that's the post

I'm old and lucky but a daily drinker. A box of wine a day lately. I've been following this sub for a while and its just time. I want to see what I can become. They say you are stuck emotionally at the age you began drinking so say hello to fourteen year old me .

I might have 10 coke and cokes but IWNDWYT! So many embarrassing memories at weddings. No more.

Started therapy with a substance abuse therapist recently and it's been truly fascinating. I never thought I had a reason why I drank. I just liked it.

I wasn't abused, no PTSD, no trauma or history of SA. I just enjoyed the feeling of being drunk.

What Ive learned is that not only is that not true, but it's what many people think and can keep them stuck in a loop.

For me, there actually are somethings I'd never have connected to my drinking that actually makes total sense. And this realization is actually impacting my cravings a lot. It's not a miracle cure, but I think it's actually working.

If you're on the fence about it, maybe my experience will help! It's so much harder doing this alone.

I am 25 years old guy. I am not exactly destroyed by alcohol but i know it's taking over me. I quit alcohol for almost 6 months but my job started getting very stressful. I begun drinking beers.

I live abroad in a small town and alcohol is a cultural to the country I live in. For socializing I end up going to all the events and drink. I don't want to drink but I'm stressed or bored that I end up drinking to calm myself.

I have been to AA but it doesn't click with me. I find it too boring and unrelatable. I want to stop wanting to want alcohol every time I'm bored. I need something that will make me scared of drinking it again. I don't know what to do.

My only coping mechanism is to drink, otherwise i will be in a panick attack all the time. My so called "friends" dont care and they only liked me when I was healthy and bubbly.

Now I feel like an empty shell. I dont wanna drink but when I dont Im shaking and feeling like im dying, its so hard that I want to scream. Im so ashamed of myself, but also feeling so much hatred for the world.

Im almost out of booze, I only drink wine but I dont think Im able to go outside today. I feel like my brain is partly dead, i dont know how to describe it.

Im laying in bed this whole day, crying without relieve. I just dont know anymore.

I've not had a drink for 3 weeks. I'm struggling today. Switching between coffee and sparkling water. The thing is, I relapsed a few weeks back and had a couple of glasses of wine. I'd been sober 2 weeks at that point. I hated it. Hated the taste. Hated the way it was making me feel. I didn't even finish the bottle I poured it away. And I'm still sitting here on a Saturday feeling bored because I'm drinking coffee and not alcohol.

Slipped yesterday. Shoot. Woke up feeling terrible (of course) and mad at myself. But, I'm in happy that my first thoughts are "You gotta keep staying sober." And "Back to meetings." As opposed to wanting to drink more.

Anytime I slip these days, I just remember how sad and sick that drinking has made me. It stopped being fun many years ago. IWNDWYT.

Since getting sober 100 days ago, at least once a week I’m having dreams about breaking my sobriety for some reason or another. Last night it was to go to a fair with my best friend. I don’t actually witness the drinking moments in my dream just the hangover after and the incredible regret of having to reset my time. The hangovers are getting progressively worse in each dream. Last night I was bedridden and couldn’t get up in my dream. The weird thing is I actually wake up with a phantom hangover which is really disturbing. When I wake up and realize I didn’t drink and the hangover is in my head, I’m so relieved. I think these dreams are keeping me from actually doing it (I’ve had some real thoughts about drinking for upcoming events). I should note I’ve historically been prone to nightmares and weird sleep paralysis events since childhood. Anyone else relate? #IWNDWYT

Hey everyone , I had a bit too many drinks on Wednesday and today being Saturday by anxiety and anger is all time high , how many days does it take to reach a baseline , thanks

This week is wrapping up nicely. And my daily IWNDWYT post has a lot to do with it. Thank you all for your support.

Happy Sober Saturday

1. Better health.
2. Lower risk of heart disease.
3. Reduced blood pressure.
4. Stronger immune system.
5. Clearer thinking.
6. No more hangovers.
7. Save money.
8. Better skin.
9. Lower risk of cancer.
10. More energy.
11. Weight loss.
12. Improved sleep quality.
13. Less stress.
14. Reduced anxiety.
15. Better mood.
16. More focus.
17. No dependency.
18. Improved liver function.
19. Better lung function.
20. No guilt after drinking.
21. Improved relationships.
22. More time for hobbies.
23. Less risky behavior.
24. Better concentration.
25. Lower risk of diabetes.
26. Improved gut health.
27. Reduced risk of depression.
28. More self-confidence.
29. No procrastination.
30. Better life balance.
31. Lower risk of accidents.
32. Better hydration.
33. Improved memory.
34. Better decision-making.
35. No more drunk texting.
36. Fresher smell.
37. Less aggression.
38. No regrets about words or actions.
39. Increased productivity.
40. Lower risk of addiction.
41. No more drunken arguments.
42. Better eating habits.
43. No more hangover headaches.
44. Improved physical fitness.
45. Fewer junk food cravings.
46. Better muscle recovery.
47. Improved sex life.
48. Lower risk of stomach issues.
49. Improved digestion.
50. Reduced risky driving behavior.
51. More freedom.
52. Better decision-making.
53. Less shame.
54. Less dependence on others.
55. Better skincare.
56. Improved emotional balance.
57. Less resentment.
58. Enhanced creativity.
59. Lower risk of heart attacks.
60. Stronger family bonds.
61. Better friendships.
62. No more hangover meals.
63. More control over emotions.
64. Better breathing.
65. Less chance of headaches.
66. Better work performance.
67. Less need for medication.
68. Better posture.
69. Improved appearance.
70. Less acid reflux.
71. Reduced risk of heart failure.
72. Better appetite.
73. Less stress in social situations.
74. No more nausea.
75. Improved gut flora.
76. Better emotional resilience.
77. More focus on goals.
78. More discipline.
79. Better financial situation.
80. Lower risk of brain damage.
81. More control over your life.
82. Less risk of alcohol poisoning.
83. Improved blood circulation.
84. No worries about drunk actions.
85. Improved brain function.
86. Lower chance of pancreas problems.
87. Less fear of failure.
88. Better lung health.
89. Less risk of liver damage.
90. Strengthened willpower.
91. No sagging facial muscles.
92. Increased self-awareness.
93. Less need for drugs.
94. No cravings for alcohol.
95. More time for yourself.
96. Increased motivation.
97. Fewer health concerns.
98. Stronger relationships with loved ones.
99. Better mental well-being.
100. Happier life without alcohol!

I asked ChatGTP for 100 reasons. I’m not disappointed at all haha. This is great! I will print this out and put it on my bedroom door. And next to it I will put a piece of paper with “Reasons to drink alcohol”. But I will leave this paper empty because there a none!👌🏻

Last year we went away to the countryside on the train. We went to a place for lunch near our station. I remember thinking "I need two pints" before the train to function as I'd been drinking all weekend. We went for lunch and I had two strong ciders. It's all I thought about on the walk there. Continued drinking that week. Got the train back feeling shaky and awful.

This time round we went to the same place for a breakfast (wasn't planned). This time we had been running in our local park 2 miles.

This year we didn't think about alcohol once. I had the entire house decorated. I had the money to get a main present that she really wanted but never expected. I had the money to buy all the other little things I wanted to get. I spent two hours making a card picture collage. I had the money and energy to last minute plan a comedy event out in our local city while she was at her mum's. I spent 3 hours wrapping, tidying, organising, decorating.

I am so much more thoughtful sober and have the money and energy to do nice stuff last minute.

I never could have done all this in my drinking days. I'm not constantly thinking "how can I get my next drink??".

Tl;dr: alcohol can diminish the effectiveness of SSRIs for anxiety. I've been overdoing it and I find myself in an anxiety setback after a long time of feeling well. It's disappointing but I wonder if I abstain, will it help the Prozac function better for me over time?

Hello, I have panic disorder, which, at its worst, can be one of the most hellish, slow moving recoveries if you resist it. Anyway, been on Prozac for awhile and at 40 mg, I was feeling awesome--like how I imagine many other people feel throughout their days. I have never been so contented in my life. I still have a lot of therapeutic behaviors and cognitive skills I've learned that help the bulk of it--but prozac makes it just more tolerable so I can move with anxiety if i have to.

Suddenly, I was saying yes to everything, whereas before I would like sit and contemplate and torture myself over whether or not I wanted to go somewhere. "Sure, I'll go to your party," "Oh, its Ladies Night? Let's have four martinis and a couple beers" or "Come on over and we will have some burgers and watch the game and drink a 12 pack"

Then came last weekend. I took my husband out for his birthday. I mean, we drank the fucking town dry. Passed out on the floor, ping pong walking, no memory kind of drunk.

My nonexistent anxiety FLOODED back. I mean, to the point where I was having those insane "I need to go to the hospital" kinds of fears. I am still struggling with it throughout the week but I am doing my therapies and going out and trying to work my way back to recovery again.

I am almost afraid to drink now and I'm considering hitting pause for a few weeks. Thanks in advance for any insights you can provide.

Who else here gets crazy anxiety when drinking coffee after a night of even moderate alcohol intake?

I read about people that drink coffee to kill the hangover. If I have even 3 beers the night before, a cup of coffee destroys me. It makes me a complete wreck. I’ve even experienced depersonalization after too much caffeine: imagine seeing the world like you’re watching it on tv.

But, this morning I could enjoy my mug. I’ll get a little jittery but it’s so much better.

After 1 month I will continue the streak, it's just the first "milestone".

I have been looking forward to doing sober October for a while.

I went golfing with friends yesterday and one of them bought some extra beers and asked if I wanted one. It should’ve been so easy to just say no but I didn’t. I ended up drinking 3 beers. Surprising I didn’t spiral and continue drinking all day like I normally would.

I just feel so embarrassed and ashamed of myself. A few of my friends and family members have said “I knew you could last you only made it 3 days” and they’re right.

I probably won't say it out loud to my friends or family but had to take a minute to celebrate with you all here - pretty sure I wouldn't have made it this far without this community. I've posted a couple of times, but have been here lurking and reading your stories literally every day.

Another thing that's helped me a lot is finding a Smart Recovery meeting group that I've really clicked with. Last week I laughed to myself a little. I was thinking about them being a great group of people and the thought popped into my head that it would be fun to go grab a beer with them some time. I guess my fucked up ingrained neural pathways remain fucked up and ingrained. Maybe it's like laughing at a funeral, I don't know.

Regardless, I won't drink with them (or you) today.

Every damn day! Just a little bit better each day. Quitting drinking is a dream come true!

Today, I’m one year sober. A year ago, I was sitting in Whistler, BC, at lunch with my family—my parents, kids, and husband. I did what I always did: ordered the strongest IPA on the menu. Everyone was horrified because the night before, I had put on another scene. Vacation had given me my usual excuse to drink as much as possible, and I took it. I drank six 21-ounce glasses of IPA, vomited in the restaurant in front of strangers, and made a scene.

My parents took the kids and left me with my husband, who, as usual, tried to let me have my fill to avoid a fight. But I started one anyway—telling him I wanted a divorce, calling him useless, and then stumbling off alone, so drunk I couldn’t walk in a city I didn’t know. My dad had to drag me back, kicking and screaming in front of the kids. So, when I ordered another beer at lunch the next day, everyone was exhausted. I acted like nothing happened, as I often did.

But here’s the thing—that night wasn’t even close to my worst. That episode, as embarrassing as it was, was mild compared to the kind of nights I’d regularly had for the better part of a decade. I had been blacking out almost every other night for ten years. I have no idea how many things my husband has seen, dealt with, or forgiven that I don’t even remember. The texts I’ve sent, the things I’ve said, the opportunities I’ve squandered—the trauma I’ve inflicted. What I do remember are the hangovers. The humiliation. The self-loathing. The couch-potato days that followed, where I hated myself so deeply I couldn’t function.

But that day in Whistler, something shifted. I didn’t finish my beer. I got on a plane the next day, went home, and never drank again.

Why did it stick this time?

I’m not entirely sure. I’ve tried to quit so many times before. Maybe it stuck because I had failed so many times and had finally hit my limit. Maybe it was because I started working out. Maybe it was just my time. I wish I had a clear answer, but I don’t. What I do know is that since I stopped drinking, almost nothing bad has happened to me. When I was blacking out all the time, it felt like bad things were a constant. It turns out alcohol was creating the chaos. Who would’ve guessed?

One year later, how are things?

Everything is better. I don’t miss the hangovers, the anxiety, the bloated face, or the unproductive, lazy version of myself who couldn’t stand to face the world. I’m in the best shape of my life, and I almost never think about drinking anymore. Sure, I miss the chaos sometimes. I’ll miss the feeling of that first drink forever—the signal to relax in a way I haven’t quite replaced. And I know I’m still a beginner in this sober life. My drinking started when I was 17, and now in my 30s, I’m trying to figure out who I am without alcohol.

But today, I’m humble, grateful, and cautious. I’m one year sober, and that’s something I never thought I’d be able to say.

I bought 2. One to keep track of doggos wife and I see driving around in public & the other I hung on my headboard to use nightly before bedtime to signify that I made it thru another day.

It feels crazy that it’s been a year. Time is a funny thing. I feel so amazing about it. Life has still been incredibly challenging, but I’m able to face it and deal with it instead of ignoring all of my problems and hiding from the world and isolating.

I’m healthier and in better physical shape than I’ve ever been in my entire life and I’m 39 years old. I started going to the gym at the beginning of the year (for the first time ever) and it has done wonders for my confidence and mental health. I sometimes catch myself in the mirror like “wow… I can’t believe I got here”. It’s been really nice hearing from friends about how great I look now. My sister told me to stop getting so hot because it’s making her look bad 😂

I was such a mess for so many years of my life. I’ve almost died more times than a person should, and honestly wanted to. I feel lucky to be here and incredibly grateful for the support I had to get here. Finally realizing I couldn’t do it alone and asking for help was the best decision I’ve ever made. I spent 46 days in rehab last October/November. And the way my friends and family have supported me is something I don’t know how to repay besides trying to pay forward support to others.

There’s so much help out there if you need it. And you are not alone. One thing that has helped me maintain this is finding sober communities like AA/NA and building closer relationships with other sober people I know. This sub has been a wonderful place I still visit. It’s been good finding people who understand. If I can get here, I hope it helps others see that they can too. Much love to you all.

I'm lucky, within the realm of being unlucky. Never went to jail, never got a DUI, never lost my job, and my wife stuck with me. But I realized that at this point in my 40's, I had to choose between willfully living and passively dying.

Drinking 6-18 light beers in a day, literally 24x7x365, was something I realized would never be sustainable, nor would it help with the other goals I've been starting to work on during the past year. It wasn't always like this, but during the pandemic (and WFH) it was able to become that way. Prior attempts to taper or quit cold turkey failed. I have nothing against AA because it obviously works for some people, but I tried multiple groups and didn't find it helpful for ME, at least back when I was drinking every day. I'd consider trying again sober.

So, I made an appointment with my longtime PCP for some kind of unrelated minor ailment, and when I got there I told them the truth, for the first time. I laid it all out, aka my past, my behavior, my thought process. I had already done the research, so I asked for disulfiram and/or naltrexone. I asked for a liver panel. I told them that I wanted to know how badly I had screwed up so far, because I don't want to screw up anymore.

Exam was normal, regular bloodwork was normal. AST was in the 140's and ALT in the 220's. I was relieved that the ratio was promising, but I can't take naltrexone until the numbers improve. Started the disulfiram. Managed to get through the withdrawal period with zero complications. The cravings are killing me, but I am allowing myself to eat whatever I want on a temporary basis to help suppress them. Drinking lots of LaCroix.

So here I am, raw-dogging life. Let's go.

My last drink (and THC gummy) was on September 17th. A day before I went to the hospital for a mental health crisis. During the nearly ten day long visit, I finally realized that I had been using those substances to cope with my unregulated anxiety and depression.

But now I have a therapist and medicine for the first time in my life. And with lots of accountability actions being implemented, I finally have clarity in my short life. Even realized that I’m only two years older than my dad when he started our family. My life is just beginning!

I don’t regret all the fun times I had in my 20’s. Made lots of friends as well as mistakes. But I think my positivity and good fortune that I didn’t end up in drug court or prison will help others find clarity in their own lives.

Alcohol and weed do help some people, in moderation. Just not me.

Glad I found the courage to finally make a post in this subreddit. Take care! :)

I am a 22 year old male who has wanted to pretty significantly cut down the amount of alcohol I drink for over a year now. On a personal level, i have succeeded. I very rarely drink when I’m alone or at home even with family who might be having a drink, but I am struggling with my social life as a result of this.

I struggle to find things to do that don’t involve alcohol. Like I said before, I am 22 so most of what my friends want to do is just go out until early hours of the morning and drink. I’m getting very tired of this. I like going to sports games and concerts, but It’s not really feasible for me to always go to an event every time I want to see my friends.

Idk how to hangout anymore. I feel so weird for not wanting to drink. I want to go out and do stuff, but what? Maybe I need a new hobby or group to join? I’ve gotten into fitness, specifically endurance sports, but seeing as how this is mostly a solo sport, it’s not really proving to be a friend maker or something that is very social at all.

I had went to rehab and got sober for a couple months, have been on a bender for the last couple, and think I'm ready to get back to being healthier. Posting here bc I know I can't do this alone 🫶🏻

I’ve been sober 29 days and every evening when I get home from work I just want to go to bed. I still can’t find enjoyment from anything. I was 100% sure my depression was from alcohol but now I’m second guessing myself.

On a more positive note I feel really blessed to have finally quit. I drank hard every night for the last decade and I finally did what I thought was impossible. For years I just wanted to go a day without alcohol and now I’m almost a month sober. The benefits of sobriety are amazing and I will NEVER go back. So for now I’ll just have to enjoy my morning gym time and not feeling like death everyday.

Can I get a nice?

Genuinely so thankful for this sub. Reading other’s shares and insights have been so helpful for me. Have a great day everyone! IWNDWYT 🩷

Maybe we just can't handle it all at once, maybe it's not all black or white. Having a 2 shots in the morning is not as bad as having a bad personality all day?

I've had a bad benders as a disclaimer, sometimes I can handle it, would you recommend it? It's not all black and white always.