interested in you" and after asking what changed her mind it was me coming on too strong. It made her feel pressured and gave her a bad feeling.

WTF? after a dozen similar rejections I feel like I should purposely start "acting" and "play games" to pretend I'm hard to get, but I don't want to be disingenuous. Last time I waited to reply the girl told me that made me seem not interested. There is no winning. I don't send any unwanted pics, I didn't text anything remotely sexual. I feel like I need to start accepting that love might just not happen for me. I'm an ENFP-T and must have "run" tattooed on my forehead

Back in the day, I was actually really scared of you guys. I never believed that one person can be actually so caring, sweet and appreciative. I hope that you all reach your full potential and never change. I wanted to just thank you for being who you are. Thanks

Initially, I was taught incorrectly about the tritypes. I am a 4w5, and now know that I am also 479 not 749. So, there it is.

Mac and Cheese Thinking Theory

The Mac and Cheese Thinking Theory

Mac and Chess Thinking Theory

The mbti is a theory which is self described as subjective on an individual level.

Combined with the desire of human beings to create a ranking, which here implies social darwinism and the desire to be better.

We can clearly see that some types are better than others.

Introverted < Extroverted but extroverted can be a big pussy when faced with external threats. However, we are not looking for the types that would be stronger when faced with a downwards reality as we are looking for ambitious types, that would make it best in a successful reality. Because those types are the ones that expand upon that reality and end up bigger and bigger

Sensing < Intuitive While the average sensor may be better at picking up fights, the intuitive is a better story teller, better liar, better deceiver and Makes more Money.

While the sensor steals from your local walmart, the intuitive will steal old lady's purses and scam people on the internet, so we can see which one is better.

Thinking > Feeling. Feelers may be considered "good" as they are very attached to the things they value but ultimately a lack of attachment trives in the modern world.

The less attached you are, the better it is.

If you are not attached to the outcome, you are less likely to be frustrated by it, or to fail by fear. You'll just play your best cards and hope for the best.

You'll not be attached even to your life and personal well being. Which is clearly a benefit as we've all seen feelers make clowns out of themselves in the attempt of fulfilling their personal values.

Judging > Perspective. While the perspective types may become lazy entrepreneurs that make money that way, trying to find the easiest solution to a problem, the hard workers almost always get rewarded by the universe more.

Judgers are getting more fulfillment ultimately, making it a better life strategy.

The choice between judging and perspecting is ultimately yours.

Good luck

I attended an event last night (basically a one-night, pop-up, group sing), and the facilitator had so much golden retriever energy that I wondered at first if he was an ENFP.

As the event progressed, though, I began to feel more as though he might instead be an ENFJ. Not only was he far more extroverted than I am as an ENFP, but additionally his focus seemed more on using his creative gifts to bring healing to the community of singers vs trying to foster new joy in the experience of singing together.

(I also direct music-making experiences, and my focus almost always is instead on having fun, making people feel good about themselves, and hopefully helping them to fall more deeply in love with music!)

While I recognize that both ENFPs and ENFJs are capable of both things, it made me wonder if this difference in values placement could be a way to identify quickly whether someone is an ENFP vs ENFJ since the types are otherwise similar in a lot of ways. Thoughts?

So who here has adhd, I really wanna know. Cause I'm trying to see if there is a correlation

There is a video game that I've felt was really special to me ever since I started playing it years ago. I had incorrectly identified as an INFJ for a while due to my developed Ni. However, my Ni is not the same as INFJs: I'm not good at character assessment, predicting future actions, reading people's intentions, etc.

It is more like a survival instinct for me. Due to some communication issues that I have, sometimes things can get difficult for me to understand, especially if people are angry and loud. My Ne+Fi shrinks back in fear since I know that sharing my own feelings makes me emotionally vulnerable in a volatile situation even if I'm compelled to do that anyway. Then in order to get a better understanding of the people around me (as well as my surroundings), I scramble for information in order to have a concrete idea to stand on. I think my first instinct is always Ne+Fi but my life experiences have made me afraid of sharing ideas, I need to make sure you're a safe person first. When my hand touches important information, a flurry of color and understanding comes from that. It's beautiful and realistic at the same time even if it's a bit romanticized. Sometimes my hand touches information that triggers or frightens me further though and all of the sudden my understanding of that person becomes much more frightening. Me Ne takes over and starts making up worst case scenarios. I cower in fear even if there isn't anything to fear there.

What do you do with the constant flood of ideas that go nowhere?

As an ENFP, my brain is constantly overflowing with ideas—projects, theories, solutions, plans for myself, friends, even the world—but most of them stay trapped in my head, unspoken. It’s overwhelming, sometimes even frightening. For example, I’ve had these random ideas for curing cancer (wild, I know), but with just a liberal arts background and a JD, I have zero tools, connections, or the right words to even explain them, so they just stay locked in my mind.

When I’m running, it’s even more intense. I shuffle through all kinds of music, and my mind goes wild with visuals: full movie trailers, scenic landscapes, whole narratives or biographies of fictional, “future” historical figures. Then the run ends, I’m back in the car, and all those ideas, if they’re profound enough, might stick, but most just get left on the trail, buried.

So, ENFPs, how do you harness this kind of creativity? Is it more of an ENFP thing, an IQ thing, an ADHD thing (I have ADHD), or is it just what happens when you’re unemployed with a JD and too much time?