I used to be so worried about being the best at my job

How people would perceive me if I couldn’t figure something out, fix the jet, etc

I would be so hard on myself

(This was mostly when I first got in)

Well fast forward, on the cusp of leaving, I’ve realized what all that motivation has gotten me.

Because I put all that pressure on myself, I did eventually become very good at my job. And what do I get for it?

Getting put on all the complicated, time consuming troubleshooting,

Having to stay late every day,

Have to answer for everyone on my shift,

Get treated differently than other people of the same rank as me, held to a different standard etc.

What do they give me in return?

More pay? Bette position? Getting home on time?

Nope! Stay late and fix something else someone fucked up.

Then they will give me a coin, an award, that ends up in some old shoebox in my closet… I don’t care about that. Why am I paid the same as my mouthbreathing peer who moves at the pace of a snail.

I’ve stopped trying. I’m not going to be the go to guy anyone. I’m going to be just as slow / clueless as everyone else. We all get paid the same.

One of my chiefs asked why I’m getting out as I’m a “good ____ troop, which is hard to find”

And I say “exactly. So I’m going to use that motivation and grit elsewhere for better opportunities.”

Luckily he just said, “can’t argue with that” and didn’t go on some lecture.

Wish I realized this 3 years ago and not when I’m about to get out

Just needed to rant.

It is just me or are most people in the military just really weird, rude, or have some sort of personality disorder? I have not had one good connection since i've been in. Their crazy always comes out.

So obviously, things are getting pretty hairy across the globe and it could theoretically be any day now that we’re called into some war I would imagine most people here don’t want to participate in. Personally, I have less than two months left before I start terminal leave and I couldn’t be more ready to gtfo. However, I have a feeling, knowing my luck, that I’ll get stop-lossed and have to serve longer than I signed for. Does anyone have a plan for how they are going to get the hell out if/when this stop loss happens? I know some people here have a decent bit of time left on their contracts and would be stuck serving if a war were to be started/escalated by the U.S. sometime soon. Frankly I’m not opposed to going scorched earth and self reporting as a weed enjoyer or playing the suicidal card.

I’m separating in a couple of months after a shitty 5 years of naval service and have been thinking of moving to another country down the line. How easy is it for a veteran to move somewhere outside the US?

Hey, I’m the person who self-reported eating a weed gummy two months ago, with the intention to get out the Navy. This will be my last update for at least a while.

I signed my Adsep notification yesterday! I’m receiving a General Discharge (UHC). This is not a “bad” discharge, and an Honorable from my previous contract means I’m still going to apply for the GI Bill. I’ll get everything else regardless.

Legal didn’t have a clear sep date, but I was told “these things move quick” and to be ready for next month. I’m currently in TAPS (a class that prepares you to separate).

I did go through DRB and XOI, but after I submitted a sappy apology statement to the CO, he had a meeting with me explaining he doesn’t want to punish a self-report. But his hands were tied due to Big Navy policy and he’s just separating me with no NJP. Although I tested negative, they have to separate you off the statement alone.

I was referred for substance abuse screening and they determined I’m not addicted, but each CO decides whether or not they care about that determination. Mine didn’t. The lady at mental health confirmed my fears, and why I didn’t go the mental health route in the first place. She didn’t believe my story and belittled my reasons for being depressed and turning to drugs to cope. But it doesn’t matter, she can’t prove her suspicions and ultimately I still came out on top. Nobody in my chain has given me a hard time about this.

But they did move me out of classified spaces, a note for anyone who wants to keep their clearance. I don’t care personally as I hate government work. Might have to pay back some of my bonus but it’s worth it for my freedom. I have adequate savings

My mental health has done a complete 180 just knowing I’m getting out. My friend is letting me move in with them while I do college. Very hopeful

I took a HUGE gamble with this, and I was lucky it played out well in my INDIVIDUAL case. I don’t recommend this as anyone’s first attempt at getting out

Here for any questions. Thanks to this sub, and I wish you all luck in getting out/coping with the military!

Anyone on here smart on what the AF IRR looks like. For context, did like 11 years AD, now in the reserves for another year and a half. Getting conflicting info from Google…

TIA

I’m getting chaptered chapter 13. I’ve cleared sfl tap, cif, did phase 1 and 2 physical. Co has signed off, legal has signed off, bc has signed off. Now… we wait. My psg says I should get orders in a week or two and be out by holiday block leave. The anticipation is killing me. I’ve never hated somethin so much in my life as I do being in the army. Hoping PSGs timeline is correct

This is a vent post about me being a dumbass. I was pretty set on med school for the longest time, then I got cold feet in college and decided I wanted to pursue my childhood dream of becoming a pilot like my grandpa. I had the perfect resume for med school or grad school, I had lots of friends and family, and I come an asian community (not many in the navy).

So I go on this quest to get into flight school convinced it will help me reinvent myself. Now I’m in it and I just had the worst flight of my life and it’s just making me ruminate on everything. It seems like everyone around me feels a way about this that I don’t? It’s not that I’m not excited to be here, but I they have this drive where this is all worth the pain we go through. Me I question if I could have put this effort into something else.

On top of that I’m lonely on the other side of the country, it seems like everyone around me is already friends with each other, I go to work, gym, study, sleep. I have acquaintances here and there but that’s it. I miss my family, and no matter how long I’m in this godforsaken city it seems I will never be able to call it home. Yeah a lot of it is a me problem.

I don’t want to quit because I know I’m just having a bad day. The navy is exactly what I thought it would be, I knew it would be hard, but not a day since ocs goes by where I don’t wake up with some regret about the things and people I left behind. What if things could have been different if I never joined? I could have swallowed the regret of not pursuing this and moved on with my life. I also wonder do I have the mental health for this? Everyone else seems to handle things fine why do I freak out the first time I fuck up.

I remember back in 2007 realizing I clearly didn’t belong and my old beliefs quickly changing. I didn’t have a single friend and most people there hated me. I openly stated I didn’t want to be there and would frequently say controversial things hoping to get kicked out. I spent a ton of time online bashing the US government and finding people that wanted to join and trying to stop them. One time I made a girl cry because I intentionally let an American flag touch the ground during a stupid ceremony I wanted nothing to do with.

I even refused military discounts at stores and argued with them telling them I should pay the full price. I don’t know how many countless random people such as cashiers or waitresses that I would bring up how much I hated the navy and I only haven’t left because I would go to prison.

I remember when told the base therapist how much I hated everyone because they were stupid hateful rednecks and I was planning to eventually leave the US (which I did years later). He was horrified and said, “why have they not separated you yet?” He wrote a recommendation to my commanding officer saying I absolutely needed to be separated but it was denied. My own father was worried about my mental health and contacted lawyers and eventually a congressman hoping to help me get out.

None of this worked and I had to resort to pretending to be suicidal which I had to do twice. Is there any other group on this planet that would aggressively fight so hard to force someone that clearly doesn’t belong to stay there?

Could you imagine a sports team with a player that hates the team and deliberately try’s to make them lose forced to stay under threat of prison? How about a church with a fedora level atheist that has to go every week or he will get arrested and he constantly tells everyone they’re stupid? Imagine you’re in a meeting at work and someone keeps saying they don’t believe in the company and are only there because they would go to prison. Would anyone who isn’t insane see the benefit of something like this?

I could imagine this might happen in countries with conscription but I would imagine that even they probably only take it so far. Here in Canada, the military allows people that don’t belong to quit. I’ve told people here about the US military no quitting policy and they think it’s insane.

Ironically, 17 year old me joined being very loyal. It took being treated horribly and outcasted to change that.

The military and vets are not looked on very highly in colleges. I know a lot of schools have organizations for vets but I’m a CG vet with almost no combat experience I worked in construction and never held a gun. Could I still go back and be a normal student and not be treated like shit or excluded

Unlike a lot of people I really don’t regret what I did but I really hated going through it. I was one of those I want to serve my country type people and I will say I am still proud of what I did and won’t forget it. But holy hell military life sucks. Unlike a lot of people my family was really supportive and good at trying to visit me and stay in contact with me, especially since I am in a very desirable location, but they are also ready for me to finish up. Military life is what I fucking hate. Having to have your phone on 247, getting called back into work because something so minuscule was done wrong, actually getting screamed at, people who don’t give a shit, boot lickers and goodie too shoes, alcoholism, suburban southern good ole boys. I feel like I wasted away my late teens and early 20s. I was really exited to go back and us my GI bill to go and make up for lost time but i don’t even want to go to a full time school, since I’ll be way different then the kids fresh out of hs,

I have posted here before but I now have info and am looking for clarification. I joined the guard and got a waiver for asthma but have been having issues and they re diagnosed me and gave me another inhaler. I brought this up to rsp Sgt and he said that I don’t have asthma and can’t leave unless I refuse to ship. He also said I’ll need to pay over a hundred thousand dollars back to the guard. I’ve only been to one drill and I don’t get how it’s possible. He also said that I will be screwed for life if I refuse to ship and won’t be able to get the future job I want. I have no interest in the military anymore and want to get out, I don’t want to go awol. But I need advice

After countless delays and unexpected hurdles I walked into IPAC an hour and a half before they opened, me and my friend were the first people there. When the first worker arrived they said I needed some signature on one of the countless forms so we rushed back, I found the corpsman on duty to scribble some signature and we got back to IPAC still the first people there. Another hour later I signed my DD214, I didn’t even know it was what I was signing but when the worker told me that was it I felt a sense of genuine happiness and freedom. I felt like the weight of the world had lifted off my shoulders and I could breathe without worrying about an immediate deadline or unexpected text in the work GC. This sounds terrible to admit but at one point I was someone who had drank the koolaide, and the feeling I had walking out of IPAC felt like it did when I at the hotel waiting to go to MEPS for the last time, the feeling of adventure and excitement that only comes from monumentous occasions.

I know life on this side of the gate isn’t all sunshine and rainbows but I can say that here my success is determined by my work ethic, my life is governed by my desire, my freedom can only be questioned if I break the law (the real law not the UCMJ) and therefore it is governable by me. I’m well aware that life isn’t fair and the real world can suck but nonetheless I’m overjoyed to accept the challenges that come with this new lease on life.

The reason I made this post is because I’ve been on this subreddit for a while, my story is on here somewhere but the tldr is about 4-5 months in I knew it wasn’t for me, had my chance to get out by refusing the covid shot but chickened out after believing the threats, I finally got out after 4 years. I wanted to say thank you to everyone on here, thank you to all those that listened to me pour my heart out, that listened to me complain, that listened to my rants, but most of all thank you for being here and thank you to the creator of this subreddit for creating a community for those of us ostracized from the supposed brotherhood and sisterhood of the military.

In closing I wanted to share a couple valuable lessons that helped me get through my time. The first being, value and self worth cannot come from the opinions of others, you need to find something within your own moral character to be proud of and while those around you pelt you with criticism you can look inside yourself and know your worth. In my case I sucked at running distance, I would constantly fall out until one day I realized that I wasn’t a bad person, I voluntarily help others no matter what previous grievances we’ve had, why should I allow their opinions of me be reflected in how I view myself. I was physically abused, I was waterboarded, and yes I was still extremely depressed and I hated every minute of being there but that internal gauge of self worth was one of the few things that kept me going. The other valuable lesson is that you need to act for yourself, if you’re even reading this the military is probably not for you so if you are on the fence about getting out or speaking up about something that might get you kicked out, weigh your options in terms of long term benefit to you. The military doesn’t care about you, the people in the military don’t care. If you’re worried your family will see you differently then so what, it’s your life and you’re the one that has to endure it. Make the right choice for you not for someone else’s opinion of you or what someone else in your position should do.

For those you still in, good luck and feel free to reach out to me. I’m here for anyone and everyone, if you need someone to vent to I’m

For those of you already out, thank you for the good advice along the way.

PS if anyone is working in finance I’m gonna be starting school in the relatively near future I know it’s a long shot but if you’re in the position and it’s not a hinderance I’ll soon be in need of internship experience and would greatly appreciate any advice or opportunities you have to offer.

Good evening people, it’s been 10 months since I backed out of my enlistment with the Army NG. I’m still on the books in my state and still haven’t received my discharge yet. Overall the more I’ve thought of it, it definitely was the best decision for me to make at the time. So for anyone who is really not sure about going please don’t. I had my toss and turns these last 10 months to see if it was the best decision which it was. I have no regrets anymore. I’m now in the process of advancing my career which I wouldn’t have been able to do if I went through.

Long story short I’m getting a chapter 13. BC and legal reviewed and approved the chapter. What happens next? CO pulled me aside to sign it today. I obviously chose not to appeal. Active army btw.

Army national guard, 31B

I don't know what I was thinking joining. I guess the college benefits just seemed too appetizing to not sign my life away. I haven't done basic, only done one drill, and I ship out tomorrow to fort Jackson for the arms 2.0 program because I'm 4% over my BMI limit due to a wide waist.

I know I'm not meant to be a soldier, I never will be. I stated that and was promptly threatened with the constable being sent after me if I don't arrive for my ship date. I know I sound like a pussy but I'm scared. Horrified actually.

I really don't think I should've even got past Meps, and I wish I didn't. Then I could've had more time to really think about what I was doing.

I know there's no way out now so I guess I needed an outlet to share my thoughts. Sorry.

Ok so, I'm 2 and a half years in out of a 6 year contract, in the national guard. I was split op in highschool so I'm a year into my "adulthood"/ a year with my current unit. I really want to get out.

I've always had bad mental health but was never able to get the help I needed or anything diagnosed. I grew up in a bad/abusive household, which no doubt contributed, but on top of that they never wanted to get me the help I needed, because that would mean there was a problem. Despite my attempts to ask for help to my parents, and even attempts to go to in school guidance and explain my situation, they weren't able to do anything without parental permission so that was swept away. I feel like it's led to an inner feeling of struggling to talk about my feelings, minimizing my problems, or altogether dismissing they exist.

Same thing with health issues, although I was scared into not saying anything at the doctors. Fast forward to now turns out I have asthma, and most likely have my whole life. I have to take inhaled medicine daily and I have an extra inhaler for emergencies. I sort of gaslighted myself into thinking my lungs were fine until a couple months ago and finally got a PFT, and got the news.

I know I shouldn't have joined in the first place, basic explanation but not an excuse, I went in with the mindset going through something so rough would somehow fix my mental issues and make me stronger as a person. If anything I think younger me saw it as an option out of desperation to stop feeling the way I do. And I wanted desperately to do something to make my family proud. Now I'm stuck in.

Recently I went through SRP for an upcoming deployment and I decided to be honest about my mental and physical health. I filled out the online pha honestly that way there was no way I could backtrack, because I knew I might struggle when it came down to it.

I was marked as non deployable and I'm on a temporary profile for my asthma while my treatment is figured out (3 month wait period) I was told to seek therapy but I'm not sure how concerned they are because nothing's really been communicated to me since then.

I have started therapy, diagnosed with depression and generalized anxiety disorder so far. I'm on an antidepressant, but mostly for insomnia. (amitriptyline 50mg) Hasn't really done much for how I feel depression wise. I have the option for more medication but I really don't wanna just treat everything with pills and call it a day. The insomnia was just desperation because I got to a point I was barely sleeping at all. But at this point part of me wants to go with more pills if it means getting me separated.

Since this is a throwaway and I don't have much to lose, I have reason to believe I could also have a personality disorder. BPD. I'm not diagnosed and I'm scared to even bring up my suspicion because my dumbass is scared that the therapist is gonna shut me down or refuse help because I know there's a stigma.

And I know how it sounds, and I know how easily the disorder gets thrown around. But I don't think I am healthy to myself or others. And no research I have done has perfectly described my mind like it does. And I fit all the diagnostic criteria.

But even if it's true it could take a long time to ever get diagnosed with something like a personality disorder.

I know it's something that would get me separated but I don't know if I can sustain waiting that long even to start the process of separation.

I don't think I'm suicidal but when my emotions are big I really easily impulsively do things that could harm me to that point. But nothing as far as getting hospitalized. The biggest recent thing would be I took about 10 exedrin thinking it might do something but It didn't do anything but make me feel sick for a day.

I don't know if I fit the criteria for separation or how to even go about this all. I don't even know my current situation with the guard. After SRP and getting marked non deployable they asked me to sign a bunch of ROIs for everywhere I'm being seen, and I haven't heard anything since. I've never voiced my desire to be separated.

Everything has been with administration at the nearby base that handled the SRP. I haven't even heard anything from my unit. I don't even think they know about my mental health. I had assumed everything would be communicated to them but they were about to have me do an ACFT despite my profile last drill so I guess that was not the case. Even then all they wanted was my profile and since I don't have one for my mental state, I didn't know if I should even disclose that part of it.

I think my unit knows there's something mentally wrong, but they've never addressed it with me. I'm a complete shut in at drills, never talk to anyone unless I have to, when I do I'm super awkward and I can tell but can't stop. I isolate from everyone else as much as I possibly can.

I dread going to drills, i feel intense anxiety leading up to them, and when I'm there I just feel depressed and numb and wanna go home.

Insanely long story short, I want out, and feel like I need out, but I don't know what the fuck I'm doing, and I'm so terrified of it all. I don't know if this is a cry for help or just a rant but here it is lol.

Prior service here who made the mistake twice thinking reserves would be better. Thinking of just not showing up for drills until they separate me. Wanting to know how this has gone for others? Keep in mind I believe I fall under the entry level separation as I have no gear and have not gone to ait yet and have no uniforms. What are my options here to get out. Already have a good civ job and the reserves need me I don’t need it.

I posted about how I became disabled and was separated on a bs "adjustment disorder" in '22. Well, I fought for a year to get my discharge date changed and the $2k the charged me as "overpayment" dismissed. It took calling every month and a Congressional Inquery, but I won.

I'm now 100%. I feel validated. They took my health from me. My ability to feel joy and happiness. The money doesn't fix anything, but now I can give my family better. The deserve so much more than what I can give them for staying with me through these difficult years. I found out that I have a genetic hypermobility disorder that my injuries and illness from the Navy aggravated. I will never get better. My quality of life will continue to decline. My mental health plummeted. I have PDD,MAD,GAD, panic disorder, and agoraphobia.

However, I choose to keep going because, if anything, I'm stubborn and spiteful. Even if it doesn't make me happy anymore, I'll achieve every goal I had before I enlisted. Maybe somewhere along the way I'll find the spark of life I lost. Maybe not. For now, I just want to be petty and show everyone who said I couldn't that I will.

I think it's ok to not get better and to be ok with not being ok...if that makes any sense? You don't have to be some inspirational story about overcoming whatever. You can just be. That's just me, though.

I’m going to die.

I’m gonna die if I don’t get out of here soon, cuz I’m going to kill myself.

Somebody in my plt just kts earlier this week, and like I guessed everyone’s just moving around it. So nobody would give af if I went. This chapter is taking too long and I’m tired of trying to get people to care.

My life has been for nothing. I’m ashamed.

All the hate I have for this job aside. This shit is really killing me.

-Constant headaches/ migraines & neck pain -My left knee pops & is in pain -my hip joints pop and give me pain when I move the wrong way -legs always sore

It just keeps adding up, i'm tired of PT. I'm tired of waking up at the ass crack of dawn.

I NEED A FUCKING BLUNT I'm starting to gain a dependency on alcohol, every weekend I spend drinking just to try and cope

My cars transmission took a shit and became more work than its worth so I sold it. So I can't drive to sick hall or do anything to get this shit taken care of.

I'm crashing out and i'm starting to show my frustration towards the civilians at H2F and starting to show a lack of giving a fuck at work.

I'm just so sick of this shit, I feel trapped. I'm the only 91F in my entire battalion onroute to deployment so getting chaptered via commanders approval is practically out the window.

I 18(M) have been having some pretty big issues mentally before and since I joined the army. Initially I thought if I just had structure it’d help ease it but, now I’m in AIT and it’s even worse, I wake up feeling stuck to my bed, staying up late going into spirals and overall having some pretty bad thoughts. I’m at the point where I realize the army isn’t for me especially due to my declining mental health here. I never was diagnosed with any mental illnesses or disorders, mainly because my family just was poor and I didn’t wanna have them go into debt because of me needing a therapist or having to pay for antidepressants.

But for the past 8 almost 9 years I’ve been struggling with issues and mood swings, with manic episodes that last several days or a few weeks then reaching a pit for weeks or months even. Some points it got bad and I got to a point of having suicidal idealization and constantly having breakdowns.

My recruiter had me pretty much deny everything if I wanted to get in at the time since I was never diagnosed there was no real reason to worry about it. Now that I’m in AIT I just can’t stand it anymore, even in basic it was bad I was constantly depressed and dejected the entire time I was there. I tried to go to religious services but it has had no avail within these months of training. I’m at the point where I feel like if I stay here it’ll just get worse no matter what. I just don’t know how to go about getting out, since I never had anything on record about mental issues. I’d appreciate any help I can get please.

I know you guys probably will say no given this Reddit group, but I’m 19 years old and I have a girlfriend, who I plan on marrying in a few years (yes, 19 and I’m making a decision like this, but don’t let that define how I make my life decisions, I am a critical and logical thinker when the time arises), however my dad (20 years in the army, joined at 18) says I should serve in the navy so I can learn a trade (plumbing as a Seabee) while I’m in and get any college paid for and learn how to use a gun, have some adventure, etc.

I don’t want any college degree, other than a few art courses online to get better at art and start a small business one day for extra money.

I like the idea of adventure, but what I really want is to move forward in my life, working to getting a good job I’d want, overall just starting my life. I do not however want to join when I will hurt my future wife and I mentally, and I could’ve instead gotten the same experience for my career in a trade school and started my life faster in a much better way. My gf would be there if I did go through the military, but would it really be better if I went the military way instead of trade school?

Should I join?

Why is it that military people can't explain something in a straight forward manner? Rather than a straight forward answer, they either give you incomplete information (missing key information), or they give some circular, round-about answer full of gibberish (acronyms) and unimportant tangential information. When you confront them about it, they act like you're the one with the problem! I literally had to tell a new report who is ex-military to 1. Stop using acronyms for everything because no one on the team knows what they stand for.. 2. Work on his communication skills -- to be more direct without embellishments. I've had the same conversation with other ex-military employees. I just want to understand this.

I promise you I am not reenlisting once these 2.6 years are up. You know, I should’ve listened to furious when he said “Don’t ever go in the Army, Tre. Black man ain’t got no place in the Army.” And now I see why. These regulations are not for anyone who isn’t white or female.

The cornrows on my head look more like a slick back haircut and are closely tied to a length of about half an inch to an inch from my scalp. I’m sure I’m more in regulation than almost everyone else in my unit who isn’t bald and I’m tempted to just walk in with cornrows. What’s the worst they can do if I do; it’s only the national guard, not even the real military.

I didn’t even know this sub existed.

I know you guys will probably tell me no but my brother wants me to join the military.

I’m (28F) currently working a decent job at a top Hotel Chain and currently living alone paying my own rent, bills and still have a little money left over. I had to ask to borrow money from him a few time and he went off on a tangent saying I need to join the army and it could improve my quality of life.

In Dec of 2020 during Covid I did go see a psychiatrist because I wanted to try a medication like Zanex to calm me down. Well turns out the doctor actually diagnosed me with Clinical depression, General anxiety disorder and PTSD. I tried to joint the airforce in 2022 and after listening to my brother who told me not to put this medical history down was DQ because they did a search on my medical history. During the evaluation the doctor told me there was a significant discrepancy with what I put and what was found. Along with a few other things like acid reflux and a Pap smear from 2019.

Now here I am again in 2024 with a recruiter. my brother has been in for 10 years with no medical history like mine and he won’t believe me when I say I am depressed. I stopped taking antidepressants back in 2021 with any doctor orders just weened off them. My brother has told me “you are living paycheck to paycheck, you don’t have anything going for you and you’re broke”. I go to meps to test tomorrow but feel this is all pointless given the history and I don’t feel I would pass even after a revaluation.

Am I wasting my time? Should I not even join if I’m having second thoughts and my medical history? What the fuck am I doing? My worst fear is me being so depressed while in. My brother is trying to convince me there is nothing wrong with me and all I need is a waiver. But even with a waiver the doctor can still say no. I believe this would improve my quality of life but don’t know if I can handle being in with my history of depression. If I could have it my way I would start my candle business and maybe go to s trade school? I just wanted some second opinions..

TL:DR Joined the military to start a good future for my wife and I, started having bad anxiety, don’t want to quit want to overcome it to save our future and my marriage.

Hello everyone. This is a tough situation but I need some advice on what to do or maybe useful tips. Recently I joined the military (Air Force) in hopes of creating a good future for my wife and I. I joined the Airforce because I thought that would be the best choice to basically do a job in the military without having to commit to a combat role, whilst giving my wife incredible benefits like some of my friends have. I left for basic/BMT and have been an anxious wreck ever since. My anxiety was initially based on my ability to complete tasks in BMT quickly. I was scared I would be recycled(meant to go back and repeat 2 weeks of training), because I wasn’t smart enough or there was something wrong with me. About half way through BMT one of the instructors pulled us into a classroom and told us some stuff that made my stomach absolutely flip and caused my anxiety to become even worse. He told us that even if we picked a desk job (me) we could be subject to being in the line of fire whether it be active combat or indirect fire ie mortars and rockets. This was something that I did not know. I genuinely thought that if you didn’t get a combat job you didn’t see combat simple logic to me. Since that day I’ve been obsessing with that fear, I think about it constantly. I’m crushing my wife and family talking about it constantly. I’m always researching whether or not those things are true. I’m currently in technical training and I have thought about giving up a lot but I don’t want to come back home empty handed and lose the future the military could’ve given us. So I need help how do I overcome my fear of War, combat, and developing PTSD perform well in the military and be happy again? Thanks to anyone who can help.

Today I officially started phase 1 for being chaptered (due to ABCP failure) I’ve got all my appointments scheduled, and I turn in all my CIF gear on Monday (army, active). Does anybody know, how long each phase takes? Like once I complete phase 1, how long till phase2? And then after phase 2, how long before I’m actually out the door? Does anyone have a general timeline? I got my BAR counseling today and also my counseling that states my abcp flag is being removed and an involuntary separation flag has been added

Update: my chapter is Chapter 13

I need advice on the best way to get a separation from NG as I am getting stressed out and having difficulty coping with RSP once a month after that I get severe body pains and have persistent back pain due to my desk job. I always feel depressed and have taken a few sessions with a behavior health practitioner and have nightmares as my Basic shipping date is coming closer in 2 months. Please help me to determine the best way to get out of NG