/r/insults

Photograph via snooOG

Insults. Plain and simple, you cum gargling fuckwit.

Welcome to /r/insults!

Guidelines and Information

  • These are insults, they are meant to be insulting and/or shocking.
  • Insulting each other in the comments is allowed, and even encouraged.
  • Don't link to your own site. We will remove spam links when they appear.

If you like this you may want to check out:

  • /r/Jokes

  • /r/tifu

  • /r/TraditionalCurses

  • /r/insults

    24,329 Subscribers

    4

    Catch-all comeback for any insult

    Sorry, I don’t speak moron/retard

    3 Comments
    2023/02/05
    18:21 UTC

    2

    I’d rather pick howard stern’s nose with my bare fingers than shake hands with you

    0 Comments
    2023/02/05
    05:16 UTC

    9

    That insult was trash. Where’d you get it, the insult subreddit?

    2 Comments
    2023/02/05
    01:38 UTC

    9

    You're So Ugly......

    You're so ugly, your birth certificate is an apology letter from the abortion clinic.

    6 Comments
    2023/02/04
    01:25 UTC

    2

    my arse and your face

    0 Comments
    2023/02/04
    00:27 UTC

    0

    Guys i need your help for this

    There is this girl taking random snaps of me in class and sending it to other people without my consent, any insults?

    2 Comments
    2023/02/03
    20:47 UTC

    0

    Insults for a girl who has parents that dont care what ever the fuck she does

    It could be going to london alone until 3am or like getting 300 pounds everyday cause she asks for it

    0 Comments
    2023/02/03
    20:14 UTC

    7

    Please keep crying, I need the salt from your tears to flavor my food

    0 Comments
    2023/02/03
    17:51 UTC

    3

    I don’t know why you have such strong opinions on abortion.

    It’s not a situation you’ll ever personally have to deal with. Of course that hinges on your concept of consent; which with your track record you should be forced to wear a bell around your neck.

    25 Comments
    2023/02/03
    09:10 UTC

    3

    Look in the mirror and see what a sorry excuse for a person you are

    Me: Hi

    Insulty: Hey loser, what do you want?

    Me: Look yourself in the mirror and then tell me

    Insulty: Hahaha, why don't you look in the mirror and see what a sorry excuse for a person you are?

    ---

    There is a chatbot named "Insulty" that you can also try: https://chatfai.com/characters/RaVPQRFZrvK3pRzX3tCP/

    1 Comment
    2023/02/01
    14:07 UTC

    0

    Not a Star Trek Fan

    We don't call him "Number Two" because he's a 💩 POS Star Trek fan, but because his 🍆 is as thick as a #2 ✏️ pencil.

    I just made it up

    1 Comment
    2023/01/31
    16:50 UTC

    11

    If you're ever feeling good about yourself, just take a moment and look in a mirror.

    3 Comments
    2023/01/30
    07:17 UTC

    4

    you are not as good as a kitty

    1 Comment
    2023/01/29
    18:47 UTC

    0

    I do not want to have sex with you

    14 Comments
    2023/01/28
    18:47 UTC

    1

    did you really think that was going to work

    0 Comments
    2023/01/28
    18:41 UTC

    17

    Long insult for copy and pasting onto 6yro reddit posts...

    You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. As they say in Texas. I’ll bet you couldn’t pour !@#$ out of a boot with instructions on the heel. You are a canker. A sore that won’t go away. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you.
    You’re a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon.
    You are a bleating foal, a curdled staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly with the effluvia and offal accompanying your alleged birth into this world. An insensate, blinking calf, meaningful to nobody, abandoned by the puke-drooling, giggling beasts who sired you and then killed themselves in recognition of what they had done.
    I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformation. I barf at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention you smell?
    Try to edit your responses of unnecessary material before attempting to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a nincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it more rapidly.
    You snail-skulled little rabbit. Would that a hawk pick you up, drive its beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you loose to fly briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy pink shame of your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy, convulsing nausea of your own trite, foolish beliefs.
    You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You’re a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won’t have sex with you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot.
    And what meaning do you expect your delusional self-important statements of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have with us? What fantasy do you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake?
    You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral[size] equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a disease, you puerile one-handed slack-jawed drooling meat slapper.
    On a good day you’re a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient
    in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.
    You smarmy lager lout git. You bloody woofter sod. Bugger off, pillock. You grotty wanking oink artless base-court apple-john. You clouted boggish foot-licking twit. You dankish clack-dish plonker. You gormless crook-pated tosser. You churlish boil-brained clotpole ponce. You cockered bum-bailey poofter. You craven dewberry pisshead cockup pratting naff. You gob-kissing gleeking flap-mouthed coxcomb. You dread-bolted
    fobbing beef-witted clapper-clawed flirt-gill.
    You are a fiend and a coward, and you have bad breath. You are degenerate,
    noxious and depraved. I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go away.
    I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid.
    Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid.
    You emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Your writing has to be a troll. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid. Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond
    the laws of physics that we know. I’m sorry. I can’t go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don’t have enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half baked comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of this drivel. Duh.
    The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snipped away most of what you wrote, because, well... it didn’t really say anything. Your attempt at constructing a creative flame was pitiful. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a load of babbling was hardly effective... Maybe later in life, after you have learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have more success.
    True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us ”normal” people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. But we sometimes forget that there are ”challenged” persons in this world who find these things more difficult. If I had known that this was your case then I would have never read your post. It just wouldn’t have been ”right”.
    Sort of like parking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you.
    P.S.:
    You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful, cowardly, deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable, belligerent, opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal, fascistic, bigoted, racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic, brain-damaged, imbecilic, insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame, self-righteous, byzantine, conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent, libelous, bilious, splenetic, spastic, ignorant, clueless, illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb,
    evasive, double-talking, devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative, paternalistic, fundamentalist, dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased, suppressive, controlling, restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim, crazy, weird, dystopic, stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim, unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive, aggressive,
    mind-numbing, arassive, poisonous, flagrant, self-destructive, abusive, socially-retarded, puerile, clueless, and generally NOT GOOD.

    3 Comments
    2023/01/27
    20:46 UTC

    0

    Why are girls allowed listen to metal? They're really stupid! Metal music is for guys only.

    13 Comments
    2023/01/26
    22:38 UTC

    9

    i need some insults for a tree that been dropping leaf around my porch

    7 Comments
    2023/01/25
    01:11 UTC

    6

    An insult for spies.

    u/shelly_luvs_fire is looking for a way to insult a French spy who keeps calling her a robot. Shelly herself is a pyromaniac.

    0 Comments
    2023/01/24
    19:37 UTC

    7

    Maybe one day..

    ..You'll learn to chill the fuck out, Unclench your butthole and and stop skipping your psychiatrist appointments.

    1 Comment
    2023/01/23
    18:46 UTC

    5

    hey your shoe's untied, made ya look

    0 Comments
    2023/01/22
    15:07 UTC

    7

    "can you read" and "Go away"

    On a scale of 1 to 10 how insulting is it to say this to someone online? In particular to someone who's basically trolling you for sport.

    3 Comments
    2023/01/22
    14:24 UTC

    4

    Comeback suggestions for ignorant poster jumping to conclusions

    I made a post making an observations about wokeness in a topic about woke trends.

    Someone accused my response as being woke and triggered and keep my hateful comments to myself, which is totally untrue at all (just making analysis)

    How do I respond along the lines of "don't jump to conclusions before blasting at people"?

    1 Comment
    2023/01/22
    04:42 UTC

    4

    You pilgrim fucker

    It’s because pilgrims don’t shower . Means someone is dirty. 🤣

    0 Comments
    2023/01/21
    09:30 UTC

    11

    My brother broke his tooth recently, and I hate him give me some good insults

    13 Comments
    2023/01/20
    02:50 UTC

    2

    You put the yawn in lasagna

    2 Comments
    2023/01/19
    00:41 UTC

    11

    I am the pack god

    You look like a double dipped chocolate chip cliff lip charcoaled slim jim with a gargamel nose a Mr. Crocker hunchback no fucking feet nine arms 7 stomachs two bald fades your stepdad beats you with a whiffleball bat you curl up in a ball like a autistic bakugon you live a in sopthisticated mudhut your washing machine is a bucket of water you brush your teeth with your grandpas backstracher and floss your teeth with zipline cables, I caught you j***king off in a porta potty with a thanos gauntlet on while your grandma got simultaneously butt fucked by chimpanzees dressed as the wiggles while she was snorting keemstar's cotton gfuel at the back of a toilet seat my guy you are ugly like shit you are a walking glitch at dinner your dad asks you a question and you say ok and start fucking lagging.

    7 Comments
    2023/01/18
    11:07 UTC

    4

    The gap between your iq and ego is a $45 uber

    0 Comments
    2023/01/18
    05:54 UTC

    9

    You're such a disease on humanity. Any vaccine would kill you and leave the virus unchecked.

    0 Comments
    2023/01/18
    00:20 UTC

    19

    You thought Mark Zuckerberg look unhuman but look at Elizabeth Holmes

    check out this image

    3 Comments
    2023/01/17
    04:06 UTC

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