There’s a guy I’ve been live chatting with everyday since early November— we are half way across the world from each other. I have a love letter I’m waiting to share with him, but I’m nervous.

He sleeps through the sun where he is at, and I stay up till 3am on average with him on live video.

Is a month enough time to share my love towards him?

i know im not going crazy because when he sent me a Screenshot of my message i sent to him it said "[his username] then my message...

and i figured out that people who are logged into more than one instagram account have this notification unlike people who are logged into one account the notification will only show up as the message. they wont see their username before the message.

ive asked him whats your other instagram but he keeps lying saying 'i dont have one'
i just know hes lying cus he also lied about having whatsapp (he wont give me his number) again i saw a screenshot of whatsapp when he was showing me something on his phone... i called him out for it. i said you do have whatsapp and he was like yeah fine so i do lol

im getting really sus cus his current instagram i have him on doesnt have many girls on... im thinking maybe his other one does.???

does anyone one on here know how to find another Instagram account linked to a person phone?

Hi guys, like my title says I'm 18f and 19m in a LDR relationship since August and we met online (on insta). I honestly don't know how it happened, but it did. I live in the East coast and he lives in the BC province so its definitely been interesting.

I have some experience dating someone who lives far, though not exactly in this kind of situation, and he doesn't, so I warned him when we started talking more seriously, because it was also why the last one ended and I really didn't want to do it again. But he's always told me that I'm the only one he wants, yadda yadda whatever so I let it go. And its been great. And I know thats how it is in the beginning, because you don't think about the distance just how much you like that person, but with him it feels/felt different in how he treated me. But recently he's been acting a little different, Just more distant, not calling me first, little stuff but I didn't say anything about it. Then today I joked about" if we broke up___ " then he said "when" as a joke. Usually this wouldn't bother me, but a little later, he asked me how "long I think we'll last," and it turned into a whole conversation about my going to college, him second year of uni, "sunken cost fallacy" (his words), how hard it'll be seeing each other for a couple days then going months without, how he shows love physically, sex drive shit, our past relationship experiences, if we would stay friends if we break up, etc.

It was a mature conversation, if not clinical, and we agreed we'd keep talking about it more. I know its important to have this kind of dialogue and its normal to have doubts and that it doesn't mean that this will turn out how my ex did me. And. part of it is probably just because we were supposed to see each other this week during Thanksgiving break , but personal stuff got in the way. But I feel hurt for some reason. I put up so many walls to protect myself from getting too attached and distanced myself emotionally but he always stayed true to the fact we'd make it work. We already broke up once, when he was doing bad mentally and needed to go on a "self improvement arc," which only lasted for two days because he missed me so bad. But now its like he's weighing the pros and cons. I genuinely have never felt like this about someone, in person or not. Now I finally allowed myself to put some walls down it feels as if he's not sure that he wants to put in the effort to be with me. And I can't help but think that if I had just allowed myself to put more into the relationship from the beginning he wouldn't be feeling this way now. I know its realistic especially because we're still young, and we shouldn't let our emotions cloud our judgement, no matter how strong but I just wanted to hear your takes because I can't really talk to anyone in real life about this.

My partner has OCD and used to live 2 hours ahead. He occasionally got into cyclical patterns of doubting my loyalty which is typical for the OCD he has. We haven't been together long but he recently moved 8 hours out. He's f@cked off that I won't get married to him but we're different cultures and in his culture, religious marriage isn't the same as the ceremony. So recently he told me he has sleeping problems and I let it slide that he won't contact me for 2 days at a time. I also don't expect him to pay for anything especially as he is going to pay for my flights but now I'm angry. 2 days - no contact but active on social media. I went to dinner the other night and he said he'd pay for half. He has more than enough to pay, but he forgot. I try to buy him stuff. He won't let me. I try to call him - he isn't free. I go to work, and even though he f@cks off to uni all day and visits family, he's annoyed when I'm at work for 2 days. He is like a petulant child. I know he wants sex and is pissed off at the time difference but part of me says that he doesn't really know me and is just desperate to be in a relationship like his brother. What do I do?

I don’t think he loves me anymore. I’ve asked him a bunch of times, and he says he does, but his actions are all over the place. I’m so confused and just don’t know what to believe. It’s draining me, and I feel sad all the time.

Why does it seem like this is becoming a trend? I’m not saying all relationships are like this, but many seem to start off as sweet, loving, and full of attention, time, and effort from both partners. However, after a few months or years together, one partner suddenly changes.

What’s worse is when someone’s feelings change, but they don’t communicate it. Why can’t they just be honest and tell the other person how they feel instead of pretending they’re still in love? It’s unfair to make someone believe in something that’s no longer true.

Why do people enter relationships, especially long-distance ones, if they’re not ready? Being in a long-distance relationship should come with an understanding that communication and extra effort are not just important—they’re essential. Just why?

Hey y’all, I (M20) would like my girlfriend F20 and I to be able to communicate better. We dated 2 years before we started long distance. We suck at communication. Well, to be honest, she sucks at it more than me. I mostly just want us to communicate to eachother when we’re going somewhere, when we’re with friends and when we’re busy. That’s about it, I do it most of the time, and she does it sometimes, but often I have to remind her/ask her too, and when I do that, she says I’m up her ass, or being annoying. How can her and I figure out communication that better works for both of us?

my partner and i were recently lucky enough to spend 2 whole weeks together, and it was wonderful! but two weeks was the longest we had ever spent together in person, so it was also the hardest "see you later" since we started dating.

Because of how hard it was, i decided to buy something that my partner and i have been wanting for the past three years, LDR touch bracelets!

we got the totwoo brand bracelets, and while they aren't perfect, we both love them so much. we've only had the bracelets for two weeks and we've already sent each other hundreds of taps 😭

obviously the bracelets aren't as good as having him by my side, but feeling the bracelet vibrate throughout the day helps me feel like i'm not alone 🥰🥰🥰

the bracelets were kind of pricey, but its one of the best purchases i've ever made!

So we are doing long distance, before meeting fst time we did face time for a month, the day I met him in person, I don’t find him attractive. Since I am already 34, very stressed of being single, I thought this is my last chance, made up my mind , met him again next day, I felt okayish.

After a month, I met him again , it was good meeting, I was sexually attracted to him.

Then again after a month, he came to meet me, all of a sudden I felt turn off and he tried to intimate and I repelled .

One of the reasons I analysed is he has a square shape face with not so attractive facial features, whenever I see him closely I don’t like his face but somewhat get used to it whenever I spend days with him. So on the last day when he was leaving for his home, I felt good because every day he looks different kind of may be because of his beard hide his square shape face sometimes. So over all I am confused whether I am sexually attracted to him or not. Any comments?

We have been in a long distance relationship for 7months now (together for almost 1.5years). Long distance was pretty rough in the beginning (we were going through a rocky phase at that time regardless of the distance), we did breakup for a month but got back together and things have been great since then. We have no complaints, we have worked our way through most issues even the distance isn’t bothering us now.

Idk but for the last week or two my bf has been a little distant though he does make time for me, facetimes regularly and I have no real problems except that he feels slightly distant (not his usual self?). He has a lot on his plate right now with respect to his career so i understand that and i have only tried to be supportive and have not raised this issue with him.

I did ask him a few days ago if everything was fine and that he seemed different but he just brushed it aside saying he is just slightly busier than usual and there is nothing to worry about. The thing is 8-9 months back out relationship went through its worst phase and he became distant and cold then and i worry that he might become like that again even though he says we have worked out way through that phase and it wont happen again.

We have been no contact for over a day over a fight now. Its not even serious enough to be a fight, and definitely not out first disagreement but the stupidest by far. I’ve been a bit busy with my university exams so our schedules have been out of sync for the last few days so we’ve been talking alot less than usual (we talk alot through the day texting, calls, facetime). He called me up in the evening and i said that I’m a bit busy i would call him back later as I only have 10 minutes to spare rn. He said he couldn’t talk later (he had a family thing) so let’s talk right now he would hangup in 10 anyways. I was in a rush so i offhandedly told him to hangup right then we can just facetime before sleeping, I didn’t realise he was mad about this until a few hours later. I apologised, he ranted for a bit and slept. He told me he would talk me in the morning after cooling off.

Things went back to normal the next day, we talked and I even apologised. Later that day we were on our nightly facetime call and he was high strung about his football team losing. I consoled him but teased him a bit after and he just abruptly cut the call. I called him back immediately he just told me to fuck off and has been no contact since then. I was irritated that night so I slept but I’ve tried calling him a few times the next day and he isn’t responding. I am extremely confused, teasing is very normal to us though i admit i maybe shouldn’t have teased him about his football team losing. But this seems so childish and stupid, we have had far serious disagreements that we have talked through. He has never goes no contact after a fight for more than a few hours.

I am angry, sad and confused. What should I do? Is it only about me teasing or is there a bigger problem underway.

I’m 22F and have been with my boyfriend (24M) for a little over 1.5 years. We’re in a long-distance relationship and usually try to meet every month or two for a week. He’s the most calm, intelligent, practical, and understanding person I know, and in many ways, he’s the perfect person.

Lately, though, I’ve been overthinking about ending things. I can’t figure out if it’s my tendency to self sabotage or if there’s something deeper going on. We’ve both been really busy the past week, and December looks the same. Our communication has dropped, and we haven’t seen each other since September - the longest we’ve been apart. I understand why things are the way they are, so I don’t blame him, but it’s still hard.

One recurring issue for me is the lack of expression. After 1.5 years, I feel like we should have a deeper emotional bond, especially in a long distance relationship where communication is everything. He does not express unless I pester him. And even then, it's not him opening up emotionally or expressing love towards me - it is more explaining why he isn't expressive. He never says "I love you". When I brought it up, he explained that he’s never been expressive and that I should focus on his actions, like making the effort to visit me. I’ve tried to make peace with this, and I know he cares, but it still bothers me. It feels like I am constantly digging for something that should come more naturally, from both of us. I understand him, but to what extent do I keep understanding? Over time, I have stopped expressing my love as well, because it feels strange when it's not being reciprocated.

Another concern is our future. When I have tried discussing it, his response is that we can't predict what will happen in the next few years, so it's better to not focus on it now. I have expressed my fear of him ending things if his parents don’t approve, he reminds me that he’s a human with feelings too. He says it would hurt him just as much if we broke up. He’s fully invested in the relationship now and plans to try to convince his parents when the time comes, but he’s clear that the final decision will lie with them. But the uncertainty of "what if" worries me - what if I invest in this relationship, only to be told it cannot happen?

The loneliness is terrible, to be honest. I always try to distract myself with studies, work, or going out with friends, but at the end of the day, these thoughts creep in. When I’m with him, I’m at peace - genuinely the happiest person ever. But that’s only for 5-6 days every month or two. The rest of the time, I’m stuck with these overwhelming thoughts.

I’ve always dreamed of a passionate relationship where I’d be showered with loud, expressive love. That’s how it’s been since my childhood as my parents are so vocally loud in their love, it’s almost overwhelming. So, I grew up expecting my relationship would be the same. But this relationship is so calm and slow that it worries me. Am I actually getting all that I deserve? Romantic gestures are almost non-existent.

Don’t get me wrong, my boyfriend is truly perfect in so many ways. I just need advice on how we can make things better for me, as he claims to be perfectly fine with how things are. How do I find balance without feeling like I’m asking for too much?

TL;DR: I’m in a 1.5-year-long LDR with my boyfriend, and while he’s calm, understanding, and perfect in many ways, I’m struggling with the lack of emotional expression. He rarely opens up or expresses love unless I push him, and even then, it’s more about explaining why he isn’t expressive rather than sharing his feelings for me. I’ve stopped expressing myself as well, and it feels strange to be the only one doing it. I’m worried I’m not getting the emotional connection I deserve, and I don’t know if this is self-sabotage or if my concerns are valid. Any advice on how to navigate this would be helpful.

i (26F) met my person (29M) almost 15 years ago... yes, i know. we finally met IRL in April of 2021. he is looking to relocate to my hometown, within the next year to year-and-a-half. given this, we are both a bit worried about having enough funds to make this happen without it putting either one of us in a financial bind, which is why we are choosing to wait. i'd like advice on any of you guys that have moved for your significant others. the financials, challenges, things you wish you knew, etc.. we both currently live in the states-he is in the midwest, moving to the east coast, for reference. any help is greatly appreciated, and i appreciate any time put into this post. thank you in advance.

So my LDP got me 40 cans of Dr Pepper for Christmas, I like Dr Pepper and it’s become a joke between us that I am obsessed with Dr Pepper.

For Christmas I got her a range of things that she likes, Harry Potter legos, a brand of crisps she likes that are only available in the UK, some poetry books that she’s been wanting, and some other bits and bobs.

All she got me was Dr Pepper.. am I being ungrateful when I am slightly disappointed by this? I just feel like I put so much time effort and thought into her gifts and I got this..

I feel guilty because she seems upset that one of my first thoughts was oh where am I going to put all of this? I obviously said thank you and said I loved it so she didn’t feel bad but I can tell I just wasn’t as excited and she wanted me to be, the first present I opened of Dr Pepper I was like oh nice! This is the flavour I really enjoyed when I tried it, but then I opened the second one and it was just more Dr Pepper.

So am I being ungrateful? I just really need some outside perspective on this

My (24M) GF (21F) period is comimg rn. When she's extremely angry she tells me straight away that its her time of the month. She has irregular periods, her last one was in September which was an awful time for me.

During that time I was in calls with her every single day during it for support, I sacrificed my work to stay up all night with her, we'd talk and we'd even do her favorite hobby together but instead she'd get angry as much possible, starting arguments for the sake of it and blaming me for every little thing that's gone wrong for her. She blamed me for coming home late from a family dinner even though I'm 10k kilometers away last time around 😭

Just need some advice for guys here on what do you do when your SO's are on their periods and whats your support mechanism with her? I really don't want a repeat of last time, so either I support her because I'm off to see her in 14 days time or should I leave her alone for the next few days still contacting her on how she's doing!

Thanks!

i’ve (f24) been dating my boyfriend for two years. we’re in a middle-distance relationship and usually see each other two weekends a month. if i have more free days at work, i visit him more often. recently, i moved back to my university city because i got a job here, but all of my friends live elsewhere.

i feel like my boyfriend is my only close friend, as he is the only person i talk to every day. i don’t really have anyone else to chat with, and i find this a bit concerning and upsetting. he’s also the only person i go out with when we see each other. while i’ll always share everything with him, i wish i had someone else to talk to on a daily basis. it just feels very lonely sometimes especially when i can't even see him everyday. ☹️

So it's been a month since my(F31) boyfriend(M32) and I have broken up. We meet at our country and had the best 3,4 months of our lives but he had to move to another country and the plan was for him to move back 8 months later. Our connection and relationship was healthy and we were a good match. Even apart I surprised him for his birthday that blew his mind. I loved him so much and I thought he did too. He did act like it. And for the most part I believe he did and he was genuine.

A month ago he broke up with me out ot the blue saying you have no plan to come here ( Im too broke to go ) and I am about to get a promotion probably in a month which means I can't come home as we planned. This is going nowhere(seems logical but I just know he's being completely honest and I feel like there's someone else).We didn't fight at all. To be honest he was expecting me to say something to change his mind but I was very calm and quiet. When he finished his little speech I said alright then ( I was crying inside but I didn't want to beg or even show how much it broke me ). He said don't you want to say anything? I said at this point no because when someone doesn't want to be with me then they won't no matter what I say or do. Do you want me to beg? I would never do that it's your choice and all I can say is that I hope you're being honest with me.he said this is so weird he was freaking out! Then he ask are you gonna block me on everything now? I always had the worst breakups (which broke my heart again cuz it made me feel like he was only thinking about himself and not me at all) I said I don't even care about that we said goodbye and then we hung up.

I was completely broken and I was crying for a week! I can't get out of the bed, I can't eat, I can't do my job. All I do is force myself to work out.

But seeing him being happy and hanging out with his friends and new girls two days after the breakup makes me so depressed. He clearly stopped loving me way before the breakup he just waited till my birthday to give me a gift so that we would be even.

I have so many questions for him even though I know even if he answers them nothing changes.

I just hate myself for being so weak and can't get my shit together. He clearly doesn't give a shit why am I? I even hate myself for the fact that deep down Im waiting for him to reach out despite the fact that I know we shouldn't and it's not right.

I just wanna move on and forget about it but I can't find a way. The thought of staying in this mood for a long time freaks me out, him having all the fun gives me anxiety. The slightest possibility of him talking bad about me gives me anxiety even though I wasn't bad in anyway and I tried by best to give him love and support even when we were fighting. To think that for how long he lost interest and was just pretending makes me wanna cry.

Please I need some advice. I know all the things that I should or shouldn't think about or do/don't on paper but for some reason Im not able to do so 😞

My (32F) boyfriend (40M) is finally on his way to me -- permanently!! It's about a 30 hour drive with breaks, so I will see him late tomorrow/early Tuesday morning!!! After a year of long distance, I'm so happy we are successfully closing the gap ♥️ We met 14 years ago, and have been friends from the beginning. I'm so excited to be doing this life with my best friend 🥰

This may be a long post so I apologize in advance. My boyfriend (27M) and I (33F) have been together for over 8 months and in that time I’ve started seeing an alarming number of red flags that have started making me feel very uncomfortable and have led me to want to break up with him, I just don’t know how.

• I have children from my previous marriage, and he seems to be becoming more jealous of me spending time with them. If I take any of my children out to the park, to school, to the mall, etc., he starts replying coldly to me, making comments about how I was “gone for a long time,” or “why couldn’t have called him while I was with them?”

• He’s shown some serious jealousy and controlling behavior over my followers on social media, keeping track of any new followers I gain. Just recently, he got upset over a story I posted on Instagram and told me to “go enjoy spending time with my followers, you gained quite a few new ones in a day.” I’m an artist, and always see an increase in new people whenever I post artwork online, but I don’t interact with any of them on a personal level.

• Just a few days ago, he became really upset over my trans best friend of 24 years commenting on any of my posts. My friend will usually say “love you girl!” and add heart emojis. It has always been strictly platonic and my boyfriend knows this, and has repeatedly told me he’s fine with it until suddenly he wasn’t.

• He has anger issues that he doesn’t seem to be able to control even though I’ve told him repeatedly that they bother me and trigger my PTSD from an extremely abusive relationship in the past. He becomes so angry over little things (like losing a lighter or his dog jumping on him, for example) and will yell, sometimes going so far as to throw things. He’s also punched walls in the past (before we met) which is the same thing my ex used to do and really upsets me.

• Lovebombing after any sort of argument or disagreement, which makes me feel like I’m in the wrong for overreacting.

• I feel like he guilt trips me constantly, telling me how sad he is and moping if I don’t send him pictures first thing in the morning, or throughout the day, or if I don’t reply to a message within a certain amount of time.

There are so many more but these are the main ones I’ve noticed and have tried to discuss but it seems to be brushed off.

My biggest concern is that he has some pretty severe undiagnosed mental issues and I worry about his own safety if I try to end things with him. He has told me constantly that he has nothing except me, that he lives for me, and that I’m the only thing that makes him want to wake up each day. In my past relationship, my ex attempted suicide in front of me after I said I wanted to leave, so I have an overwhelming fear of something similar happening in this case. The only safety I feel I have in this situation is the distance (EU to US).

If anyone has any kind advice on how to approach this, I would be so grateful.

TL;DR - Boyfriend showing clear signs of abusive behavior. Not sure how to break up with him.

I've never been with something before who made me feel so appreciated

She broke up with me via text message after all promises and plans we had for the future. It's like she just deleted me from her life in a single moment. All those months and things we did in person just to end like this. I'm destroyed.

I posted here earlier in the week to say my boyfriend broke up with me.

It’s been an extremely exhausting week. I took a few days off work to be sad and i’ve been trying to distract myself with things I enjoy to keep me thinking about him. But it is hard. I’ve gone no contact but there is so much i want to say to him. I know that’s not healthy of either of us, we need our space to grieve and heal. I just wish i could hear his voice and see his face one last time.

Tonight i will allow myself to be sad. I haven’t cried for a few days, but i need to tonight. Long distance is hard and if he didn’t have to move back to his home country, then i think this relationship would’ve ended differently:(

Missing somebody and not able to talk to them is the worst feeling ever!

Me and my long distance boyfriend have been together for almost 5 months now it was a great relationship at the start but now he’s changed so much today I was trying to talk to him and he said it wasn’t worth his time I don’t know if I did something wrong but I love him with all my heart and I honestly am thinking about breaking up with him because I have a lot of mental health issues and he isn’t helping when I’m constantly worrying he’s gonna cheat or leave me so I don’t know what I should do because it’s going to kill me to break up with him but he barely even talks to me

Hey. I'm just curious what was everyone's experience like and where they bumped into the one worth pursuing?

My long distance girlfriend (F22) and I (M23) have been together for a little over three years now. I live on the east coast, she lives in the midwest but goes to college on the west coast. We were never not long distance, but we were always up for the challenge. Unfortunately, 2024 has been a rocky year for this relationship. It's the year she finished undergrad and as she was doing so, she was feeling a lot of pressure and anxiety. She knew she wasn't gonna being seeing her friends again, she was going to be living all by herself in a new state for grad school, her life was going to be going through a stressful transition. Throughout this anxiety, she decided to break up with me (this was around April), saying she still loved me but didn't think there was room in her life to share a commitment like this with someone else. I was heartbroken, but I respected her wishes. What hurt the most was that she didn't really talk to me about these insecurities much and kept them to herself. 24 hours after the break up, she texted me saying she missed me. I probably shouldn't have responded, but what else can you do when you love someone? We talked for a bit and actually had a really good conversation about how she was feeling, probably a conversation we should've had before she decided to break up, because the following day, she's asking to get back together and of course I agreed. While I'm happy to be back with her, things haven't been the same, which was to be expected. What I learned from the experience was that I needed to lower the amount of expectations set on the relationship to help not add to the pressure of what she was facing in her own life. I tried to keep my insecurities separate from the relationship and deal with them on my own (i.e. going to therapy) However, this is a long distance relationship after all and so somethings are just impossible to not want to share with her. Every time I try, she says something like "I don't want to talk about that right now" and brushes it off. I can tell that it's not because she doesn't care about those things, rather it's because she actually does, but she's under too much pressure and stress as is and she just wants to be able to keep it together to get through what's in front of her as she is VERY uncomfortable with uncertainty. I get that because I feel the exact same way, it's why I'm under pressure right now too. But while I'm doing my very best to work on my insecurities by going to therapy/working on them myself and by putting more considerate towards what she's going through and incorporating that into our plans when we interact/when we see each other, I don't think she's doing the same. I remember when I told her I was going to therapy and we talked about her maybe doing the same (not just to better our relationship, but to better our life situations), at first she agreed, but gave up after not even a month because she just doesn't like to admit she needs something like that. I, as the boyfriend, can't argue with her like that, but where do I go from here? She's clearly facing a lot of anxiety and stress and pressure being alone at school, working her tail off to the point where she can't breathe, with her family, friends, and me out of sight, and she does nothing to help it and it's affecting our relationship because it's like neither of us are as comfortable with each other as we used to be. I want to get back to that, but I don't know how. I feel like she's getting used to this which I don't want because it's unfair to me if I spend the rest of my life as the one who's probably doing more for this relationship than she is, but at the same time I don't want to add pressure or expectations for her on her end. I love her enough to seek advice on how to deal with this.

TL;DR: My (M23) long-distance girlfriend (F22) of 3+ years broke up with me earlier this year during a stressful transition in her life. She asked to get back together 48 hours later after we finally had an open conversation about her feelings. Since then, our relationship feels strained. While I’m working on my own insecurities through therapy, she doesn't take any sort of similar initiative on herself. I want to support her through her anxiety and reconnect like we used to, but I feel stuck. How can I encourage her to address her stress while keeping our relationship strong and not making it seem like I'm undoing all of the progress she's done by burning herself out?

(If you only read the TL;DR version, I'd recommend reading the full post before giving me advice, I don't want the response to be as simple as "talk to her" or "break up with her" without taking into consideration why I don't see it as simple as that. If I did, I wouldn't be here right now)

2 more weeks and he’s leaving 😭😭😭 after being together for 5 months he’s going back to his hometown and this will be the hardest goodbye. So hard that ive been crying mySELF TO SLEEP AS EARLY AS NOW ! How do u be happy and live in the moment in these last weeks if you suddenly feel waves of sadness because u know ull be ldr again 😭 dammnnnnnnn