An unemployed single parent on welfare with a fantasy novel no one wants to read. Yet!

• Shut up and read

• Shut up and write

• By eliminating every book, your unfinished novel becomes the best narrative on earth by default, despite your writer's block. Just shut up and burn books.

I’m a hi-scool sophomore and I finished this book as of yesterday. To anyone who has read this book, you know that once you finish reading, the book doesn’t just end (don’t ask me what I mean by this because I don’t even know myself). There is some beauty in Salinger’s prose through this book. This book is so uniquely words and just so refreshing. By the end of the book Salinger to me is just a publisher, this book is Holden. You could say it has me in a choke-holden. That’s why you can’t take away Catcher and the Rye. It is disturbing, it is painful, it is HORNY, it is reality. It is so horny. I’m horny. Very very horny. #Horny4Holden. Blah blah blah lots of other words. The end. Horny.

I finally picked a book up a few months ago, basically for the first time since high school and I’ve been consuming them voraciously since. I’m so full tbh. Almost 10 books in two months, granted they’re romance novels, so pretty quick, light reads. I’ve been so obsessed with reading that I haven’t written in a couple months.

If I’m supposed to “just write” when do I read? If I have to read to become a better writer, when do I write? You guys gotta fuckin pick one, I don’t have time for both.

And no, I will not set time aside to do both, I just want this problem solved for me.

This topic has been on my mind since yesterday, while I was writing a short story. I decided that my main character should have an IQ of 150-160 for reasons that most definitely do not include wish fulfillment. Then it hit me, I have no idea how someone with an IQ of 150-160 thinks, feels, views the world, or processes emotions (if they do any of that stuff at all). And despite my own massive intellect, we might as well be different species.

When an event occurs that requires the main character’s reaction, how could I possibly write how they’d respond? If I could, wouldn’t I have an IQ of 150-160 myself? It’s a paradox. It’s like an orangutan trying to figure out how a human would act in a situation. I gave up on the story.

It’s the same as humans trying to predict how a vastly more intelligent alien species would treat us if they came to Earth. Would they see us as pests to be eradicated so they could colonize Earth properly? Or would they find us cute and decide to make us their pets?

Would they sell neutered Norwegian humans in alien pet shops, with alien girls saying, “Aww, look how blue his eyes are! His platinum-blonde fur is adorable!”? Would they market East Asian people as scentless alternatives? Would the dumber aliens think black humans bring bad luck? And let’s face it, the Indians are probably goners in either scenario.

We’ll never know.

I don’t CARE if it puts writers out of work! It makes writing so much easier! I don’t even have to THINK, I just make the machine think for me!!!

BRING ON THE AI TAKEOVER! SCREW HUMAN WRITERS 🤖🗣️💯🔥🔥🤖🤖🔥💯💯🤖🤖🗣️🔥💯🤖🤖

I was engaging in my favorite pastime of giving unsolicited writing advice to other authors when the subject of writing technique came up. Specifically, what we use for our writing. Of course, I explained that I greatly enjoy writing my works in the Reddit Text Editor and was detailing the various benefits (such as it being free and having a copy paste feature) when one of the lesser authors interrupted me and said that I should make the switch to Ms. Word.

Apparently, she can check grammar and spelling and other such menial tasks. She is also capable of taking dictation, which is a wonderous boon. As we all know, real authors don't write, but dictating isn't technically writing. Unfortunately, before the author that was telling me of Ms. Word could give me her contact information, his mother summoned him for dinner. Since I am a mentor to this author (and to many other authors, for that matter), it would be awkward for me to admit ignorance by asking for this information rather than having it offered to me in an unsolicited manner, as is tradition.

Before you ask, yes, I did try to find this information on my own. However, when I google "Miss Word" all I get is results for "Miss World", who appears to be a model rather than a writing assistant. Googling "ms word" results in spam from Microsoft. Please help me.

From one author to another, thank you for your aid.

After a considerable amount of research, I am about to embark on another quest to find the lost books of Wattpad. My studies have led me to believe that the location might be somewhere in the Middle East. However I won't be able to determine the exact location until I access the smut collection at the Bodleian Library at Oxford. I'm a distinguished professor with a reputation dealing with antiquities and ancient civilizations and my credentials won't be questioned but I obviously can't just walk in and ask to see their smut collection. So, what should I say I'm looking for?

I was writing a book and, at this point in the story, my main character has to make the hard decision to kill her son. It’s for plot purposes and it will affect her mental state as well as the people around her greatly for the next few pages until I forget that it happened and go back to writing more sex scenes.

Coincidentally, I have a wife and a son of my own. I love them both dearly and would give up anything for them. However, I need to keep the plot as realistic as possible, and none of my siblings have any children (and I don’t have friends). Because of this, I have been strongly considering killing my son for the past few days so that my plot can truly be realistic.

What do you think? Should I kill my son?

I am a fraud!! My book was rewritten by ai cuz of my leaning disorder and people everywhere trashed it when i made this transparent so i will never right down another fantasy. Im sorry i thought i could share my story with you⛈️⛈️⛈️ ps this really really hurts…

Verbatim salsa 🌶️

Here's a synopsis:

This tale follows the story of three busty anthropologists: Holly Smith, Cassie Flynn, and Stacy Tanaka. Their lives are largely defined by their big boobs, for better or for worse. On one hand, it gets them attention from both men and women. It often gives them favors and preferential treatment. On the other hand, no matter how smart and accomplished they are as anthropologists, some people just can't take them seriously because of their big boobs. Of the three women, Holly wholeheartedly embraces her big boobs. They are a huge source of pride for her and she loves to flaunt them and use them to her advantage. She likes being objectified and doesn't mind not being taken seriously every now and then. Holly is a tall, blue-eyed blonde with long legs, slim waist, and large, natural breasts adorned with lovely pink nipples. Stacy is in the middle regarding loving or hating her big boobs. She largely enjoys the attention, but sometimes resents not being taken seriously and the objectification she receives from others. She is also often subjected to extreme envy by her flat-chested mother, who often seethes at not having big breasts like her daughter and often questions whether she is actually her daughter. Stacy is of East Asian descent with light brown skin, slim waist, and large, natural breasts adorned with lovely brown nipples. Cassie hates having big boobs. As a feminist, she hates being objectified and receiving attention for her big tits, often seething with anger when people give them attention. She hates not being taken seriously and being reduced to her chest. But keep in mind that a large part of this has to do with her public persona revolving around being a feminist. Sometimes, she secretly enjoys the attention, but has to pretend to hate it to keep up her feminist shtick. Cassie is a fiery redhead with freckles, green eyes, pale skin, slim waist, and large, natural breasts adorned with lovely pink nipples.

One day, while out on sea, they unexpectedly find themselves stranded on a remote island after their ship capsizes. But this is no ordinary island - it is home to a tribe that has been completely cut off from the rest of humanity since the dawn of time. Trespassing on this island is strictly forbidden, so not much is known about this tribe. The three women have read extensively about this isolated island, and immediately recognize it when they first become stranded. They know that the tribe is completely isolated and have been violently hostile to the few outsiders who have trespassed on their land, so they are scared. But they are also curious to discover the secrets of this isolated tribe the rest of humanity knows virtually nothing about. At first, they assume that the tribespeople will be shocked by seeing things like white skin, blonde/red hair, cell phones, watches, cameras, and stuff like that for the first time. But no. When the tribespeople lay eyes on the three women for the first time, something else unexpected immediately garners all of their attention. You see, the island's population is predominantly female, but due to centuries of isolation, they possess a genetic mutation that renders them all flat-chested. So when the tribe first laid eyes on Holly and Stacy and Cassie’s generously large boobs, they were mesmerized by these magical orbs on their chests. The tribespeople have never seen boobs before, and they begin to worship Holly, Stacy, and Cassie as goddesses. However, this admiration is also laced with envy for what the tribe sees as unattainable physical perfection. The island's male members and lesbian/bisexual women abandon their partners in droves, enticed by the idea of being part of a harem with these blessed goddesses. This leaves much of the island with violent envy towards the three women. A mix of worship and jealousy fills their eyes as they gaze upon Holly and Stacy and Cassie, now thrust into a surreal role as goddesses among a primal society.

Eventually, the presence of the three anthropologists sparks a full-blown civil war amongst the tribespeople. Amidst all this chaos, Cassie develops a complicated relationship with a tribeswoman named Lyra. Although most of the tribespeople are deeply infatuated with all three of the anthropologists, Lyra's infatuation with Cassie seems to be the strongest, surpassing the others' infatuations towards any of the other anthropologists. Lyra can’t keep her eyes and hands of Cassie, constantly admiring and worshipping her and her breasts. Throughout their time on the island, Cassie responds with deep hostility towards Lyra, expressing disgust, contempt, and extreme anger towards Lyra’s behavior, but these reactions only further embolden Lyra. But Cassie secretly finds Lyra cute and likes the attention she receives from her.

Eventually, after much turmoil, a helicopter arrives to rescue the women. As they board the helicopter and leave the island behind, the devastation below them—an island at war—haunts them. Cassie, in particular, feels a wave of regret when she sees Lyra crying as the helicopter ascends into the sky. The realization hits Cassie hard: she had let her feminist identity blind her to the truth of her feelings. She had enjoyed the attention, the adoration, and even the worship. But it’s too late—Lyra is left behind, the war continues to rage, and the three women return to their normal lives, forever changed by what they experienced.

Back in civilization, the women find themselves unable to move on from their experience. Despite being explicitly forbidden from returning to the island due to its protected status, the three anthropologists decide to defy the rules. They are driven by a shared desire to bring peace to the tribe and to rectify the chaos their presence had caused. Months of meticulous research lead them to develop a chemical mixture capable of naturally enhancing breast size. With their plan in place, Stacy, a licensed pilot, steals the keys to the university’s helicopter, and the trio makes their daring return to the forbidden island.

The tribespeople, still embroiled in their civil war, are stunned by the return of the anthropologists. With their new chemical in hand, the women distribute it to the women of the tribe, and as their flat chests begin to swell and transform into full, voluptuous breasts, a sense of joy and harmony spreads across the island. Peace is restored, and the women, once again revered as goddesses, now hold the key to the tribe’s future.

For Cassie and Lyra, the reunion is transformative. Cassie finally allows herself to embrace her feelings, confessing her love for Lyra and abandoning the walls she had built around her heart. The two become a couple, their bond solidified as they navigate a newfound sense of honesty and intimacy.

Before departing the island, the three women also decide to take Lyra with them, despite the challenges of integrating her into modern society. Over the following years, they teach Lyra to speak English, helping her bridge the gap between her old life and her new one. Though Lyra now lives with Cassie in the modern world, she remains connected to her loved ones on the island, maintaining regular communication through cell phones the three anthropologists gifted the tribespeople before leaving.

Eventually, Lyra and Cassie marry, their love deepened by the journey they’ve shared. Lyra’s unwavering devotion to Cassie—and to her ample chest—becomes a defining part of their relationship. Amazingly, even several years later, Lyra remains as infatuated with Cassie's breasts as she was when she first laid eyes on them.The saying among friends becomes, “Whenever Lyra’s hands aren’t on her phone or keyboard, they’re on Cassie’s tits,” and Cassie wouldn't have it any other way.

Oh wait, the random penguins in the house say I can't expose my secrets. I'm under an NDA. (No Dookie Agreement)

Sorry! 🤷‍♀️

What do you do to stop yourself? Do you stop yourself? I can't stop myself. I want to stop myself. I need to stop myself. I'm only a month in, but going another 4 or 5 months without getting opinions is gonna be rough. How can I stop myself? How would you go about not asking people for opinions? Should I stop asking people for opinions? Can I stop asking people for opinions? What's your opinion?

Just finished Neil Gaiman's Sandman series-- WOW! How did I not hear about this sooner?! It's given me a lot of inspiration for my future supernatural fantasy romance trilogy (which will have a 750K+ word count, not to brag 😏).

I know Gaiman's allegedly a monster, but we're all old enough here to separate gossip and legal accusations from the talented, incredible, and freaky artists they're volleyed at, right? I believe this community is mature enough to give predatory old men the benefit of the doubt. So, who is your favorite sex pest author? And which book of theirs should I read next in preparation for my (eventual) writing? Also, do I have to apply for the Pulitzer or will they just give it to me as soon as I self-publish on Amazon?

I mean wait no I'm totally a human person. Check out my profile pic of a cartoon human face with glasses so you know I'm real.

Anyway, since I'm a marketing bot I mean a super real human person I have a questions specifically for you genius successful writers hanging out on Reddit.

How old are you? How old were you when you published? And Also a bonus: what is your mother's maiden name and your SS number?

Try to answer the questions in that order so I can scan I mean read the information clearly. I also have planned to respond to all of you with perfect grammar and lots of exclamation points.‼️

That is all…

OK so the story is based around this young guy called Juan and he has a bitchy girlfriend who will NOT sexually please him unless she had a good day.

The story is basically just about how immoral it is to deny a man sex within a loving relationship and how she should dip over and bend it for him and take one for the team.

What are your thoughts on character development being tied into orgasms?

Also, do you think he should dump her and go on Tinder or bully her for being frigid?

Hello fellow human fams. Finna write a manuscript and I was wondering how you go about writing humans realistically in your terrestrial novels. I read many tomes but still don’t seem to grasp the ☌⌰⎍☊☍⋉⌇⟒⌰⋉ of it all and my writing is cheugy at best. Iykyk.

The tough row I’m hoeing is how we humans aren’t able to put their index at the fourth purple dimension. To me, it’s just a logical direction to point my seventh ⊑⟒⌿⋉⏃⏚⟒☊☌ at, like any other human would. How come we can point at any three dimensional object but left in the dust beyond? Aren’t the other dimensions simply just… there? And why don’t most of us make use of our hyperpinea-ellipsoid eye?

I also fret that my young age of eight myria-annum might prevent me to slay in the publishing industry. How ripe were you when you published your first document?

Mind’s mush. Show me da wae and treat this fellow human here with kid gloves. I wish to ascertain more about our intricate culture and digital penmanship.

Pardon my French girls but if my answers are a teensy-weensy sluggish, it’s by virtue of my manifold hecatonicosachoronical modem that’s highkey busted no cap.

May your prolate ovaloid throng ritzy. Skrrt.

Should I throw out all of this month's writing, even though it took a year of planning? Does it count if I put 10 words toward a new project (if so, any ideas)? Maybe journaling?

It's not much, and considering my font size is 72 and the paper size A5 (14.8cm x 21.0cm)

but Im still proud of myself ;-;

I have two major regrets in life. One is I didn't write enough, and the other is that it's all my fault.

Hopefully in the afterlife I will waste less time building impressive twitter and youtube audiences.

Do you think the interns will help transcribe my book when I'm in hospice? Maybe I could squeeze one out before I kick the bucket.

i just want to share this with all of you. ive achieved my greatest dream. my ya dark romance spicy booktok novel is finally finished. im so happy that im pissing, shitting, and jizzing my pants all at once

im so glad to be done, now everyone can read my literary prowess, this baby is flawless and going straight to kindle unlimited, no editing needed B)

So I have been writing a book, and for the last 7 chapters (that is how long the book is right now), my characters have been doing nothing but having sex. I think this will be great for readers when I publish my book, but I ran into a problem. Most stories tend to have a plot, as well as characterization so that reader can understand why a character does what they do. Is this necessary for my story, or can I just keep writing more sex? Please help.