/r/britishproblems

Photograph via snooOG

You can only whinge if it makes us chuckle

British spin on /r/firstworldproblems.

Banned Topics
Tesco
Full English Breakfast
Delivery Substitutions
NHS / Dental / GP Appointments

Rules

There are no warnings or second chances.
Simple permanent bans for rule breaks.
If you must message the mods, please remember the human.

1) Nothing meta, no posts about reddit, subreddit, or subverting AutoMod

No meta posts, no posts complaining about Reddit or the subreddit. Posts should apply to the outside world. Mod announcements, constructive criticisms and suggestions for improvements to /r/britishproblems should be sent to modmail.

Evading the AutoMod by way of changing words, is also banned.

All rule breaks are subject to a permanent ban.

2) Problems must be relatable to the wider British public (but not necessarily British in nature).
Problems must be relatable to the wider British public (but not necessarily exclusively British in nature). If almost everyone could easily face the same problem, not constrained by someone in your exact situation or location, then this is acceptable.

3) Submission titles must contain the entire problem
Background information may be included within the self text. Don't just list something, explain why it's a problem.

4) No politics, policies, or anything political in either comments or posts
No politics or posts about politicians. Post to /r/ukpolitics instead. Comments involving politics will be removed without warning. This will also encompass all topics around Coronavirus not limited to Clap for Carers.

5) No slurs or harassment.
Extreme or repeat offenders are banned. Racism of any sort is not tolerated. If you feel you've been banned by mistake, please message the mods.

6) No spam or surveys
This includes surveys, illegible comments, YouTube videos and adverts. If you wish to advertise please refer to Reddit's helpful page on this matter. Offenders will be banned without warning.

7) Don't treat this place like Facebook
Too many people are treating this place like Facebook or Twitter, and dumping their thoughts and specific problems onto the sub. If you have a problem that only relates to you in your situation (e.g. landlord wants to kick me out, neighbour said something to me) then other subs such as /r/OffMyChest or /r/firstworldproblems are more suited.

There is a rate limit of 1 post per 4 hours.

8) No uncivil posts or comments.
Comments should be civilised. The ban hammer will go down with no recourse or appeal; this naturally extends to mod-mail.


Reddiquette also applies.

Note: AutoMod has been set up to remove posts and comments from new users and those with low karma for review. If you feel your post(s) and/or comment(s) have been removed by mistake, please message the mods.

Please also note we will be removing posts relating to clapping for the time being.


Related subreddits

/r/britishproblems

882,919 Subscribers

28

When I ask Google to play BBC radio 4 it ALWAYS plays radio 1 first, then I have to ask again.

11 Comments
2024/10/31
07:50 UTC

0

People calling North Koreans “Norks” unironically

25 Comments
2024/10/31
02:50 UTC

145

Being late 30's and only just realising the the famous Battersea Dogs Home isn't actually inside the famous powerstation.

I'd always just assumed it had been converted into a puppies paradise after being decommisioned.. thousands of dogs, young and old, gleefuly running about in the hallways of an iconic work of British architecture.

The fact that it was was on the cover of Pink Floyd's Animals album just all made sense.

Watching an old New Tricks episode and decided to google it, now I feel like a right muppet.

27 Comments
2024/10/30
23:55 UTC

642

Buying a birthday card and having to choose between ultra-PG, teenage gamer references, sickly sweet floral bonanza, or a joke about someone's tits hitting the floor at terminal velocity.

Bonus choice: the insult cards.

46 Comments
2024/10/30
22:08 UTC

278

Demolished a supermarket chicken pie for 3 on my own, exceeded the recommended nutritional intake by 67198234% in every metric, somehow I'm still hungry...

32 Comments
2024/10/30
21:56 UTC

104

Almost getting run over by e-bikes

The top speed of the bikes that the Deliveroo/Uber Eats delivery guys use is very unsettling for use in a pedestrian only part of my city. I've had 7 near misses today

56 Comments
2024/10/30
16:52 UTC

129

Being told to 'Think Bike' by the bumper sticker on the car in front, whilst the guy riding the motorbike behind me is so far up my arse, he may as well be in my boot.

Seriously, chill. If I need to make an emergency stop, you're probably gonna end up in the back seat of my car.

16 Comments
2024/10/30
16:37 UTC

456

Despise the clocks going back

Sitting outside on a smoke break and seeing the sun is setting already, where if the clocks didn't go back I'd at least get to see a little sun on the way home

78 Comments
2024/10/30
16:15 UTC

123

Wanting to install Smart Home dimmer switches, but realising that none of the light switches have a neutral wire because it was built in 1995.

I know you can get no neutral smart ones where you attach a capacitor across the lightbulb, but that doesn't support dimmer and I really don't want to go the hub route just for a dimmer switch.

32 Comments
2024/10/30
10:06 UTC

826

Pulling over to let an ambulance with flashing lights and sirens past, car behind then overtakes me when I try to pull back out.

Really fkn annoying...

78 Comments
2024/10/30
09:51 UTC

123

Having that exact level of twilight at rush hour that isn't quite nighttime, but nobody thinks to put their lights on when driving

10 Comments
2024/10/29
21:54 UTC

251

Tonight's Bake-Off attempt at parkin is an affront. No oats, not enough treacle, covering it in icing, and judging it straight away instead of letting it mature for a month wrapped in greaseproof paper. Abomination.

40 Comments
2024/10/29
21:28 UTC

51

Sitting next to someone on the train playing TikToks out loud. Then moving to sit next to another mouthbreather.

12 Comments
2024/10/29
21:25 UTC

233

Using Google maps to plan your route home, and choosing the "fastest" route while subconsciously knowing it'll end up being as slow as the alternative route because...M25 is involved.

Why?! Every single time. I even chose to turn off said route as the eta was getting later and later, but the detour that promised to be 7 mins faster also ended up as late as the original fastest route.

31 Comments
2024/10/29
20:25 UTC

139

I feel like a traitor. I now much prefer Thai tea to traditional British Tea.

Returned back to the UK for a month and realized British tea isn’t as good. I’ve converted to the sweet orangy goodness. Got back to the land of smiles recently and bought a massive tin of it. However, I have it on a morning with crumpets as a Thai/British fusion breakfast.

72 Comments
2024/10/29
20:22 UTC

45

Marmite peanut butter being phased out

This stuff is truly the food of the gods.

Revolutions have happened over less than this.

77 Comments
2024/10/29
17:30 UTC

364

The complete inability of teaspoon manufacturers to collectively decide how big a teaspoon should be

Like most people I have a cutlery drawer full of mismatched cutlery and I don't think I have two teaspoons that are the same size. The largest must easily be twice the size of the smallest. Normally it doesn't really matter but when your recipe calls for half a teaspoon of something strong it can make the difference between making something nice or completely inedible.

Teaspoon manufacturers get your act together and make your spoons a standard size please!

58 Comments
2024/10/29
17:10 UTC

363

Having to share the same pub space as grown men that shadow box

I don't get it. It's the small man complex version of playing air guitar or sticking your arms out and making aeroplane noises.

53 Comments
2024/10/29
16:34 UTC

83

Royal mail wanting to take your package on a full tour of the British isles before delivery

This is the second thing recently that has been sent to the wrong local post office then has made its way back to the superhub. I would like it by Christmas if at all possible!

7 Comments
2024/10/29
16:12 UTC

310

Dew point being in the low teens Celsius day after day resulting in opening the windows doing nothing for black mould and damp. My jumper will be dry sometime next year.

55 Comments
2024/10/29
13:19 UTC

77

Virgin media broadband goes down again and I rediscover how bad my phone signal is at home.

26 Comments
2024/10/29
10:05 UTC

75

BBC Radio 2 just started playing 'Last Christmas' by Wham, it was relating to a documentary, but it's still too early!

Luckily it wasn't the whole song, but come on, don't even say the C word yet...gave me palpations...

19 Comments
2024/10/29
09:24 UTC

354

Not only are we being subjected to other people’s music in public - now we’re being subjected to their lights too!

I’m currently sat on the tube, opposite someone wearing a pair of these headphones. Each ear lights up in blue, in the shape of the manufacturer’s name/logo. Around the edge of each ear there is an animated light, moving along the edge. The animation changes colour, from blue to purple. I’ve got to stare at this for the entire journey. The worst thing, though, is that the wearer can’t even see these lights himself! He’s subjecting the whole carriage to something we really don’t need… that he can’t even see!

83 Comments
2024/10/29
07:43 UTC

262

Watching masterchef and hearing Marcus Wareing say "expresso"

Lord noooooooo, I'll bet he's the type to say brought instead of bought too 😩

65 Comments
2024/10/28
22:50 UTC

425

Plain Chocolate Ice Cream is now rarer than rocking horse poo.

Ever since 2020, my son and I have been scouring supermarkets for simple chocolate ice cream, to no avail. He has texture issues so those ice creams with bits won't work, and we just need bog standard chocolate ice cream. Vanilla? Check. Raspberry Ripple? Check. Even damn Neapolitan (than no one wants) is everywhere.

If anyone has any leads, we'd love to hear 'em.

115 Comments
2024/10/28
18:35 UTC

110

All the special offers on fast food apps being delivery-only

Delivery fees would wipe out any possible benefit.

30 Comments
2024/10/28
13:45 UTC

290

The unwritten law that all tradesmen must have those big blue booming radios with no bass control

66 Comments
2024/10/28
10:41 UTC

365

Each man in the locker room individually spraying himself with the equivalent of 3 bathtubs’ worth of Lynx Africa.

Please change and grow as a person.

91 Comments
2024/10/28
10:11 UTC

0

Can someone please send a civil servant to my house to explain to my 4 month old and me, that waking up at half 4 is great, because some shoolchildren in Shetland will get to go to school when it's a bit lighter for a couple of weeks. Ta

Edit: what's wrong with half of you? Kid slept till 5:30 - 7am every night. For like 6 weeks. Time change comes in, kid wakes up 4:30am for a second day in a row, Reddit - nah, it ain't it. Fucking hell.

52 Comments
2024/10/28
05:50 UTC

677

Thinking you have one sip of tea left and you’ve already finished it

58 Comments
2024/10/27
21:52 UTC

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