Hi all,

6 days ago I had the worst hangover of my life and realised that it was actually withdrawals. My heart was pounding so hard it felt like it was looking for another owner 😂. I shat so much it still hurts... I was shaking and dry heaving and I realised I am killing myself slowly.

Been binge drinking for years, doing dumb stuff like having pointless arguments, waking up drunk and pissing on the floor, using hangovers as an excuse to do absolutely nothing all week, living my life in a haze and missing out on important bonding time with my husband, cats and friends. Haven't worked in a year due to burn out and depression. Six days ago it finally clicked, I've drank myself into utter despair and it's time to STOP. If I want to heal I need to stop drinking, not the other way around. The drinking is causing my pain, its not helping me whatsoever. Not drinking won't solve everything, but it's a damn good start.

Two days ago we got the news that my partner is terminally ill and even though my partner doesn't want to know, I know he most likely hasn't got a year to live. He's got heavy chemo and immunotherapy ahead and I know he's gonna be miserable. I just can't drink anymore. I get nasty and lazy when I drink, he doesn't deserve that and I should be eternally grateful he ever put up with my behaviour at all. I decided that I no longer want to waste my/our precious time together drowning myself in poison to avoid dealing with my feelings. The news weighs heavy on my heart, but drinking won't help me get through this, it's only gonna add oil to the fire.

Tonight he's gonna go out with friends and family while I stay at home. Usually that would be my excuse to drink all day and night since there is no one to hold me accountable.

Tonight I'm gonna treat myself to crappy food, videogames and maybe an energy drink like I used to when I was 15. Tomorrow I'm gonna be 100% fine and spend the day with my favourite person on earth, not hungover, less depressed, having slept better than I have in years. Maybe I'll bake him an apple pie or make his favourite lunch, I got time to prepare tonight since I won't be drinking. I forgot I loved cooking, the next beer always seemed so much more important.

I've spend much more time with my cats too, I can see they're starting to lean on me more, even after just 6 days. I've seriously let them down too. No more.

So done with this poison, I have let it destroy a lot but I'm not gonna let it take my relationship, my home and my life.

I will not drink with you today.

hello

I quit drinking about 6 weeks ago. Admittedly I’m probably sensitive to this, but man…

I’m noticing how alcohol is this constant backdrop to most television shows I watch.

For example, I’m watching this series “Nobody Wants This”. Overall, a delightful rom com…but these characters are CONSTANTLY drinking in the show. Like, afternoons, evenings, at basketball games…Stressed out? Drink. Celebrating? Drink. Hanging out for brunch? Drink. Visiting Mom? Drink. Repeat, repeat, repeat.

If you actually drank as much these characters you would likely have a problem. But here in TV Land it’s just like this charming thing attractive 30-somethings are always doing any time of any day. So fancy!

Is Netflix just like bank rolled by the broader alcohol industry or something? It’s not even any specific brand or product placement, it’s just the massive presence of alcohol to try and normalize abusive behaviors. Feels like lobbying, if I’m being honest.

What’s the best advice you have either heard or personally received to help motivate you to stop drinking. Mine is ‘get out of your own damn way’. Always an issue for me to be too much in my head and also sabotaging to feel like it’s out of my control. I finally decided that I am not going to be the one that is preventing progress.

I'm newly sober and traveling to the UK for work. Any best practices on how to not drink while traveling? I've glorified drinking in Europe since I was a teen... thinking it would be great to have pints on pints in an old English pub and nervous Ill convince myself "well I am in England."

I've found some local online meetings I plan on attending. Not sure what else to do.

Seems like a noteworthy number. And yesterday, for the first time in a long time, the “I should have one just to prove I can have one and it’s no big deal” thought crept in. Then I had a shit day and all the podcast and lit stuff came to mind - it will put cortisol into imbalance, it will mess with hormones, it’ll make recovery from a bad day harder. Whyyyyy would I want to do that to myself? Fuck the booze, friends. Let’s solder on.

I've done that stop for 2 months, fall off the wagon, stop for 2 weeks, did stoptober which lasted a couple of days. Needless to say, this is not going very well.

The smoking book (easyway). I used to smoke hash (I'm that old) when I was at 6th form. I then used to smoke the tobacco after running out of hash and got addicted to smoking. I used to properly smoke. Get up, have a coffee and a cigarette, drive to work, have a cigarette. Have break (teacher) walk off site, have a smoke, lunchtime, the same, get in the car at 3pm and light up. Go to the pub with my mate smoke smoke smoke.

Once I ran out of money and I had to read the book. I sat in the shed with a kettle, some milk and coffee. I read it cover to cover and 3/4 of the way thought, I was just like "I don't smoke anymore". It was a revelation. I just haven't smoked since. I am still a smoker, even though I haven't had a cigarette in 15 years. All it takes would be one, then the occasional one, then the wake up coffee and cigarette pattern. I think you have got one go at the smoking book and it will 100% work, but it probably won't work a second time.

I lost my job (not drinking related) and I need to get a grip. Drinking in the evenings has become quite a thing again. Yesterday, I got my fast car out and went for a blast to the city, I parked up and went and bought 2 books. How to ADHD (because I am living by myself and currently in task paralysis!) and the Allen Carr stop drinking.

I'm going to have a few beers tonight per usual, but tomorrow, I'm going down the shed with a box of tins and I'm going to read the drinking book cover to cover.

I hope it's like the smoking book.

I will come back on here after I've read it and tell you how I got on.

As with the smoking book, you have to read it cover to cover (I think). Your addict brain doesn't really want you to read it. But you have to. My mate is still smoking years on and it's as simple as he doesn't really want to stop. He was the one who lent me the smoking book.

Here's to the drinking book. Cheers!

Fatigued, can’t concentrate, feel overwhelmed by absolutely anything but sitting still 😵‍💫

I post one or more of these each year. It's a term I heard in an AA meeting a long time ago - and it is so true.

Emotions, feelings, FAMILY, for those of us in the northern hemisphere days are getting much shorter and colder, and never forget the power of the ghost of dysfunction past.

In the united states we have an election that, no matter which side you are on, has blood pressure up, emotions on knife edge and teeth clenched. This is difficult for those of us who are used to numbing our feelings...

If that is not enough we may be subject to the tentacles of family functions reaching out, are you coming for Thanksgiving dinner? Have they forgotten that uncle Ed did seven inappropriate things last year, that the questions you do not want to answer will be asked fifteen times, and then there is the menu, the forced gaiety, the necessity of sitting next to your brother who really should be in jail.

All the while christmas is warming up. Oh fuck. More on this and New Years in a subsequent post. But yeah Hurricane Season.

In AA there is a tradition of what are called ALCATHONS - essentially back to back meetings - sometimes around the clock to offer a refuge -You can find these by calling the local hotline. Slip out of your own crazed setting - find a meeting and maybe go home with what was formerly a stranger you don't have to be in AA to go,

OR you can start your own. Any safe place any family of your own choosing will do.

Above all you don't have to drink. Whatever it takes even if that means disappointing your mother - again.

I have been trying to get sober for a while, but so far it hasn't stuck.

After a heavy night of drinking on Thursday, and feeling like death all day yesterday, I've decided to try again. Today is day 2, and I've been reading through this subreddit all morning while trying to come up with a plan to succeed this time. I know today is not the hardest day for me: I usually give in to that first glass of wine around day 5 or day 6. I am desperately hoping to make it past the one week point and into the double digits this time.

Reading on here has been a big help, just knowing I'm not alone and seeing everybody's strength. Thank you!

An extensive period of anorexia with just alcohol did some major electrolyte damage. Long story short, I’m in the ICU and November 1, is my new clean date.

Anybody else having wild dreams all of a sudden? Im just waking up on the morning of day 4 for me, and last night and the night before I have had the most intense (mostly positive) dreams in the longest time. Pretty cool.. feel like I’m in the movie inception haha

One friend for instance, made a judging look when I said I'll have alcohol free beer.

Another day, at a house party, a friend poured vodka into my alcohol-free beer and told me "you HAVE to drink, it's Halloween" even though I had said no at least 3 times.

At this point I also slipped, and said fuck it, I'll drink. And then he kept making me drink more and more even when I didn't want to. It was in a friendly way. He is not evil. But I don't understand why people behave this way and how to handle this situation. Next morning, I realize I did not enforce my boundary.

Any tips on how to enforce my boundary in social situations like this? I really wanna quit drinking for good (not just reduce).

I made it to 3 weeks alcohol free after decades of daily drinking. But these kinds of social situations were when I keep relapsing.

No drink for 3 weeks.

Better sleep but still very tired and a bit scatty and all over the place.

I'm keeping things clean and easing myself back into excersise to fill my time.

Going to wash the car this morning and commit to not drinking today.

Have a good weekend folks. X

Day 11 here. I am in recovery from the above. Doing very nicely if I do say so myself. If I still relate to the language of recovery for the rest of my life that will be okay.

So. The only slips I have had in the last several years have involved alcohol.

I guess I just figured out one more reason to maintain my sobriety.

Looking back, it has been my "mistakes" that have opened my eyes to who I really am in the eyes of God. Truly grateful for my mistakes that have made me right sized.

We may be anonymous strangers on the internet, but we have one thing in common. We may be a world apart, but we're here together!

Welcome to the 24 hour pledge!

I'm pledging myself to not drinking today, and invite you to do the same.

Maybe you're new to /r/stopdrinking and have a hard time deciding what to do next. Maybe you're like me and feel you need a daily commitment or maybe you've been sober for a long time and want to inspire others. It doesn't matter if you're still hung over from a three day bender or been sober for years, if you just woke up or have already completed a sober day. For the next 24 hours, lets not drink alcohol!

This pledge is a statement of intent. Today we don't set out trying not to drink, we make a conscious decision not to drink. It sounds simple, but all of us know it can be hard and sometimes impossible. The group can support and inspire us, yet only one person can decide if we drink today. Give that person the right mindset!

What happens if we can't keep to our pledge? We give up or try again. And since we're here in /r/stopdrinking, we're not ready to give up.

What this is: A simple thread where we commit to not drinking alcohol for the next 24 hours, posting to show others that they're not alone and making a pledge to ourselves. Anybody can join and participate at any time, you do not have to be a regular at /r/stopdrinking or have followed the pledges from the beginning.

What this isn't: A good place for a detailed introduction of yourself, directly seek advice or share lengthy stories. You'll get a more personal response in your own thread.

This post goes up at:

• US - Night/Early Morning

• Europe - Morning

• Asia and Australia - Evening/Night

A link to the current Daily Check-In post can always be found near the top of the sidebar.

Thank you for having me as your DCI host this week!

If you have at least 30 days of sobriety and would like to take a turn at hosting, reach out to u/SaintHomer and he will set you up. It's an easy and rewarding way to serve this amazing community of sober warriors.

IWNDWYT 😻

I am so happy for everyone that talks about how happy they are and how better their life became. But I don't feel the same. I feel like a completely different person. Before I drank I had joy. and love. and so many emotions that just came so naturally to me. But it's all gone. I feel things but it feels like it's all secondary to me craving something more. I used to find joy in social interactions, in all parts of life, but now I just wait out the time until I can go to sleep.

Yes I am sober. Have been since June this year. but I expected to be the person I was, and I'm not. I wish people talked about it more.

26f, 33 days in, the longest i’ve gone since my 21st birthday. at this point i don’t think i will drink ever again. i feel so much better! pandemic times were quite rough in terms of my addiction.. looking back at pictures today from the times i was at my most sick and unable to stop, i know i never want to feel that way again. So now i feel great most of the time, but the last week or so ive developed an inability to sleep much. i’ve always been a heavy, long-hours sleeper. usually unable to get myself out of bed without significant effort, even before i was in active addiction. but now after quitting im starting to wonder, did alcohol keep me sleepy? probably, but another factor is im having the same amount of caffeine per day as i was when i was drinking almost daily. at that point it didn’t really seem to affect me much, but now its starting to feel like way too much when i have no hangover to push through, so ive cut back a little. Still, i am facing this issue of insomnia so im hoping that the highly regarded “better sleep” after quitting will find me soon.

Hi folks i hope you are all well and healthy and in good comfort.

I have been living in South East Asia for the last few years, after moving from a western country.

What I like about SEA is the availability of bubble tea in many flavours. I have come to love bubble tea I drink it everyday (Lychee Green Tea my fave). They are so refreshing and make me feel good.

Another thing I love about SEA is that alcohol is not in your face all the time (apart from South Korea/Japan). In thailand, the tourist and expats are the biggest drinkers.

I love my bubble tea, it is one of the things i look forward to now. If you are in a place that has bubble tea, give it a try - it is way better than coffee much more pleasant and quenches your thirst.

Does anybody have any particular activities they do to relieve stress or relax? Could be anything. I'm thinking in terms of treats to yourself I suppose to help with getting/staying away from alcohol.

So, my first sober night again. I couldn’t fall asleep for hours. My heart was racing, and I kept feeling like someone was in my apartment - straight out of a horror movie. Disfigured faces flashed in my mind, shadows lurking around the corner, someone standing just outside my window. Grim faces. I was scared.

I got up and noticed some neighbors were still awake. For some reason, it always comforts me to see lights on late at night, just knowing there’s someone nearby, that help would be close if I needed it.

Eventually, I fell asleep, but the horror didn’t stop.

My dreams were gruesome and vivid, somehow tied to alcohol. Specifically, I dreamed about the damage I feared it had already done, or what I might become. My brain was nothing but a sponge, stripped of all cognitive ability after years of drinking. I was unrecognizable, and everyone I loved was in pain, standing beside me, helpless.

I really hope this gets better and those dreams were not what my future holds.
Has anyone had similar experiences?

As a disclaimer, I’m also taking Wellbutrin/Bupropion, which I’ve heard can increase the likelihood of vivid dreams.

Tonight can f right off and go to hell. I'm honestly posting this super tired but I gotta vent somewhere and this is the safest place I know. I've abstained from a drink so far but holy crap if I had an excuse tonight's it.

Our dog was anemic and we were working on treatment. Went to the vet earlier today to get meds, vet checked and we had no idea root cause. Poor guy was breathing heavy, on and off deep breaths abdomen to chest then panting, and finally just... Went.

I work from home and we got him when he was a few months old. This happened young (he didn't hit 3) and I feel like a horrible owner even though our vet assured us we didn't cause it or do anything wrong. But holy F! do I feel awful. Did I pick him up wrong at one point today to help him on the couch or in the car? Was this inevitable? Could this have been prevented? So many unknowns....

Honestly I need a place to vent as I said above and this is just the safest with people who get it. I feel like I have every right to drink. Hell, I think I deserve it after today. My best friend died in my arms.... Ugh please just think of or pray or send good vibes or whatever for me, my wife, and our daughter... Me for drinking and emotional well-being, the wife for well-being, and it's our daughter's first close brush with dealing with death.... Thankfully she was asleep when everything happened so she didn't have to witness everything, but I'm not looking forward to the morning conversation.

I'm rambling at this point. His name was Sokka (after AtLA) and a husky. Not quite 3. I hate typing/saying that. Please though, I need some random Internet backup. It's bedtime here and about to fall asleep holding my wife, but damn... Tonight is hard because I'm the one who's always up later. Tomorrow is hard because working with family. The rest..... Well F. I got a long period here to work through. Death was always a long trigger for me.

.... Fk. Thanks for reading my ramble. Cheers mates, I'm off to bed.

It has been over 2 years for me. I am going on a cruise with family and I wonder... Could I have a drink? Not drink package but ... Drink here and there? On one hand I'm SO proud of 2 years with not a drop but on the other hand.... I haven't been on a vacation and I feel like maybe I could just try to be a normal person for this week and allow a few beverages? Thoughts? Anyone have a vacation allowance?

Edit: it's 5 weeks away. I've been pondering this for months but it's getting close...

Got pretty drunk last night and felt like i was being annoying so kept apologizing to everyone for being annoying and I think I also made my boyfriends roommate uncomfortable or annoyed with me which exacerbated the fact that he’s already annoyed at how often I am over at the house. My boyfriend has a bit of a drinking issue as well so it’s this cyclical dance of drinking back and forth and I want to be the first to set the better example.

I miss feeling clarity and I absolutely abhor the guilt and pity feelings after a night of drinking and last night was a rough one. My boyfriend chose to go out tonight and I decided to stay in and enjoy the second rain of the season, although going out was tempting. I’ve already drained so much money I cannot afford to drain the last couple weeks by buying Ubers and alcohol.

Also getting a new very serious job as a behavior tech for kids with disabilities at schools and I do NOT want any of my work to be tainted by my unhealthy vice or weakened mind and body.

I’m just here to clear my mind and also to say that this is a full day of sobriety today on November 1st and I can’t wait to wake up tomorrow feeling clear and not heavy.

(My hangovers last a full 24 hours even if I take a nap, whether it be feeling sick, or just tired and heavy and unmotivated.)

IWNDWYT ✌🏻

Sometimes I think I'm not as fun anymore because I wake up early at 7am and then I want to go to bed at 8pm. My sleep quality is better now but I have the lingering feeling that I'm not any fun because I go to bed early now and I can't stay out that long. I've been invited to several events after 7pm and I'm like nah, I'm tired.

It's an internal monologue because no has ever told me that" I'm not fun because I don't drink or stay out late." Ive just noticed that my body is naturally tired if I dont drink.

I guess I need to fight the voice. I also stopped other things all at the same time including weed, caffeine and smoking. I always say you gotta go big or go home🤣🤣

With Christmas stuff on the shelves already and knowing that it's fast approaching my anxiety rises so badly.. This time of year fills me with dread anyway, but the last couple of years that I have stayed sober for months prior to Christmas Eve I have then caved and drank when everybody comes over with alcohol. I do not want to do that this year.. I'm scared I will though. I wish I could avoid Christmas entirely, it really stresses me out 😔

How did u get over the not being able to sleep with out drinking?

I’ve been sober for over nine years now. I love coming to this community and seeing the phenomenal support for each other. Thank you for being there for me and each other. Love you guys!

I have seen a few posts about taking a break from drinking (usually for a month) in order to reset drinking habits. The goal seems to be starting over as a controlled or moderate drinker.

FWIW I have taken such breaks a few times by giving up alcohol for Lent.

I started off drinking less afterwards but it quickly escalated. There I was right back where I began.