My parents, especially my mom, have been very insulting since I have shared with them my thoughts on jamaat. It’s gotten worse since they found out that I don’t do pardah either. I have already limited contact to a minimum, and when I do see them, she completely loses it:

She insults me. She says stuff like that I look cheap and ugly. That I was more beautiful when I was jamaati but now I look like a misery and no one wants to look at me. I know that’s not the case but it hurts me. She sexualised me a lot in the past and even now she says disgusting things like that I don’t observe pardah because I like how men look at me. That’s why she is ashamed to be my mom. She said to me that my parents don’t want me to be near them. Today she called only to tell me that she would be much happier with me being dead than alive. I’m having a hard time at the moment and i feel like I can’t take all this anymore. I feel too vulnerable right now. In the past I was okay with her saying this but not now.

I’m seriously considering cutting off contact. The last few days I cried a lot because of her. Do you think I’m too harsh with her by completely ignoring and avoiding her? Has anyone of you did this before? How did it go?

Hello, I hope this is the right place to ask as I couldn't not find any other suitable forum and I have to keep anonymity.

This question is more like an observation that I want to put before my fellow Ahmadis specifically in Pakistan.

I've been living in a big city in Pakistan, studied and now doing a good job. All of my interactions and connections are non-ahmadi people.

Now my family is pushing me for marriage and is unable to find a match. I've a good enough profile in terms of looks and career. I can find a girl to marry outside Jamat after getting the permission but for now I don't want to put that option before my parents. I have heard that finding good matches is becoming more and more difficult in Jamat. But I personally don't want to marry outside unless I don't have an option.

I don't even know what I should be asking? I just want to hear from some Ahmadis specifically, how are you looking for rishtas especially in Pakistan?

My other non-Ahmadi friends are mainly doing it through match makers. But that's not an option for us. We have contacted rishta-nata but haven't heard back yet.

TLDR: Are you guys finding it difficult to find a match in Jamat? How are you looking for a rishta? (match)

Hi everyone,

I am an Ahmadi woman based in Australia, and want to marry a non-Ahmadi man (born in Sunni Family). Neither of us is deeply religious, in fact he is an atheist. The dilemma arises from concerns about my parents potentially being expelled from the Jama’at if I proceed with this marriage. To navigate this delicate situation, I wrote a letter to Huzoor, but was advised to seek guidance from the Australian National Amir.

After contacting the National Jama’at here, it was suggested that they would like to meet me in person, and also want have a conversation with my non-Ahmadi partner.

I'm here seeking any advice or insights from you who may have experienced a similar situation or have knowledge to share. Specifically, I'm curious about the questions the Murubbi might pose to my partner and how he can best present himself to maximize our chances of receiving permission for our marriage while ensuring my parents' standing within the Jama’at remains secure. I would be incredibly grateful to hear from you.

Best regards,
SeekingSeer

I find it difficult to understand and misguided when we categorize and conceptualize a group of people largely on the basis of their belief when a lot of what informs the characteristics of the community and the way those beliefs came to be or are practiced is based on other factors. I've seen some comments on here which talk about the kinds of families which converted to Ahmadiyyat early on, mostly poor families in Punjab if I'm correct, as well as detailed descriptions of MGA's family, upbringing and role within the British Raj, although I'm not so well-versed in any of these topics.

I know a bit of what modern-day Ahmadi demographics are like in Canada and Europe, and unfortunately many Ahmadi's I know are rent-seekers from the government and not very different from the reputation of Pakistanis in their respective communities but make up the lower end of the education, income, etc. In fact, I am disturbed by how much our community avoids assimilation, even to the extent of running partially fraudulent or criminal businesses to make money in non-traditional ways. While we're definitely not unique in this, the impact on the new generation is pretty disgusting since many of the apparent pathways for economic success are through stuff like this, and there's definitely a lot of pressure to make money and be successful here. I also do think Ahmadis and other low-income workers are disproportionately exploited by big companies like Uber etc, so I'm not against people doing what they need to do to survive in this economy.

Nevertheless, this is another point of cognitive dissonance for me and maybe others. While all people are fallible, the ja'maat through Jalsa and other events tries to come across as a liberal, professional community. While there are no doubt some great professionals in the community, the majority are not. The few involved professionals in our community are often propped up and catered to, which is problematic in my point of view since it is very much manipulative and in a sense anti-Islamic to hero-worship individuals. This hero-worship is pretty common in the ja'maat, if not in Pakistan and other lower-income countries in general tbh. It's so unfortunate when I see Ahmadi parents flocking to older students to try and extract free labour or help from them, thinking that they can help their own kids do the same thing when they refuse to improve their environment or modify their parenting habits.

I mean, as I'm on the topic of parenting, the whole concept of waqf-e-nau and taking some pledge to sacrifice your children or whatever, and treating your children as your actual property is completely backwards and crazy. Many times when my parents and I weren't getting along they would essentially sabotage me because "anything I did was worthless to them since they won't get anything from it", which, crazy right? For example, refusing to take me to school or academic events, or not paying for anything I needed. To use temporary disagreements with your children as an excuse to sabotage their future is extremely short-sighted. A lot of crazy immigrant parents or religious fundamentalists do this though, so not that unique. I think the diversity in professions in the ja'maat is pretty limited partly because of this weird system of putting some professions which are out of reach of many people in the community on a pedestal, and I hope more people do pursue their passions even if it's at odds with "what the community needs" or "huzoor's approval". Or due to pushing marriage and having kids onto young people who are NOT ready to have a family and are supported by their in-laws to play house and ultimately unable to transition into a career. The practice of importing a bride or husband from Pakistan to marry your aging kid who isn't at all settled down or able to provide for them is very bad, especially when the cycle repeats and they have kids asap and then neither can provide for them.

Anyways, if anyone does have a more complete account of the demographics/timelines of the spread of Ahmaddiyat, and the near ancestors of modern Ahmadis, I would like to see it. I think it would better help me understand the weird things I see in this community and just how much of it is culture v. religion.

Hi so during these past months I have been getting hated by Sunni's in my school saying I'm not Muslim and saying I'm a kafar and I don't know what to do, My other friends that are Hindu standed up for me saying just leave him alone. I have no idea what to do because everyday they always say I'm a kafar and I'm no Muslim. Does anyone can tell me anything I can do or prevent this situation?

I've grown up seeing teenagers and young women criticized heavily and treated with suspicion for doing "fashion", yet the things I've heard my own family members say about women who were overweight, "ugly" etc is so crude and vulgar I'm glad I don't speak good enough Urdu to remember exactly and repeat it. Seriously, its gross and totally unexpected given the clear hypocrisy in their mentality, but it's just part and parcel of the layers of double standards and contradictions in this community/desi culture. I've seen so many older women give "advice" to younger women like, you're going to have difficulty getting married because you're overweight and dark, or you're going to have difficulty getting married to someone with a similar educational background because you're so short and study too hard (like look too tired and thin), etc. They'll make these comments about married women too, even in photos where the person looks objectively good, and just be comparing people in the same photo for no reason whatsoever, which is why WhatsApp is such a disease lmao.

When I first started "looksmaxxing" aka lost weight and wore makeup for the first time at my cousin's wedding, the difference was pretty drastic and I got a lot a lot of positive feedback. I even thought, hey, maybe the desi community isn't that bad! Like, after all, they might be mean to your face but they can also be nice if you look good. Except this was very temporary. Even my cousins, one or two who are exceptionally beautiful, don't get overt compliments as much as they do mild indifference and backhanded compliments/jealousy, and the occasional bad rishta thrown at them. The thing about them is that they absolutely do put a lot of effort and money into their appearance, but they do it for themselves and not for the positive reinforcement they get by aunties or society, which is something I'm learning. Neither are married atm and are focused on getting professional health-adjacent Master's degrees which make good money. And just to get this off my chest, I've never met a smart, beautiful woman that wanted to get married young or to simply find a man to provide for her. She's always smart enough to know her beauty and youth give her power and that it's not a good idea to rely on a man for your livelihood. It's the not so attractive ones who sometimes joke about finding a rich husband, but I just think it's cringe to even make jokes about that given the likelihood of that happening is zero (not solely bc of their appearance, just the statistics overall).

Growing up in this community created a lot of cognitive dissonance for me and this is just one of the reasons why. Marriage wasn't a huge topic growing up but definitely emphasized, and you get told that looks (and income to a certain degree) don't really matter much for either gender but what really matters is religiosity and characteristics like your education, personality, work ethic, etc. This is actually cope and they're trying to mask the fact that arranged marriage is a huge compromise 99% of the time. I'm not actually against arranged marriage, but we in this subreddit know about the inefficiencies and inequality in the rishta nata system well. While I don't see myself getting a traditional arranged marriage or staying in the jamaat, I've seen the same emphasis on looks in marriage and how it's the go-to insult in every single culture.

For women (and men) of colour, it can be deceptively easy to opt-out of making an effort on your appearance because you won't fit the beauty standard anyways, maybe because you aren't light enough, or don't like your ethnic facial features, or are too short, but we really have to make the best of what we've got since none of us can opt out of the overall influence appearance has in how you are treated and the opportunities you get. I'm not advocating for vanity but I obviously have seen a lot of benefit from making an effort to enhance my natural beauty and not live in the delusion that I'll get anything handed to me, within or outside of this community, and will need to get out there and earn it myself. It's also about improving your confidence and being allowed to take up space, and can be a way to take your power back as a woman if you are considering leaving the community since beauty=power, etc. Looking at the data there's a very strong relationship between a women's income and thinness, and other ways in which this is relevant particularly for women.

P.S. How on Earth is everyone here finding people outside the jamaat to get married? I see a post about getting permission to marry xyz everyday!

I wanted to ask if there are any female exAhmadis here, and about their experiences. I'm 20 years old and I've been wanting to leave the Jamaat for years now, but it always seems so impossible to do due to my family. Having such a big family in all corners of the world makes it so difficult to try and do what I want, and I'm always so paranoid about having to face anyone I know and having to answer to their questions about my decisions. It just feels like there's no way out, especially with how social my family is in Jamaat related works, literally everyone knows them.

I also fear that my family would have to recieve backlash from the Jamaat because of me. I don't like how my family have always tried to force me into doing Jamaat related work and made me feel bad for not doing so, so I'm pretty involved myself (against my will), but this doesn't mean I think of my parents as horrible people. I don't want them to have to recieve backlash from the people of the Jamaat just because their daughter has different views to them.

I also just feel like it's so much easier to leave as a man. The men always have much more freedom than we do anyways, so getting up and leaving, or wanting to move out of home before marriage, or marrying outside of the religion, seems like its so much easier for them to do. I'm not trying to downplay any men's experiences as I'm sure it's difficult for anyone to go against their family, but idk to me it just seems so much harder to do as a woman.

Does anyone have any advice on how I can break it to my family, or if it's even worth doing at all? I don't think I'd be able to live like this much longer but I don't want to ruin my family's life just for my own happiness at the same time. Just doesn't feel like I can get away from this.

Hello,

One of my friends is planning on marrying a Christian Girl and he told me that through his process of trying to get approval, the Jamaat wants her to sign a document stating that she does not believe Jesus being the Son of God.

I was quite surprised as to how forward this request was on their part since they are basically asking the person to formally denounce their religious beliefs. Have any of you ever heard of this and is this only an Ahmadi thing or is it a Muslim thing as a whole?

I now understand why most try to just quietly leave the Jamaat with crazy requests such as this, I was even more shocked that the denunciation was to be done with witnesses. It was my understanding that according to 5:5 it is permissible without any special conditioning on it.

If someone denounces their belief in the central Tenet of Christianity does that not essentially render them irreligious in which case they are no longer of the Book anyways? Also, the permission element from the Jamaat also is interesting since why does permission need to be sought out for something which God has already clearly granted permission for?

Looking forward to the replies

here is Maulana Ataul Mujeeb one of the most renowned and recognisable figures at the side of KM4 who mentioned in his recent trip to Canada that hazoor “never ever" told anything that was unfactual he goes on to say “ you wouldn't expect this from an ordinary person”

source

As you can see, I have been on Reddit for almost 10 years so everything I say is true.

Also, I think tic tac toe is a fun game to play, more fun than sharing videos about videos about videos as part of some obscure online feud.

If you have no idea what this post is about, keep it that way.

Hello Friends,

I've been a lurker for some time now and have equally been critically looking into the religion I was raised with but also Islam Ahmadiyyat since that is what I was born into. The more I learn about religion, and this may not be as monumental a realization to others as it is to me, is that it's only half about doing good deeds. Perhaps it was my naivety that believed that religion was a good rubric for providing a moral framework for living ones life, and that simply doing good in the world means you will be rewarded. I now see that is only half the equation and if one is still believing in the Afterlife and doesn't want to burn in Hell forever, they also need to pick the right team it seems. That is a whole other ballpark and kind of leaves the determination of one's soul up to chance since they could be the best of people with the best of character but still be tossed into Hell, simply because they didn't believe the correct principles.

Islam Ahmadiyyat is the prime example of that considering how heretical the rest of the Muslim world views them. Only one can be right, either the Ahmadis are correct in their beliefs or the rest of the Muslim world is (yes I acknowledge they also have infighting but they seem to be unified on declaring Ahmadis non muslim). This also means that depending on which Sect of Islam you had the luck of being born into is also the one you will most likely stick to if you are a religious person, you're either in luck or eternally screwed, unless you reevaluate your faith and then risk upsetting your family, friends, culture and life. I find the "Love For All, Hate For None" quote kind of comical because behind that, I am sure there is the unspoken belief that most if not all Non-Ahmadis are burning in Hell forever. Simply based on the fact that there can only be one true road to salvation.

This equally goes against my understanding of how this is a religion of love and peace because it seems more or less a performative. That love and peace almost goes out the window as soon as Judgement Day comes in because naturally one must assume the position of, well if you truly wanted to be saved you should have been Muslim and also beyond that chosen Ahmadiyyat.

Sorry if this is a bit all over the place if it is, I am trying to learn my religion for the first time and critically analyze it to see if it makes logical sense but I get questions like these in which there doesn't seem to be a sufficient answer for.

Looking forward to the discussion.

Live on April 25, 3pm EST / 8pm BST.

Many of us leave religion with theological and moral objections—Islam in my case. Once we do, we need to create a new identity for ourselves.

See this tweet for a short video of Mimzy announcing the webinar.

Mimzy Vidz and Veedu Vidz are hosting a free webinar on creating an identity post religion. Both are ex-Muslims, and have gone through this process.

Mimzy is also a professional therapist, and understands a lot of the issues both professionally and personally that come up in getting through to the other side from a religious upbringing and indoctrination.

Here's the link to register for the webinar:

How to create a new Identity: Overcoming Toxic Families (streamyard.com)

Both Mimzy Vidz and Veedu Vidz are personal friends and I can vouch for them as knowledgeable, sincere, and the real deal when it comes to wanting to help ex-Muslims. I'm planning to tune in as well. Join us!

#Identity #MentalHealthSupport #ToxicFamilies #EmotionalBlackmail #Guilt #Gaslighting

Event Description

Emotional blackmail, gaslighting, and guilt-tripping are sadly normalised in many families, this creates a pressure to conform to roles that don't align with our true selves.

It's common to carry the heavy burden of expectations, often feeling as though our autonomy is overshadowed by inherited obligations.

If you're eager to break free from these constraints, to embrace your own values and aspirations, to forge a new identity that reflects your authentic self, this webinar is for you.

Discover how to shed the weight of trauma that has shaped your inner conflicts, paving the way for a future filled with excitement rather than perpetual guilt.

Join us as we explore how to heal, establish boundaries and fulfil your goals!

KM4 in this video is discussing a long debunked anti Semitic conspiracy theory the protocols but is claiming he read about a former British PM who is alleged to have said that the Jewish conspiracy would've had to be faked by a prophet of God as everything mentioned in it has come true

However it can also be said that if in fact a British PM had said this they would surely have been denounced for making such a remark

The protocols were first translated and published in England in the 1920s

Date: 25/03/1996 Q/A session in English

This post is a mirror of the content policy announcement available on the QIA subreddit wiki.

TL;DR?

We will be focusing on supporting ex-Ahmadis, ex-Muslims and questioning Ahmadis who at the same time, are also questioning Islam. Please take sectarian debates between believing Ahmadis, Sunnis, Shias, Qur'anists, etc., to other subreddits. Thank you!

QIA Content Policy Announcement: April 2024

To the QIA Community,

We are updating our content policy to ensure that the subreddit continues to serve its original purpose as envisioned by its founding team of moderators. Our original aim in creating the subreddit and volunteering as moderators was to provide a space for people questioning or having left Islam, coming from the Ahmadiyya denomination.

In recent years, there have been times where that voice and the topics we seek to give space for discussion have been drowned out by sectarian discussions between various factions within Ahmadiyyat, and between various factions claiming to represent Islam: the mainstream, the traditional, the orthodox, the Shia, the Sunni, the Quranists, the Ahmadis, etc.

We believe those discussions have value and meaning for the people involved. However, it is not part of our mission to referee such topics (even though we have tried to facilitate that at times), just as content on r/Christianity is similarly not relevant for this subreddit.

We do believe in the importance of free speech. We also believe that no subreddit should be forced to host posts that fall outside their intended area of focus. As such, we will now direct off-topic posts to other subreddits who are actually eager to host such discussions. We recognize that most sectarian factions are weary of discussion on anything but their “home turf”. However, this is not our problem to solve. Certainly not when all of our mods are volunteers.

We hope that all of you within the Muslim ummah will be able to have these important conversations on forums whose purpose is to facilitate intra-Islamic discourse.

Below are the key changes and guidelines, now in effect:

1. Interdenominational theological debates

Interdenominational theological debates will now be removed.

These include critiquing Ahmadiyyat from the lens of an alternate interpretation of Islam.

In the future we will suggest that posts from ex-Ahmadis who are still Muslim be posted on other forums, unless they are also highly relevant to an ex-Muslim+ex-Ahmadi experience.

Examples (certainly not an exhaustive representation!) of posts that will no longer be accepted:

• "What did Ahmadiyyat bring that improved upon the already existent perfection of Islam?"
• "Why the Ahmadi Muslim technique for wudhu uses the wrong thumb positioning when rubbing behind the ears as compared to the original Hanafi espoused method."

Such posts will be removed. Posters are kindly asked to post to other subreddits for such topics (refer to the automated message you receive whenever you post).

2. Theological Focus: Critique of Islam

Our theological focus is on ex-Muslim voices and the critique of Islam through an Ahmadiyya-relevant lens.

In the past, we’ve directed general critiques of Islam to the r/exmuslim subreddit. However, we now recognize that there’s value in many of those discussions happening here.

Firstly, there’s a different culture on r/exmuslim than we are fostering here on QIA.

Secondly, critiques of Islam generally help keep this subreddit’s content focused on the critique of Islam. Just be sure that the post plausibly relates to, is adjacent to, or is an interesting juxtaposition to the Ahmadiyya interpretation of said topic.

To be sure, topics unique to Ahmadiyyat but which directly or indirectly also put Islam and its claims under scrutiny are what this subreddit was created to provide a forum to discuss.

3. Support Focus

Our support focus is geared towards ex-Muslims, questioning Ahmadi Muslims, and believing Ahmadi Muslims.

We, the community of this subreddit, are generally keen to help those struggling with matters related to growing up in the Jama’at.

If you have left Islam and the Ahmadiyya Muslim Jama’at altogether, we are here to support you. If you are questioning Ahmadiyya Islam, we are here to support you. If you are still a believing Ahmadi Muslim, but struggle with making sense of certain policies, practices, or in navigating challenges with family, we are here to support you.

However, if you’ve now moved on to a different sect of Islam, we advise you to post in an alternate subreddit, such as r/ExAhmadis or r/Islam_after_Ahmadiyya.

Examples of posts that will no longer be accepted given alternative venues available for these sectarian issues:

• A born-Ahmadi, but now Sunni Muslim seeking advice on how to marry their Sunni fiancé.
• A born-Ahmadi seeking advice on how to convince one’s parents to accept their new Salafi Muslim beliefs and identity.

4. On New Posts that Should be Comments

New posts that are better served as comments on an existing post will be removed.

Do you have a follow up to a recent post? Great. Leave a comment on the existing post. Don’t create a new post for your comment, even if you have a new angle to your argument and especially if you are the person who made the original post on the topic.

Abusing the visibility provided by a new post on the subreddit will no longer be tolerated. Topically redundant posts will now be removed. Yes, this even applies to critics of Islam (generally) and/or Ahmadiyyat (specifically) trying to bring more attention to a topic by creating a new post instead of commenting on a recent, existing post.

Contributors should add a comment to an existing post if new information or arguments are being made on a topic that has been posted about in the last 30 days. Post authors (“OP”s) are also welcome to append new content to their original post body, provided the new content is clearly identifiable as a later addition. We recommend using a heading like:

“UPDATED ON <date>:”

Provide the date to clearly delineate what is updated material from what was there in the original post and/or previous updates.

We strongly believe readers are better served by being able to see all of the relevant arguments and counter-arguments in one place (i.e., a single subreddit post). An exception will be made for response comments that are (1) exceptionally detailed, (2) well crafted, and (3) which bring up significant new information.

Moderators will exercise our editorial control to remove posts which we deem do not meet this 3-point criteria. If your post gets removed, consider appending the new content to an earlier post of yours, or responding with a comment on an existing post written by someone else on the same topic.

The objective here is to protect the subreddit’s main page from what is effectively an abuse of the topics feed.

5. Redirection to Sectarian Subreddits

Posters will be directed to other subreddits.

We will now send a private direct message through a bot to each poster. The message will include a link to this announcement and to our subreddit rules. If you make a post, you will receive this every time, with every post.

With our volunteer mod team, we can no longer guarantee that post removals will get individualized follow-up explaining why a given post warranted removal.

We will expect that in most cases, by reading this announcement, posters will understand why their post was removed. These automated messages will also include options on the alternative subreddits posters may wish to post to, instead.

Please note that our referrals to other subreddits are merely suggestions. We are not affiliated with any other subreddit focused on Ahmadiyyat, nor can we vouch for their moderators, their practices, or for the safety of interacting with their communities.

As always, be vigilant and minimize the personal information you share with unknown persons on the Internet, whether on Reddit, Discord, or elsewhere.

6. Editorial Decisions

Moderators will exercise our editorial right to make exceptions.

From time to time, the mods of this subreddit may find that what is normally off-topic for the subreddit (as mentioned above) is worth making an exception for because it helps shine a light on a point we believe to be relevant to an ex-Muslim audience.

This sometimes happens, for example, when witnessing the minutiae of inter-sectarian squabbles regarding fiqh and how they can make people reflect on whether the Abrahamic deity is even intelligent, moral, or worthy of worship. We suspect that perhaps only a few posts in any given year will be granted this editorial exception.

In addition, moderators will now apply a lower tolerance for what we deem in our editorial capacity to be low quality posts. See Rule 3: Contribute with intelligent, constructive, and high quality posts for details.

Useful Resources

• QIA Subreddit Rules
• QIA Subreddit Wiki
• QIA Subreddit Collections
  • How and Why We Left
  • Women and Ahmadiyyat
  • Mirza Ghulam Ahmad
  • Counter Apologetics
  • On “Marrying Out”: rules, logistics, resources, and experiences

In this video Hazoor told his Dream that he seen a while ago about starting of WW3. He mentioned that it’s a PROPHECY of Holy Quran.

He also said that Allah will protect AHMEDIS and when WW3 over all Arrogance and denial of west will be vanished .

Then they look for GOD and salvation, then most of survivors will accept TRUE ISLAM.

https://streamable.com/h7b5z3

As I live in university dorm away from my family, I can just lie every week when asked if I have written a dua letter to Huzoor or not. Vacations are different though.

It is obligatory to write one every Friday or Saturday. What do I write? Salam, hoping he is well, pray for us, Allah be our hafiz nassir and hadi. I don't find anything else to write. What does my mother write? I don't know. But I see her writing on both sides of a page and I literally wonder why she has that much to tell huzoor.

Because- no matter how much you right, you get the same old templated reply from his PS saying that huzoor is praying and that we focus more on dua for our spiritual development. Literally same lines, maybe paraphrased, but I see no difference.

I heard people say that the dua letters helped them a lot, like, they were in some kind of problem, they wrote a letter and even before they posted it the problem was solved. And according to them it happened because the barakah starts from when one starts to write the letter.

Has such thing ever happened to anyone, or anyone you know? IMHO I haven’t seen it. Only heard stories.

Last but not least - a story. In my new high school we had co-ed system so my mother told me to write a letter to huzoor for permission. I said I would write one, then somehow managed not to. In the meantime I got admitted and classes started. Then one day she asks me if I had written a letter. I say yes i did. She asks my father if he had sent it. He says yes he did.

I wrote no letter, my dad sent no letter. I graduated with a goon enough result to get into a public uni and also managed to get a guy from there. Where did the blessing come from I wonder...

Hello all, I recently entered the fold of Ahmadiyaat. I wanted to know if someone has hurt you within the community such as bullied or disrespected you what happens. I have written letters to Huzoor and regionals are aware but what are the consequences. Is there any intervention or dialogue. How long do such things take?

Here is a clip of KM4 endorsing The former Pakistani military dictator Parvez musharraf this video seeks to re-evaluate this endorsement by proving counter arguments

source

Musharraf was the military dictator of Pakistan who seized power in 1999 and then served for a decade as the president and from 1998 to 2007 as COAS he is particularly known for his role in the kargil war

Hey, I have a question and that is if all 5 pillars of religion are the same as other Muslims and the book is also the same. Moreover ahmadi tend to call themselves part of ummah of Muhammad (saw) when they have a complete different prophet to follow. What was the actual need of a different prophet for Allah to send if there were Muslims already at big numbers?

Since my childhood I was told that KHALIFA IS CHOSEN BY GOD. When I was growing up I started watching حضرت خلیفہ المسیح الرابع رضی اللہ عنہہ videos / Q & A , Khutbas & Darsul Quran. NO DOUBT he was true representative of ALLAH.

Later on his all videos became available on YouTube. I almost watched all and I developed Greater understanding of Allah / Quran / Holy Prophet ( PBUH )

So I made it part of my faith that KHALIFA ALWAYS SELECTED BY ALLAH.

This was background info.

When HKMIV Passed away at that time I used to reside in RABWAH. Mirza MASROOR AHMED was NAZER E ELAH at that time. My one used to work in his office, he came to be and TOLD ME HE WILL BE NEW KHALIFA.

I told him how come you know ? He said wait for 2-3 days. I have a source inside. When he announced KHALIFA I was stunned and whole of my BELIEF SYSTEM COLLAPSED as I already told he will be new Khalifa.

SINCE 2003 TO THIS DATE, HE FAILED PATHETICALLY IN ALL & EVERY FIELD.

He is not even 1% of HKM4.

Then I thought like KHALIFTA RASHIDA there were only 4 rest was POLITICALLY APPOINTED.

So I think MIRZA MASROOR AHMED just as ADMINISTRATIVE HEAD OF JAMMAT. Not a SPIRITUAL LEADER.

Then I asked one SENIOR MURABBI what if I want to come out of his BAIT. What is Process. He told me write a letter to him and tell him BUT YOU WILL BE KAFIR THEN.

I don’t want to be kafir. JUST is that my heart don’t accept him as chosen by Allah . Surely if they decided before then WHY TO PUT ON ALLAH ?

If same rule continues then next head will be SHAH SB who is very rude. Surely I will not accept him as chosen by God.

SO MY ONLY QUESTION IS, IF I GET OUT OF HIS BAIT, WILL I BE DOING A TERRIBLE THING ? AND BECOME KAFIR

Self explanatory title something which keeps biting me even I try to stay in or out of the community or religion

The same compass growing up which made me question ahmediyya aswell.

Maybe it’s a me problem but I had continued to impact my longing for a community and my disillusionment from community/groups in general as a general rule I have difficulty in accepting large organized groups to be

I find that growing up in a cult vs the upbringing I had which wasn’t directly influenced by Core jamaati dogma but just rather set of values/beliefs. Has left me with very strong moral compass even though I don’t even believe well Haven’t believed in religion from probably almost a decade of life when I had a very direct exposure with Jamaat, Royal family and their antics.

Buttt growing up I had these values instilled in me which have a very low tolerance when it comes to the “flexibility” people exercise in life when morality comes into play.

How are ppl able to reconcile this difference I will give you an example

I meet, speak ppl of my age and some even not of my age. I will present them with hypothetical situations and they will often go with a path of convenience and back up their lack of moral strength with some poor ass mental gymnastics but the same people when they have to judge other people they will turn a blind eye to the same flexibility but would rather have a very objective lens or definition?

I am not sure if you follow but it seems like growing up I have been somehow been raised or made to believe about the absolute morality. This in turn has made me always follow belief system with an emphasis on altruism and general honesty.

But I have come across people more than often be okay with being hypocrites or have double standards including when they don’t believe but keep community ties Or even when they don’t believe but engage in the culty hypocritic behaviour?

Including meeting friends and family who agree Jamaat is fucked up but they all to me are by default being hypocrites when they admit there’s a lot of fucked up shit but they don’t do anything rather they get in the take what you can mindset which is again is sorta shitty for me to think abojt

This has made me long for an alt community but at the same time made it harder to long because I have particularly higher standards of Morality infused with free thought and skepticism

Wanted to see if someone sees it the same or my therapist can just be like oh why are so judgmental bla bla bla

To be fair I am not even cultural Ahmedi I am more like culturally moral Muslim skeptic

Hey everyone, hope you are doing well.

I wanted to share a dilemma I am going through and feel like this is the place to share it. For a good while, I don't consider myself to be an ahmadi, because it has far too many flaws to be calling itself perfect. ALL of my family are devout ahmadis, and it is extremely difficult for me to officially quit the jammat. I am so tired of the fake BS I have to go through each Friday sermon of hazrat such and such and how great they were, and how some people have sacrificed so much for the jamaat and how we should do the same. Then these murabis come to dorah to my house to tell me to increase the chanda, write letters to pyare hazoor, or tell them my personal life issues and ask hazoor to pray for them. idgaf.

But aside from that, there is another quagmire I have put myself into. I consider myself to be ex-muslim, I disagree with a lot of stuff Allah and his messengers have to say through the quran and hadees. An omnipotent, extremely intelligent god who made the unfathomable universe inspired his best messenger to marry his best friend's pre-teen daughter. But after my dad passed away in 2020, I found myself reaching back to Islam. After a look at myself, I found out this is me coping because believing in Islam means my dad could be in jannah and be aware of my life happenings, and maybe there is a chance I could meet him. But that makes me a hypocrite... I don't believe in god. I have moved on from my Dad's passing, but this is the only thing that bothers me. Eliminating god means accepting that my dad is gone forever. The words are getting harder to type now. But, I feel better letting this out.

Asalamoalaikum

I am M29 living in Germany I have recently found this reddit forum and have also started to doubt the truth fullness of ahmadiyat.

I recently came out to my parents about my views and save to say they were not pleased. Infact my mom is such a strict ahmadi she started crying and doing emotional blackmail saying if I dont came back they will ostracise me.

Now she wants to take me to a local murabbi to have my doubts cleared which i don't believe will work.

I just wanted to get some tipps or questions I can ask the murabbi in the meeting any doubts or contradictions that made you leave the jammat that I can find confidence in.

Thanks in advance.

The only male victim who was killed in Sydney's Bondi shopping centre attack was a 30 year old Ahmadi refugee who was working as a security guard by the name of Faraz Tahir who had moved from Sri Lanka only a year ago i for one unreservedly condemn the attack

It seems the perpetrator is an incel who suffers from mental illness but Tahir ended up being caught in the crossfire as it's reported he intervened which tragically led to him losing his life in the line of duty https://www.reddit.com/r/australia/s/D0UD152yKC

I recently had my Nikkah done but the girl is not willing to go ahead, my first option is ofcourse reconciliation but I was wondering that if it doesn’t workout then do I have any obligation by court of Pakistan to pay haq mehar even though the nikkah is registered in nadra or court. I am not worried about any restrictions or punishments of jamat just want to be informed if government of Pakistan can take any action or not.

When i was younger i was completely derailed off Islam, but alhamdolillah i took my shahada again 3 years ago to start again properly and im a devoted muslim. But ive distanced myself from the jamaat even though my mother is still very involved and believes in it. I met a guy online a year ago and i can safely say hes the love of my life and i want to marry him, ive told him about the jamaat and hes willing to “convert” into the jamaat for me. Is there any advice for the UK jamaat on conversation for the sake of marriage? I remember a couple years ago Huzoor heavily discouraging this type of conversion so id like some advice on how we can best tackle the situation. Jazakallah

(I'm not fluent in english, sorry beforehand)

I remember in middle school where I had the dilemma of wearing of hijab or not... I thought everyday while I was wearing it if I would be happier to stop or continue having hijab. I felt the burden of my hijab, it felt like hand cuffs everyday however would I be happier without them? I dream of the wind drifting through my hair, I can't describe this exact feeling...but I know it makes me glad to be alive. In midfle school, 8th grade I think I took the hijab of after my female classmates assured me nothing will change. So I took it off and I felt better..at first. After a while I was stressed, I wanted to wear it again, I was stressed my dad would found out or other aunties, I felt so lost in fact I could not enjoy my freedom. Till graduation from middle school I had this dilemma ongoing never being truthfull towards the world. I didn't invite my parents to my graduation bc I had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing the hijab and my classmates? I couldn't possibly tell them why my parents are not there... Two empty seats reserved for my dad and mom whom I did not invite. Afterwards my mom told me she would've loved to see me and hear my speech and it broke my heart.

So I concluded to wear the purdah in high school, that my parents could go to my final graduation. I was depressed, I felt I could not breath in it as if it would strangle me ofc I knew it was psychosomatic but I had difficulties. I didn't care what clothes I was wearing bc my parents were demanding from me to wear a coat too in classes. And I stopped caring if my hair had to be washed or not. I was depressed. My parents went to my graduation, I was proud to be with them, show them my teachers, friends, etc.

Now present time I'm living a double life, I'm a student who changes her clothes secretly, who is going through the same phase as in middle school. I have this dilemma, both options are making me mad but I can't leave my parents yet. I'm still dependend on them physically and emotionaly.

I'm going to change my university soon and my parents are demanding from me to study in my hometown but I can't. If I would, I had to wear the purdah again hide my real me for possibly 3 years....I just can't...

Idk what to expect but I would like to hear some similar experiencies or some advice would be nice :)

Have a great day everyone ^^

Hello good people, brothers and sisters; good morning/afternoon/evening and Jummah Mubarak.

If you have my profile visited you'll see I am still new in reddit. I created a profile only after seeing that a community (or communities) of people who left Ahmadiyyat exists. I found out just a few days ago and I've read a lot of posts and comments so far, and figured that I was never really alone.

I have a story that I wanna tell. But as y'all know, not everyone can understand or feel me. My non-ahmadi friends would just tell me to leave, which is not THAT easy; and my Ahmadi friends - y'all know what they might say.

My family is a really devoted one by the way - specially my mother, she used to be a regional sadr before we moved from that region. I was raised in a moderately religious environment, since I was a kid I was active in all programs - like serving water or holding placards in ijtema or jalsa; competitions and exams in local and national jamaat etc. In local levels I was always in the 1st or 2nd position in every competitions when I was a nasirat. In national, maybe 5th or 6th, but that's not that bad considering there was a lot more competition.

I am a believer - I believe Allah is out there and everywhere, and that he listens to my prayers. I have experiences of my own, and I even see dreams that come true; even though I mentally quit the jamaat. More on that later, maybe. For now I'mma just share some bitter experiences in the jamaat as well as in my family.

1. Jalsa. I was an introvert kid and never engaged in any kind of noises and messes kids make. I had a good reputation about it and most of the members in national lajna knew me for either this or for the post my mother was in, or both. In jalsa y'all know there is always a noisy kids' zone, and I never really thought I'd be sent there because I was 12 and I was attentively listening to the speeches. But that is exactly what happened - some discipline aunty came towards me and started scolding me that she told every kid and their mothers to go upstairs, why I was still there. I had an aunty of mine sitting with me since my mother was also working in the discipline sector. My aunty was not that much of a talker but she somehow managed to say that my mother was also working, I was alone, and I wasn't making any noise either - but the discipline aunty didn't even let her talk and just grabbed me, pulling me towards the door. I was almost crying, begging her to let me go, that I'll be good, she didn't listen. Right in front of the door I saw my mother working, I called her but she was busy so she didn't notice. But the aunty who was grabbing me, when she saw I was calling my mother she just pushed me out of the door hurriedly and told me to go upstairs. i was all alone there, as I didn't have much friends, there was a lotta noise, and I couldn't hear the speech. I was always a quiet kid and I never went or sat anywhere alone. I just cried silently until the lunch break. It was the beginning of first session.
2. Dua. I don't even wanna get started *laughs hysterically* every time something bad happens, my mother says this happened because we didn't pray much, that we still lack in namaz etc. Now, here's the thing that I believe - it takes the desperation of one to make dua work, and also you won't be having what you want if you don't have your rizq for it. These are the two things I keep in my mind when I pray to Him. Last year I had a job examination, my first job exam that was. and very few people actually pass their first job exams. I am not that extraordinary so I failed. I knew I'd fail right after the exam because I had a dream about it, so I wasn't that upset because I knew I would have much better things in life. but when my mother got to know the result, she first blamed it on me for not praying correctly, then she blamed me because SHE COULD NOT PRAY FOR ME yes that is a thing too, and then she blamed me again for not going to masjid regularly and refusing to take the responsibility of secretary maal the year before (I was given the responsibility but i refused since I live in university dorm, masjid was far away, I had to go home every 2 months and dorm isn't really safe for an ahmadi)
3. Spying. I'm sure everyone is pretty familiar with this. But I don't think anyone could match the energy the members of our local (where my family live rn) jamaat has. They'll know the deepest and darkest secrets about you, will gossip among literally everyone and you will have no idea for years. Just a small example - my cousin married his non-ahmadi girlfriend. The family got to know about his affair just a few months before the wedding took place. The lajna members knew it for the past 3 years - THEY WERE IN A RELATIONSHIP FOR 3 YEARS. They even had photos that the family never saw. And that, my friends, is just the tip of the ice berg. Once there was a local lajna ijtema and Ameer sahib was giving his speech. In the speech he literally said - "You should keep your daughters under your surveillance. Where they are going, who they meet, when they are going out and coming home - everything should be under your supervision."
4. Last but not least - the women, and marriage. It seems like in jamaat it's only the women and girls who get married:) all the lajna program focus on the necessity of marriage and how to become a good wife and mother. In local meetings, parts of the book 'Marriage and Life' by KM4 would be recited. In jamaat the education of women, both academic and religious, has only one purpose - to create an educated next generation. There was a program that was targeted for the young and unmarried lajnas, in the end of the program every young lajna was given a nice little box as a gift. When we were receiving the gifts the announcer literally was saying - "You'll keep your cosmetics and make up stuff in this box, and don't forget to use them before coming to masjid. If you do that then men's mothers and matchmakers will notice you and you'll get good proposals." And here's what makes me feel way much more low than any other thing - that only women are taught about marriage, the importance of a partner and children etc., but i never heard of any program or speech where men or boys are told to prepare themselves for their partners. One sided?

Sooo that is all for today. I feel like I am relieved from a huge burden on my shoulder. Thanks to whoever created this community, and please post a lot everyone, I wanna hear all your stories. Have a nice day and God bless ^-^

My mom always says, those who derail from jama'at can never have any peace of their minds, they'll keep suffering one way or another because they have left Allah's jama'at. If you have left ahmadiyyat, for whichever reason, how are you doing - mentally, physically and financially? TIA

(I do have a bomb af story of my own, maybe I'll share it when the time is right)

So here is KM4 in 1986 mentioning how it was the 1857 rebellion which caused an end to Muslim governance in India which is categorically an ahistorical claim but KM4 is defiantly stubborn on this https://streamable.com/yp6fju

source

To the point he omits mentioning how the Mughal empire was a puppet of the British East India company two rulers before Bahadur Shah Zafar