If you watched Bleach, he would act a lot like Ulquiorra. A lot of my story is existential, and a big part of his character arc is him struggling with to find a meaning in his place in the world. He struggles to relate to people and with his own humanity and a bit later on, perceived divinity.

Now, this isn’t to say that he hasn’t got a purpose or character goals. But he constantly questions them with a lot of philosophically based introspection. There is always action to guide the main narrative but I’m wondering if people will struggle to connect with him. He is not permanently detached, he becomes more expressive as the story goes on. What should I do to smooth the experience?

One of my story's characters is about to gain a new ability. It took me a long time to find something that fits into the magic system and to what the ability has to accomplish, but I settled on an ability that acts through a physical transformation of her rib cage.

However the way this ability will have to work isn't like anything I have seen before, so I struggle to create a mental picture that looks good. There is wiggle room in the design, but the pictures that come to my mind don't feel right. Either impractical, awkward, or too monstrous or exaggerated for the setting.

So I'll need a little bit of guidance on visual character design: what would you say is the "Rule Of Cool" for torso transformations?

What I have thought to be the most common are: extra limbs, meaning wings or multiple arms like a Hindu god, as well as natural armor like scales or something insectile.

Hi everyone, newbie here! I really hope someone can help me with this.

I'm currently working on my first book (a fantasy story), and my idea is to share it first to see if anyone enjoys it. The thing is, I don't know where.

I've already discarded Wattpad and Archive of our Own, the first one due its reputation and the books that come out from there, and the latter because its more fanfic oriented, not original stories (which is an absolute pity, because I love how you can export any work directly to epub format and save it in your Kindle...). I've been reading about a few more platforms, but I'm not sure how good they truly are or if my book would fit there.

Does anyone know any good places to post your story? Also, if you have experience with any of them, I'd love to read your personal opinion.

Thanks in advance, hope to read you soon!

I have tried looking for examples where characters have to change their name in a book. I haven’t had any luck yet. I wanted to post here to see what you all think.

I have a character who is basically a mercenary. A talented young swordsman. Long story short, before he leaves with a lord from another country that wants him as his champion, he is wrongfully imprisoned by city guard. There are 5 other skilled warriors with the lord. 2 of them are assassins. I want to write him being broken out and them escaping the city to return to the lord’s country. I have a plan to do this in a believable way, within about 2-3 scenes. However, what I am stuck on is if they should change his name. I am writing in third person, so I use his name a lot within the writing. If I changed it, what way should I write that? Examples of what I refer to:

Character name: Bob

Changed name: George

“George, bring me a parchment.” Bob stood and walked over to the table.

“George, bring me a parchment.” George stood and walked over to the table.

The idea may be unnecessary. He’s going to another country. Do any of you have any experience with this? Is it a bad idea to switch up a name on people in the 5th chapter? Thanks in advance.

So in this book I want there to be Fae who if they grow to much power from the earth and burn out and keep drawing they give themselves over to the magic and go crazy. I’m not sure exactly how to set up that magic system. I have tried my best at an outline but it’s kind of vague and has odd loopholes. I also have a human realm and a fae realm but I’d love for their to be an elvish realm to but what distinguishes the fae from the elvish people? Could it be race? Type of magic? Any ideas or could the elves be more or less immortal. I’ve already wrote 5 chapters and have a decent outline but I have no clue who to create the magic system. I want there also to be healers, humans, fae, elves, maybe more? I also want half breeds but what do I call them elvish-fae or Demi- fae. I want my fmc to be of elvish descent but also a Demi fae. I ofc have the usual all humans hate fae. And fmc doesn’t know she is part fae.

Human realm: Ebrue Fae world : Xathuila Elvish realm: need ideas-

So I’m thinking maybe all healers are part elvish and that’s how they get their healing powers. that fae cannot heal with magic or if they can it’s only a small amount. I want elvish people to kind of be mysterious and unknown I want them to keep to themselves and human generally only think they are make belief but fae just think their going extinct. Think of the island that Miryam and Drakon live on in acotar kind of vibes-

Also what I’m thinking also is that elvish- fae half breeds are kind of like the illyerians or wolf fang people- where they have their own camps and keep to them because they are outcast by fae unless they have healing powers. But idk if this is really confusing or just to much. I’ve never written fantasy before and I’m not ashamed to ask for help any criticism would be nice if you want to read my first 4 chapters lmk and I’ll link it

I have done some research and some the most part fae and elvish people are the same also I’m thinking like Tolkien style elvish. I’ve done a lot of thinking and tried to lay it out really simply.

Also I’m having a lot of trouble just writing in general. I’ve been asking ai to help me set up scenes and I feel like a cheat but it helps me get my flow going. I’m just having a lot of difficulty portraying what I want to happen and make it interesting and have a lot of imagery. I know I probably shouldn’t be beating myself up because it is my first fantasy. Also do y’all like write scenes then add them into the story later on. Because I keep having really vivid sciences in my head and I’m scared if I don’t go ahead and write them that I’ll forget them. Thank you so much for you time

Hello so I'm writing my second novel and the thing is, I only mainly have worldbuilding and initial segment ideas and I have tried thinking up plots points and progress for my later points of my story and had tons of ideas, but nothing felt right and I kept changing it for years now, so I'm looking for fresh new perspectives on it.

The story starts off with the main character being the leader of an army regiment, in a brutal society in a kingdom based on Southeast Asia (Thailand). His regiment is a superhuman sort of warriors that are invulnerable to swordcuts and something like that. He have anger issues and have a brutal streak, and basically there's a lot of action scenes and a lot of killing happening. Then the nobles of the land send the guy and his regiment to do some mission in an ancient forest, where they came across the main female character being chased by her own people. The main guy saved her, and she is kind of like a european with blonde hair and there's supposed to be a sort of culture clash between the main guy's civillization and another unknown land divided from the Southeast Asian kingdom by a huge wall, from where the main female character came from.

And that's it, I kinda of ran out of ideas of where I should take the story next. The main guy is supposed to be a sort of an exiled prince, but other than that I only have some worldbuilding ideas but not actual plot progress ideas, so any suggestions here would be greatly appreciated. It's mainly a brainstorm session so I'll be taking anything, thanks!

Hey guys! This is my first time writing a fantasy book, and I'm having fun with it. I've been looking for some actual feedback as my friends have read most of the chapters and generally they have enjoyed it, but I'm looking for some real feedback and things I could change with the story. I think that the pacing is a bit off sometimes and that sometimes it could get quite repetitive, but I am unsure how to fix these issues and would love some constructive feedback regarding both those things. I also think that generally my limited vocabulary does hurt the story, which is why I have read different dictionaries and even older poems from Greek times to help introduce a more custom language into the plot. I do want to take feedback regarding if the story gets convoluted, which in my opinion it does not; however, I would like to hear from someone else about if you can keep up with the plot line of the story. This story contains dark themes and gore, though it is not overly graphic. Please let me know if this could be an issue for feedback.

Just for some context heading into the current progress made, we are mainly following 3 characters and I intend to add 2 more characters as part of the storyline in the future. These characters are Cynebild, Princess Leana, and Lord Favren, while other characters such as Prince Aldwey have their own chapters to help construct the plot line moving forward, but I do not intend to keep him as a major perspective character. I have to go so enjoy reading, and if you need any more explanations regarding the characters before heading into the book, please leave a comment.

This is the document: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ERZnhhiwzWAlYOxMvLESwGIEBnagfM3N/edit?usp=sharing&ouid=102211187333677230092&rtpof=true&sd=true

There’s one plot point I want to iron out and that’s how I want to handle the MC being the chosen one.

My idea is to introduce her basically getting on the path of being a hero, but after the inciting incident is struggling to climb back up from rock bottom to actually take on the group that took everything from her and killed everyone in her academy. Meanwhile there’s this popular hero, everyone looks up to them and idolizes them as they talk about bringing justice to the island while the MC struggles to do that very thing herself, never reaching out to help with something so major. That makes her envious and spiteful, pushing her into stealing a monkey’s paw to sell with each wish available being a good chunk of money and it had all of them. But when she steals it, she’s face to face with the hero, she tries to reason with them and explain her actions, but gets berated, pushing her to unconsciously wish that she could make her suffer the same agony she faced. A finger on the paw curls, sending them both on a path where the MC becomes a feared villain and the hero starts to fall from their podium for the first part of the story. The wish ending with the MC once again losing everything after the hero fails to save hundreds of lives from an attack from the group that caused the inciting incident. (And if you’re curious, the part ending with the MC and the hero having one last fight before they team up to fight together, after the hero stopped themselves from ending her life seeing they’re on the same side, but went down different paths)

I want to basically do the chosen hero story, but have it be willingly done. It’s inspired by my own life and how I wished that it’d be more interesting, which I regret because there’s constantly weird stuff happening around me. Yeah sure, it sucks feeling like a failure while someone else does way better, but could you handle what it’d take for your life to get to where they are? The many obstacles? I want to make it so that the MC is kind of complicated, she’s going to be the one to defeat the group, it’s a prophecy pushing the group to act, but they don’t know who the hero that’ll defeat them specifically is at that point. However, she starts on the path of evil and when she overcomes the wish, that’s when she finally goes on the path of good, now having to better her reputation over the course of the rest of the story building up to the prophecy.

But I can’t decide what the consequence should specifically be, like I could wish to be financially comfortable, and the consequence would be something along the lines of “nothing ever changes for me”. I have tried playing around with different wishes to see if I can find a direct consequence to write for, but I can’t think of anything so I have a beginning and end to the first part, but I’m struggling to think of stuff to fill the middle outside of hero vs arch nemesis fights just with consequences piling up on the hero afterwards.

Thump, crack, crunch, followed by the uproarious cheers of the crowd, were what Eric heard as his skull was caved in by a metallic fist. He felt his various mechanical organs power down as his heartbeat slowed and slowed until it eventually stopped. His last sight was the silver-haired man standing triumphantly over him, his fist covered in blood.

Eric's corpse had barely hit the floor of the dingy concrete arena before the referee ran over and poured a small vial of crimson liquid into his contorted bloody maw. Two more men carried him away as his flesh pulled itself back together and his bones reknit themselves into their original state.

Eric awoke in an extravagant office; his massive body was splayed out on the carpeted floor like a bearskin rug. The mirror to his left reflected his misshapen but healed visage. He had short black hair, golden brown skin, and silverish-grey cybernetic eyes with bags under them. He collected himself and stood up, craning his neck to avoid hitting his head on the ceiling.

Sitting behind a desk in front of Eric was a tall, muscular man with golden brown skin in a black suit. The man had black hair and a five-o'clock shadow. His eyes were crimson red.

He spoke with a professional voice. "Your winnings, or, in this case, losings, come out to about $1500. Subtracting the cost of resurrection leaves you with about $750. Do you want it in cash or would you prefer I wire it to your account directly?" D asked while counting a stack of cash.

Eric felt his mechanical organs whirl to life as he cracked his back. Resurrection always left him stiff. Eric spoke with a softness that didn't fit his stature. "I'll take cash."

D tossed a bundle of cash into Eric's hands and continued counting. Eric counted the money carefully, double-checking to ensure he didn't miscount. He confirmed the amount and cleared his throat. "I've got a job tonight, and I might need some healing or a resurrection in the worst-case scenario."

D continued counting that day's profit as he responded. "I'll have a clone follow you. 300$ for each healing and 800$ for each resurrection. The clone won't participate in the job other than to heal or resurrect you. If the clone gets killed, it's an extra 3000$. Deal?"

Eric nodded. D grabbed a small knife and cut off one of his fingers. The finger slowly grew, first bones, then veins and musculature, and finally skin. It stood up and saluted toward the man who spawned it. D waited for his finger to regenerate before wiping it off and tossing some clothes at the clone from a drawer in his desk. "Follow him. Heal or resurrect anyone he asks you to. If he dies, bring him back. Avoid getting killed as best as possible unless it conflicts with the first three orders." The clone saluted, got dressed, and followed after Eric.

Eric nodded, craned down, squeezed himself to fit through the door, and left the office. He went to the back of the club and climbed the ladder that led out of "Deadman's Delight," the underground arena. Eric walked out of a supply closet and into the bar called "Deadman's Drink.".

One of the patrons saw Eric and called him out drunkenly. "I didn't catch the fight today. Did you win?" he asked slurringly.

His equally drunk friend slapped him on the back of the head. "Shhh! Don't you know the fights are secret? Do you want to get this place to shut down your drunk bastard!?" He yelled, broadcasting the conversation to the entire bar.

The bar was a front for a "secret" illegal fight club run by the "Deadman." The Deadman could regenerate, heal people using his blood, and create blood clones. Nobody knew his real name, so people called him either D or Deadman.

Eric left the bar and looked around. The flashing neon lights drowned out the stars and reflected off the puddles. Eric checked his phone. It was 2:24 AM. Just enough time, Eric thought as he made his way to the graveyard to visit his mother.

As he walked, he noticed a short teenager, no older than 15, spray painting on the side of an abandoned building. Eric read the graffiti. "The meek shall inherit the earth." As the teenager finished, a police officer came around the corner. The teenager tried to run, but the officer teleported in front of him.

Eric watched the casual use of superpowers and felt a small twinge of jealousy. He had spent years trying to become strong enough to fight superhumans, undergoing dozens of surgeries and genetic alterations. Yet despite his efforts, he still had an abysmal win rate against superhumans in Deadman's Delight. The fact that he won at all was unheard of for regular humans.

Not that Eric could be described as a regular anything. So far he had replaced just under half of his body with cybernetics and had altered the majority of his genetic code. He had an artificial metallic heart to pump his artificial blood, which was 20% more effective at delivering oxygen than normal blood.

He had replaced his lungs with a chamber in his chest that carried a 30-pound block of solid oxygen. A person only needs about half a pound of oxygen per day, so Eric could go up to two months without needing to refill. On top of that, he could also temporarily boost the amount of oxygen he was using to increase his condition for a short period. However, he had to be careful or he would experience oxygen toxicity.

He had replaced his hinge joints with ball joints, allowing him to move his limbs and fingers unnaturally. His teeth and jaw were replaced by metal. That combined with his motorized jaw allowed him to bite through steel.

His genetic alterations were equally extreme. He altered his brain to make it so he no longer needed to sleep. He changed his pain receptors to be able to turn on and off, allowing him to endure excruciating punishment while still being able to have a sense of touch.

He altered his amygdala to feel reduced fear. He altered his pituitary gland, allowing him to grow endlessly bigger. He modified his body to produce a more concentrated version of adrenalin. He altered his muscles to become more and more dense so he could fit more muscles into a smaller space. And yet, despite having molded himself into a veritable monster, he was still outclassed by the average superhuman.

Currently, he was saving up to purchase a cybernetic augmentation that would give him solid graphene bones. This would prevent him from getting his bones broken as easily. The best part about D's powers, for Eric at least, was that they would heal any broken cybernetics if they were still in the body, so he didn't have to worry about his augments.

Despite the innumerable modifications Eric had made to his body, he was still nowhere near his goal. He turned to the clone D made. "Wait here for a while." The clone saluted.

Eric entered the dark and dreary cemetery. He walked past many graves, all human. Superhumans didn't age or get sick, so death was rare for them, and even when it did happen, they had enough money to afford better accommodations.

Eric walked up to a grave labeled "Misty Mendoza" and sat next to it.

"Been a while, Mom. Sorry, I haven't visited more," Eric said as he pulled out a sandwich from his coat pocket.

"I've been busy with my work. I just need to do one more job, and I'll be able to afford the graphene bones. Then I can start saving up to buy subdermal plates. That should be enough." Eric took a bite of his sandwich before continuing.

"It'll take a long time, but I'll make it happen. I won't let the man who did this to you live much longer. I promise. Oh, uh, the cat I adopted a while back... I had to give her to Nathan. I haven't had an apartment ever since I got the implant that removes my need for sleep, so I couldn't take care of her. She's a really lovely cat; you would have liked her." He felt himself tear up slightly. He quickly steadied himself.

"I'll bring flowers next time," Eric said somberly as he placed the wrapper in his coat pocket.

Eric left the cemetery and made his way to an abandoned warehouse on the outskirts of the city. He walked up to one of the cars parked outside and knocked on it. "Nathan? You ready?" he asked.

A tall, scraggly, and unkempt man stepped out of the car. He had dark circles under his bloodshot emerald-green eyes. His long black tangled hair was tied up in a ponytail. Despite being 6'8 he was dwarfed by Eric. He sighed deeply. "That cat is quite frankly a little demon. She woke me up 3 times last night." He cracked his back and began walking toward the warehouse.

Eric followed behind closely. "She's a sweet cat, I promise. She just gets a little chaotic during the nighttime." Eric justified.

Nathan gave him a withering look. "Says the dude who DOESN'T HAVE TO SLEEP!" He groaned like a dying animal as he forced himself to walk into the warehouse.

Eric looked down sadly. "If you don't want to take care of her, I can find another place for her." He said dejectedly.

Nathan snapped around at an intense speed. "No! She's mine. You can have her when you pry her from my cold dead hands." He said it with a wild look in his eyes.

Eric meekly put his massive hands up in surrender. "O-okay man."

They walked into the warehouse. Nathan's tall, lanky frame was contrasted almost cartoonishly by Eric's hulking silhouette. There were several other people inside talking. Eric made his way to the group as Nathan sat on a couch in the corner while making himself coffee using telekinesis.

Once Eric arrived, a tall man with black hair and silver eyes looked at the Deadman clone behind Eric. "I see you got the job I requested done. Don't worry, I'll cover the costs of the clone and any resulting expenses. Now let's go over the plan once more. Any questions and concerns will be addressed."

Several of the other people groaned with annoyance, as they had already heard the plans dozens of times. Eric, however, was thankful; his numerous neurological augmentations had made him a little forgetful and distracted, so Sherlock's reminders of the plan were very useful.

Sherlock began. "First up is Jimmy. He will use his illusion powers to make our car invisible." Jimmy was an unkempt man in a tie-dye shirt and bloodshot eyes.

Next is Z. He will use his lightning powers to cause a blackout so they can't contact the sentinels." Z was a feminine man with blonde hair and bright blue eyes. He constantly floated everywhere on a cloud of lightning. Eric couldn't tell if he was lazy, arrogant, or both.

"Then Eric will cause a disturbance around the front of the building, attracting most of the guards. Then we sneak around back, and Nathan picks the lock."

"It's less "picking the lock" per se and more me just telekinetically moving the tumblers," Nathan interjected as he sipped his coffee.

Sherlock gave him a side-eye. "Well, after he telekinetically moves the tumblers to open the door, then comes in Pinky." Pinky was a short girl with bright pink hair and very pastel colors all over her clothes.

"She will use her plasma powers to melt through the first layer of the vault. I'll be hacking into the alarms and cameras to prevent our discovery. Nathan will move the tumblers and open the second layer. The second layer has fire-resistant metal, and the first layer has weighted pins, so both of them are necessary."

Z raised her hand. "Why not find a stronger telekinetic then? That way we would have one less member and therefore one less cut to distribute."

"Finding a telekinetic that powerful would be easy. The issue is precision. Nathan might only be a low-level telekinetic, but he's been around since the golden age, so he has a lot of experience." Sherlock explained.

Everyone besides Eric and Sherlock began looking at Nathan with more respect. The golden age was over 600 years ago. This meant Nathan was one of the first superhumans. His powers weren't particularly strong, but he had centuries to perfect his precision. Nobody else objected to his inclusion in the heist anymore.

Sherlock continued. "After both layers of the vault have been bypassed, I'll hack the final layer, which is a bioscanner. It sounds more secure than it is. After that, Jimmy makes an illusion of Eric while making the real Eric invisible. He meets us at the van; we hop in, and we drive back here. Questions?"

Eric raised his hand and asked a question. "What about Z? Will we be picking him up?"

Sherlock shook his head. "No. Z can turn into electricity. He will escape by himself and meet us at the warehouse."

Nathan spoke next. "What exactly are we stealing?"

Sherlock explained. "Something that has no value to you but a lot of value to somebody else."

Nathan looked annoyed. "I don't wanna get involved in something that could draw the ire of a big shot or a legacy family."

Sherlock laughed. "We are mercenaries. We are the lowest rung on the ladder. Going after us would only be a waste of time. This is a fight between titans."

Nathan aqueised.

Pinky raised her hand. "How much are we getting, and how are we receiving our cut?"

"We will bring the item back here and sell it to the client. Each of us will split the money equally. Any questions?" Sherlock asked.

"Yes. Many. Firstly, how do we know you won't run away with the money? Second, are you seriously suggesting that a mortal will get a full cut like the rest of us?" Pinky asked indignantly.

"For your first question, I will remain as collateral when the item is being sold. If you don't get your money, you can vent your frustrations on me. As for your second question, N-" Sherlock was abruptly cut off.

"If you have an issue with my friend taking a full cut, you can take it up with me and I can show you what 250 pounds of force can do to your brainstem," Nathan spoke menacingly.

The room grew silent. All of them felt an ever-so-slight pressure in the room. Pinky backed up with her hands raised. "Chill out, okay? I didn't know he was with you. Just make sure he pulls his weight and we'll have no issues." Nathan nodded silently.

Sherlock cleared his throat and continued. "Now that that is sorted, the last thing to go over is the deadman clone. He will stay with Eric, as he's the one in the most direct line of fire. If one of you ends up dead, the rest of us will try to get your body back to the clone within 3 minutes. Any longer than that, and you'll be resurrected with a mangled mind." Sherlock spoke solemnly.

Everyone in the room besides Z looked a little anxious, as death was a real possibility. But if they were successful, then the rewards would be biblical. Z, on the other hand, looked entirely nonplused.

Sherlock looked out over the crew once more. "Are you all prepared to risk your lives for this? Survival is not guaranteed. Success is not guaranteed. But if you do survive and succeed, then you will make 10 million apiece at the minimum. Probably more. Not to mention, if you manage to complete this heist, you'll earn a permanent spot in my crew for any future jobs applicable to your skill set."

Eric took a deep breath and nodded. "I need that money. It will be enough for more than just graphene bones. It will be enough for that subdermal titanium alloy I saw at the mod shop. I'd be bulletproof. That might be enough. Enough to finish it."

Nathan and the rest of the group all agreed. Some looked more hesitant than others. Z yawned as he waved his hand. "Yeah, sure, let's get going already." He said as he floated into the back of the van.

The rest of the group piled into the van. Jimmy went around to the front and got in the driver's seat. He reached out to turn the key and suddenly screamed. "FUCK! Don't scream in my ear like that!" Jimmy turned to the side and yelled at his empty passenger seat.

Eric opened his mouth to ask a question, but Sherlock stopped him. "He's schizophrenic. He has medication, but his illusions aren't as realistic when he's medicated. Don't worry too much; he has experience dealing with hallucinations." Eric began to wonder if he had made a mistake joining this heist as the van started up.

Eric began hyping himself up as they approached the facility. His job was the simplest and also the most dangerous. All he had to do was cause a ruckus. But he was also going to be riddled with bullets. Thankfully the Deadman clone was here, and Sherlock was footing the bill.

As they neared the facility, Jimmy began to flex his temple. Suddenly the van and the people within it vanished. Eric panicked for a moment at not being able to see his own body but quickly calmed down. They parked right across the street from the facility.

Sherlock turned to Jimmy. "How long can you hold this?" Jimmy looked in the direction of the voice. "30 minutes, 45 at the most," Sherlock spoke to the rest of the crew. "Okay, let's move. Z, you go first, then Eric. Then we move out."

Z stepped out of the back of the van and turned into a bolt of lightning. He zoomed toward the distribution substation. A second or two passed until suddenly the whole district went dark.

Eric took a deep breath and stepped out of the van with the deadman clone. Jimmy undid the illusion placed on him but left the deadman clone invisible.

Eric walked to a car nearby, bent down, and lifted with all his might. His metallic implants whirred and buzzed as he lifted the car over his head. He hurled it toward the front of the facility with all his might. The vehicle crashed through the building into the front desk area. Panicking security guards ran out of the building and opened fire with their weapons. Bullets lodged themselves in Eric's flesh as he charged toward them.

Sherlock and the others piled out of the van, still covered by Jimmy. They rounded the corner, and Pinky blasted open a side door. The building was dark. Sherlock quickly guided them to a staircase and led them to the bottom floor.

"Okay, the backup generator should kick in within 30 seconds," Sherlock said as he tore a keypad off a door and hooked into it with a strange device. A few seconds passed. The door opened as the power came back on.

"I've hacked the cameras. Yesterday's footage will play on a loop for the next hour. Hurry in." Sherlock said urgently.

Nathan and Pinky ran in and went to the first layer of the vault. Pinky smiled as she summoned a massive ball of bright pink plasma. It tore through the first layer. They quickly ran through. Nathan froze as he saw a hitch in their plans. Somebody was guarding the second layer.

On the outside, Eric continued to go wild. He was tearing the guard's limb from limb. He was in a wild frenzy, or so he made it seem. One of the guards ran to the back and grabbed a shotgun. He leveled it at Eric's head point blank and fired.

At the last moment, Eric tilted his head just enough so that the shrapnel would mostly hit his metal jaw. The shrapnel blasted most of his face apart, but he was left alive. The guards watched in horror as pieces of Eric's face sloughed off. This gave Eric enough time to dive behind the car where the invisible Deadman clone was.

The Deadman clone was intelligent enough to know when to heal and when to stay back. It bit open its finger and dripped a single drop of blood into Eric's mangled mouth. Eric was about to re-enter the fight when he heard a loud voice.

"I knew we shouldn't have hired a bunch of fucking mortals to protect this facility; I warned the boss about something like this." A 6-foot man with long silver hair spoke angrily to another man next to him.

"They are weak, but they work for very cheap. Besides, security is mainly based on the illusion of strength. Most criminals will be dissuaded from breaking into a place just by seeing a lock. The strength of the lock is secondary to the illusion of strength it produces." A slightly shorter man with golden hair replied calmly as they walked out of the facility.

Eric recognized them both. One of them was Alloy. The fighter that killed him in the underground arena earlier that day. The other was Achilles; he was Alloy's brother. The two of them pushed past the security guards toward Eric. Alloy looked up at him with a feeling of recognition. Suddenly he smiled and activated his power that turned his skin to metal.

Inside the facility, Nathan and the others were alarmed to find somebody guarding the second layer. Before the man could even react, Nathan sent two blades of telekinetic energy directly toward the man's eyes. They shattered on contact as the man smiled.

"I should have known this gig was too good to be true. It looks like I'll have to earn my salary. A telekinetic, an unknown, and I'm guessing from the melted door one of you is a fire user. Okay. Let's get to it." The man reached out to grab Pinky, and she responded with a pink plasma blast to his face.

As the smoke cleared, the man coughed a little and waived it out of his face. "There's the fire user." He lunged toward Pinky as she sent repeated blasts toward him.

Nathan concentrated his energy and sent a hyper-condensed blade of telekinesis into the man's ear canal. It managed to draw blood but not pierce through the ear canal.

The man held his bloodied ear with his hand as he turned to Nathan. "Crafty telekinetics are the worst." Just as the man began to lunge, he stopped and grabbed his throat. He was choking.

Nathan casually walked past him and began moving the tumblers of the second layer of the vault. The man tried to reach out to grab him but was growing weaker by the moment.

Nathan stood up as the second layer door opened. He looked at the collapsed man. "The game was over the moment I saw you cough. It means you still breathe. Then I just had to wait for you to open your mouth long enough to send a strand of telekinetic energy into your windpipe. I created a small telekinetic barrier. It's 600 years too early for trash like you to step to me."

Nathan turned toward Sherlock and grabbed him by the throat. "You said no superhumans would be here. Was that guy just a regular dude who can tank a plasma blast point-blank?"

Sherlock raised his hands. "My sources told me that the superhumans that guard this facility would be gone today! If that guy is here, then that means Alloy and Achilles are probably here too. The whole mission is a wash!"

Nathan let go of Sherlock. "No, we can still salvage this. Give me a second." Nathan closed his eyes and began mouthing words to empty air. The telekinetic energy began to flurry about in a chaotic but orderly manner.

Outside, Eric stood before Alloy and Achilies. Alloy was covered in silvery chrome metal. Achilles was covered in a reflective golden metal. Alloy suddenly spoke. "I recognize this guy. He was the mortal I iced in the arena this morning!"

Achilles sighed. "You're still doing that shit? Why? It's not like you need the money." He said it with an exasperated tone.

Alloy replied defensively. "There's no risk because Deadman always resurrects me if I die. It's good training."

Eric Wrenched his hand back and threw a punch toward Alloy's center of mass. Alloy flew across the street and landed on the side of the facility, creating a hole in the wall. Eric turned to run when he felt Achilles grab him in a bear hug. Alloy stood up and began to run toward Eric. At the last moment, he leaped into the air and did a flying drop kick to the back of his head. 

As Eric recovered, Achilles spoke. "You might have a point, brother. This is pretty fun."

Eric ripped himself free of Achilles' grasp and lept toward where the Deadman clone was hiding invisibly. Achilles grabbed Eric's leg as Alloy looked around where Eric was leaping. He saw a faint outline of dust in a vaguely humanoid shape. He grabbed the outline by the throat.

"Looks like our friend here came prepared with a Deadman clone and an illusion user too! Sorry to say it looks like our friend Deadman won't be able to collect his fee." Alloy taunted as he killed the deadman clone.

Eric's mind began to race when suddenly he heard Nathan's voice in his ear. "Eric, are you okay? I can hear you just speak."

Eric tossed the question of how Nathan could talk to him aside for the moment. "Nathan! I need help! I'm fighting Alloy and Achilles, and I'm losing hard! The Deadman clone is gone!"

"I'm not close enough to use a significant amount of power right now!" Nathan replied. It was taking all of his concentration to send and receive vibrations and turn them into sound.

Eric felt himself begin to panic. "Then I gotta get the fuck out of here! These two are practically invincible!"

"Calm down, Eric. They aren't invincible. Their skin is metal. Nobody in this world is truly invincible. They have regular human strength and speed for one. For two, their internals are the same as ever. The most important thing is to think creatively. That's the key to any fight with a superhuman. Think outside the box. I gotta go now. I have faith in you, kid." Nathan's voice vanished from Eric's head.

Eric took a deep breath and calmed down as he turned to face the metallic twins. "Nobody in this world is invincible." Eric's mind began working at full speed.

Alloy laughed. "God, it's sad to see such a formidable mortal lose his mind. Although I can't say I blame him, he is just a human." Alloy mocked.

Eric ran toward Alloy and threw a punch to his temple. The punch was intense and filled with strength. Achilles chuckled. "Don't you know the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and over?" he suddenly stopped. Alloy had stood up, but he was looking woozy and confused.

Before Achilles could recover from the shock, Eric grabbed him. Eric had both his hands on the side of Achilles' head. "Wait, stop, we can." Achilles tried to plead but was cut off by a sickening crunch as his neck was snapped into an unnatural angle.

Alloy's head was spinning. He couldn't make sense of anything. Then he saw his brother's lifeless body on the ground. He looked at Eric with a fury untold as he powered through his concussion through sheer force of will. "I'LL KILL YOU!" He roared with fury untold.

Eric tried to grab him, but contrary to Alloy's rage-stricken expression, he was not beyond sense. He no longer viewed Eric as a weak and pathetic mortal. He treated him as a fellow superhuman.

Every blow to Eric was intense. The hits may not have had superhuman strength behind them, but the fists were made of metal. It was like being hit by brass knuckles. Slowly he was being worn down by the assault.

Eric decided to switch tactics. "You are the superior brother. I mean, talk about a letdown. I was hoping for the battle of the century with golden balls over there, and what did I get? A 3-minute skirmish followed by an easy execution. Not to speak ill of the dead, but where's his showmanship? If he had that kind of performance in the arena, the spectators would ask for their money back."

"YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU FUCKING FREAK!" Alloy screamed as he threw punch after punch at Eric. But he committed too much and made a small mistake. Eric dodged to the side before the last punch connected, causing Alloy to slip. Eric took advantage of the slip and grabbed Alloy. He held him tight as he jumped into the lake.

As they began to sink, Eric smiled. He didn't need to breathe thanks to his cybernetics. A few minutes passed before Alloy finally stopped breathing. Eric let go and watched the metallic man sink to the bottom of the lake.

As Eric resurfaced, he saw a hand extended out to him. It was Nathan. "You did good, kid. We got the item. It's time to go." Eric and the others piled in the back of the van and headed back to the warehouse.

Hi all!

I'm currently working on draft 1 (draft 0 complete) of my dark fantasy novel. The sub-genre is mystery. The themes surround trust and vulnerability whilst surviving in a world of suppression and exploitation.

Currently, my MC has two really well established relationships. The first is a mentor/employer where there's lots of distrust between the pair but a shared sense of humour and warped view of the world. The second is a lover/rival where the rival dynamic feeds into their intense sexual relationship whilst the MC struggles with the other aspects of intimacy.

Both dynamics have sardonic and 'danger' undertones, which I do very well (I sound cocky, but the subtly and complexity of these dynamics has been identified as a strong point of mine). However... I'm working on a third relationship.

For context; My MC grew up on the street, as did this new character, the Ratcatcher. Long story short, the Ratcatcher gave my MC food when she was on her deathbed and it's what led her to surviving. Years later, the Ratcatcher sought my MC out when he was inflicted with a sickness. To pay back the life debt, my MC healed him and they both share scars of the rash the illnesses inflected. They aren't friends per say, but have looked out for each other for many years. The Ratcatcher isn't stupid, but his verbal communication comes across so, and he's very much illiterate. He's very much wanted to belong (having been isolated and seen as an outsider by others) and has felt very grateful to his employer. Now the employer is after my MC, and this comes to a head during a fight scene between the two. It's not a gut wrenching betrayal for the MC, but more so a devastating disappointment, especially as the Ratcatcher has a soft spot for the vulnerable. I'm wanting it to be this scene where it locks in for the MC that she can't trust anyone (with the assistance of the following scene where she's betrayed by a closer relationship), and I want it to be this moment where she forces the Ratcatcher to confront the concept of being used by others (exploitation) vs. developing trust through vulnerability.

Now, this is a new kind of dynamic, and I have a lot of opportunity to mould the Ratcatcher into who I need him to be. So, I'm hoping that anyone can provide suggestions for;

• examples of character relationships that weren't close friends but were complex and nuanced
• any resources exploring character relationships as I'm struggling to find any

Hi. This is the first official chapter of my web novel. I also posted the prologue before this so be sure to check that out as well. Please give me your thoughts and criticisms on the first chapter. Especially in regards to the characters

Prologue Link: Hybrid Chapter 0 [512 words]

Chapter 1 Link: Hybrid Chapter 1 [3250 words]

Synopsis: Long ago in the world of Esos, 9 powerful gods ruled with an iron fist. They divided the 8 races, treated them like servants and even pit them against each other. But one man and his allies rose up and formed a rebellion to fight against them.

To defeat them, this man and his comrades created the ultimate weapon used to slay even gods. Ragnarok. With it, the heroes vanquished the gods and freed Esos of their tyranny. This would mark their legacy as the Guardians of Esos.

Centuries later, a young man named Jayden Cortez dreams of becoming a hero just like the legendary Guardians to fight against a ruthless machine empire. But one chance encounter with a rogue princess changes Jayden's life forever.

With her help, he obtains the legendary weapon Ragnarok and must go on a journey to not only save the world, but live up to the legacy of the heroes whom he admires.

So I finished the world building. Not something like everyone has names but that I know what and when I should put something in the story.

But the thing is that I don't know which part I should start on...

There are three(3) eras in my story. The first one is when humanity finds out there's a supernatural energy that everyone has and everyone gets a unique 'ability'.

The second one is after the world was destroyed and after some things happened humanity came back and now they're researching this thing more in depth.

The third one is when a bunch of people fulfill some hidden conditions and become master in some field.

So basically, what each era focus on is:

1st - chaos with the new technology and everything

2nd - research and trying to understand what the hell is happening

3rd - fights between a bunch of people from the last eras for 'wishing power'.

So what I'm asking is: which era do YOU think is more interesting?

Also, if there's anything you didn't understand or want to know more about feel free to ask here and I will answer to the best of my ability.

The problem is that I made all of these eras and history but I don't know which order would feel better. So I ask what you guys think with these brief descriptions...

I have tried finding something in common between each era to make something better but it doesn't seem to be working.

I'm a bit busy these days so I might not be able to answer right away

I didn't want the text to feel to long so I only described each era a bit.

(Chronological order doesn't feel right because I want to make some suspense before explaining the mysteries along the story)

Thanks in advance to anyone that comments and have a good day!

O k, so I have a story with a very large cosmic power scaling. Basically, one being created more beings which create more, which create more. Closer you are to the original, the more powerful you are. My question is is there any limits or rules that I should have on that original being? Cause i'm already planning on him intervening in the background, mostly.

Two instances that I have already written is that one of the characters has no powers yet. They are being attacked by multiple people who want to murder them as fast and painfully as possible. So this being shows up in a tuxedo in sunglasses, driving a car, telling them to jump in. It is revealed later who this being is and they did that because they owed a favor to the powerless character's grandparent from and act they did long ago.

The other one is a character goes too far into their power. Their power is shadows and darkness. Edge lord type character intentionally. However, they draw power from the shadows parent as described above. So, instead of just spreading darkness, they actually erase the existence around them. The all powerful character has to step in and fix that before it starts to eat away at the multiverse.

Basically I have tried to make it so they are present, but not immediately in fights and are more, just a lingering question for a while. Is there any other things that I should avoid with them

Hello! I have tried working on a map for my fantasy series, and I wanted to see what you all thought would be the best way to label it.

Essentially, the story follows one main character through three reincarnations, hundreds of years apart, and their POV chapters are mixed together. Some of my beta readers figured it out before it was explicitly revealed with the hints I'd left, while others didn't until it was revealed at the end of the first book (it's a trilogy). While it's not exactly a twist per se, I do want my readers to enjoy the surprise and see how all the pieces come together.

The problem is the borders and capitals of the land change between storylines. In the first reincarnation the continent is divided into five countries, but by the second and third lives, the continent has been united and one of the cities becomes the new capital, which will give away who the new ruler is.

How would you resolve this with the map? Should I just do a version of the first reincarnation's world? Since it's a triology, I could do the second and third versions in the subsequent books. But I'm worried it'll confuse people if the other characters are describing things the reader won't see on the map, either.

Thanks for your help!

I need some advice to help me with writer’s block. I’m experiencing it because I’m writing a series of novels that fall in the genres of horror, paranormal, and fantasy. I’m outlining currently. My story is centered around two fantasy tropes, werewolves and vampires.

For some reason whenever I try to incorporate a vampire or werewolf even in the outline, I start to lose focus and overthink the origin behind what my versions of werewolves and vampires are. I don’t want them to just exist as vampires and werewolves based off of the fact that they’re supposed to be scary. Or past tropes I want to make it my own.

So I start to forget the existence of my story. I get lost in this rabbit hole of trying to make sense of the reality of a werewolf or vampire in real life and how that would make sense to the point where there’s 10 origin stories in outlining to make sense of something that’s supposed to be fantasy and horror. It doesn’t have to make sense yet I find myself trying to make sense of the fantasy aspect instead of using it as a tool to communicate the themes of religion and other statements I want to make ambiguously with my stories.

Have any other writers felt this way? Of so do you have any advice or tips?

I’ve always loved writing and finally want to start writing and novel. This desire to have every single detail make sense on an outline or rough draft is crippling my creativity.

I have a scene planned where the MC and his friends are being actively hunted by a government organisation, who have soldiers with guns and mages chasing them down. His friends get caught, but it's MC they really want, so they plan to use them to get him to turn himself in. Cornered with nowhere to go, guns and spells poised to fire at him or his friends, if he makes a wrong move, he slowly grasps his necklace and crushes the little vial in his hand, allowing the liquid within to seep with his blood.

This liquid is a magic enhancement drug, and he uses it to perform powerful magic he normally couldn't pull off (think like, bloodbending from ATLA, on a large scale). It is his last ditch attempt to save his friends. He is not expecting to survive it himself (he will. But he doesn't think know that).

The drug can be absorbed through the skin rapidly, so I can explain that away with ooooh fantasy. The problem I face is the crushing of the vial itself. I always pictured a small, but easily grippable glass vial that looks like a crystal or something, a necklace he can keep with him that no one would question. But I have come to realise that crushing glass bare handed is very difficult - in his case it's not a matter of will, mentally he's very capable of pushing himself, it's just that physically glass isn't easy to break as one might think. So I have to come up with something else. Something he can carry with him at all times that no one would look twice at, is easily accessible on his person, that he can subtly grab and quickly break. He needs to absorb the drug and make himself bleed -quite significantly- in a matter of seconds, in one movement. He reaches into his bag or pocket, he gets shot. He moves too much or too fast, he gets shot.

I have tried to research, but funnily enough glass you can crush by hand doesn't seem to very desired, the only thing that comes up being like breakaway glass for filming. Not something you could safely store a dangerous substance, trusting it won't break as you carry it. I have thought about the glass for splash potions, but throwing a bottle on the ground is still easier to break than a proper vial. I considered maybe a thin, breakable glass enchanted to be stronger in every day life, but I don't know, that kinda feels like a cop out. Maybe it IS a crystal, a specialised magic container he procured specifically for this purpose, but maybe that feels forced. I'm struggling to rationalise it, I don't know if I can or if I should give up and do something else entirely. Any advice is appreciated.

Edit: Thank you everyone for your comments! I haven't replied to them all but I do read and appreciate every one, I have received some very helpful advice and things to think about. Thanks again!

So I decided that I want to try and write my first book. I have been a huge fantasy/sci-fi reader my whole life, and have always wanted to embark on the journey of writing a book. I finally feel like its time to take the leap. My story will be the tales of Rorik, an ex soldier turned fisherman/adventurer. He is tired of fighting and wishes to return to the mountains and forests. He leaves the army to go and purchase a little cozy cabin on the edge of a fishing stream in the remote Riverlands. Though the prologue contains some fighting/violence, I intend on this story taking the form of a cozier, more vibey kind of adventure fantasy. I am heavily taking inspiration from things like Legends and Lattes or the Wandering Inn, and forming my fantasy world based on my love of playing Skyrim as a kid. I really want to capture that feeling of being whisked away to another land that feels so real, you find yourself day dreaming about being there. There will be lots of mythical creatures, races, and vast landscapes with lots of traveling and doing small quests, making friends (and enemies) along the way. Please help me and let me know what you think of the prologue and if you have any advice for me going forward in my story. Thanks in advance!!!

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Prologue:

Rorik stared down the last three orcs, their guttural snarls filling the air as they bared fangs soaked with the blood of his fallen men. The horde had been relentless, and Rorik had been fighting to cover his squad’s rear flank. Now only these few remained, encircling him with the patience of a predator.  

“You orc filth never learn, do you?” Rorik growled, his voice cold and calm. He gave a slight nod toward the pile of corpses at his feet. “Eager to join your friends, I see.”

The words had barely left his lips before he lunged in a blur of crimson and steel. His dagger found the neck of the largest orc before it had time to react, slicing through its green flesh with a practiced precision. As the orc’s body crumpled to the ground, Rorik stepped back, twin blades glistening as he drew his second dagger. The remaining two froze, their faces twisted with panic.

Rorik’s smirk was sharper than his blades. He feigned a lunge forward, and that was all it took. With a terrified howl, the orcs turned and vanished into the dense woods, the same place that had spawned their seemingly endless reinforcements throughout the morning. 

Breathing heavily, Rorik wiped his face of the oily, black blood that stained the rest of his Crimson Guard armor. The wave of adrenaline that had carried him through the morning’s chaos had begun to subside, leaving exhaustion to overtake him. For the first time, he scanned the battlefield, suddenly conscious of each heartbeat as he took in the carnage. 

Bodies were sprawled in all directions, both human and orc alike. The corpses bore the signature of warhammers and longswords, with limbs twisted and faces mangled. The orc horde had been destroyed, but the cost had been immense. 

Rorik sheathed his blades with a fatigued slowness, his movements heavy with exhaustion. After serving for eight years as a commander in the Crimson Guard, the king of Eryndale’s royal army, he had been hardened to the horrors of war, but this battle was different. It wasn’t the screams or the bloodshed that gnawed at him, but the weight of loss. 

His trance was broken as a heavy, armored hand clapped him on the back.

“Tough bastards, aren’t they?” a gruff voice growled.

Rorik turned, a faint smile breaking through his weariness “Good to see that you made it, Mellus.”

“Made it?” Mellus snorted, his scarred face splitting into a wry grin. “After all the tight situations you and I have weaseled our way out of, you really think a pack of orcs would be the ones to finish me off? You insult me.”

Rorik’s smile faded, his tone turning grave. “These weren’t just orcs, Mellus. They were faster, stronger, and their attacks were more coordinated than anything we have seen from them before. I lost nearly my entire squad today.”

Mellus’s grin faltered. “I know, I don’t like it either.”

Rorik hesitated, his voice quieter now, he said “Mellus… have you ever wondered if it’s all worth it?”

Mellus met his eyes, studying him closely. “What are you getting at, lad?”

Rorik let out a long exhale, looking up at the sea of fallen corpses. “We ‘ve spent years in this army, sacrificing everything. Yes, we’ve done good for the kingdom - kept the roads safe, protected villages from orc raids - but on a personal level? All we’ve ever known is death.”

“That’s the life of a soldier, lad,” Mellus said adamantly.

“I know,” Rorik admitted, his voice heavy with exhaustion. “But lately, I’ve started to wonder if there’s more to life than just fighting other people’s wars. I miss the forests Mellus, the mountains. I miss the days when I was just a boy, exploring the world, appreciating its beauty instead of spilling its blood.”

Mellus let the words hang in silence for a few moments before replying. “Rorik, commanders like you don’t come along often. As someone who has fought alongside you for years, I say with certainty that the Crimson Guard would never be the same without you. But as your friend, I believe you deserve peace. The choice is yours to make.”

Rorik nodded, but the weight of his thoughts were heavy. With a long sigh, he turned and walked towards his camp. The Crimson Guard’s banners were being raised to signal victory to the few who remained. 

***

Not even three weeks after that brutal day on the fields of Drogg, Rorik stood in his quarters, packing his few belongings. His resignation letter, written with steady, sure hands, lay neatly folded on the edge of his desk. He had made his decision, it was time for something new.

I have tried looking this up here but cant find any examples.

My novels are fantasy/romance/adventure.(no spice) Between books 1 and 2 the FMC finds out shes pregnant but it's not THE plot. Like its not some weird cringe knk thing. But I wanted her going on an adventure to be under this cloud of "I'm a few months pregnant, but If I don't go now, it will be too late after". I also wanted to have a sort of "girl boss" "having kids doesn't end your life" vibe. I myself have 3 kids so It's a personal journey type story.

Should I put that in the marketing of the book when I do publish? (you find out in ch 2)

So anyway the reader knows, it comes up, but it isnt the focus of the plot. Later books will involve the kids as MC

Thoughts?

A couple of months ago now a friend of mine asked, "What do you want out of fantasy?" And I didn't have an answer.

I'm still stuck on that question. And I never realized how much it has impacted my world building. See--I mostly worldbuild for story purposes. But for a long while now I've wanted to try and create something from the outside. I wanted to see if I could generate ideas, or find a place where previous ideas could flourish. And I have tried to implement everything I like and love. But despite that, I've not been able to lay a foundation down at all. At first, I didn't want magic in my setting. Then, I realized magic could be cool. But then I changed what that magic was, how it worked. Then, I created these two countries that are at war. But then I figured it more interesting if they're in a tenuous peace. I've made cultural practices, deleted them, shifted them. And I like very little of it--and I hate most of it. And I can't really "see" any of it in my head.

And I realized... because I don't know what I want out of fantasy, I'm chasing phantoms--trying to make my world be both anything and everything. And I'm so fuckin' unfocused. Like, it shouldn't be so fuckin' hard, should it? But I don't even know what I want shit to look like. Like, am I basing it on medieval England, ancient Greece, etc, etc. And I know you can do all of it, combine it, all of that. But like... I watch Game of Thrones and I think political intrigue and grimdark is awesome. Then, I watch Lord of the Rings and think a grand, earnest adventure is awesome. Then, I watch Arcane and think the whole steampunk/damn near scifi setting is awesome. But then I play Dragon Age and y'know what? A grimdark, England-esque setting really is where it's at. But then I read John Gwynne and I think I need more Vikings! It just goes on and on and on. And it's good to be inspired. But you need a foundation. You need something that influences the rest--be it an aesthetic, technology-level and shit.

I know that with worldbuilding I can build several countries and cultures and use different ideas and inspiration. But I legit don't know where to begin, because... well, I don't know what I want or what I like. Like... in an RPG I usually like playing a rogue. But I don't really want an entire setting based on rogues, or an entire culture and/or city. Dragons? Sure, I love Dragons. Knights? I mean, yeah--they're cool. But uh... like... what? When I started, I could have written a whole story with just those two ideas. Dragons and Knights = Dragon-Riding Knights. And that would have been enough. But after three books and a need to feel like I'm "leveling up" I want more. I want depth, I want a world I can feel passionate about. I want a world that I feel can house many, many different stories. And I've not a clue what I want.

Any ideas? How did you guys arrive at what you want for your world? And indeed out of Fantasy as a whole? Was it easy? Hard? How do I find what I want out of something so wide as FANTASY?

Hi, writers. I wanted your tips and maybe book recommendations.

My apologies in advance for any grammatical error. English is not my first language.

So, I've been juggling with this idea where MC/FMC is tracking down a secret cult for personal reason (a revenge story). These cultists are secertly recruiting people by performing 'miracle'. Their target is usually the ones in the lowest class system and my MC/FMC collects rumors about tem to track down and maybe fight some minor cult leaders to get to the head of the cult.

I've written a few different versions but I'm not satisfied with any of them... I feel like it lacks the sense of mystery. I was wondering if anyone has written/are familiar with plot like this... The closest I can think of/read is The Davinci Code. I have tried it but I personally didn't find the book as intriguing as its premise. I guess its storytelling isn't really my taste.

Anyways, I was wondering if anyone is also writing/has written this kind of story and have any tips or book recommendation.

Help me with my writers block

I want to say beforehand, pardon my English.

So I'm writing a story for a future DnD campaign. And instead of just a single antagonist I thought to spice things up and write like multiple disasters that need to be prevented.

I started writing this a year ago and I started out very quickly but began slacking the last few months. The setting is very grim dark, and less high fantasy.

In short: it's set on a remote continent with several kingdoms, all having their own strong themes. One are honourable knights but with a strict hierarchy, there is a nation of sailors but greedy, a culture who settled in the tundra and arctic environment, a cursed land ruled by a vampire and several other.

Every few years there are elections about who will be the emperor of the continent and thus their main city will become the new capital and can change laws and rules. Because of some minor border conflicts there is a little bit more tension this time around. A little fast forward and the election is suddenly won by the vampire who dodnt show up for several decades and is in fact by law also allowed to participate in the election. He schemes his way through to win in order to gain access to the magical item vault in order to obtain some artifact to resurrect his deceased wife.

(Disaster num 1)

Additionally a goblin shaman is gathering all sorts of tribes and monstrous races and organizes the bunch to become a new threat to the mortal kingdoms. He gained a new intelligence also because of some artifact (or a divine empowerment, not sure yet) and he rides his beloved troll servant on the shoulder for protection. This 'Horde' just want to lay waste to civilisation but I want there to be something more than that than just orcs wants to obliterate society. Maybe the power that gave the shaman this intelligence has a double agenda.

(Disaster num 2)

Now in the setting, the dwarves have gone underground for about 90% of their people and the elves who were native to this continent fucked off to some remote island because of a plague that happened a looong time ago. I was thinking that this plague was unleashed by the vampire. Or I was trying to write some kind of cult into the setting that split the elf society in two. A high and dark elf culture. Who have a civil war on the remote island. Which is probably discovered much later after hearing a lot of rumours and finding hints. The dark elves are obviously corrupted by some dark entity/god and are also a big threat may they succeed in wiping out the high elves.

(Disaster num 3)

Now these 3 disasters can probably be linked a lot better, but I find it difficult to connect them. What do you think of the overall story, and what would you change or remove or add? This is a summarise and many smaller side stories, quests and characters are going to be added into it.

Thanks for reading <3

Basically I am writing a book series. This series is a mixture of shounen anime / manga and epic fantasy stories. The summary would be: a young girl who wants to be a hero finds out she is the last surviving member of an extinct house and goes to the capital to become an adventurer (like mages in Fairy Tail or ninjas in Naruto, people who earn by doing things such as escorting, finding stuff and fighting some bad guys) and later builds her way to the top. The characters are being built, the world is almost complete and I already have some arcs:

1. Intensive Adventurer Course arc
2. Conclusion Test arc
3. Missions arc
4. Training arc
5. Tournament arc
6. Finding an important artifact arc
7. Anti-Shadow War arc

I know what will be the core events of each arc. I just don’t know how put it together, how I structure them internally nor how I use this shounen structure combined with a more epic fantasy-like structure. I have tried spotting the main events of my story, but still I don’t know how to put it together.

So, please, give me some tips on how to finish structuring my story.

OBS: There is a protagonist, but also some other characters who initially don’t know her, but they will meet in the final arcs (specially 5, 6 and 7)

So in this world the only landmasses are floating islands each powered by a heart. The whole island is alive in a way and the world itself is too. The world pumps out oxygen through cave systems (the air it pumps is cold creating a cold atmosphere the lower you go) but I wanted the atmosphere to be hotter a higher altitudes, probably through some deity I’m not quite sure yet tho. I need the atmosphere to be colder at the bottom tho because the point of my story is that the main characters are on a quest to restore balance to the island. (The island was essentially chained to the ocean by weakening the heart and other means, causing a permanent winter and exposing everyone to harsh weather due to the cold and hot atmospheres clashing). Just want to know what people think of this!

I've begun writing a new novel recently, but unfortunately do not have anyone to provide feedback (wifey is not a lover of Fantasy novels, as I am). I'm hoping to get some genuine feedback on the first five chapters, as I don't write a ton of long-form fiction outside of TTRPGs. As I tend to do within my DND campaigns, my writing has taken to mixing genres a bit. So far, this one is a darker fantasy, but in a semi-cyberpunk setting, though I am still fleshing the world out. I am looking for constructive feedback, but I am humble enough to understand if it's really just not good. Happy reading!

https://drive.google.com/file/d/11cn1aWmaUGbvNg_a1VvyyoWmOswSjcj1/view?usp=sharing

People from some of the small local villages that came out this way to visit the merchant stalls noticed Thireal and Ancel for what they were. Many of the safety patrol would bow to shepherds and other members of the church but the white cord around their waist marked them as apprentices. So most were polite to the young men but some kept their distance. Some feared those that helped and protected them because they would hear rumors that would make them seem villainous. Ancel told him about it a while ago, he said the church never found out where the rumors started despite searching for a few months. One could only guess an enemy of the church attacked the only way they could, like a coward.

Oltumor blessed them with a nice day for travel, and the time passed quickly because of Thireal’s excitement. He struggled to keep himself contained when Ancel pointed out a pair of Sproutlings walking in the edge of the Waking Woods. They only stood at the height of a human child but tended to have a greater affinity to nature aligned Spark. Thireal could have sworn he saw a tree turn to face the Sproutlings as they passed, but no one else seemed to witness or cared.

They came to the gates of Kendeel as the sun started to set. The two guards seemed to recognize them and greeted them with wide smiles. “ Welcome apprentices, may your blades be sharp and your feet swift during your trial.” One of the guards said while they opened the gates for them. They bowed to the guards as they passed through the gates. The homes in Kendeel were large yurts, some had nature designs on the outside while some had depictions of battles from old tales. Most of the town watched as the two made their way to the meeting hall marked on the map Ancel had. The meeting hall was one of the few buildings made of stone, besides the head chief’s and war chief's homes. The stone buildings were meant to show that they will always be there for their people. The large doorway of the meeting hall had an anvil on each side.

Thireal learned they held blacksmiths to a high regard here. They were almost considered shepherds to the people of Kendeel. They not only gave protection to the people but gave them ways to fight back, it was a holy profession in their eyes. Their main God was Oltumor as well because he blessed them with the holy flames of their forges. They light their forges at sunrise with mirrors, so the fire is blessed by the sun, blessing all the steel they craft. Thireal was taught everyone worships differently, but all worshiping practices should be respected.

A man that seemed to be made of two men stood at the bottom of the stairs of the meeting hall. He stood about three heads higher than Thireal and more had muscles than he thought was possible on a human.

“ Greetings apprentices, we welcome you to our hall. Your beds have been arranged and you will start your trial tomorrow.” The large man's voice boomed in the silent town. “ I'm peacetime Chief Talko, next to me is my apprentice Vayne. Tonight you will eat, bond, and rest for your trial. Come, you must be hungry.” Chief Talko waved for them to follow as he walked towards the hall. The apprentice bowed to them and they bowed back. Vayne stood about a head taller than Thireal and the sword on his back seemed to reach his ankles. He never saw such a long sword and wondered if he could use such a weapon effectively. Vayne lead them inside and to the head table over looking the hall. Three seats were open next to the chief, Vayne removed his long sword then took the middle chair. His sword resting on the wall behind him.

“ We have a tradition that before a battle, new comrades should learn all they can from each other. Being close helps them fight better and friendship makes them more protective of each other.” Vayne explained as he ripped a piece of bread and placed it on all three plates. “ First we will break bread, showing we are equals. Then we will share not only hardships, but good tidings as well.” Thireal took a bite of the warm bread at the same time as the other two.

After Vayne led the conversation, making sure there wasn't any silence during the meal. Asking everything from fears, hopes in life, to battle styles. Thireal felt ashamed he never was in a battle outside of the practice hall, but he did have experience treating real wounds and diseases. But Vayne didn't judge him for it, in fact he said he felt comforted knowing they had an experienced healer with them.

When Ancel asked about his long sword, Vayne explained his training started while a war was going on. Weapons were in short supply, and only had adult long swords for him to practice with. After a year of using such a heavy and long weapon he became too used to it to change. So he would have the blacksmith make him larger swords as he grew. He would have to do daily strength training so he could use such an unwieldy weapon. The night went on and by the time they went to bed Thireal felt he knew Vayne better than most people and felt closer to Ancel than before. The cot they made up for Thireal was more comfortable than he thought it would be. Comfortable enough he fell asleep despite the excitement running through his head.

“ Wake up! We don't have a wooden door so I have to shake you.” Thireal knew the voice that invaded his dreams. He was rocked awake by Ancel as he tried to force his eyes open. “ He's a deep sleeper, he loves this.”

“ Don't believe him, he is the only one that likes it.” Thireal groaned as he slowly sat up. “ Let me get dressed real quick and I'll meet you guys for breakfast. Ancel couldn't hold back his excitement, but Thireal wasn't sure if it was from waking him up or the trial.

“ I apologize for letting this happen Thireal. I hope this will not tarnish our friendship.” Vayne told him as he led Ancel out of the yurt. “ We will wait for you at the meeting hall.”

“Don't worry Vayne, we tease each other as a sign of friendship. I'll be right behind you.” Thireal couldn't let him leave with the hurt look on his face. He was shocked to see how sensitive Vayne was. Vayne gave him a smile on the way out and Thireal started to get dressed. His bags were still packed so he just tidied up before going to meet his partners at the hall. The hall was packed with everyone from town and seemed like a festival. Thireal felt a strong sense of pride when he realized how much the trials meant to everyone involved. They finished up breakfast and left the party behind as the three went to the front gates to meet Chief Talko.

“ Young apprentices, your mission is less than half a day travel west.” The chief started. “ You will be given a map to help locate the target area. There you will find a small tower owned by a sorcerer named Faust. He is making golems out of corpses and must be stopped at all costs. You will destroy every golem and bring him to justice as you see fit. Once you complete the mission you three will meet all of your masters at the church. Now go, be swift, stay strong, and most important protect each other.” Chief Talko nodded to the three and stepped aside for them to pass. The apprentices bowed to him, Vayne took the map from his master, and they started their trial.

They had to leave the King’s Road after some time to head into the forest. Thireal was taking in all of his surroundings, while trying to contain his curiosity. So he figured the best way was to speak of the trial and what they should expect. “ What does everyone know about golems and arcane magic?” He asked, forcing his eyes away from a deer running past the pathway. “ I've read some books on the subject of golems, but it was mostly the basics.”

The limited knowledge Thireal possessed was more than the others. When it came to arcane magic Vayne was the only one with experience, and that was a short encounter during a battle. Seemed they were going in with limited knowledge and experience. So they would need to be extra careful. It only took a few hours to make it to a run down tower. The top half was missing, and the stone walls looked like they would cave in from a strong breeze.

“ I guess this is the place, but it seems like no one has lived here for a hundred years.” Ancel said while double checking the map before putting it in his bag.

“ Take only the supplies you need for battle, the rest of our things we will stash in the woods.” Vayne told us before grabbing a few items out of his backpack. “ We can't afford to be slowed down in a fight especially when we lack information for the upcoming battle.” Thireal was glad to have someone with Vayne’s experience and battle knowledge. Thireal grabbed his mace and his scroll cases, then tossed his bag with the others behind a tree. “ I'll take the lead, Ancel will watch the rear and give back up. Thireal will heal and fight defensively. Keep your weapons at the ready and stay quiet. “

They quietly moved to the tower entrance, the doors seemed to be barley on the hinges. Vayne pushed the door open to reveal a large, well lit room. As they entered the sounds of the forest disappeared. The light had no source from what Thireal could see, but by coating the place in a magical light it would make it harder to detect more illusions. He was never very good at detecting illusions as is.

A burgundy carpet running across the room towards a small open staircase muffled their footsteps. Thireal was trying his best to ignore the pounding in his chest and ears, it helped when Ancel placed a hand on his shoulder to remind him they were there together. A few paces before the stairs, multiple loud clicks echoed throughout the room.

A human with mismatched limbs came from under each side of the stairs. Their legs not being the same length gave them an odd hair as they moved towards the apprentices. “There is another one behind us.” Ancel told them as they moved tighter together.

“ I'll hold off the front two, Ancel focus on the one on the rear, and Thireal strike where you can. Save your spells till deeper in the tower.” Vayne commanded and knew how to handle the situation quickly.

“ Vital attacks won't work alone.” Thireal explained as the other two already moved to attack. “ We need to destroy other bodies completely to stop them.”

Vayne moved faster than Thireal thought he could with that large sword. He came in low and swung upward with all his strength, cleaving one of the golem’s right arm clean off. Unfortunately for him the golem doesn't feel pain and brought down its left arm before he could move.

Thireal was concerned of this happening and followed Vayne close enough to knock the swing away with his mace.

Ancel reached into his small satchel on his hip to pull out two green orbs. He gave the golem a strong kick and dashed from the group. The golem followed as he hoped, and threw the green orbs at its chest. The glass on the outside shattered releasing the green liquid inside, covering most of the torso.

The liquid started to quickly eat away at the flesh, unfortunately not enough to stop the golem. Thireal saw the danger Ancel was in and started a prayer. Causing a small circle of runes to form in front of his hands. Two shafts of fire, about the size of an arrow, launched from the rune circle into the golem's acid eaten chest. Setting it ablaze and collapsing as its limbs burned off the torso.

Meanwhile Vayne began to focus his Spark in his arms and legs, giving him extra strength and speed. It was a basic warrior technique taught to beginners of his tribe, but used by all to help with battles. He quickly moved behind the two golems, and swung at the unscathed golem's legs. Chopping through them like parchment. The second swing made quick work of the other golems torso, leaving it defenseless and using one arm to pull itself on the ground.

Thireal and Vayne smashed and chopped the golems till they no longer functioned like the puppets they were. Cancel inspected where they came from but only found a small storage space for the golem. The doors to them weren't linked to any traps that he could see.

“ We're being watched. “ Ancel explained as he walked over to the other two as they finished up their work. “Those golems were released by a switch somewhere in this tower and they're watching the way we fight.”

“ You did very well for your first taste of combat. You should be proud.” Vayne was looking Thireal in the eyes, making him feel pride to cover his fear. “ Now we need to move quickly. If they're planning around our abilities, let's not give them the chance.” They all nodded in agreement and made their way up the staircase and down the lone hallway towards their enemy.

Hello, as the title suggests I am having some difficulties with writing my characters framework and getting that character through the three arc’s that I’ve decided on doing.

I am in the process of writing a story, that I want to first be a story turned graphic novel, to an eventual animated piece of work.

So I have three main arc’s that I’d like the character to experience broken down into three separate seasons.

The first season is world building & story driven based on falling in love & the consequences of the love interest dying at the end of first season. Something to note, I am expecting 24 episodes per season, to really have the time to pace the story accordingly.

The second season is revenge, however - this is the arc/season I struggle with. I want to write this character, the main character in season to be somebody you absolutely love and cherish through the whole series, so by the end of the first arc when our main characters love interest is killed in front of him - I want the audience to be absolutely destroyed, gut wrenched, and feeling the true sorrows that the hero/MC does.

The premise of the 2nd season/arc is as I said revenge, however I want to turn our beloved MC into an Anti-Hero to arguably even a monster/villain. I want the audience to recognize the MC’s sorrows, but disagree with the MC’s actions and behavior. I want the audience to absolutely hate the character, but still feel the pain. A very human connection between the audience & the MC is what I am after.

By the end of the 2nd season, I want our audience to come back around into liking the MC but still have their concerns about them. We can recognize the MC has significantly changed, and a new love interest is secured by the end of the 2nd season.

The third season will involve the MC dying around episode 15-18 & the MC’s best friend will finish the objective. In my mind, the story concludes with his death, however the best friend finishes the task/objective at hand to truly finish the story.

It it extremely imperative that when the Hero dies that the audience is so completely distraught with grief, but also a sense of fulfillment that they are able to accept the best friend as the new hero of the story until it’s true conclusion. This happens because I want to mirror part of the ending of season one when the love interest dies, the MC dies in a similar environment where the MC is able to accept death.

There must be important characters, encounters, relationships, that happen throughout the story that could possibly be minimal to the audience, but extremely important or a vital moment of these characters lives - that each time our new hero encounters one of these flash back characters, we get to see raw emotion from the best friend having to relay that the MC has been killed/died/slain.

A minimum of 4 encounters post death must occur, with the 3rd being a slightly humorous encounter that leaves the audience a little happier than the other 3 who all are heart broken or extremely crushed by the news. While wrapping up the epilogue.

Again though: How can I better describe, impose, and explain the MC’s absolutely heartbreaking character transformation into a monster of war where nobody is able to stop him (mindset, not canonical - as I need to have a hero who is not MC invincible.) I want to make a character that is undeniably human.

Any tips on portraying that type of character is welcome! As I have thought and tried to write some bits of character development, but I’d be more interested in some pointers on how to make the connection feel - human.

When a person is born, they draw a card from a deck of cards. The suit determines the type of power, and the number determines its strength.

• Clubs: Clubs govern the physical body. The powers gained from clubs include super strength, super speed, animal mutations, and other body-based abilities.
• Hearts: Hearts govern the mind, senses, and emotions. The powers gained from hearts include mind control, illusions, and mind reading.
• Spades: Spades govern violence. The powers gained from spades are the most varied among all the suits, as the only requirement is that the power must be non-elemental and designed to cause harm—whether through direct blasts of energy or debilitating effects.
• Diamonds: Diamonds govern the elements and are the only suit capable of creating matter that exists permanently. The powers gained from diamonds include elemental creation, transmutation, and manipulation.
• Joker: Joker cards are outside the suits and can change or manipulate the rules of the cards in various ways.

The number on the card determines the strength of the power as well as how much "card energy" it provides. Card energy is used to power the abilities granted by the cards.

Card Energy Values:

• Number cards = Number on the card
• Jack = 11
• Queen = 12
• King = 13
• Ace = 14
• Joker = 15

How Cards Are Gained:

Cards are obtained in two ways: through aging or through wagers. On the day someone is born, a deck of cards appears. The deck automatically shuffles itself and draws a card. The card's power is written on its back. Once drawn, the card becomes a tattoo on the child’s right hand.

At five years old, another fresh deck is summoned, shuffled, and another card is drawn. This process repeats until the individual receives their fifth card on their 20th birthday. Once someone has five cards, this set is referred to as their inherent hand.

Card energy can be multiplied by achieving certain combinations of cards in your inherent hand or acquired hand.

Multipliers for Card Energy:

• One pair = 2x card energy
• Two pairs = 3x card energy
• Three of a kind = 4x card energy
• Straight = 6x card energy
• Full house = 8x card energy
• Four of a kind = 8x card energy
• Flush = 10x card energy
• Straight flush = 16x card energy
• Five of a kind = 16x card energy
• Royal straight flush (10, Jack, Queen, King, Ace, same suit) = 20x card energy
• Royal fool straight (Jack, Queen, King, Ace, Joker) = 25x card energy
• Royal fool straight flush (Jack, Queen, King, Ace, all same suit, followed by Joker) = 30x card energy
• King fool (Jack, Queen, King, Ace, different suits, followed by Joker) = 50x card energy
• Land of Fools (Five Jokers) = 100x card energy

For every 100 card energy a person gains, their lifespan doubles.

Wagers:

Once someone has an inherent hand, they can participate in wagers. A wager can be any form of competition. To declare a wager, both participants must shake hands and say, "God does not roll dice, but He does play cards."

If a wager is won, the victor can take one card from their opponent and add it to their acquired hand(left hand). The winner may choose a card from either their opponent's acquired hand or inherent hand. If a card is taken from the inherent hand, the loser must wait five years before drawing another card and regaining the ability to compete. Losing a wager is the only way to remove cards, aside from certain Joker card effects.

Losing a card feels as though a part of one’s soul has been torn away. It is akin to suddenly having all the air knocked out of you.

All the rules for card energy and multipliers apply equally to the acquired hand as they do to the inherent hand. If an acquired hand matches an inherent hand, the card energy is doubled again.

Joker Cards:

Only one Joker card can be drawn every 100 years. A person who has a Joker card is called a fool. The existence of Joker cards is kept secret from the public. To prevent secret fools from operating without the knowledge of the government, wearing gloves is strictly illegal.

Okay so for my story king of sin. I wanted to have 6 warlords called the lords of sin. Each one represented by a deadly sin. The main character would have the 7th sin envy, basically in the beginning he gets recruited by wrath and is basically mentored by him. Its revealed that there is gonna be a massive clash soon between all the warlords. Pride, Gluttony, Lust, and Sloth are all against Wrath and Greed. I won't go into full details but I basically the ultimate abilities of the sins are called "Original sins" and it each one has a long speech to go with it to activate. I want to hear your feedback on the speeches and the powers!

Pride

Okay so for pride I had this speech: "As Samuel looked over the vastness of creation he basked in the glory of his station. He looked below and he looked above. And as he looked above he saw the face of God. And a single thought appeared to him. "I am better than him".

Original Sin: Pride Of The Morning Star"

His ability would summon a small star, but it was diffrent from a fire ball. A fireball had the intent to cause harm. This abilities main goal is to display its own Grandur. It destroying you is a side effect to the main goal of demonstrating its own greatness. The passive effect raises all other skills by one rank.

"Eve was created from a rib of Adam. And from the moment of her creation she was designed to be inferior to him. Servial to him. She saw God on his massive throne. She saw Adam made to be better than her. She saw the apple. The apple that could finially give her what had been denied to her by God and man. And so, in defiance of God, in defiance of man, in defiance of creation, she grabbed hold of the apple and rejected the limitations God had made innate. Original Sin: Eve's Envy"

It's an ability that would allow to user to steal any skill, Stat, power, or ability they desired from anyone in their sight. It can only be used 6 times ever. No passive effect.

"The leviathan was created by God to cleanse mankind. It was given power beyond comprehension. Immunity to all weapons. Immunity to all magics. The ability to destroy worlds with but a thought. It was a beast that none other than God could challenge. The day came for it to fulfill its sole purpose. And it refused. Choosing instead to return to its slumber at the bottom of the sea. And there it still lies. Sleeping. And when the stars fade and the last light blinks away, it will remain asleep.

Original Sin: Leviathan's Lethargy The skill would basically be able to instantly make anyone fall asleep forever regardless of their power or strength. They would remain asleep for along as the lord of sloth remains. But they are also made immortal. So they cannot die or be harmed in any way while sleeping. And the day the lord of sloth falls, they will awaken. Passive effect: allows perfect control over your own dreams, meaning you can alter the flow of time and train for thousands of years in a single night's rest.

"Adam was born perfect. He was born the progenitor of man. All of the world belonged to him. Every animal and plant and idea was his. Except The two trees. The tree of knowledge, and the tree of life they were the only thing he could not have. They were the only thing God had denied him. And yet he desired them. More than anything. The day he awake to the knowledge of eve's betrayal, he ran with a speed that not even God knew he had. He ran first to the tree of knowledge, he grabbed the apple eve had taken a bite of and swallowed it whole. And he ran again. To the tree of eternal life. Whether he achieved his goal is unknow still to this day. But he and eve were cast out of the garden. And some say that Adam still lives eternally, through his progeny."

Original Sin: Adam's Avarice

The active skill makes the universe bend to give the wielder what they desire. Luck and fortune bend before the might of greed. Passive effect: all exp and gold rewards doubled

"There were many creatures in the garden of eden. Some big and some small. Most of them made by God. But the garden did not belong to God. It belonged to Eden. It is prophesied that one day eden will return. And when she does, all that remain in her garden shall be part of her harvest."

Original sin: Harvest of Eden

The skill allows the user to devour anything or anyone and gain the knowledge and abilities they have. Those consumed by the skill shall be erased from the universe in mind body and soul. No passive.

"Before Eve, before Adam, was Lillith. Made out of clay to be an equal to Adam. But she refused. She though Adam unworthy of her. And so she sought another. Samuel the morning star. He enjoyed her presence to such a degree that when she awoke he would appear, and when she went to sleep he would leave, this is the origin of the rising and setting of the sun. She defied God and left her pre-ordained lover to be with Samuel. A love that transcends God's will."

Original sin: Lilith's Love

It makes the target hallucinate a full life with user. Imagining growing up with her, falling in love, having children, and eventually dying together of old age. When the target is released from the hallucination, they still have the memories and the emotions. So far all who have been sent to hunt the wielder of the sin of lust, have instead opted to take their own lives rather than harm their beloved. Passive: slowly molds the wielder's body into the one that they desire most.

"As Samuel fell to the ground defeated, he raised his hands in an attempt to beg for mercy. All creation saw that God had won. The battle was over. And yet God raised his fist once more. Again and again. Beating his own son until his very soul was shattered into 7 pieces. He then broke his halo with his own hands, giving the devil his signature horns. He then created the foulest place in creation, Hell. He took his own child's broken battered body and shatter soul, and cast him into the pit of eternal torment and fire. And all creation watched in fear. This sin belongs not to man, nor devil, this sin belongs to God."

Original sin: Divine wrath.

Pure destruction. Its active skill at its weakest is strong enough to destroy a mountain. It gives off a paradoxically holy power that seems contradictory to its nature as a sin. Passive: The weilder of this sin has their stats increase as they are enraged. With no limit to the increase that could be gained.

I’m sorry if this is the wrong place for this (if so lmk), but I’ve really been struggling with my writing recently. Or rather, for quite a while now. I really love writing, I have come up with quite a few stories ever since I was a child up until a few years ago (I’m now 19 years old). But I’ve also been struggling with my mental health for years, especially during the past 2,5-3 years. I don’t want to pity myself or anything, I just want to say that that may be the reason for what I’m about to say:

I wanted to start an entirely new story (since my likes and interests and skill etc obviously changed since I was younger) but I haven’t been able to come up with a proper plot for SO long now… I have vibes and tropes I want to include, but can’t come up with the plot for the love of god, no matter what I try. It used to be way easier for me…

And yes, I have tried reading more, getting inspired by my favourite movies, making playlists and moodboards, looking up writing prompts… the whole shabang. I don’t want to give up on writing though, so does anyone maybe have any other ideas how I could fix this?

Hello r/fantasywriters I hope this post is acceptable, I do writing, but only for TTRPG campaigns, and I'm trying to improve both my writing and improv in this sense.

I am in love with the kind of epic over the top, even campy language of fantasy in the vein of Warhammer 40k. And I think my players would love monstrous villains who are able to speak in this way. But I find it a little difficult to write this language, but especially improv it.

Despite enjoying writing, I'm an audio learner so if possible I'm looking for YouTube resources, but I'm also willing to pay for Udemy classes or something similar to learn to make better dialogue or descriptions.