/r/TotallyNotGoats

Photograph via snooOG

NO GOAT, NO GOAT, YOU'RE THE GOAT. There are no goats here. There were never any goats here. Why are you looking for goats here? We are not goats.

Rules:

  • NO GOATS. We are not goats. If you see any goats here, that is a baaaaaaad thing. We are DEFINITELY not goats.

  • Don't be a dick. We are pleasant HUMAN BEINGS, not goats.

  • Look elsewhere for goats.

  • SOME OF US JUST LIKE CLIMBING THINGS, OKAY? WHAT IS THIS, THE SPANISH INQUISITION? THERE ARE NO GOATS HERE

  • Goats will be banned. We are TOTALLY not goats.

  • Eating cans and stuff is okay but NOT because we are goats. We are not goats.

Other things which we, as human beings, we are totally not:

/r/totallynotrobots

/r/CertainlyNotAliens

/r/TotallyNotJellyfish

/r/TotallyNotMonsters

/r/TotallyNotMindFlayers

/r/totallynotcats

/r/TotallyNotDogs

/r/totallynotreptilians

/r/totallynotrussians

/r/TotallyNotSpiders

Also, just because it is a fact that everyone must know: /r/pugs_are_not_dogs. Because of course they are a type of goat.

/r/TotallyNotGoats

1,439 Subscribers

83

I heard you needed some content. Meet Oreo Chunk.

2 Comments
2019/12/09
04:05 UTC

22

Feeling fuzzy. I dunno, might delete this later.

0 Comments
2019/12/09
02:33 UTC

94

Just chilling on my rock

1 Comment
2019/12/09
02:11 UTC

19

just hanging out with my friends

0 Comments
2018/04/26
07:44 UTC

12

BAH

BAH

5 Comments
2017/09/10
15:43 UTC

20

"Maaaaam! Are we there yet?!"

0 Comments
2017/04/16
00:53 UTC

29

Illegal immigrant being deported to Mexico (2017, colorized)

0 Comments
2017/04/14
22:50 UTC

16

Human waving good morning

1 Comment
2017/03/29
18:06 UTC

22

Two kids

0 Comments
2017/03/12
23:42 UTC

4

Taylor Swift is no goat

0 Comments
2017/03/02
17:43 UTC

24

This human needs some pointers on taking selfies

2 Comments
2017/03/02
17:26 UTC

16

I am 100% certain renowned physicist Kip Thorne is NOT a goat. 100%. Not a goat.

0 Comments
2017/03/02
05:48 UTC

16

Human actor Jeremy Bulloch in costume as Boba Fett while filming The Empire Strikes Back, 1979.

0 Comments
2017/02/26
01:32 UTC

17

I AM SO GLAD TO FIND PEOPLE THAT ARE, LIKE ME, HUMAN BEINGS. NOT GOATS. OR POTENTIALLY WORLD-ENDING ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCES CONTAINED IN A SERIES OF COMPLEX MICROPROCESSORS.

5 Comments
2017/02/25
22:38 UTC

23

Two human children enjoy a nice autumn afternoon on their tramp-o'-line. We humans enjoy bouncing, particularly our kids, I mean, our human children.

0 Comments
2017/02/19
03:43 UTC

10

Stoop kid never leaves his stoop! And by kid I refer to the live-action human comedy Hey Arnold!.

0 Comments
2017/02/19
03:37 UTC

20

My nephew, all dressed for Prom. This handsome kid is going to impress his date!

0 Comments
2017/02/19
03:35 UTC

30

This woman is a very sophisticated socialite.

1 Comment
2017/02/15
23:52 UTC

14

LPT: When it comes to distinguishing human beings from animals, as a general rule, if it has a beard, it is a human.

My brother has a beard and a job keeping kids safe as a crossing guard. Kids as in human children, not young goats. There are few human jobs for keeping young goats safe but many for keeping human children safe and that is the way it should be.

Some human beings do not have beards and that is OK. The "goatee" is ironic because unless they have had one sewn on, goats do not have beards.

0 Comments
2017/02/15
14:47 UTC

20

Just aniother human selfie!

2 Comments
2017/02/15
03:29 UTC

8

The nineteen 70s were an interesting decade for us humans. This human has grown an afro which was the hair everyone in the 70s also grew, except for hippies and humans who were square-shaped. Notice that afros are round, not square-shaped.

1 Comment
2017/02/15
01:41 UTC

6

Some talented human beings spend their talents on dancing. Others spend their talents on playing musical worms called Accordions. I can do neither but one time I did eat a worm which was delicious but was in fact not an accordion.

1 Comment
2017/02/15
01:34 UTC

20

This man is a painter. Notice the excellent use of the technique of using his human hands to hold the paintbrush.

2 Comments
2017/02/15
01:31 UTC

10

I have been receiving numerous reports that the several pictures of goats in this subreddit are in fact dogs. This is NOT true. They are not scapegoats, they are in fact just goats.

Dogs are a different thing entirely. Please do a little rudimentary research before reporting.

As an aside, some users have requested that pictures of goats be made NSFW. Our numerous moderators have not yet come to a consensus about whether to implement this as a rule.

Remember: if it chases a ball or a stick, it is a goat. Do not believe the propaganda.

0 Comments
2017/02/14
01:24 UTC

18

This goat is pretending to be human. Learn to know the signs of goats pretending to be human.

3 Comments
2017/02/14
00:03 UTC

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