I've considered this before but I always brushed it off cause I didn't think I had many of the symptoms and I brushed of most behaviors as products of being shy, but after doing a little research and actually considering it, i think i might have it.

What actually kinda ticked me off on this possibility is that i always struggled to maintain eye contact. It might just be because im shy, have low self esteem or am short (cause I really am, so i have to crane my neck to look up at people when standing). The problem is, i find hard to make eye contact even with people i know, including my parents, i tend to just generally look in their direction, even when sitting. And when i force myself maintain eye contact, it feels uncomfortable and my eyes tend to drift unless i consciously force it.

Another few things are that im just really awkward and bad at holding conversation, especially starting it. And i prefer not having to talk to people i don't know and using body movement, like a bow or basic sign language instead. I like to walk around and daydream but only when no one else is around. And i also get really bad feeling like im cringing when i see movies, especially when people are arguin or doing something stupid and its like visceral reaction, which is a problem no one else in my family has.

However,i dont feel likei exhibit many other autistic traits, im really picky about the games i enjoy and i could talk about it for hours but i dont hyper fixate on anything, i dont have bad sensory issues except for a few specific sounds and textures that make me cringe which i feel is pretty normal. Furthermore, I feel like I have a pretty good grasp of social cues, and at times it feels like im super sensitive to them, i notice when people get annoyed at us or when my parents do things that could possibly annoy or incinvenience others, espececially on vacation, and it really annoys me when my parents cant pick up on it, but i might just be imangining things.

i don't feel normal! i don't feel neurotypical. i cant hold eye contact or conversations, i make random noises or fidget with my hands. i have terrible intrusive thoughts. i walk on my tiptoes too and trouble with speech. i don't think i am neurotypical. i want to ask my mother to get tested for autism or even OCD. i tried with ADHD but she didn't think i have it. any tips for asking a guardian for this?

How common is it for adults with ADHD or similar conditions. who are in their 20st or 30st, to have emotional immaturity, child like emotions and behaviours. and not even understanding emotions that relate to sex.

I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD and Bipolar at different times in my life (amongst other things), and while I fought and fought to be seen by a specialist for those as they run in the family, the minute I was diagnosed I started doubting.

I’ve also had several specialists query ASD but I can’t go down the diagnostic route due to finances.

Does it really matter? I’m not sure, I think it does for me. But how do you know for sure that it’s those things and not something else? Lack of a mineral? Stress? Trauma? Hormonal?

I just wish there was such thing as a quick and easy brain scan that immediately gave results as to any personality/mood/other disorders. Then I’d trust it and know for sure.

I'm uncertain if this is the right sub to ask in, and I apologize if it's not.

I've got ADHD but I love having black nails. I wanna know if there's a good way to purposefully stain my nails black? I have a hard time sitting down and actually putting in the effort to paint them. I'm also working on getting a diagnosis for Autism, but I'm 26 and it's hard when you're an adult where I live. I mention this because nail polish somehow can feel heavy? It's a little uncomfortable, but I deal with it for the most part. Is India ink a good option? Are there nail stains out there I could use? At the moment, I'm looking into India ink and a relatively thin clear coat polish.

Any help would be greatly appreciated!

I have a massive heap of traits from all over the spectrum of potential ADHD symptoms as well as several traits, especially when I was younger, that are either far more associated or only associated with autism. The only reason I hesitate to consider myself as autistic is because I'm naturally, at least seemingly so, of reading complex and nuanced social cues that my friends who are clearly on the spectrum have significant issues with.

I won't even try and get into all of the ADHD symptoms because it would be an incredible and massive laundry list from intense hyperfixations to debilitating executive dysfunction, that disallows me even basic hygiene consistently at times from sheer unwillingness to act, to a complete inability to plan, schedule, or dedicate myself to any project or task that requires sustained focus apart from my hyperfixations.

The traits of autism I've seen in myself, often, are years-long special interests that inhabit every inch of my mind, constantly fighting with or trying to coalesce into my frequently shifting hyperfixations. I'm also terribly affected by changes in routine that I specifically didn't decide upon, cognitive and sensory overload to a lesser extent (especially when too many things are on or around my, my brain becomes overwhelmed by the sensation of being cluttered and surrounded.). I also recall having a far, far harder time with social cues pre-puberty, before I had a trauma-triggered shift towards being as much of a social butterfly as possible from some bullying at school.

I also exhibit nearly every major pillar of BPD but I don't know how that ties into it. If any of y'all have any tips, advice, or feedback, or anything that could help me figure out what exactly I have so I can properly manage coping strategies, that'd be incredibly helpful

A guy friend from college has made a couple of comments around me that I think are “weird”. Not inappropriate, just very hungry for validation and external approval. It is seriously rubbing me the wrong way. And I’m beginning to get annoyed and think things like “why isn’t he reading the room?”

Many of his family are autistic (high needs levels). He said he isn’t. My family also have autistic members, but I was dismissed for evaluations. I’m starting to wonder if I am as well, and it annoys me that he gets to be himself while I heavily mask.

On the other side of this, I’m also a woman. Statistics show we do so much more mental hoop jumping than men to understand and cater to their emotional needs. Idk if my annoyance isn’t ableist, but valid and this guy is really saying dumb shit without contributing to the convo. Does any of this make sense !? Any advice !? I feel like I don’t really get this situation

ETA: The comments are just him sharing his personal feelings (usually self deprecating!) comments about himself. Stuff like “oh a girl would never even look my way” or pretending to play air drums randomly. He will also criticise his sisters who are pretty into feminism, and he’ll talk about how they are too harsh, but he isn’t vocal about women’s issues. It’s just attention seeking behaviour (in my opinion)

At first, sorry for my English I’m not a native speaker. I think its all appeared a couple months ago, but I don’t remember clearly. I’m a really sensitive person, I don’t think I’ve experienced anything traumatic, I wasn’t neglected as a kid but we have a rough time in our family because my dad had been working in the another city so I’ve been seeing him on the weekends. My mom was almost alone with me and my younger sister. Now my dad is in home with us. As I mentioned earlier, I can’t remember anything clearly so i started to write about my experiences in the diary but I can’t motivate yourself to do it daily so I don’t have almost any material to work with if we’re talking about describing my previous feelings. I know that I had very good times and the moments of passive suicidal thoughts, I don’t know when and why. My way of thinking about life is changing every day. I often feel like I’m closed in my head only with my thoughts and I don’t have connection with whatever is happening around me. I’m obsessed with diagnosing myself and I’m very self aware, I always analysed my way of thinking. It’s getting exhausting i don’t know what to do in August I told my friend that I’m depressed I don’t know why I did it I don’t think I’m depressed or have ocd I’m currently diagnosed with autism but I don’t think it’s all about that. I can say that in spring I had a time when I was thinking that my friend were against me they were joking from the thing I’ve done but I thought that I was the fucking worst human being possible I antagonised them every time I crossed the road with maybe small miscommunication with driver I would call myself a fucking thrash with zero abilities and that I deserve to die. I don’t even think that now but calling myself names Is a habit now. I don’t know why I’m writing this tomorrow I will regret this. Im trying to diagnose myself with everything now and I know that’s not good and appropriate. In general I never know what’s appropriate and what’s not. How much problems has the average middle class person? I really want to know because then I could compare my experiences to others. I’m really sorry for that gibberish, congratulations to you if you can read it. Have a good day

Hi! I would really like to hear your thoughts about which earplugs I should get. For context: I am quite lucky and where I live/sleep it’s totally quiet. The problems start when I have to go outside. I hate a lot of noises and easily get overstimulated because of them. I do not need the earplugs to cancel all the sounds but to just help with loud/background noises. I am not able to hear friends/people in general because of the noises. The worst is in the gym with music/screaming etc. I would really like a pair of earplugs to help with that. I was thinking about the loop experience or something like that but I’ve heard conflicting opinions about them.

I have sensory issues with metal cutlery and am looking for plastic or alternative options for adults. I’d like something reusable and available in Canada.

Thanks 😊

Been staying here for awhile and everyone seems so very normal. In particular, people love to be with other people, all the time. I can't tell if it's one of those things where societal pressure has made them conform, or they all just hide, or...?

Anyone here Italian?

[EDIT: OMG IM SO SORRY I MEANT NEURODIVERGENT PEOPLE IN THE TITLE. THANK YOU KIND PERSON IN THE REPLIES FOR POINTING THAT OUT!!]

Hey everyone, I hope you're doing well! So here's the thing:

So I've come to the realization that my close friends (both current or past close friends) are all neurodivergent. I do have a few neurotypical friends (or specifically acquaintances), but I've never actually felt close to them.

It feels like me and my neurodivergent friends just click. And I do find most of their experiences extremely relatable and familiar.

I also show strong indicators of neurodiversity such as; hyper fixation (and by hyper fixation I mean losing sleep over my interests, dreaming about them, talking to people about them...) and struggles with making friends (I never approach people first.), struggles with paying attention (which is not a strong indicator because most people have problems with that.), not understanding some social cues... etc

I'm talking based on my own research, and by research I mean spending hours reading about neurodiversity/psychology instead of studying everyday

I did show these symptoms as a child too but people are ignorant of neurodiversity where I live so there was no way i could've been diagnosed.

I just wanna know if I should see a psychiatrist and take a test or if i should just leave it at that?

Thanks for reading!

No diagnosis but have long suspected autism and/or ADHD.

Wondered if some people on this sub might be able to relate to my dilemma, and might be able to offer advice on how to get through situations where you feel “softlocked” by a lack of adequate information.

To be very specific, I greatly struggle with making arrangements with my doctor’s surgery (general appointments, arranging blood tests, etcetera).

It feels like there are all these million little factors making interfacing with my surgery very difficult: needing to call at certain times, but not knowing if I need to call for an emergency appointment or not; stressing about appointment availability conflicting with my work hours; not having one single GP so never knowing who I’ll be speaking to and not having a familiarity like I did at my old practice; not knowing if it’s okay/best to email or ask in-surgery or ring the number…stuff like that.

Frequently I feel like I don’t have the information I need to act, but I also don’t know how to articulate what problem I’m having (at least without it coming across like a non-issue to the person hearing it).

While I’m struggling to think of specific examples here, the doctor’s isn’t the only thing I struggle with—it’s any time I don’t have a clear understanding of the process I need to follow, especially if there’s a threat of social humiliation (regarding the doctors, I find reception staff and frequently clinicians themselves to lack understanding and patience).

I can get by seamlessly enough my day to day until I don’t know what steps to take and don’t know how to articulate (even sometimes to myself) what the problem is, and I feel like I get mentally tied up and unable to proceed because there are too many little things I’m not sure about. Usually it’s lack of clarity over my objectives, but that’s not an easy thing to, you know…know how to ask for help with…?

Maybe this post makes as little sense to anybody else as it does to me trying to write it, but on the off chance someone DOES understand, I’d love some advice on what you do when you feel you don’t have the info needed to proceed and it’s something other people seem not to have issues with.

I feel I can’t ask for more support from my GP surgery (eg asking if I can communicate with them by email rather than phone), since again I’m not diagnosed with anything specifically, and I’m reluctant to open that conversation with them due to fears of potentially losing access to certain care I’m currently receiving if I approach them regarding neurodivergency.

I had to disclose my condition due to requesting accomodation. I didn’t want to.

Instead of going to HR, my supervisor has been talking to fellow team members for advice on how to support me as a “group” effort - essentially telling them my details (gossiping). Like it’s a community effort to ‘check my work’ and check in with me.

Although…the one person he WONT speak to is HR! He’s talked to team people about my condition, not made progress on my accessibility equipment, just gotten rumors and audits going. Pulled back from clients. Eased out information because he’s “taking care of it.”

I emailed all stakeholders directly because this is nonsense and it’s being ignored. No one is responding, because they’re satisfied with “taking care of it”? With gossip, rumor, obstruction? Isn’t that illegal? This is an org with 30k people.

What TF is this??? I’m thinking “group support” to drive someone out bc they feel so humiliated? It’s working!

The request was so small - just a computer setting. The response is so overdramatic - like a community event.

Hi there and happy Halloween! Our company Blu Star Productions is ISO of a neurodivergent web designer and outreach coordinator. If anyone here is interested or know someone who is interested please dm me for details. Thank you!

Hi all! I wanted to share a project I have been working on called MaskOff. MaskOff is a community where neurodivergent adults can unmask, be their authentic selves and meet like minded individuals while maintaining mental wellness.

If you are interested in learning more about the community, please go to maskoffapp.com for more information!

If you are interested in testing the beta version of the app and sharing feedback with the creators before the app is live for the public, please share your email at the bottom of the home page under "Join the Community".

I'm looking forward to creating a platform where neurodiverse individuals can thrive!

Maskoff.com @maskoff.app Xx

Currently beating myself up because I guess I had a couple bad days at work at the beginning of this month (I work as a toddler teacher) and the floating teacher who was in my room (my regular teacher was on vacation) felt I was being short with her and the kids.

I mean I probably was without realizing it. I was incredibly overstretched and trying my best. Anyway instead of talking to me apparently she talked to a couple other teachers and it reached my boss.

I feel like I can’t let the mask slip even a little bit at work. I want my boss to think I’m a good teacher. I feel like a fraud who’s just playing the part. I’m not really this Mary poppins like toddler teacher. Deep down I’m fighting urges every day. I try so hard to have my boss and coworkers like me.

I wish she would have asked me in the moment “are you ok? You seem stressed” but she didn’t. And even though my boss seemed very understanding I feel like the mask is starting to chip.

I love my job most of the time. I like feeling like I’m bettering the world.

I'm currently in a bachelor of three years going on six, and I'm absolutely miserable because of how incompatible I am with how education is delivered at my university... I wanted to know if there were any institutes that might be a bit more flexible and accommodating with their teaching approaches? I understand that I'm unlikely to find a hidden gem, but any amount of advice helps!

If I leave this world and reincarnated into new one, but I will be born as a neurotypical. However, I will remember my past life memories as a neurodivergent.

Would my new life have lesser struggles? I mean because my brain is wired to be normal now, I'm certain I don't have the struggles that much but I believe past life's experiences with those who were unfriendly to such community will still make me fearful for future occurrences.

I have been applying to jobs like crazy for the last month, with at least over 100 applications, and I have had 0 luck. I have only had 4 interviews, and I cant get past the interview stage. Jobs that reply to me are either places that decline me at the first interview, or places that are obviously under-staffed and churning through people with no regard to the actual applicant.

I have applied for office assistant roles, technician, librarian, analyst, retail and food service roles, and cant get a real offer at all.

It's like "people with AuDHD need not apply" out there.

The last few times I have been hired, I get work-place bullied out, or relegated to the most undesirable tasks.

Have any of you had luck with finding a good job, and what has it been like?

I (20s M) have high-functioning autism and have been working on putting myself in more social situations. I've been using the opportunity to try to be more authentic as well. Naturally, the idea of masking came up. Certain behaviors are clearly masking like stifling echolalia at work, holding eye contact when I'd rather not, and hugs/handshakes.

But what about functional practices? I've had a lot of training in communication from my time as a teacher, and I still use certain techniques to come off more clearly to other people. It may be adopting dialect or regional idioms, it might be vocal emphasis, or even emphatic nodding to encourage people to explain themselves more.

I see it as effective communication practices, and I personally like to show empathy through these gestures, but it's been called out as masking in a few situations now. I admit it is taxing and not completely automatic behavior, but my choices to make that behavior are authentic to my motivations.

I've even had a few people suggest that this behavior is antisocial and/or manipulative. I guess I'm conflicted on that point because from my perspective, it's a deliberate choice I'm making to be pro-social. That said, I can see how using micro-expressions and years of communication training could be seen as an unequal playing field.

Can anyone illustrate this from a NT perspective? I'm not sure I completely understand how this feels socially. I get the words 'chaotic' and 'adaptable' a lot, but they always seem tied to very ambivalent emotions when I hear them.

I don't know if this is the right place for this question, but does anyone feel like they've become less sharp and find it harder to function in the world after the lockdown/quarantine/social distancing happened? I'm not officially diagnosed with ASD, but I take meds for ADHD, so at least my doctor thinks that I have those traits. I've just noticed since we came back from that, my mind is foggier and everything using my mind is more difficult now. anyway, just curious if others feel the same...

edit: not sure if it's just me, but from my responses, it seems like there's something wrong with me that's deeper than just isolating during the time when things were shut down. it wasn't easy or quick for me to come out of isolation, and I know that it's been almost 5 years, but my perception of time is tweaked and it doesn't feel like it was that long to me.

It's my first Halloween in the house I bought. I live in a family orientated area with hundreds of houses. I made 56 bags of treats for the kids trick or treating.

About 5 hours ago a kid stopped by, he was on his own, no parent and he was about 14/15 years old and didn't have a costume, just a mask. I got a vibe instantly that he may be disadvantaged and he seemed embarrassed by his mask which he said he took off as it was warm. He also apologised about it a few times. I told him it was no problem and gave him an extra bag of treats and made some conversation about Halloween (tis the season of small talk). Conversely I had some teenagers by in no costumes demanding sweets. It has been hours later and I'm still feeling a sad by the vibe and thinking of the kid. I just hope he had a good night.

This is just one example of how I'll work myself into sadness or rumination. My partner who is NT just instantly forgot after I said it to him. Maybe it's just I'm hyper aware of people's feelings now as I've gotten it wrong growing up.

Just a little talk from me into the reddit void. I hope you are all doing well and Oíche Shamhna Shona Daoibh.

TLDR: I couldn't tell when I was zoning out, and I was a good student and well behaved, so I didn't realize I was missing things until high school.

When I was in middle school I got tested for learning disorders, because I had inexplicably gone from "gifted kid" in elementary school, to struggling in middle school. No head injuries or anything. I didn't really know what ADHD was at the time. When I got tested, they suggested I might have ADHD, because I kept looking up from my paper and seemed to be daydreaming. I insisted I didn't, and that I was just trying to think of an answer to the questions on the test.

They concluded that they thought I had slow processing speed. In high school, I realized something I never realized before. When I THOUGHT I was paying attention, I actually wasn't. This thing kept happening where at the end of class the teacher would say something about an assignment we were going to do the next day for example, and needed to prepare for beforehand. I would go into class the next day, not having done it, and all my classmates said that the teacher told us about it before. I was very confused, because I could have sworn I was paying attention and heard everything the teacher said, but the evidence showed I hadn't.

I didn't realize I was doing it, but I think during the testing in middle school, when I thought I was just thinking of an answer, I was actually zoning out, but not sensing the extra time pass, so I didn't feel like I had zoned out. Since I figured out I have ADHD and got diagnosed, I believe the slow processing speed diagnosis was incorrect, and it was ADHD the whole time. In middle school I thought I knew myself well and knew how my brain worked. But evidently, I didn't.

So that's why I didn't get diagnosed with ADHD sooner. And also, I wasn't outwardly hyperactive, I was always nice and I was quiet, and always tried my best to show the teachers I was paying attention. I was really fidgety though. I tried to do my work, but I got really burnt out, but no one suspected anything because it was right after the pandemic, and many students weren't doing super well mentally at the time, after going through all that.

It is so trippy and weird that I couldn't tell when I was zoning out. That everyone else will hear something the teacher said, who I thought I was listening to, yet I didn't hear it. I think that's why I like glitch in the matrix stories so much. They're relatable, and make me feel less alone. Did anyone else have any similar experiences to this? Can you tell when you zone out? Sometimes I can and sometimes I can't.

Why or Why not?

By all definitions it seems to fit.

Psychosis and Mania affect our behaviours and thinking (as does depression)

But even in the Bipolar community there are mixed feelings

Let it fly!

So... I (33M) need some advice. I think I have ADHD (and possibly autism), and so does my therapist. Most of my life I've felt completely out of place, to the point that for a bit as a kid I seriously considered the possibility that I was secretly an alien (silly, I know). My memory sucks and is extremely visual, I have emotional outbursts, reading and even listening to online courses for more than a few minutes is impossible, I can't take notes, I apologize all the time, people say things right next to me that I don't hear... it's a lot and not knowing why has been stressful for... well, decades. I also have anxiety disorders.

Testing however has always come back allistic. I had an "Asperger's" test in my teens, and they said I wasn't autistic. I've recently taken two ADHD evaluations, and both came back without a diagnosis; however, I have doubts about the results. The first one, the NP said that my memory was too good (I put in extra effort to remove distractions during the evaluation though) and only cared about the depression and increased my Lexapro dose. That helped for a week but hasn't addressed the cause and I'm starting to feel depressed again. The second one was an actual psychiatrist, but I feel like she thought I was just after meds and she mentioned that she feels ADHD is over diagnosed, which is the opposite of what I usually hear.

My therapist is pretty confident that I'm ADHD-PI though, so I am going to try again today. However, at this point I'm doubtful myself. I can't tell if it's imposter syndrome, or just wanting somewhere to fit in, or even just looking for excuses for my own shortcomings. I'm pretty sure today's evaluation will be no different. Has anyone else had to be evaluated multiple times? Or am I just neurotypical and fooling myself? I'm sorry. I'm kinda at the end of my rope with stress from my job. Also I've held the job for two years, which is another point towards neurotypical, but it's the longest I have and honestly I've already becoming completely burnt out and could have been fired multiple times over.

I don't even really know where I'm going here. I guess I want to vent. Sorry if this shouldn't be here. I'll delete if that's the case.

I am diagnosed ADHD and peer-reviewed Autistic and was just offered something called neurofeedback therapy.

Does someone have experiences with that? Or articles about it from an AuDHD (patient) perspective?

At least some versions of it seem to have pretty solid evidence of bringing about the intented outcomes, but it somehow gives me weird vibes. Isn't that how brainwashing works? Puppy training not on a behavioural but neurological level?

I'm conflicted what to think about it. On the one hand, anything that helps me to calm down and organise my life with little expected side effects could be great. On the other hand, the whole thing feels fishy. I could really need some input for my decision.

So I am very aware there is a connection between hypermobility and neurodivergence and I am going to see a doctor soon about sorting out what is acc going on w me and adhd and possible autism.

I have looked into hypermobility criteria fairly extensively and I do not qualify as having generalised hypermobility, largely because my legs seem to be whatever the opposite is, however I have three hypermobile close relatives and my fingers, thumbs and shoulders have very large ranges of motion (as in touch forearm with thumbs, hold hand behind my back, pinkies abnormally flexible, one thumb bends back abnormally far). I have also experienced quite a lot of the symptoms associated with HSD such as digestive issues, fatigue, weird foot and joint pain.

Is this worth mentioning? I have been so invalidated constantly by medical professionals, they consistently refuse to take me serious despite my life being an absolute mess and clearly being unwell. I just need someone to take me seriously and get to what is acc going on.

So I am aware of the strong association between autism and adhd with hypermobility but does this relationship exist with other types of neurodiversity?

Are people with autism/ adhd and hypermobility more likely to display certain symptoms within their neurodivergence than those who are not hypermobile?